Beyond Reason
by KaseyJae
Summary: It had all started out as a routine mission, a fairly easy one even. And yet, in hindsight, Colonel Jack O'Neill and Major Samantha Carter found it had turned their whole lives upside down... as well as their relationship. Sam/Jack, Slow Build, COMPLETE
1. Beginning

_**Beyond Reason**_

 _By KaseyJae_

 _ **Summary:**_ _It had all started out as a routine mission, a fairly easy one even. And yet, in hindsight, Colonel Jack O'Neill and Major Samantha Carter found it had turned their whole lives upside down… as well as their relationship._

 _ **Genre:**_ _Adventure/Romance/Drama and a decent bit of whump. Because I was in the mood for it._

 _ **Pairing:**_ _Sam/Jack. What else?_

 _ **Setting:**_ _Somewhere in the middle/at the end of season 5, so contains various spoilers for this season. Also I'm seriously going to temper with the episodes order and the timeline. You've been warned._

 _ **Rating:**_ _M_

 _ **Feedback:**_ _Yes, please! Still working on my English and writing skills, so I appreciate all constructive feedback. I may not be able to answer all reviews because I lack the time, but I am sincerely grateful for them and will answer all direct questions and PMs._

 _ **Disclaimer:**_ _All publicly recognizable characters, places and settings belong to their rightful owners: Stargate Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM, Double Secret Productions and Gekko Productions. Any resemblances to people, events, stories or locations are purely coincidental. This work is simply for entertainment purposes and no copyright infringement is intended. Also, no money is made out of this. However, this story, any original characters, the settings and situations are property of the author and not to be copied or distributed!_

 _ **Beyond reason**_

 _Chapter One – Beginning_

Daniel actually held up for a moment, inhaling deeply, while his eyes lost focus for a moment, gazing unsteadily at some point somewhere over General Hammond's shoulder. Jack tried to suppress it, but he couldn't help the small hint of hope that spread through him. Knowing Daniel, this gesture could only mean two things: either he was – finally! – finished, or he was preparing for another long, drawn-out launch into whatever he also deemed necessary to know about… Jack had to consult the thick folder in front of him on that. P3T-643. Oh, that rhymed! Guess, that could become a planet he would remember. Maybe.

General Hammond at the front of the briefing table shifted and Daniel snapped out of his stupor. Quickly the archaeologist gazed around the table, ensured himself of General Hammond's and Carter's still concentrated attention and then opened his mouth…

"The weather on P3T-643 is, from the telemetry we received from the UAV, very mild. Sun radiation's low and the temperature's constantly varying around 70°F. Astonishingly, there is little difference in between the day and the night, but this could also be an effect of the current season we have on this planet. To rule this out, there would have to be a long-term exploratory–"

Jack tuned the man out. Once again. For the love of him, he just couldn't understand, what was so damn important about all those little details. Daniel had successfully rambled on for about – Jack glanced at his watch – _two hours_ about the planet they were going to visit next-mission, and so far they hadn't even reached the important parts! He swore the archaeologist's _briefings_ (didn't that come from brief, meaning short?!) tended to grow longer each time.

So far they had discussed the flora. And no, Daniel could not just say 'covered mostly by huge trees and thick underbrush', no he just _had_ to describe the respective plants. Each and every one. Who the hell cared if the planet was stuck under a bunch of oak-trees, pine-trees or palms?! And who exactly was interested in the fact which kind of fern grew in between the afore-mentioned trees? Didn't they have some botanists or something along those lines Daniel could annoy with that? Why did it have to be him?

Then came the fauna, of which – much to Jack's not-so-silent pleasure – the UAV hadn't brought back any data yet, so Daniel was unaware of. Yet. Had he ever mentioned, how nice of a word 'unaware' was? But if Jack interpreted the angry glance the archaeologist had shot him during his rather obvious display of gratitude for the factor 'unaware' in the right way, then his friend intended to research that topic thoroughly and Jack would have to read a probably huuuuge report on this sometime in the future. Yay.

Then Daniel had flung himself into an overwhelming speech of which cultures he suspected could have lived on this planet, because he wasn't sure of it. So 'could' being a key word here. The UAV had made out some ruins in the closer vicinity of the Stargate, but the huge trees, no matter which ones, had blocked the view on them, so it could probably be anything. And Jack could practically feel Daniel's impatience to go and examine those ruins all across the briefing room. But was that any reason for him to have to sit through 50 minutes of Daniel musing out loud, which culture he would have liked best to have settled on this planet?

To be honest, Jack was surprised General Hammond had let the archaeologist prevail as far as he had. The only explanation Jack could think of was that the General had dropped out earlier as well and only kept a straight face to a charade. He couldn't really be interested in all that… details, could he? Actually, the only one still attentively listening had to be Carter, Jack mused. Teal'c was sitting patiently with a stoic face, but his eyes were averted. A slight smile graced the Jaffa's lips that had Jack pondering what the other man could be thinking about. It certainly hadn't been the amount of water on P3T-643 Daniel had lectured about or the assumed natural and mineral resources he'd talked about. Couldn't be.

Sighing, the Colonel leaned back in his seat, fiddling with his fingers in boredom. Idly, he wondered how many topics exactly Daniel could come up with that could be discussed about a planet which, until now, appeared utterly deserted. From what the Colonel had caught in between the lines neither the initial MALP nor the subsequent UAV had even stirred a mouse on that planet. Or whatever the alien equivalent of a mouse would be.

Again a pointed break in which Jack perked up, hoping against better knowledge that his friend would finally come to an end, but again, Daniel just droned on unimpressed. This time, Jack barely managed to stifle an exhausted groan. Really, the Goa'uld could learn a thing or two from Daniel about torture…!

Jack began to swing his chair from left to right, trying about anything to keep himself occupied or he would so crash Daniel's little party here. And it would be nasty.

Jack caught Teal'c's gaze over the briefing table and held it for a moment. Both men smiled at each other secretly and once more, Jack was left to consider how useful such a Jaffa poker face could be. Really, if Teal'c didn't want it, then nobody could decipher anything from his facial expressions alone. And physical reactions he showed just as seldom. How very practical. It assured that Teal'c never got scolded when getting bored during a briefing, something Jack achieved on an almost weekly basis.

Suddenly, his chair bumped against something and his leg came into contact with something warm. Astonished, Jack looked to his side. His chair got stuck with the one standing next to him and the warmth spreading through his leg was actually the body heat of the person occupying the other chair, because his leg was pressed against another thigh. Startled he looked up, only to gaze directly into light blue eyes. Carter.

She looked at him, smiling hesitantly. The slightest hint of hope shone from her open gaze. Hope that he'd done it deliberately, he knew immediately.

Jack was careful to not even let a slip of emotion pass onto his face. He shifted his legs aside so his right knee wasn't in close proximity to her thigh anymore and then pushed his chair away, bringing more distance between them than before, so if he would feel the need to move again, he would have no possibility to bump into her accidentally.

Jack looked back towards Daniel, his face impassive and emotionless, but from the corner of his eyes, he could see Carter's face fall. For a tiny moment she lowered her head and he could tell she was gnawing on her lower lip from the way her jaw moved. A sting raced through him at the sight of her. He could almost feel her hurt, caused by him, because he was ignoring her. And it actually hurt him to see her hurting.

Jack balled a hand into a tight fist under the briefing table, the only visible outlet for the anger he felt that he allowed himself. He didn't want to do it. He didn't want to force that distance between him and Carter. Hell, the only thing he wanted to do _so_ _badly_ was to return his leg to where it had rested a moment ago to be able to feel her body against his. Jack actually liked having Carter close. He liked seeing her, liked watching her, when she was looking somewhere else, liked having her inflict agonizing technobabble on him and liked 'accidentally' touching her. He enjoyed her being around him, but for some time now he denied it himself. He avoided her as much as possible. His life felt strangely deprived without her constant presence and the reassuring closeness they had with each other and yet he forced himself to bring distance between them. He just couldn't allow this closeness any longer. He had to put a stop to it. Because he and Carter had crossed the line, somewhere. Jack had known for quite some time that there were certain feelings between them, but they had never been of much concern to him. He had accepted them, knowing that given their situation, there was nothing he could do about them anyways, and continued on, mostly acting as if those feelings were nonexistent. He knew these feelings could pose a certain risk, but he'd always thought he'd been careful, hadn't let anything slip. Yet, apparently, he had. He had been too obvious in his feelings for her and by that he'd endangered her. He'd offered her up, made her vulnerable, practically painted a target on her back.

Jack resisted the urge to scrub his hands over his face agitatedly, when the familiar thoughts crossed his mind again. It hadn't been that long ago. The mission gone completely wrong, before it had even started. The mission which had left Carter controlled by an alien entity. The mission in which they had ended up as foes and he had needed to shoot her down. It marked one of the worst moments in his career. But essentially, he had no one to blame but himself. He was the reason why the entity had taken her over. He was the reason why she'd died. And he was the reason why she'd almost remained dead. Because he had been the one who wanted to destroy the entity's nest, which would have destroyed her. Jack was honest enough with himself to acknowledge he'd been led by his feelings, his instinctive hatred, mistrust and anger, and thus he had lost his objectivity. It was only thanks to Daniel and Janet that he'd still gotten Carter back.

Jack had had weeks to think the events through and by now he wanted nothing more than for his head to finally shut the hell up. He despised the conclusions it came up with, but at the same time, he knew it was the damn truth. He had done nothing but bringing Carter in danger. And he'd never wanted to see her in it again, thanks to him. He couldn't really prevent her from being in danger, not with the job they did, but he still intended to do anything possible to keep her safe. Because he didn't want to lose her. She was still a vital part of his team and she still belonged to the little family they had created from SG-1. And Jack still needed her. Needed her more than he actually let himself admit, even to himself. But he couldn't allow any closeness between them that went over their strictly professional relationship. He would never forgive himself if anything happened to her and he was to hold responsible for that.

So Jack did the only thing he could. He pushed her away. He tried to nip whatever intimacy occurred between them in the bud. No lingering gazes, no hidden touches, no standing too close to her anymore.

He was aware that it hurt her. She didn't know the reason for his sudden change of heart and Jack wasn't about to explain himself. Until now she had only started little attempts at getting him to talk and he had all but smashed them immediately. Jack was well aware that the moment he'd let her in again, history would only repeat itself. And the moment he allowed the closeness to return to them full-force, he would get them both in danger. Because their enemies weren't only to be found on alien planets. They were at the front lines and they had to fight battles on all sides. Politics and bureaucracy had a close eye on them, waiting for them to screw up to finally have an excuse to take the Stargate Program down or over. And Jack really didn't want to give them any leverage to come after him or Carter. He wouldn't allow them to get anywhere near his family.

And despite knowing all this and trying his hardest, Jack could watch himself mess up time after time. He was all aware that he had just toed a fine line when the incident with Adrian Conrad had happened. Carter going missing had nearly been enough to send him over the edge. He'd held on as best as he could, while he had been searching for her, but the knowledge that he'd almost come too late, that there might have been nothing he could have done any more for her had he been only a second later, when he had finally found her, had made him almost storm General Hammond's office to demand some downtime to go hunt those bastards down. He knew he would have succeeded. He was Special Forces after all. But he also knew that it would tell a few people more about his relationship with Carter than he was comfortable to admit. And, if anything, the encounter with the entity had made it grossly clear to Jack that Carter was his weakness. Nothing got to him as anything getting to her. So whoever wanted him to suffer only had to make her suffer. And Jack vastly preferred this knowledge to remain unknown.

So as far as he was concerned, Jack preferred her angry at him but alive, than her at peace with him but in constant danger.

Jack chanced a side-glance at her. Her eyes were firmly glued to Daniel, her face giving no indication on something even bothering her. It was carefully schooled. Too carefully. Years upon years being her CO made him see the little details nevertheless. She tried too careful to not glance his way, tried too much to overlook his presence beside her. Jack was prepared for the painful jolt that shot through his body and he wasn't let down. Ignoring Carter hurt her, which in turn hurt him. It was almost like a physical injury that wouldn't stop bleeding. There was a constant, burning ache somewhere in his chest that Jack didn't dare place any further. And whenever she threw him one of those pained, uncomprehending gazes that spoke volumes of her confusion it was like a clean cut right somewhere through his middle. Yeah, those Goa'uld could also learn a thing or two from Carter where torture was concerned.

Jack wanted badly to right things between them. But he didn't know how without repeating the same mistakes all over again. Because there was no way he could just be _a little_ close to Carter. With her it had always been all or nothing. He didn't want anything less with her. Either they were only the friends, the comrades their working relationship condemned them to be or they would be the whole package. Jack wouldn't settle for less. Not when he'd seen what this less would mean for her. Half-assed attempts didn't gain her anything. Obviously it only managed to endanger her. And that was something he couldn't stand. Wouldn't stand for. So, as long as they couldn't have this something they still tried to lock away in some infamous room, he was determined to be her friend. And nothing but her friend. Hoping against all odds that she wouldn't just get annoyed beyond words with his attitude and told him to shove his determination someplace the sun didn't shine.

"Alright SG-1, you have a go.", General Hammond suddenly announced.

Jack blinked. Huh, he hadn't even noticed Daniel had finally managed to wrap up his presentation (you really couldn't call that a briefing anymore).

"Get to those ruins and examine them. Try to find out if there is life in any form on that planet, but do not chance any interaction if you're unsure where their loyalties lie.", the General ordered, standing up.

Immediately Jack and Sam copied his movement with routine. Daniel and Teal'c followed at a more sedate pace.

"Yes, sir.", Jack acknowledged the command in behalf of his team.

"I'll give you four days for an initial assessment. Report back to the SGC all 24 hours.", the General continued.

"Yes, sir.", Jack repeated, completely professional although the order didn't really sit well with him.

General Hammond smiled at him, a genuine, indulgent smile, but still Jack had the uncomfortable feeling that the General saw right through him. Suddenly Jack had the distinct thought that the General would be the wrong person to play poker with. Because despite what the man appeared to feel, he always managed to look as professional as possible.

"Get geared up.", the General advised. "You'll be embarking at 1400. Dismissed."

Jack hurried from the room first. Somewhere in the background he could hear Carter and Daniel discuss something or another about their next mission, but for once he didn't stop to wait for his team. No, for once Jack couldn't get away from them fast enough. After all he had less than two hours to prepare himself mentally that he would be stuck four days with his 2IC on a deserted planet, while they weren't exactly on speaking terms. Talk about a fun mission…

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"So, Sam. How's the program coming along?", Daniel asked innocently, trudging down the hallway next to her.

Sam sighed imperceptibly. He really didn't want to talk about that, did he? Still, being able to assess Sam's mood accurately after years of being best friends, Daniel knew it was the only thing she would be willing to talk with him about right now.

Sam halted at the elevator and pressed the button for it, wishing it to travel slower than usually. She wanted to give the Colonel a head start, so she wouldn't have to be in the cramped locker room together with him. The atmosphere between them was awkward at best nowadays and whenever she was within his close proximity the tense stiffness taking over his body was threatening to suffocate her. Let alone that he had stopped smiling at her in any way, he didn't seem able to even look at her and Sam was at a total loss what could have caused this change in behavior in him. There had been no identifiable reason for her, so the only thing she could think of was herself. There had to be something she had done horribly wrong. But she couldn't think of anything and whenever she tried to ask him, he effectively shut her off. There had been a time they had understood each other blindly and while Sam still could read him accurately, she now failed to see the reasons behind his behavior. Never had she felt so left out, so shut out from him. As if he was deliberately cutting her off from him. As if he didn't want her to come near him anymore.

The elevator opening his doors in front of her jolted her back into her conversation with Daniel. He was looking at her expectantly.

"Good.", she finally managed to answer. "It's already working, but I want to improve the user's interface, before I'll give it to you."

"Nice.", he commented, an excited smile crossing his face.

Sam managed to grin back, even though she lacked the proper excitement. She knew she should feel as giddy about it as Daniel, but, yeah, her nowadays always present sadness and uncertainty prevented that. Sam had successfully finished writing a computer program Daniel could use to translate unknown languages. He could fill the program with whatever he had already translated and use it to figure out other words or the grammar of the language by comparing the pieces of language he had already deciphered with all other languages known to them. Sam was rather proud of that program – or had been, until recently. Now she still felt a bit of the satisfaction of having finished a project successfully, but it was dulled by the fact that nobody would care for her achievement. Well, given, Daniel would, tremendously even, and she was grateful for it, but he wasn't the one she wanted to see the stunned, appreciative grin from…

Exhaling frustrated, Sam entered the elevator and hit the button for the floor where the locker rooms were located with decidedly more force than necessary.

"So…", Daniel drawled, eyeing the innocent button warily. "I take it things haven't improved…?"

Sam clenched her teeth. She had just known they would land on this topic sooner or later. Daniel couldn't just _not_ interfere with other people's lives.

"I don't want to talk about it!", she thwarted him immediately.

Daniel made some indefinite sound to it that Sam chose to see as an agreement. For a second there was silence, in which Sam watched the levels fly by on the elevator's operating panel's display they were leaving behind.

"Did you talk with him about it?", Daniel suddenly picked up their conversation.

By now Sam was seriously tempted to tell her friend to mind his own business. Why did he _have_ to drill into an open wound?

"I tried.", she admitted briskly. Several times even.

"He didn't tell you?", Daniel guessed.

"He's the Colonel.", was all Sam answered, but it was a definite yes.

"Huh.", Daniel grunted, mulling it over in his head.

There was another minute of blessed silence, until the elevator arrived at their destination and they got off, wandering down the hallway.

"Did you–?", Daniel tried, but Sam interrupted him immediately, being at her patience's end with him.

"Daniel, he doesn't want to tell me!", she snapped.

And she was sure of it. Whatever the Colonel's problem was with her, he didn't seem inclined at all to explain it to her. And, honestly, right now Sam felt she had better chances at getting the Goa'uld to sign a peace treaty with Earth than she had at making Colonel O'Neill talk about feelings when he wasn't willing to cooperate. At all.

So as much as Daniel (and Sam herself) wished for the former relationship between her and the Colonel to return, Sam didn't see what she could do anymore to get him to spill whatever the problem was.

Sam stopped at their locker room. Entangling her hands nervously, she waited for Daniel to swipe his key card through the slot, so the door would open, taking the second to steel herself for the possibility that _he_ could still be in there.

The door opened and Sam exhaled relieved. Only Teal'c was present. Thank you.

Sam marched over to her locker to change for the upcoming mission. Again, she felt sadness wipe over her. Sadness that he wasn't here and that she wished him to be, only to remind herself that if he was, they would only remain silent with each other, probably not even looking at the other. Sam was honest enough with herself to see that it was the unexpected, unexplained distance between them that hurt her so thoroughly and she hated that it got to her this much. But whatever she tried, she couldn't undo that fact. The most she managed was achieving to look professional to mask her hurt. And that she would do. She would be the professional he needed. SG-1 was still her family and as much as he annoyed her right now, she still loved the Colonel with her whole heart, so she would do whatever he needed from her.

Buttoning up her BDU jacket and then throwing her protection vest over it, strapping it to her chest, Sam tried to distract herself by listening to Daniel telling Teal'c of the translation program Sam had written. She could hear the archaeologist's pride and excitement out of his voice without needing to look at him and it helped soothing the empty hole that had settled in her chest, refusing to leave her nowadays.

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"Good luck, SG-1, and Godspeed!", General Hammond stated over the intercom, looking down on his flagship team from the control room.

From beneath his cap, Jack looked back at him and gave him a sloppy salute. "Thank you, sir!", he answered and although General Hammond couldn't hear the exact words over the sounds of the blaring alarms and the engaged wormhole waiting patiently to transport SG-1 to their next goal, the General knew the man well enough to decipher his words from the way his lips moved.

He nodded at the Colonel and then watched Daniel Jackson and Teal'c make their way up the ramp. Without hesitating both stepped through the steady event horizon and blinked out of their universe. Major Carter waited for the motionless Colonel, but when he made no move to go, she turned and headed for the wormhole herself, her movements edgy. The General knew his long-time friend's daughter well enough to see immediately that she was pissed. Whatever the problem was Colonel O'Neill and his 2IC seemed to have with each other for some time now, the General was sure they were both in for some _quality time_ with each other on this planet. The Colonel waited another moment, but when Sam was about to go through the event horizon, he followed her. Shortly after her, he stepped into the wormhole. Another second later the wormhole disengaged and the alarms shut off automatically. Almost deafening, familiar silence settled over the control room.

The General smiled to himself, while listening absentmindedly to Chief Master Sergeant Harriman reporting that SG-1 had reached their destination. He'd given them as much time as he could on this mission in the hopes that Jack and Sam got their shit together and made up. And, to be honest, General Hammond still hoped Doctor Jackson would stumble upon something worth excavating and analyzing thoroughly, just so he had an excuse to ban his 2IC with his lead astrophysicist on that planet a bit longer. Because knowing the stubbornness both officers were legendary for they would probably need more than four days…

So General Hammond was more than confused, when the sirens blared out only a day later, accompanied by Sergeant Harriman's voice announcing " _Unscheduled off-world activation!_ ".

Rushing from his office, the General took two steps at a time, before he strode up to the Chief Master Sergeant, demanding to know what was wrong. None of his teams off-world were scheduled to return today!

"Receiving identification code, sir.", Harriman reported dutifully, his eyes glued to the monitors in front of him. "It's… SG-1, sir…?"

General Hammond almost rolled his eyes. What could be the problem now?

"Open the iris!", he ordered habitually, before heading for the 'Gate room.

The moment the heavy material of the iris slid back from the shimmering event horizon and the General arrived in the 'Gate room, two familiar figures almost shot out of the wormhole. Rushing down the ramp, Daniel Jackson and Teal'c stopped in front of General Hammond, the archaeologist leaning forwards to stem his palms against his knees, panting heavily. Even Teal'c seemed as out of breath as the General had ever seen the large Jaffa.

"Gentlemen. I thought I said to report, not to return all 24 hours…?", General Hammond drawled in his Texan accent.

Daniel Jackson straightened up. "General, we have a problem!", he stated breathless, trying at once to speak and breathe.

The General raised an eyebrow inquisitively, but the linguist seemed unable to continue. He waved at Teal'c to take over and the silent man complied.

"Six hours ago we lost contact with O'Neill and Major Carter.", Teal'c reported.

The General looked up surprised. They… what?!

"O'Neill and Major Carter have been scouting the perimeters, when they vanished. We tried to radio them several times, but I fear we have been unsuccessful in it. We tried to search for them, but their traces ended in the middle of nowhere. Unfortunately I was unable to track them down. So we decided our best course of action would be to return to the SGC and get reinforcements.", the Jaffa explained calmly.

Daniel Jackson continued, holding his side with a pained expression: "We hurried back as fast as we could, running almost all the way back to the Stargate…!"

The General nodded grimly, catching the gist of what happened. "Doctor Jackson, get yourself checked out in the infirmary. I'll put a team together to return to P3T-643 to search for the Colonel and the Major."

"General…!", Teal'c and Daniel immediately interjected simultaneously.

The General made them halt with a gesture. "Yes, I know.", he said. "You'll both be included."

Both men nodded relieved and then they left for the infirmary, Teal'c accompanying the exhausted Daniel. Sighing, the General returned to his office, going through his teams in his head to decide which one to send. Obviously, Teal'c and Daniel had to go, because, aside from the fact that they were the only ones with firsthand experience of this planet, _nothing_ would hold them here if their friends were in possible dangers, least of all his orders, but who would be best to send with them?

Picking up his phone, the General pressed a few buttons and listened to the ringtone in line, before…

"Colonel Reynolds? Yeah, I have a mission for SG-3. Come to my office immediately.", the General ordered, his gaze absentmindedly sweeping over his office, until his eyes finally stopped on the Stargate map adorning the window of his office that went out to the briefing room. And while the General listened to Reynolds' voice answer something on the other end of the line, his thoughts wandered to the two officers gone missing: Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter. Suppressing a sigh, the General wondered, what could have happened to the two of them. And if they were okay. He sincerely hoped it.

* * *

 _A/N: So, a little introduction to the story. Hope you liked it. Updates will be around once a week._


	2. Happening

_A big thank you to all reviewers, followers and readers!_

 _And now, a little insight to what has happened to Jack and Sam..._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Two – Happening_

Colonel Jack O'Neill turned. Again. He wasn't sure, how often he'd done this particular movement in the last hours, but he was aware that it was over the top. Way over the top. Already the muscles in his shoulders burned from the constant swiveling and his neck ached from rotating.

But the Colonel just couldn't help himself. This planet was seriously giving him the creeps. It was eerily silent. And not the calm, relaxed kind of silence. It was simply silent, because there was nothing there. No signs of human life, no sounds, no animal life, _nothing_ as far as they could tell. They had walked for about five and a half hours until they were in seeing range of the deserted ruins the UAV had found on P3T-643, Daniel ushering them all forwards with untamed archaeological enthusiasm and excitement, and all the while Jack would have expected to see or hear some animals at least, or stumble upon some footprints, but nothing. No bird-like creatures singing in the sky, no crawling whatevers in the underbrush. Nope, nothing. Nada. Zilch. This planet seemed utterly deserted.

Still, Jack couldn't shake off that uncertain, bad feeling the planet was giving him. All the time, wherever they wandered, whatever they did, he felt watched. He felt watched while they made their way through the trees and the underbrush towards the ruins Daniel was incessantly babbling about. He felt watched, while they set up their camp in front of the half-rotten, but still impressive buildings the ruins were made of. He felt watched, while he and Teal'c walked around the ruin's edges, looking for any sign of life left or some possible traps, while Carter set up her equipment and Daniel already crawled all over the ruins in a neck-breaking way that made the Colonel flinch. Jack didn't even have a spare glance left for the ruins that seemed to be – from Daniel's first analysis – the remains of some village. He was so absorbed in this feeling of being watched, he was twisting and turning around ceaselessly, trying to see whatever his brain was making up to be there, but of course, he found nothing.

Still, Jack was sure they were being watched. And not the good kind of watched, like, say, when Carter was unintentionally staring at him, lost in her own thoughts. No, it was the very bad kind of watched, like when you felt your worst enemy breathe down your neck.

Jack was aware that he was the only one picking up on it. Or, perhaps, he was the only one experiencing this strange feeling. Raking his eyes over his group, he routinely took in their doings. Carter had set up her faithful laptop and by the glowing numbers rolling over the screen he could tell she was already running some tests on the village. Daniel was standing next to her, talking in a neck-breaking speed, while gesturing with his hands, pointing towards several spots, where he seemed to have discovered something worth of ranting over it. Which, from Jack's experience, could be anything from a symbol to a sketchy drawing to a piece of clothing to a naquadah-fueled bomb. His friend could find scientific worth in the strangest things, Jack knew. And whatever it was the archaeologist had currently taken an interest in, Carter was the one to suffer through it, but she nodded patiently and whenever Daniel actually stopped to draw in a breath, she interjected with her own ideas.

Not leaving his two teammates out of his sight for even a second, Jack walked further to where he would meet with Teal'c, when he'd finished his round. His grip on his P90 tightened while Jack paced back and forth, unable to find it in himself to stay still. Teal'c came walking from the other side of the ruins, seemingly being at ease here. Jack found it strangely abnormal, given that he was in constant high alert. Normally he could trust on T to be the observant one, often making out potential threats to them, before Jack himself would see them come. But this time his loyal friend seemed to be of the opinion that they were in no greater danger than being bored to death by the ever-green environments and/or Daniel's history lectures. Jack had even asked the Jaffa for his opinion, hoping that his friend had picked up on something strange on the planet he was missing out on that could explain why the planet simply wasn't warming up to Jack, but Teal'c had only looked at him stoically, pointing out that he did not, in any way, see, hear or feel any danger for them coming from this place.

So it was only Jack, who couldn't help but glance over his shoulder every two seconds. He tried to reason with himself that if his Jaffa friend could not detect anything then he was now officially in for a serious case of paranoia, but still all his battle-trained instincts wouldn't ease up on him in the slightest. On the contrary, the longer they stayed, the more his instincts became overwhelming, screaming at him to get away as long as he still could. Repeatedly, Jack shoved the ringing bells into a corner of his mind and tried to ease the stiffness overtaking his body, but the annoying tingling at his neck wouldn't leave him alone. He began gnawing on his cheek to refrain from doing something rash, like, for example, grab his team, abandon their stuff and herd them back to the Stargate. He _would_ have some difficulties explaining that to the General, he mused.

Jack managed to get through two hours of fighting his urges, until he couldn't take it anymore. He knew Daniel would fight tooth and nail to be able to stay and examine those ruins further and Jack really couldn't justify cancelling this mission just because of some feeling.

But he could damn-well ensure that they were as safe here as possible. Walking over to his team that stood staring engrossed at something Daniel pointed out at some house's entrance, Jack announced: "I'm doin' a thorough check on the surroundings."

For a moment he considered the situation and then continued: "Carter, you're with me!"

His 2IC whipped around, looking expectedly perplexed. Yeah, he would have chosen anyone else rather as well given the uncomfortable atmosphere between them nowadays, but she was the only choice he really had. If he had to split up his team, he wanted the experienced fighters contributed equally. So if he went, then Teal'c had to stay. He didn't want to take the Jaffa with him and chance the two scientists to get so engrossed in their work that they would fail to notice some foe sneaking up on them in time. And speaking of said scientists, one of them had to come with him. After all, four eyes saw more than two could. And the only one he could really order to abandon her scientific studies was Carter. Daniel would probably tell him to go to hell before he would leave his work to trudge with Jack through the environment to look for some imagined enemies.

So, Carter it was. To her credit, she didn't even flinch at his order. Calmly she strolled over to her laptop and set it up for further tests, before she geared up. Hands steadily on the P90 strapped to her vest she walked over to where he waited impatiently. Jack shot Teal'c a meaningful gaze, telling him nonverbally to keep an eye on the situation, until they would return and the Jaffa inclined his head in silent agreement.

Then, with large steps, Jack set to the task at hand. With Carter trailing behind him he disappeared in the thick underbrush, intending to circle the ruins in a wide loop so he could assess their safety here.

Silently, they made their way through trees, bushes and undergrowth, Jack's eyes scanning their surroundings with trained accuracy, deciding in the split of a second if there was some potential threat. Still, everything about this planet was as silent as it had been since their arrival. There was nothing to hear in their closer vicinity other than their breathing and the sounds of their combat boots trampling through the thick underbrush. And yet, it still felt all wrong to him.

It took Carter about an hour, until she finally sighed and asked humbly from behind him: "Sir, this would be easier if you told me, what exactly we're looking for."

Jack was silent for a moment, contemplating her question, before answering: "Yeah, Carter, that's the point. I don't exactly know. I just know there's something there."

"Something there?", she echoed, sounding confused.

"You can't feel it?", he inquired.

"Feel what?", she asked back.

"That we're being watched.", he explained curtly.

"Being watched?", she repeated, sounding all but nonplussed.

"Yes, _watched_. As in: someone's observing us.", Jack emphasized, slightly annoyed. Guess, Carter hadn't picked up on it either, had she? Was he the only one realizing it? Or had he finally gone nuts?

For a moment he wondered if she thought it as well when she failed to answer. Continuing on his path, Jack waited a few heartbeats for her to acknowledge what he had said – or call him a nutcase, whatever. But nothing came. Wordlessly, Jack waited some more, giving her time to come up with some diplomatic reply, but she didn't say a thing.

Finally, he couldn't take it anymore.

"Carter?", he asked gruffly.

Again no answer.

Turning, Jack was about to give her a piece of mind for staying silent when her superior officer demanded an answer of her, when he suddenly was presented with an unexpected sight. She wasn't behind him anymore. Actually, she wasn't with him anymore, at all.

"Carter?", he called out, feeling slight panic rise within him, when he got no reaction whatsoever. His eyes jumped over his surroundings, trying to make out the tell-tale patch of blonde hair within the entirely green environment. Nothing. Wherever he looked, nothing.

Cursing under his breath, Jack began to retrace his own steps to search for her. Worry gripped his stomach with iron fists. Carter would never stray from him without asking for permission first. If something would have caught her attention, she would have informed him of it. She would never just wander off on her own. So there had to have happened something to her, he was sure! Cold chills ran over his body at that thought. Jack didn't really want to imagine what could have happened to her on an alien planet they hadn't scouted and assessed for potential threats yet. He really didn't want to, but he couldn't help the thoughts popping up in his head unbidden. He pushed them aside resolutely, focusing on his mission of finding her. Losing his head because of his emotions was a rookie's mistake he certainly wouldn't make.

Suddenly, Jack was presented with the blonde spot he'd searched for. Stomping through some ferns without a care for stealth, he hurried over to where she lay on the grassy ground. She had fallen on her stomach, lying outstretched with her weapons buried under her body. Her arms were lax at her side and from the scratches at her chin and cheeks, Jack could tell she hadn't even tried to intercept her fall. She was lying unmoving, her eyes open, staring straight ahead, but unseeing. Fear sank into his stomach and cold pumped through his veins at seeing her state. Please don't let her be…!

Jack bent over to check on her, when suddenly some jolt shot through his body. For a few seconds electrical tingles raced through his body and then black dots swam in his vision. Jack bit down hard on his teeth and felt his body convulse involuntarily. Trying his hardest to fight to get control back over his body, Jack realized that it had been a trap. What- or whoever had gotten to Carter had used her as bait for him. And he'd walked right into their setup, his worry for Carter clouding his alertness. Shit.

The question was, did they want Carter as well or only him? If he had been their only target, then they would have no reason to assure Carter's well-being. They would have killed her to avoid having a possible eye witness…

Although his whole body had gone numb, Jack could feel himself falling suddenly, but he didn't notice the impact. He only realized he was now level with Carter's eyes, her blue colored iris' he gazed into looking back at him but lacking the usual spark he always found in her eyes. They were blank and unseeing, holding nothing of the woman he knew and cherished.

Groaning, Jack tried to lift himself up or at least reach over to her, but his body failed him. He wanted to check on her, needed to assure himself if she was still alive, but he couldn't. Already, he could feel the darkness pressing down on him.

"Car…ter…!", he whispered with his last strength, before he fell into the unending, dark abyss that loomed at the corner of his consciousness.

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When Jack came to, it was a slow, meticulous fight for consciousness. First it was just a vague feeling of coming awake and it took him some time to be able to willfully feel his body. Everything was fuzzy and he was thoroughly disorientated.

Groaning, Jack tried to open his eyes. He managed on the third attempt. The picture he was presented with though was indistinct at best. Annoyed, Jack tried to kick-start his other senses. Feeling came next. So he could make out that he was lying flat on his back on some warm, but hard underground, feeling some unfamiliar weight all over his body. Then hearing returned, but all he could make out was some vague, dull droning somewhere in the background.

Jack tried to shake his head. He felt like being under water, or rather like under high amounts of morphine. All drugged up. He'd injured himself often and heavy enough over the years that he'd forced the Docs to put him under some pretty severe amounts of pain reducers so he could recuperate. So, yeah, he knew what he was talking about, here!

What the hell had happened, anyway? Why had he been drugged up? Had he injured himself on some mission yet again and forgotten? Mission. Mission… Why did that ring a bell somewhere?

Suddenly, memory returned full-force and Jack forced himself through the hazy fog surrounding his head. The mission! The ruins. The feeling of being watched. SG-1. His friends. Carter injured or possibly…!

Jack struggled to sit up and take in his surroundings, but whatever weight sat on his poor chest only intensified all the more, refusing him any room to move. The monotonous ringing in the background stopped abruptly and for the first time since he'd awoken, Jack realized he might not be alone.

"Carter…? Daniel…? T…?", he slurred, barely audible. Oh, fer cryin' out loud, could someone please remove their power generator from his chest? Forcing open his eyes once more, Jack became instantly aware that it was not their generator that restricted him. Looking himself down, Jack realized that what appeared to be thick, heavy leather bands were wrapped around his chest, stomach, thighs and ankles, binding him tightly. His arms were held against his upper torso, secured under the heavy bands. He was held captive!

Guess, whoever they were, he'd managed to stumble upon the enemy, whose prying eyes he'd felt all along. Great. And while Jack was glad that, apparently, he hadn't gone insane and was imagining things, this really was not the way he would have preferred for this to go down.

Sighing exasperated, Jack took a second to gather up more of his strength. It really shouldn't surprise him, he mused. He'd been held captive often enough to be familiar with this situation. He'd been captured by enough foes, on Earth or off-world, to consider it a part of his job, even if one he tried to avoid at all cost. In fact he was familiar enough with it that he was able to hold back the panicky rush of fear his body tried to conjure up in an automatic reaction to the unknown threat he was finding himself in. Jack willed himself to stay calm. It wouldn't help him at all to lose his head. He had to stay focused and concentrate on finding a way out. Look around and try to assess your surroundings, he ordered himself inwardly. He needed to find a weak spot he could explore to get out of this situation.

Jack's eyes shot open once more and this time he was able to see his environment clearly. He was looking at a corner. Or, more accurately, the angle between a wall and the ceiling. Both were dark, so it were only the even darker shadows that made him realize what he was actually staring at. Jack felt the slight urge to pinch the bridge of his nose. Really, combine it with the stench of disinfect and he could have believed himself to be in the SGC's infirmary. But the fact that it was lacking the tell-tale smell of antiseptics told him that he wasn't in the infirmary. Damn it. For the first time in his life Jack would have welcomed the thought of the Napoleonic power monger walking in with one of her ridiculously long needles…

Jack twisted his head to his right side. He was half-lying, half-leaning back upright on what seemed to be a mix of a stretcher and a hard table, tied to it by the thick bands that were effectively restricting his movements. The stretcher (he decided to call it that way) was tilted backwards at a slight angle, set up to stand solid in a position between horizontal and vertical, and was fused to the ground. It was made out of some thick, unyielding material akin to steel that felt rather unfamiliar to Jack.

Jack tried to rock his body back and forth cautiously, trying the hold he was restricted with. His restraints didn't even sway. In contrast they seemed to harden even further when he moved. He was aware that that didn't make any sense, but to him it certainly felt true. The moment he wriggled or moved, the steel-like material beneath him seemed to become harder and the heavy bands crossing over his body tighter, immobilizing him to the point of feeling frozen in place. No luck getting free from that without some help from elsewhere, he concluded.

Jack looked on and realized he was in a room. It wasn't overly large, but certainly much roomier than any cell he'd been held captive in before. Still, it was as much of a cell as all the others had been. The ceiling was low and he couldn't see a single window. The only exit he could make out was a double door across the room, as far away from him as possible. It had no handle or maybe it was opened by some alien technology attached to it he couldn't see, but Jack would bet his cabin that he was closed in and the doors could only be opened from the other side.

Jack inhaled deeply and became suddenly aware of the light flow of air that washed over his face. Air conditioning. Interesting. And not only, because at least he didn't need to worry about air supply. Coupled with the fact that the room he was held in was longer than high, there were no windows and air and light needed to be provided told the experienced warrior that he was underground. Just like in Cheyenne Mountain.

Hm, talk about light… Jack lifted his eyes to look out for the source of lights that enlightened his cell. The lights in the room were dimmed, allowing him only a certain amount of visibility, but they certainly helped him to make out the contours of the alien environment. Jack searched, but he couldn't see any lamps that provided the undoubtedly artificial lights. It seemed to protrude straight from the ceiling. Speaking of the ceiling, Jack noticed faint, colorful spots of light travel over his head. Sometimes there would be a blue spark that raced across the ceiling over him, sometimes it would be a blinking red dot or a green flicker of light. He wondered what that had to mean. He tried to follow the light impulses and realized that they travelled to some bulky shadows stationed all around him. First he thought it to be some kind of wall, but the holes in it and the low humming he'd made out the moment his ears had decided to continue their job led him to believe the bulky shapes were some kind of machines. But for what, he had no clue. Jack watched the colored spots travel to the machines, disappear within them and evoke a faint blinking response in kind. Boy, Carter would have a field day had she been able to analyze those things!

The thought made Jack halt immediately. _Carter!_

Jack shot up an inch, only to feel his restraints practically cut into his flesh. Grunting, he fell back against the hard stretcher beneath him, trying to will those bands to let up on him. And after a moment, they thankfully did. When Jack was finally able to breathe again and sucked in air, another fact filtered into his brain. He was still fully equipped. He could feel the edges of his P90 cut into his chest, his Berretta press into his thigh and his various knives poke him. His heavy protection vest eased the bands' grip on him somewhat, but the innumerable things he'd stuffed in it dug uncomfortably into his upper body. Jack realized he had been strapped to his confinement with all the weapons he possessed still on his body. Huh. That was certainly new. Not that he wanted to complain. Frustratingly, this didn't help him in any way, because after a futile try, Jack realized he couldn't even move his hands the tiny inches he needed to grip one of his weapons, let alone handle them. He was armed to the teeth, but unable to use any of his weapons. He was effectively helpless, even with half the SGC's armory stack available to him. Talk about some irony, here!

Jack snarled frustrated. He waited another second and lastly the bands allowed him enough movement so he could shift his head. He turned it to his left side and immediately felt his entire motions freeze in surprise. His eyes were glued to the unexpected sight and once again, Jack reached out subconsciously, only to get restrained by the highly annoying restrictions all over his body. Carter! She was there, next to him, on a stretcher of her own.

Jack drank in the sight of her, relieved for the shortest moment, until all the unusual details about her filtered in. She was – hopefully – unconscious. Meaning, her eyes were closed and her mouth hung slightly open. Under the dim light and the colored spots flickering over them, her pale complexion looked positively waxen, of an ashy grey with spots of grime, dirt and dried blood staining her normally flawless skin. Her body was strapped to the stretcher with the same bands that restricted him, too. Jack observed the bands running over her chest, stomach, thighs and ankles that kept her against the stretcher beneath her, before he narrowed his eyes, focusing his gaze onto her upper body. Breathe, he ordered her wordlessly, trying to will himself to see her chest rise with the intake of breath. Unfortunately, he did not. And he tried to tell himself that it was just her bulky BDU jacket that hid it from his sight. She just had to be alive. She had to! After all, what would their enemies want with her, if she'd been dead? Dissect her maybe, an internal voice spoke up that Jack so didn't want to hear right now. He knew that, if they had run into an alien species, those aliens could still learn much about them from a corpse, so Carter would still be valuable to them, even if she was dead. Maybe they were even both supposed to be dead and this was an autopsy lab? It surely was a lab, that much Jack could say. Wrong equipment for an infirmary of some sort, he figured, considering the heavy restricts they were literally placed under. And also, why should the aliens shoot them down to nurse them up again afterwards?

Still the thought that, maybe, they had both been supposed to die for another race to gather data on them was unsettling at best. Jack grimaced at the thought of having perhaps 'accidentally' survived while Carter had died, before he felt a sudden rush of anger surge through him. Suddenly he got angry, angry at himself, and forced himself to quash that thought. Carter wasn't dead! She couldn't be!

Jack looked back at her lax, unmoving form that was only held upright by her restraints. Her head had lolled onto her shoulder, her lashes an unsettling dark contrast to her positively white face. Please, be alive, he prayed silently. He was aware that he was clinging to a faint hope, but he couldn't help it. The mere thought of her being strapped down next to him, dead, was hurting him almost physically to the point of being unbearable. Then again, did dead people need to be strapped down…?

"Carter?", he whispered roughly.

She didn't stir.

Cursing, he called out for her once more, louder. Still no reaction whatsoever. Jack gritted his teeth tensely, trying to hold onto what little control he had left of his emotions. He wouldn't allow her to be dead. She couldn't have died on him, here. She couldn't have left him without… Before he could have… When the last thing they'd done was fighting…

So Jack resolutely refused that she could have died. She was unconscious, nothing more!

Looking at her slack face was getting painful, so Jack averted his eyes. His gaze travelled over her dirtied uniform and absentmindedly, he realized that she also had all her weapons with her. Her P90 was pressing into her chest at an awkward angle that had to hurt, but she wasn't acknowledging it in any way. Which couldn't be a good sign.

God, by now Jack seriously regretted he'd ever ordered her to go on this scout with him! He should have gone alone and leave her at their makeshift camp with Daniel and Teal'c… Again, Jack snapped up, but this time careful to only lift his head. Daniel and Teal'c!

He scanned the room quickly, but thoroughly. Neither the archaeologist nor the Jaffa were anywhere to be seen. Which could either mean that they were held elsewhere or that they hadn't been captured in the first place. But seeing that he and Carter were held together, what sense would it make for the enemy to place the other half of his team somewhere else? So Jack seriously hoped that the rest of SG-1 had managed to escape imprisonment, and, perhaps, were already on their way with reinforcements.

The thought managed to soothe Jack somewhat, seeing that it was his only hope so far. He was imprisoned somewhere on an unfamiliar, hostile planet (given that he was still on said planet), had no means whatsoever to rescue himself, couldn't assure himself of his fellow-imprisoned 2IC's well-being and had no idea, if or when the SGC would gain knowledge of their current status.

Well, at least it couldn't get any worse now, could it, he tried to comfort himself.

All of a sudden, the lights above him lit up, illuminating the room with a brightness that had Jack blinking. He heard a scraping sound in the background and assumed that the doors swung open. Undoubtedly to let someone in. Someone that came to check on them. And that was the best case scenario Jack could think of.

Jack gritted his teeth and tried to see something. Every time he had been imprisoned, the moment he had regained consciousness, the moment lights had switched on and the moment someone had entered his cell had been the moment the questioning had begun. Had been the moment he had wished later on he would have failed to come to at.

So Jack steeled himself and waited, careful to school his expression into the mask of void blankness he had perfected in his Special Forces days. He had been in dire situations before. He had gotten out of them before. Somehow. And somehow, he would deal with this, too.

His eyes switched back to Carter for a brief moment. She didn't show any sign that she was aware of what was going on around her. Whether she was unconscious or… _not_ , she was completely oblivious to the situation they were in. And for now, Jack wished for it to stay that way. He had no way of knowing what was to come for them. Maybe it was better for Carter to sit this one out.

Bracing himself, Jack turned back upon hearing footsteps. Here we go, he thought cynically.


	3. Meeting

_Again, big thanks to all reviewers, followers and readers!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Three – Meeting_

" _Sir? UAV's ready for launch._ ", Sergeant Siler reported to General Hammond through the intercom.

The General nodded down to the Technical Sergeant in the 'Gate room standing in front of the closed iris an already established event horizon shimmered behind, before turning to Chief Master Sergeant Walter Harriman, who was sitting in front of him with his hand reaching for the palm scanner that would allow him to open the iris. The General smiled, seeing that he wouldn't even need an order, but he still nodded, when the faithful Sergeant glanced back towards him, assuring himself of the General's assent.

The iris slid back smoothly and General Hammond felt the tension rise in the air, courtesy of the two men standing next to him: Doctor Daniel Jackson and Teal'c. The Jaffa warrior stood unwavering with his hands clasped behind his back, his face unreadable, but Cheyenne Mountain's lead archaeologist was just short of tapping his foot incessantly on the concrete floor, his arms crossed in front of his chest and one of his eyebrows twitching testily. Behind them stood a silent Colonel Reynolds, observing quietly, but concentrated.

General Hammond turned back towards the bullet-proof glass to look down into the 'Gate room, where Sergeant Siler shooed the last techs away wordlessly.

Reaching for the intercom, the General ordered: "Send it off!"

Siler nodded and with a swoosh that could be heard in the control room from the connecting hallway, the UAV shot from its holder, straight into the calm blue event horizon.

"UAV is reaching its destination in… 4… 3… 2… UAV has successfully arrived on P3T-643.", Harriman reported dutifully, his eyes tracking the UAV's data on a computer monitor. Then the Chief Master Sergeant swiveled around in his chair and began tapping at a keyboard. In the meanwhile, Siler came up to them to the control room, halting next to the General, the UAV's remote control firmly in hand.

"UAV is transmitting data. Image and sound are conveyed to the max.", Harriman stated, before pulling up the pictures the aerial vehicle was sending them onto one of the various monitors.

Immediately General Hammond felt crowded. Doctor Jackson and Teal'c were breathing over his shoulder in their attempt to get a look at the transmitted data. The General was pretty sure neither Colonel O'Neill nor Major Carter would be suddenly popping up in front of the UAV and wave hello to them, but it seemed to help their friends, if they could do something, even if it only was to observe the pictures of seemingly endless forests the UAV sent back, so the General let them prevail.

They watched for about twenty minutes while the UAV flew in circles around the Stargate on P3T-643, going in wider and wider loops. Siler maneuvered it expertly, but the only things they could see were trees. Lots and lots of trees. Colonel O'Neill would have loved this, General Hammond thought absentmindedly.

"Is that all?", Doctor Jackson asked with a sharp, impatient edge to his voice.

Harriman let his chair roll over to another display and began tapping on the appendant keyboard. The picture on the monitors changed.

"Doing infra-red scans.", the Chief Master Sergeant reported back.

General Hammond, Daniel Jackson, Teal'c and Colonel Reynolds watched adeptly, when the picture changed to different colors, varying from blue to violet to blackish grey. Every one of them knew that they symbolized cold, reflecting the living plants that produced no heat. Every one of them longed to see a red or yellow spot that would indicate a living being, preferably human-shaped, which would give them any indication where to start searching for the missing Colonel and his 2IC. But no matter how often Sergeant Harriman ran through the data the UAV transmitted, nothing occurred that even remotely resembled what they ached to find.

"They could not be in the Stargate's vicinity anymore.", Colonel Reynold said, when the tension grew heavy beyond words. By now Daniel Jackson's eyes were shooting heated sparkles and Teal'c looked as unamused as a Jaffa could get.

"Possible.", General Hammond agreed.

"Or they could be somewhere, where the UAV can't pick up their heat traces.", Siler contributed.

"Also possible.", the General commented, mulling it over in his head. Then, sighing, he ordered: "Sergeants Siler and Harriman, you will continue the scans. Let's see if we can find a trace of our officers."

General Hammond turned and was not surprised to see Doctor Jackson open his mouth to argue. The General raised a hand to stop the archaeologist in his tracks.

"Colonel Reynolds, assemble your team. Have them geared up in an hour.", the General continued calmly.

"Sir?", Reynolds prompted him, while looking pointedly towards the two working Sergeants.

The General stood confident. "Whether they find something or not, I hereby authorize a search and rescue mission. We don't leave our men back, do we? So SG-3 will embark to P3T-643 in an hour. And take Doctor Jackson and Teal'c with you. They have firsthand knowledge of that planet."

"Yes, sir.", Reynolds confirmed his orders.

General Hammond was not at all astonished when Daniel Jackson and Teal'c had left the control room before Reynolds had even moved. Undoubtedly both would head straight for the locker rooms and the armory and be back in under half an hour to annoy his occupied Sergeants in their work.

General Hammond couldn't suppress the sad smile that crossed his features briefly. Gazing back at the shimmering wormhole that was held open by the UAV's constant data stream they were receiving, the General sincerely hoped he did the right thing in sending his men to that planet. Whatever had gotten hold of Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter had essentially disabled two of his best officers, so he would be foolish to underestimate the threat his team would be up against. Still, General Hammond was aware that if the situation had been reversed, SG-1 would have been the first team to knock on his office's door to demand they were allowed to come to SG-3's help. Within the base, where they were confronted with life-and-death-situations on a daily basis, his men had formed bonds way beyond the usual loyalty and friendship, even within the military. Every single one of them would risk their life for the others. He simply couldn't deny them the right to go back and try to rescue their comrades. And, chain of command aside, General Hammond really wanted his officers back. He knew he was supposed to regard all men and women under his command with the same objectivity, but he couldn't help but differentiate somehow. Jack was a hell of a soldier, capable beyond words, and even though he could be difficult to the point of causing gastric ulcer, General Hammond had fast come to respect the younger man, forming a stable friendship with him. And Sam? Sam was the daughter of one of his best friends. He'd seen her grow into the fine woman she was now. He loved the outstanding woman and the strong soldier she had become almost like another daughter. So there was no way General Hammond was giving either of them up without a decent fight.

"Sir?", Harriman's voice jolted him out of his admittedly slightly unprofessional thoughts. The Sergeants looked at him confused, awaiting further orders since he hadn't left.

The General smiled leniently. "Continue.", he said softly.

And trying his best to not interrupt the two working men, the General settled behind them, occasionally looking at their progress. He had just decided that he would stay. Stay here, until he had overseen the S&R team embark on their mission.

He was not surprised, when forty-five minutes later SG-3, Daniel Jackson and Teal'c stomped into the 'Gate room, all ready to go. The General sent them off and watched, until the wormhole disconnected, before he returned to his office. As much as he hated this part of his job, he knew there was nothing he could do but wait. He had sent his best men. If anyone could find Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, it would be them.

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Jack hated, when he couldn't see, what was going on around him. Especially, when he was in a situation, where he absolutely needed his ability to see. The Colonel squinted his eyes, trying his best to make anything out in the sudden brightness that had flooded his cell. He could hear footsteps drawing nearer and going by the echoes, there was more to come than only one. His eyes adjusted to the light the moment the footsteps stopped. Jack knew by the sound that they had approached him and had probably stopped somewhere near him.

He looked up, his eyes roaming his surroundings carefully, but his body stayed still the whole time. Jack was mildly surprised, when he was presented with human-looking aliens. Actually, he couldn't say what he had expected, but normally, whenever they met civilizations that seemingly had their origins on Earth, they weren't welcomed quite that hostile. As far as Jack could remember, they might have been presented with lots of weapons and antagonism, but normally the people tended to ask questions first and only shoot, when they didn't like their answers. Their similar appearances usually assured enough curiosity that they weren't condemned to be enemies right away. This had to be the first time someone approximately human had confined them without forewarning and certainly without a justified reason.

Jack studied the aliens closely. They certainly looked human. Their whole physique was similar to all the humans traipsing around the galaxies. And then again, it was… not. They were short. Shorter than him and also shorter than Carter. Probably even shorter than the Napoleonic power monger, even if not by much. If it had been only one Jack wouldn't have thought it strange, but he counted six aliens and all had about the same height, so it had to be something specific of their race. And they were thin. No, not only thin, but downright skinny. Their bodies seemed to be straight lines, so that it was actually hard to tell the females apart from the males. They all wore some kind of full body suit that covered them from head to toe, only leaving their faces free. The suits had varying colors, but all looked pale, which came from the thick and thin white lines that ran all over the suits. The lines originated from the head piece and curved all around the alien's bodies, leaving no area uncovered. Jack wondered, if that was only a fashion trend (maybe those people liked to look that stupid) or if those suits actually served some purpose. Maybe it was a sign of the work they did just like the military uniforms or the coats of scientists and doctors on Earth…

Jack watched as the aliens shuffled to stand behind the machines he had discovered earlier. Intently they studied whatever the machines told them and then one of them reached forwards, laying its fingers on one of the machine's monitor. The alien roamed its fingers over the display, obviously handling the machine in some way, but Jack couldn't see any buttons or a keyboard. How did they command the machines? By touch?

The alien said something to the others and then they began to discuss. Jack tried to pick up some words, but although he had knowledge of some languages (not as many as Daniel, though) he didn't understand a thing. Whatever those aliens were speaking it either was an unknown language to him or they used a language they hadn't yet encountered during their trips around the galaxies. Great, Jack thought sarcastically. This probably didn't leave him with any possibility to communicate with them. Suddenly, Jack wished for Daniel to be here with them. His talent for languages would come in handy, right now. How exactly did other SG teams deal without a Daniel of their own…? Jack decided to ask Lou or Albert. Well, given he would get out of this.

One of the aliens looked up, first studying Carter and then its eyes fell onto Jack. Jack locked gazes with the tiny human-wannabe and impulsively decided that he didn't like their eyes. All their irises were of a dull, unresponsive grey with a detached gaze and even when the alien's eyes widened in obvious surprise upon seeing him awake, the expression in its eyes didn't change at all.

The alien, who wore a pale red suit, said something in a sharp voice to the others and suddenly Jack found himself scrutinized by the gloomy stare of six pairs of eyes. Jack held their eyes, refusing to let them intimidate him somehow. He never looked away from danger. It was a trait that often got him in more trouble than it was worth, but it was so downright him that he couldn't help it. He had always looked his captors in the eyes and remembered as much details of them as he could. So that, whenever he decided to go after them after being freed, he knew exactly, who he was looking for. And, maybe, he liked that they always were disturbed by it. They were used to their prisoners submitting, surrendering and yielding. They were used to breaking spirits. But Jack had never let anyone break his. Whatever they had done to him, he had held onto his sanity stubbornly and mostly came out of his imprisonments the same as he'd gone into them. A fact that made him vastly successful in black ops.

So Jack gazed back with a blank, but menacing stare and was surprised to see one or two of the aliens step back when hit with the full force of his threatening glare. Interesting. Somehow Jack got the indistinct impression that those aliens weren't the equivalent of the military force he had expected to come and interrogate him. Actually he found them most comparable to Earth's scientists. The uncomfortable squirming one or two of them showed under his unyielding stare reminded him much of the reactions his glare would evoke in Felger, Lee and their kind.

The red one said something, staring back at him in what Jack would have guessed to be a curious way. It was hard to tell, because those aliens didn't show that many facial expressions. Their glances and faces remained blank most of the time, so Jack had to go by the tiny hints, the sparse body language and the tone in which they spoke. It took the red one another try before Jack even realized it had spoken to him. The Colonel snorted amused.

"Sorry, buddy, but I have _no_ idea what you're talking about.", he answered with a mocking voice. "Change channels and maybe we're getting somewhere."

Now the aliens were staring back at him in an obviously surprised manner. It was so visible, even for Jack, that he mused that the human equivalent of their gaze had to be standing there with one's mouth hanging open. Widely.

What? Had they not expected him to answer? Or were they astonished that he spoke in another language?

One of the machines began beeping softly, ripping the transfixed aliens out of their trance and set them back into motion. Obviously the machine had been working on something and Jack guessed it to be his words. The aliens all jumped to get a look at the machine's display. Apparently they really hadn't expected any answer from him and were beyond curious what a species like him could have said. At least that was what Jack believed to read from their behavior.

The machine finished with a soft hum and one of the aliens that Jack thought to be a female in a light blue overall looked at the results. At a harsh snap from the red one, it shook its head dejectedly and Jack guessed that their computer or whatever-the-hell this machine was, was also unable to decipher his language. So they really had no means of communication.

The aliens began whispering to each other, shooting him uncertain glances, as if they were unsure, if he could understand them. Jack stared back at them threateningly, just for good measure.

Finally the red one ended the discussion with something akin to a snarl and Jack immediately knew that who- or whatever they were, scientists or military or even civilians, the red one was the highest ranking, the one who gave the orders. The one who was responsible and therefore the one Jack had to have a careful eye on.

The red one growled something and instantly a green clad alien jumped forwards, its fingers moving over another machine's display. In response something behind Jack began humming and the Colonel felt his stomach churn. Uneasily he tried looking behind him, but his restraints prevented that. But out of the corner of his eyes he made out a movement and his head shot over towards Carter. From behind her stretcher a little machine had risen and was now automatically pushed over towards her. Jack couldn't help the subconscious jerk his body did upon seeing her confronted with an unknown alien technology that could do inconceivable things to her, but again it didn't do him any good, because his restraints just kept digging harder into his torso. But soon his focus was led elsewhere and he had to avert his attention from her, because an identical machine was lowered over him, too. Jack stared up at the unfamiliar, small machine daring it silently with his gaze to do something to him. The machine was unimpressed however, doing its job stoically as it had been commanded. It moved down his body, staying at a certain distance and emitting a sickeningly green light that his body was bathed in section by section.

When the machine receded after a few minutes, Jack's gaze immediately shot over to Carter. She appeared unharmed and still lay in the same position she had been in before. Seemingly she hadn't even realized what had happened to her. Biting back a frustrated growl, Jack turned his head and looked over to the aliens, who were gushing over the monitor the green one stood in front of, typing away.

Jack wasn't stupid despite what was commonly believed. He was quite intelligent and a terrific observer. And his career in Special Forces had only enhanced these traits. So he could make out a lot from what others would see as casual behavior. And being military Jack had been in enough examinations to know one, when he was presented with one. So he knew what he had just undergone. They had examined him and Carter. Scanned them. Quite thoroughly, probably. Jack gnawed on his lip in thought. He was afraid that to an alien race such an examination would have revealed much more than a simple interrogation could have. Because he could have resisted an interrogation, but he hadn't been able to do anything against this examination. And he didn't need a wide imagination to picture what another race could learn about them from some body scans.

Jack observed the aliens closely, trying to make out what they had discovered about them. Whatever it was they had scanned him and Carter for, they seemed quite surprised by the results. They were chattering fast, pointing at things he couldn't see from his point of view. But the fact alone that they were pouring over the results in the way Carter was lighting up when presented with a foreign weapon or power generator she could reverse engineer made a sinking feeling sprout in his stomach. Whatever they had found, Jack was fairly sure it wouldn't bode well for them. Normally, whatever made your enemy happy, would devastate you at some point.

And yes, just to prove him right, Jack saw another machine come for him, when the red clad alien commanded the green one to give in some order to what Jack silently deemed the medical computer, because it had been processing the scans.

The new machine headed his way stopped right above his chest and two red light beams appeared, flickering over his BDUs sleeves right under his shoulders. Mini-laser, Jack realized, when he saw the material of his clothes get cut through and then slide down to pool around his wrists due to his half leaned upright position. The laser shut down when Jack's arms were bared, leaving them thankfully unharmed, and then something appeared on the machine's left side that seemed universally alike wherever Jack went and simultaneously was one of the few things that Colonel Jack O'Neill was afraid of: a needle. Jack squirmed uncomfortably, when the needle came closer to him. He could take it from the Napoleonic power monger, even if only barely. But being subjected to that procedure off-world on an unknown planet by a possibly hostile alien race, he took it as a personal offense. Jack had no chance to escape, he knew that much, but he hated the procedure with vigor before it had even started. Too bad those aliens didn't understand his language, because he surely would have had some quality words for it.

Jack averted his eyes, when the needle drew closer and was rewarded with the sight of Carter having to undergo the same procedure, her cut off sleeves dangling over her lax hands, while the machine approached one of her arms with an identical needle. This really didn't help his case, Jack mused. In contrast, it only heightened his anger. He looked back towards the needle that now approached his arm. He felt the stinging, but gave no indication to the pain he felt. It wasn't really as painful as uncomfortable, it was the thought of having his privacy and his body invaded by an enemy that made it that repulsing for Jack.

That, and the little fact that they were subjecting Carter to the same procedure, as well. Fortunately (or unfortunately, it really depended on the perspective) Jack had been held captive with teammates before, and even with Carter. So the righteous anger he felt upon seeing her mistreated was at least somehow familiar and didn't come unexpected. Still, Jack was plainly aware that having his 2IC here with him changed much for him. He had been imprisoned before and when he was alone, he could cope. It certainly wasn't pleasant, _far_ from that, but he would get by, somehow. However, as soon as a team member of him was with him, Jack knew that he was way more vulnerable. He didn't fear for his own well-being, he was prepared to give his life for his country – and now his planet – if necessary. It came with his job. But he couldn't stand for his friends to get hurt. So whenever a teammate was captured alongside him, Jack was acutely aware that he was more susceptible to threats. He _would_ spill a few things if it meant he could get his men out of harm's way, he was pretty sure of it. And he _would_ condemn them to death, if he felt he would endanger his world's safety by the information he would have to give away. And Jack liked neither. He didn't like conceding to the enemy, he didn't like giving vital information out and he didn't like seeing his men get hurt just to make him spill some of Earth's secrets. And he especially hated the thought that he would sign his men's death sentence, if he would need to remain silent to ensure their planet's safety. Yes, being imprisoned with a member of his team sucked big time. Jack would rather do it ten times over on his own.

And being held captive with Carter was infinitely worse. Because she was the person Jack couldn't see suffer the most. He knew that she was military as well and was prepared and trained for such situations. Still, it didn't diminish the fact that he couldn't see her getting hurt. At all. He bled for her every time she would try to stifle a scream. They had been through this often enough for him to know. And Jack was familiar enough with the fits of hate and anger as well as the urges to exact a painful revenge on her behalf to know that his own sanity was endangered the most when she was in danger. Whenever Jack was imprisoned with her, he had to have a strict hold on his emotions or the situation had the potential to become disastrous quickly. Normally, when they were abducted off-world it was with all of SG-1 and Jack would be somehow distracted by trying to ensure his whole team's safety, but this time Daniel and Teal'c weren't with them and seeing that Jack didn't really care about his own safety as much as he probably should, he could worry about Carter all he wanted.

Knowing all that, Jack diverted his attention away from Carter and tried to focus on his own problems. He didn't want to give his enemy any clues towards their relationship and he didn't want his control to slip already. So he glued his eyes to the needle that had broken skin in the hollow of his elbow. By this time, the needle drew back and Jack saw that it had taken a sample of his blood. Jack bit back a curse. He didn't need to be a doctor to know what would follow. The machine would transmit the blood sample to the computer and _badda-bing_ those aliens would know even more about the human race. Great.

Suppressing a sigh, Jack watched the aliens study his bloodwork intently, heatedly discussing this fact or that they had noticed, before repeating the whole process with Carter's blood.

Finally, when Jack began to grow tired of the whole situation, the aliens seemed to gather the obtained data and moved out of his cell, one by one. Only the red one and the green one stayed back. Jack watched them, listening when the red one gave another order. By now, Jack believed the green one to be a doctor or something alike, because it was the one performing all the medical investigations. Upon being ordered, the green one typed an order onto the computers display and another needle approached Jack. The Colonel scowled hateful at the tiny, innocent object, when it pierced the skin on his upper arm, adding another tiny hole to the previous one that left a fine trail of blood flowing down his arm. This time Jack could clearly feel that something was injected into his body and in a sudden fit of dread he sincerely hoped it wasn't any kind of poison.

Immediately, Jack felt his senses swim and his head grow fuzzy. His body turned into a strange mix of wobbly mud and strained stiffness, at the same time being all boneless and bow-string tight. Try as he might, Jack didn't manage to hold onto his consciousness, even with all his stubbornness dedicated to this task. Jack felt himself slip away and through the hazy cloud enveloping his brain he asked himself if they were righting the mistake they had done by leaving him alive. Maybe he hadn't been meant to survive the first blow after all.

His head fell to the side and his body went completely lax. Jack's eyes fell onto Carter's still unmoving form. Well, he mused blurrily, still aware in some corner of his head that this could as well be his last thought, at least when they put him down now he wouldn't be the only one to have survived. He would share Carter's fate.

Strangely, that thought soothed him somehow.

Then darkness surrounded him once more, taking him away.


	4. Holding out

_Again, big thanks to all reviewers, followers and reader!_

 _A little random note: I know there isn't much happening until now, but I need to get the setting of the story straight first, before we can fully dive into it. But we're slowly going to pick up the pace, I promise. So I hope you'll stick with the story and me, and enjoy._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Four – Holding out_

General Hammond was in the control room with the first signs of the blaring alarms, startling the poor Walter, who had been about to page him.

"Sir, Colonel Reynolds is reporting.", the Chief Master Sergeant stated upon seeing SG-3's IDC pop up on the computer display.

General Hammond nodded. He had been awaiting the check-in for the last five minutes and was glad that he was finally released from his nowadays constant state of worry. He had asked himself countless times, if it had been the right thing to do to send another team to the planet that had practically swallowed two of his best officers. Still, those were the decisions expected of a man in his position, he knew.

The General leaned forwards and was greeted with the picture of Reynolds appearing on the monitors. The Colonel was crouching in front of the MALP's camera, his combat helmet obscuring the view of his face. When it had become obvious that SG-3 would be in for a longer search on P3T-643, Reynolds' team had sent the UAV back and ordered a MALP with which they could check in with the SGC regularly.

"This is General Hammond. Speak, Colonel.", the General ordered softly.

" _Sir, we have finished our first searches._ ", Reynolds reported, his voice crackling with the static.

The General nodded. "Did you find anything?"

Reynolds exhaled visibly. " _Unfortunately… no, sir._ ", he said, evidently unhappy with the fact. " _No trace of Colonel O'Neill or Major Carter. No trace of anything, to be precise. This planet seems to be utterly deserted…_ "

The General almost sighed, but he held the automatic reaction back. "I see.", he answered, deliberately letting confidence and trust seep into his voice. He was their CO after all, so it was his task to keep the morale high.

Reynolds continued. " _We're setting up for the second round. Teal'c is trying to relocate the traces he followed before._ "

"Alright.", the General conceded. "Continue. And keep us informed. Next check-in in twelve hours."

" _Yes, sir._ ", Reynolds confirmed. And with that the wormhole disengaged.

The General stood thinking for a moment, ignoring the curious looks Harriman shot him from time to time. Somehow the General couldn't help the bad feeling that kept nagging him. Normally, he would now seek out his 2IC and ask him about his thoughts, because there really was no one with a more astute gut instinct than Jack O'Neill. The man had almost foreseeing abilities. But yeah, no chance of that, because his trustworthy 2IC had gone MIA. Again. And just to make it easier on the General, he'd taken his best astrophysicist with him, who, by the way, had built half of their equipment on her own and was a key asset to the Stargate Program…

General Hammond sighed and returned to his office. While walking, however, he went through his SG teams in his head, recalling where each team was right now. If he was correct, he still had a few possibilities to reinforce SG-3. He would check, just to be prepared. Because, after all, better safe than sorry.

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When Jack awoke, it was with a surprisingly clear head. He had been swimming at the edge of consciousness for some time, but he had failed to break through completely. So when he finally managed, his whole body doing an unintentional jerk, and was restricted instantly, memory of what had happened returned immediately and full-force. He'd gone MIA with Carter on SG-1's last mission and had ended up as a lab rat for an unknown alien species. Talk about luck…

Evening out his breath, Jack listened closely, but couldn't pick up any sounds. Opening one of his eyes the tiniest bit he did a quick search of his surroundings, only to find his cell illuminated, but empty.

Jack wondered. How long had he been out? He remembered being pretty sure that he was about to be killed, but apparently, he'd only been drugged to make him fall unconscious. He had no idea why, but the thought of being still alive made worrying about that fact pretty superfluous. He didn't care why, he'd take what he would get in this situation.

Jack squirmed automatically, testing the hold of the heavy bands across him once more. Yup, still no getting anywhere. This sucked!

"Sir?", a familiar voice said suddenly into the complete silence. Jack knew this voice by heart, so his head had snapped to the side and his eyes settled on her face, before his head had even supplied who it actually belonged to.

"Carter…!", he rasped hoarsely, relieved beyond words. She was alive! Looking ruffled, but alive.

His eyes roamed over her face, taking in every little detail about her. She had dark circles under her eyes and looked beat, but was gazing back at him steadily. Her large, blue eyes settled on him across the little distance between them were the most beautiful thing he'd seen for some time, Jack decided. They were open and sparkling once more, looking as Carter-like as they should.

Jack got taken by surprise with the intense urge to reach out his hand and touch her face only to reassure himself that she was warm and unharmed and he wasn't dreaming this up, but although she was only about two or three feet away from him, he couldn't move at all. So he held her gaze, aware that he was probably offering more insight to his worry than he normally would have given the circumstances, but he couldn't help himself. Thank god, she was still alive! _Thank god_.

She blinked under his intense stare and he could see confusion spread on her expression.

"Sir…?", her voice asked humbly. "Are you alright?"

Was he? He still felt a bit fuzzy and disorientated, but he could remember everything and she was still alive, so yes, he probably was as alright as he could get in this situation. He nodded.

"What about you?", he inquired, his voice still croaking as if he hadn't used it in days. How long had he been out?

She nodded back, copying his movement and used to their conversations without words, he knew immediately, what she was telling him. As fine as she would get in this situation. Just like him.

"Any idea, where we are?", she asked.

Jack observed her for a moment, before answering. She appeared calm and collected with no visible hints of fear in her body language. He understood. Just as he had done uncountable times before when in dire situations, she had retreated into her military persona, allowing training to take over to get her out of her miserable situation. And just as he had trained her to do, she was assessing her situation, trying to find out, where they were and what advantages they still had that could work for them. Trying to find out, what they could still do. She hadn't given up (of course, she was Carter after all) and was probably running through various ideas in her head how to escape.

He shrugged. "As far as I can tell, in an underground facility. Possibly still on P3- _whatever_."

Her eyes roamed their surroundings and he could see her pick out the give-away signs he had already noticed. Artificial light and air conditioning. Low ceilings and wide rooms without any windows. And he saw her coming to the same conclusion, agreeing with him silently.

"This could probably be, why we thought the planet to be deserted.", she whispered, the scientist Doctor Carter appearing for a moment from under her military persona. "If they live completely underground…"

Jack wanted to shrug, but his movements were seriously limited with the restraints placed all over his body. "Well, the planet couldn't be all deserted.", he interjected. "Someone has captured us, after all."

He could hear the sarcasm almost drip from his voice, but she didn't visibly react to it in any way. Her gaze was unfocused, but concentrated, which told him that she was thinking a few things through. He waited, watching her, while imagining the gears turn and intertwine in her head. When it became apparent she wasn't offering any magical solution to him in the near time, he supposed she needed more information.

"I saw them.", he said.

Immediately she looked to him, sharp eyes locking with his.

"The enemy?", she asked, intrigued.

He nodded, one of the few bodily movements he still could do. "They're human.", he explained, before amending: "Well, mostly."

Carter's eyebrows rose as if she hadn't expected that. "Human?"

Well, Jack couldn't really be sure without the Napoleonic power monger doing some DNA tests on them, but yes, in his opinion, they came close enough.

Carter studied his expression and seemed to understand.

"I see.", she concluded. "That's rather… surprising."

Who was she telling, he agreed inwardly.

"When did you…?", she began, but anticipating her next question, he broke in: "I was awake before. When you were still unconscious. They came, did some scans on us and took blood samples."

Carter gulped uncomfortably and Jack knew she had seen through the problem this could pose instantly. She'd always been the smarter one of them anyways.

And as if on cue, Jack heard the grating sound of the doors to their cell sliding back. With almost identical movements he and Carter turned their heads towards the aliens moving into the room. Jack recognized the red one in the front and the green one trailing in the back, but the others were unfamiliar to him as far as he could distinguish them. Carter's eyes were roving over them, taking in miniscule details and dissecting the gathered information in her head.

The red clad alien stopped in what Jack would have guessed to be surprise when it was presented with both their prisoners awake. The alien scowled displeased and snapped something harsh, causing the green one in the background to duck its head. From the behavior the red one came as close to the interrogator Jack had expected to be confronted with in the first place and so Jack decided then and there that it had to be male.

The green one rushed for the monitor's displays, hacking away on them with Carter's eyes following each movement scrupulously, analyzing their behavior thoroughly. Astonishingly, however, the red one stayed back, standing unmoving with two aliens clad in yellow and one in gray. And at a tell-tale snap of the red's head the two yellows moved forwards. They had large boxes with them, carrying them with strange, edgy movements. They stopped next to Jack and started working, still with the odd, almost robotic movements. Jack noticed they avoided his eyes, when he began narrowing his threatening glare on them. Yup, he still made them uncomfortable.

One of the yellows pulled what appeared to be a thick metal cuff from one of the boxes. The cuff was shaped like a thick band and had holes all around it. Hesitating just the slightest bit, the yellow one stepped closer to him and instantly Jack felt his restraints dig into his body with unusual ferocity. He grunted, now barely able to breathe. The alien reached out and unable to do anything, Jack was left to watch him latch the cuff around his left upper arm. The Colonel tried to squirm, but the restraints only fastened even further, leaving him gasping for air. So he barely noticed another cuff placed around his other arm, bolting shut around his biceps.

Only when the yellow ones stepped back the heavy restrict with which the bands pressed him flat against the stretcher finally eased up, allowing Jack to suck in a greedy breath. He watched, still sidetracked with compensating the lack of oxygen in his body, as cables rose from the ground and tubes lowered from the ceiling. Efficiently, the gray clad alien hooked them up to the cuffs around his arms and Jack couldn't help the feeling of being bound even tighter. He felt restricted to the point of getting panic issues.

Jack scowled at the alien that was giving its all to overlook him. When it was done, the gray one tapped its finger against the cuffs and a low humming told Jack that whatever technology he had been hooked up to had just been activated. Unexpectedly, intense, sharp pain surged through his arms and Jack banged his head back against the stretcher in the automatic jerk his body did. Gritting his teeth to the point of being uncomfortable, his brain provided him with the information that whatever had happened, felt suspiciously like a bunch of needles getting shot into his arms. Which, given his situation, probably wasn't that far off.

Jack rolled his head to the side to relieve the painful pounding spreading in the back of his head only to be presented with the picture of Carter being covered in the same lot of cables and tubes that connected to smaller cuffs that went around her upper arms. Blood trailed from where the cuffs were placed tightly around her arms and her body twitched under her restraints, her head bent back with her eyes closed and her mouth pressed shut tight from the pain she seemed to suffer through. Jack didn't need to be a genius to see that those aliens had subjected her to the rash treatment he had just experienced and, although familiar, the sudden rush of heated anger at seeing her suffering took him by surprise.

Jack growled displeased, loud enough for the aliens to notice and stop in their tracks. All eyes turned towards him, while he kept staring at Carter, willing her to come out of it unharmed. Finally, her body relaxed against the stretcher and her gaze turned to him, slightly unsteady but focused. Reassured in a way, Jack averted his eyes and glared at the aliens. He was aware in a small corner of his mind that he let a bit of his Special Forces dangerousness seep into his glare, probably making his expression downright murderous, but right now he couldn't care less. Jack was angry. And while trying to reign in his feelings to get his much-needed control back, he felt it couldn't hurt to get a warning across of what he could – and would – do, if he managed to get free.

The red alien stared back in a probably affronted way. It really was hard to tell with their sparse facial expressions. Then it said something to the green one and suddenly, Jack felt his whole body erupt in pain. He bit down hard on his teeth to stifle a reflexive scream and fought to keep his eyes open. He saw blue energy dance from the cuffs all over his body and while his head was heavily distracted with pulling through, he still understood that he was being shocked with energy, something akin to electricity, probably in some kind of punishment.

Dimly, Jack heard Carter call out to him with a mixture of shock and surprise. He couldn't answer, though. Jack had been tortured with electricity before, so it wasn't something new to him, but it was still excruciatingly painful.

A startled yelp though made Jack perk up and he understood almost instantly that they had started Carter on it, too. He closed his eyes and tried to block out the sounds, trying to concentrate on himself to hold back the anger he felt. What had _she_ done to deserve this? He could – maybe – understand his treatment, but she was no threat to them right now!

Finally, the energy receded and Jack slumped against the restraints holding him upright. His blood pounded in his ears, but he still managed to single out the harsh puffs of breath coming from Carter in the silence of their cell. So at least she seemed alright, mostly anyways.

Jack looked up just in time to see their captors go, the red alien the last one to leave through the thick doors. Exhausted, the Colonel let himself fall back against the stretcher, trying to will all his hurting body parts to ease up on him a bit. He didn't really understand a thing of what was happening and why, but still, even with his head pounding hard, he understood that by now, they had truly turned into lab rats. They were being experimented on, having to submit to their captor's wills and whims.

Panting, Jack opened his eyes to see the lights dim in their cell, indicating that night was falling. He really hoped the SGC was out there somewhere, looking for them…

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Daniel Jackson stomped through the ruins he had insisted on wanting to study, barely restraining himself from kicking them, just for good measure. He scowled heatedly at the innocent, worn walls of a house, before finally giving in and striking out, banging his boot-clad heel to the weathered stones. It felt surprisingly good, when a portion of the wall caved and crumpled under the force he had used. After all, Daniel supposed it was partly their fault, too, that he was stuck in the situation he was in. It was their fault that they had come to this planet, after all. If it hadn't been for those ruins, he would have never even considered this planet. And see, what had happened? Sam and Jack had gone MIA; had vanished somewhere on this planet. And whatever he tried, Daniel had no way of finding them.

Frustrated, the archaeologist raked a hand through his hair, sure that by now it was sticking out in all directions imaginable.

Three days. Three freakin' days since they had lost contact with Jack and Sam and they had found nothing.

By now, General Hammond had sent SG-13 with Colonel Dixon and SG-15 with Major Pierce to reinforce the unrelenting SG-3 and Colonel Reynolds, who was commanding growing search parties day after day. Sergeant Siler and a few scientists had come from the SGC to do scans and cover more ground in their search with UAVs. And still, they had come up with nothing. Literally.

It was as if Jack and Sam had simply _poofed_ out of existence. And Daniel tried his best to not think about various possibilities that could have had this exact outcome. He had to believe that they were still here, somewhere. That they would find them. That they were still alive and, hopefully, unharmed.

Daniel looked back to the grown camp that rested peacefully between the ruins he was stalking and the way back to the Stargate. He was acutely aware that time was ticking by. How long could General Hammond allow this much personnel to get sidetracked with the search for two officers, even if they were deemed the best in their line of work? Daniel was aware that probably the only reason why they still had this much resources at their disposal was that the loss of Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter posed a certain, high risk to the Earth's security. They weren't only the best, they were possibly the ones with the most knowledge of the Stargate Program and Earth's defenses.

But how long did they still have until the NID would grow tired of wasting money, time and resources on two officers gone MIA? Daniel felt the crawling of time like a dooming cloud wafting over his head, pressing down on him like a heavy burden.

Sighing, the archaeologist lifted his head towards the brilliantly blue sky, only to be reminded of Sam's eyes. Jerking with a sudden rush of overwhelming anger at the unfairness of fate, Daniel kicked the wall once more, getting it to grumble completely, before hurrying off to join the next search party. Reynolds had just ordered him to take a break, but who cared? He could rest, when he was dead. There was no way he was giving up, before he had found his friends!

Rushing to catch up with Teal'c (who wasn't ordered to rest!) and SG-15, who were just leaving camp, Daniel thanked all heavens for the umpteenth time to not be military. Major Pierce might sigh heavily, but he didn't even try to hold Daniel back. Smart guy. Because the archaeologist wasn't willing to give up or give in, anyways.

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Jack awoke from a light doze to the half-darkness of their cell. Groaning he rolled his head in a try to ease the stiffness in his shoulders. He hadn't even noticed he had been about to slip into a slumber, but obviously his body had taken a short time-out. And while Jack wasn't fond of dozing off in a hostile environment, it _had_ done his body some good to recuperate. The pounding in his head had lessened and while the feel of the odd cuffs around his upper arms was still uncomfortable, the burning pain had receded. His arms still felt a bit numb, but that wasn't anything he couldn't ignore.

Jack turned his head to glance over to Carter. She was awake, staring right back at him, but her expression was absentminded, as if she had been looking at him habitually for a long time and had kept herself occupied with thinking, retreating into herself.

"Carter?", he shook her out of it, his voice still beyond anything he had ever heard himself usher.

"Sir!", she gasped, her blue eyes immediately settling on his, her gaze searching, asking him silently about his well-being.

"How long was I out?", he asked, skipping the usual how-are-thou's.

She attempted to shrug. "Hard to tell.", she admitted, referring to the lack of any signs to tell of the passing time.

Still, it had obviously been long enough to make her worry, Jack decided at seeing the concerned look in her big eyes. But that could be about everything from five minutes to five hours, seeing that she usually paid more attention to him and his well-being than he deserved anyways.

"So…", he began, shifting awkwardly so that the barrel of his P90 wasn't digging into his stomach anymore. "Please tell me, you came up with some solution to our situation while I was taking five."

She sighed in a defeated way that already told him anything he needed to know and more.

"Well, sir, I'm sure I could think of a way or two to get us out of here, but I fear, it's useless.", she stated, gnawing on her lower lip, partly in thought and partly in frustration.

"Don't say that!", he ordered gruffly.

She looked back to him and although he had used a rather rough tone, she smiled at him.

"Sir, whatever we could try is based on the premise that we're getting free of these ropes.", she began and motioned with her chin to the bands pressing them to the stretchers. "And whatever I've tried, I can't think of any idea how to lose them."

"Oh, for cryin' out loud.", Jack grumbled. "We're in full possession of all our weapons! We have knives! Why can't we just cut through them?"

He knew her answer, before she actually opened her mouth. "Because, sir, as you've most likely already noticed, the moment we move, those ropes pull together tighter to restrict our movements. We are unable to even reach our knives, let alone handle them."

This was absurd, Jack thought wryly. He had his P90 under his chin and could do nothing! He had three guns strapped to his body, let alone various other kinds of weapons and explosives and he could do naught but watch her get experimented on…!

"Why do you think we still have our weapons, anyways?", he inquired. He really wasn't interested in what was surely a technobabble lecture to follow, but the sound of her voice soothed him and their conversation kept him from cursing fate and bad luck.

"Well, probably because those aliens have no idea what they're for.", Carter said in a total lack of lengthy explanations and multiple-syllable words. "We have our whole equipment still with us, so I assume they didn't know what our tools are used for."

Oh, then the thing digging into his shoulder probably was his radio, Jack mused. He couldn't really lift his head high enough to check. Too bad he couldn't reach the button to press it down and deliver a message. Fate really had a sick sense of humor.

Squirming, Jack tried to twist enough to reach the knife strapped to his thigh. His fingers brushed over the weapon, toying with the Velcro fastener on its sheath. But as much as he tried, he couldn't move enough to open it or even pull the blade from its sheath, let alone think of cutting through his restraints. Cursing, he gave up, when the restraints began cutting off his air supply.

"Sir?", Carter immediately asked concerned.

"'M fine.", he grunted, trying to stay still so that his restricts would loosen up once more.

Carter sighed and silence descended in the room. Jack knew what was about to come. It was a familiar game of waiting for anything to happen, while dreading it at the same time and hoping for their friends to find them. It was the uncertainty of their destinies that came with being in the enemy's hands and having no influence on the events anymore, while praying that some cosmic coincidence would give their team the crucial clue to what actually had happened to them.

But neither Jack nor Sam were stupid. Jack had been left behind before and then his team had had intimate knowledge of his whereabouts and now they had gotten lost _on another planet_ with uncountable possibilities to hide. They hadn't even gotten to scout the perimeters around the Stargate, let alone gain any knowledge of the whole planet. Realistically, Jack knew Daniel and Teal'c had no possibility of finding them. Maybe the SGC had by doing scans, but then again Jack was aware that it was possible they weren't even on P3T-who-the- _fuck_ -cared anymore. They could be anywhere within this galaxy or the next, so their chances to get rescued were slim to non-existent.

"Sir…?", Carter's soft voice cut into his thoughts.

He grunted, indicating he was listening.

"Do you think…", she began, but trailed off mid-sentence, her voice tentative.

"Yes.", he said nonetheless, surprised how confident his voice sounded. "They will find us."

He thought, however, the fact that he wasn't looking at her was a dead give-away, belying his words.

"Sir…", she contradicted immediately, sounding exhausted.

He looked over to her and made sure to hold her eyes, trying to convey his honesty.

"Carter. One way or the other, we'll get out of here.", he stated strongly, his voice confident.

She smiled in an automatic response and nodded. She had understood and she trusted him. Jack had never broken a promise to her. And he didn't intend to start now.

Jack let his eyes roam over her face, taking in all the painstakingly familiar features he always tried to not look too closely at nowadays. She looked exhausted.

"When did you last sleep?", he asked.

She opened her mouth to answer, but he interrupted in time. "Ah! I'm not talkin' about being unconscious!", he clarified and immediately saw her mouth snap shut dejected.

She mulled it over for a moment and then sighed: "Probably before we went on this mission…"

And yeah, that had been when…? Damn it, he couldn't even berate her for it, when he didn't know, how much time had passed!

"Then sleep!", he ordered in his best CO-voice, intent to squish an oncoming argument at the root. To his surprise however she wasn't fighting him. She seemed willing to follow his orders, even if a bit hesitant. Jack exhaled perceptibly, feeling the need to rub the bridge of his nose, while knowing all-too-well he couldn't.

"Carter, we'll be here for a while.", he admitted, hating the thought with surprising vigor. "We need to hold out and for that we need our strength. So we'll do what we'll always do, when on a mission: we sleep in shifts and watch the other's six."

"Yes, sir.", military training ensured she agreed with him and did as she was told.

Jack watched her, while she tried to adjust into a somewhat comfortable position and with a last smile in his direction closed her eyes. Field training made her even out her breath and stilling her body movements which would allow her to slip into sleep easily.

Jack watched, unmoving.

Soon, her head lolled to the side, her mouth parting slightly to the breath fanning in and out regularly. Jack became acutely aware that, while still on a mission gone downhill and captured by hostile aliens that had them strapped down in a lab, she was still breathtakingly beautiful. She was exhausted and wary from the stress her body and mind were put under, but she would always appeal more to him than any high-dressed, well-manicured model.

He admired her strength. She had to suffer under the fear from the unknown and the uncertainty even more than he, because being black-ops he had seen, done and experienced things far worse than she could probably imagine. And, even more, this _had_ to remind her of the incident with Adrian Conrad, which hadn't been that long ago. From the briefings and the reports Jack knew how close it had been then. He could only imagine what horrors she had had to endure then, what she might have had feared then to happen to her. They had never talked about it. Because he had shut her out. He had been frustrated by the effect her disappearance had had on him, even though he had tried to put some distance between them. So he had pushed the task on Daniel to be there for her. Jack had basically drawn back into his shell the moment he had gotten her free and out of harm's way and had trusted on their archaeologist friend to do what was actually Jack's job: make sure his 2IC was fine, physically as well as mentally.

God, thinking about it made it infinitely worse, Jack decided. It felt so substantially wrong to shut her off from him, to push her away and the longer he did it, the bigger grew the need to have her close again. Now, Jack could admit to himself that he had actually been jealous that Daniel had been the one to go through the experience with Carter. Jack might have been the one to come for her, but Daniel had been the one to help her cope. Jack knew Carter tried her hardest to be the battle-hardened, tough soldier in front of him, always striving for him to acknowledge her and her efforts, but, sometime, there had been a time, she had also relied on him in the way she relied on Daniel. Surely, their relationship had always been vastly different from the one she and Daniel had, but honestly, Jack was aware that they had been closer before. There had been a time he had felt he knew her best and she knew him best. And then he had retreated from her for the sake of their careers (okay, mostly _her_ career, because, let's be honest, he was as far as he'd ever get in the Air Force with his attitude).

Jack looked at her features while she slept, drawing strength from the peaceful picture she presented. A slight frown marred her face as if she was solving problems even in her sleep. He wanted to reach over and run a finger over her forehead to even out the single wrinkle that had appeared there. He had even done so once or twice when off-world and sharing a tent with her, before their relationship had begun dancing on some forbidden border and he had come to the conclusion that, essentially, she was way too good for him. So, even if he would be able to reach over towards her right now, Jack knew, he would probably not.

Oh, for cryin' out loud, imprisonment definitely left him with too much time to think, Jack decided. It was a problem he had encountered before. When left to his own with too much time when dealing with a problem, his thoughts could go in circles. Thankfully, he was Jack O'Neill and could just switch off thinking. Normally. Strangely, it had never really worked when Carter was involved. But, also a familiar occurrence when Carter was involved, thinking brought him nowhere. He ended in the same dead end street he had started in with all the restricting walls – _cough_ frat regs _cough_ – still intact.

Sighing, Jack watched the rhythmic rising and falling of her chest with her breathing, which emitted a slight creaking sound when her P90 was pushed against the heavy bands weighing down on her. Seeing her bound and restricted was having a bad effect on his sanity. It went against anything he ever wanted for her. He wanted her to be safe and unharmed. Well, as much as was possible with their jobs. And he swore inwardly that he would get her back into safety, even if it was the last thing he would do!

Aliens be damned, Jack would allow nothing to happen to his 2IC. He would get her out of here, with or without the SGC's help. Because, after all, when Samantha Carter was involved, there was no one more dedicated or determined than Jack O'Neill.


	5. Tumbling

_As usual, thanks to all followers and readers, and especially all reviewers!_

 _Author's note: So, this time, a little insight to how Sam experiences the whole situation. That was overdue._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Five – Tumbling_

Daniel Jackson was pissed off. Seriously pissed off. And he _really_ had a huge amount of patience, proven by uncountable situations dealing with Jack.

Without a care for stealth, subtlety or even the audience they had, the archaeologist strode towards General Hammond standing at the base of the ramp in Cheyenne Mountain's Stargate room the moment he stepped out of the wormhole, Teal'c hot on his heels.

" _Abandoned?!_ ", the linguist yelled infuriated over the blaring alarms and the calm crackling of the engaged wormhole behind them SGC officers were still filtering through, carrying the unbelievable amount of stuff they had used on P3T-643 for the searches.

"What's that supposed to mean?", Daniel demanded to know from the General, not picking up on the baffled faces the SF's standing behind the General adapted upon hearing his tone.

The General sighed heavily. "All search and rescue actions are to be terminated immediately.", he explained with plain sympathy visible in his face.

Daniel halted, still quite fuming but also a bit placated, when he saw that it clearly went against General Hammond's wishes as well.

"On whose orders?", the archaeologist demanded to know irately.

The General said nothing, but motioned behind himself with a curt movement of his head. Daniel looked up to the control room, feeling rather than seeing that Teal'c was doing the same. Up in the control room, staring through the heavy, bulletproof windows down at them stood Senator Kinsey.

"Oh swell!", Daniel almost exploded. With a stormy expression on his face he stomped for the stairs, Teal'c at his side.

The SF at the blast door asked for his weapon and Daniel shoved the weapons he'd used on the S&R mission towards the Airman, Teal'c following his example. The moment they were finished however, Daniel was out of the door, the Jaffa right behind him.

Now, Daniel decided furious, they were going to have a little talk with this slimy weasel of a Senator! And Daniel was fully confident that he could get the Senator to see it _his way_. He wasn't SG-1's linguist for nothing! Aside that he could do it in over twenty known and a few unknown languages, he had the best diplomatic skills on SG-1 and had landed quite a few impressive agreements, even when Jack's boredom-induced slipups had threatened to undermine them! If he could outtalk alien races, then one Senator from Indiana didn't stand a chance! And just for the _slightest_ possibility the man decided to talk back, when Daniel was so beyond any patience and good sense, he figured it couldn't hurt to remind the man that he had – indeed – served under Colonel O'Neill. And predictably picked up a few things from the other man.

Grimly, Daniel glanced over to the very unamused Jaffa walking by his side, who gazed back steadily. Whether the Senator's power hunger liked it or not, nothing was being abandoned, before they hadn't gotten Jack and Sam back! He and Teal'c were personally ensuring it.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Sam stared at the Colonel. Again. Really, there wasn't much else to do. By now she knew every crook in the ceiling by name and even the flashing colorful sparks that travelled along the ceiling in regular intervals were getting boring after a decent while looking at them.

Sam had already made a few assumptions to what those flashes were for. Seeing that they were held in something akin to a laboratory and were experimented on, she had the theory that those sparks were transferring the data the machines around them that the Colonel believed to be computers (and she was leaning towards agreeing with him) picked up on. She had noticed that whenever they spoke or emitted some kind of sound a blue spark was racing over the ceiling and assumed that it was attuned to sound, delivering data about their language to the aliens. The green flashes were being conveyed in regular intervals and Sam had contemplated that, given that the green clad alien seemed to be something akin to a Doctor (another theory of the Colonel she agreed with), those were updates about their health and physical states.

It were the red sparks that had Sam at a loss for a long time. They were by far the ones she saw the most at the ceiling, but there was no pattern to them. They were getting rarer when night fell, indicated by the dimming of the light in their cell, but during the day they had no predictable arrangement. Sometimes she would see them race across the ceiling every few seconds, sometimes she would only see one in a couple of minutes. Sam had quickly theorized that those red sparks were controlled by the aliens from outside their cell. It was the only real explanation to their irregular pattern Sam could think of. What had her stumped was the fact how they could _know_ that there was something interesting about them to analyze. As far as Sam could see, there were no cameras around…

But then she had perked up. What if those red sparks were the cameras…? What if the cameras were hidden in the ceiling and those red sparks were the video-taped data being transmitted to the aliens she imagined sitting in labs similar to her own one in Cheyenne Mountain, studying their behavior on monitors as Sam herself had done innumerable times with the Colonel, when they had had a prisoner in their isolation cells?

Immediately Sam had been sure, this was it. She had thought about telling the Colonel to warn him. She was certain, he wouldn't want to give any information to their enemies and Sam feared that they could make out a lot from even their sparse interaction with each other. She had already had her mouth opened to tell him, when she had changed course on a whim.

Maybe she had been selfish, but she didn't want him to stop interacting with her. She was sure, he would do that immediately, when it prevented their enemies from getting information from them, but for her, the few conversations they had had with each other and his soothing presence were the only things that kept her sane.

Sam remembered the moment vividly she had woken up in this godforsaken cell. She had been presented with light and had felt the restraints over her body, and for a moment she had believed herself to relive her capture by Adrian Conrad in a dream. She had had enough of those dreams where she had thought to wake up in the hospital he had held her in to be familiar with the feeling. Panic had risen, when she had noticed that she couldn't shake herself out of it, because she had already been awake! Her logic mind had stepped in then and had told her that she had managed to get captured once more. And she couldn't even remember they had been confronted with an enemy…!

Sam had clung to her breathing, a calming technique the Colonel had introduced her to, to keep her senses focused, when automatic panic had threatened to overtake her. She had remembered the Colonel talking about having a feeling of being watched and that, together, they had scouted the area around the ruins on P3T-643 Daniel had been dying to analyze. She had remembered following his back through the thick underbrush in search of some possibly hostile aliens she hadn't even noticed. She had even remembered that she had thought – quite sarcastically – that they would probably scare a bird or a squirrel to death that had been following them, when they stirred it up with their P90's raised – and that had been her last thought.

Sam had taken a minute or two then to berate herself for getting sidetracked. She hadn't trusted her CO's feelings and had managed to walk into an alien trap. Well done!

Really, she had served almost five years at the side of Colonel O'Neill and by now, she had come to trust his instincts more than she trusted her faithful scientific tools, because experience over the years had shown her that his instinct was often more accurate than any measurement tool she could build. Sam had been honest enough with herself to admit that she had let herself get clouded by her personal feelings. She had been angry with him. Oh yes, very angry.

They had been so close, they had had an almost instinctive understanding of each other. And then he had gone and changed everything. Sam had noticed the distance he insisted of putting between them. It had started after the incident, where she had been taken over by the alien entity and he had had to shoot her. Sam knew the Colonel well enough to see that he had been feeling guilty and had tried to talk to him. She didn't blame him in the least, because she knew that he had done the only thing possible to save their planet. And she didn't want him to blame himself, so she had tried to tell him. He had shut her out, quite rudely even. She had tried, but he had made it clear that he wasn't willing to talk to her about it. Ever. So Sam had retreated, trying to give him time and space, and had hoped that Daniel had more luck in getting through to him. But whenever she had asked the archaeologist, Daniel had only shaken his head dejectedly, indicating that the Colonel wasn't willing to talk to _anyone_ about it.

They had continued their work smoothly, but Sam had felt the distance to him with great accuracy. Before, they had been so attuned to each other that his unexpected return to the strictly professional work relationship the Air Force demanded of them left Sam almost feeling as if she had been ripped of something elementary. Talk about clichés, she had felt as if half of her heart had been crushed and pain had consumed her every time he had stood next to her in the _appropriate_ distance, refusing to acknowledge her even with a side-glance, or she had been briefing him and had been presented with his blank face, the one she had seen him wear when he was facing alien races he was still skeptical about and was refusing them any indication on his emotional state. Gone was the mischievous, conspiratorial smile he always smirked at her, as if they were sharing a secret no one else knew about. And Sam had felt thoroughly bereft of it. Still felt so, actually.

She had tried everything to get them back to how they'd been before only for him to counteract her. And then Adrian Conrad had happened. Sam had been drugged most of the time in his imprisonment, but she remembered enough. She remembered her drowsiness, the feeling of helplessness, the fear she had tried to ignore and the stubborn spark of hope she had clung to. It had taken her whole military training to manage an escape, only to get captured immediately. Security had been tightened then and any thought of escape had been snuffed by the root together with her belief to get herself out of it somehow. The thing Sam remembered the most, though, was the _sureness_ , her conviction that he would come and get her out of it. Every minute, every second she had fought against Adrian Conrad, his men and his doctors, she had been convinced that he was out there, searching for her. And she'd known he would never give up. Because she wouldn't have, either. Damn the whole distance and the feelings left unspoken, they still were friends, still were family and neither of them would ever leave the other. Sam had always been sure of it.

And she had been right. He had come for her, rescuing her in the last possible moment. Sam could honestly say there hadn't been many times she had been gladder to see the Colonel than then. And when they had returned to Cheyenne Mountain and Janet had practically chained her to the infirmary, he hadn't left her for a second. General Hammond had had to come to the infirmary to get the rundown on what had happened, because he had refused to leave her side. Honestly, Sam had hoped by then that, lastly, everything would return to how it had been before. The moment she had been given the all-clear however, he'd left without a word and the distance between them had been back full-force. Much to her disappointment.

In the days that followed, Sam had caught him times after times he had been staring at her pensively, when he had thought, she hadn't been looking. Again she had waited, hoping he only needed time to come clear with all the things that had happened. But nothing had changed.

And then the anger had taken over. By then, Sam had felt treated thoroughly unfair and she seriously had been about to corner him with her P90 raised, _demanding_ some answers. The only thing that had kept her from doing so was the thought that such an action _could_ be considered a court-martial-able attack on her Commanding Officer. And god forbad they ever engaged in an activity even remotely court-martial-able…!

Still, whatever she had tried, Sam hadn't been able to suppress the anger. Every moment he was obviously ignoring her, she had had to stomp on the urge to storm over, grab him at the collar and give him a good shake, hoping it would install some sense in him.

She should have known that the only thing that could have come out of this situation had to be a catastrophe. She should have known that, by acting like this, they seriously compromised their work. They had been distracted and see, where it had gotten them. In another situation like the one with Adrian Conrad, to which Sam had vowed to herself to never get herself into again.

So, understandably, she had been overtaxed with the situation the moment she had come to in yet another lab. Her very first, uncontrolled reaction had been panic. But then her logical mind and military training had kicked in and she had assessed her situation. She had soon found out that, again, she could do naught to get herself out of it, but, in contrast to her experience with Adrian Conrad, she wasn't alone. The Colonel had been captured with her. If she had to guess, then Sam feared, he had either walked into the trap with her or had been captured because he had tried to help her. Either way, they were stuck together. Which meant that, this time, he couldn't come and rescue her. But Sam had picked up on the fact that neither Teal'c nor Daniel were here, so maybe they hadn't been captured and could come back for them with reinforcements.

But, this time, as much as Sam would have wished for the Colonel to be safe, she at least wasn't alone and that was doing a great deal to keep her calm and sane. If anything, she was in this together with the one person she would go with through _anything_. Who would go through anything with her. The one person in whose presence she felt safe and protected, wherever she was. So although she was confined in another lab to be experimented on, she had felt herself relax the moment she had laid eyes on his unconscious form and had known he was with her. Knowing he was by her side was doing a great deal in calming her down. Actually still did so, now. Whenever their captors came and she wondered about what they would do to them, his calm, collected attitude paired with his very own cocky boldness reassured her tremendously.

Sighing unnoticed, Sam let her eyes rake over him routinely, as she had done uncountable times already since their capture, just to assure herself of his well-being. He was staring at the ceiling, unaware that she had woken up seconds ago. She could only see his left side from her position, but she saw him tapping his fingers against the stretcher beneath him and his foot was whipping restlessly. Those were about the only body parts he could move freely and the Colonel had never been the type to sit still. He normally had already too much spare energy and couldn't stop fidgeting, so Sam was seriously astonished that he had managed to stay so calm even though they had been here for days at least. Sam wasn't entirely sure, how long they had been imprisoned, because she had no knowledge of the time they had spent unconscious and being underground it was hard to follow the passing time.

Sam was ripped from her musings, when one of the tubes that connected with the cuff around the Colonel's left biceps began emitting a soft white light, which, from Sam's experience, meant it had been activated. She wasn't worried, though. She knew that this certain tube was timed to activate around twice a day. Soon a tough, viscous liquid ran down the tube to disappear in the Colonel's vein the tube was connected to by a syringe. Sam didn't have to look to know that the same thing was happening to her, too. She could feel the pressure in her upper arm, where the substance was pressed into her vein to begin its journey through her body. Sam had no means of knowing what it was they fed them, but she suspected it was some kind of nourishment, because, after all, after days without eating and drinking anything, they were still alive. Physically and mentally exhausted, but still alive. In some way.

Being a PhD and therefore evidently smart, Sam knew that was a state that wasn't going to last. Yes, they were being fed with some stuff to keep them alive, but Sam knew this wouldn't work out forever. First of all the human body wasn't made to receive nourishments through the arteries. There was a reason their food had to go through their stomachs first, because there the food was filtered and prepared, before all nutrients were being released into the bloodstream. Sam couldn't be sure, but she was very skeptical if their blood would accept the artificial food. If worst came to worst, their bodies would fight the abnormal, unknown nourishment, much like a disease, and they would be suffering from blood poisoning. And with no way to stop the food from getting into their blood or treat any symptoms, Sam knew they wouldn't stand a chance against any illness.

Then there were other side effects. Their stomachs weren't receiving any food anymore and despite the nourishment they got, they were left _feeling_ hungry. In what Sam estimated to be the past two days her stomach had been cramping from hunger and had given her uncountable painful hours she could pass with nothing but waiting for her stomach to finally lack the energy to continue plaguing her. Sam would have killed for something to eat during this time just to satisfy the urge to eat something. Her body was missing the routine of smelling, touching, chewing and swallowing food and it made some primal part of her brain fear she was starving, which just doubled the feeling of hunger she was suffering under.

And then there was the matter of water. Again, Sam had no idea what was within the stuff they were receiving but seeing that they hadn't died from lack of water yet, there must be some kind of liquid within it that kept their bodies going. What was worrying Sam however was the amount. At the beginning of their imprisonment, Sam had still felt the urge to pee and given that they weren't moving anywhere from their stretchers and they had both been unconscious for uncertain amount of times, they had both lost control over their bladders sometime. It was embarrassing beyond words but there was nothing either of them could do against it. It was highly uncomfortable, but now Sam would have almost preferred the feeling when she had noticed that the urge to have to pee had just stopped sometime. There was only one explanation and that was that her body didn't have enough liquid over to spare. Their bodies were keeping what little liquid they were getting and so the urge to pee downright disappeared. It was scaring Sam. Not only did that mean they weren't getting enough liquids, which endangered their survival, but it also ensured that the toxic substances their bodies filtered out of their circulations weren't being washed from their bodies. Sooner or later they would get poisoned and infected.

And despite knowing all this, there was nothing Sam could do against it. She had had days to think it all through and try to come up with a solution, but essentially they had no way of escaping. They were bound so tightly the only movement they could make at least most of the time was breathing. So all the while knowing that it was just a matter of time until things would turn dire for them, Sam could do nothing but wait for it to happen. It went against her whole fighter mentality, but she really saw no other possibility for them.

Sighing, Sam returned from her useless musings and stretched what her restricts allowed her to move with little movements, trying to get some feeling back into her tired limbs that ached from being forced to stay in the same position for so long. She groaned involuntarily, when the restraints around her body tightened in automatic response, flattening her back against the stretcher she was bound upon. Idly, Sam wondered how long it would take until their muscles would start building back from lack of use and they would get sores from being forced to stay in the same position all the time.

Upon hearing her, the Colonel's head shot around, his eyes levelling on her. "Carter.", he said with his usual voice, which told her that he had to be awake for some time now.

"I'm sorry, sir.", she apologized immediately.

He chuckled and his gaze turned warm, betraying more of his emotions than he had let her see in the last weeks. "'S okay.", he concluded. "You have to sleep, too."

She thought about contradicting, but refrained from it. He was right. Sometime, she had to sleep, too. They had agreed they would take turns in sleeping, the one awake keeping watch, but for some time now (Sam was unsure, how long exactly), their plan had been undermined. The aliens came two or three times a day to experiment. Usually on the Colonel. Sam had no idea, why, but between him and the red clad alien seemed to have developed a quite destructive connection. The Colonel kept staring at the alien with a heated, murderous gaze that Sam was sure had been the very last thing many people had been staring back into. It told of all the things he would do, _when_ he would get free.

And although Sam wasn't good at reading those alien's facial expressions, she noticed the red alien bristling at this much hostility thrown his way. It was usually followed by a punishment, most of the time with electricity or whatever energy they used. The red one had tried different measures, had upped the strength or lengthened the period of time the Colonel was put under the heavy strain, but whatever he did, the Colonel wouldn't stop glaring at him in that foreboding manner.

Sam had once been subjected to the same treatment and remembered the exploding, excruciating pain all too well. She had barely managed to bite back a pained scream, so whenever she saw the Colonel endure all the pain he undoubtedly had to feel with brave and silent stubbornness, she wished for him to just stop messing with their captors, knowing that he had not even the slightest intention to do so, no matter how many punishments he had to undergo. When she had tried to talk him out of it, he had practically ordered her to stay out of it. Sam had no idea, what he intended, so the only thing she could do was trying to trust him. She had quickly caught on to the fact that this wasn't the first time he was presented with this kind of torture, because he could take much more than she could. Sam had been in the military for what seemed all of her life, but she was aware that he had probably seen and done things that made her look like she was still playing in a sandbox.

Still, whenever the Colonel and this red alien were at it, the Colonel would fall unconscious. He would hold out, until the aliens would leave, no matter how long their captors dragged it out. Stubbornly, the Colonel would endure, until he was left alone with her and then he would lose consciousness. And every time Sam took to watching over him, waiting for him to recover. Because that was all she could do for him. She would gaze at his unmoving form, taking in the dark patches of sweat on his clothes and at his temples, the only visible signs he gave to having been in pain, and would try for the umpteenth time to come up with any plan to escape, knowing beforehand that she would be unsuccessful.

So with the spar of willpower the Colonel and their captor had going on, Sam had taken over a lot of the staying-awake-parts, until she had unknowingly dropped, falling asleep while watching over him. She hadn't meant to, hadn't even been aware she was drifting off, but sometime, her body had taken over and had forcefully taken, what she had been denying it: sleep.

"So, how're you doin'?", the Colonel's soft voice asked into her thoughts.

Sam smiled automatically, knowing that it had to be a tired version of her usual grin. "I feel like I should be the one asking you that.", she answered.

He snorted. "Been through worse.", he shrugged it off.

And she knew immediately that it wasn't just a phrase.

Suddenly, with an already familiar swoosh, Sam heard the doors to their cell open and simultaneously with the Colonel she looked over. The red alien strode in with a powerful step that made Sam fear for whatever was to happen. The green clad alien followed, appearing to speak with the red one in hushed tones, but soon it was cut off with an annoyed gesture.

Sam glanced over to the Colonel. He was facing off with the alien once again, but unlike all the other times, the alien didn't seem to mind. In contrast, it was almost as if it was gloating back at the Colonel.

Oh god, Sam thought, paling. They had found out a way to seriously harm the Colonel, she was sure of it! There was no other explanation for the air of success the alien had around him.

Sam opened her mouth to warn the Colonel to be careful, when the red alien suddenly typed an order into the computer's display and completely unexpected, Sam's whole body erupted in pain. Fully taken by surprise she saw the blue cracks of energy dance over her body, before her brain caught up with the immense pain somersaulting through her. She threw her head back involuntarily, banging it hard against the cold metal beneath her, and couldn't stop the pained shout that passed her lips, before she could suppress it. The pain was unbearable, unlike anything she had ever experienced before, the kind of pain that left you wishing to die just to be spared.

Sam gritted her teeth to try and gain control over herself once more, her body twitching and tensing uncontrolled under the strain it was put through. The restraints immediately counteracted her movement and pressed her back. Her body revolted, rearing up against the restrictions, so that soon she was fighting for air.

"CARTER!", she heard the Colonel yelling in a mixture of shock, being taken by surprise as much as she had been, and worry for her.

Desperately she clung to the thought of the Colonel, trying to hold out for him. She concentrated on the sound of his voice, using it to anchor herself in all the pain that left her head spinning wildly. She would go through this and she would come out of it, she tried to tell herself.

Suddenly, thankfully, the pain left her and she slumped against the bands holding her upright.

"Carter!", the Colonel shouted once more.

She tried to straighten up, tried to tell him, she was alright, but it seemed as if her body had been zapped of all her energy. She saw the red alien grinning in triumph, while the green one furiously checked something or the other on their monitors, but that was the last thing she was consciously aware of, before a familiar darkness impended on her.

"Carter…!", she heard his voice one final time, before the looming darkness sucked her in mercilessly.


	6. Falling

_Again, big thanks to all those who follow, read and, of course, review this story!_

 _Little random note: A few commented on my detailed writing. Yes, I am aware I'm being very in depth with this story, but I am trying to create a certain mood and for that, this is necessary. You'll soon see, why. So I hope you'll enjoy it._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Six – Falling_

Daniel stared sullenly through the window of the control room down to the Stargate that stood still and peaceful. His eyes pricked in a tell-tale way and the archaeologist bit down hard on his teeth to refrain from doing… well, anything. Curse, shout, yell, kick something, cry. He couldn't decide what seemed most appropriate right now.

Teal'c and General Hammond stood next to him, both appearing tense as they stared at the _dear_ Senator Kinsey, who had wisely chosen to stand on Harriman's other side, using the Chief Master Sergeant as a protection shield to cover behind from General Hammond's, Teal'c's and Daniel's condemning stares. Although Daniel had the suspicion that Walter Harriman would gladly step aside should he consider jumping at the Senator's throat. And the thought had crossed his mind often enough that he had already contemplated his move and his justification afterwards. Actually, he had already reasoned that no one would miss the Senator anyways, so what if he got _lost_ in a military base… Permanently, of course. Stranger things had happened in Cheyenne Mountain before.

Daniel's biggest problem would probably be Teal'c who would expect him to share and so he would have to leave something over from the high-and-mighty Senator for the Jaffa to eradicate.

"Well, then let's get this on, shall we?" the Senator announced in a false cheery voice that made Daniel stomp down on the urge to strangle the man with all his willpower.

Nobody moved, however.

Sergeant Harriman turned his back to the Senator, looking at General Hammond, waiting for his order. The Senator looked highly crossed, but Daniel couldn't decide if this was because Harriman refused to take orders from him or General Hammond missed out on enforcing the order right away. Smirking in retaliation, Daniel watched the Senator try to get the General to implement the order, even stepping up to him threateningly, before Teal'c intercepted with a well-placed menacing stare and the crossing of his arms in front of his heavily muscled chest.

"General, do I have to remind you of your orders?" the Senator finally fell back on military ranks and structures.

General Hammond's jaw locked tensely, before he lastly looked towards the Senator, acknowledging the man for the first time since he had strode into Cheyenne Mountain half an hour prior as if he owned the place.

"I am fully aware of my orders, thank you very much," the General retorted with such an icy voice that even Daniel recoiled surprised. Apparently, the General was about as furious as the archaeologist was, even if he showed it in a different way. "But this is my base and _when_ I implement my orders is my decision alone!" the General continued, staring the Senator down with all the power and strength of a two-star General.

"Normally, yes," the Senator agreed, waving the General off in a gesture that Daniel thought brave, if the man was still set on some political career. After all, General Hammond still had the President on speed-dial #2. "But this time _I_ am specifically here to oversee those orders being executed and I don't have all day."

"Feel free to return another time," the General shot back.

"Unfortunately, I can't do that," the Senator mock-sighed, while shooting a dramatic look to his wristwatch. "I'm a busy man. And this is a matter of national security that needs immediate tending to!"

Daniel snorted, not even bothering to hide his reaction. The Senator looked over to him, but wisely didn't ask what the archaeologist's problem was. Because Daniel surely would have had more to say to it than the Senator was willing to listen to, anyways.

General Hammond gritted his teeth, but Daniel knew as well as the man himself that there was no getting around the orders. Because he, as well as the General and Teal'c, had all thoroughly checked the presidential stamp the moment Kinsey had thrown the folder marked confidential onto the General's desk. There was no going around the orders. Everyone knew. Still, that didn't mean they had to like it!

"Sir?" Harriman questioned into the silence.

The General turned towards the Sergeant, an unhappy scowl on his face. He nodded and with a heavy sigh Harriman swirled back towards his keyboard, typing in an order for the Stargate's controlling computers to execute.

They all watched the lines of numbers run over the monitor's display and Daniel was hit by the realization that everything they used now had been created or improved by Sam. He shifted stiffly, trying to keep his hold on his raging emotions, before he would do something as stupid as… say… drag Kinsey down into the 'Gate room and pull him through an established wormhole after dialing up this nice, homey planet with those huge, man-eating planets they had discovered not that long ago.

Harriman sighed simultaneously with the computer exhibiting a proud _beep_.

"P3T-643 has successfully been taken off the list of operational planets. All security programs and safety measures are activated and functioning," the Sergeant reported dully.

Daniel ground his teeth together and stuffed his fists into the pockets of his BDUs to refrain from hurling the next monitor in reach for the Senator.

"Continue," the Senator encouraged, an all too large, satisfied smile plastered onto his face.

Again the Chief Master Sergeant turned to General Hammond for confirmation and the General nodded tightly once more. Harriman did his task with professionalism, but his fingers trembled slightly with the emotions he wasn't showing on his face.

It took another minute spent in complete, tense, suffocating silence, until the Chief Master Sergeant stated: "Colonel O'Neill's identification codes have been blocked."

Daniel closed his eyes and held his breath, mentally preparing himself, when the clicking of Harriman's fingers on the keyboard continued and the Sergeant finally added: "Major Carter's identification codes have all been blocked."

Daniel gave in to the urge and reached up to rub his hurting eyes. Great. Just fucking great.

The planet his friends had gone MIA on had been taken off the roster of secured planets, ensuring that, if Jack and Sam would manage to free themselves from whatever misery they had gotten stuck in, security programs would ensure that the iris could not be opened here on Earth, when they dialed back in. Daniel had actually helped Sam install those security programs so that no one could gain access to Cheyenne Mountain from a planet they deemed potentially dangerous to Earth.

And to top it off, all of Sam's and Jack's previous and current identification codes had been nullified, so that, if they would try to return to Earth, no personnel would be allowed to open the iris for them. In fact, security measures would prevent it upon registering their codes. So either way, if Jack and Sam tried to return to Earth, they would sign their own death sentences. If they tried to come back using their codes, they would effectively get smashed against the iris that wouldn't slide back for them.

And try as he might, neither Daniel nor General Hammond had been able to prevent it. Because Jack and Sam were now considered a threat to national security. Their vast knowledge that _could_ (could being a key word here) have traded hands ensured that they had to rule out any possibility for possibly hostile alien races to be successful in using it against Earth. Daniel still thought that Jack and Sam were their biggest chances in defeating any enemy that could have gained knowledge about Earth and its defenses, but unfortunately (and Daniel had never thought he'd hear himself think this particular sentence), the US were a democracy and that meant Daniel as well as General Hammond had found themselves severely outnumbered and overruled by panicking higher-up politicians and military advisors.

So if Jack and Sam ever managed to free themselves from whatever hassle they had run into, they either couldn't return to Earth or would die upon trying. So, put in a nutshell, neither Sam nor Jack could come back, even if they were still alive. Daniel probably wouldn't see his friends again and the SGC had effectively lost his best officers.

"Well done," Senator Kinsey complimented Harriman, who looked about as uncomfortable as he would ever get.

All eyes narrowed on the Senator and none in a friendly way. Daniel saw a suspiciously throbbing vein appear on General Hammond's temple.

"Doctor Jackson, Teal'c, I think it's time you accompany the Senator back to the surface. Since his time is so precious and scarce, he just wanted to leave!" General Hammond stated, still as frosty as before. Daniel assumed the man was just barely holding on. After all, he had just had to make sure a woman he considered something akin to a daughter couldn't ever return to them alive.

Daniel and Teal'c nodded with stony faces, before they stepped up to the Senator and practically marched him out of the control room, each one of them covering one side. The Senator seemed in a way too good mood to feel insulted and that made Daniel gnaw on his cheek to refrain from putting himself in jail for decking a government representative, however enticing that idea seemed.

The blast doors of the control room opened into the hallway to the elevator and the three men stopped dead in their tracks. Surprised Daniel glanced down the normally empty corridor that was now suspiciously crowded. SGC personnel stood scattered throughout the hallway. Daniel recognized Major Ferretti standing close by, talking to Colonel Dixon, and Colonel Reynolds in a conversation with a few scientists, one of them Doctor Balinsky of his own team. Janet Fraiser stood a little way back, clasping a folder to her chest, while she nodded to something Doctor Lee seemed to explain. Major Pierce was there, standing in a corner with Lieutenant Simmons, and further in the back Daniel chanced glances at a few Captains and Majors of other SG teams. The moment however SG-1 had stepped out into the corridor with Senator Kinsey all apparently busy personnel stopped their doings and turned for them, levelling hard stares towards the Senator, who gulped uncomfortably. Daniel almost smirked. Word surely travelled fast through the military base.

Daniel knew all of the assembled were good friends of Colonel O'Neill and/or Major Carter and neither of them had approved of what had just happened. Neither of them said a word, but their condemning stares bored into the Senator with a vigor that even Daniel could feel.

"Daniel Jackson, I think I remember some urgent matter we had to attend to," Teal'c stated in his unimpressed manner, while letting his eyes travel over the gathered base personnel that had come to let the bureaucracy see what they thought of the death sentence that had just been conjured up for the SGC's heroes.

"You know what, Teal'c?" Daniel answered, feeling slightly comforted by the fact that he wasn't the only one, who wished the Senator to hell for what he had done to Jack and Sam. "I think you're right."

And with that the rest of SG-1 left the Senator standing in the corridor to run the gauntlet of his life.

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The next time Sam came awake, it was slow and tedious. It felt as if she had to fight for every inch she managed to creep out of the darkness surrounding her. When she finally felt her eyelids flutter and became aware of her body once again, she felt miserable. Everything, really literally _everything_ hurt. Pain danced through her body in a way that left her wondering if those aliens had, maybe, forgotten to disengage their torture tools. Her body felt heavy and even though she tried, she couldn't move a muscle. Everything felt glued in place as if she was weighted down. Only her head felt strangely lightheaded.

Groaning, Sam forced her eyes to open. Although she was looking onto something undistinguishable dark, Sam felt the picture swim and sway in front of her eyes. Again she concentrated on her breathing to try and get her senses back on track. When it finally worked, she realized that she was looking down onto her protection vest, her nose pressed against her P90. With an almost ridiculous effort she lifted her head to ease her ragged breathing, laying it back against the cool metal beneath her.

"Carter?" the Colonel's voice asked immediately and even though Sam was still disorientated, she could hear the hope shining through this one word.

She shifted her head, so she was able to look at him. She had to blink a few times, until his familiar figure became clear in front of her.

"S-sir…" she croaked with struggle.

"Oh, fer cryin' out loud, Carter!" he sighed. "Don't do that to an old man!"

Honestly, she had no idea, what he was talking about, but habit kicked in eventually, making her rasp out: "You're not old, sir…"

Certainly _she_ felt a lot older, right now possibly about a hundred years or so…

He chuckled humorlessly. His gaze burned into hers, capturing and holding her eyes. "How're you feelin'?" he inquired softly.

"As if I've been run over by a truck. Or two," Sam answered sluggish.

He nodded and Sam could see him run his eyes over her, inspecting her. She thought of asking how long she'd been out, but he probably couldn't tell her anyway, so she stopped herself in time. Instead, she mirrored his actions, looking him up and down. What had happened, while she'd been down? Had they continued to torture him? But Sam couldn't see anything amiss about him and sincerely hoped they had just left him be for the time being.

But then her eyes fell upon the cuffs around his arms. With a sinking feeling travelling for her stomach she noticed that a sickening green-brownish, gooey fluid dripped down one of the tubes, disappearing into the Colonel's arm. Sam swallowed hard, her brain racing with the possibilities of what this… liquid could be. And could do to him.

"Sir…!" she whispered, shocked.

He followed her line of vision and sighed defeated. "Yeah, I know," he admitted.

"Since when…? How long…? What…?" she asked confused, trying to make sense of what was happening.

He smiled tightly, apparently happy she was back to her former self, when she rapidly fired questions at him. "Carter, I have _no_ idea," he cut her short nevertheless.

"Of course, sir," she apologized. He really couldn't know what was happening to them any more than she could.

Still, there was something she wanted to know. Steeling herself in expectation of getting brushed off, when she inquired after his well-being, she inhaled deeply and asked: "Sir, is it… does it hurt?"

He sighed, before averting his eyes to some point next to her. "You tell me," he answered.

Confused, Sam looked to where he was gazing. She almost choked, when she saw a similar fluid flowing down one of the tubes connected to the cuffs around her arms. The only difference she could make out was that the liquid she was receiving had an unnatural pink color. She hadn't even felt something getting distributed to her…

"I see…" Sam trailed off. Somehow, she couldn't help the bad feeling that began nagging her immediately. If Sam had any chance of moving, she would have struggled until she had been able to reach up and rip the tube from her arm, consequences be damned. Just the thought of getting something alien pressed into her body made her sick to the stomach. Who knows what exactly they were receiving here. The artificial food was bad enough, but this stuff? It had the potential to be even more dangerous to their organisms.

Sam leaned her head back and sought out the Colonel's eyes. He looked right back, for once not avoiding her. Neither of them said a word, but both felt the uncertainty and the unclear bad foreboding feeling. So they clung to each other as best as possible, each drawing strength from the presence of the other and the thought that, whatever might happen, they were still in it together…

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Daniel sat staring at the wall of Sam's lab, when Teal'c found him.

"Daniel Jackson?" the large Jaffa inquired calmly, when he entered, his eyes taking in the dusting equipment in the lab.

The linguist looked back at his friend from his place on top of Sam's desk. As well as Jack's office, her lab was exactly like it had been the day they had left for the mission on P3T-643. Not even a sheet of paper was out of place. A few experiments were still waiting patiently for their owner to continue them, dusting slightly in the corners of the lab. And despite the light layer of dust, everything looked to Daniel as if Sam could walk in any moment to continue with her work. As if she had just been on a short break to get herself another cup of coffee…

Daniel nodded to Teal'c, indicating that he was listening.

"Is everything alright?" the Jaffa asked concerned.

Daniel contemplated to give him the standard response he was casually throwing out to anyone, who was asking him nowadays, but Teal'c knew him well enough to see right through him. Hell, Daniel wasn't even fooling the rest anymore.

"Actually, no," Daniel responded honestly, exhaling tiredly.

Teal'c stepped up to him and came to stand in front of him, watching his friend patiently.

Daniel sighed. "I just… I can't just go on, like everyone else does!" he said, frustration evident in his voice.

It had been days, possibly weeks, he had lost count. SG-1 wasn't whole anymore, but until now General Hammond had refrained from assigning new officers to the team. Daniel knew that most officers at the SGC weren't really keen on the positions, the pressure of having to live up to the Stargate Program's legends too much of a task. But General Hammond also wouldn't let Teal'c and Daniel continue on their own without military backup, so they were lent out. Teal'c accompanied every SG team that requested his assistance and Daniel was well fought for, his abilities and skills making the SG team leaders battle themselves, who was to borrow him out first. But Daniel couldn't get accustomed to going through the 'Gate with anyone other than his old team. He knew SG-1 was kinda nonexistent right now, but every time Colonel Reynolds or Colonel Dixon would step up to him off-world he would expect to see Jack staring at him from under the BDU cap, making a sarcastic comment about the time they were wasting with studying _rocks_ , instead of the loyal SGC men trying to adjust their timetables, so he could get more time for his analyzes. He couldn't adjust to the various Lieutenants, Captains or Majors covering his six, when he was used to Teal'c's silent, unnoticeable way. And he couldn't help but sigh in frustration when whatever Doctor he accompanied couldn't catch up with his ideas and translations without having to do a research first. Sam had always understood everything he'd thrown at her immediately.

"Is it…" Daniel cleared his throat. "Is it so wrong to wish for all to go back the way it has been…?"

"It is not," Teal'c assured him.

Daniel looked up, not really convinced.

"O'Neill and Major Carter have not died from what we know, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c reminded him gently. "They are still out there, somewhere, and as long as they are, the slim possibility of rekindling SG-1 is still probable. You can only move forwards, when you can finally come to terms with the past events and that is not possible, while our friends are still alive and out there, perhaps even awaiting our help."

Daniel stared at the Jaffa, agape. To be honest? The guy was right!

Then, his face contorted in pain. "Do you think they are?" he asked Teal'c.

The Jaffa looked at him stoically, not catching on. "Do I think they are what, Daniel Jackson?" he inquired.

"Waiting," Daniel clarified. "Do you think they are waiting for us to come for them?"

The large Jaffa was silent for a while, his dark eyes holding Daniel's.

"I do not know, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c admitted finally. "All I know is that if they had any possibility to return on their own, they would have done so by now."

Daniel nodded. "You're right," he concluded.

Aaaaand now, he was back to feeling guilt-ridden about having to give up the search for their friends. What if Jack and Sam really were waiting for back-up, for their friends to find them and release them from whatever misery had caught them? Daniel was convinced that it had been a mistake to abandon the search and rescue mission, but yeah, unfortunately, he wasn't the one in charge and couldn't do anything about that…

Suddenly, an idea flashed into Daniel's mind. Could he really do nothing anymore? Had he really done all he could? Would he just give up like that and abandon his friends?

No, he couldn't. That just wasn't in his character!

Hopping down from Sam's desk, Daniel strolled towards the door.

"I'm going to search for them!" he stated, looking back at Teal'c over his shoulder. "The SGC might have accepted that they're gone, but I will not!"

Teal'c smiled his knowing grin as if he had expected Daniel to come to this conclusion long ago. "I will accompany you," he said, walking composedly after the archaeologist who was now buzzing with newfound energy.

It was only about fifteen minutes later that Daniel and Teal'c stormed into the 'Gate room, all geared up. Daniel was shouldering a hastily stuffed backpack and had brought his Berretta and a knife, but refrained from taking a P90 with him. Teal'c was carrying his staff weapon.

Daniel swiveled around to gaze up to the stunned Sergeant Harriman, who was monitoring the Stargate controls, Sergeant Siler standing behind him, his mouth half-opened as if he had been mid-sentence. Daniel didn't give them time to think.

"Sergeant, dial up P7G-556!", Daniel yelled urgently. The SF's in the 'Gate room stiffened at the voice he used, obviously expecting a catastrophe to have happened.

Harriman complied automatically, even before he thought of asking why. But Daniel knew it was only thanks to his position on SG-1 and the catastrophes SG-1 had handled through all those years that made the Sergeant obey to his demands, because seeing that Daniel wasn't military and not high ranking he actually had no possibility of making the Chief Master Sergeant do anything.

Nervously, Daniel turned his eyes towards the circling inner ring of the Stargate, watching the chevrons lock one after the other. Faster, he urged inwardly. They wouldn't have that much time, until General Hammond would catch on.

Daniel shot a quick glance back, when the final chevron had encoded and saw General Hammond step up to Harriman to question about the events unfolding.

"Let's go, Teal'c!" Daniel urged and together the friends sprinted up the ramp, throwing themselves into the stable, shimmering event horizon, before either Harriman or General Hammond could catch up with their actions and disengage the wormhole.

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Again. Sam watched sharply. This time she was sure, no matter what he might say!

"Sir…?" she asked, observing the Colonel closely. His head was hanging low over his chest and his eyes were closed. His whole body was tense and his fists were clenched tight with enough force to let his knuckles turn white. The material his restraints were made of creaked slightly from time to time, which told Sam that the bands were working against him, restricting him although he seemed to do nothing.

She got no answer. Bad sign, she deduced.

"Colonel?" she tried anew, feeling worry rise within her.

He didn't even move. He stayed as still as she had never seen him before. By now Sam was close to panicking. She _knew_ he was awake! They had just talked with each other. Okay, not really talked – when did they ever – but he'd just come awake and they had exchanged the obligatory how-are-you's as they always did, trying to reassure themselves they were still alright. And then, completely unexpected, he'd gone still. For a moment Sam had thought him to think something through, but when he gave no indication whatsoever that he was still with her, she began worrying.

"Col–" she started once more, only to interrupt herself mid-word.

All of a sudden he grunted and it was the first sound of pain Sam had heard him utter since they had been imprisoned. Sam's eyes roamed over him, trying to make out what was wrong. Now, she could make out tiny spasms racking his body, leaving his muscles twitching under the restraints of the bands keeping him immobile. It looked like a miniature seizure and now Sam really began to worry. The Colonel was healthy, so there was no need for his body to go into bouts of tremors! Having worked with him for years she knew that he didn't even have an intolerance to some kind of food!

So there only was one explanation. Sam's eyes shot over to the tube connected to his body that still fed him the mysterious, unhealthy looking mud of a liquid. Sam estimated it was about a day since she had come to and realized they were force-fed some kind of substance she had no means of knowing what it exactly was. And, apparently, it was showing the first effects. On the Colonel.

Another grunt brought her attention back to him. He had started breathing again and only now when she saw his chest rise and fall regularly she became aware that he had held his breath during the unexpected attack, her brain providing her with the knowledge that breathing was difficult or sometimes even impossible during a seizure.

The Colonel leaned his head back and intentionally released his fingers, relaxing them one after the other. His body was still tense however and Sam saw his muscles bunch under his bulky clothes, as if his body was still wary of another seizure.

"Sir…?" she asked into the silence with a near-breathless voice.

He sighed and turned for her, and she was sincerely relieved when she saw his eyes focus on her.

"Sir, are you alright?" she wanted to know.

He flexed his fingers tentatively and stretched his body as much as he could, working out the kinks. "Fine again, Carter," he concluded then.

She exhaled relieved. "What was that?" she inquired.

He shrugged, unknowing. "Can't tell. Never experienced something like this before," he admitted. "Maybe I'm allergic to the food," he tried to joke, nodding his head towards the liquids the tubes were feeding him.

Sam couldn't help the fall of her face. She knew he had been trying to lighten the mood, but it didn't have the desired effect on her despite the small smile playing upon his lips she hadn't seen in weeks from him. She wrecked her brain. Could it be? Could he have an adverse reaction to whatever it was he was being forced to take in? Sam was no medic, but she had basic medical field training, serving as SG-1's field medic, and she was smart enough to know that it was highly probable. Even if the contents of this liquid weren't harmful for Tau'ri humans or even weren't harmful for the Colonel, it could be the specific combination that would make his body revolt against it. Or the liquid or the tube could be contaminated, having lost their sterility (if they even had one to begin with), and he was fed dirt and bacteria together with his 'meal', starting up infections within his body. Or it could be the wrong dosage, so that whatever he was receiving was normally no threat to his health, but since they were being constantly fed this stuff without any interruption, maybe his body had been pushed beyond the limit of what it could accept and was starting desperate tries to get rid of the exuberance. Or…

"Carter!" he interrupted her thoughts.

"Yes, sir?" she answered automatically and immediately tried telling herself that it didn't sound like the squeak she had perceived it as.

He frowned at her. "Stop overthinking," he ordered. "You're going in circles."

For a moment Sam was stunned how he could have known, but then again, Colonel O'Neill had always been more perceptive than most liked to believe.

"Yes, sir," she complied routinely, only for her eyes to fall upon the tube chained to the cuff around his biceps and get hypnotized by the gooey liquid disappearing beneath it drop by frustrating drop. She swallowed. He was already counter-reacting to it, which was a worrisome sign to itself, but neither of them could exactly stop him from receiving any more, and Sam knew what that meant. Already his body wasn't tolerating the liquid and merely getting more of it was only worsening the problem. It would only complicate the problems he was already experiencing. It wouldn't get better, no. He was only in for more difficulties and pain.

"Carter!" he sighed again. "I'm fine. Let it go already."

This time Sam clearly noticed that he was lying to her. He hadn't done it to her ever before, so she realized right away. He might have swindled to her, knowing that she would see through it nevertheless, but he'd never been full-out lying to her. Sam struggled for breath, her mind deducing what it meant. He knew he was far from being okay. He only said it for her to stop worrying herself sick over him. And he was aware what would happen next. Maybe it wasn't even the first time he had picked up on his body's strange reactions. Maybe there had been signs before she had missed out on and it _was_ already getting worse…?

Sam swallowed reflexively, when her mouth suddenly seemed dry beyond words. Oh god, what was she supposed to do? Could she do anything, really? Her brain provided her with the answer she so didn't want to hear. She couldn't do anything for him. She was as trapped as he was and nothing short of those aliens relieving him of the tube could help him get rid of this stuff. And what was the probability they would do this, given that they had hooked him up on the stuff in the first place?

The Colonel looked over to her, his gaze steady, but his jaw locked grimly. Suddenly, his eyes turned inquisitive and she saw him roam her face in a familiar way.

"You okay?" he asked uncertain.

"Yes, sir," she answered, feeling as if this were the only words she said to him nowadays. "Why do you ask?"

"You're sweating," he commented humbly.

She was? In an automatic reaction Sam tried to reach up and run her fingers over her temples, where his gaze had locked, but, of course, her restraints wouldn't allow her. So she couldn't check, but she trusted his eyes enough to believe it nonetheless.

"Didn't know I was," she whispered, feeling a queasy uneasiness taking hold of her gut. She chanced a quick glance to the sickeningly pink fluid flowing into her arm. Were those the first signs? Was she contradicting the stuff as well? Maybe it really was incompatible with them…

Now, with her eyes almost chained to the tube, Sam absurdly felt the passing time. She felt every second in which another drop of the liquid trickled into her body, as well as his. She felt every passing minute, in which they were still receiving the alien concoction, helpless in any way to refuse it. She felt every passing minute during which she was sure their bodies had to fight off the unfamiliar substance.

"Carter. Look at me," he commanded her softly.

She ripped her eyes from the tube and turned them back on him. His gaze was stormy and his facial expressions exuded anger, but she couldn't tell, why or who it was directed against.

"We're gonna be fine!" he intoned strongly.

"Sir…!" she began.

"Ack!" he interrupted immediately. "No, Carter! _We're gonna be fine_. D'you hear me?"

She nodded, unable to contradict him, when he sounded so sure and confident about something.

He sighed and closed his eyes for a second, before continuing: "It's your time to sleep."

Sam scrunched up her nose. She really wasn't sure, if she could fall asleep _now_ of all times.

As if he expected her to argue, he looked at her with an intensity that, for the first time, made her realize how close they actually were. The space between their stretchers was just wide enough for another human to squeeze through – and not a human with the format of the Colonel. More of a human the size of a certain CMO they were both very familiar with. Actually, if neither of them had been bound that tightly, they could have reached over to the other without any difficulties. They wouldn't even have to stretch for it.

"Carter, we don't know what'll happen," he explained into her musings. "You'll need your strength. So sleep."

She was losing – and not at all because he could always make it an order. She was deprived enough of his attention that she was willing to go along with almost anything he asked of her as long as it ensured he would keep his attention focused to her.

"Yes, sir," she said dutifully, closing her eyes. She tried her best to sniff the picture of a ticking clock that was bouncing back and forth in her head, but it was surprisingly persistent. She just couldn't rid herself of feeling the pressure of the passing time that was hounding her like an ominous cloud over her head.

"Breathe, Sam," she heard his voice cut into her circling thoughts.

She exhaled intentionally and then consciously set a slow, deep rhythm that she knew would get her drowsy soon. In the total silence of the room she could hear his breaths and before she finally slipped into oblivion, she registered somewhere in the back of her befuddled mind, that she had adjusted to his rhythm and had come to breathe in synchrony with him.

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"Daniel! Teal'c! What are you guys doing here!?" a non-too-pleased voice asked strained.

Daniel looked at the other man, glad that they had _finally_ found him! It really was hard locating people when all you knew about their current address was _the planet_ …!

"Thank god!" Daniel breathed out, while running a hand over his face, unknowingly smearing dirt all over his forehead. "We've been searching for you!"

"Yeah, and you found me," the voice grumbled gruffly. "Nearly blew my cover! So what's so damn important?"

Daniel inhaled, before continuing: "Jack and Sam have problems and we need your help!"

Major General Jacob Carter, retired, looked at them sharply, before nodding harshly. "Tell me, what you need."


	7. Triggering

_As usual, thanks to all who read, follow and, especially, review my story! I'll have to say it: it's just so interesting to see what you think of the story so far!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Seven – Triggering_

Jack jolted awake, when another seizure took hold of his body. Oh, for cryin' out loud!

He clenched his teeth together, biting down hard on them, and pressed his chin against his chest to keep his head stable, while his body trembled and twitched wildly. Trying to distract himself, he counted the passing seconds in his head and cursed silently, when he realized the attacks were getting longer.

Jack could feel his body strain against the restraints and the unfamiliar material bite into his body with more and more force. By now he assumed he had some very interesting shaped bruises all over his body and was seriously amazed that his P90 hadn't even protested to the forces it was encompassed between.

Finally, after what seemed to be hours but were probably only minutes, Jack felt the seizure give, his body relaxing bit by bit. Greedily, he sucked in air, filling his lungs with the much needed oxygen. When he was sure that he was through the attack, he rested his head back against the stretcher beneath him and took a second to consciously calm himself down. He knew the seizures weren't a good sign. He only knew for his body to react in this way, when he'd been confronted with too much or too high charged electricity, but even then it usually were only quick twitches and it was mostly confined to a specific body part. For example once his hand had been suffering painful trembles when the SGC's main computer had erupted into shiny sparks beneath his fingers…

But yeah, the electric _treatments_ here had stopped. For now. The moment they had hooked them up to those drugs. Given, Jack couldn't really be sure that they actually were drugs, but he assumed as much. Because what else would they be given, seeing that they were prisoners/lab-rats. Certainly not additional nutrition or some good ol' vitamins…

Exhaling, the Colonel opened his eyes once more and tried to estimate how much time had passed by the amount of soreness still lingering in his body. When the first seizures had hit, he had been exhausted then and had dozed off often enough, even had fallen asleep when the harder ones began to settle in. When he had woken up afterwards, he had been almost back to normal, but now that the attacks grew longer and harder every time, he was feeling the aftereffects more and more each time. His body was sore, tired and his muscles ached. It felt like the muscle ache he had had within the first weeks of going through field training for the Air Force Academy. Every limb ached even when he stayed still and he felt reluctant to move from all the pain. At first Jack had been able to guess the passed time by the amount of pain he was still in. The more time had passed, the more he had been able to recover and was subsequently feeling better. But now the seizures came more and more frequently, ripping him of the time he needed to recover completely. He was left in a state of never-dulling pain and could only differentiate by how bad it felt.

Jack slowly turned his head. It was about the only movement he still allowed himself and only because he needed to check on Carter. Whatever those drugs were they were being force-fed, she was suffering from them, too.

"Carter?" he asked, but didn't receive an answer. Which wasn't too uncommon anymore. Still, he cursed under his breath.

Shortly after his seizures had started, she had begun reacting to the drugs with bouts of fever. At the beginning, she had managed to recuperate, fighting back her body's reactions, but just like him, the effects on her had started to worsen. Her fever would stay longer, would go higher. Sometimes, she would come out of it and was coherent, talking with him, but those periods of times became shorter and shorter. Now she was unconscious most of the time, her face ghostly white with an unhealthy red blush spreading over her cheeks and her forehead, while her body hung limp in her restraints. Jack could hear her breath rattling in her chest, whenever he wasn't distracted by a seizure. He would still call out to her from time to time, trying to coax a reaction out of her, but most of the time she didn't even give any indication that she realized he was talking to her. Damn it all!

Jack knew that those were bad signs. If this was continuing, neither of them would be able to hold on any longer. Jack barely managed to stay conscious through his seizures and wasn't sure, how much longer he could. But he was pretty sure that the moment he would fall unconscious chances were high that he would suffocate during one of the seizures or hurt something important his body wouldn't be able to heal in time with the added strain. All in all, chances were good he didn't have much time anymore. And Sam wasn't faring any better. From the unhealthy look on her face and the sweat dripping from her nose and running down her temples, he could tell that the fever was bordering on a temperature that would cause lethal damage in her body. Neither of them had enough strength left to adequately fight their illnesses, they were barely hanging on. The strain of the imprisonment and the experiments they had had to go through had left their power resources drained.

And there was still no sign of any S&R team coming for them. Jack was unsure how much time had actually passed while they'd been here, but he guessed they had crossed the standard times for S&R missions already. Oh, the SGC would still be on the lookout for them, but they would have stopped actively searching, following SOP. So nobody would come for them.

Jack hated the thought with all the strength he still had left, but he saw no way out anymore. Neither he nor Sam were in any condition to free themselves and reinforcements were unlikely to come. And their circumstances were getting worse with every passing second. So by now, Jack really wasn't sure anymore, if they would get out of this here. Maybe this was finally the point where their good luck had abandoned them. Maybe they had finally run out of the luck SG-1 was known for and were paying the price. Maybe they would lastly die, here.

Jack looked over to Sam, roaming his eyes over her face. Again, he became aware how much he had denied himself to look at her in the last time. He had put so much distance between them that it was bordering on avoidance. And, honestly? If he'd known, it was to end here, he wouldn't have struggled so much. Hell, he would've screwed the regs and not only metaphorically!

Now, and only now, Jack felt how much he had really missed her. They had seen each other daily at work, much like before, and yet it had been so different. It just hadn't been the same without their usual interaction. It wasn't enough for him to just stand next to her, he wanted to stand _this_ tiny bit closer to her that no one else did. It wasn't just enough for him to let his eyes graze over her face, he wanted to look gazes with her and see that sudden mischievous spark that would glitter in her eyes, when he prompted her. It wasn't just enough for him to laugh alongside her at some antics Daniel had shown, he wanted to get her to show that megawatt smile she reserved for him.

All in all, he just wanted Carter back. But yeah, guess like always in his life, he had just missed the chance. He had let himself get held back by outer circumstances and had missed his chance with her. And now, he probably wouldn't even get to apologize to her, let alone say goodbye…

Another seizure took hold of his body and he felt nearly crushed by the immense pain. Before Jack could react properly, his head snapped back and banged painfully against the metal stretcher. He could feel his muscles strain in a desperate attempt to accommodate to the exceptional circumstances and his blood pounded in his ears, rushing through his body way too fast. He could actually _feel_ something rip within his body and the pain that erupted pressed all air from his lungs, leaving him gasping for breath. Black dots began to swim in his vision and despite his best efforts, Jack could feel himself lose ground. He was fast sucked into unconsciousness, not able to get the control back over his body or his senses.

With his last strength he turned his aching head towards Carter and tried to burn her features into his memory. If this was the last time he got to see her, then he wanted to remember her for eternity.

"Sam…!" he croaked, before he finally couldn't take it anymore and fell unconscious.

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When the wormhole behind them disengaged, Daniel was left with the familiar feeling of silence he affiliated P3T-643 with. Immediately, Teal'c started checking out the perimeters, but Daniel thought the planet to be as deserted as all the other days and weeks they had spent here.

" _So this is it_ ," Jacob said and Daniel was surprised when he was obviously confronted with Selmak.

"Yes," the archaeologist nodded. "We lost contact here with Jack and Sam on our initial mission."

" _How long ago?_ " Selmak inquired toneless and Daniel seriously had to think about it.

"Um… we only were here for some hours. When we reported back, the SGC sent the obligatory UAV and then the S&R teams… We've got permission for an extended search from the Joint Chiefs of Staff, because of Jack's and Sam's sensible knowledge. And then the time in which we tried to convince them to not abandon the search…" Daniel trailed off, trying to do the math.

"I believe it to be three weeks and four days, Jacob Carter," Teal'c informed them from where he examined a rock formation.

"Almost four weeks?!" Jacob suddenly exploded, making Daniel next to him wince. "And you only thought of telling me now?!"

Daniel tried his best to look apologetic, but honestly? The archaeologist felt they had had more pressing problems during that time than thinking of bringing the Tok'ra on board, even if Jacob was Sam's dad.

" _We understand_ ," Selmak suddenly cut in, but by the conflicted look on his face, Daniel was pretty sure that Jacob did not and thus the Tok'ra had decided to take over, so they were actually getting things done.

" _What happened?_ " Selmak inquired.

"Um… we don't know," Daniel admitted. "Sam and Jack were doing a perimeter scout, but they never came back. And when we couldn't reach them via radio, we went back to get the cavalry."

" _I see,_ " Selmak concluded. " _And during your searches, did you find–?_ "

"Nothing!" Daniel and Teal'c exclaimed simultaneously.

The Tok'ra raised an eyebrow questioningly, prompting Daniel to explain: "We searched everywhere we could reach in the week we spent here, but as far as we have come, there is nothing here on this planet. We didn't even stumble upon a bird or a mouse!"

" _No possibly hostile civilization?_ "

"No civilization whatsoever," Daniel corrected.

The Tok'ra seemed to think for a moment and then moved to pull a small, rectangular tool from his earthy-brown jacket. Curiously, Daniel looked over.

" _It's a close-range scanner_ ," the Tok'ra explained. " _It will under no circumstances be able to cover the whole planet, but if there's anything in the near vicinity, then we'll know._ "

Teal'c stepped up to them, looking over Daniel's shoulder. "What are you thinking of, Selmak of the Tok'ra?" he asked.

The Tok'ra grinned. " _Well, just because you didn't find anything doesn't mean there's nothing there._ "

"Oh!" Daniel exclaimed surprised. "You think they have somehow managed to hide their presence from us?"

" _Maybe,_ " Selmak concluded. " _Soon, we'll know for sure_."

The Tok'ra activated the device and rapid, humble beeping indicated it began working instantaneously. Daniel actually held his breath, hoping that the Tok'ra's advanced technology would get them farther than the SGC's scans had, until the small device finished with a final _bleep_.

"So?" Daniel urged impatiently.

Selmak frowned with a complicated expression on his face that made it hard for Daniel to read him. The archaeologist had to actively refrain from bouncing on his heels with nervousness. Then, suddenly, Daniel was presented with Jacob, when the older man clapped him on the back. "Good work in getting us," he praised.

"Why?" Daniel asked back confused.

Jacob turned to the two SG-1 men, showing them the scanner's display, but all Daniel could make out were lines going all over the small monitor.

"The scanner's showing underground facilities," Jacob explained.

"Oh," Daniel answered, squinting his eyes to decipher the picture the device showed them. But slowly the picture he was presented with began to make sense. From what the linguist could make out, the whole ground was undermined with structures indicating houses or halls. From where they stood at the Stargate to as far as the scanner could pick up. These weren't just underground facilities, this was an underground civilization! And all the time, they had practically been hopping over their roofs! Daniel paled upon thinking that. God, all the time while they had been searching unsuccessfully, they must have been aware of their presence! It was a miracle they hadn't even taken more of their men! Wait, why didn't they? Daniel was about to give himself a headache by worrying over this fact, when Jacob suddenly strode towards the DHD, punching in an unfamiliar address. Teal'c pulled the linguist aside, when the wormhole engaged.

"Um… Jacob?" Daniel asked worried.

But it was Selmak, who answered: " _We must leave immediately. We have no means of knowing what this unknown civilization is capable of and I would rather not stay and wait, until we find out, if they have noticed my scanning._ "

Daniel understood that. Totally did. But still. "What about Jack and Sam?"

" _We have to come for them another time. The three of us will not be sufficient to start a rescue mission_ ," Selmak elaborated.

"Selmak is right," Teal'c agreed.

Daniel sighed defeated. He just hoped Jack and Sam were hanging in there. "So where we're going?"

Selmak stepped up to him. " _To the current Tok'ra base_."

Now the archaeologist almost choked. "To mount a rescue mission!?"

Selmak looked at him as if the reason had to be obvious. " _Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter are in possession of sensitive information regarding the Tok'ra. It would not be in our best interests to leave them to an unknown enemy. So, now that the Tau'ri seem to have ceased all rescue measures, the Tok'ra will make sure that neither officer will be able to spill any information._ "

Daniel clearly heard the double meaning and tried not to bristle at that.

Then, Jacob took over once more, smiling reassuringly at Daniel. "Don't worry, Daniel," he said. "We'll get them out."

Daniel nodded back gratefully, thinking that this was probably the best he could hope for in this situation.

"It will take some time, because most of the Tok'ra are on missions, of course, but we'll use the time to send a ship with long-range scanners and get an overall vision of the underground structures on this planet," Jacob explained, obviously treading ideas with Selmak in his head.

Daniel sighed relieved, while walking towards the waiting event horizon with Jacob and Selmak.

"Oh, and Daniel?" Jacob asked sweetly.

"Yeah?" the archaeologist answered warily.

"Next time, come directly for my help!" the ex-General ordered.

Daniel looked confused. "You expect there to be a next time?"

The General's head snapped around. "There better be not!" he scowled.

Daniel raised his hands in a calming gesture. "Hey, I'm not the one, who went MIA. I'll leave that to the military part of our team!" he defended himself.

"Indeed," Teal'c nodded. "Daniel Jackson is more known for his presumed deaths."

"Hey!" the archaeologist shouted indignantly. "That was one time!"

Teal'c smiled knowingly at him and together all three men stepped through the event horizon, heading for the recent Tok'ra home world.

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General Hammond had just been on his way back to his office after the debriefing with SG-18, when the alarms blared out. Sighing, the General turned back for the stairs, before Sergeant Harriman could even announce: " _Unscheduled off-world activation!_ " over the PA system. The General had walked up to the Chief Master Sergeant, before he had ended his sentence and together they waited for any identification signal to arrive.

"From which planet are we being dialed up?" the General asked, his eyes smack on the screens in front of them.

Harriman checked something, before shaking his head. "Unknown, sir."

"So this planet's not in the Abydos' cartouche?" General Hammond concluded.

"No, sir," Harriman agreed.

"Then check the addresses we got from Colonel O'Neill," the General ordered, but before Sergeant Harriman could follow through with the command a familiar signal blinked up on the computer's monitors, making both men hold in.

"Um… receiving IDC, sir," Harriman reported. "It's… Doctor Jackson's code!"

General Hammond almost sighed with relief. Given, he was still furious with the archaeologist for his reckless, rash behavior, but he trusted the man enough so that he hadn't immediately alerted the President and the Joint Chiefs of Staff for this evident breach of security. Instead, he had decided to give him and Teal'c a day, before he would get Kinsey on the plan to get them locked out of the system, too. Okay, so two days had passed already, but commanding Cheyenne Mountain was a demanding job, so it could happen that such things were going under, couldn't it…?

General Hammond reached out for the intercom and ordered the security team on stand-by in the 'Gate room to be on the watch, observing them raise their personal defense weapons, safeties switched off in the split of a second in response to his order. The General wanted to just command the Chief Master Sergeant waiting next to him for his orders to open the iris, but the SOPs prevented that. Doctor Jackson and Teal'c had practically fled from the base, abandoned their posts and gone off-world without informing him of their goal and their intentions. General Hammond had no means of knowing where they had gone, what they had done or who they had stumbled upon. By all means, they could have gotten compromised or influenced by some foe and the General couldn't say if it was still safe to let them return to Cheyenne Mountain. But apparently, the archaeologist had borne in mind how their standard operation procedures worked, the General figured, when Sergeant Harriman announced: "We're receiving visual data."

"On the screen!" the General ordered immediately.

And with a click on the keyboard Daniel Jackson's head appeared on the monitors in the control room.

" _General Hammond!_ " he greeted with the usual static that came from the transmission through the wormhole.

"Doctor Jackson?" General Hammond greeted back with all the irritation he felt present in his voice.

To his credit, the archaeologist winced visibly. " _Ah, I can explain everything!_ " he promised instantly. " _But right now we have more important problems! Teal'c and I are currently with the Tok'ra and we have located Sam and Jack! The Tok'ra are starting a rescue mission, but they need more manpower, so is there any chance we could get some SG teams for…_ "

This time, General Hammond really reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose. Talk about great timing! While the General was glad beyond words that the Tok'ra had managed to locate his 2IC and their best astrophysicist, he had just been ordered to cease all rescue measures for the two officers gone MIA. Actually, General Hammond hadn't been willing to take the defeat with Kinsey and had tried pleading their cases once more, only for it to end in a base-wide order to abandon all means of help for these two officers. So he couldn't comply with Daniel Jackson's wishes without going against direct orders.

Harriman looked back at him, clearly aware of the dead end the General had maneuvered himself into. Still, General Hammond hadn't made it to a two-star with sucking up and complying to shit. Just like a certain Colonel he could really use back at his base, he had strayed from direct orders with creative ways when he felt he knew better than those higher-ups who weren't directly involved anyways. He had always ensured, however, that the results far outweighed his insubordination, so nobody had complained yet and he had made his way through the ranks steadily.

Turning back to the anxiously awaiting archaeologist, the General said: "Doctor Jackson, you know as well as we do that all search and rescue measures for Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter have been ceased!"

The linguist opened his mouth immediately, undoubtedly to plead his case, but General Hammond was faster. "But if I understand you correctly, you're requesting backup for a Tok'ra undercover mission?"

Daniel's mouth snapped shut with a clap that the General imagined he could hear over the transmission covering millions of light years. Then the linguist began nodding furiously, having caught on to the General's implied meaning.

"Alright," General Hammond smiled. "Of course we'll support our longest allies. How many teams do you need?"

Daniel beamed, practically lighting up like a christmas tree. " _Thank you!_ " he said sincerely. " _I think four or five teams would be sufficient._ "

The General inclined his head. "We'll see what we can manage. I'll have them geared up in two hours and send them through to you."

" _Thank you,_ " Daniel repeated earnestly. " _I'll send our coordinates and the planet's address_."

Almost immediately, Harriman confirmed: "Data received."

General Hammond nodded in the same moment the wormhole disengaged and the transmission ended abruptly.

"Alright Sergeant, page SG's 8, 15 and 21. Briefing in half an hour," the General ordered.

"Yes, sir. Um… sir?"

General Hammond nodded for the Chief Master Sergeant to continue.

"Not to sound presumptuous, sir, but I really think Colonel Reynolds would want to be present for this mission…" the Sergeant trailed off, unsure if he had overstepped his boundaries.

"Probably," the General agreed, knowing as well as the faithful Sergeant how very much personal the Colonel had taken it that his S&R mission to find Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter had been rudely interrupted, before he could bring his friends back.

The General thought for a moment. "SG-3's on P8S-76L, right?"

"Yes, sir," Harriman confirmed innocently. "Doctor Balinsky is studying the ruins Doctor Holland from SG-20 was pestering you about…"

The General remembered the lively outburst the temperamental woman on SG-20 had had in the middle of the control room, when he had given the mission to SG-3.

"Alright Sergeant, get SG-3 back here and SG-20 geared up. They're taking over on P8S-76L."

"On it, sir," the Sergeant nodded, while dialing up the aforementioned planet.

As soon as the wormhole had engaged, the Sergeant was broadcasting. "SG-3-niner, this is Stargate Command. Can you hear me?"

It took only a moment for Reynolds to answer and Harriman almost chuckled at the relaxed voice the Colonel used. He hadn't been there himself, but from what he'd heard about the planet it had to be a tropical paradise.

"SG-3, you are to return to the base, as soon as SG-20 has taken over your job," Harriman reported and upon Reynolds' grumbling, added: "You're in for a mission you surely don't want to miss!"

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Jack came to, when the strangest noises reached him. For a moment, he was unsure, if he'd dreamed it up, because his head was coming up with the weirdest things nowadays. Sluggishly, he tried to lift his head, tried to look around, but his body failed him. He felt weak, as if his whole strength had left him. At the same time, he could feel that his body was tense, strained beyond his limits so that it wasn't merely uncomfortable, but painful. His muscles still twitched, although he didn't have a seizure and from the way he wasn't getting air into his lungs he knew that his body revolted against his restraints.

Jack pried his eyes open with an effort that was just unfair. The picture he was presented with swam and swayed and he could only make out colorful dots. Wait a minute? Colorful? Hadn't his cell been dark the last time he'd checked?

Jack squinted his eyes, trying to get a clear vision. Okay, the dark green and brown he could explain. That were his camouflage BDUs he was staring at. But the rest? Jack blinked rapidly, until the picture finally cleared in front of his eyes. He saw the green alien working with another light green one on the computers and the red one standing behind them, seemingly barking out orders. Yellow and light gray aliens were running back and forth. Jack stared at them amused. He'd never seen these aliens so… uncomposed. Was that actually a word? But yeah, it fitted. He had never seen them so… hectic and chaotic, so… _reacting_.

For a second Jack only watched. Whatever had happened must have gotten them into a tight spot. They were desperate, Jack could see it. Amazing that they still managed to not make any sound. Jack frowned. Was that even true? They had to make sound, hadn't they? The red one appeared to be screaming…

Jack shook his head back and forth, as if trying to get water out of his ears. Slowly, the sounds came back. He could hear the screaming and it sounded even quite agitated. There was the stomping of light feet hurrying back and forth and the sound of _clicks_ , when one of the green ones hit their computer's display too hard. And there was a rapid, frantic beeping overall that just wouldn't shut the hell up!

Jack looked around, trying to find out where the unfamiliar noise was coming from. And then his eyes fell upon her. _Carter!_

It wasn't a pretty sight, not at all. Her body was hanging sideways into the restraints, lifeless aside from the wriggling that overcame her much like his seizures. Her face was deathly pale with almost dark red patches on her cheeks and forehead that indicated that her fever had risen even more. Sweat was dropping from her nose and her chin, and her hair was slicked to her face, dark from the perspiration. Her clothes were glued to her body, drenched in sweat. Her mouth was opened, but try as he might, Jack couldn't see her breathe. She was dead to the world and whenever a series of twitches hit her body, she didn't react in any way.

Jack paled and suddenly was wide awake. His body still felt detached and heavy, but his mind was focused. On her and the rapid beeping that he assumed was an alarm. An alarm that probably told the aliens that her state had deteriorated enough to be worried. No, from the anxiety he witnessed, it was more than that. They were working too frantic, as if they were trying to rescue her, not trying to diminish her fever.

And suddenly, Jack knew _exactly_ , what the rapid beeping in the background reminded him of. It was eerily similar to the Napoleonic power monger's EKG flat-lining…

Oh, no! No, no, no, _no_! She couldn't! He wouldn't allow her!

"Sam!" he called out, over the chaos exploding in their cell. "SAM!"

No response. No reaction. No whatsoever. For cryin' out loud!

"SAM!"

Nothing.

"Don't you _dare_ give up on me now, Major! That's an order!"

He wasn't surprised however, when that got him just as much reaction as he'd received before: none.

God, he couldn't! He couldn't lose her! Not now. Not _ever_.

Jack had known that it was a possibility, had known that they were heading this way given their situation if nothing happened. He hadn't been prepared, though. Having to witness her dying was the worst torture he had been exposed to in his whole life. He had had to go through it before, had seen her flat-lining when Jolinar had died inside her and the entity had overtaken her, and it had been enough. He couldn't take any more. Sam wasn't supposed to die, she was supposed to live! She was young, she was beautiful, she was _needed_. So why her? Why couldn't it have been him instead? He would have taken her place in an instant!

One of the gray clad aliens stepped up to her, obscuring Jack's view on her. It began doing something, but Jack couldn't see what. Anger welled up in the Colonel upon seeing the alien touch her. They had no right to touch her. They had had no right to experiment on her. They were responsible for her state now!

Jack growled heatedly, a sound even he had never heard himself usher before. Anger raced through his body, burning hot and scorching everything that came into its way. They had hurt her. They had made her suffer. They had essentially _killed_ her!

Suddenly, something inside Jack seemed to _burst_. The anger took over, turning into full-blown rage that consumed his whole body and strengthened it, making an unusual powerful feeling rush through him. Jack's whole senses centered on the sight of Sam, his complete attention glued to her.

Without him noticing, Jack's body leaned forwards, straining against his restraints. His muscles bulged, counteracting the restraints, fighting against them. Jack grunted from the effort, but he was barely aware. Another alarm began to rise and he felt his restraints dig harder into his body, working to pull him back. Jack almost felt himself explode at the realization. They would _not_ hinder him from reaching her! He pushed harder, feeling the restraints bite into his body. His weapons and his clothes creaked and tore under the combined pressure, and here and there, the heavy bands nicked his skin, breaking through the surface and cut into his flesh, drawing blood, but Jack couldn't care less. Nothing mattered but _her_! He just had to reach her, had to see for himself how she was doing!

Jack groaned from the pain his abused, tense body was enduring, but he didn't let up. His muscles worked relentlessly, battling his restraints with as much strength and effort as he could muster. He was determined. With a firm goal set in mind, Jack _worked_ ; worked towards his goal, simply _refusing_ to give up.

Then, suddenly, Jack felt his constraints give. With a ripping sound the bands across his chest and arms tore. Jack inhaled deeply now that he was finally able to, reveling in the oxygen that finally flowed back into his lungs. Immediately, he sat up, one of his hands instantly reaching for the combat knife attached to the belt at his hip. Within seconds he was completely free, his restraints hanging in limp, torn pieces. Jack slid from the metal stretcher, testing cautiously if his legs would hold him. Astonishingly, they did, even though all he'd done for weeks had been lying down.

New alarms joined the still ringing ones, but Jack only concentrated on the alarm he knew was connected to Sam. Still going. Shit.

Stashing the knife back, Jack reached up for the cuffs around his arms. Without a care for the damage he could do to himself, he ripped all tubes and cables from them. Immediately blood began to trickle down his arms when a few of the connecting needles were torn out by him, but the only thing Jack focused on was the brownish mud now spilling onto the cell's ground. Good, that was where it belonged.

Jack tried his cuffs, but couldn't get them loose. But he managed to force them down his arms, producing holes and tears in his flesh when the remaining needles within the cuffs ripped through his skin in the process. Jack grunted from the pain, but didn't pay it much attention. He just wanted to get rid of them, get finally freed! With a satisfying _clank_ the cuffs fell to the ground. Jack didn't even wait to hear it, the moment he was unbound from all restrictions he bee-lined for Sam.

Jack had grabbed his knife and cut her free in one smooth movement, before he began ripping the tubes and cables from her. He managed to untangle her, but couldn't get the cuffs off of her. He tried to be gentle but seriously lacked the time and since she had smaller upper arms than he had, he couldn't get the cuffs loose enough to relieve her of them. Alright, then this would have to wait, he decided.

Then, almost dreadful, Jack reached up and searched for her pulse. He pressed his fingers into her throat, but couldn't find anything. Cursing, he tried to stay calm and form a plan what he could do. CPR wouldn't do in their situation. It would only allow their captors enough time to get him back under their control and then she would have no chance anymore. His best option was to get her to a doctor, as fast as possible. Maybe it wasn't too late. But that meant getting her back to the SGC, or at the very least out of this lab.

Jack knew that given their situation this was next to impossible, but nevertheless he straightened with resolve. She would have no other option, so he would do whatever he could. Either he would get her out of here, or he would die alongside her, trying.

His jaw set with determination. Reaching forwards, Jack unclipped Sam's P90 and let the gun fall to the ground, but didn't touch her other weapons. He might still need them. Then he hoisted her up, throwing her over his shoulders in a fireman's carry. He was astonished how light she was. Considering her whole equipment, she should weigh more…

Grimly he realized that this was probably not a good sign.

Not giving himself the time to think, Jack turned, heading automatically for the direction he knew the doors were. He had barely made a few steps, when the red alien rushed into his way, barking something he couldn't understand anyways in a commanding voice. Jack shifted his grip, holding onto Sam with his left arm, while the right one went for his Berretta strapped to his thigh. He raised the weapon with used movements, but obviously the alien had no idea, what it was for, because it just kept on shouting, _demanding_.

"Out of my way!" Jack snarled, the rage still evident in his voice.

The alien didn't move. So Jack felled it. A single, accurate shot, striking the alien between its eyes. The alien fell, hitting the ground the moment Jack strode past.

Immediately, all alarms went still, before a new, almost deafening one blared up. Jack short-circuited the door's electronics with another well-placed shot, which thankfully made the door open up, and hurried through. He had been military long enough to know what this kind of alarm meant, even if he was on another, alien planet. It was a base-wide alarm, indicating that the prisoners had escaped. So now, wherever he was, all aliens present would be on their tails, trying to recapture them.

Jack began to hurry down hallways at a random. He had no idea, where he had to go. Everything was unfamiliar.

Almost instantly, he could feel his own exhaustion creep back into his limbs, while he staggered down unknown corridors, but pushed it back stubbornly. This was their only chance. On his shoulders he could feel the high body heat and the sweat coming from Sam soak into his BDUs and the hand that held her wrist to keep her stable while he sprinted down dark corridors with her told him clearly that she still had no pulse.

God, it would be a miracle, if he got them out of this! And even then, he knew, it wouldn't guarantee that it had still been in time for her…


	8. Infiltrating

_And again, thank you all for reading and following the story, and, of course, reviewing it!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Eight – Infiltrating_

"Thanks," Daniel said, while taking a combat helmet from Colonel Reynolds and strapping it to his head. He and Teal'c hadn't returned to Earth, so the SG teams from the SGC had brought what they deemed necessary, including combat equipment for the two remaining members of SG-1. The moment the helmet was secured around the earpiece that would allow him to communicate with his team mates, Daniel reached over to take the P90 the Colonel was holding out to him and clipped it to his protection vest.

When the archaeologist was done, he let his eyes travel over the small assembly in front of the Stargate. Next to him stood Teal'c, Colonel Reynolds and the SG team leaders with their teams trailing further in the back, and over by the DHD stood Jacob and a few Tok'ra. Behind Colonel Reynolds, who had command of the mission, waited SG-3, not so silently. Major Warren and the Lieutenants Johnson and Judson were lively discussing their oncoming mission, speculating what could have happened to Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter that they had been unable to free themselves. After all, SG-1 was known for getting out of the tightest spots. Next to Colonel Reynolds stood Major Doctor Fraiser, all geared up with her team, SG-8 right behind her. Captain Strong, Lieutenant Palmer and the medical specialist Donovan quietly but routinely checked their equipment, preparing for every case they could think of. Unsurprisingly, the medically trained officers of SG-8 were by far the ones heaviest laden with luggage. Since Doctor Fraiser had no means of knowing what had happened to Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, she had packed everything she thought might be necessary. Next to Teal'c paced Major Graham, CO of SG-21, his 2IC, Captain Wesson, rolling his eyes at the impatient antics of his team leader. The rest of the team, the Lieutenants Green and Jones, kept an interested eye on the Tok'ra. And lastly, next to Colonel Reynolds, stood Major Pierce of SG-15. His team, consisting of Lieutenant Aston, Airman Dwight and Doctor Kemp, waited further back for instructions. Daniel wasn't sure, why Doctor Kemp was here, because as far as he knew, the Doctor's specialty was 'everything technical' as Siler had once put it so fittingly, but then again, he was also here, wasn't he? Neither of them were military, but this didn't mean they couldn't contribute to the rescue mission.

Daniel's eyes wandered over to the DHD, where Jacob stood. Around him, in a circle, waited a few Tok'ra: a dark-skinned man going by the name of Marnon as far as Daniel had understood, a female Tok'ra called Sina that had come to the SGC a few times already and – much to Jack's pleasure undoubtedly – Anise. Just like the SG teams, they were waiting for the final Tok'ra to join their assembly. From what Daniel had caught from conversations with Jacob and Selmak, the man named Malek had been closest to the planet Jack and Sam had gone MIA on and had flown over with one of their ships to do the long-range scans. He was to hide the ship on the planet and use the Stargate to come back and join the rescue mission. It would be faster and it would leave them with a ship in case they couldn't hold the Stargate, so neither Daniel nor Colonel Reynolds had any problem with the plan the Tok'ra had launched without so much as asking them first. But while it would normally create some dissonance with the SG teams whenever the Tok'ra just did their thing, they were all good friends enough with Jack and Sam to tolerate it for once.

Finally, the Stargate on the Tok'ra's home planet was lighting up and as soon as the event horizon had built, a tall, blond man stepped out of the wormhole. Immediately the Tok'ra's heads snapped around and Daniel heard Selmak's voice ask: " _Did you get the plans?_ "

The man, apparently Malek, nodded. " _The scans should be helpful._ "

Instantly, all team leaders and the Tok'ra piled around a small tool Malek was wearing clipped to his wrist that made a 3-D-plan of a very complex housing structure appear in the air between them. Slowly the picture rotated and Daniel tried to burn it into his mind. Reynolds and Pierce whistled impressed.

"Huge," Pierce commented.

"Indeed," Teal'c agreed.

Jacob studied the slowly rotating picture carefully, before Selmak's voice asked slightly miffed: " _Is that all?_ "

Malek inclined his head in understanding sympathy. " _Unfortunately,_ " he admitted. " _I cannot exactly say why, but our scanners were unable to penetrate the outer walls of the underground structure. I cannot specify how many individuals live down there or where we should begin the search for the missing officers._ "

Daniel gnawed on his lower lip in frustration. Damn it! This wasn't much information to go on, he mused. They were essentially running head-on into the unknown. These underground structures appeared rather spacious. Who knew how many aliens lived there? The possibility that they would be sincerely outnumbered was enormous. And since they hadn't even seen one of their foes yet, nobody could know what they were dealing with. It was a high risk, Daniel knew.

" _Not much to go on…_ " Selmak murmured out loud.

Malek nodded. " _It will be a risky mission._ "

"Nobody forces you to come," Major Graham grumbled under his breath, but the Tok'ra ignored him.

Daniel said nothing to it, but inwardly he believed the Tok'ra to be right. This mission practically screamed to go wrong on so many levels. Still, these were Sam's and Jack's lives that were at the stake, so Daniel shut the hell up. He'd done everything he could to find them and when he was finally about to reach this goal, he would stop at nothing to get them out. With or without help, he didn't care.

Next to Daniel, Colonel Reynolds shifted, his hands gripping the handle of his P90 in a habitual, but relaxed motion. "SG-3 will go," he decided without looking at his men. He didn't need to, though. The grim expressions on their faces told Daniel all he needed to know.

"We don't leave our men back," Major Graham agreed.

"Colonel O'Neill would have been the first one to come for us, too," Major Pierce nodded.

Nobody of SG-8 said anything, but the determined looks Daniel was presented with made him realize that they would go wherever their team mates went. Their professions as medical experts demanded that they provided back-up in the upcoming battle no matter the odds.

" _I cannot force any of the Tok'ra present, because we usually only go on missions voluntarily, but_ I _will accompany you._ ", Selmak promised and the dead-set expression on Jacob's face clearly said that nothing on this world – or any other – would get the retired Air Force General to stay back, Tok'ra in his head or not.

" _Um… I may not be of much help, but I will travel with you and do whatever I can_.", Anise said hesitantly. For a moment, Daniel was surprised. Anise was no fighter. She was a scientist with only rare exposures to battles, and certainly not the ones where she had to stand in the first lines of offense. So whether it was the Za'tarc fiasco she still felt responsible for or the feelings she harbored for Jack that made her come along, she seemed willing to do her best to contribute to the mission and that was all Daniel cared for right now.

Nods were seen through the sparse rows of the Tok'ra then. Nobody backed out.

"I believe we have decided, then?" Teal'c inquired. Of course nobody questioned whether or not Teal'c would come along. Daniel was convinced not even 'undomesticated equines' could restrain him from coming to their friends' aid.

" _Yes,_ " Selmak agreed. " _Then all we need is a plan of action…_ "

Daniel looked over to Reynolds. As the highest ranking officer he had command of the S&R mission so whatever he decided would be done. The Colonel certainly didn't waste any time.

"I want us to split up in teams," he said, his eyes still focused on the picture of the underground structure that leisurely circled in the air. "We're not even remotely enough men to launch a full-front attack. But small teams will be able to go in undetected and search for Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter. SG-21 will stay back at the Stargate and hold it for our return. In case any team runs into unforeseen troubles, they will also act as back-up to bail them out. The other teams will go in here… here… and here," Reynolds pointed at certain spots in the picture, where the underground structure connected to the surface. They were all in close vicinity to the Stargate. "…and try to find out where they hold our friends."

Reynolds shot a quick glance at all assembled. "SG-15 will take this entry here and my team this one. Daniel and Teal'c, I want you to go in at this spot and you'll take Warren with you. And I want one officer of SG-8 on each team for medical assistance!"

No one questioned the order. Instead, SG-8's officers silently distributed, Doctor Fraiser immediately heading for Daniel and Teal'c. Major Warren from SG-3 came to stand with them, too, while Lieutenant Palmer from SG-8 stepped up to SG-3. Captain Strong went with SG-15 and Donovan decided to stay back with SG-21.

Then Malek cut in: " _I will distribute the scans I have attained to all Tok'ra. So it would be most effective, if one Tok'ra accompanied each Tau'ri team._ "

Jacob nodded and, of course, announced to go with SG-1. Sina would go with SG-3 and Marnon with SG-15. Malek was silent for a moment, thinking, but then decided to assist Jacob and SG-1.

" _Um… then I should probably stay with them,_ " Anise suggested insecure while pointing at SG-21, who would stay back at the Stargate. " _I have the least experience with battles…_ "

"Alright," Reynolds and Jacob agreed, both Tau'ri as well as Tok'ra leader satisfied with what little preparations they could do for this mission.

Malek went around, distributing the scans he'd done, while all SG teams checked their radio reception. Weapons were readied and luggage was shouldered. The leaders of the appointed groups took lead before simultaneously all heads went to the silently waiting Stargate.

"Well then let's do this," Reynolds announced. "Let's get our friends back. Daniel, dial us up!"

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The wormhole disengaged behind them quietly, unnoticed. Daniel hurried forwards, his P90 raised to eye-level, his eyes sweeping over the surroundings in front of him over his personal defense weapon. At his sides ran Teal'c and Major Warren, Malek and Janet trailed behind him and Jacob led them. Daniel distinctly heard the other teams storm off in different directions but didn't pay them any attention. His sole focus was to keep a watchful eye on their seemingly calm surroundings, while Jacob led them over to their appointed entry. Or what would soon be their entry.

When Jacob signaled them to halt, they all fell into defensive positions. Daniel looked around. There was nothing here indicating that it could have been built by anything but nature itself. Nothing that would allow them to enter the underground structures. Were they at the right place?

Daniel observed Jacob walk around carefully, staring down onto his wrist-tool with a frown on his face. Then, suddenly, the older man stopped, looking down at a simple, unspectacular boulder surrounded by a group of sturdy trees. Again the Tok'ra consulted what Daniel believed to be some scanner and then, experimentally, Jacob gave the rock a decent kick. Daniel almost winced in sympathy, imagining the pain Jacob must feel when his boot connected audibly with the boulder. But to Daniel's astonishment, the rock merely gave out a metallic sound that echoed lowly. Jacob smiled wolfishly. "Gotcha," he exclaimed grimly.

With quick movements Jacob skillfully placed a small block of C4 on what looked like an ordinary rock. Jacob set the timer and at once, they all jogged for shelter. The explosion wouldn't be big – they were going for stealth after all – but there was still the risk of flying debris injuring them and nobody wanted to be out of the mission before it had actually begun. They all took cover behind the group of trees and Jacob counted wordlessly down with his fingers. Before the explosives could detonate however, the echoes of another explosion rang out through their earpieces, followed by Reynolds' voice, stating: " _We're in._ " Simple and down to the point.

Jacob's last finger fell and immediately, Daniel heard the detonation go off. The wannabe-rock exploded into million pieces that struck out like flying needles, embedding themselves into the surrounding trees. Weapons raised, Warren, Teal'c and Malek stormed forwards to examine the situation as soon as silence had settled over the small clearing again. Daniel followed only a second later with Janet by his side. The rock wasn't anymore. In its stead were only smoldering remains of a hinge left, giving way to a well-maintained staircase. The staircase led down into the earth's underground, dimly lit by lines of artificial light next to the stairs.

Jacob's zat crackled to life and the retired General reported dryly: "We're in, too."

The Tok'ra didn't work with human technology, so they weren't wearing the earpieces, but Jacob had been an Air Force officer long enough to snatch one the moment Reynolds had handed them out.

This time Teal'c took lead, smoothly descending the stairs with Jacob and Daniel right on his heels. Janet tailed Daniel attentively and Malek and Warren followed silently, but highly alert at the back of their group.

The stairs continued down for quite some time. Daniel saw Jacob activate the scans Malek had brought back and a smaller version of the picture they had seen before their journey here appeared on the wrist-tool. Assuming that the white dot that was appearing was them, Daniel tracked their descent from the corner of his eyes. Other points moved in the picture too, each one white, and Daniel presumed those were the other teams. Every Tok'ra wore a tracking device on missions in case back-up needed to find them and now they used it to trace the other's advance on this mission.

Suddenly and simultaneously, they all stopped. A shrill sound could be heard lowly, wafting up to them from the depths. For a moment, Daniel thought it to be Major Pierce, who announced over the echoes of an off-going explosion that they had cleared their way in. But even when his earpiece fell silent again, the nerve-wrecking sound continued. Slowly, but cautiously, they continued to jog down the stairs.

"What the hell is this…?" Daniel murmured, taking great care to go unheard.

Astonishingly, it was Janet, who answered him. "An alarm," she stated in something above a whisper.

Daniel shuddered involuntarily. "Did they discover us? Or one of the other teams?" he couldn't help but ask.

"We'll soon know," Jacob concluded and in this very moment, Daniel could see the bottom of the stairs. Right. If they had been discovered already, they would run head-on into their enemies, Daniel figured. They would expect them at the stair's end and probably don't hesitate to shoot them down immediately.

The archaeologist's throat turned dry and he had to fight the constant urge to swallow uncomfortably. He knew it wouldn't help anyways. Nobody said anything anymore. A tense silence hung between them. By now they were in enemy's territory and alert was running high within the whole group.

Jacob was the first to set foot on solid ground. But instead of the enemy, they were greeted with darkness, the lights of the stairs unable to cut through the black hallway that opened up in front of them. Instantly the light from Major Warren's P90 cut through the darkness from behind them and Daniel copied his movement. The weapons' small flashlights were only a sparse illumination for the wide, but low hallway, but they would have to suffice nonetheless. They couldn't afford to use more light and get spotted.

Jacob and Teal'c began to slowly make their way down the dark corridor. Daniel followed with Janet by his side and behind him he could hear the almost soundless steps of Malek and Major Warren. Eerie silence accompanied them on their way. It made Daniel almost more nervous than the thought of encountering a possibly hostile alien race that could severely outnumber them had. Being on SG-1 for about five years, the archaeologist had somehow grown accustomed to being thrown into firefights. He should have died more times already than he had bothered to count, but SG-1's infamous luck had always ensured they got out of all the tight situations more or less unharmed. So, oddly, Daniel was more familiar with having to defend himself in battles than he was with this silent, stealthy creeping through an enemy's fort, hoping to crawl about under their noses undetected. Every second he expected something big, something fatal to happen that would expose them and end in the dreaded firefight. Not that it was only the fight Daniel was worried about. He was very aware of certain circumstances that put their enemies in an advantageous position. They had their friends as hostages and if worst came to worst, Daniel feared their rescue attempt could make the situation even more awful for Sam and Jack. What if they wouldn't be able to rescue them? What if those aliens would lose it at their attack and kill his friends?

Daniel's stomach lurched painfully. Sometimes, he hated being a genius. His ability to multitask and his intelligence always let him come up with the worst-case scenarios when he needed them the least.

Suddenly, Janet next to him reached out and laid her hand on his upper arm. Daniel didn't flinch, even though she took him by surprise. Jack had personally overseen his weapon's training and had almost drilled it into the poor archaeologist to have a firm, unwavering grip on his weapon so the Colonel wouldn't have to worry about getting shot in the back by friendly fire. Then, Daniel had been affronted. He had soon learned to trust in Jack's experience however wherever something military was concerned.

Janet quickly stroked over his BDU-clad biceps and Daniel absentmindedly noticed the tenseness of his muscles under her fingers.

"Don't worry," she whispered, before letting go of him. "Focus. Worry, when it's time."

She was right, he concluded. They had come so far and they wouldn't stop before they had achieved their initial goal.

All of a sudden, Daniel heard a zat ring out and swiveled his head to the front. Jacob stood ready to fire again and Teal'c was guarding the other man's back. Daniel's eyes jumped left and right, taking in their surroundings. His gaze fell on a slumped form on the ground. Before he knew what to make out of it though, Janet had pushed through the ranks and had stepped up to the obviously unconscious figure. Warren followed her like a shadow, keeping a watchful eye on her. Janet kneeled down and did a quick check on the limp body.

"Unconscious, but alive. And humanoid, but not human by Earth's standards," the Doctor reported curtly.

"Well, we don't have the time to study the alien," Jacob concluded the moment Daniel opened his mouth to question away.

Janet nodded swiftly and stood back up, joining their ranks once again. They continued on, now warily approaching every turn and corner the hallway took in anticipation of another alien crossing their way.

Finally, the hallway opened up to a room, where several other corridors branched off. The rectangular room wasn't overly big and had nothing but lights in it. Daniel eyed the six corridors diverging from the room and then glanced at Jacob.

"Which way?" the archaeologist asked.

Jacob frowned down at the map Malek's scans were showing him. He seemed rather at a loss. Daniel stepped up to him and looked over his shoulder, his trained eyes quickly following the ways branching out from the blinking white dot that pointed out their location. Most led to what seemed to be assemblies of middle-sized structures, which Daniel assumed to be some sort of housing buildings by the sheer number of them. Others led to other hallways, forming a wide network through the underground. So what seemed the most interesting to Daniel was a corridor that didn't lead further down, but rather to the side, apparently ending in a small number of rooms of various sizes further away from the other housing structures. Daniel had no idea, what those structures could be for, but the secluded position seemed the most logical choice, where a prison for captives could be placed.

Daniel double-checked the right path for a second and then pointed to the hallway furthest to the left. "This way!" he declared.

" _Why do you–?"_ Malek began, but Jacob interrupted him.

"It's as good a starting point as any," he decided and quickly jogged for the hallway Daniel had singled out.

The hallway was bigger than the one they had come from and by far better lit. Comparing those two corridors, Daniel suspected that this one was a hallway that was used more often than the other one. Perhaps the other one wasn't even more than an emergency exit.

It didn't take long and they met other aliens. First it were only one or two strolling down the corridor that Jacob's and Malek's zats took quick care of. But then a large patch of brightness cut into the only sparsely lit hallway and Daniel knew immediately they were reaching some sort of brightly lit room.

Jacob slowed down in the front and carefully, they all approached the light that cut through the half-darkness of the corridor like a lighthouse. Daniel glanced up to the front and noticed that a wall of glass seemed to block their way.

"Double glass doors. Pretty thick," Jacob reported back, his eyes sweeping all over the unexpected obstacle. Then he leaned forwards to peer through the glass, but shot back immediately.

"Large room with lots of technology behind all the glass," he described for those, who couldn't look. "And there're at least a dozen of those aliens in it."

"What's it?" Major Warren wanted to know. "Some kind of control room?"

Jacob shrugged. "I can't say."

For a moment, Jacob seemed to examine something and then, without looking back, he motioned with one of his hands. "Daniel, come here."

The archaeologist pushed through the rows immediately and squished in between Major Warren and the Tok'ra. "Yes?"

Jacob pointed at something. "This seems to be a control panel for the doors, if I'm right. Can you read that and get them to open?"

Daniel examined the panel with his eyes. Jacob was most likely right and the panel was operating the doors, but the language it was encoded with looked like nothing Daniel had ever seen before. Dejected he shook his head. "Not right now. I'd need some time to translate the language and I'm not sure, we have that time right now…"

" _Do we need to get in there?_ " Malek asked from behind. " _We could scout other parts of the structure first undetected?_ "

Daniel shook his head determined. "This part is secluded and isolated from the rest of the structure. It'd be the perfect place where to hold prisoners!" he insisted.

"And if this really is some sort of control room, it could come in handy to seize control of it," Jacob added.

Major Warren nodded in agreement. "We could always blow our way in," he suggested.

Cautiously, Jacob leaned forwards and prodded the thick glass with a knuckle of his finger. Then he nodded satisfied. "Good portion of C4 should do it in," he agreed.

Immediately, Major Warren handed him various blocks of the explosive via Daniel and carefully, Jacob began to attach them to the glass. Simultaneously, Major Warren contacted the other groups to warn them of what they were about to do. There was no chance in hell that they would still be undetected after they had blown these security doors off their hinges and all other groups had to prepare themselves for enemy contact after that.

"Done," Jacob reported shortly after and without anyone needing to say the words, all assembled pressed themselves to the wall, shielding their heads despite their combat helmets.

Major Warren, who had the remote controls for the C4, moved further to the front and left Daniel to stand next to Janet. The CMO turned towards the wall behind them to shield herself from the explosion that was about to go off and her head brushed Daniel's shoulder.

"3… 2… 1…" Major Warren counted down quietly, before he activated the remote detonators.

Glass shattered with audible crashes and splinters of all sizes imaginable were shot down the corridor. Daniel actually held his breath, while the cracking and crashing momentarily drowned out the alarms blaring in the background. From the corner of his eyes the linguist saw Jacob move immediately after the way was cleared, Teal'c with his staff weapon at the ready immediately behind him. Daniel grabbed his P90 and followed them. He could feel more than see that Janet ran after him, her Berretta held securely in her capable hand. Since it could get in her way if she had to work on a patient, the Doctor had forewent a P90 and settled with handguns. Malek and Major Warren were the last ones to storm through the hole where once had been a door and instantly both covered the sides.

"Don't move!" Jacob yelled sternly and since they had no means of knowing they were understood, he repeated it in Goa'uld.

Daniel cast quick glances over the scenery they were presented with. Jacob had been right with his initial assessment. The room was large and stuffed with what Daniel assumed to be rows of large computers. Monitors were built into the walls, but were lying dormant at the moment. About a dozen aliens had been in the room, now standing frozen where they had been when they had stormed the room. Daniel took a second to examine them. They were short and skinny and not at all dangerous looking. Their faces mostly looked impassive, but Daniel thought he detected hints of fear and surprise.

The aliens were staring at them and Daniel could almost hear the wheels turn in their heads, trying to comprehend what this had to mean. They didn't understand them, this much was obvious. But then one of them noticed the Berretta in Janet's hand and it began to tremble. It shouted something in a language completely foreign to Daniel, even if parts seemed familiar, and all of a sudden panic broke out. Major Warren lifted his P90 to the ceiling and fired two single shots. Instantly deathly silence reigned and all aliens stared at their weapons terrified.

"Um… could it be they have no idea what our weapons are for…?" Daniel asked surprised.

"Well, they have now," Warren said grimly.

Together, they herded the aliens to a corner and Malek, Major Warren and Teal'c guarded them. Jacob, Daniel and Janet however turned for the computers. Neither of them had any idea how to operate these things, but they tried nevertheless. They soon learned that there were no keyboards for operating them, instead they reacted to touch. Neither of them had any idea what they were telling the computers to do whenever they touched any symbol appearing on the displays, but suddenly one of the monitors in front of them lit up. Janet jumped back surprised, ripping her hands from the computer she had been working on. On the monitor appeared a picture of a smaller room with two very familiar figures strapped down within confines.

Daniel's mouth went dry, when he croaked out: "Jack! Sam!"

So they really were here, after all! Daniel's eyes roamed over the picture, willing his friends to move to see, if they were still alive. But nothing happened. Daniel had no idea, though, if that was because it was just a picture and not a film or because they couldn't anymore…

Next to Daniel, Jacob's mouth set into a grim line and suddenly, he marched over to where the aliens stood huddled together. He grabbed the next one he could reach and pulled him over to the monitor.

"Where. Are. They," he snarled dangerously, pointing at the picture of Sam and Jack.

The alien looked at him with as much display of fear as Daniel assumed they could and then answered something neither of them could understand anyways. A vein began to throb visibly at Jacob's temple and Daniel saw that the man was close to losing it.

"Where?!" the Tok'ra spat, giving the alien a good shake.

The alien finally seemed to understand and pointed at a corner of the room. Daniel immediately rushed over and inspected the corner. It didn't take him long to find another control panel.

"There's a door!" he reported.

"Good," Jacob decided. Unceremoniously, he dropped the alien with the others once more and hurried over to Daniel. This time they didn't even waste a second with the control panel.

Jacob held out his hand to Daniel. "Give me the C4. I'll blast that door open!"

Roger that, Daniel thought grimly, before handing the retired General the explosive packs. With used movements, Jacob glued them to the door and then they both hurried back for shelter. Jacob counted down and the moment he pushed the button on the remote, the door crumbled under the force of the detonation. Daniel, Jacob and Janet rushed through the smoldering remains of the door, leaving Malek, Teal'c and Major Warren to oversee the captives. A small hallway led them to another glass door. They stopped once more. But not because they couldn't go any further, but because the door was wide open. As well as the next glass door further down the hallway. Suspiciously, they all eyed the open door, but then decided to continue anyways. The hallway turned a corner and they were presented with several doors. Again, they stopped, insecure where they should go. At the end of the hallway was another wide open door and coordinating with hand signals, they decided to check this one out first.

Cautiously and with raised weapons, they stepped into the room. It wasn't overly large, but still roomy. The door's control panel had been destroyed, leisurely shooting electric sparks, and a few feet into the room laid one of the aliens clad in a red suit bleeding onto the otherwise spotless ground. Slowly, Jacob advanced forwards and prodded the alien with a foot. Lifelessly, its head lolled to the side, wide, unseeing eyes staring forwards unresponsive.

"Dead," Janet concluded.

Yep, Daniel thought, while studying the single small hole in the aliens head. Undoubtedly.

"Looks to be one of our weapons," Janet elaborated.

"Yes," Jacob agreed, walking further into the room. "Here's a P90, too…"

Daniel hurried over to where the other man stood. Indeed, there laid one of their personal defense weapons on the ground. In what seemed to be a disgusting puddle of a brown liquid, some pink substance and quite a bit of blood. Janet stepped up to them, examining the metal tables standing on either side of the large puddle. Ripped pieces of thick leather bands were hanging from the tables, some of them bearing clear cuts, some of them simply torn.

"This is where they were held," Janet deduced, while bending down and picking up something that appeared to be a cuff. Carefully, she twisted it in her hands and studied the various needles connected to it. Then, almost on a whim, she stuffed it in one of her pockets.

Daniel nodded, eyeing the empty stretchers. "Question is, where are they now?"

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Daniel, Jacob and Janet stormed back through the remainders of the destroyed door to where the rest of their team was waiting.

Upon hearing them, Teal'c turned immediately, shooting them a confused gaze. "O'Neill? Major Carter?" he asked curtly.

Daniel heaved a sigh. "Not there anymore," he answered tiredly.

"So, where could they be?" Major Warren asked without looking away from their prisoners.

Daniel rubbed his temples where he felt a massive headache approach. "They _could_ still be somewhere within this structure…" he said hesitantly.

"I hear a 'but' in that," Janet threw in.

Daniel almost groaned out loud. " _But_ chances are good they did indeed notice our scans and transported our friends to some place safer."

Long faces could be seen throughout the room and Jacob cursed violently. In two languages.

"What can we do?" Jacob wanted to know. "We can't hold this basis for long, we don't have enough men."

Daniel's thoughts raced. Indeed, what could they do? He didn't want to just leave, not when they had been so close to rescuing their friends! Then, slowly, a thought took hold of Daniel's attention. If they really had transferred Jack and Sam, then they probably had noted down where to in their computers, wouldn't they? Daniel knew it was only a slim chance, but one he was willing to take nonetheless. If they had a new address then they could still come to their friends help. They just needed to know, where they were.

But how could they access these computers? Daniel had no knowledge of computers, even if he could make guesses at the language they used. Computers had always been more Sam's field of expertise…

Daniel's head shot up. That was it! Completely forgetting all about military protocol Jack had ever taught him, the archaeologist grabbed his radio and called out excitedly: "Colonel Reynolds? This is Doctor Jackson here. We need Doctor Kemp!"

Impatiently, Daniel waited for the Colonel to report back. If Kemp had any possibility of cracking the computers, then maybe Jack and Sam still had a chance…

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Jack woke up groggily. His head pounded with a nasty headache and his mouth was so dry he had difficulties swallowing. Blinking rapidly, one important fact registered with the Colonel. There was light. Light was blinding him. Real light, like sunlight!

Jack shifted and looked up. Indeed, high up over him he was greeted by a clear, blue sky. Fresh, unfiltered air wafted around him and Jack couldn't help but inhale deeply. He was outside! God, how much he had missed the feeling of freedom!

Jack closed his eyes and reveled in the simplicity of his situation. He was outside, lying on his back under the sky, inhaling fresh air. He reached out and felt grass and ferns under his fingers. All around him leaves rustled in the slight gusts of wind ruffling his hair. He had to be in some kind of forest or something like that, he concluded. Jack sighed. The last thing he remembered vividly was being in the hands of the enemy, so how come he was in a forest? Was he dreaming or already hallucinating? Or had he finally gone completely nuts?

Or, also a possibility, had the drugs they'd been feeding him finally done him in and he'd died?

Jack opened his eyes and turned onto his side, intend to sit up and have a good look around. When he rolled around however, he was suddenly presented with a picture he hadn't been expecting and it took all the air from his lungs. He was looking right into Carter's face. Her deathly white face. Her eyes were closed, her mouth hung half open and sweat had slicked her hair to her temples. Frozen, Jack realized that his head was lying on her ribcage and one of her arms was trapped beneath his body.

And then memory came rushing back in. He had managed to get rid of his restraints and had freed her. She had been about to die from her fever and he had raced down uncountable, deserted hallways with her in hope of finding a way out by sheer luck without getting caught beforehand. He remembered crossing some kind of control room that had thankfully been unmanned at that time, he remembered the alarms blaring around him and he remembered hiding with Carter in a few corners to avoid bumping into the aliens when he heard the sound of footsteps approach. He even remembered finally finding stairs that had led up. He had climbed them, staggering from the exhaustion and the weight he had been carrying, but he had stubbornly gone through with it. He had found an exit and had blown it open with some C4. But then? Everything was kinda blurry.

Jack remembered the urge to get to the Stargate, to reach the SGC as fast as possible to save Carter. He somehow remembered staggering through the surrounding forest in a daze, only concentrating on setting one foot in front of the other, but not where he was actually heading. And then… Then he must have lost consciousness somewhere. He didn't remember anything anymore. Exhaustion must have done him in. Horrified, Jack jumped up. _Carter!_

God, how could he have fallen asleep? She needed help! She needed to be brought to the SGC! Frantically, he looked around, trying to estimate the time. How much time had passed? Was it already too late?

Jack crawled up to her face and carefully brushed a hand over her cheek. She was a strange mixture of hot and cold, on one hand ice-cold and on the other hand burning up. He ran his fingers down her neck and pressed them into her throat, searching for her pulse. He almost cried out in relief, when he felt an irregular, unstable thumping beneath his fingers. Slow and sluggish, but still a pulse! _Thank god!_ She still had a chance.

Slowly and with difficulty, Jack stood up and let his eyes travel over the surroundings. Trees, trees and even more trees, wherever he looked. He had no idea, where he was and even less, where the Stargate could be. Still, he had no other possibility than to try for it anyways. He reached down and pulled Sam over his shoulders once again. This time, he stumbled under her weight and his muscles protested. Jack felt tired to the bones and having to carry her weight wasn't helping the aches spreading through his whole body, but he refused to acknowledge them. He would take Carter with him, no matter the cost. Either they would both get home or neither of them. He wouldn't leave her back however. He refused to do that. The thought of Carter alone had been what had kept him sane during imprisonment and the urge to get her to safety was what still had him running.

So he staggered forwards, making his way through the thick underbrush, while praying that he had chosen the right way. Jack didn't know, how long he walked. Eventually, he lost all feeling for time and distance. He simply stumbled on and on without stopping. His harsh breathing echoed in his ears and drowned out all other sounds. He had a death grip on Carter, especially her wrist so he would notice if her heartbeat failed again, and the feeling of her lifeless body against his was what kept him continuing when he felt exhaustion was about to do him in.

Sometime, hunger was gnawing on his insides, after the long times of imprisonment and fighting illnesses a strange feeling he almost wasn't used to anymore, but he ignored it. Stopping to eat meant losing time and time was essential for Carter. Besides, the thirst was way worse.

He fell. Jack didn't know how often and he didn't care. He simply heaved himself up again and marched on. It was logical that he would fall. Even if his eyes managed to pick up on whatever branch or root was catching on his feet, his brain was too sluggish to react in time and he would trip anyways. He would survive, he figured.

Finally, and Jack had no idea how much time had passed, he stumbled out of the forest. In a short distance loomed the Stargate, waiting patiently. Immense relief and gratefulness flooded him. Almost there!

He dragged himself over to the DHD and although the picture blurred in front of his eyes, Jack was pretty sure he'd hit the right coordinates. The Stargate began spinning and the chevrons locked in place. A wormhole established and Jack looked at the blue glittering event horizon relieved. Finally! After weeks of torture, uncertainty and imprisonment they would get to go home!

Jack staggered up the steps to the waiting wormhole and when he reached the event horizon, he halted and put Carter down. He held her upright against his body and checked her vitals once more. Her breathing was so shallow it was barely noticeable and her pulse was skipping beats, not that it had been beating regularly to begin with.

He pulled her against him and laid his arms around her to keep her stable.

"We're goin' home, Carter," he whispered to her. "We're free and going home…"

She twitched and for a moment he hoped she would wake up. But she merely scrunched up her brows, still oblivious to what was happening around her. Jack sighed and not wanting to spend another second on this godforsaken planet, he let himself fall forwards into the event horizon, clutching onto Carter.

It didn't even register with him that he had missed out on sending their ID signal through first.

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Hours after they had stormed the alien basis, Daniel trudged down the ramp in the SGC. General Hammond was waiting for their group and as if it was completely normal, he greeted the Tok'ra. They had decided to return with the Tau'ri to the SGC and give their reports, before heading back to their own home world.

Daniel came to stand next to Teal'c and both waited, until the General turned towards them.

The General raised his eyebrows confused. "So, Doctor Jackson, how come I do not see Colonel O'Neill or Major Carter?" he inquired.

Daniel opened his mouth to answer, when suddenly the alarms rang out.

" _Unscheduled off-world activation!_ " Chief Master Sergeant Harriman immediately called out through the PA system.

The General didn't waste a second. He turned and hurried for the control room while SF's stormed in, pointing their weapons at the swirling Stargate and all assembled were ushered out of the 'Gate room. Daniel and Teal'c exchanged a quick glance and then rushed after the General.

"Sergeant?" the General questioned the moment Daniel and Teal'c arrived in the control room.

Harriman couldn't even answer before the monitors were flashing red, displaying several warnings.

"What's happening?" Daniel asked breathlessly.

"We're getting an incoming wormhole from a planet that's marked as insecure and has been taken off the roster," Harriman explained. "The automatic security programs are overriding all standard operating programs."

Daniel gnawed on his lower lip in concentration. "What planet?" he asked.

Harriman glanced at the display. "P3T-643," he reported.

Daniel's stomach lurched painfully. God, that was the planet they had just come from! For a moment he believed those alien to have come after them, but then he dismissed the thought. Since Kinsey had assured that the planet had been taken off the list of operational planets, they had been unable to come back to Earth directly. They had had to make a detour over an uninhabited planet to reach Earth, so even if those aliens had followed them – which Daniel believed to be highly unlikely, since they had seemed more than glad when they had finally left and hadn't put up a fight against them – then they had had no means of knowing which planet they had returned to. They couldn't have Earth's address. Actually, there were only two individuals on that planet that knew Earth's address and would try to dial it directly. Jack and Sam. If those aliens hadn't managed to get the address out of the two officers, then chances were high that this were their friends trying to get back! Horrified Daniel understood what that meant.

He watched as the displays flashed the warning to close the iris. He knew that if Harriman failed to follow through, the iris would close automatically in a few seconds. Only General Hammond or a senior officer could overrule the program with his authorization code.

"General!" Daniel cried out immediately. "This is–!"

The General lifted his hand, interrupting Daniel's protest. "I know, Doctor Jackson," he said gravely, apparently fully understanding the situation. "Still, there is nothing I can do."

"But you could–!" Daniel tried anew, but he knew it was futile even as he fought. The General was military and bound by a direct order. He couldn't disregard a presidential order only on the assumption that it _could_ be their friends, who were about to be crushed by the iris.

And to make matters worse, Harriman said: "Receiving no IDC."

Daniel cursed and raked a hand through his hair in frustration.

"General Hammond, I believe it is–" Teal'c tried, but the General wasn't listening.

"Close the iris!" he ordered.

Harriman nodded and reached forwards to lay his hand on the scanner that would activate the iris. Desperate, Daniel watched the huge titanium shield slide in place, for the first time since Sam and Jack had gone MIA hoping against all odds that it were not his friends trying to get home…

* * *

 _A/N: So, I know this is an unfair place to let it end for now, but the chapter was long enough as it was so I decided to split it up to be able to update faster._


	9. Observing

_Again, thank you all for reading and following, and all reviewers for their kind words!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Nine – Observing_

"Close the iris!" General Hammond ordered.

Sergeant Harriman placed his hand on the scanner and the impenetrable shield closed over the shimmering event horizon. Daniel fidgeted nervously, in danger to bite open his lower lip he was worrying. He just knew who was trying to return through that wormhole and the thought of his friends getting smashed by the titanium shield was downright hurting him. Daniel frantically wished there would be anything he could still do for his friends, knowing all the while he couldn't.

Then, suddenly, the iris retracted. Stunned they all watched the wormhole reappear.

"I said to close the iris!" General Hammond repeated.

"I know, sir," Harriman assured him. "But I can't! We're getting an error message."

"What kind of error?" Daniel asked curiously.

"Unknown," the Sergeant replied tensely.

"Well, the security programs will close the iris anyways, won't they?" General Hammond inquired.

Harriman shook his head nervously. "Security programs have been overridden, sir," he reported nervously.

"How is that possible?" General Hammond wondered incredulous. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but they were working flawless until a second ago?"

"They were, sir," the Sergeant confirmed.

"So, how–?" Daniel began, but interrupted himself almost immediately.

Something fell out of the wormhole. A bulky shape crashed onto the ramp in front of the Stargate and remained there unmoving. The wormhole disengaged and with that, all running processes shut down. The alarms shut off and eerie silence reigned in the control room as well as the 'Gate room.

Daniel stood on his toes and peered down into the control room, when the first SF's approached the still figure. There was a lot of dirt, filth and grime that blurred anything recognizable, but still Daniel could make out limbs and guessed it to be human.

One of the SF's bent down and tugged at what Daniel believed to be an arm. He pushed against the figure and suddenly it seemed to split. The SF recoiled and then he shouted up, clearly audible through the intercom: "It's Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter!"

By now, Daniel didn't understand a thing anymore, but right now, he couldn't care less, either. Shutting down his confused brain for once, he jumped for the next phone and called for a medical team. Jack and Sam seemed to be in dire need of one.

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Daniel stood together with Teal'c and General Hammond on the viewing platform of the isolation room. Jacob and Anise were with them, but both hadn't said a word until now. Malek, Sina and Marnon had given a brief report on the mission before returning to their current home world, but General Hammond had put all further debriefings off for the time being. The medical states of the returned officers were more pressing right now.

Speaking of them, beneath them in the isolation room lay the unconscious figures of Jack and Sam, hooked up to uncountable wires and machines, while Janet and her medical team fretted around them.

By now, Daniel felt utterly exhausted, even if he knew that not much time had passed since they had begun treatment. Rubbing his bleary eyes, Daniel gazed down. Jack occupied the left bed, the one closest to the sealed shut doors. Janet had no means of knowing what had happened to the two officers until their bloodwork came back, so they had been put into isolation and under guard for the time being. Absentmindedly, Daniel's eyes roamed over his friend's familiar shape, taking in all the differences from the last time he'd seen him. Jack's normally tanned skin had disappeared under a layer of dirt and sweat that made his skin appear more grayish. His hair was a wild mess and dark circles lay under his eyes. Both upper arms of the Colonel were ripped open, dried blood crusting over undoubtedly nasty wounds that a nurse attempted to clean at the moment. Trails of blood had flown down his arms and left a mess of caked blood on the limbs. His lips were cracked open from the dehydration and an IV was attached to his veins to take care of the fluid loss. But astonishingly, he didn't seem to have lost any weight. From what Daniel could see Jack's BDUs were still seizing nicely over his lean body.

Machines were watching over the Colonel's vitals, but while the man was out cold, his heart rate, pulse, blood pressure, body temperature and oxygen level were all alright, from what Daniel could see. Sam, on the other hand, was a whole other story. The Major was deathly pale, almost white, rivalling the standard white sheets of the infirmary. The only difference Daniel could make out were the dark circles under her eyes, the angry red patches on her cheeks that hinted on her fever and the dreary spots, where sweat had dulled her normally bright blonde hair to an almost brown color. And none of her vitals were as they should be. Her body temperature was too high, her blood pressure too low. Her oxygen levels had been almost worrying, so an oxygen mask was covering her mouth and nose, an attached machine helping her to breathe. She was also hooked up to IV's that dripped fluids and medication into her veins. Around her upper arms were two metal cuffs much like the one Janet had picked up in the alien basis' cell from where trails of dried blood led down her arms.

Daniel raked a hand through his hair, noting absentmindedly that he had to look pretty similar to Jack by now. God, what had just happened to his friends…?

Next to the archaeologist, as if mirroring his thoughts, General Hammond sighed.

"Tiring situation, huh, General?" Daniel murmured in a weak attempt to make conversation.

The General smiled, but it turned out rather drained. "It could be worse, I suppose," he answered. "At least they were able to make it back on their own."

Yeah, Daniel thought wryly. With Jack dragging a half-dead Sam through the Stargate. By the grim expression on Janet's face when the Doctor had laid eyes on the genius astrophysicist Daniel had known immediately that the situation was serious.

The General turned towards Daniel. "Doctor Jackson, have you any idea yet, what could have happened?"

Daniel took a moment to consider the question and glanced towards Teal'c. "I'm not exactly sure." he admitted.

The General smiled placating. "I asked for ideas, not for facts, son."

Daniel inhaled. "We found the cell they were holding Jack and Sam in…" he began cautiously.

"It appeared to be a laboratory of some sorts," Teal'c added.

The General raised an eyebrow inquisitively. "So you wanna tell me my officers were being used as guinea pigs?"

"We don't know yet," Daniel explained. "Doctor Kemp managed to find files on Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter in what we've assumed to be a control room and he succeeded in transferring them onto a portable device he'd brought. So with some luck we have all information we need on their medical states, but I wasn't able to read the language, so it may take some time to translate the files…"

"But all in all, my officers were used for experiments?" the General insisted.

"Most likely," Daniel had to admit.

The General pursed his lips affronted. "I don't like that," he stated. "And I'm sure the higher-ups won't like it, either."

Daniel almost snorted. Those higher-ups could go fuck themselves as far as Daniel was concerned. First they didn't care enough about _their_ officers to continue searching for them, then they practically banned them from coming back – only a miraculous coincidence had assured Jack and Sam were indeed still alive – and then they dared to be upset at what had happened to them? Pretty hypocritical, wasn't it?

Down in the isolation room an alarm began to sound out suddenly. Daniel leaned forwards anxiously when the sounds reached them through the room's intercom and saw Jack's body convulse, his tense body shaking with muscle spasms. Immediately, Janet was at his side, holding his head stable – or rather trying to hold his head – so the Colonel wouldn't hurt himself. The Doctor shouted for medicaments and a nurse hurried to fulfill the order. Two male nurses stepped up to help Janet and pressed down Jack's arms and legs when he began trashing, the danger too high that he could knock over some needed equipment or injure himself somehow. The nurse injected the medicament into Jack's IV, which washed it directly into his blood circulation. After a moment the Colonel stilled and his vitals returned to the target values.

Daniel swallowed harshly, when the man finally collapsed back into his bed, his unconscious body lying once more still and unmoving. Oh god, what the hell was happening to his friends?

The General turned once again to Daniel. "Doctor Jackson, I know you'll want to wait and see how your friends are doing and by all means, please do so. But whenever you're ready to begin, I want those files translated. As soon as possible. If you need anything, let me know."

"Yes, sir," Daniel agreed.

" _General?_ " Anise suddenly cut in unexpected. General Hammond nodded at her, indicating for her to go on. " _I'd like to stay and help, if that would be okay. I am a scientist and may perhaps be able to help with the files_."

"You are always welcome to stay at the base as long as you wish," the General stated diplomatically. "But whether or not your help will be needed you have to discuss with the lead scientist."

With this he pointed at Daniel. Anise nodded.

"I'm not even going to ask to stay," Jacob declared gruffly from his corner. Daniel was aware that pretty much nothing could and would get the former General away from the sickbed of his only daughter.

"I assumed as much," General Hammond answered understandingly.

And together the four man and one woman continued to watch the unconscious figures of their friends, while the base's CMO tried her best to cure them.

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Daniel had pretty much taken up residence on the viewing platform, the few chairs lining the narrow space littered with print-outs and scribbled notes. He, as well as Teal'c, had flat out refused to leave their posts, when it became obvious that Sam's and Jack's states weren't going to change much soon. So Doctor Kemp had taken to bring Daniel whatever he had achieved to decipher from the data they had brought back. Since then SG-1's linguist occupied himself with trying to figure out the alien language. He trusted on Teal'c and all the medical equipment Sam and Jack were hooked up to to notify him of the slightest change. The silence reigning between the friends on the viewing platform was only interrupted by Daniel's occasional mumbling and the scratching sounds of his pencil moving over the paper, jotting down notes on the foreign language.

"Hm," Daniel frowned suddenly, sounding displeased.

"Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked quietly from where he'd stood unmoving for uncountable passed hours.

Daniel tapped his pencil thoughtfully against the sheet of paper he was holding. "It's not really making sense…" he grumbled. "Either I've made a mistake somewhere or I'm missing out on some crucial information…"

"Maybe it would be helpful to ask either Anise or Jacob Carter if they have knowledge of this certain language," Teal'c suggested.

Daniel let his eyes wander aimlessly and, unsurprisingly, they gyrated towards his unconscious friends. Much to Daniel's dismay, their states hadn't changed at all. Jack was still overcome by unpredictable spasms from time to time and Sam was still fighting a high fever.

"I've asked Anise, but she's never seen anything like this language," Daniel answered slowly. "I could ask Jacob, but I think I'll wait until he's returned, when General Hammond finally got him to leave and eat…"

Daniel interrupted himself, trailing off in the middle of the sentence without noticing. Slowly, he pushed the sheets on his lap aside and stood up, his eyes transfixed to the two figures lying in the isolation room below.

"Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked again.

Daniel stepped up to the thick protection glass that let him look down into the isolation room. "I thought I saw something…" he said, now insecure. He hadn't imagined it, had he?

Suddenly, Sam twitched. Daniel saw her body tense and her hand, hidden underneath the white blanket, jerk abruptly.

"Teal'c, did you see that?" Daniel asked, slightly breathless.

"Indeed, Daniel Jackson. Major Carter seems to move," the Jaffa concluded, sounding his usual self.

A grin spread across Daniel's face. It was the first move any of his friends had done since they'd fallen out of the Stargate and he was inclined to see that as a good sign.

Until everything went haywire. Suddenly, alarms were going off, echoing throughout the viewing platform from the intercom. Daniel's mouth went dry, when he saw the monitor that was placed next to the woman he considered a sister flash in a frequency that practically screamed emergency. Although Daniel was a Doctor, he had no medical knowledge whatsoever, but even to him, it was pretty obvious that something was very wrong.

Heart pounding fast and heavy, Daniel powerlessly watched the doors to the isolation room burst open and medical personnel file in, Janet being the first one at Sam's side. Glued to his spot, Daniel watched Janet bark out orders he couldn't understand in the chaos of voices and sounds the intercom conveyed to them, and nurses rushing to fulfill the commands. One of the nurses injected something directly into Sam's vein, not even sparing a glance at the IV that still supplied her with fluids. Janet almost yanked her stethoscope from her neck and checked Sam's heartbeat, her eyes raptly watching her vitals displayed on the monitor. By the frown marring her pretty face Daniel knew she wasn't pleased with the results she was getting.

Janet was saying something to the nurse standing beside her and unexpectedly, Daniel saw Jack react to the turmoil around him. Slowly, the older man's eyes blinked open, staring forwards unseeing. Daniel didn't know how much the Colonel actually was aware of, he rather seemed to drift in and out of consciousness, while only a few inches next to him, Sam was fighting.

All of a sudden the alarms changed; changed into a dreaded, constant and persistent sound. Daniel felt his heart sink with fear. She was flat-lining. Sam's heart had stopped.

Now movement down in the isolation room got frantic. A nurse wheeled a defibrillator over and with quick, used movements Janet got it operational. Next to her, nurses rid Sam of the cover and the hospital clothes she wore, baring her chest. Janet called out and all nurses jumped back, while the CMO stepped forwards and pressed the paddles down on Sam's chest. Her body did a violent jerk, rising up from the bed underneath her, before she fell back limply. For a moment everyone seemed to hold their breath, staring transfixed at the monitor showing Sam's heartbeat. Daniel bumped his nose against the glass, when he stepped further up, willing himself to see what was happening over the heads of all nurses standing around his friends bed.

The steady shrieking of the alarms continued unfazed. Daniel closed his eyes briefly. He knew, what it meant. No reaction from Sam. Still no heartbeat.

Again Janet shocked her and again, they all prayed for Sam to respond. Daniel actually saw a sudden spike on the monitor, but then it fell flat again. He wanted to scream.

The movements grew slower in the isolation room. Janet was working up the machine a third time, but the nurses' reactions were slackening noticeably. Daniel realized that they deemed it highly unlikely that anything could change the third time around. They already believed Sam to be… Daniel gulped strained. He couldn't even think it! This couldn't be happening! They had just gotten her back. She had just escaped, had just returned with Jack. Daniel couldn't bear the thought that he could lose her now when she'd finally come back, when she was finally safe…

Janet was about to place the paddles on Sam's chest once more, when suddenly another movement caught Daniel's attention. Completely unexpected, Jack rose. He sat up with tense moves and then almost toppled down from his bed in his try to get to his feet. Surprised, Daniel watched him stagger towards Sam's bed. He was swaying remarkably as if his legs weren't able to hold his weight upright anymore. His IV ripped from his vein and he began to bleed onto the ground, but apparently, he didn't notice. The wires connecting him to his surveilling machines fell, torn from his body when he moved out of their range. Another alarm began blaring when the machines lost the connection to Jack and the nurses became aware of him.

Two nurses stepped up to him, trying to hinder him from getting any closer to where Janet worked on Sam. Jack didn't seem to notice, though. He just continued as if nobody was actually talking to him, as if there were no hands trying to hold him back.

Janet frowned at him and then obviously commanded the Colonel to stay back, wary of the electrically charged paddles she was holding. Again, Jack ignored everything around him. Daniel actually wondered if the other man did even register these people talking to him or if he just operated on instinct alone, running on autopilot.

Jack reached out and laid a hand flat on the skin on Sam's chest. Daniel had no idea, what was happening and he couldn't see anything either, but he clearly heard the surprised gasps and the outcries from the nurses below. And then one of the ongoing alarms died off, changing into the regular beeping the machine should emit. Daniel exhaled relieved, not even having realized he'd been holding his breath in the first place, when the monitor attached to Sam showed off a regular heartbeat once more.

"God…!" Daniel whispered shakily, his eyes glued to the rising and falling line on the monitor indicating Sam's steady heartbeat. He'd never seen anything as beautiful. She was alive, again! Saved at the last minute by some miracle unknown to Daniel. He didn't particularly care, though, as long as she was fine.

Daniel watched as Jack's hand that still lay on her pale skin slowly began to move, when she took up breathing once more. Janet began to hastily examine her friend, but the clearly relieved expression on her face told Daniel that they'd just evaded a very close call.

The archaeologist scrubbed a hand through his hair, feeling utterly exhausted. Sam's little stunt had taken a considerable emotional toll on him and he closed his eyes for a second, trying to calm his racing heart and his uneasy body. When he opened his eyes again he could see that Jack had dropped right next to Sam's bed, his large frame lying unmoving on the ground. Nurses were checking his pulse and covering the wound the IV needle had caused, but their unhurried movements told Daniel that he didn't need to worry anew. Jack had simply fallen unconscious again.

Daniel raised his eyebrows confused. What the hell had just happened down there? Somehow, he had the strangest feeling that it had been more than he had witnessed.

Janet finally stepped back from Sam and nurses began to tend to the unconscious Major. The CMO scribbled something onto the clipboard hanging on the end of her bed, taking notes on her medical state, but when Janet stepped back from the bed, she looked up and her gaze locked with Daniel's. She looked grim, an expression Daniel had only seen her wearing when she was confronted with a difficult problem. And suddenly, Daniel had the fleeting feeling that problems were just beginning…

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 _A/N: Short chapter for once. So I should be back soon with more…_


	10. Discussing

_Again, thank you all for reading, following and, of course, reviewing!_

 _ **Author's note**_ _: As promised, a faster update and finally, we're getting down to the reasons behind the alien's behavior. This chapter, as well as the next one, will hopefully clear up a lot of things. However, the explanations grew rather long, again, so I had to split it up into two chapters. Don't know why, but the chapters for this story tended to get quite long._

 _And I wanted to let you know of a few things. First of all, this story is already finished. I have it typed out completely already, though I'm still proof-reading, line-editing and spell-checking. And it's long. So far the longest thing I've written. And actually, the aliens don't play much of a role in the story. They're not even the main enemy. You'll soon see, why. And all the time, the relationship between Jack and Sam is and was my main focus in this story, even if we still have to get to that point._

 _And with this said, on with the show…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Ten – Discussing_

Daniel yawned and scrubbed roughly over his tired eyes. Almost on habitual reaction nowadays, his hands reached out for the coffee mug standing in front of him and he practically inhaled the scorching hot coffee, not caring if he perhaps burned his tongue. The coffee was so strong it actually didn't taste any good but Daniel had forgone the taste long ago. At the moment, caffeine was simply a means for him to stay awake. And he had been running on that stuff for how long exactly now?

Daniel glanced at his watch. Oh, Monday already? That made it a little over a week…

A little over a week since Sam and Jack had returned in their critical state. A little over a week the archaeologist had spent locked up on the viewing platform of their isolation room, alternating between translating the alien files on his friends and arguing with Janet, if he could visit his friends instead of only watching them from afar. So far he'd lost all those arguments. At least he had been more successful in translating those files Kemp had cracked for them. In fact he had made enough progress for General Hammond to call this rather impromptu briefing.

Daniel looked down the rows at the people silently waiting for the General to arrive. Teal'c, Freya and Jacob all looked something between composed and carefully guarded, but neither of them in any way tired. Their symbiotes assured that they didn't feel the exhaustion the days of little sleep would cause in their bodies. Daniel felt inclined to envy them, when his weary eyes began aching once more. They had all stayed with him almost the entire time, but none of them actually had to nap in those hard plastic chairs in the viewing room. They just were no replacement for a real bed, even if Daniel vehemently refused to leave his post to get a few hours of decent rest, no matter how little sleep he ran on.

The only one of their little assembly that looked even worse than Daniel himself was Janet. Dark circles hung under the good Doctor's bleary eyes and while her military training visibly fought the exhaustion taking hold of her body, Daniel thought he'd seen her sway slightly once or twice.

The only one looking indeed halfway rested, even if he had undoubtedly pulled a few all-nighters himself, was Doctor Kemp who sat next to Janet, fiddling absentmindedly with a data stick he'd brought. Actually, the search and rescue teams in charge of the mission to bring back Jack and Sam should have all been present for this briefing, too, but an urgent mission had forced SG-3 and SG-15 to go off-world a few hours prior. They had stayed on-world for this briefing and ironically, had then been the only teams General Hammond could have send when an emergency occurred. At least, SG-15 had left Doctor Kemp back to participate in the briefing. Daniel knew General Hammond had briefly considered calling SG's 8 and 21 to the briefing but he would have to do another meeting with SG's 3 and 15 anyways, so he had decided to stick with the bare minimum of needed people for this initial briefing.

General Hammond entered the briefing room, nodding at all assembled. Janet stood routinely, but her movements were sluggish. The General motioned for her to sit down again and she complied wordlessly.

"So," the General began. "We have been through a few hard weeks…"

Hesitant nods were seen over the table, grim faces telling of the still fresh memories they were remembering.

"But from what I've heard, the situation's finally stabilizing and so I'd like to hear, where we're standing right now," the General continued gently. He seemed well aware of the drained state most of the people sitting at this table were operating on.

"Doctor Fraiser?" the General prompted softly.

Janet nodded and cast a quick glance at the thick folders lying in front of her. Daniel knew it were Jack's and Sam's medical files.

After a moment of hesitation, Janet concluded: "They're getting better, sir."

Relieved sighs were heard all around the briefing table, when the CMO continued: "Colonel O'Neill's spasms have finally subsided, mostly, and Major Carter's fever has finally gone down to bearable temperatures. All wounds they had have healed nicely and without complications. They're both still unconscious however."

"That's good news," the General smiled and from the corner of his eyes, Daniel saw Jacob run a hand over his face groggily, but with a relieved smile. Janet, however, hesitated once more.

"Janet?" Daniel questioned, when he picked up on the little sign of uncertainty.

She sighed. "I'm not sure," she admitted. "Of course I'm relieved they're doing better but I fear they're still some way from recovering completely."

She shot an apologetic gaze towards Jacob, before stating: "It's their blood tests that are worrying me."

"What's wrong with their blood tests?" Jacob inquired immediately.

Janet took a few sheets of paper out of the folders and laid them out on the table. Daniel looked at them, but he couldn't really make much out of the medical results, even if he deemed the furious red circles Janet had drawn around several markers a bad sign.

Freya's eyes closed briefly and then Anise took hold of one of the sheets, her eyes scanning the contents with a decidedly unamused expression on her face. This didn't bode well, either, Daniel concluded.

"Fraiser, I'm no Doctor!" Jacob reminded the CMO impatiently.

Janet nodded understandingly. "I've taken blood samples of Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter every day. What you're currently looking at are the first results I got back. They show worrying abnormalities. And much to my dismay they haven't gotten that much better until now."

Janet pointed to the paper still lying on the table. "These are Major Carter's results. They are showing an unusual high amount of white blood cells, which is an indicator for an infection her body is fighting. Her high fever would be another. And her whole mineral parameters are off the chart. The values of metals and proteins in her blood are completely messed up."

"What does this mean?" Jacob asked, frowning.

"Each human body normally possesses a certain amount of metals and proteins it needs to function. But almost none of Major Carter's parameters are anywhere I would consider healthy anymore. And I even found a few substances I can't place, so I would assume them to be alien," Janet explained, shrugging. "I have no means of knowing but I assume she's gotten something alien transferred to her body."

"Actually…" Doctor Kemp cut in hurriedly. "I could shed some light into that."

He stood up and went to the front, hooking up his data stick to the large monitor. An image flickered to life and gasping, Daniel gazed onto a familiar picture: Jack and Sam bound on the two metal tables they had found in their cells, their bodies restricted by thick bands running across their frames and their whole equipment strapped down with them. Neither of them seemed conscious for they both had their eyes closed and stayed too still to be sleeping.

"After some digging I found video data," Kemp explained needlessly. "They recorded the whole time."

Wordlessly, they all watched as the Jack on the screen slowly came to. He seemed to assess his surroundings, his alert eyes observing his environment scrupulously. He detected that he still had all his weapons with him – a fact that left Daniel's brain racing – and then tried to take hold of them to free himself. To Daniel's wonder however he was barely able to move enough to breathe with those bands restricting him and finally, he gave up. Then the Colonel noticed Sam next to him and Daniel saw him call out to her on the screen, but apparently in vain. She wasn't reacting to him.

At that point, they all watched a few of those aliens enter their cell, the red one Daniel, Janet and Jacob had found dead in their cell in the front. The aliens spoke in their unknown language and thanks to days worth of working through it, Daniel actually understood bits and pieces of their conversation. The Jack on screen however did not. He frowned. Then the aliens asked him something and he answered with his familiar sarcasm, apparently unimpressed by the whole situation, but also completely missing the point. The aliens seemed vastly impressed that he spoke to them, even if they apparently had no idea, what he was talking about. Daniel watched their reactions – or what little reaction they let themselves show – to Jack's answer. If he didn't know it any better, he'd say they hadn't expected the Colonel to be able to answer. But why not? Jack and Sam were humanoid, just like them, so why would the aliens assume they couldn't speak? Or was it the fact that they were able to speak in a language rather than the fact that they could produce sound? Because as far as sound went, animals could produce that, too. But a language? That was something completely else. But just like Jack hadn't understood them, the aliens had had no means of knowing what he'd said, too. Even when they had noticed that he was indeed using a language. And perhaps this was what they hadn't expected. But why not? Daniel gnawed on his lip in deep thought. He had the impression the answer to that riddle was important, but just like it had been with translating the alien language, Daniel felt he was still missing out on some information.

"What are they doing now?" General Hammond asked into Daniel's thoughts.

Daniel looked up to the screen and saw an alien device sweep over Jack and Sam, Jack observing it with a skeptical gaze.

"I'd say they are scanning them," Kemp answered, slightly insecure, while shooting gazes towards Janet in the hopes of support.

But it was Daniel who answered when he suddenly remembered something. "Actually, I think I've read something about this…!" he said, before ploughing through his notes and translations, cursing himself for not taking the time to bring them in order. Flipping through the various notes he'd brought, Daniel finally grabbed onto the paper he'd searched for.

"Scans… scans…" he murmured absentmindedly, while quickly skipping over his notes to find the place he was thinking of. "Ah, there!"

He looked up again and found all eyes keen on him. "They really did scans on Sam and Jack," Daniel began explaining. "Actually, they analyzed their complete physique, including bloodwork."

Puzzled, his companions around the table stared at him.

"Why would they do this?" General Hammond asked lastly what seemed written in the faces of nearly all present.

Daniel tapped his fingers against the table, his brain racing. Actually, now it all started to finally make sense. To be exact, all information he had needed had been there the whole time but with Daniel's state of constant exhaustion, he'd failed to put the pieces together. But maybe he'd finally thought of the missing piece he had needed to unravel the riddle.

"Because they have never seen another race before," Daniel explained slowly. "From what I've read they had no idea what the Stargate was for, even though they are an advanced race. It had simply never activated as long as they could think back, until we sent our MALP through."

"So what?" Jacob asked. "They kidnapped Sam and Jack to study another race?"

"Mostly, yes," Daniel agreed.

"But why?" Janet inquired. "From what I have seen, those aliens have a similar physique than we have. They are human, too."

"Mostly, yes," Daniel repeated.

"Mostly?" Janet immediately inquired.

"Um, yeah," Daniel said, scratching his head distractedly. "They once were probably like us, but in their… development, they lost a few important… traits."

"Could you be a little more exact, Doctor Jackson?" General Hammond demanded mildly.

"Of course," Daniel complied instantly, his brain racing faster to connect the dots he'd observed than he could explain his thoughts to his audience. "I have translated most of the medical files they created of Sam and Jack and I noticed that they compared their physical data, but I had no clue to what exactly. But now I think it's their own physical traits. They noticed the similarities to our team when we arrived at their planet and they also noticed the differences."

"What differences?" Janet asked concentrated.

Daniel pointed towards the monitor, where Kemp had frozen the picture so they wouldn't miss something while Daniel explained his discoveries. It showed the red alien facing off with the Colonel.

"Those aliens are short and slim. Their bodies almost contain no fat cells anymore. There's almost no mimic and their movements are strangely edgy. And coupled with those odd body suits they're all wearing…" Daniel looked up earnestly towards General Hammond. "General, I think they're developing backwards."

There was a short moment of silence, before Anise cut in, her scientific curiosity clearly picked. " _Developing backwards?_ "

Daniel nodded heavily. He knew he was just doing some assumptions from his observations but he also knew he was right with this. "From what we've seen, they're fairly developed technologically. But we haven't found anything nearly resembling a weapon. They didn't even seem to know what the weapons we brought were for, and then they left Jack and Sam with their whole equipment! So I assume they never had any foes at all, not even natural foes as the planet seems to have only sparse animal life and–"

"Bottom line, Doctor Jackson," General Hammond cut him short, when Daniel was about to lose himself in speculations. Daniel changed sentences without blinking an eye. He was used to Jack's interruptions, so the General cutting him off wasn't fazing him that much.

"They never had the need to defend themselves. They were living a happy, lazy life, their advancing technology taking over more and more for them. They didn't _need_ to do _anything_ for themselves anymore! And it made their bodies re-develop. Their muscles were building back until they were unable to function properly anymore. That's why their bodies are so small and thin. And I think those body suits help them move, taking over for their failing muscular system," Daniel elaborated.

" _Then it must have been… surprising to see humans actually walking on their own._ ", Anise commented.

Daniel nodded again. "And from what I've discovered, the aliens saw it as their great chance. They could study them and see what they could do to reverse the process that was happening to them."

Janet shook her head, deep in thought. "If they are indeed similar to us, then that isn't possible," she stated. "You can train muscles that have been inactive for a certain amount of time, but muscle tissue that isn't there anymore can't be trained."

" _It is even possible that with passing time such a deficiency is incorporated in the very DNA of the race,_ " Anise agreed. " _They would become unable to actually build up muscle. Their bodies would be stuck on the bare minimum of muscle tissue and be dependent on external help systems forever._ "

"So whatever they were experimenting with on Sam and Jack wouldn't help them at all!" Jacob exclaimed frustrated. "Why torture them then?"

"Maybe they have found another use for O'Neill and Major Carter," Teal'c said, for the first time actually speaking in the conversation. He sounded grim and furious.

"Unfortunately, I think Teal'c's right," Daniel agreed. "Kemp, let the video continue."

The other Doctor pressed a button and quietly, the room watched as Jack got something injected and fell unconscious once more.

"Fast-forward," Daniel commanded and again, Kemp complied. For seconds nothing happened, then Sam awoke. Daniel didn't say anything and so Kemp let the video go on. For a while there was only Sam seen, her head tilting left and right to take in her surroundings since it was about the only thing she could still move. Then Jack woke up again. The video continued, showing the officers of SG-1 talking. Then the aliens came back and without Daniel having to say anything, Kemp stopped the video. They watched as metal cuffs were placed around Jack's and Sam's upper arms, before they were hooked up to various cables and wires. The aliens touched something on the cuffs and they activated. Suddenly, they all saw both officers twitch under their restraints, their bodies going tense, and then blood flowed freely from under the cuffs.

"What happened?" General Hammond asked astonished while they watched the two officers trying to cope with what seemed to be rough pain.

Janet was the one to answer. "My team and I have analyzed those cuffs," she said.

When the General turned towards her with a questioning gaze, the CMO explained: "Colonel O'Neill didn't have them with him anymore when they returned but when we were on P3T-643, I found a cuff in their cell that I assume was his. Major Carter however still had hers with her. In fact, Sergeant Siler had to cut them from her arms, because they were pretty tight."

Janet snatched a sheet of paper from Daniel across the table and without asking, she turned it over and began to scribble on the backside. She drew a circle and then attached various lines to it so that it looked like sun drawn inwards.

"This is a rough sketch of the cuff," she described. "On the outside are holes to attach cables and wires, just as you've seen on the video, but on the inside, there are numerous needles of various sizes that shoot out when the device is activated…"

Several winces rang out along the table, when the people currently present imagined the pain that had to cause. Janet continuing to talk wasn't making it any better: "…those needles embed into the veins, the flesh and the muscle."

Daniel was suddenly glad there was nothing in his stomach but coffee.

Janet went on, unimpressed by the uneasiness that had overtaken her companions: "I assume those cuffs are needed to transfer… _substances_ to the prisoners. Um… anesthetics, medication or drugs, for example."

Now it was Doctor Kemp's turn to cut in: "Doctor Fraiser is right," he agreed. "Mostly, anyways."

Daniel opened his mouth to ask what the other man meant, when the Doctor motioned towards the monitor. Simultaneously, they all turned and were greeted with the picture of Jack and Sam writhing under some blue energy that danced over their bodies. Their restraints ensured they couldn't trash from the pain, but their overstretched heads with their tightly shut eyes and the suffering expressions on their faces were indication enough to know that it had to hurt like hell. Daniel winced in sympathy, when he understood that he just saw his friends getting tortured with some kind of energy akin to electricity.

Sam was the first one to give in. She slumped into her restraints, unconscious, the Colonel following her not long after. The aliens had stopped the electricity the moment the Major had given in and now Daniel could see them leave the cell on the video with something akin to a fat smile gracing their unmoving faces. Daniel wanted to throw something, so angry did he feel. Astonished, he noticed that his fingers had curled into fists on the table, his fingernails almost cutting into his hands.

"What was _that_?" the archaeologist growled under his breath.

Kemp sighed exhausted. "A system check," he answered glumly.

" _A system check?!_ " Jacob yelled uncontrolled. "What do you mean, a system check?!"

Kemp twitched uneasily with the pretty expected anger he was facing. "As far as I can tell, the aliens only tried if the devices would work on their prisoners," he explained ruefully.

Jacob crossed his arms in front of his chest, his eyes shooting dangerous sparks and his jaw working restlessly while the older man tried to get his rage under control. Undoubtedly, Selmak was having her hands full to calm the retired General down.

"Let's continue," General Hammond decided, probably to divert Jacob's attention. In hindsight, Daniel wondered if that had really succeeded.

Kemp fast-forwarded the tape once more and again, they all watched. They watched as the cuffs activated and a sticky substance got transferred to Jack and Sam, neither of them actually noticing, because they were still unconscious.

"It seems to be something like nourishment…" Janet theorized while observing the substance with analyzing eyes.

"What makes you think that?" Jacob asked.

"Well," Janet said matter-of-factly. "Something kept Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter alive and I haven't seen anything resembling actual food more than that."

Daniel scrunched up his face. He thought the commissary's oatmeal gruel looked more appetizing than that stuff, but at least the substance his friends had gotten fed had ensured they had survived, and for that he was grateful.

"The scans they've done probably told them what Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter would need in order to survive," Janet speculated.

This made Daniel actually remember something. He went through his notes again and found a list within his translations. He gave the list to the CMO and raising a perfectly shaped brow, Janet scanned the contents quickly with used movements. Then she nodded reluctantly. "It's a list of nutrients. Basically all an average human needs to survive," she said. "Only the amount they've received is worrying. I assume those aliens had no means of knowing how much a Tau'ri human actually needs, so they've given them the portions a prisoner of their race would probably get."

"And that means?" General Hammond wanted to know.

Janet looked up shortly, before letting her eyes wander over the list in front of her absentmindedly once more. "Well sir, I'd say Major Carter would have been able to make do with the amount somehow, but I fear it's way too little for someone like Colonel O'Neill. He would have needed much more. So right now I'm seriously at a loss, why he hasn't earnestly lost a lot of weight…"

"Maybe there will be an explanation, if we continue to watch the video," Teal'c cut in.

Daniel shot a quick glance at his friend. The Jaffa almost hadn't said a thing during the whole conversation and the archaeologist wondered if everything was alright. Teal'c sat ramrod straight with a dark expression on his face Daniel hadn't seen all too often. Obviously the large Jaffa was fighting for control as much as Sam's dad was. Suddenly, Daniel had the vague impression that those aliens had no idea what powerful enemies they had provoked by capturing and torturing Jack and Sam.

Kemp let the video continue and then Daniel had to sit through seemingly endless minutes of Jack getting tormented with electricity. Daniel felt his eyes burn with a telltale wetness, while the video tape raced through uncountable times they subjected the Colonel to this… treatment. Daniel saw his friend's body twitch and tense under the restraints and noticed how his eyes pressed shut tightly with the pain that wrecked his body, and he observed the anguish and fear that haunted Sam while she had to watch, similar to what they were doing right now all around the briefing table. It hurt, simply from watching.

Then, suddenly, Kemp halted the video. Daniel glanced around the table quickly and noticed grim, almost hateful expressions on several faces. Only Janet and Anise looked carefully guarded and Kemp seemed slightly overtaken by what he had to witness, a hand resting warily on his stomach. By now Teal'c and Jacob looked positively murderous and even General Hammond showed an unusually grim expression.

Poor Jack, Daniel thought sympathetically. No wonder he'd been unconscious for about a week. If that had continued through his whole imprisonment, then his body seriously had needed time to recover.

" _Why are they doing this?_ " Anise asked suddenly, her voice sounding as unfazed as possible, even if Daniel suspected that she wasn't totally unaffected at seeing Jack being put through this.

"Well, I'd say they are torturing a prisoner," Jacob hissed back.

" _I am aware. But why?_ " Anise insisted. " _As far as we know, they had no means of communication, did they? So they could not have gained any knowledge from him by torturing him. Furthermore, Colonel O'Neill is bound tightly by his restraints, so he could not have been a danger to them. I fail to see, what the aliens could have gained from torturing him._ "

Stumped, Daniel realized she was right. What, indeed, did those aliens gain from shocking his friend repeatedly with electricity?

"I think, they are experimenting," Teal'c said unexpectedly.

"Excuse me?" Daniel asked back puzzled.

"What do you mean, Teal'c?" General Hammond inquired simultaneously.

The Jaffa inclined his head shortly, before he began explaining: "I have noticed they are varying the amount of electricity they have put O'Neill under. Sometimes it seems to be more electricity, sometimes it appears to go on longer. So I believe they are testing something. But what exactly I am unsure about."

Daniel almost gaped at his friend open-mouthed. Thank god for the Jaffa's observation skills! "Teal'c, you're a genius!" Daniel whispered.

The Jaffa didn't acknowledge the compliment in any way, but all others looked at him uncomprehending.

"I think, Teal'c's right," Daniel elaborated. "They were trying out ways. Different ways to get control over Jack! They have seen him react to pain and electricity, so they're trying to find the right amount to get him to surrender…"

Jacob snorted in the background and Daniel immediately knew what the other man was thinking. Good luck with that task. Jack would have chosen death over giving up or in. Least of all to the enemy.

"But why would they want control over Colonel O'Neill?" Kemp asked hesitantly.

"Because he has something they wanted or needed," Daniel answered immediately, once more seeing the connection. "They weren't aware of the possibilities the Stargate offers. But when they saw it to be some kind of an entrance door, they must have feared some kind of attack through the Stargate from all we know right now. After we've arrived on their planet, they must have begun to realize they weren't alone out there and they tried to prepare for that. So they probably took Sam and Jack to study them and because they thought they had something they could use. But what exactly did Jack have they could have needed?"

" _Physical strength,_ " Anise replied instantly.

Daniel gulped, but then he saw what the Tok'ra was hinting at. "She's right," he murmured, finally understanding, and he couldn't help the sarcasm that crept into his words, when he went on: "They had no means of defending themselves, so why not use the two strangers with the unrivaled strength and the knowledge of the Stargate they've stumbled upon?"

"So what? Are you telling me, they've tried to use Jack as a… guard dog…?" Jacob asked perplexed.

"For the lack of a better term? Yes," Daniel confirmed grimly.

"That is…!" Jacob began, but trailed off, obviously not finding an appropriate word to describe his affront.

"I agree," Daniel said. "But I really think those aliens merely thought us to be something akin to… Neanderthals. No brains, but brawns. All muscle, but no higher intelligent life form. I mean, they were surprised Jack and Sam could talk, in an actual language, so they probably assumed them to be some kind of animal. Hell, they tried to _train_ Jack _like an animal_ by exposing him to pain."

"That is just wrong on so many levels…" Jacob grumbled and Daniel agreed inwardly, as all the others probably did, too.

" _Well, it seems they are not really succeeding in their task, though._ " Anise commented. " _It appears Colonel O'Neill is unwilling to surrender to their techniques, no matter how much electricity they use on him_."

Yeah, that was Jack for you, Daniel thought, slightly proud. He'd seen his friend fall unconscious all the times after they had subjected him to the torture, but stubbornly, Jack had held out until they had been finished with him. He had held out, until those aliens had given up and had left, no matter what they'd put him through.

"I really hate to burst your bubble…" Doctor Kemp interjected.

Daniel watched him push the button to continue the video tape and all of a sudden, he understood that the other Doctor had already watched the video and knew what was heading for them. Daniel's stomach did a painful fall to somewhere around his knees while his head swiveled around to see what was happening. The video fast-forwarded again until Jack came awake again and the aliens returned. Daniel saw the Colonel get ready for another round of torture but for a moment nothing seemed to happen.

Then, suddenly, a high-pitched scream erupted from the screen, startling all assembled. It was such a contrast to the stubborn silence Jack had shown that Daniel needed a moment to sort through what had happened while his heart pounded away with the unexpected shock. Sam was trashing in her restraints as much as possible, her head thrown back, while she screamed. Blue energy danced over her body where Daniel saw the bands tighten over her in a try to chain her back to her stretcher, probably cutting off her air supply altogether.

Daniel's mouth went dry and gulping became painful while he watched Sam suffer through the torture. Meanwhile Jack was shouting, enraged. First for her, then at their captors. He fought against his restraints but visibly unsuccessful.

Behind Daniel, Jacob surged from his chair and began to pace through the briefing room that was filled with his daughter's screams.

Suddenly, thankfully, her yells ended and Daniel saw her sink limply into her restraints. She'd lost consciousness. Eerie silence descended in the briefing room, only interrupted by Jack's heated curses and shouts of ' _Carter!_ ' on the screen. His eyes were glued to her and although he tried to hide his fear, Daniel saw it in his eyes. And going by their captors' self-satisfied smirk they had, as well.

Daniel almost groaned. Jack had fought his captors to the best of his abilities but lastly, his foes had found his Achilles heel. They had found the right buttons to push with him. Jack would give a shit about his own safety and health, Daniel knew, but there was no way he would jeopardize Sam's wellbeing. He would do anything to protect her. And apparently having understood that, his captors had used it against him. They had used Jack's own integrity, his own need to guard his team and the desire to protect what Daniel knew to be the woman he loved against him. They had found the leash to put on Colonel O'Neill.


	11. Realizing

_Again, thank you all so much for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _So, this is part two of the explanations and we're continuing right where we left off._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Eleven – Realizing_

"Jacob, please sit down," General Hammond said understandingly.

The Tok'ra sat down next to Anise once more with a downright murderous glint in his eyes, his tense hands clutched to fists. Those aliens could thank all gods known to them that Jacob had been unaware what had happened to his daughter when they had invaded their underground structure, Daniel mused inwardly. The archaeologist had the distinct feeling that the retired General wouldn't have been so _diplomatic_ , had he known beforehand.

Daniel's gaze wandered over the table to Janet. The normally so professional Doctor looked beaten all of a sudden. The taxing days she had behind her, the constant stress and then the horrifying pictures of one of her best friends getting tortured were obviously becoming too much for her. Daniel wanted to help her somehow, to reach over the table and squeeze her hand reassuringly, but he didn't. Instead he only smiled at her to encourage her.

" _So they found a way to ensure Colonel O'Neill's… obedience,_ " Anise phrased it carefully, wary of the seething Tok'ra next to her.

"Apparently," Teal'c answered, when no one else did.

Janet sighed and raked a hand through her hair tiredly. "But why not Major Carter, too?" she asked. "I mean, she's military like the Colonel. She's also stronger than those aliens. Why not make her into a tool, too?"

Janet scrunched up her nose, as if it felt downright wrong to ask something like that, even if only hypothetically.

Instantly, all eyes went to Daniel as if he was supposed to know the answer to the question.

The archaeologist shrugged. "I'm not exactly sure. All I found in the files were the differences they noticed between Jack and Sam. Basically the differences between a male body and a female. Maybe they found her too weak, because she's a woman?"

And Daniel so hated to say that out loud, because he knew that Sam would have chewed him out thoroughly if he'd ever dared to say something like that out loud in her presence. And rightfully so. She was no weak woman. She was a strong fighter. One of the best, actually.

"Or maybe they just wanted to begin with one… test subject, and include her afterwards," Daniel contemplated. "I really can't say."

"Well, fact is those aliens began experimenting on the Colonel to have him defend them?" General Hammond asked.

All eyes went to Kemp, who had already seen the tape, and instead of answering the question in any way, the Doctor let the video continue. He fast-forwarded again, until Daniel saw the cuffs activate once again. He'd noticed they were activating in regular time intervals to feed his friends the sticky substance that would sustain them, but this time, the substance ran down another tube and looked vastly different. Kemp halted the video tape and zoomed in. A murky brown stuff disappeared in the Colonel's vein somewhere beneath the cuffs. Ew, that even looked disgusting.

"What's that?" Janet asked immediately, her eyes narrowing inquisitively.

" _It appears to be the alien concoction that caused the changes in Colonel O'Neill's body,_ " Anise commented, while looking down onto the sheet she was still holding in her hands, which was most likely the Colonel's bloodwork. " _Since apparently the nourishment he received were nutrients the human body can tolerate, this must be what caused the differences in his blood._ "

"Why? What happened to Colonel O'Neill?" General Hammond wanted to know instantly and Daniel listened attentively. Until now, they had only grazed what had happened to Sam's health, so he was very interested to know.

" _From my basic understanding of the Tau'ri human's nature, I would say his body chemistry has been altered,_ " Anise answered, shooting uncertain glances towards Janet. " _His hormone levels and his protein parameters are beyond anything I have ever seen before._ "

"Doctor Fraiser, what does that mean?" General Hammond inquired.

Janet sighed again. "I'm sorry, sir," she apologized. "I can only guess."

"Then guess."

The CMO looked down onto Jack's medical file, studying his test results. "Well, as far as I can say, he's gotten fed… with hormones."

"Hormones?" Daniel echoed surprised.

Janet nodded. "The substance he's gotten appears to be a cocktail of different, artificial hormones, mostly adrenaline and testosterone."

"I don't understand," Daniel admitted. "What would that bring?"

" _It would build up the natural strength of Colonel O'Neill_ ," Anise answered confidently. " _It would cause massive muscle growth and favor aggressive behavior._ "

Daniel raised an eyebrow at the Tok'ra woman. "That are not the only things testosterone and adrenaline are influencing," he pointed out.

" _Indeed,_ " the Tok'ra agreed. " _But I believe these were the reactions the aliens were going for._ "

"Anise is right," Janet cut in. "There were various hormones in the substance from what I can guess from Colonel O'Neill's blood tests, but most of them were to block out unintended side effects of the massive amount of adrenaline and testosterone they were giving him. It seems they were trying to make him stronger, so he would serve their aims better."

Daniel wanted to scream in frustration. Somehow it didn't feel as if he was talking about his friend here, but rather about an object, discussing its worth to see if it would justify extensive upgrades.

" _Their understanding of the way the human body works is amazing,_ " Anise commented.

Daniel knew the Tok'ra just saw it from the point of view of a scientist, but her detached way was getting on Daniel's nerves. So what if those aliens had gained some kind of knowledge about humans? They had certainly had enough time, while they had held Jack and Sam captive! And seeing what this knowledge did to his friends, Daniel was inclined to not see it as the achievement the Tok'ra scientist seemingly did.

"So… did it change the Colonel?" General Hammond asked worried, foregoing Anise's comment.

Janet nodded. "I assume so, sir," she said. "His hormone levels are still completely screwed up, even if his body managed to cut back on the massive amount considerably. I have examined his body thoroughly and there is indeed a noticeable muscle growth. I cannot say anything about his mental condition as long as he's unconscious, but physically? He is stronger than he probably was in his best years."

" _In fact, it is astonishing he managed to survive the intervention,_ " Anise continued.

"Why?" Daniel wanted to know.

It was Janet, however, who answered: "Going by the sheer amount of hormones he must have gotten to generate such test results and such changes in his body, and considering the time span in which he'd gotten it, this would have put his body through a martyrdom it couldn't have withstood. The pressure would have been too much and most likely his heart would have failed. After all, it is also a muscle that was subjected to the overly high amount of hormones and the changes coming with that."

" _It certainly explains the uncontrollable muscle spasms Colonel O'Neill has to deal with,_ " Anise threw in. " _His body had much to cope with."_

"So… how come Jack's still mostly fine?" Daniel wondered.

To this, Anise seemed to have no answer and her eyes went to Janet, as well as everyone else's. Janet's grin was positively glowing right now.

"Because he is Colonel O'Neill," she answered, now almost laughing with glee.

"I don't understand," Jacob growled for all assembled.

"I found more in Colonel O'Neill's blood than artificial hormones and proteins," Janet admitted. "First I believed it to be from the alien substance, too, because it was nothing I have ever seen before, but there were just too many differences to the alien material to make me do a double take. In fact, the new proteins I found were much closer to Colonel O'Neill's own body substances than they were to those alien materials."

"I fail to see, where this is going," Teal'c said calmly, when the rest just stared at Janet uncomprehending.

"It _was_ from Colonel O'Neill's body," Janet explained matter-of-factly. "It just wasn't there before. I think the stress, pressure and torture he had to go through activated his Ancient gene. Normally, the gene lies dormant, which was why he had such difficulties with the downloaded knowledge from the Ancients, but now the gene is active and produces proteins."

"And this means?" Jacob asked, clearly intrigued.

"Well, the most prominent and only change I could detect until now," Janet began. "…is that Colonel O'Neill now seems to possess healing abilities."

Daniel gaped at her. Really? Healing abilities? That was… unexpected to say the least. A sensation would probably be more fitting.

"Healing abilities?" General Hammond inquired baffled.

Janet nodded. "It's the only explanation I have, sir, why he has managed to survive this torture on this apparent lack of nourishment during his imprisonment. It's also the only explanation why Major Carter is still alive despite her high fever and devastating condition she was in."

"He has healed her, while he brought her back…!" Daniel whispered awed. "Just like he's healed her when she had that heart attack!"

Janet nodded. "My thoughts exactly."

General Hammond frowned skeptically and then turned towards Anise. "Did the Ancients have healing abilities?"

Anise contemplated her answer for a moment. " _Unfortunately, I cannot answer that, General,_ " she said. " _We have only limited knowledge of the Ancient culture, but until now we have never found an Ancient device used for medical treatment of any sort, so it would certainly make sense for them to have had the ability to heal themselves._ "

"Well, maybe Jack can shed some light on what's been happening, when he wakes up," Jacob said. "What about Sam, though? What did they do to her?"

Again they all looked towards the video screen and Kemp shifted the picture's focus a bit so they could see what Sam was going through. Instead of the murky brown substance the Colonel had received, a thick pink substance was flowing into her cuffs. Daniel could make nothing out of the alien material, when suddenly the clattering of a chair drew his attention away from the monitor in the front. Anise had jumped up, her eyes widened shocked.

"Anise?" General Hammond asked surprised.

The Tok'ra studied the picture on the monitor thoroughly, before she sat down slowly. Her mouth was set into a grim line, her expression dark.

" _That…!_ " she said, pointing accusingly to the pink fluid. "That _is Te'rash._ "

Daniel raised a brow questioningly. What was that supposed to be? He had never heard of it. He glanced at Teal'c, but the Jaffa looked as unknowing as he himself. Only Jacob seemed to react to the declaration.

"Te'rash!" he echoed surprised. "Are you sure?"

" _Definitely,_ " Anise declared confidently. " _I have tried to study this substance before, but it is very rare and generally not given freely… for studies._ "

"What is it?" General Hammond wanted to know.

Anise sighed, her expression turning sympathetic. " _It is a drug,_ " she admitted. " _A very rare, but destructive drug. It is highly addictive._ "

Janet's eyes narrowed displeased. "How does it work?" she wanted to know.

Anise pursed her lips. " _As far as I know, it attacks certain brain areas. It overstimulates those areas making the user feel 'high' with happiness, but on long term it destroys them and the drug functions as a replacement, so that the user wouldn't be able to live without it anymore._ "

Anise paused for a moment, before continuing: " _But that is, how the drug affects_ normal _humans._ "

"Meaning?" Janet inquired immediately.

Anise seemed to contemplate what to say. " _Major Carter is no normal human,_ " she finally stated. " _So I cannot say how it would affect her._ "

"What Anise is trying to phrase so carefully," Jacob cut in. "…is the fact that my daughter has been blended with a Tok'ra before and the drug is lethal for Goa'uld symbiotes. It is poisonous for the symbiotes and usually kills the Goa'uld and consequently the host. However, Sam isn't blended anymore, but she still has remnants of this time in her body."

Janet nodded understandingly. "That would certainly explain the high fever and the amount of white blood cells. Her body was trying to fight a poison."

"Does that mean Sam could still die?" Daniel asked, shocked.

Jacob looked at Janet sharply. "You said she was getting better, right?"

Janet nodded. "Yes, her vitals are stabilizing."

"So she is human enough for the drug to only work as a drug?" Daniel asked further. Again the question itself felt wrong to the linguist. "Or did Jack's healing get her through it?"

Janet shrugged. "Both's possible, I can't really say. Your guess is as good as mine."

"The only thing that counts is that Sammie's gonna be fine," Jacob grumbled. "She _will_ be fine, won't she?"

Janet mulled it over in her head. "I'm going to be honest," she said. "I don't know. If Anise is right and this is indeed a dangerous drug, then she might suffer through withdrawal, when she wakes up."

Daniel took a moment to let the information sink in. A drug. They had put Sam under heavy drugs. But why? What did those aliens really gain from that? For a while, Daniel was at a loss for an answer. It really didn't seem to fit to put a human the aliens intended to… use under destructive and possibly lethal drugs. Unless…

Daniel knew he was right the moment the thought shot into his head. They hadn't intended to use Sam. At least not in the way they had planned for Jack. Sam had simply been intended to function as the leash for Jack. They would have used her to ensure Jack's obedience and his loyalty. She would have been their insurance that he wouldn't turn against them with his new strength they'd given him. Because they would have made Sam dependent. Her addiction to the drug would have ensured she would have had to stay with them, would have made her dependent on her captors. And with her being bound to them, Jack's will to stay, obediently, would have been guaranteed as well.

Daniel hated that thought. In fact it sickened him, grossing him out to the point of nausea. Daniel didn't know how much the others knew or guessed, but he decided to keep this revelation to himself. The atmosphere was strained enough already and Daniel wasn't sure if he wanted this knowledge to get public.

"Is there anything we can do for Major Carter?" General Hammond asked, unaware of the archaeologist's musings. "Or Colonel O'Neill?"

"Right now?" Janet replied. "I can only treat them the way I have, already. But mostly, their own bodies need to even out the imbalance in their body chemistry. Their physical wounds have healed, they just need to regain their balance. This might take some time, though, and–"

Janet cut herself off surprised, when a SF stormed up the stairs to the briefing room, coming to stand next to Jacob's seat at the briefing table. The man saluted towards General Hammond and the General raised an eyebrow inquisitively, not quite happy about the disruption.

"What is it?" he inquired. "I thought I said to only interrupt in emergencies?"

"Sorry sir, but I thought you might want to know this," the man began, before his eyes travelled towards Doctor Fraiser. "Colonel O'Neill is awake."

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Jack blinked repeatedly. This time returning to consciousness felt difficult, to say the least. He felt like having to fight every step, as if wading through wet cement. He was aware on some level that he had been unconscious, even if memory was evading him how that had happened. But this certain feeling of mushy disorientation was familiar enough for him to recognize that he was coming back from an undefined time of unconsciousness.

Jack felt like his senses were somehow dulled. He felt that he was lying down on something soft, but he had no idea, where exactly he was. He could hear several sounds he knew he was used to, but he failed to place them. He knew on some intuitive level that there had been something he had been worrying about, but he was unsure, what that had actually been. There were just random feelings left that were echoing through him: worry, fear, anger – and overall, confusion.

When Jack finally managed to open his eyes, he stared up into familiar faces he thankfully recognized immediately: Daniel and Janet. The Napoleonic power monger had one of his wrists in her hand and obviously checked his pulse, all professional and calm. Daniel on the other hand looked as if Christmas and his birthday had just happened on the same day: eyes watery, grin overly wide and attitude all sparkly. Jack decided he got a headache just looking at the other man.

"Jack!" Daniel whispered, sounding almost breathless.

"Space-monkey," Jack croaked, before he had to clear his throat. His voice sounded as if he hadn't used it in weeks!

Janet looked up from her task and Jack felt his arm get placed back on what he assumed to be a bed underneath him. "Colonel," she acknowledged him with one of her rare, big smiles. "It's good to have you back."

"Good to be back," Jack answered, before he tried to sit up. He didn't like lying down and having to look up to his friends, when he was used to usually tower over them curtesy to his height. It took a considerable effort to even lift his upper body up, he noticed. Somehow, his whole body felt wrong. All heavy and lanky. He could actually feel his muscles tremble under the seemingly impossible task of sitting up. His upper arms were shaking from holding up his weight and his legs failed to push him up to a sitting position. What the hell was wrong with him?

Suddenly, a strong hand reached out from behind him and supported his weight, helping him to sit up, while Daniel adjusted the bed, so he could lean back comfortably. Jack looked around and saw Teal'c stand at his bed's side, the large Jaffa wearing an uncharacteristically relieved smile on his face.

"O'Neill," the Jaffa merely said, when Jack all but fell unceremoniously back into the hospital bed he was lying in.

"T, buddy," he said. With disdain, Jack noticed the way his voice trembled under the strain it had taken him to merely sit up!

And as if she was clearly aware, too, Janet addressed him, saying: "Slow down, Colonel. Your body's been through a lot and it might take some time for you to recover completely."

Been through? What had he been through to feel this off? Obviously he did need to recover from something and if his weak body wasn't indication enough than the hospital bed he was confined to would be a dead give-away.

And then suddenly the memory rushed back in. Their mission to P3-yeahsomethinglikethat, the feeling of being watched, the ambush, Carter injured, their imprisonment, the strange aliens, Carter falling ill, him under drugs, the chaotic and quite lucky escape, the travel back through the Stargate – and then, nothing.

Jack jerked up. "Carter!" he pressed out urgent. What had happened to her? Was she alright? Did they make it? Well, obviously, he had somehow made it back to the SGC, but what about her?

Daniel nodded to the side and Jack's head shot around, before he realized that he had commanded it to do so. Next to his hospital bed in what Jack finally recognized to be one of the SGC's isolation rooms was another bed placed. Jacob Carter was sitting on its edge, next to a bunch of medical equipment like a heart monitor and a respirator. They were identical to those standing next to his bed, but in contrast, he wasn't hooked up to the machines anymore, probably had been relieved of them the moment he had come to. But the person occupying the other bed was still all attached to the multitude of machines. Jack craned his head to look around Jacob. Behind the older man, who was nodding at him in an obviously relieved way, Jack could make out Sam. She appeared to be still unconscious and while she was still looking all white and sick, she appeared healthier than the last time he consciously remembered seeing her. It also helped to reassure him that the heart monitor she was connected to reported a regular, steady heartbeat.

"She's still unconscious, but she is getting better," Daniel told him, confirming his assumptions, and Jack felt a heavy weight leave his chest at that explanation. They had truly made it! They had lastly gotten out of their captor's hands and had returned to the SGC, alive…!

Jack looked back to his friends and by pure chance, locked gazes with Daniel.

"You've made it," his friend voiced his exact thoughts. Sighing, the Colonel felt even more of the pressure that had taken residence up somewhere in his chest ages ago seep out of his body.

Relieved, Jack leaned back in his bed and felt himself relax for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

* * *

 _A/N: So, do a few of you find yourselves and your assumptions confirmed now…?_


	12. Recovering

_**Author's note**_ _: So, a little delay in posting, sorry about that. Real life's been busy. Still, thank you all for sticking with me and, of course, reviewing. It's really great to read your thoughts on my work!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twelve – Recovering_

"I know you're awake, Carter!" Jack said threateningly without detaching his eyes from the treadmill in front of him. Staying upright while trying to walk required his whole concentration, so he couldn't really shoot her a withering glance, even if he wanted.

Jack's hands were clutching the treadmill, while he tried to coordinate his body's movements. Damn, that had never been so hard before!

"Good morning, sir," she greeted from behind him where he knew her bed stood, all polite and proper. "You're at it awfully early."

He snorted. What did she expect? Those aliens meddling with his body had really succeeded in screwing him up! Janet had explained to him what this substance he'd gotten fed had done to his muscles and consequently his body. Apparently, Jack's muscles had extended beyond anything he could have gained through extensive workout, giving his body an almost inhuman strength, but it had been too much, too fast. It had almost cost him his life, because his muscles – his heart being one of it; and an important one to boot – had been pushed beyond their natural limits. Only the fact that his Ancient gene had activated and had given him healing powers (how cool was that, really?) had saved his life.

In fact, Jack had done a remarkably good job at healing himself, from what Janet had determined. When Jack had been stable enough to undergo the 'examination marathon' as he'd named it afterwards, Janet had done X-rays of his whole body (amongst many other things), only to declare in a fit of rage that she could now throw away his whole medical file. Apparently, his body had healed itself thoroughly. The shoulder injury he'd gotten in Iraq? Disappeared. His smashed knees? As good as new. Various torture wounds he'd collected throughout the years? Healed beyond visibility. The broken ribs from Antarctica? Never happened. The uncountable broken bones he'd had over the years? Unidentifiable anymore. No wonder he had been unconscious for about a week, Jack had thought then. It was a small miracle what his body had achieved, even more so considering the state he had been in in the first place. But now, it was as if none of his various injuries had ever happened. Jack was healthy; in fact healthier than he'd ever been.

Physically, Jack felt good, surprisingly good even. Even better than he had felt in his thirties, when he'd been on top of his physical abilities. Actually he'd _never_ felt better or stronger. The only real problem was that his body wasn't used to this new strength yet. The muscle he'd gained was weighing considerable and he wasn't used to… using it. Routinely, his body calculated his movements the way it had always done it – and then was surprised it felt quite a bit difficult to operate when every limb felt heavier than expected. Or his head tried to operate his body with logic, trying to anticipate the unfamiliar weight – and overdid it.

Either way, Jack was nowadays walking like Bambi, fell flat on his nose or his ass all three steps, cracked almost everything he put his fingers around and had actually ruined his first hospital bed, when he'd jumped up on it, for a moment forgetting about his new body strength and weight. To his luck however, Carter had then still been unconscious, so he only had to endure the amused gazes from Daniel, which was more than enough, thank you very much. So basically, Jack now found himself confronted with the task that he actually had to relearn every body movement. And walking was his first project. Because if he would need Daniel's help to even reach the toilet any longer, he was going to scream – and he was not even thinking of what it would mean if he wanted to take a shower! Given, the archaeologist didn't complain at all and he tried to give Jack as much privacy as possible, but Jack just wasn't the type to accept help, even if he desperately needed it.

To help Jack, Teal'c had brought a treadmill to their isolation room so he could practice, much to Carter's amusement. But then again, Jack was so glad she was alright that he mostly chose to ignore the fun she was having at his cost. She had woken up two days after him, but she had been thoroughly beaten from her experiences. While he had felt considerably good and strong, she had visibly fought to even stay conscious. She had fallen asleep almost every hour, had had trouble speaking from the drowsiness that had had a tough hold on her, and Jacob had effectively camped out two whole days in their isolation room to watch over her and help her eat, drink and get to the bathroom (Daniel really had enough to do with Jack already).

Later on, when Sam had stabilized enough to follow conversations, Daniel, Janet and – much to Jack's chagrin – Anise had explained to them what had happened. It had been much to take in and it had taken Jack and Sam a few days to work through it. At first, they hadn't really talked about it at all. Both of them had needed time on their own to work through what had happened and how they felt about it, when the memories had returned fully and finally began to make sense thanks to the explanations. It didn't really help the matter of talking when Sam fell asleep every other hour due to her exhaustion either. So they had only begun to speak about their experiences, when Jack had asked her on the second day after the explanations how she was doing. Since their conversation with Daniel, Janet and Anise they hadn't received a single visitor, aside from a few nurses and their personal aides when they needed the help, and Jack silently thought it to be Janet's handiwork, because nothing other than a Doctor's order would keep Daniel or Jacob from visiting them or staying with them, as far as Jack was concerned. However, he appreciated the distance they were giving them. They did need to get a few things in order and Jack was aware that they probably would never have, if Space-monkey kept popping up at their room with his unrivaled timing.

Jack was all aware that they had merely scratched on the surface and hadn't really talked about anything running deeper than how they were doing, but for him, it was enough. Carter was still exhausted, but as long as she was mostly fine, he was fine, too. All he really cared about was that he had brought her back and that she had made it through, hopefully without any lasting effects from their capture.

The capture…

Jack still felt rage boil somewhere deep within his body at the mere thought of it, but finally he was able to handle it, somehow. The sheer thought that those slimy weasels of aliens had wanted to use him as a guard dog and Carter as his leash was enough to make him see red, but he knew there was no possibility of any revenge, so he had nowhere to go with this rage and tried his best to suppress it. Daniel had told him that the planet they'd been held on was off the roster of operational planets and couldn't be dialed directly anymore as a security measure. The archaeologist had even seemed a little bit disappointed, Jack had noticed, when he had stated wistfully that he hadn't even gotten to name the alien civilization, but as far as Jack was concerned this was a decision he could only congratulate the SGC to. He certainly wouldn't cry a single tear over never crossing these aliens again…

Daniel had also told Jack that it had been something of a miracle they had been able to return to the SGC and Jack hadn't even needed to ask, why, because he, as the base's 2IC, naturally knew all the SOP's and thus had been aware what had been done while he and Carter had been MIA. So he knew that the fact that they had been able to return, alive, was pure luck, almost a fluke of fate. And Kinsey would probably be inconsolable when he would learn of this fact, Jack was sure.

However, all the luck they'd had did nothing to ease up on the anger within Jack. Carter, for her part, had claimed that, scientifically speaking, she could understand the alien's predicament and the logic behind their behavior. Jack could not. He hated those aliens for what they'd put them through. And he hated what they had done to Carter. It might help her cope to not burden herself with any hatred, but Jack had enough energy left over to loath those aliens for the both of them.

Still, every time the anger and hatred threatened to bubble up to the surface, Jack was reminded of the fact that he had nowhere to go with it. He wouldn't ever go back to this planet or see this race again. So he tried to shift the spare energy to the task of recovering. The anger helped him to set free enough energy to work on his new body. It helped him work with his tired, aching limbs when he wanted nothing more than to crawl back to his bed and fall under the cushions to sleep for a week or so. And while Carter was still forbidden to leave her bed and the surveillance equipment she was still hooked up to, he had the permission and the steely will to train. Because Jack badly wanted out of that isolation room! It somehow helped that he wasn't in the infirmary and that Carter was with him, but he hated all that fuss the nurses and doctors were making over him. And he desperately needed his freedom back. The freedom to decide, where we went; the freedom to do what he wanted when he wanted and the freedom to choose; to choose over his own life. Jack didn't have Carter's unending patience and unlike her, he wasn't feeling that bad so that he didn't care about what was happening around him. He had enough of being confined to one room and so he used every opportunity his body let him to train, so that the moment he was allowed to, he could walk out of that door at the other end of their room. Unfortunately, for now it proved very difficult to even reach the treadmill. The few feet from his bed to the waiting machine were a challenge, but at least one he managed better and better.

"Sir?" she asked, when he had failed to answer her. "Is there a specific reason you're already wearing yourself down so early…?"

"'M not," he responded concentrated. "Just wanna use the time we have."

Especially the time left unwatched, he added silently in his head. The time before Daniel, Teal'c or whoever would come to visit them, and the time before she woke up from her coma-like sleep and he would hear her chuckles at his stumbling around. Yeah, that had not really worked out today, had it?

"Of course, sir," she said with a smug voice and he pictured her smiling widely. She sounded halfway relaxed and her tone was light, bordering on joking. Jack couldn't really look, because he feared that if he would turn around to look over his shoulder, he would disturb the precarious balance he'd just regained and probably stumble, but she sounded healthier.

He was relieved. He really liked that she was getting better day by day and he was the first one to see. Jack knew that Carter was still way behind him in the recovery department and her state was still far from healthy, but at least she _was_ getting better. After all, she didn't have his healing abilities and her body was still fighting the last effects of the poison. Most of the time, when she was awake, she was fine, but she was awake only short times. She was getting exhausted fast and when a withdrawal attack hit her, Jack could watch her energy fail her fast. Then her limbs would tremble uncontrolled, she would get raging headaches and she would become unsteady, until exhaustion would do her in and she would fall asleep once again. Jack hated seeing Carter so weak and he hated seeing the drained state she was in. Every time another withdrawal attack would hit her, he consciously had to tell himself she was _indeed_ getting better. He just couldn't stop worrying about her, even though he knew she didn't want or need it. The Napoleonic power monger had assured him Carter would get through it eventually, going by her rate of recovery, and that she just needed time. She just wasn't as far as he had come already. Still, Jack couldn't help but worry, even though he did his best to mask his concern. She had enough problems already without having to add his rampant imagination to it.

The hairs at his neck bristled and Jack almost rolled his eyes exasperated. Really, he could understand that there was nothing else in the room to entertain her, but did she have to watch him? It wasn't really helping his fragile balance and his ego didn't need another experience, where she laughed at him, because he'd fallen spectacularly on his nose in front of her.

"Carter, I can _feel_ you watching," he growled intimidatingly.

"Do you, sir?" she answered, still amused. She was having way too much fun at his expense, he decided.

He turned off the treadmill, deciding that he had enough exercise for the time being. He waited for a moment so that his legs could adjust to the standing, when all they'd done the past half hour was walking, and then turned towards her, leaving his hands on the machine for stabilization.

She smiled at him, one of her big, honest smiles. It almost did him in immediately. His heart clenched painfully at seeing her open, unreserved expression. When had he last seen it, at least pointed at him? Probably sometime before the Za'tarc testing, he mused inwardly. Again he was reminded of how much they had grown apart in the time between then and now, and he was distinctly reminded of how often he'd thought about this time during his imprisonment. Then, he'd sworn himself to change something, if he would still get the chance. Now he had it. They were free, were both on their way to recover. But could he still do it? The situation hadn't changed in any way, just because they had been captured off-world. They were different, but the situation was still the same. Was it really right to get closer to her again, just to satisfy his own, selfish needs? Was it fair to her? Was that even what she would want? Jack had no idea. And suddenly, he wished they had talked more about their recent experiences. How was she coping? Was she blaming him? Because, after all, it had been his command that had singled her out only to end up captured alongside him. It could have easily struck Daniel in her stead, if Jack had chosen differently…

Jack's eyes narrowed and he broke the eye contact. Cautiously, he began to make his way back to his bed. He could feel that she was following him with her eyes.

He managed to reach the hospital bed without further embarrassing himself and let himself fall down on the covers. He turned his head and looked at her. She was gnawing on her lower lip as if she had felt the sudden shift in the mood and was confused about it. And Jack suddenly realized he was feeling guilty. Guilty that he had dragged her into it and that she had suffered because of him. Actually still suffered because of him. Because of their chain of command and a decision he'd made and she had been unable to refuse, she had been hauled into it.

"Sir…?" she questioned carefully, her eyes searching his face for any sign what could have brought on the sudden shift in atmosphere.

God, right now, he _hated_ that she called him that! He knew, why she did it; knew it was the _proper_ way, the way it would be demanded of her, but right now, he would have given everything to hear her call him by his name, all the while knowing exactly that it was wrong on so many levels. And he hated himself for wanting it nonetheless. Wasn't that just the root of the problem? He wanted things from her she couldn't give him; maybe didn't even want to give him.

And this was why they had mutually decided to stay coworkers and nothing more. They had been balancing at that fragile border of their relationship before, had gotten way too close before – and where had that gotten them? First almost all of SG-1 had gotten killed on Apophis' freakin' new battle toy, because he had been making decisions based on his feelings rather than logic, and then she'd gotten singled out by the alien entity, which had almost cost her her life. Jack had thought he'd learned his lesson then. His feelings for her were dangerous and endangering her. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't suppress them. As seen by their current abduction, where Sam should have been used to control him…

Jack couldn't leave his feelings for her behind and go on, but of that he had been aware. Because he actually didn't want to go on. He didn't want to stop loving her, it just felt too right. And Jack had always been a one-woman-man. So usually, when he settled on a woman, he remained loyal to her and stopped at nothing until she was his, but with Carter this really wasn't an option, was it? So he had tried fighting it. But slowly, Jack realized that fighting his feelings wasn't really succeeding, either. And that made him wonder where that left them. What could he still do? What did he want to do?

"Sir?" she prompted him again, her voice slowly turning concerned.

He realized he was staring at her without saying anything. Slowly, methodically, Jack exhaled, trying to bring his thoughts in order. She hadn't realized it – of course, she hadn't – but one glance from her had been enough to get him thinking through their whole situation. And he suddenly understood that, without wanting to, he had managed to drive himself into a corner. There were only two possible ways left for him: he could either turn his back on her, pretend to just be colleagues and try to live with the fact that sooner or later she would move on from him to someone else, or finally act on his true feelings. And he wanted to walk down neither of those ways. Then again, he couldn't stand in his corner for all eternity and pretend to not see, what was happening. Sooner or later, there would come the day he would _have_ to choose, of that Jack was fairly sure.

But feeling unable to decide right now what would be the best way, Jack did, what he always did, when a turning point approached in his life: he went with the flow – and said nothing to it. Instead he tried to busy himself with other things so he would be distracted.

"How're you doin', Carter?" he asked suddenly.

She raised her eyebrows astonished at the sudden change of topic and for a moment she seemed to contemplate, whether she should comment it or not. Apparently, she decided against it. Jack was thankful. He couldn't do the feelings right now, not when it was all still too raw and fresh. He needed a bit distance to see it clearly.

Which was also why he hadn't asked her how she _felt_ but how she _was doing_. She seemed to notice it almost right away, though.

"Getting better, sir," she answered.

"Really?" he inquired, skeptically.

Again guilt flashed through him. Until now he hadn't really taken the time to ask after her wellbeing. Given, he had listened to Janet's and Anise's explanations, so he had a decent understanding of what she had gone through and from time to time, he had asked her, how she was holding up, but until now, he had always backed down immediately, when she had claimed to be 'fine'. He almost snorted at that. Nobody went through what they had been through and came out _fine_.

As the Officer in Charge, he had been responsible for her. Jack should have looked out for her and he felt as if he had failed her. Nobody seemed to be of this opinion or blame him, but still the thought nagged and disturbed him.

"Yes, sir," she said, smiling at him reassuringly. Did she somehow know, what he was thinking of? "Janet says I'm recovering pretty good for what I've been through."

She sounded proud of that and he couldn't help the automatic grin that crept onto his face at that. Still, he was abruptly hit with the thought of how much of a coincidence it really was that they were both sitting (or rather lying) here, doing Smalltalk. If it hadn't been for the mere fluke that he carried the Ancient gene, neither of them would have survived. Janet was sure that while Jack had carried Sam to the Stargate his healing powers had cured her due to the close contact with him she'd gotten into. Somehow, without knowing how, his powers had healed her before she'd lost the battle against the high amount of poison she had been subjected to, and his healing had even managed to tone down the withdrawal symptoms she still had to go through a little bit. But if he weren't an Ancient descendant? Neither of them would have survived.

"Is that so?" he said lamely, just so he had given her an answer. With the knots his thoughts had tangled into, he was slightly losing track of their conversation.

She nodded. "I do get headaches from time to time, but Janet says if those will be the only withdrawal symptoms my body will go through she'll let me go as soon as my health has improved."

"That's good to hear," he answered, all the while knowing she was playing it down in his favor. He'd seen what she had to go through and what the withdrawal was actually doing to her, body as well as mind, but he could also understand that she wanted to focus on the good parts for once. Just as he, she must be fed up with feeling weak.

Somehow, Jack couldn't wait for the situation to change. Yes, he wanted Carter to get better and to see her recover step by step was doing a lot for his own mental state, but he needed a bit space. They'd been kept in the same room for weeks and it was doing its toll on him. As physically fine as Jack felt and was, he just realized, emotionally he was not. And the only one he could blame for that was himself. Because he was the one who'd essentially gotten them into this situation in the first place.

"So… how are you, sir?" Carter asked, sounding generally interested.

Jack leaned back into his pillow, closing his eyes. He felt tired and exhausted.

"Fantastic, Carter, just… fantastic."

* * *

 _A/N: So Jack's back to being Jack…_


	13. Worrying

_As usual, thanks to all, who read, follow and, especially, review!_

 _Little random rambling_ _: So, the winners for this year's SJMAs are out! And while I had the luck to be nominated for the category 'author', I haven't actually won. But seeing who I was up against, I'm not really surprised. Still, thank you very much to the people who nominated me and voted for me! And congratulations to all winners, they really deserve it._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirteen – Worrying_

It took another week however before Janet finally released them. By then Jack had been about to climb the walls in frustration and only the fact that he could pour his whole irritation into his training kept him from going insane. Carter on her part had slept through most of the time, her body in dire need of the rest. By the end of the week, she had finally stabilized enough for Janet to give her the okay to leave and by then Jack had been a bundle of nervous energy Janet obviously had no patience anymore for to tolerate. Seeing that they had both gotten as well as possible in the short time, Janet had deemed them healthy enough to release them from their isolation room but they were both still confined to the base and their private quarters here. For Jack, that was enough. He could finally decide over his life and body again and he could finally avoid Carter for a while. That was all he wanted for now.

Carter was still suffering from unpredictable headaches but that was the only side-effect she still had and Janet had gotten her on painkillers and they both hoped for the withdrawal to vanish soon. Jack, on his part, had finally managed to get his body under control again. Mostly, anyways. He could walk, run and jump as good as before, maybe even better. The moment he had been freed from the isolation room, he had taken up training with Teal'c to get his combat skills back and had consequently discovered that with his new strength he was much closer to the Jaffa's strength than before. Jack would never be a match for the former Prime, who'd trained under Bra'tac, but he would be a close match for a normal Jaffa and wasn't that an ego boost!

Well, he _would_ be, sometime admittedly, but it was a goal worth working for. Right now, Jack's body was still too slow and clumsy to be considered a serious threat to anyone and the fact that he still had to use most of his concentration to coordinate his movements ensured that he normally had to take a good beating from Teal'c during their training sessions, followed by a miserable night in his quarters in which he would be trying to convince himself that he was not in that much pain that he would need to go to Janet and ask her for painkillers, because he seriously feared she would chain him back to his hospital bed if she got the impression he was overdoing it, which he clearly was…

But soon after Jack and Sam had been freed from their isolation room, routine all claimed them back. Sam began burying herself in her lab again, trying to get a reign over the backload of projects that had accumulated while she'd been MIA. Daniel stayed with her most of the time, claiming to help her, but Jack suspected the younger man wanted to keep a close eye on their astrophysicist friend seeing that Jack failed spectacularly to do it himself. In fact, the moment Janet had released them, Jack had taken off and since then had done his best to shun all others. Jack knew Jacob had stayed a few days with Carter to see if she really was stable, but then he had had to leave due to an urgent mission he couldn't delay further. Anise had already returned days before. Jack was unsure when exactly, because he had done his best to avoid the Tok'ra at all costs. He had enough to do with the mess his feelings were already without adding the rather aggressive Tok'ra scientist, thank you very much, and so Jack had hid behind the fact that he was still considered recovering and the assumption that Daniel would surely have told the Tok'ra, how inconsolable he was and stuff like that, even if they all knew he was not. Whatever, Jack couldn't care less, right now. Life was complicated enough at the moment.

And so, while Carter returned to her normal life under Daniel's watchful eye, Jack buried himself under the amount of paperwork that had gathered in his office. Partly to avoid the attentive eyes of Teal'c and General Hammond and partly, because he really needed to get the work done. He was still this base's 2IC, so he needed to be informed. He had to read through all the mission reports on what had happened during his absence and he spent a lot of evenings holed up with General Hammond in his office to go through all the recent events. But for once, Jack did not mind the lot of paperwork, because it certainly got his thoughts off Carter. He basically did the same she always did: he buried himself in work, pretending nothing had happened, knowing all the while that it couldn't go on like this forever.

Still he continued on all the same.

After another tiring evening holed up in his office, Jack decided that he needed to see at least four other, different walls. He was still confined to the base after he'd broken a few things accidently and thus was deemed to be a too great danger for the real, outside world, but he knew that Carter was by now allowed to go home as long as she took her medicine. Though Jack hadn't checked if she had really gone home, because as much as he tried to bring some distance back between them, the thought that she was still close by and safe within the mountain was doing a lot for his mental stability.

So deciding that his office was neither nice nor interesting enough to be spending another night in it, Jack took a handful of folders and decided to continue this in his private quarters. At least there he had a TV to drown out the unnerving silence. Jack stood up and leaving his office, he headed towards the elevator. Absentmindedly, he stepped in and while the elevator brought him to Level 25, he began flipping through one of the folders. He sighed, when he saw the bunch of documents within it. Already, he was getting bored with the paperwork. He wanted to go back on missions!

The elevator's doors opened and without looking up, Jack let his legs carry him to his quarters. On autopilot, he swiped his keycard through the slot and heard the doors open for him almost silently. But before he could enter, he was almost bowled over by a frantic figure coming from another one of the senior staff's private quarters. Jack stumbled, as well as the other man, and his folders fell, spilling their contents all over the floor of his quarters.

The Colonel shot around, levelling his annoyed eyes on the intrusion only to find Daniel sitting on the floor behind him.

"Ever heard of 'no running in the corridors', Space-monkey?" Jack inquired, while he extended a hand and pulled the other man to his feet.

"Sorry Jack, I was in a hurry," the archaeologist said rushed, looking ready to bolt once more.

Jack raised a brow, his interest triggered by the unusual behavior. "Something wrong?" he asked.

Jack had to admit it had been a few days since he had seen the archaeologist. Since Daniel tended to hang around Carter nowadays and Jack was quite insecure around her at the moment and thus preferred to avoid situations that got him in too close proximity to her, he hadn't sought out his friend like he'd normally do.

Daniel gnawed on his lower lip nervously. "They're bringing Cassie in," he informed Jack. "I was just on my way to get you, but I thought, you'd still be in your office…"

Jack felt his blood going cold all of a sudden. "Cassie?" he asked, all awake and fired up in a second. "What's wrong with her?"

Daniel shrugged unknowing. "I don't know," Daniel admitted. "Apparently Janet called in to get her transported here when she collapsed at home."

"Why? What happened?" Jack asked while he motioned towards the elevator, shutting his room's door with a hand without looking and forgetting about the spilled documents in his quarters in an instant.

Together both men stomped towards the elevator. Daniel shook his head unknowing, while walking. "I don't know more. I haven't spoken to her."

"Shit!" Jack cursed. "I talked to Cassie on the phone just a few hours ago and she sounded fine!"

"Really?" Daniel asked. "You talked to her?"

"Of course I did, Daniel, it's her birthday today! Don't tell me, you forgot?"

Daniel pursed his lips in pretend hurt, while they halted in front of the elevator, Jack all but punching the call-button.

"I did not forget her birthday!" the linguist emphasized. "I gave Sam a card for her."

"Carter?" Jack immediately perked up at the mention of his 2IC's name.

Daniel nodded. "Janet and Sam wanted to throw a small party for Cassie. I'm surprised you're not there."

Jack deliberately forgot to mention the fact that you couldn't be invited to a party if you avoided talking to the hosts. Still, even if he _had_ been invited, he couldn't have gone, given that the Napoleonic power monger – who also happened to be Cassie's mother – had confined him to the base. Who again had put that woman in charge of, well, everything…?

"Cassie said something about having a date and that she wouldn't be there, even if I would come…" Jack murmured, feeling that that excuse sounded more than lame.

"Oh, I see," Daniel said nevertheless.

The elevator came and both men stepped in. In silence they rode up to Level 21, where the infirmary was placed. The relative quiet they were greeted with told them that Janet and her daughter hadn't arrived until now. So they settled in a corner to wait.

However, Daniel being Daniel, he couldn't stay still for long. "Jack?" he asked humbly.

"Mhm?" the other man asked back.

Daniel turned towards him, his honest eyes boring into Jack. "How're you doing?"

Jack raised his eyebrows, actually surprised that Daniel was only asking now. Normally, he would have expected the archaeologist to be at his throat days ago. Had Space-monkey actually given him some time to come clear? But then Jack realized he hadn't really talked with his friend, either. He had withdrawn and shut his friends out, once again. It was his way to cope, he knew, but over the years he had learned that not only needed he a way to handle things, but his team did, too. Often Jack wasn't the only one affected and while he did well with ignoring everything, Daniel was a different type. The archaeologist actually needed to talk to work through the events and Jack always had to go through this with him at some point. Teal'c and Jack, they understood each other, and neither of them was a man of many words. They were both warriors and coped much in the same way: by accepting and going on. Carter and he, they had an unusual understanding of each other, which allowed them to work through things together without really having to talk. But Daniel was actually the only one Jack would ever talk to about anything. On one hand, because the archaeologist needed it and on the other hand, because he wouldn't leave Jack alone like anyone else would. Daniel had always been persistent and Jack knew that this trait of his friend had gotten through to him on more than one occasion. And when it did, it normally pulled him out of whatever down spiral he'd gotten in, then, whether Jack actually wanted it or not.

"I'm fine," Jack said, for once not even thinking of fighting the archaeologist on this. He'd seen it coming already and from experience he knew that, with such things, you couldn't get rid of Daniel, no matter what you did. When he had set his eyes on some goal, he achieved it. Because he never gave up before he'd attained what he wanted. It was as simple as that.

"Really?" Daniel inquired softly.

Jack chuckled, against his will. "Really, Daniel," he assured the other man. "I've been through imprisonment before, so it's not like this was anything new."

Daniel scrunched up his face, obviously not liking this thought much. "But this wasn't really like all those times before, was it?" he fathomed.

Jack almost sighed. How come the man had the talent to hit closer to home than Jack liked to admit to even himself?

"What gave you that impression?" he evaded, before another thought grabbed hold of him. "Did Carter–?"

He didn't get to finish the sentence however. Suddenly, the doors burst open and a hospital bed was pushed in by two male nurses. Janet was sitting on it and Cassie lay on top of the covers, unmoving. Right behind the bed Sam jogged into the infirmary, her face pale and worried. Just like Janet, she was in civvies, wearing a brown knee-length skirt and a pale pink camisole over a white top, and carried her shoes in her hand so that she could run.

Jack and Daniel immediately shot up from their sitting positions but they waited until the medical personnel had placed Cassie's bed. The moment the brakes were pushed in place however, both men stood next to the bed, where Sam stood rooted already. Janet was hollering orders and suddenly, the infirmary was bustling, nurses running around to fulfill the CMO's orders.

Jack stepped back a bit when they brought a bunch of medical equipment over. Daniel and Sam copied his movements unnoticing, his 2IC coming to stand closely at his side. Jack looked down on her. Sam looked unhealthy. He didn't know if it was from the shock of seeing Cassie collapse, but she was paler than normal and her face was pulled into a strained expression, her body tense and wary. This normally strong, steady woman right now looked overtaxed and tired. And the unfamiliar picture of her in civvies only added to the impression. Jack hated that sight on her and again, he scolded himself inwardly. He should have kept a closer eye on her instead of only trusting on Daniel to do _his_ job. How come that while knowing it all better, he still made the same mistakes over and over again?

Without managing to keep himself in check, Jack reached out and hooked a finger around the hem of the excuse of a jacket Carter wore to pull her back a bit by it. She bumped lightly against his frame and from the corner of his eyes, he saw her eyebrows shoot up surprised. She tensed up for a second, but almost immediately Jack felt her body relax, sagging into the comfort he was providing.

Together with Daniel they stood silently in their corner, watching the drama unfold around Cassie. Janet was working frantically but professionally and they all waited for Cassie to respond to the treatment.

Jack placed his hand against the small of Sam's back, suddenly needing a closer connection to her. Her body heat warmed his hand and she shifted her weight almost unnoticeably, leaning just the slightest bit with her shoulders against his chest. Despite all the drama, Cassie's state and Sam's exhaustion, Jack had the most disturbing feeling that it felt right. Him standing there with Carter, offering her his support, felt right. Talk about being wrong.

Sighing, Jack glued his eyes to Cassie, watching her pale, still features. How come that it always needed a crisis to make him and Carter act normal? How come they only allowed themselves to show their true feelings while facing an emergency? He had sworn himself, he would change it after their imprisonment and again, he had reverted to old habits. But all of a sudden, Jack had enough. It was enough. Something needed to change. Burying his head in the sand and pretending to not notice a thing wasn't working any longer.

And so, while standing at Cassie's sickbed, Jack vowed that it was the last time he was running away from the thing between him and Carter.

* * *

 _A/N: Yes, I know that, technically, 'The Rite of Passage' comes before where I've placed 'Beyond Reason', which is obviously somewhere after 'Desperate Measures'. Told you I was going to tamper with the timeline, because it just wouldn't work out otherwise. You'll soon see, why._


	14. Searching

_As usual, thank you all for reading, following and especially reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fourteen – Searching_

Sam entered the viewing platform of Cassie's isolation room and wasn't surprised to find Janet there. The CMO turned at hearing her approach and both women sighed simultaneously. Sam smiled at her, but she felt the strain it took her to make the smile convincing. Really, Sam contemplated idly, neither of them should look into a mirror in the near future. Neither of them was a sight to be seen right now, but neither of them cared, too. The worry for Cassie was too great to have spare thoughts for their appearances.

"How's she doing?" Sam inquired almost immediately.

Janet turned back to the observation window and together they looked towards the unmoving teen who was twirling a chess knight in the air without touching it.

"No change," Janet admitted glumly, before it nearly erupted from her: "I wish she would stop that!"

Janet motioned towards the innocently circling chess knight and Sam nodded in understanding. The powers Cassie was gaining were frightening. And Janet was clearly overtaxed with the situation. First it was Colonel O'Neill, who had miraculously developed healing powers and now Cassie was getting psychic powers. It was like being transported into a sci-fi movie…

Sam patted her friend's shoulder and quietly proposed: "How about I keep her company for some time and you go get some sleep?"

Janet shook her head. "I want to wait until Daniel returns," she said.

Sam quickly calculated. Daniel had returned to Hanka together with Teal'c and SG-3 as back-up to search for a way to cure Cassie. The Colonel had thrown a fit to be allowed to go with them, but Janet hadn't relented. He was still confined to the base until Janet had thoroughly examined his altered body and concluded that he was not posing any threat to his teammates. Now he was probably sulking somewhere, but Sam hadn't checked. Her whole attention was focused on Cassie. She loved the girl and seeing her suffer through the high fever was something Sam could relate to very well.

"That will still take some time," Sam answered Janet. "They've just departed a few hours ago. Go sleep a few hours. I'll wake you up, if there's any change."

Janet contemplated it for a moment, but then she gave in. "Thanks, Sam," she said, before leaving the observation room to take a nap, probably in the infirmary to be closer to her daughter.

Sam stepped from the observation platform and then entered the isolation room.

"Hey," she greeted the teen sitting in her hospital bed.

"Sam," Cassie acknowledged her indifferently.

Sam walked up to her and sat down at the bed's edge, watching the knight do somersaults in an unhurried pace. "Wow, I've never known chess pieces could do that," she tried to ease the atmosphere with a joke.

"They can't. That's me," Cassie answered stoically.

Sam smiled. "I know, honey."

For a moment Sam thought of trying to get Cassie to stop doing that, just as Janet had wished to, but she refrained from it.

"How do you do that?" she asked instead.

"I just… think it," Cassie answered.

Sam knew that it somehow helped Cassie to transfer the power building up in her body out onto that chess knight and that it brought the fever down, so she let her continue. After a moment, Cassie turned her head, ripping her eyes from the pirouetting knight that still continued its movement even when the teen didn't look at it.

"Sam, I need to go!" Cassie intoned strongly.

Sam smiled at her reassuringly. "I know, Cassie. Janet told me all about it, but you know why we can't let you do that, don't you?"

"But it will help me! I know it! Mom can't do anything, but the forest on my planet–" Cassie tried anew.

"Cassie, Daniel and Teal'c have gone back to Hanka," Sam informed her. "If there is anything that can cure you, they will bring it back here. You can't go anywhere in your state."

"They won't understand!" Cassie insisted frustrated. "Mom doesn't understand! _You_ don't understand!"

Sam raised a brow. "If anyone, it would be me who knows what you're going through right now," she contradicted.

Cassie glanced at her, all skeptical teenager. "How would you know?" she inquired.

"I've just been through something similar," Sam answered humbly. She had had no intention to speak with Cassie of all people about her time MIA, but if it helped the girl to understand her situation better, then Sam was willing to try it.

Cassie's eyes widened surprised. "Mom told me," she whispered. "She told me, you and Jack had gone missing. And she made me swear not to ask you about it…"

Sam chuckled. That was Janet for you.

"It's not really a story to tell," Sam agreed. "But my point is I also got a high fever, so I can understand to some extent, what you have to go through right now."

"But you didn't have the overwhelming urge to be… some specific place so you could get back to being normal, did you?" Cassie questioned.

Sam shook her head absentmindedly. She had wished to be anywhere but where she had been at that time, but Cassie was right. This was different than her situation.

"We'll find a solution, Cassie," she tried to comfort the teen.

Cassie sighed and for the moment she seemed to give up on convincing Sam.

"How about a game of chess?" Sam asked, pointing towards the board she had brought to Cassie's room when she had come to visit her the first time and that Cassie was by now rather diverting from its intended use.

"Why not?" Cassie said, once more indifferent.

They began playing, game after game, just to pass the time, while they waited for Daniel and the others to return. But while Sam actually touched her pieces, Cassie simply moved them by thought. Hours later, they finally stopped when Cassie was about to fall asleep sitting upright and Sam waited by her bedside until she was sleeping deeply, as she had done a couple of times when Cassie had been younger.

Tired, Sam stood up and stretched her limbs, working out the kinks in her aching joints she'd gotten from sitting too long in the same position. Silently, she left the room, intending to search Janet. Really, Sam was surprised the CMO had stayed away that long.

She had barely stepped out into the hallway, when the PA system broadcasted for her: " _Major Carter to the control room. Major Carter to the control room!_ "

Sam didn't waste any time. Instantly, she jogged to the elevator and rode down to Level 28. When she left the lift, she could already hear the kawoosh of an engaging wormhole, which told her several things. For her to be able to hear it, the doors to the 'Gate room had to be open and that meant it was a scheduled arrive and the identities of the travelers had been confirmed already. It also meant that whoever was coming back had been anticipated and the most urgent event, which would also compel Harriman to page her, was Daniel's departure to Hanka. Sam jogged into the control room, not really surprised to see the Colonel standing at the Chief Master Sergeant's side already. Since Harriman hadn't paged him, Sam had guessed that he'd been here all the time.

Silently, Sam came to stand by his side and copying his position, she looked down into the 'Gate room. Daniel and Teal'c had just come through the Stargate with SG-3 right behind them. Janet was waiting for them at the base of the ramp.

"How's Cassie?" Jack asked quietly next to her.

"Still the same," Sam answered, while tracking Daniel and Teal'c with her eyes, trying to read from their expressions if they had been successful.

"Colonel O'Neill. Major Carter," General Hammond's voice suddenly greeted from behind them.

They stepped apart to make room for the General, both greeting back simultaneously: "Sir."

The General quickly glanced down into the 'Gate room. "So Doctor Jackson and Teal'c are back," he concluded, sounding satisfied. "That's good."

The General reached for the intercom's mic and then they heard his voice reverberate down in the 'Gate room: " _SG-1, SG-3, Doctor Fraiser. Immediate debriefing._ "

"Yes, sir," Sam and Jack confirmed the order the moment Daniel, Teal'c and Janet down in the 'Gate room nodded in understanding.

The General and the Colonel turned immediately and walked towards the stairs leading up to the briefing room, but Sam hung back. Down in the 'Gate room, she could see Daniel, Teal'c and SG-3 walk towards the armory to bring their weapons back, while Janet bee-lined for the corridor leading to the control room. Sam could already hear the telltale sounds of the other woman's heels, while she still stared down into the empty 'Gate room. The wormhole had disengaged and the SF's stepped down routinely, but something seemed to have triggered Sam's attention. Confused, the Major let her eyes travel through the room, only to find nothing out of the ordinary. Puzzled, she tried to name what seemed so unusual to her, but she couldn't. There was nothing.

"Sam?" Janet asked from behind her, having arrived in the control room.

Sam turned and headed towards her friend, shaking off the strange feeling. She was already seeing ghosts…

Together both women began to climb the stairs, while Janet asked: "How's Cassie?"

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Daniel had found nothing.

No, that wasn't right, Sam chastised herself. He'd found out a lot, just nothing that could help Cassie. Sam stared forlornly through the window of the observation room, feeling a tight knot of fear build in her stomach. What if there was no way to help Cassie?

Sam shook her head and sternly reminded herself to remain on topic. With Teal'c's help, Daniel had determined that the lab they had apparently found belonged to Nirrti. From the way things looked right now, the Goa'uld had experimented on the people of Hanka, trying to build a superhuman host. And she'd gotten damn near it, Sam thought, while she watched Cassie sleep. Janet stood by her side, her normally patient, calm face marred by the constant frown she was nowadays carrying around.

But from what Daniel had explained in the debriefing the lab had appeared abandoned. Nirrti had killed off Hanka's whole population and had obviously not intended to return to the planet. She had probably deemed the experiments done and had taken everything worthwhile with her. Which also meant anything that could help Cassie.

Sam felt the irrational urge to scream. Or tear at her hair. Or anything. She just wanted to do something. She felt so useless! She had promised Cassie they would help her and now? They had nothing. Sam had basically broken her promise to the girl.

How many days since it had started? Sam tried to count, but she had already lost track. It had all started on Cassie's sixteenth birthday. When had that been again…?

Sighing, Sam settled into one of the plastic chairs, intent to wait for Janet to emerge, so she could speak to the Doctor. Sam leaned her chin into her palm, her elbow placed steadily on the chair's armrest and got ready to wait a while.

The next thing she noticed were voices next to her. Groggily, Sam looked up, confused for a moment. From the intensive lighting she knew immediately that it was day and concluded that she had fallen asleep sometime during the night. Her whole body ached and spontaneously, Sam decided she would never again spend a night in one of those plastic chairs. Or, if it really was inevitable, she would choose a more comfortable one.

Groaning, Sam sat up. During her sleep, she had slid down until she had been nearly lying in the chair. Her back protested when she finally freed it from the awkward position. Suddenly, Sam noticed that there was a jacket placed over her. Confused, she stared at the familiar, way-too-large garment. She knew immediately from the scent that it was the Colonel's, but how had it gotten here?

The voices around her stopped talking and then, one of them called out: "Sam!"

She looked up and recognized Daniel and the Colonel. Teal'c was also standing next to them, but remained silent. How long had they been there? Well, at least that explained how the jacket had gotten on her, Sam mused. Somewhat shakily, she got to her feet, swaying for a moment, when blood rushed back into her numb limbs. No, definitely no sleeping in chairs anymore!

"Had a good night, Carter?" the Colonel asked ironically at seeing her state.

"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir," she answered, determined to not give him the satisfaction to see her discomfort.

She laid his jacket onto the chair, unsure if Daniel and Teal'c were aware that it was Jack's, and then stepped up to the men of her team. When she stopped next to the Colonel, she became self-conscious, suddenly wishing she had slept in her bed, looked better than she probably did and had had the time to wash herself and clean her teeth. Then again, he'd seen her on worse days.

"How's Cassie?" Sam asked, looking through the observation window. Just like Sam, Janet had fallen asleep in a chair next to her daughter's bed.

"Resting," Daniel answered.

Meaning: no change, Sam thought. Her frustration grew. There had to be something they could do for Cassie! What was she not thinking of? Most of the times, solutions were something simple, something obvious! Sam's eyes narrowed determined. She hated the thought, but she would have to leave Cassie. She needed to go to her lab. She had to find something that could help her.

Sam turned and headed for the door.

"Carter?" his voice made her stop.

"I'll be in my lab, sir," she said without turning.

"Alright," he answered. He understood. Glad, she was about to step out, when he called after her: "I'll stay with her."

Relieved, Sam made her way to the elevator. She would make a quick stop at her quarters to use the bathroom and then she fully intended to bury herself in her lab and only reemerge, when she'd found something that would help Cassie!

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Late afternoon came and by now, Sam was highly frustrated. She had found nothing. But then again, her attempts had been… weak. She was so tired, she felt like falling asleep while working in her lab - and usually, it was the other way round: her work in her lab kept her up, fascinating her enough to refuse any sleep. But her nights right now were _difficult_. Sam didn't really sleep well anymore. She tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep, and when she finally managed, nightmares would hunt her nights. Frustrated and exhausted, she'd told Janet a few days ago and the CMO had advised her to try calming breathing techniques and if that didn't work, she would give her sleeping pills. But Sam didn't really want to take more medicaments. She already got enough for the headache attacks she suffered through from time to time. Just like now. Her head was pounding with a nasty ache and, for once, all her meds weren't helping. Talk about timing. _Now_ of all times she had to get a withdrawal attack! Given, they were getting better and came more and more seldom, but whenever they came, they were still as irritating as before.

Long story short, Sam couldn't concentrate for the life of her and while she tried her best, to say she worked slowly would be nice phrasing. Nevertheless, Sam went through any solution she could think of, but whatever simulation she ran, it turned out useless in Cassie's case.

Sighing, Sam rubbed her temples, when a shiver ran down her back. Again she looked up, expecting someone to stand in her open lab door, watching her, but there was no one. This was the third time already that she had imagined being watched. Either someone had played with her air conditioning – she felt too exhausted to actually stand up and check – or her tired mind was playing tricks on her. She would definitely bet on the latter.

Sam ran a hand through her messed up hair and looked at the picture displayed on her laptop. A Goa'uld healing device. They had a few here in Cheyenne Mountain and Sam kept coming back to it. It certainly had the power to make Cassie healthy again, but here at the base, Sam was the only one who could use it. And her tries hadn't really been that successful, to be honest. Her time with Jolinar had been too short and her knowledge then too scarce so that she could have picked up anything useful from the Tok'ra. She actually had no idea whatsoever, whenever she tried to use the device. So her chances of healing Cassie with it were practically nonexistent, and the risk that she was doing something wrong and cause Cassie some harm way too high.

Suddenly, Sam halted. Healing. _Of course!_

Why hadn't she thought about it before? The Colonel had healing powers now, didn't he? Maybe he could cure Cassie!

Sam jumped up and practically flew from her lab. Her brain raced, while her legs carried her towards the elevator with a fast pace. It had been so obvious!

Thankfully, the elevator was at her level and so Sam slid in immediately, pushing the button for the infirmary's level impatiently. The moment the door's opened again, Sam ran down the corridor. What had her puzzled was that, while she had failed to think of this solution, the Colonel hadn't said anything, either. Sam knew of his intelligence even though he did his best to hide it, so there was no way he hadn't already thought of this possibility. So why hadn't he suggested it? Or had he talked with Janet about it and they had both decided it didn't work, for whatever reason?

Sam braked down in front of the isolation room. Without bothering with the observation platform, she stepped into the isolation room. She threw a quick glance at the window and as expected, she made out the Colonel behind it. She had known he would stand by his word. And, as expected, Janet sat by Cassie's side, talking with her. An empty chair by the bed indicated that Jack had been in there, too, but had obviously left, so that mother and daughter could spend some time together.

"Janet?" Sam interrupted urgently.

The CMO looked up and then, without questioning Sam, she stood up and came over, bringing a little distance between them and Cassie's bed.

"Please tell me, you've found something!" Janet whispered keenly. "The Colonel said you would try to work on a solution?"

"I tried, but the best I could come up with… was the Colonel himself," Sam murmured back.

Janet raised an eyebrow curiously. The fact that she didn't pick up immediately on Sam's thoughts was testament to her own exhaustion.

"He has healing powers now!" Sam explained rushed.

Janet looked at her blankly. "Right," she agreed, obviously baffled. Then her head swirled around and going by the suddenly icy air that came from her friend, Sam guessed that she was sizing up the Colonel behind the observation window with a withering glance. And then Janet stormed from the room. Sam hurried after her immediately.

"Janet, you didn't let me–!" Sam began, when the CMO unceremoniously stormed into the observation room.

"Colonel O'Neill!" Janet demanded frostily, not acknowledging what Sam was saying. Sam shot a quick glance around the room. Jack was the only one present. Daniel and Teal'c were nowhere to be seen.

"Doctor Fraiser?" Jack replied, not the least intimated by the righteous fury of the smaller woman standing in front of him, scowling up at him like a belligerent Terrier.

"Care to explain to me, why you didn't offer to heal Cassie?" she demanded to know immediately with an unusual lack of tact.

Jack raised his eyebrows astonished, while Sam squirmed behind her friend. It wouldn't take the Colonel long to see through, how that conversation had originated…

And, as a matter of fact, his eyes shot over to her for a second, before concentrating back on Janet. "Talk about a blunt question," he drawled leisurely, but before he could really infuriate Janet when Daniel was nowhere in sight to smooth the crashing waves, he continued: "I thought about it. Really, I did. Several times, in fact. Problem is, I have no idea, how to use those powers. I know you said I've healed Carter, but I don't even know how I did it! I hadn't even intended to do it – no offense, Carter. What I mean is I have no idea what to do with Cassie. If worst comes to worst, I could even harm her!"

Janet's face softened at that. "I'm sorry," she apologized, her rage disappearing instantly. Sighing, she raked a hand through her hair. Her typically accurate bun had already lost several strands of hair that hung around her face.

"Colonel, normally I wouldn't beg that of you, but I'm desperate right now! Please give it a try?" Janet pleaded.

Jack looked at her, then back to Sam. Sam actually held her breath, waiting for his answer, while she gnawed on her lip nervously. The Colonel sighed defeated when he found himself confronted with two determined women, but looked all but pleased. He nodded towards Janet, who exhaled relieved.

"Thank you!" she murmured.

"Don't thank me yet," he cautioned gruffly.

Together they all stepped back into the observation room. Cassie looked at them, slightly confused.

"Mom? What's wrong?" the teen asked alarmed, when she picked up on the strange mood. The CMO stepped up to her and laid a reassuring hand on her upper arm. Sam and Jack hung back, staying side by side.

"Cassie? We'd like to try something," Janet told her.

Skeptically, Cassie looked at Sam. "Did you find a cure?"

Janet continued on, while Sam shot the girl an encouraging smile. "Remember when I told you about Sam and the Colonel being MIA?"

"Yes…?" Cassie answered, completely and visibly failing to see, what that had to do with anything.

"Well, during their… capture… there happened a few… changes," Janet phrased it carefully, not wanting to spill too many facts that would only scare the teen and were, by the way, confidential.

"Mom, I don't understand?" Cassie said confused.

Janet sighed and then motioned back towards Jack. "The Colonel has healing powers now and we'd like to use them to heal you."

Cassie looked at him, her eyes narrowing as if she tried to judge whether or not her mother was cracking jokes. When Jack shrugged in a mock-excusing way, Cassie's eyes widened.

"Really?" she breathed.

"Well," Jack answered with a wide grin. "Don't tell me, you didn't always know I was awesome?"

Janet rolled her eyes, but didn't comment it. "The problem is," she continued unfazed. "The Colonel can't really control it yet, so it might be a bit… risky."

Cassie nodded.

"Do you want to try it?" Sam asked, when the teen didn't say anything further.

Again, Cassie nodded, the trust of the little girl for her friend/substitute-father who had bought her a dog when she'd been younger shining from her eyes.

Now visibly uncomfortable, Jack stepped up to her bed. Janet rounded the bed to stand at Cassie's other side and quickly took her hand to squeeze it. Sam decided to stay behind the Colonel, giving him space, but being close by for moral support. Jack reached out and laid one of his big hands against Cassie's forehead. Sam noticed he inhaled very controlled.

"I trust you, Jack," Cassie said confidently.

"Nice to know," he answered distracted. He seemed to concentrate hard, but obviously had no idea what he had to do.

Sam stepped up a little closer, placing her hand at his back, mirroring the position they had stood in, when Cassie had first been brought to the infirmary, even if reversed. She knew he would realize and hoped it would help him. It was all she could do. It was the only way she could show her support right now.

Sam looked over his shoulder at Cassie's face. The teen studied Jack curiously and next to her, Janet's eyes were glued to her daughter. For a moment, nothing happened and Jack grunted frustrated. Immediately, Sam started to rub small circles with her hand at his back in an attempt to calm him down.

Then, suddenly, Janet inhaled sharply. Sam looked on and saw that underneath the Colonel's hand a soft glowing light had begun to shine out.

"It began like this with Sam, too," Janet whispered, tears glistening in her eyes.

Cassie sighed languorously and closed her eyes with a small smile on her lips. The Colonel concentrated hard, his eyes shutting in the process and the glowing grew stronger. Raptly Janet watched her daughter's vitals on her surveillance monitor and slowly, Sam noticed all values were returning to normal.

Then Janet turned back to the Colonel. "It's done. You can stop," she whispered, taken.

Jack took his hand away from Cassie's forehead and stepped back slightly, bumping into Sam.

"Wow!" Cassie said, sighing comfortable. "What a feeling!"

Then Janet took over, examining her daughter thoroughly. When she apparently found nothing wrong with her, she looked over to the Colonel, saying in something barely above a whisper: "Thank you. Thank you so much!"

Jack fidgeted uncomfortably.

"Cass, try the chess knight," Janet implored.

All eyes shot to the innocent chessboard waiting patiently at the end of her bed. A lone black knight lay in the middle of the board. Sam shot a quick glance at Cassie, but then glued her eyes to the chess piece. If it would stay down, then Cassie really had recovered and lost all her abilities. It was the final test to see, if the young woman was alright. So Sam stared at the chess piece transfixed, almost as if trying to will it to stay down.

For a moment, nothing happened, but then, slowly, the knight rose in the air, floating there harmlessly. Sam stared at it, upset. Janet sighed disappointed and Jack cursed out loud heatedly.

"Mom?" Cassie asked confused.

"It's okay, honey, we'll find another way," Janet reassured her, even though she herself sounded disappointed.

"Mom!" Cassie began anew.

"Don't worry, everything will be alright," Janet said gently, running a hand down Cassie's now cool arm. At least her fever seemed to be gone for good.

"No, mom, you don't understand!" Cassie interrupted. "That's not me!"

"What?" Janet, Sam and Jack asked simultaneously.

"I'm not doing this!" Cassie insisted.

"You don't?" Janet echoed surprised. "But then who…?"

Suddenly, the Colonel turned and looked at Sam. Surprised, she ripped her eyes away from the peacefully somersaulting chess knight to look back at him. Immediately the knight dropped down with a clatter, coming to lie unmoving on the chessboard. Shocked beyond words, Sam's gaze swiveled between the Colonel's serious eyes and the knight.

"Sam…?" Janet asked confused.

Sam had no idea what was suddenly happening.

"Carter?" the Colonel prompted, quietly and quite softly.

Sam took a step back from them all. Her eyes shot back to the knight and as if to mock her, it did a clearly visible twitch.

"Oh god!" she groaned. What the hell was happening?!


	15. Reconnecting

_Again, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Quick Author's note:**_ _Starting with this chapter, we are finally going to concentrate on the main topic in this story: Sam and Jack's relationship. Yay! I've really tried to bring out the emotional connection between them, so let's see how that worked out…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifteen – Reconnecting_

"Carter?", his voice asked from behind her.

Sam suppressed the sigh that threatened to spill from her lips and slowly lifted her head from where it was buried in her hands. She was still sitting where he'd placed her mere minutes before: the damn hard plastic chair in the observation room that still had his jacket placed over the armrest.

"Deep in thought?" the Colonel asked from where he leaned against the door frame.

"Something like that," Sam answered absentmindedly. Actually, and for the first time as far as Sam could remember, all her thinking processes had halted. She just didn't understand. What the hell had just happened in the isolation room? Cassie's psychic abilities were genetically transferred in her race, so there was no possibility that Sam could have gotten 'infected' by her. So how come _she_ suddenly had the ability to let things fly?

The Colonel sighed and pushing himself away from the door frame, he came to stand by her side. He looked through the window at Cassie and silence settled between them.

"I talked to Fraiser," he let her know after a while.

Now Sam sighed. Janet had almost jumped at her the moment they had determined her as the source, the CMO's eyes promising all kinds of waiting examinations. Clearly, there was something wrong with Sam and the Doctor within her friend demanded that she found out what exactly, as fast as possible.

"Hn," Sam answered noncommittal, before continuing, quite sarcastically: "So, which room?"

She looked at him and was greeted with confusion. But then he seemed to understand. "She won't examine you tonight," he assured her.

"No?" Sam inquired, quite surprised.

"I asked her not to," the Colonel answered.

This surprised her even more. "Why not?"

"Because she needs some sleep," he answered and then looked directly back at her. "And you do, too, Major!"

Sam gazed at him stunned. His dark eyes bored into her and suddenly self-conscious, Sam knew what he saw: her even paler complexion, her exhausted expression and the circles under her eyes. Abruptly she wished that, sometime, she had taken the time to cover them up with make-up. But she had just had more pressing problems.

His eyes softened, when she stared at him frozen, like a deer caught in headlights. "Carter, when have you last slept?" he asked, worry evident in his voice.

Oh fine, now she felt guilty for having neglected herself, again. How did he do it to make her have a guilty conscience with just a glance?

Nevertheless, he had a point. Sam actually had to think it through, before she could answer him. The last night she'd slept through completely? Must have been sometime she had still shared the isolation room with him.

"I'm not sure," she answered honestly.

He crouched down, until he was level with her eyes. "Have nightmares?" he asked.

She gulped. How did he know? She hadn't told anyone aside from Janet, but she was her Doctor. Apart from that? Nobody. She hadn't even told Daniel! Rather, she had tried her best to forget about them when awake. It really was enough they were ruining her nights as it was.

"It's normal," he said at her questioning glance.

Sam licked her lips. Normal? He considered that normal?

"Do you have them, too?" she asked, slightly insecure if she wasn't overstepping a boundary with him by asking something so personal.

"Sometimes," he answered evasively.

She stared at him transfixed. He chuckled lowly. "C'mon," he said. "You need a night of decent sleep. We'll face that problem tomorrow."

 _We'll face that problem_ …

His words bounced back and forth in her head. He'd said 'we'.

Jack stood up, now no longer bothered by his bad knees and held out a hand for her. Sam took it and let herself get hoisted to her feet. He took his abandoned jacket and hung it around her shoulders, before leading them out of the observation platform. Wordlessly, they walked through the hallways to the elevator and together they rode down to Level 25, where their private quarters were. In complete silence they made their way through the dark, deserted hallway. Since they were both SG-1 and had been in the program from the beginning, their quarters were placed all next to each other's. The Colonel's was directly at the back of the hallway on the left side, opposite of Daniel's. Sam's was the one next to the Colonel's, opposite of Teal'c's.

Sam followed him to the door of his quarters and then took his jacket from her shoulders. She held it out to him. "Thank you, sir," she whispered.

He nodded and then reached out for the jacket. But he didn't take it. Instead, his fingers closed around her wrist, gently holding it. Her blood pressure spiked very noticeably when she felt his long, warm fingers close around her smaller wrist, his hold on her tender but firm.

"Carter?" he asked.

"Yes, sir?" she answered, her mouth suddenly going dry.

He looked at her with an unfamiliar, intense gaze and she couldn't help the blush that spread over her cheeks immediately.

Then he nodded towards the door to his quarters. "Stay?" he asked.

Sam felt her jaw almost hit the ground, while her eyebrows shot up surprised. _What!?_

"Sir!" she exclaimed, more taken completely by surprise than affronted.

He raised an eyebrow in a Teal'c-like manner, before he snickered amused. "Carter, I didn't mean it like _that_!" he clarified. "Sometimes, company helps."

He motioned at her head and suddenly, Sam understood that he was talking about her dreams. Oh.

"Sometimes, being alone makes it worse," he explained and it sounded as if he was talking from experience. She nodded, feeling that it made sense. When she had slept next to him in the isolation room, she hadn't been plagued by those nightmares, after all.

Again he motioned towards his quarters. "So, want to stay?"

She was aware that this was a decision that she would regret whatever she would choose. She would regret saying 'yes' in one way or another, but she would also regret it if she said 'no'. So, going by that logic, what did she have to lose? Yes, she should probably think about how that would look and yes, she should probably decline him for sooo many reasons, but strangely, she didn't want to. The thought of a calm night was tempting, a night with him by her side even more so. Her last nights had been a catastrophe and considering her recovery in the isolation room, her illness and her imprisonment before that, Sam couldn't even remember the last halfway decent night she had had. She _longed_ for a quiet night to catch up on the weeks of sleep she still lacked.

So, for once throwing all caution and appropriateness in the wind, Sam nodded, almost shyly. The Colonel smiled and opened the door for them with his keycard. She stepped in, while he switched on the light, trying not to feel as if she was trespassing forbidden ground. She'd been to his quarters once or twice to visit him or to get him for something, but she had wisely stayed at the door frame, on safe grounds. She had had the distinct impression that entering his territory would not end well for her – and her sanity – so Sam had always avoided it.

And now here she was, throwing all caution out of the proverbial window.

The Colonel passed her and took his jacket from her to dump it on a pile of worn clothes in a corner of his room. "You can take the bed," he offered.

She looked at him. "Where will you sleep, sir?" she asked, cursing that her voice sounded so breathless.

He motioned over to an armchair that stood in front of the TV that was almost buried underneath a game console and the cables hanging all around from it. Sam wanted to protest but what should she say? There was no way he would let _her_ sleep in that chair, whatever she might beg or threaten with. That was just not the way Jack O'Neill was. And in the end, he could always make it an order.

Without noticing her mental turmoil, the Colonel sat down in the armchair and began to untie the laces on his combat boots. It actually took Sam a moment to comprehend that he was preparing to undress! But then she swirled around, forbidding herself to look. When she heard his belt unbuckle and clothes rustle, which she highly feared to be his pants hitting the floor, she could feel even more blood rush to her cheeks. Yep, staying here was definitely a bad idea.

More rustles, but this time different ones. Then Sam heard the chair creek and with an amused voice, the Colonel said: "You can look, y'know?"

Sam risked a glance and found him sitting in the armchair with a blanket placed over his legs. His BDU pants had joined the pile of dirty clothes and her brain actually drew a blank at her attempt to imagine what he was now wearing under the blanket. Couldn't be more than his underwear – and yes, she should so not think about that!

"Switch off the light?" he asked, apparently completely unfazed by the situation.

Sam looked up again and realized that he had turned on the tiny desk lamp on the desk next to the armchair. He had put his feet on the desk and was obviously trying to get comfortable, even if his frame appeared too large for the armchair.

Sam did as asked and the room fell into half-darkness, only a circle of light behind him illuminating the modest-sized room. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes, obviously giving her privacy to change. But then again, she hadn't really brought any pajamas or sleeping clothes in the first place. Sam snuck over to his bed and sat down. Following his example, she started with the boots and undid them. Neatly, she placed her socks in it. For a second she debated pulling off her t-shirt, but then decided against it. So she just shed her pants, dropping them on her boots, and clad in t-shirt and panties, she crawled under the covers. She pulled the blanket tight around her and buried her head in his pillow, deeply inhaling his scent.

"All set?" he asked from his makeshift bed.

"Yes, sir," she whispered back.

He switched off the light. Sam curled into a ball and burrowed deeper into his bed. It smelled like him. Sighing, she relaxed at last. It was helping, she realized immediately. His presence really did help her calm down. For the first time in days she felt calm, the all-present tension leaving her exhausted body. Being in the constant stress she had been in, Sam only felt the amount of tension she had been under now that it slowly faded from her body. Inwardly, she wasn't all that surprised anymore she had been unable to sleep. There had just been too many things, too many feelings and too many thoughts swarming her head that wouldn't leave her alone to rest. But the Colonel's presence was making her feel safe and protected unlike anything else. Sam was trained, fit and most of the time armed, but there was just something about Jack's close presence that made her relax and finally let her guard down as she hadn't been able to no matter how much she knew logically she was safe. Finally she could let herself sink into the depths of sleep without having to worry about anything. Finally she didn't have to track her surroundings subconsciously in a dozing way of sleeping.

It was almost like sleeping in his company while off-world. Sam felt safe even though they could be in a possibly hostile environment because knowing the Colonel and his almost foreseeing instincts she knew he would pick up on any possible threat even if she would fail to notice it and nothing would happen to her because he would prevent it. Never mind that Sam was a trained Air Force officer herself she knew unfailingly that Jack would protect her no matter the threat or if she did even want it. Much like he would protect Daniel and even Teal'c. He just wouldn't let anything happen to his team and the rock-solid knowledge was certainly reassuring.

So knowing all this, Sam waited for sleep to claim her. And in spite of all the nights before, she didn't dread the sleep in anxious expectation of the nightmares. Instead, she tried to welcome it, but still it wouldn't come. The simple fact that she was lying in Colonel O'Neill's bed while he slept only a few feet away was so overwhelming, so exciting, Sam couldn't calm down completely. Okay, she had slept next to him uncountable times on off-world missions, sharing a tent with him, but somehow this felt… way more intimate. Sam felt wide awake, even though her body was screaming for rest. She was so tired her whole body felt heavy, but her overactive mind wouldn't let her rest.

"Y'know, Carter? I can hear those wheels behind your forehead turn 'til here," Jack said into the silence unexpected, almost making her jump.

"I'm sorry, sir!" she murmured, her voice muffled by his pillow. Again, she blushed. She hadn't wanted to disturb him.

He sighed and a creaking sound told her, he had stood up. She raised her head off his pillow, when she heard his footsteps approach. In the complete darkness of the room she couldn't see him and had to rely on sound to tell what he was doing. The mattress creaked when he sat down next to her and the rustling of cloth on cloth told her he had brought his blanket with him.

"That bad?" he wanted to know.

"What?" she asked back, feeling as if she'd lost the line of their conversation.

"The dreams," he clarified. "So bad you're afraid to sleep?"

"No," she said. "It's just… This is just… unfamiliar."

She could feel him nod more than she could see it in the darkness of his room. "You want to go to your room?" he suggested.

"No!" she blurted out immediately. Now she pictured him raise the brows at her. That she couldn't see his reactions was making it difficult for her to judge his mood, but at the same time she was quite glad the darkness hid her constant blushing.

"You were right," she explained her outburst. "Company does help. I feel better… being here."

He sighed, but not exasperated, rather sounding pensive. "Want me to wait with you until you're asleep?" he offered.

"You would?" she asked breathless.

For a moment he didn't answer, but then he simply said: "Yes."

She smiled, widely, and her voice was positively bright when she whispered: "Thank you, sir."

Sam laid back down, her eyes glued to the spot where he sat by her side. He yawned audibly.

Sam debated with herself for a moment, unsure if she should really offer it seeing that the standard beds in the private quarters were one-man-sized, but feeling courageous, she whispered: "You could lie down, you know? This is your bed, after all."

Despite the darkness she could feel his eyes on her almost immediately. "You wouldn't mind?" he asked.

"Sir, we have laid next to each other so many times off-world," she declared bravely, trying to ignore the way she didn't dare use the word 'sleep'.

The mattress shifted and wobbled, while he slid down next to her. When he laid down, the mattress caved in and she slid towards him. He turned and Sam imagined him to lie on his side, facing her, when his voice asked impossibly close: "That okay?"

"Yes," she murmured back, her voice barely above a breath. Slowly, she stretched out her legs, so she wouldn't take up too much space on the bed. After all, it was made for one person, not for two. Her knee bumped into his thigh.

"Sorry, sir!" she said immediately.

"'S alright," he answered sleepily.

Sam, however, felt like bursting with nervous energy at his close proximity. It was as wonderful as it was frightening. And she tried her best to not think about how many rules they were probably breaking with this.

"Sam. Stop thinking," he ordered sluggishly, probably already halfway into sleep.

Sam hummed something noncommittal in response and tried to settle down so she wouldn't disturb him anymore. The Colonel was lying quiet and still, his breaths the only sound in the silence of the room. Sam couldn't see him but she heard the rustling of his blanket when he moved ever so slightly and she could feel the warmth of his body drifting over to her due to the narrow space. Soon Sam heard his breathing deepen and slow down and she knew he had fallen asleep. She however still couldn't. His close proximity ensured that Sam felt all tingly no matter how comfortable she did feel in his presence. And yet, at the same time, his close proximity ensured she felt calm and at ease and so she knew she would fall asleep sooner or later and calmly waited for it.

Sam had no idea when she actually did manage to fall asleep but she became aware on some subconscious level that she was sleeping whenever she perked up disorientated when a heavy body moved next to her. Obviously not used to having to share a bed, the Colonel moved around freely, bumping into her occasionally and jolting her awake. Sam on her part was exhausted enough to fall asleep again immediately after, no matter what he hit with his knees or elbows. That was until something Sam highly feared to be his fist knocked into her temple roughly. Grumbling, Sam turned onto her side, presenting him with her back, and not able to hold herself back, she bumped her heel not-so-gently into his shin to remind him of her presence. To her complete astonishment though, he then reached over. His hand found her shoulder in the darkness and then slid down her front. With a quick, surprisingly strong tug he pulled her back against his frame. Sam stiffened reflexively while his hand settled against the shoulder she was lying on, his arm a protective shield around her. And then Sam actually held her breath when she felt his face nuzzle into her hair. He shifted his head slightly and she felt his chin move at the back of her head. His slow, even breath blew over her hair, telling her he was still sleeping soundly. His long, lean frame was now intimately pressed against hers, only separated by their blankets, and his body heat enveloped her comfortably.

Well, that had been _unexpected_ , Sam thought, rather stumped. But, oh, did it feel good!

Sam sighed contently. She felt almost surrounded by him and she had never felt so safe, so protected in her life.

Jack murmured something incomprehensible into her hair and although Sam didn't understand the actual words, she felt her body react to his voice. Feeling strangely content, she relaxed completely and the heaviness took hold of her body once more, dragging her down towards sleep. Her eyes fell close again and her breath blew over his hand resting on her shoulder, when she exhaled again without noticing. For once, Sam didn't even think of fighting the very much against-the-regs position they had ended up in.

When sleep finally claimed her again, she noted absentmindedly that, just before he'd fallen asleep, the Colonel had called her 'Sam'.


	16. Approaching

_Again, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Author's note:**_ _So, there's been the request for another chapter as a Halloween Special and since I was thinking 'why the hell not', here it is. Actually, where I live Halloween's not really celebrated (yet) so I didn't think of that, but I guess in a few countries it's kind of a special occasion. So I hope y'all have lots of fun and still find the time to read the new chapter._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Sixteen – Approaching_

Sam slowly drifted out of sleep. She could feel herself waking up gradually even though she didn't really want to. She felt unusually at ease and pleasantly relaxed, a state she wasn't willing to let go of, yet. A strange, unfamiliar feeling of contentment floated through her body, making her sigh happily. She felt peaceful, recovered and thoroughly rested. Warmth enveloped her and a heady, compelling smell wafted all around her. Sam had the indistinct impression that something about this should somehow feel wrong to her, but being in the lazy state of mind she was, she didn't feel the slightest intention to look closer into it.

Idly, she noticed she was lying on something soft, warm and comfortable. It felt suspiciously like waking up late on a Sunday morning in her own bed with her cuddly false-fur blanket she'd dragged up to her bedroom from its intended place on her couch. But the total silence and the lack of light told Sam that she wasn't at her home. Had she been at her home, she would have heard her neighbors through the windows and sunlight would have streamed into her bedroom. The fact that everything was silent and dark however told her she was within Cheyenne Mountain, the thick concrete walls blocking out all environmental sounds and additional lights. Still, the bed in her private quarters had never felt so comfortable!

Sam yawned leisurely. Somehow she didn't have the impression she was in her room. This here felt different somehow.

Then, suddenly, her bed beneath her shifted. Surprised, Sam felt herself get jostled around for a second, before the nice warmth settled around her again. Confused, Sam opened her eyes only to, naturally, get greeted with the total darkness of the room. She couldn't really see much, even though her eyes had already adjusted. The only things she could make out were shadows and vague shapes. Sam turned her head to look around, when all of a sudden an unfamiliar sound reached her ear and she tensed. She knew this sound. It was a heartbeat. What she didn't know, though, was how there could be another heartbeat. Here, with her. Puzzled, Sam reached out and let her hand run over her surroundings. Warm and soft, yet unyielding. What…?

Then Sam understood. There was another body lying underneath hers! Soft, even breathing sounds reached her ears, telling her that whoever was with her was still sound asleep. Sam wrecked her brain. What the hell had happened?

And then she remembered. Everything they'd gone through with Cassie, Sam's sudden 'powers', her exhaustion, the Colonel's offer…

Sam paled, when realization finally settled in. She was lying in the Colonel's bed and from the feel of it, even on top of him! How had that happened? Sam tried not to panic. It had all started innocent enough, nothing to get anxious about. He had merely wanted to help her out and then they'd fallen asleep next to each other. Nothing worth a court-martial until now. Okay, he might have pulled her against him sometime during the night but he had done that in his sleep and she had been exhausted enough to not care about fighting him on it. And the bed really wasn't that wide so it was no wonder they'd ended up… um, entangled, was it? Sam fiercely tried to quash the thought that if she'd been Daniel (or anyone else for that matter), then there would have been no way the Colonel would have ever woken up in an even remotely similar position to the one they were lying in right now.

Sighing, Sam tried to relax again, trying to enjoy this unexpected treat as long as it lasted. She let herself ease back against his frame, indulging in how her body fitted against his. Her cheek rested on his pecs, his unique scent drifting up to her from his t-shirt, and her left hand was on top of his stomach, moving slowly up and down with each breath he took. His chin touched her forehead and his breath moved a few strands of her hair. His left arm was slung around her body, pressing her to him. Her left leg had somehow managed to come to rest thrown across his thighs, his right hand on top of her bare knee, while her right leg was pressed up against his left. They were both still enveloped in their blankets, but from the obvious turning they'd done during the night, they weren't completely covered by them anymore. Legs and arms had gotten free and his blanket had slid down his chest to bunch around his hips. But then again, neither of them had noticed, because the cold settling in had been blocked out by the other's body.

If there weren't so many things – like, say, common sense and a bunch of regulations – that made that illegal, Sam would be very much enjoying herself right now. Sam knew it wouldn't do them any good to lie entangled like that and it would probably be better if the Colonel didn't find her sprawled all over him when he woke up. So she should get up and retreat to her own room soon, but certainly she could steal another moment, before she had to leave? Sam couldn't help herself. She just couldn't pass up such a good opportunity! So she nuzzled in closer, burying her nose in his chest to inhale his addicting scent, enjoying the warmth coming from him.

"Comfortable, Carter?" his voice asked suddenly with a very audible smirk in it.

Sam froze, but when he chuckled amused at having successfully surprised her, she relaxed again. So he'd already been awake. It really shouldn't surprise her. The Colonel was ex-black-ops. Faking sleep would be a piece of cake for him.

"That was mean, sir," she scolded.

His hand on her ribcage slid up to her shoulder and squeezed lightly, his long fingers a very welcome weight on top of her shirt and skin. Sam reveled in the attention the man was paying her, feeling all special suddenly.

"Carter, you're all over me and still insist on calling me 'sir'?" he questioned. He was very noticeably having his fun at their situation. Somehow, it made Sam feel stupid for having worried about anything when he took it that lightly.

"I'm not 'all over you', _sir_ ," she corrected emphasized, not even thinking about foregoing the rank. It was already a serious danger to her sanity that she was lying with him, on top of him, in his bed. Calling him Jack in _this_ situation? She was sure to blow!

"No?" he asked back. "How'd you call that? Entangled? Intertwined? Wrapped around?"

"Sir!" Sam cut him off, feeling herself blush from his _descriptions_. She tried standing up, tried to escape the compromising situation they were in, but his arm held her back, keeping her trapped against his body.

"Sir, I could _correct_ that state, if you'd let me!" she huffed.

He began laughing. Sam had no idea, when she'd last heard the Colonel laugh fully and whole-heartedly, so it somehow soothed the fact that he was laughing at her. Still, the deep rumble of his laughter that shook her body on top of his when it ran through his chest, and the fact that he had finally relaxed in her company again when all he'd done the last months was to avoid or ignore her, was enough to send her heart soaring, prompting her to smile to his fun, even though she wanted to scold him for making fun of her.

"You misunderstand me, Carter," he grinned. "I've got nothing against that _state_."

Now Sam was confused and, again, she felt herself blush. But then she realized what he was doing. _He was flirting with her!_ To say that she was stunned would be an understatement. They hadn't done this in forever! When they'd first gotten to know each other and had explored the unexpected, but all the more strong attraction between them, they had flirted with each other. Until there had been the first hints that it ran deeper than just physical attraction or a simple infatuation. Then the flirting had almost completely and abruptly stopped. And going by the way he had treated her those last months, flirting had been the last thing Sam would have expected from him. First he'd brushed her off, pretty much shutting her out of his life, then he'd avoided her after their stunt going MIA, then he asked her to sleep in his bed and now he was flirting with her! Even for the Colonel that was… confusing.

His right hand suddenly began to draw random patterns on her knee. "Stop overthinking, Carter," he said amused. "That's not going to show up in any report, so why not enjoy the break?"

Oh? So that was what this was?

Sam fidgeted, partly uncomfortable because he took it so lightly, partly because she was insecure how to handle the situation. Suddenly, his hand shot up from her knee to grab hold of her hip through her blanket. Immediately, Sam halted her movement, afraid she'd done something wrong.

"So… how did you sleep?" he asked, sounding slightly strained all of a sudden.

A big grin spread across her face. "Very good," she admitted truthfully. "I haven't slept that good in years, I think."

"That's… good," he answered.

"Your presence had a very calming effect, sir," she thanked him.

"Why, thank you, Carter," he murmured back sarcastically. "Any man would just _love_ to hear that while in bed with you."

Sam raised an eyebrow, forgetting that he couldn't see it due to the darkness and their close proximity.

"Sir?" she began puzzled, but he interrupted her.

"Forget it, Carter," he said. "I'm glad, I could help you."

Silence fell between them and Sam felt prompted to say something.

"How did you sleep, sir?" she asked the first thing that came to her mind.

His hand left her hip and from the movement, Sam guessed he ran a hand through his hair before he returned it to its former position, missing by a few inches so that it now rested on her thigh.

"Pretty good given the circumstances," he answered honestly.

Given the circumstances. Sam felt sad and happy at the same time at the little reminder of the eventful past day. She hated that she was again causing him to worry, but a selfish, small part of her was thankful that he cared about her enough that he was worrying.

She shifted and pulled her right arm out from under his body. Then she laid her right hand on his pecs and rested her chin on it so that she could look up at him, even if she could only vaguely recognize his features in the dark.

"I'm sorry, sir," she said earnestly and then: "Thank you very much."

"Why thank me?" he answered confused.

"For saving Cassie," she explained. To emphasize her words and show him how grateful she really felt, her free hand stroked over his stomach a few times.

He shifted, tucking down his chin so he could study her face. "Of course," he said. "Cassie's one of the few women I'd do anything for."

Sam smiled brightly. In Jack O'Neill's world that was as close to a love declaration as it would get. He really liked Cassie a lot.

"I love her, too," she agreed. "So thank you for rescuing her."

"Sure," he answered certainly.

"How'd you do it?" Sam asked humbly.

"What?" he inquired. "Heal Cassie?"

She nodded.

"It was your idea. Or rather something you said about the Ancients," he admitted.

"What I said?"

"Yeah. You said Ancient technology worked by thought and most Ancient devices activate by the presence of the ATA gene, so I thought my healing powers could work like that, too," he explained. "I… merely thought it."

"You thought it?" she echoed, instantly reminded of something similar Cassie had said about her powers.

Sam felt him nod. "Yeah, I just thought I wanted to heal Cassie. And it worked. Somehow. Was kinda difficult, though."

"Well, sir, you're not really used to your new abilities, so I'd assume it would take some training," Sam agreed.

"Probably," he agreed noncommittal.

For a moment, silence reigned between them and Sam could tell that he was thinking something through. It gave her thoughts the time to travel, too, and again, she was reminded of all what had happened yesterday.

"So I guess I'll have to go to the infirmary soon?" she asked with a somewhat small voice. She didn't want to admit it, not even to herself, but the thought of getting restricted to the infirmary yet again scared her. First Adrian Conrad and his hospital, then the alien laboratory cell and then her recovery in the isolation room in the SGC. She had her fair share of hospital beds to last her for a decent while.

"I'll go with you," he said. It reassured Sam enormously. She had meant what she'd said earlier: his presence had a calming effect on her – most of the times, anyways. Nothing was as bad when he was with her. With him by her side, she always felt stronger and more confident. Somehow, his presence alone always managed to block out her negative thoughts and feelings, all the insecurities gnawing on her.

Sam let her head roll to the side so that her cheek rested on his chest once more and his steady heartbeat echoed in her ears. "Thank you…" she murmured.

She could feel his gaze on her and despite the darkness she knew immediately that he looked right into her eyes. He opened his mouth to answer something, when suddenly a sound knock on his door interrupted them. Sam felt Jack tense beneath her and heard him scowl humbly. She made to move away from him so he could get up, but again his arm prevented her from that. She looked questioningly at him, but didn't dare ask something. She didn't want to risk the chance that whoever was out there would only _suspect_ her to be here with him.

"Jack? Jack, are you awake?" Daniel's voice yelled through the thick doors.

"I don't believe it!" Jack groaned quietly.

"JACK?" Daniel insisted loudly from the other side of the door.

"Sir, shouldn't you…?" Sam whispered, raising her head to speak as close to his ear as possible.

From this close proximity, she could see him shut his eyes exasperated before he hissed enraged: "Oh, fer cryin' out loud!"

He gently disentangled himself from her and slid out from underneath her. The moment he left her however his movements got furious. He shot up from the bed and fuming, he kicked the thin blanket away that had twisted around his legs. Then he stomped towards the door while Sam took the opportunity to smooth out her own blanket and hide herself under it, her head buried in his pillow. Here, in the relative safety of his room and his presence, she felt comfortable and at ease; so much indeed that she was more inclined to stay than to leave. However, reality didn't let itself get shut out indefinitely. In fact, it had just, quite literally, knocked on the door, in the form of Daniel.

The Colonel ripped his door open, careful that it was only by a crack and that he blocked all view into the room. Sam risked a glance from her position. She couldn't see Daniel from her position, but she had a spectacular sight on the Colonel who was illuminated by the light coming from the hallway. He was wearing his black BDU t-shirt and dark grey boxer shorts with the Simpsons logotype stitched into the waistband which she could only see at a certain spot where his shirt had ridden up his back. Sam had admittedly seen him without a shirt once or twice, but without pants? Not so much. So the sight of his long, muscular and quite naked legs and his sparsely covered six was not only unfamiliar, but quite intimate. Sam felt another blush threaten to overtake her and averted her eyes to a safer place: his face. His sleepy eyes squinted into the sudden brightness and made his annoyance even more visible. The light coming from the hall gave his jaw hard edges and played over his tightly pressed together lips. And his hair was a complete mess, revealing that he'd just gotten out of bed.

" _What?!_ " he snapped at Daniel heatedly. Sam was surprised by the undeniably hard voice the Colonel was using on their friend and Daniel seemed to think of it similarly because it actually took the linguist a moment to answer.

"Ah… did I wake you…?" the archaeologist asked warily, apparently trying to estimate the Colonel's unexpected bad mood.

"No, Danny-boy, I'm usually awake at…" the Colonel glanced back into the room to the clock hanging on the wall, before continuing with dripping sarcasm: "0530 in the morning!"

Daniel winced audibly and Sam had to suppress a snicker. She would place any bet that her friend had pulled another all-nighter in his lab and hadn't even looked at the time before coming here.

"I'm surprised, you're already awake," the Colonel grumbled at their friend.

"Um…" Daniel hesitated and Sam could almost picture him fidget. "When you ordered us to get some sleep yesterday, I did – and then I woke up in the middle of the night and decided to get a few things done and–"

"Oh, for cryin' out loud, Daniel, get to the point!" the Colonel interrupted, rubbing his temples for emphasize. "What do you want?"

"Ah, actually I was looking for Sam," Daniel confessed, his voice sounding guilty. "I wanted to go eat some breakfast with her."

"And how in the world did you get the impression you'd find her here?" the Colonel pressed on.

"I didn't," Daniel said surprised. "I just wanted to ask you, if you've seen her."

The Colonel was silent for a moment and then answered, as much to Daniel's surprise as to Sam's: "Actually, I have."

Sam's heart skipped a beat. What was he doing?

"Really?" Daniel questioned. "Where?"

The Colonel motioned behind himself. Silence greeted him at that. Sam actually held her breath. She really had no idea, what he thought to achieve with that.

"Ah, Jack?" Daniel asked confused.

The man in question sighed. "She's here, Daniel," he clarified for the confused linguist.

"Here? Where?" the archaeologist inquired.

"Sleeping in my bed," the Colonel said calmly.

Now Sam positively heard Daniel choke. "She's what?!"

"God, Danny, no need for a fuss," the Colonel said, still suspiciously composed. "She's having nightmares and I told her, company would help."

"Did you," Daniel said, stumped.

"Indeed," the Colonel smiled.

"And, um… where did you… sleep?" Daniel wanted to know, by now sounding quite uncomfortable.

"Chair," the Colonel answered promptly, his voice absolutely not betraying the big fat lie he was telling.

"Oh. I see.", Daniel said trustingly, sounding relieved.

"Want me to tell her you're waiting for her?" Jack asked.

"Huh? I thought you said she'd be sleeping?" Daniel shot back.

Sam saw the Colonel roll his eyes. "Well, I'm sure after the commotion you've just caused, she's awake."

"Sorry," Daniel said apologetically. "Um, I'll just wait for her in my room."

"You do that, Space-monkey."

And with this, the Colonel shut the door in Daniel's face. He switched on the light and then came over to sit on the bed next to Sam.

Sam straightened up to lean on her elbows, looking at him unsure. "Sir, was that a good idea?" she asked.

He shrugged. "Probably not, but we're on the security tapes anyways and so Daniel can at least start the right rumors."

Sam suddenly understood. Of course. While the private quarters had no surveillance cameras to ensure privacy, the hallways still had them and naturally, they would have recorded her going into his room without coming out until the next morning. So, if they were being questioned, they at least had an excuse and could claim Daniel as a witness. They both trusted on their friend to have their backs and however much Daniel might complain about them and their taking him for granted, he'd back them up without a second thought should they need it.

"You're right, sir," she said.

He nodded absentmindedly. "So, now that you've woken up, I shall tell you that Daniel is waiting for you."

She smiled and leaned over to fish for her discarded clothes. "That much I heard."

While Sam got into her pants and began lacing up her boots, Jack let himself fall back onto the bed, closing his eyes.

"You're not getting up?" she wanted to know.

"In a minute," he decided. "Or two."

"You're coming to the commissary with us?" Sam questioned further.

He yawned and scrubbed a hand over his face. "Nah, I think I'm in for a shower and then some more paperwork."

"Want me to get you something?" she suggested.

"Why not? Bring it to me, when you're about to go to the infirmary and then we can go together."

"Okay," she agreed. She stepped around the bed and walked towards the door. At the door, she looked back to his unmoving form, feeling a small, grateful smile tuck at her lips. He'd done much for her this night and she loved him more with every one of these small gestures of his.

"Sir?" she asked.

"Hm?" he grunted, indicating that he was listening.

"Thank you."

He looked up at her. "Anytime, Carter. Anytime."

And with this, she stepped out of his room, leaving him back. While she walked the small distance to her room for a quick stop before she met up with Daniel, she contemplated the thoughts of the past evening. She had been wrong. She had not regretted the night with him. But she had been right in being wary of the night. Because while Sam was glad that the closeness between her and the Colonel was back, she could also clearly feel that something had changed between them. She had no idea what it was, but she certainly felt it. Something was different.

* * *

 _A/N: Okay, I realize this could be seen bordering on OOC, but I always imagined Sam and Jack to be a couple who, given the permission and the privacy, would be kind of a cuddling couple who'd seek out physical contact with the other._

 _And I hope, you're all still smiling after this chapter :)  
_


	17. Examining

_As always, thanks to all who read, follow and review this story!_

 _ **Little Author's note:**_ _So glad, you seemed to like the last two chapters! And I can promise there will come more like that in the future._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Seventeen – Examining_

Jack yawned. Discreetly, of course. He didn't want to give the impression he was bored or Fraiser was likely to throw him out. He was, by no means, feeling bored. Okay, so those marathon examinations weren't really his thing, but first of all, he wasn't the one subjected to it and second, if he had to see, read or sign another _important_ document he would fucking go crazy so that here was actually kinda like a breather for him.

In fact, Jack was merely tired. He had not lied to Carter when he'd told her this morning he had slept good, he really had. He had just 'forgotten' to mention that it had just been a few hours. He hadn't wanted her to worry. He had slept decently those few hours and normally that was more than enough for him to operate on. And he was pretty sure, she would blame it on herself, even if it wasn't her fault that he had woken up in the middle of the night and his body had refused to let him go back to sleep.

Okay, maybe it had to do with her that he hadn't been able to fall back asleep, but it was nothing she should blame herself for. Actually, Jack's trained senses had woken him somewhere around two o'clock in the morning after a few, decent, much-needed hours of sleep, when he had felt an unfamiliar presence snuggle up to him. His black-ops-training ensured that whenever he was on base or on missions he only slept lightly, always on alert, and so the feeling of another body close to his, when he had thought himself to be alone in his quarters, had woken him. He had pretty much immediately remembered that Carter was with him and his alert had receded. But the fact that she had apparently decided in her sleep to exchange his chest for the pillow made his body go into a whole other kind of alert and his hormones had refused him any sleep for the rest of the night. Really, _how old was he again?_ But the simple fact that it had been years since he had slept next to a woman – and it was Carter, fer cryin' out loud! – had assured that his body hadn't cared the least about his biological age but had done a spontaneous trip back to youth.

So Jack had lain tense as a plank for a good half hour from what the clock on his nightstand had counted and had watched the crown of Carter's head rise and fall slightly with his breaths, doing his damnedest to not touch her in any inappropriate way. And then he had decided that he was being downright stupid. First of all, she wouldn't notice in her sleep if he'd touch her and second, _who the hell cared, anyways?!_ He was a grown man and it wasn't as if they hadn't ever touched each other before! Besides, had he not just decided to do something about their situation? That here would be the perfect opportunity to start. It was only habit that made him hold back on any intimate gesture towards her and made him double-check their surroundings for any witnesses.

So Jack had laid his arm around her, deciding that this was a good starting point without being too obvious and straight-forward. Because, while he might be ready to change something, that didn't mean Carter was on board. Yes, they had admitted their feelings for each other, somehow, but it had been towards a machine and a Tok'ra scientist who had operated it! They had never talked about it face-to-face. And then there was still the good chance that, given the way he'd treated her the last months, she was fed up to the back teeth with his attitude and would tell him to shove his feelings someplace the sun didn't shine…

Okay, probably not with these words, because he couldn't imagine Carter ever use them, but he was pretty sure her genius mind would think of something fitting.

The point was, he was in no way sure what she was still feeling towards him. Did she still care? Was she angry, mad, annoyed, frustrated, fed up? Or all at once? He didn't know anymore.

But Jack was determined to find out. He wanted to right what he'd done wrong between them. So when she'd woken up, he had tested his waters with her. He had tried some light flirting and mostly, she'd gone with the flow. Even in the total darkness of his room he had been able to feel her surprise and her confusion, but she had still allowed the body contact between them. She hadn't moved away from him and hadn't smacked his hands away. They hadn't done much but cuddle with the safe barrier of their blankets between them but that was okay for Jack. It was a starting point after all and he didn't trust himself at all to keep it light with her if there had been direct skin contact.

Still, Jack wasn't delusional. A bit contact might have brought the familiar closeness between them back, but it didn't close the rift the past months had created. Sooner or later, and that was not a thought Jack enjoyed much, they had to talk it through, if he wanted to make this work somehow. He needed to know her opinion; needed to know, if she even wanted what he wanted. And if she did, then they had to work out a way how to handle the situation, together. He couldn't decide for her and he also didn't want to. She was as much a part of this as he was. And they would do this as they did most things: in mutual understanding and agreement.

A subtle beep suddenly announced that the CT had finished. Jack looked over Janet's shoulder through the thick glass of the observation window and saw Carter's body emerge bit by bit from the large machine. He left the Doc to study the pictures of Carter's brain and sauntered into the room. Sam's face was tense, while she waited for the machine to release her enough so that she could sit up.

Stuffing his hands in his pants' pockets, Jack came to stand by her legs, while the CT audibly shut down. She swung her legs over the stretcher and sat up.

"I don't like these things," she announced grimly.

Jack looked at the innocent CT. He was way more familiar with the X-rays, but from the little experience he had, the CT was normally at least an uncomplicated, painless procedure. But he guessed, even Carter's seemingly unending patience had to have an end and Fraiser had really put her through everything their medical bay had.

Speaking of the good Doctor, Janet suddenly opened the doors and stepped in. Her eyes were glued to Sam's medical file, which held the recently shot pictures, and routinely, she walked over to her patient.

"So?" Sam asked nervously and Jack couldn't help himself. Unnoticed, he made a step closer to her, trying to support her with his presence.

"Well," Janet began hesitant. "Neither the X-rays, nor the ultrasonic sound, the MRI or the CT have shown any abnormalities. Your body is as physically fine as it has been before."

"So how come she's able to levitate things?" Jack asked.

Janet scrunched up her brows and Jack could just tell neither he nor Carter would like what she was going to say next. "There could be smaller changes. On the cellular level. But I have to wait for the lab's results, before I can say anything," the Doc explained.

Sam sighed audibly, her body slumping disappointed.

"What?" Jack asked annoyed. He _hated_ when all knew what was left unsaid but him.

Sam gnawed on her lower lip, while Janet clarified: "If there are changes incorporated in her very cells, then chances are high the alterations are permanent, meaning there are slight modifications to her DNA and I can't do anything to reverse it anymore."

Jack gulped. That didn't sound too good.

"It doesn't have to mean anything," Janet soothed, more to Sam than to him. "If there were serious changes, then you'd have bigger problems than just a few psychic abilities."

Jack snorted dryly. If that were Napoleon's attempts at cheering up a friend, then she should leave that job to Daniel.

"Could there be more _problems_?" he inquired pointedly.

Janet contemplated that for a moment. "I don't think so, sir," she answered, sounding pretty confident. "If there were bigger changes, then we'd have noticed already. The only reason those changes could have happened in the first place is probably the drug Sam has been subjected to. I noticed during my first examinations that the remnants of the drug counteracted with the naquadah in her blood, but I couldn't find any long-lasting effects, aside from the headaches, probably thanks to your healing, sir. But from what Anise has told me about the drug, it attacks certain brain areas…"

Jack's eyes narrowed dangerously and he could hear Carter suck in a surprised breath.

Janet ploughed on, before either of them could interject something. "I have thoroughly checked and your whole brain is working normally, Sam," she assured her. "Nothing has been damaged or even limited in any way. All your brain areas function the way they did before."

"I could repeat myself, but why is my 2IC then able to let things fly?" Jack prompted, getting slightly impatient.

"Because," Janet answered. "Humans do not use their brain's whole potential. With the uncountable nerve tracts and synapses our brain has nearly incalculable potential. I assume, and by now that's a mere guess, that the drug has altered Sam's brain chemistry and unleashed latent abilities that make her… psychic."

"Janet, that's science-fiction at best!" Sam protested.

Janet shook her head. "I thought so, too, Sam, but you know best that various experts are discussing the possibilities."

"There has never been any evidence or proof of such a theory!" Sam objected instantly.

Jack sighed. "Carter, really… I hate to break that to you, but we've seen stranger things during our journeys, haven't we? That we're confirming a theory even _I_ have heard of before seems almost low-key for me, considering what we normally deal with."

"The Colonel's right," Janet agreed, although the rolling of her eyes told Jack she would definitely have phrased it differently. "And I also have no proof yet. I have to wait for your blood tests and cell probes before I can say anything definite."

Sam nodded, but by her defeated expression and Janet's usual accuracy Jack assumed her 'guess' to be fairly precise. And he also expected Carter knew it as well.

So Carter had gone psychic. First him developing healing abilities and now her. Those aliens had really screwed them over. Jack had no idea what to think of that.

"I… I need to think about that…" Carter voiced his exact thoughts. Jack looked over to her. She sounded overextended and he could really sympathize.

"Okay," Janet agreed. "I'm not going to confine you to the infirmary. But I want you to stay within the SGC, okay? We have no means of knowing what has happened or will happen, and I want to stay on the safe side."

Sam nodded mechanically and stood up. She thanked Janet, but it was more on autopilot, Jack noticed. She seemed absorbed in her thoughts. Then she began to walk out of the infirmary, neither waiting for him nor even acknowledging him in any way. Slightly confused, Jack trailed after her. She marched down the corridor towards the elevator and Jack studied her from behind. She was walking very controlled, the fists at her side clenched, her back noticeably straight. Stopping at her side at the end of the hallway, he waited with her for the elevator to arrive. She didn't say a word. When the elevator stopped at their level and they got in, she immediately pressed the button for Level 19 and silently, they began to ride up.

"You want to work, now?" Jack inquired, when the elevator headed up.

Sam didn't answer. Instead, she stared straight ahead, her eyes far away.

"Caaaarter?" he prodded her, waving a hand up and down in front of her face.

"What?" she suddenly snapped out of it.

"You really want to work right now?" he repeated.

She narrowed small eyes at him, her expression almost hostile. "Is there any reason for me not to work, sir?" she inquired, almost frosty.

He raised his eyebrows at the sudden swing of mood. "No…?" he answered, slightly confused.

"Then I'm going to work," she decided sullenly.

For a moment silence reigned between them. Sam stared straight ahead at the elevator's door and refused to acknowledge him in any way. Jack sighed. So she wasn't going to make this easy for him, was she?

"Just thought… you might want to talk about it," he began, insecure. This was not only new territory for him but also ground he truly didn't want to cross. He didn't really do feelings.

Her head swiveled around and she looked at him surprised. "With _you_ , sir?" she asked stunned.

Okay, so he wasn't winning an award for his counselling skills, but was that any reason to sound so shocked?

"You see anyone else here?" he grouched back, offended by her obvious lack of trust in his communication skills. Then again, O'Neill, what have you really done to disprove her skepticism, his subconscious reminded him.

He knew immediately that his sulking was the wrong way to get to her right now, when her face closed off, her eyes growing distant again. "No, I don't, sir," she answered, all regulation-prompted politeness. "And thank you for your _offer_ , but I don't think that will be necessary."

He hated the cold voice she used. And neither his ego nor his patience dealt well with her harsh rejection. He wanted to help her, so why wouldn't she let him?

"Then talk with Daniel?" he suggested through gritted teeth, trying his best to be patient with her.

"Is that an order, sir?" she asked back.

Something within him snapped. Seeing red for a moment, he reached out and punched the emergency stop button on the elevator's operating panel. The elevator lurched to a stop all of a sudden and taken by surprise, Sam swayed for a second, before she found her footing again. Jack knew he only had a certain amount of time before someone would come looking for them, inquiring if everything was alright due to the sudden halt of the elevator, but he intended to use the time.

"No, _Major_ , that was not an order!" he rounded in on her, stepping well into her personal space. "It was merely a suggestion! It won't do you any good to bottle it all up!"

"You would know, sir, wouldn't you?" she shot back sweetly.

Right now, Jack wanted to reach out and whack her over the head so badly! Logically, he knew what she was doing. She was lashing out blindly. The situation was getting too much for her and her frustration was focusing on the first and only target in close proximity: him. He probably should have given her some time to come clear with all the shit she had to undergo the past weeks before he bothered her, but he hadn't thought that far, had he? Unfortunately, Carter knew exactly which buttons to press with him to get the desired reaction; the reaction she needed right now, and so Jack had to fight to stay patient with her.

"Yes, Carter, I would know!" he growled down at her. "So don't make my mistakes! You don't have to talk with _me_ and you don't have to do it now, but just don't try to ignore it all!"

"Oh?" she answered, staring furiously up at him. She had never backed down from him, no matter what he threw her way. Normally, he really loved that about her. Right now? It only made her difficult.

"And just what exactly do you want me to say?" she all but growled back. "Want me to tell Daniel, I'm slowly turning into a freak? Want me to tell him, my brain is being rotten away by a drug!?"

Her voice rose with every word and her body tensed up. She was finally breaking down. In front of his eyes. And it hurt. It fucking hurt to see her hurt.

Without thinking, Jack reached out for her and pulled her to him. He laid his arms around her and placed his chin on top of her head. She didn't return the embrace, but she leaned into it.

"Carter, you're no freak," he contradicted, frowning. How she'd even come to that conclusion was beyond him.

"And how would you call that?" she asked dejected. "I'm changing, sir. I'm turning into a monster…"

Jack snorted. "Carter, going psychic won't make you a monster."

"What would you call it, sir?" she shot back.

He pursed his lips. "Special. It's making you special."

She grunted displeased. "I don't want to be _special!_ "

He chuckled, while he pressed his nose into her hair, inhaling her scent. "Believe it or not, Carter, you _are_ already special. Just in another kind. So, like it or not, you turning psychic won't change that much. It won't even change you much."

"You can't know that, sir," she opposed. "Who knows what I'll turn into?"

"Nothing you haven't been before," he said. "You'll still be Carter."

"You can't know that, sir!" she repeated.

"Yes, I do," he contradicted.

"How?" she wanted to know.

"I'm changing, too," he simply answered.

She inhaled shakily and then turned her head into his chest. "I'm sorry, sir," she whispered. "I shouldn't have forgotten what you have to go through."

"Carter, I didn't say it so you would pity me," he admonished. "I just wanted to show you, you aren't alone in this."

He took a quick breath and then continued: "Do you feel like I've changed?"

She thought it through for a moment. "Essentially, no."

"See?" he murmured. "And you won't, too."

"What if it attacks my brain?" she suddenly blurted out.

"Attack your brain?", he echoed surprised.

"Janet said that is what the drug does. It destroys certain brain areas…"

Tentatively, she reached up and Jack felt her hand clutch onto his BDU jacket. He felt the slight tremble that racked her limb and suddenly he understood. She was scared. When he had come to after their capture, his body had been through its alterations and he'd been presented with the fait accompli. He had had no chance whatsoever to influence it, but at least he didn't have to go through the worry of what could become of him. Janet had already taken care of all possible side effects and his healing abilities had ensured he came out of it the best way possible and with the least changes possible. But Carter? She was just at the beginning. She had no idea what could still happen or what could become of her.

"Janet also said that wouldn't happen anymore, didn't she?" he soothed. "She's monitoring your brain and so far _nothing_ has changed."

"But what if–?" she began.

"Carter, it's not happening!" he interrupted. "So there's no need to be afraid of it!"

"I just… I just can't lose my mind!" she admitted.

"Why?" he inquired, curious.

She sighed. "Because it is all I have. My intellect is all I've ever been good in…"

He grunted irked. "That's bullshit, Carter!" he scolded. "You have so much more than just a brain! You're a damn good soldier! You have good combat and diplomatic skills, you're a good tactician and you have good leading qualities. You're also good with technology and computers. And you don't need to be a genius to be better than anyone else, even with average knowledge you'd top most of the people working here!"

She actually giggled at that and for once, Jack didn't mind. "Sir, you're exaggerating."

"Just trying to make a point," he smiled back.

"Thank you," she said honestly. "I really feel better now."

And then she laughed. "Guess talking really helps!"

"See?" he agreed. "We should do that more often."

"Yes, sir," she confirmed. But then she grew serious again. "Still… It won't ever be like before, will it?" she asked.

He knew immediately what she was talking about. "Probably not."

"It will take some… getting used to," she mused.

"Most likely," he agreed. "But whatever happens, Carter, I want you to know this: we're in this together. You're not alone."

"Yes, sir," she murmured. "Thank you."

"We'll get through this," he assured her.

"Together," she declared.

"Together," he agreed.

Suddenly, the base's PA system sounded out, ricocheting through the elevator's intercom: " _Colonel O'Neill to General Hammond's office!_ "

"Oh, for cryin' out loud!" Jack cursed heatedly. Why now? They had been on a good way! And they were far from done!

But before Jack could react, the damage was done already. Sam stepped back from him. She was smiling at him again, at least, but he already missed the feeling of her in his arms. Then again, they probably shouldn't stand like that in a public elevator with video surveillance.

"Go, sir," she said understanding.

He narrowed his eyes, searching her face for any indication she might still need him.

"I'm okay," she assured him.

"Really?" he prompted her, suspicious.

"I will be," she corrected. "I'll need a bit time to think everything through."

He released the emergency stop button and the elevator continued its journey. Only now Jack noticed slightly astonished that nobody had tried to contact them during their unexpected stop. Maybe Siler had finally enough of his tampering with the elevator's electronics and had decided to teach him a lesson? Jack almost snorted at that thought. If that was the case, then the technician had failed. Although Siler had pleaded with him often enough and General Hammond had even admonished him for it before, Jack would still stop the elevator whenever he felt like it. It was just a good place to have an undisturbed conversation (wasn't like Daniel and his impeccable timing could plough in there, hah!).

The elevator halted at Level 19 and Carter stepped out, a grateful smile still playing upon her lips. He was strangely relieved she wasn't angry with him anymore.

"Don't overdo it, Major!" Jack ordered, mock-stern, while following her with his eyes. "Don't think you can bury yourself in work for days now! You're still recovering, which means you need to sleep regularly! Don't even think of 'accidentally' forgetting that! I'll come and get you tonight!"

She turned and looked at him, just before the elevator's doors closed. "Yes, sir," she said, grinning. "I will be waiting, sir."


	18. Warning

_Again, thank you all so much for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Author's note:**_ _So, a little note on the last chapter: I wanted to show a more emotional side of Jack and Sam, the one I strongly believe they have but aren't really showing, so it was a bit hard to get it written. Just like a few of you commented in your reviews, I also think Sam defines herself a lot through her work and the 'genius' status she's gained in it. So thinking that she could lose that, she would get naturally get frightened and frustrated to the eventual point of anger. What actually made the chapter hard to write was Jack's reaction to it. I think his offer to help was toeing a fine line while trying to stay in character with him, but I hope I managed. And, as you will hopefully see in the future chapters, his reaction – and thus the last chapter – was a really important one that the story couldn't do without._

 _So, enough random rambling and back to the important stuff…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Eighteen – Warning_

"Sir?" Jack announced himself, knocking on General Hammond's office door.

The General looked up from whatever document he had been working on. Standing in the door frame, Jack wondered how the man could actually stand that much paperwork. Jack detested every single sheet on his desk already and that wasn't as flooded as the General's.

The General looked at the Colonel and then waved him in. When Jack entered and closed the door behind him, the General motioned towards the chair standing in front of his large desk.

"Jack. Take a seat."

Jack did so, albeit skeptically. First name basis. That didn't bode well. Either he was in deep shit and the General wanted to talk to him off the record or this was a friendly conversation. And neither of the two options was something Jack was looking forward to. But going by his current record and his tendency to not really follow orders in the intended way, Jack was way more familiar with the first possibility than the latter.

"Don't look at me like that, son," the General chuckled. "You're not here for an interrogation."

"Then why am I here, sir?" Jack asked.

The General stacked his papers in a folder marked classified – as all folders passing the SGC were – and then tossed it into his out-tray. With a sigh, he leaned back into the heavy leather chair, his eyes piercing into the Colonel.

"I just wanted to know, how you're doing," the General admitted.

"Me?" the Colonel inquired with a raised brow.

"You and Major Carter," the General clarified.

"Why not ask her herself?" Jack asked back carefully.

"You are her Commanding Officer. You know about her state," the General stated.

Jack narrowed his eyes, trying to understand what the General was getting at. He knew that General Hammond and Carter were close, even if the General never let it on. He always treated Carter like the rest, but actually General Hammond and Carter's dad were good friends and the General had been close to the whole Carter family, having seen Sam grow up. It was understandable he'd be worried. And Jack was no fool. Even though the General lacked the time to come visit them every so often, he had come to see them during their recovery in regular time intervals. Jack also knew that Fraiser was keeping him updated almost better than Jack himself and being used to interrogation, Jack had noticed the subtle questioning from the other man during their meetings when Jack had been catching up on the events that had happened during his absence.

And then Jack understood. The General was worried. Of course, he was. Nobody could really say what was happening to them. But he tried to treat it as trivial as possible. He probably didn't want to draw any unnecessary attention to their states and so he went the usual way he would when an SG team member was hurt: he kept himself updated by the CMO and the Commanding Officer.

Jack allowed a small smile to pass over his lips. The General really did his best to not favorite any man or woman under his command, but Jack could see the worry in the other man's eyes.

"Carter's doing…" Jack began, but then trailed off fishing for the right word. 'Fine' obviously wasn't it. "She's coping," he finally admitted. "It's a lot for her and she's scared of the side effects the drugs could have on her."

The General nodded. "I heard from Doctor Fraiser. She seems to develop abilities similar to those Cassandra displayed."

Jack tilted his head noncommittal. "Well, we don't really know what she can do, we've only seen her levitate a chess knight. And she wasn't even aware she was doing it."

"Did she show any other… abilities?" the General inquired, all professional.

"So far? No," Jack answered.

"Then maybe it was a one-time-thing?" General Hammond suggested.

Jack shrugged. "I'm not Fraiser. You'd have to ask her. But as far as I know, she's still waiting for some lab results."

"I know," the General agreed. "I was just… _hoping_."

Jack's eyes narrowed. "With all due respect, sir, but Carter having _any_ abilities will not change anything!"

The General smiled in understanding. "I know what you mean, Jack, and I agree," he said. "But the further her abilities grow, the more attention she will get. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

Jack bit down hard on his teeth. Shit, he hadn't thought of that, yet!

"NID, sir?", he asked sharply.

The General looked back mildly, not at all perturbed by the Colonel's choice of voice. "NID, Area 51, the Pentagon… There'd surely be a lot of people _interested_ in such abilities," he explained.

"Then what about me?" Jack asked next.

"Oh, don't worry, son, I'm sure your healing abilities would have a few scientists have a heart attack from excitement," the General assured him.

"Then how come the NID isn't already knocking on our doors?" Jack inquired suspiciously.

The General smiled conspiratorial. "Because word's not gotten out yet that there _is_ anything happening to you."

Jack raised his brows astonished. "You've not reported us, sir?"

"No, Jack, I have not."

"Excuse me, sir, but why the hell not?"

The General chuckled soundlessly. "Because I want to see, what or if anything happens at all, before I throw any of you at their mercy," he answered.

Well, with Carter understandable, but…

"Sir, there are definite changes to me. Irreversible changes, to be exact," Jack pointed out.

"Yes," the General agreed. "And I probably will have to report them some time. I just want to give you a head start."

"A head start?" Jack echoed perplexed.

"If those so-called scientists need to get their hands on any of my men, then I want them to be able to control whatever ability they have," the General said. "You, and _only_ you, should decide what you want to show others and what not. I simply want you to be prepared."

Which also explained the warning, Jack mused. "Thank you, sir. We will be," he decided.

Hell, there was no way he would let the NID or whoever else get their filthy hands on Carter! Okay, so they would set their sights on him as well, but as usual, Jack didn't care that much about his own fate. And, given, his background and his experiences coupled with his higher rank gave him opportunities Carter herself had not. So instead of worrying about the very palpable danger he could be in, Jack's protective streak concentrated on the threat they could pose to his 2IC.

Silence settled between them, while Jack worked through everything in his head. How long could General Hammond really buy them time? So far only those directly involved knew what was happening. That included the General, SG-1, the S&R teams: SG-3, SG-8, SG-15 and SG-21, Doctor Fraiser and the medical personnel, which he was pretty sure now had been restricted to a few trustworthy nurses, and the Tok'ra. So far nobody was involved Jack wouldn't trust to stay silent as long as the General wanted it. They could get away with it, for now…

The PA system cut through his thoughts, announcing: " _Major Carter to the control room!_ "

Jack noticed, but dismissed it absentmindedly. It wasn't unusual for his 2IC to get called there to fix whatever technology was currently acting up. Turning back to the General, Jack noticed the man's patient gaze studying him.

"Thank you for the warning," he said earnestly.

The General nodded. "Of course," he said. "I don't want to lose two of my best men and most certainly not to some scientists so they can make guinea pigs out of them!"

An involuntary shudder ran down Jack's back. No, he would certainly not let anyone make a lab rat out of him anymore, if he could help it!

"How long do we have, sir?" Jack asked.

The General tapped a finger on his chair's armrest absentmindedly. "For now all not involved only know that you and Major Carter are recovering from your capture. And as long as Doctor Fraiser is still doing tests and examinations, nothing is set into stone for me, so I won't report anything."

Jack was relieved. So they had at least until Fraiser had determined what was wrong with Carter. The flies wouldn't gather around them, until he would have Carter stabilized and prepared. As he had promised her, they were in this together and he would be by her side. And he fully intended to stay by that promise.

"I know, you will make the best out of that head start, Colonel," the General said and once again, Jack was surprised at the trust the other man had in him. Jack knew that his skills were appreciated in the Air Force, but he also knew that most higher-ups weren't fond of having to deal with him. He was difficult and that was on a good day. But General Hammond had never had a problem dealing with him. From the beginning, he had taken Jack as he was and while he sometimes had his differences with his 2IC, he'd always shown the honest respect and the sincere trust he had in him. And this made Jack follow the man's orders more willingly than with former superior officers.

Jack nodded. "Is that all, sir?"

"For now, yes."

Jack stood up and walked towards the office's door. His brain was already deducing what to make out of the information he'd gotten. In any case, he had to talk to Carter. Let her know. Wasn't she in the control room right now? He could go down, wait for her to finish, drag her to the commissary for a late lunch and then accompany her to her quarters to talk. Sounded like a plan.

"Oh, and Jack?" the General said from behind him.

Jack turned around once more. "Yes, sir?"

The General looked down on another document he'd opened, his eyes scanning the contents quickly. "If you ever feel the need to talk, about anything, you can come to me."

Jack blinked at him, puzzled what that had to mean. "Sir?" he prompted confused.

The General dismissed him with a wave. "I just wanted you to know," he said.

"Yes, sir," he said again. Somehow he had the feeling that this did not have much to do with what they had been talking about before…

Jack had merely done a step forward, when alarms suddenly rang out around him. From the familiar blaring he knew the Stargate had been activated. Startled, Jack waited for Harriman's voice to announce what had happened, but it never came.

"Is any team due to return, sir?" Jack asked back over his shoulder.

The General had already rounded his desk and was coming towards him, telling Jack that no, this was not a scheduled activation. Shit, he cursed inwardly, while jogging towards the stairs in the briefing room just ahead of the General. What was it now?

Jack stormed down the stairs, taking two at a time. When the control room came into sight, he halted abruptly on the stairs, his eyes scanning the unexpected picture in front of him. Oh, shit, shit, shit!

Jack jumped over the railing to forego the last steps and silently thanked his healed knees when they absorbed the shock of his fall effortlessly. Chief Master Sergeant Harriman sat slumped forwards in his seat, his head lying on the controlling computers in front of him. He was obviously unconscious. As were the other technicians that lay on the ground. Two SF's had collapsed at the room's entrances, but as far as Jack could see, nobody seemed seriously hurt. Jack stormed to the thick observation window just when the General arrived in the control room, demanding to know: "What the hell happened here?"

Jack halted in front of the controlling computers. With one hand checking Harriman's vitals, his eyes went towards the Stargate down below in the 'Gate room where a calmly shimmering blue event horizon greeted him, and then switched to the Stargate's controlling computers to see what was going on.

In the background he heard General Hammond pick up the phone attached to the wall and call for medical and security teams.

Jack's eyes swiveled fast over the data the Stargate's controlling computers displayed while his head deduced what it meant. He quickly realized that, actually, he wasn't looking at an unscheduled off-world activation. The alarms had activated because someone from _within the SGC_ had engaged a wormhole without permission!

"Sir! We have an outgoing wormhole!" Jack yelled back over his shoulder to inform the General.

"Close the iris, Colonel!" General Hammond ordered in response.

"Yes, sir!" Jack confirmed the order and then slammed his hand down on the palm scanner. The scanner blinked and then changed to green, indicating his palm had been accepted. The iris slid close over the event horizon and soon after, Jack saw the wormhole disengage.

Loud footsteps alerted him to the arrival of the nurses and Jack stepped aside to make room. Fraiser stormed into the room and began yelling orders, immediately taking control of the situation.

Jack retreated, coming to stand by the General's side. Slowly, the Colonel raked his eyes over the chaos reigning in the room. His eyes narrowed. Hadn't Carter been here, too? He didn't see her anywhere. Where was she?

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Sam looked up, when the PA system broadcasted: " _Major Carter to the control room!_ "

Damn, she had just started on the device from PJ8-923 SG-10 had recently brought back! Still, she left her lab and headed for the control room. Jogging up the stairs to the control room only minutes later, she already spotted Chief Master Sergeant Harriman waiting for her.

"Sergeant? What's wrong?" she inquired the moment she slowed down next to him.

The Sergeant motioned towards the iris' palm scanner that flashed a brilliant red. "The scanner suddenly started acting up," he reported.

Sam examined the scanner with trained eyes. She had developed the mechanism and it only turned red when a palm was pressed down on it that wasn't registered in the system. It meant access denied.

"Who touched the scanner?" she asked.

The Sergeant looked at her confused. "Nobody," he said.

Sam gnawed on her lip, her brain already spitting ideas at her. "Then it has to be a malfunction," she said. "I have to–"

She didn't get to end the sentence. A sudden jolt of energy surged through her body. Sam exhaled surprised, her head trying to come up with an explanation, what had happened, but it didn't have the time. Her body grew heavy immediately and she felt her knee give out under her. _A zat_ , experience told her when she finally recognized the feeling, but it was too late. She fell, her body hitting the ground hard but she didn't feel it anymore. She was unconscious, before she touched the concrete beneath her.


	19. Understanding

_As usual, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Author's note:**_ _So, as requested, a faster update. This chapter should hopefully shed some light into what's happened and is going to happen next. Although I think a few of you already suspect what's going on…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Nineteen – Understanding_

Jack scowled down the briefing table hatefully. And while he didn't mean anyone in particular, he saw quite a few people avert their eyes uncomfortably. Daniel, who was standing next to him as if glued to the spot, laid a reassuring hand on his shoulder but for once it didn't have any effect. Jack's mood was bordering on dangerous, only a hairsbreadth away from snapping completely, whatever Daniel might try to calm him.

They hadn't found Carter. As soon as he'd been free to leave the control room, Jack had done a quick search for her, going to her quarters, his, her lab, the commissary, the infirmary, the gym. She'd been nowhere.

Now Teal'c was leading a base-wide search, while General Hammond and he were going through all sections to see if there was anyone else missing. The leaders of all SG units currently assembled on base were present, as well as Siler for the technicians, Felger and Lee for the scientists and Doctor MacKenzie for the infirmary. Together they were working through the list of personnel to see who was present, who had gone home already, who was on vacation or sick leave, who was stationed in the infirmary – as a patient as well as a guard – and who was off-world. While the General had to be informed in all these cases, he certainly couldn't keep track over all personnel of such a large base, so normally all heads of sections had to know. For the SG teams this meant their unit leaders. Jack and the General knew which units were on off-world missions and which were on downtime due to whatever reason, but they certainly didn't know who of the men on-world were currently at the base. But the team leaders knew. Normally, Carter would be the one in charge of all the scientists, but since she wasn't present, Lee and Felger tried to work through the lists, trying to find out, who should be on base and who not. Daniel occasionally helped them, but most of the time he stuck to Jack. Fraiser would be the one to ask anything concerning the infirmary, but right now she was on duty, treating the injured they had found in the control room, so MacKenzie had to stand in for her and now saw himself confronted with similar problems as Lee and Felger.

"Well, sir…" Siler finally said, glancing towards General Hammond. "As far as we can say from the data we have, everyone is where they should be."

"Aside from Carter," Jack threw in icily.

Daniel shifted from the harsh tone, but surprisingly, Siler took it in stride. "With the exception of Major Carter," he amended.

In this exact moment, Teal'c entered the briefing room, the SF's he'd taken with him trailing behind him.

"T," Jack said, a sudden feeling of nervousness settling in his stomach.

Teal'c looked on stoically. "I am sorry, O'Neill, but we were unable to locate Major Carter," he reported.

Damn it all, Jack cursed inwardly. Outwardly, his eyes narrowed and he bit down hard on his back teeth, which he knew would make him look downright intimidating. He didn't care, however.

"Well, she certainly can't have vanished into thin air," General Hammond said reasonably. "She has to be somewhere."

Jack feared it wasn't that easy. If anywhere, Carter should be here, with him. And if she had any possibility, she would be here, with him. She would have heard the alarms and come running to the control room.

But she wasn't here.

Which made Jack fear for the worst.

"Siler, go through the surveillance tapes," Jack ordered. "See, if you can find anything. Start with the control room, she was there last."

Siler nodded sharply and then went down into the control room to access the computers.

Silence settled in the room, while Siler worked. General Hammond was speaking with Teal'c about the search but all others tried their best to avoid Jack's burning gaze.

Quite a lot exhaled relieved, when Siler reappeared at the stairs, calling for Jack. "Colonel O'Neill?"

Jack immediately stormed off, Daniel on his heels. He imagined Teal'c and General Hammond weren't that far behind, either.

"Did you find something?" Jack inquired, while he stomped down the stairs.

"It wasn't actually that hard, sir," Siler admitted.

The Tech Sergeant motioned towards a monitor that showed a rewind from the surveillance tapes. Jack and Daniel stared at the small monitor, but Siler waited for General Hammond and Teal'c to arrive before he started the tape. Jack watched with narrowed eyes. Carter was shown on the tape, jogging up the stairs of the control room. He remembered she'd been paged by Harriman, but he hadn't really paid much attention to it then. The Carter on the screen went over to Harriman and began speaking with him. The Chief Master Sergeant motioned towards the iris' palm scanner, apparently explaining something. Sam nodded to his words and then answered something, when suddenly a flash appeared out of nowhere! Jack recognized it immediately. A zat.

In stunned silence they all watched the surge of energy apparently coming out of nowhere hit Carter. She staggered and then collapsed in the middle of the control room. Jack saw Harriman jump up, saw him reach out to her, but then he was hit by another flash and fell back into his chair, unconscious. With rapid fire one after the other went down in the control room: first the SF's by the door, then the rest of the technicians present. Nobody had even the slightest chance to react in time or alert the rest of the base. Nobody even _saw_ what was coming for them, the attacks seemed to come from everywhere at once. And as much as Jack tried, he couldn't see an attacker.

"Um… is it my eyes or does anybody else don't see an attacker?" Daniel asked from behind Jack.

"Your eyes are accurate, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c agreed.

Jack watched the video tape play on. On the screen something blinked on the controlling computers and then the Stargate began spinning. Jack understood. Someone had activated the dialing program. The Stargate was dialing out. And naturally, only a few seconds later the wormhole engaged, kawooshing to life on a corner of the video tape.

But what he saw then, took all air from Jack. On screen, Carter seemed to lift up into the air and then floated out of the control room. Jack surged forwards, not believing his eyes. Carter glided out of their sight.

"Can we follow her?" Jack pressed Siler.

"Of course, sir," he said and then switched to the records of another camera.

Jack watched Carter's way through the hallway and then into the 'Gate room, while Siler switched from camera to camera. Jack's mouth went dry, while he watched Carter's slumped form float up the ramp and then disappear into the engaged wormhole. Only about a minute later he saw the iris' shield slide close over the wormhole and he knew it had been him who'd activated it. A minute! He'd been a minute too late. One minute earlier and he could have…!

"Somebody tell me what the hell has happened there!" Jack demanded furious, his voice a cold whisper. But nobody had an answer for him.

"Daniel!" the Colonel prompted. Since Carter wasn't here to explain it to him, SG-1's other scientist had to do the honors.

"Well, the best I can come up with is an invisible attacker," Daniel said, apparently unfazed by Jack's unjustified anger.

"An invisible attacker?" Jack echoed, turning back to look at the archaeologist. And he wasn't the only one. Teal'c, Siler and General Hammond had their eyes trained on him as well. In the background, Jack saw Colonels Reynold and Dixon hover, seemingly waiting for further orders, and Ferretti and Pierce were also staying close by, their wary eyes following his movements, worry etched into their features.

"Like the Reetou?" Jack asked.

"I do not believe this approach suits the Reetou's usual course of action," Teal'c interjected.

"Yeah, what would they gain from abducting Sam?" Daniel agreed.

"What would anyone gain from abducting Major Carter?" Teal'c asked back.

Jack bit down on his lower lip, tasting blood. Apart from her intimate knowledge of the SGC? Her identification codes for the iris, her insider knowledge of Earth's defenses, the X-series, Earth's military… If anyone, Carter was the perfect choice for abduction. She had sensible knowledge of almost all important defense systems. She had been part of nearly all projects connected in whatever form to the Stargate Program and she had been engineering all vital parts of the SGC, the X-series and a few defense systems of their allies like the Tok'ra and the Asgard as well. Jack almost groaned out loud. He really should have kept a closer eye on her!

"Sir, we need to contact our allies," Jack said towards General Hammond, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"I agree," the General said, knowing exactly what he meant, and immediately set Siler to the task, since Harriman was still disabled.

"Why?" Daniel asked puzzled, but Jack didn't take the time to explain it to him.

"I still believe it highly unlikely for the Reetou to have taken Major Carter," Teal'c stated stoically.

For a moment, Jack was stumped why the Jaffa insisted on that, but then he perked up. "You have another idea," he concluded.

"Indeed," Teal'c confirmed.

"Who?" Jack pressed impatiently.

Teal'c looked at him unwavering. "The Goa'uld Nirrti has the ability to make herself invisible," he informed them.

"Nirrti?" Jack echoed. He remembered the slimy weasel of a Goa'uld. He hadn't liked her on their first encounter and apparently, he'd been right.

"Indeed," Teal'c repeated.

Daniel winced suddenly. And Jack just knew this were further bad news. "What?" he snapped enraged.

"Um… we've just killed off Cronus, so…" the archaeologist began, only to trail off at Jack's enraged sight.

"So Nirrti who was imprisoned under him would have been set free," General Hammond ended it for him.

Jack raked his hands through his hair infuriated. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!

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Sam awoke with a start. Her head pounded with the familiar feeling she connected with a zat hit.

Blinking hard, she pried her eyes open. The pictures blurred in front of her eyes. Groaning quietly, Sam laid her head back against something cool. She tried shifting, but couldn't. She curled her fingers into fists and tried to lift her hands, but something pressed them down. Panicking, Sam realized she was being restrained. Again. Her eyes shot open and now she could clearly see bonds placed around her wrists, arms, thighs and ankles. Sam twisted and turned, but although her torso was free, she couldn't move that much. Again! She'd been taken prisoner again!

Sam looked around, but there was no one there but her. No SG-1, no Colonel O'Neill. She was alone.

No way! Not again! Sam pulled at her arms with all her might, the bonds cutting into her flesh. Blood began trailing down her wrists, but she didn't care. She concentrated with all her mind on the ropes, _willing_ them to loosen up. She would not again end up as a lab rat! She had barely survived the last time! No way was she going through this again!

The bonds didn't give an inch. Gritting her teeth against the pain that shot through her abused arms, Sam twisted and turned her arms, trying to wriggle from the restraints. Two words shot through her frantic mind like a mantra: not again, not again, not again, _not again!_

Finally, her energy left her and she fell back against the flat surface she was held against. Where was she? What had happened? Sam remembered having been called to the control room and she remembered having been shot with a zat. But then nothing. Well, obviously someone had abducted her and brought her… where?

She looked around. The room she was held in was sparsely lit, small and obviously alien. Markings in an unknown language lined the walls, but aside from that it was practically bare. Sam had never been that good with languages, that was usually Daniel's job (even the Colonel could speak more languages than she could), so it could be anything from Goa'uld to Ancient.

Since there was nothing more about the room, Sam took stock of herself. She was bound to something like a chair. Her legs were outstretched but she was clearly sitting up. And aside from the injuries she'd just inflicted on herself, she seemed fine.

Suddenly, one of the walls opened. Sam's head shot around to what obviously was no wall but a hidden door. A tall, slender figure stepped through and at one of their movements, more lights lit up. Sam immediately recognized the woman stepping up to her.

"Nirrti!" she called out accusingly.

" _Major Carter,_ " the Goa'uld greeted amused.

Well, that at least explained, _who_ had taken her, Sam mused dejectedly.

The Goa'uld stepped up to her and examined her injured arms with a detached gaze. " _It seems you are awake for some time already,_ " she observed objective. " _Apparently a zat hit doesn't keep you down as long anymore as it does other humans. Very interesting._ "

Oh yes, interesting indeed, Sam grumbled inwardly. The Goa'uld's neutral glance gazing her up and down made her instantly feel like a lab rat once more. Sam fought against the images of another lab rushing into her mind where she'd been restricted and experimented on. She had enough of it!

"What do you want?" she asked, trying to sound as haughty as possible. No way was she bowing down to a Goa'uld!

Nirrti smiled in a disconcerting way. " _Answers, Major Carter,_ " she answered simply.

Sam gritted her teeth determinedly, her face setting into a hard expression. "I won't tell you anything!" she stated.

Calmly, Nirrti looked at her, before she began to round her, circling her as if she were an exhibit. " _You underestimate me, Major Carter_ ," she said, almost amused. " _I don't_ need _you to tell me anything to find out whatever I want._ "

Dread settled in Sam's stomach. Nirrti was a scary opponent. Not only did she have a goal and apparently not much scruple of using whatever means necessary to get there, just like all Goa'uld she had the possibilities of making Sam go through unimaginable pain _and_ she had vast knowledge of the human body, so she could get very _creative_ with Sam. But on the outside, Sam gave nothing away. She wouldn't go down without a fight, whatever this snake might try!

Sam was acutely aware that she had knowledge of many, _many_ sensitive topics and that even just a part of it could give the Goa'uld _the_ advantage over the Tau'ri. She had been part of almost all things connected to the Stargate, including the iris, the defense systems and the X-series projects. She knew Earth's defenses by heart and she had insider knowledge of all their military organizations. She had also been consulted by alien races like the Tok'ra and the Asgard and helped them develop certain defense systems. A Goa'uld could gain much knowledge from her.

But Sam also knew best what was all at stake. Her thoughts travelled back to the SGC, picturing her friends and family. She imagined General Hammond – Uncle George – standing in the control room behind Chief Master Sergeant Harriman with Siler working close by, a picture she'd been presented with uncountable times, when they'd been returning from off-world missions. She imagined the innumerable scientists she was friends with bustling through their labs, making jokes in the hallways only the geeks would understand. She imagined countless faces of her fellow military officers in the commissary, waving at her in a greeting, before congratulating her on another impossible task she'd achieved. She imagined her dad stepping through the Stargate, coming from another undercover mission he'd done for the Tok'ra. She pictured Daniel strolling into her lab, various folders in one hand, a mug of coffee in the other, asking her for help. She saw Teal'c sit down next to her in the briefing room, smiling at her in greeting, before he shot an intimidating gaze at whatever scientist was brave enough to try for the chair on her other side, which would usually be the Colonel's seat. And finally, she pictured the Colonel standing next to her in front of the Stargate's ramp, routinely strapping his weapons to his lean frame and pulling his cap down over his eyes, before he turned, his dark eyes studying her in a familiar, telltale way, a small, secret smile grazing his lips he usually reserved for her.

Resolve took over. There was no fucking way in hell Sam would give any information over to this Goa'uld! She would protect her friends! She would defend her family, even if this was the last thing she would do!

Anger surged through her and suddenly, Sam felt an overwhelming power flow through her body. She didn't resist it. Holding onto the thoughts of her family and friends, Sam welcomed the power and channeled it through her body. Power unlike anything she'd ever felt before flooded her limbs. Again, Sam pulled. With all her might, she pulled on her arms and legs, against the tight hold the ropes had on her. The bonds creaked and then, astonishingly, ripped.

Surprised, Nirrti stepped back.

Sam rose from the chair she'd been bound on and glowered at the Goa'uld.

" _Marvelous,_ " the Goa'uld commented. She had the guts to sound thrilled.

Sam did a step forwards, aiming for the door. The Goa'uld raised her hand, revealing a hand device.

" _You will not flee,_ " Nirrti commanded.

"I'm not your Jaffa! I don't take orders from you!" Sam shot back and just for good measure, did another step.

The hand device flashed and before she could understand, Sam felt energy slam into her body, throwing her backwards, until she crashed into the chair. Her head rang and pain tingled through her body. For a moment, she had to orientate herself.

Grunting she came back to her feet, shaking her head to clear it.

" _That was not an order, Major Carter. It was a statement,_ " Nirrti clarified arrogantly.

Sam swayed and had to reach a hand out to the chair behind her to stabilize herself. Still, she held onto consciousness and the unfamiliar power that coursed through her with all her willpower, theorizing that this would probably be the only chance at escape she'd get. Nirrti would not make the same mistake twice. Next time, she would bind her up tightly enough so that even the thought of escape would be ridiculous.

"We'll see about that!" Sam challenged.

Nirrti snorted. " _You wield amazing power, Major Carter_ ," she said, almost longingly. " _But you have no idea how to use it. What a waste!_ "

"Not your problem," Sam grunted.

But apparently Nirrti was done with letting her hurl insults at her. The Goa'uld raised her hand again, the device attached to it glowing forebodingly. Sam raised her arms in an automatic defense position. She didn't want to get hit once more! With the force the Goa'uld used on her it was likely it would do her in!

To her surprise however, Sam only felt the energy wash over her. She felt it pass her, almost like a gust of wind sweeping over her skin, but it didn't hurt her!

Nirrti looked at her affronted and then upped the strength quite a bit. Sam felt like being hit with a brick wall, but astonishingly, she managed to fight it back! Almost like a shield, her powers were surrounding her, protecting her from the energy her enemy hurled at her.

Then, lastly, Nirrti lowered her device. Almost immediately, Sam felt her own energy recede, leaving her feeling drained and beaten. She swayed and her knees buckled, but she managed to stay on her feet, even if barely.

" _Astonishing,_ " Nirrti commented. " _Even if you really have_ no _control over it._ "

"Oh, I think, I'm doing alright," Sam shot back, breathless. Maybe, if she got the Goa'uld talking long enough, she could recover enough to try an attack…?

Sam wrecked her brain, trying to come with a plan to get the Goa'uld talking. "How did you get into the base?" she asked the first thing that came to her mind. It even was a good question. If she'd somehow managed to get out of this, it would be an important information.

Nirrti smirked at her complacently. " _I have powers you can't even imagine,_ " she answered haughtily.

Sam narrowed her eyes on her, pulling up every information on Nirrti she had from Teal'c. "A Goa'uld cloaking device," she said, suddenly understanding. Nirrti didn't say anything to that, but Sam was sure, she was right about this.

Sam gritted her teeth. "So I assume you've come with one of our teams through the Stargate?" she inquired.

" _Indeed,_ " Nirrti said amused. " _I believe it was even your team that broke into my laboratory and disturbed my experiments, so I decided to follow them to your base. Your team mates had a very… enticing conversation._ "

Sam understood immediately. Daniel and Teal'c! When they had gone back to Hanka to search for a cure for Cassie, they'd unknowingly stumbled upon an invisible Nirrti, when they had found her lab! Sam could see instantly, what could have intrigued Nirrti. Daniel and Teal'c had obviously talked about Cassie and her state. For Nirrti, it must have been a surprise to learn that Hanka's lone survivor, Cassandra Fraiser, was still alive despite the bomb she'd placed in the young girl. And moreover that the young woman was showing traits of the Hok'tar Nirrti was so frantically working towards.

So Nirrti had apparently trailed SG-1 back to the SGC to see for herself what had happened to Cassie. Sam tilted her head to the side, studying the Goa'uld. Why had Nirrti not tried to take Cassie? If she'd been there the whole time, invisible even, then she would have had enough opportunities. Yes, Cassie had been placed in an isolation room with guards at the doors, and yes, there'd constantly been someone with her, either Sam, Janet, Daniel, Teal'c or the Colonel, but still, that would have only hindered Nirrti from getting Cassie to the Stargate. She could have easily tried to examine Cassie. But from what Sam knew by now, the Goa'uld hadn't even made an attempt. Why not? Sam tried to see, what Nirrti could have seen. What could have diverted her attention away from Cassie?

Suddenly, Sam understood. The Colonel healing Cassie! Of course. What could be more interesting to Nirrti than a human who was assuredly handling superhuman powers? Superhuman powers Nirrti herself was trying to achieve.

"The Colonel…!" Sam whispered out loud without noticing. Nirrti would surely have been studying him closely to see, what he was capable of.

" _I admit, he has unusual potential,_ " Nirrti said, but she didn't sound all that intrigued.

Immediately, Sam's brain began to sift through the new information. The Colonel had the most power of them all, so why hadn't Nirrti captured him? Not that Sam wanted him to have to go through what she was subjected to, but he was the most logical choice. Or not? Nirrti was a Goa'uld. She was capable of healing herself, so the Colonel's healing powers weren't all that important to her. But did she have an idea what he could do apart from that? Did she know how he'd changed after their imprisonment? Sam thought it through but she couldn't remember an occasion during the time Nirrti had hid in the SGC where the Colonel could have displayed another ability than his healing powers. Maybe Nirrti wasn't aware.

And then another thought dawned on Sam. What had seen Nirrti apart from the Colonel's healing abilities in that moment in Cassie's isolation room? Her little display with the chess knight! She herself had shown much the same abilities Cassie had been capable of until the Colonel had healed her! So that was what had had Nirrti intrigued! That was why the Goa'uld had chosen to take her! Nirrti didn't want any information from her concerning the SGC or any defense systems whatsoever! Nirrti had declared Sam _herself_ her new experiment, trying to get the information out of her body how she could create a Hok'tar!

Now Sam felt another kind of fear sink into her stomach like a rock. What if Nirrti would really somehow manage to get that information from her? It was unimaginable what could become of the Goa'uld! Would Sam be the one to finally give them the abilities to defeat the Tau'ri? Would she be the one to spell doom for all humans and the Jaffa?

Determined, Sam pushed away the fear. No way in hell!

"You won't get anything from me!" she spat heatedly at the Goa'uld.

Nirrti chuckled. " _Major Carter, you do not have any possibility to hinder me,_ " she said confidently.

"I won't help you in any way!" Sam growled.

" _You have no other choice,_ " Nirrti contradicted sweetly. " _You_ will _do as I say._ "

"Go to hell!" Sam snarled furious.

Nirrti's hand shot up and this time, totally taken by surprise, Sam was just a second too late. She tried to activate the power that had allowed her to defy the former System Lord before, but the Goa'uld was faster than her. And this time, Nirrti certainly did not hold anything back. Sam was bowled over by the unexpected strength of the energy, thrown back with force. She knocked over the chair and was then flung against the wall. Her head crashed into the unyielding wall and in an automatic reaction, she wanted to scream out, but the impact pressed all air out of her lungs, keeping her gasping for oxygen instead. The force of the hand device pressed her into the wall, forming cracks beneath her, where her body was pushed into the hard metal. Sam felt the markings on the wall cut through her BDUs and the flesh beneath. Pain surged through her back.

Finally, Nirrti let up and Sam fell down onto the ground in a heap. Greedily, she sucked in air, trying her hardest to stay conscious. But she could feel her powers leaving her rapidly. Her attempts to challenge Nirrti, the unfamiliar power sweeping through her and finally Nirrti's repeated use of the hand device had taken a considerable toll on her body. She could feel her mind swimming and her thoughts slowing already.

With an unthinkable effort Sam managed to get onto her knees. Footsteps tapping over the floor told her that Nirrti was coming over to her. The Major placed her elbows on the ground and looked up, bracing herself for what was undoubtedly about to come.

The Goa'uld bent down to her, obviously enjoying her superior position.

" _Major Carter. You_ will _help me, whether you want it or not,_ " she said confidently.

Sam's body shook with the effort to stay conscious. Her tired and beaten body screamed for a break, but she was unwilling to give in.

And suddenly, Sam knew, what was going to happen. She knew what Nirrti was going to do. And Sam had no possibility anymore to defend herself. Her powers were drained, she was barely holding on as it was right now.

"I'm going to fight you. Every step of the way," she threatened.

Nirrti smirked victoriously, believing herself to have won already.

Again Sam felt the power of the hand device bear down on her. Her elbows gave in immediately and she crashed down into the ground unceremoniously. Her body failed her fast. Darkness loomed at the corner of her mind and her exhausted body was ready to give in, only to escape the excruciating pain she couldn't defend against anymore.

Beaten, Sam lay on the cold ground, closing her eyes. She wanted to continue to fight, but the pain dancing through her made her want to escape, if only for a short time. Again the picture of her friends invaded her mind. She saw them as she had so many times before: in the 'Gate room, preparing for an immediate departure through the Stargate. Daniel was excitedly bouncing on his heels, impatiently awaiting the new mission. Teal'c stood next to him, steady as a rock, an unwavering presence. And then there was the Colonel. As usual, he had chosen the place right next to her. As soon as they would get the go-ahead, he would let her go up the ramp first, she knew. And when she would pass him, he would look up to shoot her an encouraging smile, betraying his own anticipation for the upcoming mission paired with his habitual alert. She would stride up the ramp towards the waiting wormhole, all the while feeling his reassuring presence at her back. She would know unfailingly that, the moment she stepped into the event horizon, he would be right behind her. He always was.

Thinking of the Colonel surprisingly hurt. Right now, Sam felt she'd failed him. She had let Nirrti gain the upper hand. She had let the Goa'uld defeat her and now was about to get subjected to her experiments. She should have fought, no matter how bad her condition was. She had let the Colonel down.

" _I'm sorry, sir,"_ she thought defeated. _"I'm so sorry…_ "

It was her last conscious thought before unconsciousness crashed over her like a tsunami, dragging her down.


	20. Planning

_Again, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty – Planning_

Jack stormed through the 'Gate room's blast doors the moment the alarms blared out. He was at the ramp's base the second the Stargate kawooshed to life and tensely, he waited. It didn't take long, until Jacob came out of the engaged wormhole. With a brisk pace, the retired General stepped down the ramp, while the wormhole behind him disengaged.

"Jacob," Jack greeted as composed as he managed nowadays.

"Jack," the Tok'ra answered, before raising an eyebrow questioningly. "Going somewhere?"

Surprised, Jack looked at him. "Unfortunately, not really," he admitted. "Why?"

Jacob looked him up and down. "You look ready for a mission," he commented.

Then Jack understood. Of course Jacob must have gotten that impression seeing him like that. Instead of the more casual on-world uniforms they usually wore on base, Jack wore the black standard BDUs, complete from the boots up to the thick jacket. The only things really missing were his protection vest, his weapons and the equipment to fill the tactical vest. But actually, Jack had been strolling around the base like that for the last two days, and Daniel and Teal'c looked much the same, so no one even commented on their sight anymore.

"Just… like to be prepared," Jack evaded the other man's searching eyes.

"Of course," Jacob commented dryly and Jack had the indistinct feeling he had been seen through.

Without saying anything, Jack turned and preceded Jacob up to the control room where Daniel, Teal'c and General Hammond waited. Upon seeing Daniel and Teal'c in full combat dress, too, Jacob seemed to overthink his earlier thoughts, but he didn't say anything further.

They exchanged quick greetings, but nobody was willing to spend much time on it.

"So do you have any news?" Jacob asked tensely.

Daniel shook his head. "Unfortunately not," he said.

Jacob looked surprised. "What do you mean, you haven't?" he asked. "Sam's been gone for two days already, hasn't she? And still nothing?"

Jack gritted his teeth at the underlying assumption that was swinging through in the retired General's words. He knew Jacob didn't mean it like that but the Colonel couldn't help but feel accused of having failed to gain any information on Carter's current whereabouts. Hey, it wasn't as if they had just sat around here, doing nothing! In fact they had done everything they could think of, starting with going to the planet Nirrti had dialed from the SGC, but, as Jack had feared, it had brought them nothing for Nirrti hadn't been there anymore. She had already gated to another planet they had no knowledge of by the time they had arrived on the unfamiliar planet. And so they _were_ practically _forced_ to sit by idly and do nothing, because…

"We just don't have a starting point where we could start searching," Daniel explained.

"I see," Jacob answered flatly.

"So we're really glad you could come that fast, Jacob," General Hammond threw in, ever the polite diplomat.

The former General dipped his head in a curt movement. "Of course, George," he answered. "We're talking about my daughter here! I immediately cancelled my undercover mission and I won't go back to the Tok'ra before we've found her."

"And, um… how do the Tok'ra see this?" Daniel asked tentatively, also ever the diplomate.

Jacob shrugged uncaring. "They agree. Mostly, anyways. George and Jack are right after all. Sam knows much about us and her knowledge in the hands of the Goa'uld could be devastating."

"Oh," Daniel commented.

Jacob chuckled suddenly. "And Selmak says to screw them all. Sam's more important than any undercover mission."

"Wow, a snake with a decent understanding of right and wrong," Jack remarked sarcastically. "And I thought I'd never see the day."

Jacob shot him a disapproving look Jack didn't bat an eyelash to. But then Jacob's expression changed and almost with a smile, he said: "Selmak says thank you. She's aware that, coming from you, that's a compliment."

Jack gazed back almost affronted, forgetting to blink for a moment. "Yeah… of course," he drawled.

"So, how can I help?" Jacob asked into the small round, effectively changing the topic.

Daniel stepped forward. This was his part, after all. "We hoped the Tok'ra had some knowledge on Nirrti's whereabouts," he explained.

"Nirrti?" Jacob asked. "She has Sam?"

"Yes."

Jacob grumbled displeased. "Unfortunately we don't have much intel on Nirrti. Since she's a rather unremarkable, minor Goa'uld who isn't trying to enslave the whole galaxy, the Tok'ra doesn't bother much with her."

Great, Jack thought sarcastically. Trust those geniuses of the Tok'ra to lose sight of one of the most dangerous Goa'uld! Nirrti might not be one of the great System Lords with much power and Jaffa, but she was dangerous in her whole own way. And if she would succeed with her experiments, she could easily become the most fearsome threat of them all!

"Damn!" Daniel swore uncharacteristically. Jack looked at him astonished.

"What?" the archaeologist grouched displeased. "Now we really have no idea where to start searching!"

"Maybe we have," Jacob contradicted.

"Oh? Care to explain that?" Jack asked sweetly.

"Well, Nirrti isn't really on good terms with the other Goa'uld System Lords," Jacob began, thinking. "In fact, she's a persona non grata. She couldn't really hide on one of the Goa'uld's planets."

"And she also couldn't hide on one of the planets under the protection of the Asgard," Daniel continued. "They have technology that would detect her immediately."

"That would speak against a lot of planets," Teal'c mused.

"Exactly," Jacob cut in. "Nirrti would need an uninhabited planet, where no one could expose her presence and where she's undisturbed for her experiments."

"So we just need to go through the cartouches and see which planets fit!" Daniel declared enthusiastically.

" _Just?_ " Jack repeated stunned. "Do you have any idea how long that would take?"

"You have a better idea, Jack?" Jacob wanted to know.

"No," the Colonel grouched, kicking a nearby standing chair.

"Okay, then start immediately," General Hammond ordered. "Keep me updated on any progress."

"Yes, sir," Jack sighed and then let himself fall into the chair he'd just kicked.

Daniel sat down in Sergeant Harriman's chair that was still empty, since the Chief Master Sergeant was still recovering in the infirmary. With quick moves the linguist had pulled up all addresses they had of planets. Jack only needed a glance at the seemingly unending list to know this would become a looong day. Still, he didn't say anything further. If this was their only chance to find Carter, then he would do it, no matter how much time it would take.

"Okay," Daniel began. "Let's begin with… P6K-8779."

Jacob's head lowered and then Selmak's voice said: "The Tok'ra know this planet. It's under the Goa'uld System Lord Bastet's reign."

"So that would rule out this planet," Daniel concluded and grabbing a sheet of paper, he scribbled down a quick note before he read out the next planet: "P53-P2X?"

Jack shook his head. "Nah. That planet's protected by an Ancient device that recognizes Goa'uld."

Daniel looked up astonished. Even Teal'c and Jacob turned to gaze at Jack and feeling slightly watched Jack straightened up. "What?" he asked self-conscious.

"How do you know?" Daniel inquired curious.

Jack raised an eyebrow. "We've been there," he answered matter-of-factly.

Daniel shook his head. "No, we haven't," he contradicted.

Jack scowled at his friend. "Of course we've been there, Danny-boy," he grumbled, annoyed that Daniel just had to talk back to him. "How the hell else should I know?"

"Well, that's the question," Daniel agreed. "Because we haven't been there before!"

"Been too!" Jack growled.

"No, Jack, we _really_ haven't been there before!" Daniel insisted. "Neither SG-1 nor any other SG team!"

"Daniel Jackson is correct," Teal'c cut in. "I also do not remember being on this planet before nor have I heard the name somewhere before."

"Oh, c'mon!" Jack snapped. "How the hell do you guys think I would remember this planet then!?"

"Maybe it's your active Ancient gene," Jacob suggested, when nobody seemed to know an answer to that.

Jack almost rolled his eyes. "And how is a gene supposed to know locations?" he inquired skeptically.

"Obviously, it doesn't," Daniel lectured. "But maybe the Ancient gene makes you recognize Ancient places subconsciously. Or it makes you able to access the last pieces of the Ancient knowledge still hidden in the depths of your memory from that repository device? Or…"

Jack raised a hand, while simultaneously rubbing his temples. Their task was going to give him a headache early enough without Daniel having to add to that. "Fine, Space-monkey. _Whatever_ the reason, I believe you. We haven't been there before and I'm turning into a clairvoyant."

Daniel totally ignored Jack's sarcasm and nodded, pleased that, for once, Jack had given in and admitted defeat to him. Crossing out P53-P2X as a possibility, he went back to the list, mumbling: "Okay, then let's continue. P7– nah, forget it. SG-10 has been there and it has a large, flourishing civilization. Unlikely as Nirrti's hideout. Then what about…"

And in this manner, they continued on, working through the lists. Teal'c and Selmak identified all planets belonging to any Goa'uld System Lord, Daniel commented on the planets SG-1 or any other SG team had visited already and Jack labelled all planets he knew were under the Asgard's protection or somehow belonged to the Ancients. Much to his displeasure, Daniel had been right and his newly awakened Ancient gene made him recognize Ancient planets, even if he hadn't visited them before and that was… just strange. He could even remember if those planets had some kind of intruder's defense system on their disposal that would rule that planet out as Nirrti's retreat.

Jack really hoped this would work. In spite of all the other Goa'uld who weren't really trying to hide themselves, Nirrti wasn't that easy to locate. Not at all. In all the years fighting the Goa'uld they hadn't gained any intel on her or some planets belonging to her territory. In fact, if it hadn't been for the treaty with the Asgard and Thor's interference, then Jack thought they might perhaps not even have stumbled upon Nirrti yet, much less one of her planets.

The first planet SG-1 had naturally checked after the one Nirrti had gated to from the SGC had been Hanka. Jack had all but turned Nirrti's laboratory upside down, but this time it had really been deserted. They had especially taken TERs with them, so that this time they could be sure there was no invisible Goa'uld escaping their eyes or, worse, freeriding back with them to Earth. Unfortunately, as much as Jack would have wished it otherwise, Hanka had now truly been abandoned by the Goa'uld. Nirrti was gone. And had taken Carter with her.

And so they had no other possibility than to find Nirrti's hideout by process of elimination.

It took them hours upon hours. Even though they could rule out most planets almost immediately through their collective knowledge, the sheer number of planets available made it a long-term task.

At two o'clock in the morning they finally decided to take a break. The base was only sparsely lit and aside from them, only the skeleton crew was still there.

Groaning, Jack slid down in his chair and threw his feet up the controlling computers, his fingers rubbing over his tired eyes. Carter would have thrown a fit if she'd been here with them and seen it, he realized idly. She'd never taken too kindly to his rough use of her precious computers.

"I need a coffee," Jacob declared. Stiffly, he stood up and then walked out of the control room in search of a coffee machine. Teal'c left the room after him without a word. Jack followed his exit with his eyes, but didn't think much of it. Normally, when the Jaffa didn't specifically announce where he was going, he had to use the facilities.

Groaning audibly, Daniel lowered his head until it hit the metal next to the computer's keyboard. "I admit that was not really one of my best ideas…" he complained.

Jack leaned his head back, until it hung down over the chair's backrest. "How far are we?" he wanted to know.

Daniel let his head roll to the side so that he could look up onto the monitor's display. He had a pattern pressed into his forehead from where his head had lain.

"Halfway through. Approximately," he stated.

Well, that wasn't too bad, Jack thought. If they kept that up, then, maybe, they'd be finished somewhere around midday tomorrow.

"How many planets are a possibility?" Jack questioned, barely hiding a yawn.

Daniel looked at him calculatingly. "Twenty-three," he answered.

Jack blinked tiredly. Twenty-three. So if it continued like that, then they had to check, what? Forty, maybe fifty planets? Still quite a bit, but much better than the hundreds upon hundreds of planets the Stargate network offered. Fifty planets, that was doable. They just had to send a MALP and see, if the planet really was fitting, because after all, there surely were a few planets that had developed an atmosphere that wouldn't support life anymore or maybe a few couldn't even be reached per Stargate anymore. You never knew. And when they'd ruled out those planets, then there couldn't be too much left where Nirrti could hide.

"Jack?" Daniel asked quietly.

"Yeah?"

"Why don't you go get some sleep?" Daniel suggested softly.

Jack's head shot around, bleary eyes boring into the archaeologist's. "What!? No _way_ am I leaving!"

"Come on," Daniel sighed. "You could still give your input after a few hours of sleep. You haven't slept at all those last days, have you?"

"I did sleep!" Jack contradicted defiant. A few hours at least. And in a chair here in the control room.

"In a chair here in the control room!" Daniel shot back upset. Jack gaped at him. How did he…?

Daniel sighed with sympathy. "I know for one that you haven't been in your quarters since… _then_. And Siler saw you."

Jack gritted his teeth crossly. Sometimes this base was worse than any tattlers!

And yes, _of course_ , he hadn't been to his quarters again! Only the thought pained Jack. Okay, that wasn't exactly right. He had been there shortly to get something here and there, but it had only taken him one look at his bed with the still ruffled sheets he hadn't bothered to do the last time he'd slept in them to make him turn on his heels and flee. It were his quarters but Carter was just too present there for him to stand being there. Ironically, it had been only one night she'd spent there with him and already, he couldn't get it out of his head. Only the thought to sleep in his bed, where she'd just lain with him a few nights before, made Jack's stomach churn. He wouldn't be able to stop thinking about her in his quarters. It was decidedly hard for him as it was already…

"Daniel, I'm fine," the Colonel declared, trying to get his friend to stop worrying.

"But, Jack–"

"No, Daniel! I'm. Fine," Jack insisted. "I have healing abilities, for cryin' out loud! A bit less sleep doesn't bother me that much anymore!"

And that was true, mostly anyways. Jack really could heal himself much like Teal'c's symbiote or Selmak could compensate for their host's lack of sleep but until now Jack hadn't really gotten the hang on this healing thing. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. He had to concentrate really hard and he apparently lacked experience. He needed training, but right now, he had more pressing problems. He could deal with that when they'd brought Carter back, he had decided.

Footsteps announced Jacob's return. Jack turned and saw Teal'c follow in the other man's wake. The retired General flopped down in his chair and effectively interrupted any conversation between Jack and Daniel. Slowly, the smell of hot, fresh coffee filled the control room and Daniel groaned longingly.

"So, shall we continue?" Jacob asked exhausted.

Jack grunted in something of a response and Teal'c answered: "I believe you say 'Let's get this past with'?"

" _Over_ with," Daniel corrected absentmindedly. "Let's get this over with."

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Jack twirled with his chair, while Sergeant Harriman next to him went through what was by now familiar routine. He'd really seen this often enough by now to be bored with the sight.

This was their – Jack actually had to take a moment to count – eighth attempt and Jack really hoped they would finally stumble upon any sign of Carter. First of all, because General Hammond would otherwise get problems to justify the means the SGC was going through, and because they were slowly running out of planets that would fit Nirrti's requirements.

When Jack, Daniel, Teal'c and Jacob had gone through the list of planets, they had come out with thirty-eight possible planets. One after the other, they had dialed the planets up and sent MALPs or UAVs to assess them. To five planets they couldn't establish a connection, their Stargates maybe buried or taken away. Six planets had developed a hostile environment neither humans nor Goa'uld could live within. On twelve planets they had been greeted with developed and flourishing civilizations, deciding that Nirrti would probably not hide under them. She would stand out and somebody would have seen her. Because while the Goa'uld was able to cloak herself, she couldn't do that with her Jaffa or Carter. So ruling out these planets, they were left with fifteen possible planets. Four of them had nothing in the Stargate's near vicinity. The Stargate's had been placed in uninhabited deserts or in the middle of vast meadows. Even the UAVs hadn't been able to make out a trace of any civilization whatsoever and Daniel had theorized the cultures existing there to have gone down already for this reason or another. But Nirrti needed available structures she could use, because, according to Jacob, she didn't have the resources left to build them herself.

So they concentrated on the eleven left-over planets that provided that. One after the other they had dialed them up and sent further MALPs to try to judge which planet would offer the best chances to hold Nirrti's hideout and would warrant an SG team to investigate. But seeing that they had to operate around the SGC's usual schedule with teams arriving and departing, and the occasionally occurring emergency here or there, it took quite some time to go through these planets. So SG-1 and Jacob had taken to take turns. Either someone of SG-1 or Jacob was always present when another MALP was sent through the Stargate to determine whether or not they should investigate this planet further. So far they had ruled out five planets because they had been visibly deserted and taken two trips to other planets, but they had found nothing. No trace of Carter or Nirrti.

And now they were on the eighth attempt, Jack thought glumly. It had been days since Carter had gone MIA, again.

He didn't do well with the waiting and the doing nothing…

The Stargate swooshed to life and immediately, the MALP down in the 'Gate room began climbing up the ramp, only to disappear into the glistening event horizon a minute later. Harriman followed the MALPs travel through the galaxy on the monitor and Jack imagined Daniel next to him do the same. He however was staring at the event horizon absentmindedly.

"Receiving telemetry from the MALP, sir," Harriman reported towards him.

Yeah, yeah, of course they did. What a surprise.

"Get it on the monitor," he sighed nevertheless, an order he'd given uncountable times in the last days.

Almost listless, Jack turned and let his eyes travel over the picture on the display. If this would turn out to be another failure then Jack feared he would explode. He was cranky already and the situation was more and more tearing on his nerves. He had noticed that, by now, Teal'c had taken to stand directly behind him, wherever he was, and follow him around, as if his friends were expecting him to blow up like a bomb any time. It didn't really help his mood, even if it was quite practical whenever he needed another training session with the Jaffa. Because, whenever Jack felt like it was getting too much to bear or he had time to waste until the next departure of a MALP, he would storm into the gym and work out, sometimes for hours on end. Teal'c always followed him and whenever Jack asked, the Jaffa would spar with him. He never volunteered for it, but he helped Jack when he desperately needed an outlet for the nervous energy threatening to overtake him.

Yeah, Jack didn't really do well with the waiting. He was a man of action. He needed something to do, a task so he wouldn't feel so useless.

Rather disinterested, Jack now observed the pictures the MALP sent from its destination, while it rattled down a few steps from the Stargate. This time it had landed between ruins from what Jack could tell. The camera slowly swung around, giving them an overall view. Collapsed housing structures as far as they could see. Remnants of walls and roofs littered what had once probably been streets of stone, chunks of rock and parts of columns blocking the way here and there. The MALP visibly had difficulties getting anywhere.

"Sir, I fear, we won't be getting anywhere with the MALP," Harriman confirmed Jack's thoughts. "Maybe we should send an UAV."

Jack was about to order it done, when Daniel suddenly reached out, his hand clawing into Jack's upper arm with quite a bit force.

"Ow! Space-monkey?" Jack prompted surprised.

"Jack! There!" Daniel said excited, pointing to something at the monitor.

Jack leaned forward and tried to see what the archaeologist had picked up on. First he thought it to be a shadow, but then he realized it was the frame of something. Something that moved.

"What…?" he inquired.

Something reflected, letting a blinking point of light appear on the picture the MALP sent them. Jack narrowed his eyes. He knew that kind of blinking. Metal. Light was reflecting off of something metal. Something that was most likely an armor of some sort.

"I think it's a Jaffa," Daniel confirmed his thoughts.

"Well, well, lookie there…" Jack drawled, before he stood up from his chair. "Harriman, get the MALP back to the Stargate to hide it, but try to be inconspicuous. Daniel, Teal'c, get geared up!"

"Jack! Where're you going?" Daniel yelled after him, when he turned and headed for the stairs leading up to the briefing room.

"I'm going to inform General Hammond that we're doing a little recon," he answered over his shoulder.

Jack had no means of knowing if that were really Nirrti's Jaffa, but it was the first sign of _anything_ Goa'uld they had stumbled upon since Carter's disappearance. And he wasn't about to let any chance slip by he could get to get her back!

* * *

 _A/N: I know, not much happening in this chapter. It was still necessary. But the action and drama will be back soon!_


	21. Finding out

_As usual, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Author's note**_ _: Much to my dismay, there was a little mistake in the last chapter, so thank you to the_ _ **guest**_ _who pointed that out! It's not uncommon such mistakes occur when I rewrite passages in the chapters (which I do quite regularly), but I usually find and correct them before I post the chapter. But since I am the only one who proofreads, there's only so much I can do. That one simply slipped under my radar… I went back instantly and fixed the mistake, however. And for the other questions and suggestions the_ _ **guest**_ _had, I hope this chapter clears it up. There simply wasn't the space for the explanations in the last chapter._

 _And with this said, back to the story._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-One – Finding out_

Jack was on high alert the moment they exited the Stargate. The MALP had thankfully gone unnoticed by the Jaffa, but it was unlikely they would get that lucky another time.

Still, although he went from the engaged wormhole with his weapon raised and ready, nobody was waiting for them on the other side. Even though Jack had actually expected that, he couldn't help the little relieved sigh he did while he waited for his team to arrive. Before moving out, he had gotten in a heated discussion with General Hammond about their proceeding on this mission. That SG-1 was to go and check the situation out was a given and Jack hadn't been willing to budge on that fact, but the 'how' was another question altogether. The General had insisted on the usual SOP, which meant sending an UAV to check out the situation and the numbers of the enemy, but for once, Jack had argued against it heatedly. He knew it was a high risk to go into a mission without that information that would ensure his team's safety, but overall he feared that if they would send an UAV to fly over the Jaffa's heads to assess Nirrti's troop numbers, they could as well light a giant neon sign that read 'Hey there, we're coming!'. For this mission they needed stealth and the moment of surprise. And since they knew from the Tok'ra that Nirrti didn't have much resources or Jaffa, Jack thought the risk was calculable. Nothing his team couldn't handle with their experience.

To say the General hadn't been pleased with Jack's suggestion of ignoring the SOPs would be pretty accurate. But then again, they were immensely pressed for time. Every passing second that Carter remained in Nirrti's clutches left the Goa'uld with the possibility to gain information from her and who knew what that would reveal to the Goa'uld. So in the end, Jack had won his little argument with the General and had been allowed to come to this planet with only the information they had gotten from the MALP.

So when Sergeant Harriman had dialed up the planet once more, they had activated the MALP's camera and using the device still left on the planet, they had found out that the Stargate's vicinity was deserted, which would ensure their safe arrival. Honestly, Jack had been astonished. It was more than sloppy to not watch the Stargate, if you were trying to guard a _god_. But he wouldn't complain.

Jack remained on guard until Daniel and Teal'c had arrived safely and the wormhole had shut down. He was slightly expecting Jaffa to come running for them, because while their MALP had been hidden from sight by the ruins in front of the Stargate, the wormhole kawooshing to life had had to be seen somewhere. Still, nothing.

Jack was wary. Nirrti had to expect they were coming after her, so why wasn't she guarding the Stargate?

Then again, Jack knew there could be various reasons for that. Either Nirrti wasn't here anymore because she'd seen their first activation of the Stargate and had escaped while Jack had been preparing for the rescue mission or she did have better things to do or this wasn't Nirrti's territory to begin with. Since they hadn't seen the Jaffa's forehead symbol, they couldn't be sure. For all they knew this could be a hideout of some rebel Jaffa or some other Goa'uld had taken this planet over. Whatever it was, neither option was really what Jack wanted. He _needed_ this to be Nirrti's hideout and their incredible luck just a fluke of fate.

Together with Daniel and Teal'c, Jack crouched down and silently made his way through the ruins, sticking to the collapsed walls and huge chunks of rock for cover. Jack had debated taking Jacob with them but had eventually decided against it, even if he was pretty sure he'd get it from the former General for that decision. But Jacob had just had retreated for some rest – the capture of his daughter _was_ taking a toll on him, too – and for this mission Jack needed a small, inconspicuous team. So who better to take than the men he could read without having to look at them? SG-1 worked like a well-oiled machine and there was no one Jack trusted more to have his back.

So while he now made his way through the ruins unseen, Jack knew unfailingly that Daniel and Teal'c were watching his six. Noiselessly, they covered the distance to where Jack estimated he'd seen the Jaffa stroll around the MALP had made out.

But soon, they couldn't move on. Jack stopped, when the ground suddenly gave way before him. Taking cover behind a column, the Colonel looked around. They were standing in the ruins on something like a wide hill. Down below them the ruins stretched on, going as far as Jack's eyes were able to see. Jack understood. He'd believed the structures on this hill to be the remnants of a city, but they were merely _one_ building. One building that had apparently hosted the Stargate, but had collapsed around it during time. What stretched out beneath them was the city. And from what Jack could make out, a rather large one.

The Colonel pulled out his field glasses and swept his eyes over the surroundings. With one hand he reached out and grabbed hold of the column to steady himself. Suddenly a familiar feeling tingled up his arm. Surprised he looked back and saw markings on the column he recognized. These were Ancient structures! Probably the most and largest they had ever found!

Jack was surprised. He hadn't recognized this planet as an Ancient one when they had gone through the list of planets. He had missed this one and seeing how he had been able to identify so many other planets he hadn't ever been to before, he was quite stunned. How could this planet have slipped his mind? Had it been the fatigue that had made him screw up? Or was it because this planet was apparently one of the very few Ancient planets Jack could think of that did not have some kind of intruder defense _and_ was not inhabited? Jack had no idea. But he knew for sure, he wasn't wrong. This planet was Ancient. Jack's newfound Ancient side recognized the lines carved into the stone and quite stunned, he realized he could even read them. Well not like he could read English, where he actually understood the words and were able to write and pronounce them, but he simply knew the meaning. It was as if his brain skipped the Ancient language and directly converted the words to English. Daniel would have a field day at this discovery, Jack thought distracted. But then he focused back on the task at hand. Right now it was not the time for this sensational archaeological found. Maybe next time.

"Jack," Daniel whispered next to him.

Jack looked over to where his friend huddled behind the fragments of an outer wall, Teal'c standing next to him. Just like Jack himself, the archaeologist had his field glasses in one hand, the other one pointing down at something.

Jack looked down over the vast ruins. Further away, where the ruins gave ways to a clearing in between them, the Colonel could make out a rather huge assembly of Jaffa. He grabbed his field glasses to get a better look.

Apparently, there were two groups of Jaffa standing opposite each other, because Jack could make out different symbols on their foreheads. Approximately about thirty Jaffa stood on each side, heavily armed and staring at the other group suspiciously. Great, Jack thought. Apparently they'd stumbled into some kind of meeting that, by the looks of it, could go downhill rather fast, and they were greatly outnumbered. Better to stay unseen then, he thought.

But then another thought dawned on Jack. This assembly down there probably was the reason why they had been able to come to the planet undetected. If there was some kind of meeting going on, Nirrti would have kept the small number of Jaffa she had at her disposal to herself seeing how the Goa'uld were rather infamous for betraying their own if it suited their situation. And the two Goa'uld meeting up would be distracted enough with themselves and the danger they posed to the other snake's life to let a small, inconspicuous SG team slip through. Which worked out pretty good for SG-1.

"Whose Jaffa are those?" Jack asked towards Teal'c.

The Jaffa looked on, not needing field glasses. "From what I am able to make out, these are Nirrti's and Ba'al's Jaffa," their friend said confidently.

"Ba'al?" Jack echoed.

"One of the System Lords," Daniel supplied, being a source of never-ending knowledge. "From what I've read, even a rather powerful one with vast territories."

"Never heard of the guy," Jack replied, while watching the Jaffa imitate menacing statues down below. "And, apart from that, what kind of name is 'Ba'al'?"

Daniel ignored his sarcasm. Instead, the linguist said torn: "I wish we could hear what they're talking about. Maybe we could get a hint on Sam…"

Jack agreed. Just watching would get them nowhere. Determined, the Colonel stashed away his field glasses. "I'm going down," he announced.

Daniel's head swiveled around and he looked at him as if Jack had gone crazy. "What? Down _there_?" he asked baffled.

Jack nodded and then turned a stern gaze on his friend. "And before you ask, I am going alone! Understood?"

"But Jack!"

"No, Daniel!" the Colonel cut him off. "Alone, they won't notice me. Trust me, I've done this before. And if they do spot me, then I _order_ you to return to the SGC immediately! Leave me back and go as fast as you can! Do you _understand?_ "

Jack's eyes bored into his friend's lighter ones. He knew Daniel hated every part of his plan and that it went against every believe of his friend to leave a team member back. But Jack had to make sure that at least someone of their team would return to the SGC and report their discoveries to them. Someone had to continue to search for Carter, even if he screwed up here.

"Okay," Daniel agreed reluctantly.

Jack nodded and shared a quick glance with Teal'c. Jack didn't entirely trust Daniel to really leave him back, but he trusted on Teal'c to drag the archaeologist back to the Stargate, kicking and screaming if necessary. Teal'c was a warrior, just like he was, and he saw things similar to the way Jack did. The Jaffa would understand the necessity of Jack's orders and he would fulfill them.

Now reassured, Jack began his descent. Carefully, he maneuvered through the ruins, wary of where he placed his feet. He had to be fast and quiet, but he couldn't risk a crash and he couldn't risk being spotted, so he was cautious.

When he had finally gotten to the bottom of the steep hill, he halted, when his radio crackled to life.

" _Jack, be careful_ ," Daniel's voice said. " _There's an Al'kesh arriving._ "

Jack looked up and saw the mid-range bomber slowly lower down from the sky. Apparently it had just arrived out of space and was now making its way down to the planet. Talk about timing, Jack thought grimly. Now he would bet anything they had arrived at some kind of meeting and even just in time.

The Al'kesh provided a rather good distraction and so it was easy for Jack to make his way through the ruins to where the Jaffa stood waiting. He took up position behind a wall's corner and even risked a glance over the wall's edge. The Jaffa stood unmoving, but tense. As if they were waiting for someone or something.

Suddenly a light flashed not far away and rings appeared. Another handful of Jaffa appeared and in their middle stood a tall man. From the haughty attitude and the richly decorated garments he wore Jack had no trouble to recognize a Goa'uld. And going by the marks on the Jaffa's foreheads this had to be Ba'al. Still a ridiculous name…

Jack watched the man walk over to where his Jaffa were waiting and immediately, another figure stepped out of the ruins. As if mirroring Ba'al's arrival, the figure was surrounded by six guards. Jack swept his gaze over the surroundings attentively. Obviously both Goa'uld had agreed on a certain number of Jaffa to take with them, but Jack would bet his life that Ba'al's Al'kesh was practically bursting with Jaffa and the rest of Nirrti's Jaffa's were distributed all throughout the ruins, out of sight. He really had to be careful and he hoped Teal'c and Daniel were, too.

Jack observed the figure that was now walking over to stand with Nirrti's Jaffa. It certainly wasn't Nirrti, that much Jack could say. Neither the height nor the body frame matched.

The man, Ba'al, crossed his arms in front of his chest and just like Jack, he seemed to study the smaller figure standing opposite him. It was a woman, but Jack couldn't really see much of her. Her figure was covered with a long skirt that went down to her feet which stuck in richly adorned sandals. A tight top hugged her torso and from her head fell something akin to a veil. The bejeweled cloth was held on top of her head with something like an ornamented headband and fell down to her back. The left side of it was draped over her shoulder and clipped to the right side of the headband, hiding most of the female's face under the veil.

For a moment both Goa'uld seemed to seize each other up with their eyes and a tense atmosphere floated in the air. Then Ba'al inclined his head minimally in what was probably supposed to be a greeting.

" _Nirrti,_ " he acknowledged. " _Long time no see._ "

Jack's eyes narrowed in concentration. The snakes were, of course, speaking in Goa'uld, but Jack had picked up enough bits and pieces here and there in the years of fighting them that he was somehow able to follow the conversation. Jack had always had a knack for languages even though he could by no means speak or read the Goa'uld's language, but why should he bother anyways? That was Daniel's job and who was he to ruin Space-monkey's fun? Jack however found it important he could at least follow basic conversations in Goa'uld, because it would give him the advantage of knowledge when the enemy still thought him unaware and he usually wanted to know what was going on around him anyways. So he had tried to remember whatever words he stumbled upon and what he didn't know was most of the time cleared up by the context.

The woman opposite of Ba'al nodded back. " _Ba'al. Thank you for coming,_ " she answered with the typically warped voice of a Goa'uld that was slightly muffled by her veil in a manner that indicated she had nothing less but expected the System Lord to be present.

Jack felt shivers run down his back at hearing the woman's voice. Something about it felt all wrong for him.

" _You look different,_ " Ba'al commented lightly as if he was talking about the weather.

" _I have chosen a new host,_ " Nirrti answered.

" _What was wrong with the last one?_ " Ba'al wanted to know.

" _She was nearing her… body's limits,_ " Nirrti said cryptically, but the System Lord seemed to accept that answer.

" _So, what do you want?_ " Ba'al asked.

" _I want my position within the System Lords back,_ " Nirrti all but ordered.

" _Oh? Do you?_ " Ba'al asked amused. " _And what do you need me for?_ "

For a moment, Nirrti was silent, but finally she admitted, more than reluctant: " _I need… help._ "

Ba'al looked down on his hands, almost uninterested. " _It's not that easy to rise up back to the rank of a System Lord, once you've fallen because of betrayal. The System Lords do not forgive that easily,_ " he commented.

" _I know,_ " Nirrti said.

" _You would need the support of a strong System Lord or the others would banish you immediately,_ " Ba'al continued, gloating.

" _I know,_ " Nirrti repeated, although it sounded strained by now.

" _Well that explains at least why I had to come here,_ " Ba'al finished presumptuous. Jack impulsively decided that he didn't like the man.

" _So?_ " Nirrti prompted the man.

Ba'al tilted his head to the side, his gaze growing calculating. " _Well, what's in it for me?_ " he inquired.

" _Power,_ " Nirrti answered simply.

Ba'al laughed out loud. " _How is it going to bring_ me _power, if I help add another System Lord to the ranks?_ "

" _Because I have knowledge,"_ Nirrti answered, still calm. " _Knowledge that would give you some advantages._ "

Ba'al watched her and Jack could tell that the System Lord was intrigued. " _What knowledge?_ " he wanted to know.

Now it was Nirrti, who crossed her arms in front of her chest. " _You want me to reveal it here and now? Then what guarantee would I have you would still help me gain my objectives?_ "

" _Well, you will have to give me something, woman. I don't make uncertain deals,_ " Ba'al countered.

" _Very well,_ " Nirrti agreed. " _I have gained sensitive and important knowledge of the Tau'ri's structures and defenses_."

Ba'al raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued, while Jack's stomach dropped to somewhere around his knees. Oh god, knowledge about Earth's structures and defenses? How could Nirrti have gained that?

The answer was pretty simple, though. Only through Carter.

Jack closed his eyes in dread. Carter was military, she would never reveal such information voluntarily! What had Nirrti done to her to get into possession of such information? Jack didn't even want to imagine.

" _Hm…_ " Ba'al drawled. " _I've heard of the Tau'ri, but I don't have any problems with them. Why would I need knowledge about them?_ "

" _You might not have encountered them yet,_ " Nirrti agreed. " _But they have the most annoying habit to meddle with things that are not their problems. Sooner or later you will cross them. They seem determined to destroy the Goa'uld._ "

Now Ba'al really laughed out loud and a few of his Jaffa even chuckled. " _Oh please!_ " he snorted and Jack gripped his weapon tighter. Yes, he really didn't like this man.

Nirrti shrugged. " _You could still strengthen your position within the System Lords with the knowledge. Quite a few of them have difficulties with the Tau'ri and if you would be the one in possession of the key to their obliteration…_ " the Goa'uld baited. " _But maybe you'd be more interested in the knowledge I have of the Tok'ra and the Asgard?_ "

Jack paled. Really, what had this Goa'uld done to his 2IC? Squeeze her out like a lemon?

Ba'al seemed to think for a moment and then he said: " _Interesting… Alright. What do you need from me?_ "

" _Just your approval for my rise back to the position of a System Lord and your fleet, once the attacks begin,_ " Nirrti answered.

Jack shifted uncomfortably, suddenly understanding. Nirrti was planning war for them! And Carter in her hands could assure that she had a few unfair advantages that could cost them dearly.

Suddenly, a brick in the wall behind him gave way from his shifting and fell, making a very audible sound. Jack froze for a second, but then reacted immediately. He let himself fall to the ground and cautiously crawled away. He had merely ducked behind a large chunk of rock a few feet further away, when one of Nirrti's Jaffa searched the place he'd just been hiding in.

Phew, that had been close, he thought, his heart racing with the sudden adrenaline rush.

When the Jaffa finally returned, Jack observed the two Goa'uld. Ba'al seemed amused more than anything, obviously trusting in his Jaffa to have secured any planet he'd set foot on, but Nirrti seemed alarmed. She questioned her Jaffa heatedly and with such speed that Jack didn't understand a word anymore.

Jack took the time to study the woman from his new hideout. He was closer to her now and had a clear sight on her. Well, he couldn't really see much of her that wasn't hidden by some kind of cloth, but it was still more than before. Something about her felt oddly familiar for the Colonel.

His eyes travelled over her, scrutinizing, trying to place a finger on the uncertain feeling of familiarity. Suddenly, the Goa'uld looked in the general direction of where he hid and her eyes were visible to him.

Jack gasped, feeling sucker punched. A nauseous feeling washed over him and left him fighting for air. His lungs felt like cement. For a moment all thoughts swam in his head and he had trouble relating to the reality. This couldn't be!

Almost as if electrocuted, Jack jumped up and stealthily made his way back through the ruins. He didn't look back to see if he was being pursued, he just trusted on his speed and the lead he had. The way it all stayed calm behind him however told Jack that his retreat had gone thankfully unnoticed. He wasn't about to slow down, though.

The moment he was out of hearing range, Jack radioed Daniel and Teal'c and ordered them back to the Stargate. He didn't even wait for either of them to confirm the command, but began climbing the hill. For a moment he contemplated telling them what had happened so the information couldn't get lost no matter what happened to him but then dismissed the thought. It would only cost him time and breath to explain it all and he had neither to spare right now. He just had to ensure he would get back.

As soon as Jack had overcome the hill, he ran. He had to get back. Immediately. He needed to report the information he'd gained, come hell or high water. It was downright essential to their survival.

Pushing his legs to their limit, Jack rounded blocks and walls, his eyes firmly glued to the shape of the Stargate looming in the distance. His mind was blank, he only operated on instinct and habit, his military training taking over and telling him what to do.

When he finally dashed towards the Stargate, Daniel and Teal'c were waiting in its front, but the MALP had already disappeared, sent back by the two men.

"GO!" Jack yelled, not even caring for stealth anymore.

Daniel and Teal'c seemed confused, but they obeyed and stepped into the event horizon. Jack threw himself after them only seconds later.

Cartwheeling, he emerged on the other side, only halting when he crashed into the MALP, which was parked at the end of the ramp leading to the 'Gate. Groaning, Jack straightened, feeling even more fucked over. What a day…!

"Jack!" Daniel yelled confused and worried.

Jack felt the other man's hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong? What happened?" the archaeologist asked.

Jack didn't acknowledge him. "Close the iris!" he yelled over the blaring alarms.

Immediately the event horizon's light behind him was blocked out by the shield sliding in place and not long thereafter, the wormhole disengaged and only then Jack let himself fall back against the ramp. Dimly, he heard General Hammond call for a medical team even though he didn't need one.

Jack closed his eyes exhausted and immediately was greeted by the picture of the eyes he'd seen. Nirrti's eyes. They had been blue. Blue eyes. Blue eyes he was very familiar with. Carter's blue eyes…

He felt like crying. Because he knew what it meant. And this was worse than any torture the Goa'uld could have put his 2IC through.

* * *

 _A/N: I am sooo glad I finally got this chapter off my back! I haven't had that much problems with any other chapter before. I've rewritten parts of it like what, seventeen times? And I still think it's rough and bumpy. Well, whatever. Next one will hopefully be better.  
_


	22. Coping

_**Author's note:**_ _First, of all, I apologize for the longer delay! Onset of winter has gotten me sick…_

 _Then, to the guest who had a few suggestions for this chapter: I hope this will satisfy you. I realize it is probably different than what you imagined but all chapters are typed out already and changing them would mean I'd have to rework the whole story. But you had a few very interesting thoughts that I'm thinking of turning into little spin-offs once I'm done…_

 _And last but not least, thank you all once again for showing your support in whatever way you choose!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Two – Coping_

Only minutes later, Jack stood in General Hammond's office. Daniel and Teal'c had followed him the moment he had stormed from the 'Gate room, almost bowling over the confused medical team that had come for him.

General Hammond, who'd been in what looked to be a heated discussion with Jacob, had looked up astonished.

"So I take it the unscheduled off-world activation was SG-1?" General Hammond inquired mildly, not even commenting the rather rude way in which Jack had ploughed into his office.

Jack opened his mouth, but Jacob wouldn't let him answer. With blazing eyes the Tok'ra stepped up to him, declaring angrily: "Jack–!"

Jack didn't wait for the man to run hot.

"Jacob!" he interrupted urgently. "You can chew me out all you want afterwards, but right now, we have other problems!"

In the baffled silence that followed Daniel closed the office's door behind them softly before he went to stand next to the Colonel. For a second, Jack became aware that his best friends actually demonstrated an astonishingly firm reign over his infamous curiosity. Under normal circumstances, Jack wouldn't have believed to be able to make a step from where he'd landed in the 'Gate room before Daniel would have started to question him. Teal'c would have patiently waited for what Jack deemed the right opportunity to tell him, but with Daniel? No such luck. So Jack was almost amazed that his friend had managed to stay silent so long. Guess he was doing whatever was in his abilities to help with the situation, too.

General Hammond stood up to be eye level with all the other men crowding his office and asked: "Then SG-1 found something?"

"Yes, sir," Jack agreed. "The planet we were on…"

He trailed off and looked at Daniel questioningly. "P5Z-187," the archaeologist supplied helpfully.

"Yes, on _that_ planet, we managed to find… Nirrti…" Jack continued, slightly insecure how to phrase it.

Jacob immediately looked about to forgive Jack. Almost grateful, he looked at Jack and the Colonel felt highly uncomfortable under the other man's gaze.

"That's good news," General Hammond nodded.

"Not really," Jack mumbled, scratching his neck uncomfortably under the scrutinizing gazes of his friends.

Jack inhaled deeply and then continued: "Nirrti was there for a meeting with another Goa'uld System Lord, Ball–"

"Ba'al," Daniel and Jacob corrected immediately. Jack waved them off uninterested.

"They were discussing Nirrti's return to the System Lords," Jack continued.

Jacob raised an eyebrow astonished. "Nirrti has betrayed another System Lord and seriously injured him. The System Lords won't accept her back."

"That's why she wanted Ball's help," Jack stated. This time no one made the effort to correct him. The news he'd brought back were distracting enough.

Jacob crossed his arms in front of his chest and Jack could almost see Selmak make big ears. "Ba'al wouldn't help her. For several reasons," Jacob stated firmly.

"Um, let's just say, he wasn't really averse to it," Jack mumbled. "In fact, he was pretty much interested."

"Why? What could Nirrti possibly have that would make Ba'al want to cooperate with her?" the Tok'ra asked.

Jack almost had to press out through gritted teeth: "Information."

"What information?" Daniel wanted to know.

"Information about the Tau'ri, the Tok'ra and the Asgard. About their defenses, structures, military forces, whatever…" Jack sighed.

"How would Nirrti possibly have gained such knowledge?" Daniel wondered.

Jack exchanged a grave gaze with Jacob and General Hammond standing behind the other man. Yet it was Teal'c who answered the quite obvious question: "Major Carter," he stated matter-of-factly.

Jacob shook his head disbelieving. "Sammie's military," he said and then turned dark eyes onto Jack. "You should know best she would never tell our enemies anything, Jack!"

"Yes, I know, Jacob," Jack shot back. "However, she didn't really have a choice!"

"What do you mean?" the former General inquired.

Jack closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. He felt suspiciously like dropping a bomb on his friends.

"Nirrti has blended with Carter. She's been taken over by the Goa'uld."

Shocked silence greeted Jack at that statement. Jacob actually reached back towards the desk standing between him and the General to steady himself.

"No…!" he pressed out shocked.

Jack risked a quick glance at Daniel and Teal'c. The Jaffa did his best to look unfazed but he didn't quite manage and Daniel? The linguist looked as if he was seriously contemplating throwing up in the General's office. He was white as a sheet with a pale, unhealthy shade of green staining his cheeks.

"I'm sorry…" Jack said to no one in particular. Stony silence reigned in the room, leaving a strained, tense atmosphere behind, while all men present wrecked their minds for something to say to those devastating news.

"That is… bad," Jacob finally admitted.

"Indeed," Jack and Teal'c agreed simultaneously, the Colonel crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"We have to take immediate measures," General Hammond said grimly. "If what Colonel O'Neill has said is true, then it could be that we'll soon be facing an outright war with the Goa'uld."

Jack, Jacob and Teal'c nodded. Daniel on the other hand still seemed frozen to the spot.

"What do we need to do?" Jacob said grimly.

"Well, I'm sorry, but first of all, we have to completely lock Major Carter out of our systems. Her identification codes will need to be blocked and her access codes need to be deleted," General Hammond decided resolute.

If Carter really was determined to get into their computer systems, then Jack feared a few access codes wouldn't stop her, but he saw the need for precautionary measures. He would have done the same, even if the thought of Carter trying to come through the iris and fail because her codes had been blocked was downright painful.

Then again, she wouldn't. For her to be able to return, she needed to get rid of the Goa'uld first and really, what were the chances?

"And then I will have to inform the President and the Joint Chiefs of Staff," General Hammond continued. "We might need to prepare for a war."

Jack's head began to swirl at the implications that slowly began to dawn on him. If the Goa'uld were really coming to start a war against them, then _everything_ would change. The United States wouldn't be able to keep the Stargate a secret any longer. It would practically be impossible with alien motherships knocking at the proverbial door. Jack could all too easily imagine the mass panic at the revelation that an alien race was coming to rage war on Earth. Not to talk about what it would do to the planet's inner political relations. The other nations would turn against the United States, believing them to have brought the war onto them. If worst came to worst, they'd have a war on two fronts: against the Goa'uld and against other nations. And it was possible a civil war could break out over that, as well…

So put in a nutshell, Jack was sure that it would rip Earth apart in some way or another. All because of those snakes' hunger for power. A feeling akin to hate began to roar to life within Jack, but he pushed it down, concentrating on the crisis at hand.

"Sir, we cannot allow that war to happen!" Jack pressed.

General Hammond nodded. Of course he would understand the implications, the waves this dropping stone could and would cause. "Yes. And we will do what needs to be done. But I still feel better when we have prepared for all cases."

Jack inclined his head in agreement, seeing the logic.

"We need to inform our allies as well," Daniel threw in. "It could very well be the Goa'uld will attack them, too."

Jacob and General Hammond nodded.

"I will inform the Tok'ra," Jacob said.

"And Colonel O'Neill will try to contact the Asgard," General Hammond decided. Jack nodded absentmindedly to the order.

"But tomorrow," General Hammond continued, casting sharp eyes on SG-1. "I want you to rest today. Take the evening off and recover."

Jack wanted to argue on that, he wanted to stay and _do_ something, the adrenaline still rushing through his body still riling him up, but he knew he wouldn't stand a chance going by the General's unyielding stare that told him this wasn't as much a recommendation as it was a clear order, so he nodded, as well as Daniel and Teal'c. Before leaving however, the Colonel threw a last, sympathetic gaze at Jacob. "So no more chewing me out?" he asked, trying to joke. It fell on deaf ears.

Jacob shook his head. "No, Jack. You were right to leave me back. You're the Officer in Charge, so you decide who goes on the mission and who stays back. I'm… retired. I guess I have to get used to the fact that I'm no longer making these decisions."

Jack smiled to show the other man his appreciation but due to the horrible day he had it turned out rather lame, even he himself knew that although he couldn't see it.

Together with SG-1, Jack turned to leave the office when Jacob held them back once again. "Jack?" he asked.

The Colonel looked back over his shoulder. "Yes?"

Jacob looked thoroughly exhausted, when he said: "Nevertheless… thank you."

Jack's mouth went dry, heavy feelings of guilt and sadness weighing him down, but he still managed to get out: "I wish I could have done more, Jacob."

And wasn't it the truth. Jack really wished he could have done more; more for Carter. He hated having to leave her back on that planet with a snake in her head that controlled her body and her actions. He hated offering her up to the Goa'uld System Lords defenseless. He hated leaving her in the hands of the enemy who could use her brain and body to destroy everything she loved and had worked hard for.

Jack felt a monster headache approach when he finally left the General's office and followed Daniel and Teal'c down the hallway towards the elevator.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Together and in complete silence, SG-1 rode up to their private quarters. Together and in complete silence, they wandered down the hallway to halt by their quarters. Almost as one, their gazes went to Carter's room. They stared at it dejected, each of them feeling the loss of their team mate.

Daniel sighed. "Does anyone of you also feel like this is going to be a long night?" he asked.

Teal'c and Jack nodded. General Hammond had practically forbidden them to work, even if he'd used nicer words, and so they were essentially forced to sit out the night in their quarters, each one hunted by their thoughts.

"Come on," Jack said, pointing to his room. "Team night at my quarters."

The moment he'd said the words he'd said on so many occasions before, he wanted to swallow them back. _Team night_ … What kind of team night was that without Carter?

But Daniel and Teal'c nodded, the linguist visibly happy for the company. What had Jack told her, before she'd been taken? _Company helps_ …

Jack opened the door to his room and switched on the light. Teal'c immediately went over to sit in Jack's armchair, dwarfing the chair even more with his bulky mass. Daniel flopped down on his bed, stuffing Jack's pillow into his neck, before he leaned back against the bed's headrest with an exhausted sigh.

Jack went over to the mini-fridge hiding in a corner beneath his desk he'd brought to the base and opened it. "Coke or Soda?" he asked.

Teal'c declined, but Daniel demanded a Soda. So Jack threw him a bottle, before he grabbed a coke. He really wished it were a beer, though. Or two. Maybe even three. Too bad alcohol of any sort was forbidden on the base. And Jack would not leave the base and drive home only to get decently drunk, even if that felt like a good plan after the day he'd had. Instead, he very much planned to camp out on the base until they'd somehow gotten Carter back. Just the thought of being away from the center of action, the possibility of missing something, of missing the critical information, maybe even the beginning of the crucial S&R mission to get her back made him seriously consider if General Hammond would mind if he'd start sleeping in the control room…

Well, Jack certainly would stay close. He wanted to be ready. The moment they went to get her, Jack would be standing in the first row. Come hell or high water.

Grimly marching through his modest sized room, Jack let himself fall onto the bed next to Daniel. Copying his friend's posture, Jack took his tousled blanket and put it in his neck, before he leaned back against the hard headrest. The moment he inhaled however, Carter's scent drifted over to him from the blanket and he was again heavily reminded of the night she'd spent here, with him. Suddenly he was glad for the guys' presences. He would have gone nuts if he would've had to spend the night alone with his thoughts of Carter and her scent.

"So… and you're really sure, it was Sam?" Daniel asked hesitantly into the suffocating silence that reigned between them.

Jack took a deep swig of the coke, failing to answer.

"I believe O'Neill's eyes to work correctly," Teal'c cut in.

"I know," Daniel admitted, picking restlessly at his bottle's cap. "I just thought…"

"Yeah, I wouldn't have minded to be wrong, either," Jack agreed.

For a moment neither of them said a word, each man absorbed in their own thoughts.

"How do you think she's… doing?" Daniel asked then.

Jack shrugged unknowing. "I don't know if she's even aware," he answered.

Daniel nodded and then whispered: "Sha're could watch. She told me. She _had_ to watch, but she couldn't do anything else. She had no control…"

Jack closed his eyes, trying his best to not imagine Carter being imprisoned in her own head, screaming unheard, trying to fight for her freedom, while her body did unthinkable crimes. Aaaaannd… yeah, too late.

Jack clapped his hand on Daniel's shoulder, trying to cheer the other man up who had just managed to drive himself further down with the thought of his deceased wife.

"We will rescue Major Carter," Teal'c said confidently.

Jack nodded. "Damn right, we will, T!"

There really was no other option in Jack's opinion.

Daniel looked skeptical and was also obviously still reliving what had happened to Sha're.

"Major Carter is strong. She is a fighter. She will not bow to Nirrti," Teal'c went on confidently.

Daniel smiled at him, but rather agonized. "You're right."

Yeah, and if the archaeologist would now only believe his own words, Jack thought sarcastically. Then again, he himself knew how hard a task it would be to get Carter out of this mess. Not only was it difficult to get a Goa'uld out of a human's head, the snakes rarely left voluntarily. And Nirrti could inflict heavy damage on Carter, if she saw fit. But Jack didn't say anything. He was pretty sure, the guys were aware.

"And _we_ will not fail Major Carter," Teal'c added with all the trust he had in their abilities seeping into his voice.

Daniel smiled again, this time relieved by the thought. "We don't leave our men back, do we?" he asked humbly.

"Never," Jack agreed. "We're one team and no Goa'uld will ever break us apart."

He'd do anything to prevent that.

The male part of SG-1 looked at each other, all distributed throughout the room thrown in half-darkness, connected to the others in a whirlwind of more or less controlled emotions ranging from anxiety to fear, restlessness, anger, worry, concern, agitation and impatience. Something had been taken from them and they would all fight tooth and nail to get it back. To get Carter back. SG-1 simply wasn't the same without her. And the knowledge that they all felt the same, that they all were in the same situation – more or less – was helping their frazzled nerves and reassuring them enough to hope for a happy ending to the misery they had suddenly found themselves stuck in.

So they continued to sit together in Jack's room, silent but drawing strength from the others presences.

The next thing Jack became aware of was complete darkness. He had shot up in his bed, his chest heaving hard, gasps of air escaping through his opened mouth. The adrenaline rush lashing through his body told him he'd just had a nightmare, even if he couldn't remember what had happened in the dream. Groaning, the Colonel rubbed his tired eyes. Slight snoring next to him told him Daniel had fallen asleep next to him but from what he could make out in the dark, Teal'c had left. Probably to do some kel'no'reem in his own quarters. He was most likely also the one who'd switched off the lights to let his teammates rest that had fallen asleep without noticing.

Jack turned to look at the digital clock on his nightstand… and fell out of his bed. Cursing out loud heatedly, the Colonel smashed his fist on the hard concrete ground, only to hiss out in pain afterwards. For a moment he seemed to see red with anger before all energy disappeared from him, leaving him drained and beaten. Sighing, he leaned his forehead against the cold ground. He should've expected this, he thought idly. Daniel took up way more space in his bed than Carter…

Then again, he wasn't this angry because he'd fallen out of his bed. That could happen. And was nothing to go berserk over.

Jack shifted so that his cheek rested on the cool floor and looked up. 0327. Really no time to be awake, but his brain apparently didn't care. While his body felt all heavy with fatigue, his mind was too awake, too antsy for any sleep to settle in again.

Sighing again, Jack reached up to the bed and pulled his blanket down to him. He felt too exhausted to stand up and crawl back into his bed. And the thought of sleeping with Daniel in a bed that was one-man-sized wasn't really enticing, either.

Jack couldn't even remember falling asleep. When they had stopped talking about Carter, they had just sat together, staring off into space. The last time Jack consciously remembered looking at the clock had been sometime after one o'clock. So he had managed, what, something about two hours of sleep? Fantastic. This was surely what General Hammond had had in mind by 'recovering'!

Jack wrapped the blanket around him without lifting his head from the floor. He pulled it up to his shoulders and again, Carter's scent surrounded him. He inhaled deeply. Her scent in his room was about as soothing as it was saddening. It somehow lessened the aching hole in his chest, but then again, it only pointed out how much she really was missing. He wished _her_ to be here with him instead of only her scent. He wished for her to have been with them during their 'team night'. He wished it had been her with him in his bed and Daniel would be the one sleeping on the floor due to the lack of space. He simply wished her to be here, with them, safe.

Jack buried his nose in his blanket, inhaling the lingering scent. How long until her scent would fade? How long until there would be nothing left of her? Would they get her back? Would they manage to rescue her?

Jack normally wasn't that pessimistic. But the sheer devastating track record they had with the Goa'uld left him doubtful. They had lost Kawalsky to a Goa'uld. They'd lost Sha're to a Goa'uld. He'd almost lost Ska'ara to a Goa'uld. And he had almost lost Carter to a Tok'ra snake before. Jack closed his eyes tightly, trying unsuccessfully to block out the memories swarming his head. Carter standing in the 'Gate room with a hand grenade, threatening to blow them all up if they didn't let her go. Carter lying in the infirmary, as white as a sheet, while Janet tried to revive her. Carter flat lining. Jolinar speaking with Carter's voice, trying to bait him with her, telling him she could give her back to him, unharmed. Carter standing in her cell, calling out to him desperately, pleading with him to believe her, begging him to rescue her…

He hadn't been able to help her then. It had been pure luck that then it had been Jolinar who had possessed her at that time and that the Tok'ra had decided to spare Carter's life when her time had come. Certainly, Nirrti wouldn't do that.

Still, Jack was determined to help Carter this time. He would do _anything_ he could to help her. No way was this going down anything like the last time!

" _Hang in there, Carter,_ " he thought.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Jack looked down through the thick glass of the briefing room's window onto the motionless Stargate in the 'Gate room. The MALP still stood in a corner of the room, waiting for its use. But they had to wait until SG-12's scheduled return, before they could activate the Stargate and let the MALP check out another planet. And SG-12 was late.

Jack raked a hand through the mess that was his hair, staring indignantly at the MALP, even though the robotic machine wasn't at fault. They had to do it all over again. Daniel had declared that Nirrti wouldn't have her hide-out on a planet she would reveal to another Goa'uld and much to Jack's dismay, Jacob had agreed. This planet had merely been a meeting point, not her current headquarters. So they had to go through all those eleven planets they had singled out for Nirrti's possible retreat all over again. So far Harriman and Daniel had worked through six planets without success.

Jacob and Teal'c had used the small breather to return to their planets to alert their people: Jacob had gone to inform the Tok'ra of the current situation and Teal'c had left to prepare the upcoming Free Jaffa. The better prepared they were, the harder it would become for the Goa'uld should they declare war on any race. Already, the SGC's diplomatic team was working on forming and deepening alliances which would ensure them and their allies the help of the other races, if the Goa'uld would attack.

But this time, Jack couldn't help either of them. As the SGC's 2IC, he, as well as the General, were completely busy with the NID's delegation that had arrived yesterday. Already, Jack had a few, very tiring hours of meetings and discussions behind him he really could have done without. Those bureaucrats infuriated him beyond words and the first time a brave (or stupid) one of them had dared to ask if it wouldn't simply be the best solution to erase the very apparent threat – meaning Carter – only Jack's iron self-control had prevented the man from flying through the briefing room's window. General Hammond had icily declared that he would proceed with _his_ officers as _he_ saw fit, which thankfully shut the guy up and placated the roaring beast in Jack's chest enough so that he didn't need to claw his fingers into the briefing table to avoid storming down to Level 28's armory and get his P90 to, say, shoot the guy.

For now, the General had taken control of the situation and he really proceeded as he thought was best but Jack wondered how long he would still be allowed to. Those NID guys wanted to launch a full investigation of the situation (whatever _that_ meant) and Jack feared they would dig something up that would make the Joint Chiefs decide General Hammond wouldn't be the best choice for the Officer in Charge anymore.

"Colonel O'Neill?" a voice said behind him.

Jack turned and studied the handsome, neat man with the all-proper suit standing behind him who smiled at him encouragingly. He didn't smile back, though. He had used up all his politeness and patience in the heated discussions before.

"Bennett, it was?" he asked.

"Barrett. Malcolm Barrett," the man corrected, not at all piqued that Jack had apparently not bothered to remember his name. "Special Agent, NID."

That much Jack remembered however. He was the guy in charge of the ongoing interrogations.

"What can I do for you, _Special Agent_?" Jack inquired, while turning back to the Stargate. Still no sign of SG-12…

"Call me Malcolm. Or Barrett, if that feels better for you," the man said, coming to stand by his side. Even now, it felt strange for someone to stand there next to him, Jack realized idly. Normally that was the place Carter would stand in.

"What do you want, Barrett?" Jack asked, feeling the last bit of his patience drain fast.

"I just wanted to speak with you," Barrett answered.

Jack shot him a disdainful gaze. "Sorry to inform you, Agent, but I'm usually not really good company and now even less."

Barrett didn't seem fazed by the Colonel's sour mood. "I noticed," he stated amused.

Jack raised an eyebrow questioningly. "And still, you're here."

"Yes," Barrett confirmed. "I just wanted to tell you that we're not the enemy. I'm not here to cause problems for you and your team."

"And you're sure of that?" Jack asked sarcastically.

"Yes, Colonel. Positive," Barrett smiled.

Suddenly, the Stargate beneath them activated and SG-12 returned, thankfully unharmed. Only a minute later, Jack saw the Stargate spin again and the MALP slowly roll up the ramp while the wormhole engaged. The MALP disappeared in the event horizon and he and Barrett watched silently.

"Truly a sight to be seen," Barrett said, nodding to the 'Gate.

Jack grunted something noncommittal in response. Yes, the Stargate was all fantastic and such, but right now the Colonel was too exhausted and dealing with too much shit to really feel captivated by this fabulous alien piece of technology. Somehow, whenever he looked at it nowadays, he only saw Carter working on it, repairing this or that with Siler, while Daniel made smart comments from the sidelines…

"I don't ask you to trust me," Barrett continued, ripping Jack from his drifting thoughts. "I have a feeling you're not one to give trust freely. I just want to do my work and find out what happened to Captain Carter."

"Major," Jack interrupted sharply.

Now Barrett looked at him, surprised by the outburst. "I'm sorry," he said earnestly, holding up his hands in a placating gesture. "I haven't had the time to work through her file yet. It is rather thick and by now almost completely classified. And certainly took quite some time to get through to me."

Jack didn't answer. In his opinion, the whole conversation they currently had was superfluous and unnecessary. He had given a thorough report of what had 'happened' to Carter. Given, he had left out her newfound powers because as far as he was concerned, this didn't concern the NID, so he failed to see what the NID might still need to investigate.

"You're right," Jack replied suddenly. "I don't trust you. I don't trust the NID in general. But as long as you don't get in my way, I'm willing to tolerate you and your investigation."

Barrett looked stunned at this brute honesty. "Well, that's a beginning, I think…" he said.

Jack had to give the man some credit. He tried his best to reach out a hand towards Jack and to adapt to the Colonel's quirks. Still, Jack was wary. As he had said, he didn't trust the NID and General Hammond's warnings concerning his and Carter's powers were still fresh memories.

"Jack!" Daniel's voice suddenly called out from somewhere behind him.

Jack turned and singled his friend out over all those NID assholes' heads that were crowding the briefing room, trying to decide where to begin to investigate, while the Colonel and the SGC tried their best to safe various races of a threatening war, having to work around them. He finally made out his friend at the stairs that went down to the control room where he had worked with Harriman.

"We found something," Daniel announced.

With a few strides Jack had crossed the briefing room, following the archaeologist down into the control room without as much as saying goodbye to the Special Agent.

"Show me!" he demanded.


	23. Fighting

_**Author's note**_ _: So, the moment you all seem to have waited for: Sam's thoughts on her capture. Though, I have to admit that, in my initial draft of the story, this chapter wasn't existent, at least not as it is right now. But there were many asking to read Sam's POV and since you all took the time to leave a review or very helpful PMs and I unfortunately lack the time to answer you (or updating would take considerably longer), I thought this might be a decent thank-you. Initially, this should have become a small paragraph added to what has been chapter 23 until then, but as it seems to be a reoccurring theme with this story it grew totally out of hand and morphed into a chapter of its own (really, I have never written anything before that is forcing me to go into such depth). So, seeing that this wasn't in the initial story, I had to take a few days and make it fit, and now I sincerely hope it doesn't feel squished in somehow. From the next chapter on, I will continue with the story as it was and updates should get more regularly.  
_

 _And with all this said, I hope you'll enjoy the additional chapter!  
_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Three – Fighting_

Sam's eyes opened slowly and with carefully controlled movements. Sam felt puzzled because even though she had been awake and aware, she certainly hadn't commanded her eyes to open. She tried to blink in an automatic reaction to her bewilderment but astonishingly, her eyes didn't follow what she had told them to do. They simply stayed open, swaying from left to right, taking in her surroundings. What was going on?

Sam followed the sight her eyes were allowing her but she didn't recognize her surroundings. Everything was thrown into half-darkness and although she could see remarkably well, she still didn't recognize what appeared to be living quarters as she seemed to lie in a bed. Not her own, though. That she would have recognized by feeling alone. Not the infirmary, either, that one she knew all too well from uncountable visits, too. So where exactly was she?

A blurry, bulky vision stepped into her line of sight and Sam tried to adjust her eyes to see better but again, they didn't heed her command. From the movements in front of her, Sam caught that the shape was human but only when it spoke, in a language as familiar as unknown to her, Sam realized it was a Jaffa.

Military training and habit ensued Sam wanted to jump up and run, fight or defend – whatever the situation called for – but again, her body didn't cooperate.

The Jaffa stepped closer, lowering down to her, and finally, Sam's eyes adjusted and she could see the large, tall, dark man up close. His forehead was marked with a golden tattoo, telling Sam he was a First Prime, and he was carefully studying her. Sam looked right back into his face, but to her complete bafflement, she wasn't met with the usual hard, condemning stare. Instead, he looked… worried?

Again the Jaffa asked something in Goa'uld and Sam was inclined to point out that she didn't understand a word of what he was saying, when she heard her own voice answer in perfect Goa'uld. It was what ultimately tipped Sam off something was terribly wrong. She couldn't speak Goa'uld. She hadn't wanted to speak yet, let alone anything in Goa'uld. She didn't even understand what she had just said!

The Jaffa however seemed relieved by what she had said and with utmost care he extended a hand towards her. Baffled, Sam watched her own hand rise against her will and take the offered limb so that the Jaffa could pull her up into a sitting position. As soon as Sam sat, her voice snapped something at the Jaffa and he hurriedly let go of her hand as if he'd burned himself. Sam was confused. She was grateful for the help, wasn't she?

Sitting upright proved to be strangely taxing. Sam's head swam and going by the spinning picture in front of her eyes, she guessed, her body did, too. But Sam couldn't feel it. With an alarming amount of panic, she realized she couldn't feel her body at all. She was aware, aware of herself and her environment, but aside from that, there was nothing. It was as if she was floating. The normal, natural sense of feeling her own body, to feel her lids working over her eyes, to feel her chest rise with every intake of breath, to feel her own pulse vibrate through her body in the background, to feel her limbs brush over material when she moved, it was all gone.

And frighteningly, Sam knew this feeling. She had felt this feeling of complete loss of control, of being shoved into a far corner of her own mind, before. When she had been taken over by Jolinar. This was exactly the same.

So Sam knew what was happening. She had been taken over by a Goa'uld! And the last one she consciously remembered being in close vicinity of, had been Nirrti. Nirrti had turned her into a host and had taken over the control of her body!

Oh god, Sam felt like getting horribly sick. This was downright devastating and Sam felt crushing panic and fear begin to overwhelm her when all the implications of what had would mean slowly filtered in for her.

And as soon as the horrifying thoughts took hold of her mind, Sam felt the mental equivalent of a chuckle reverberate through the little corner she had been pushed into.

" _I was wondering when you would become aware,_ " a familiar voice taunted.

Sam bristled immediately. " _Nirrti!_ " she scowled back mentally.

" _Of course, Major Carter,_ " the Goa'uld gloated gleefully.

" _Get out of my body!_ " Sam growled, but she already knew it was futile.

" _This is_ my _body now,_ " Nirrti brushed her off matter-of-factly. And Sam knew that wasn't just a phrase. The Goa'uld really felt that Sam's body belonged to her now, to do with it as she pleased.

" _It's not. It never will be,_ " Sam answered nevertheless, just for good measure.

" _Complain all you want. There is nothing you can do, though,_ " Nirrti said with such a pleased voice that Sam imagined a wide grin spreading across _her_ face. It wasn't as if she could still feel it, though.

Sam scowled once more but refrained from saying any more. It seemed to highly amuse the Goa'uld and Sam wasn't about to give her the satisfaction to freak out in her presence. It was bad enough Nirrti was knowing by her thoughts.

" _You humans are no fun,_ " Nirrti remarked offhandedly but again, Sam refused to take the bait.

Instead she was trying to find a way out for herself. Her brain raced, going through every option she could think of. But unfortunately, the list was very short. In fact…

"You _can't do anything,_ " Nirrti reminded her kindly.

Sam grumbled crossly. She knew she was defenseless. The enemy had effectively taken over her body and mind. There was nothing she could do to reverse the situation or get herself out of it somehow. In fact, brainy, ingenious Major Samantha Carter was utterly powerless at the moment. Utterly useless. And Nirrti knew it as well as she herself.

The Goa'uld laughing with glee in Sam's head, Sam could do nothing than watch Nirrti rise from her bed in Sam's body to stand on her feet and then, with a harsh snap that was undoubtedly a command, follow her First Prime out of her quarters into even darker corridors. Sam had never seen this place before and had no idea where she was, but Nirrti seemingly had no problems finding her way around.

Quietly seething with anger, Sam followed Nirrti's way attentively. Whenever they crossed a Jaffa in the hallways, they bowed with respect and ushered what Sam believed to be some kind of greeting. Nirrti never bothered to answer but in all honesty, Sam didn't think any of her Jaffa's expected that.

The First Prime was talking to Nirrti and the Goa'uld answered but since Sam knew next to nothing about the Goa'uld language, she had no idea what they were discussing. Glumly, she vowed to herself that, if she managed to get out of this somehow, she would make an effort to learn the Goa'uld language from Daniel and Teal'c. Who knew what she could have learned from these conversations?

The First Prime turned and looked at Sam – no, Nirrti – and the Goa'uld answered with a decidedly unfriendly rebuke. The Jaffa hurried to get back to whatever task he was actually doing now, but Sam caught him glancing over to her again and again. First she thought him to be confused by her different look but then again, considering how old Jaffa tended to become, this hardly had to be the first body change he'd witnessed his Goddess do. But if it weren't her looks, then what did have him so confused?

Sam paid even closer attention and then she noticed something. Nirrti was slow. Whenever her First Prime asked her a question, there was a slight pause. It was only a second or two Nirrti took to answer, but it was reoccurring. It seemed as if, whatever the Goa'uld might want to show off, she didn't have as full a control over Sam as she would have liked.

Immediate joy and relief flooded through Sam's mind. She hoped, desperately, that this was a good sign. That Nirrti was still adjusting and could still be vulnerable.

Sam tried not to openly think of a plan. Instead she tried to seize the chance and act by instinct. With all the force and power Sam's strong mind had, she tried to push. She tried to fight, to strike, to bowl over, to rip, to claw her way out with sheer mental strength. Sam had always been stubborn and strong-willed and her mental powers gave her another extra push of strength.

Nirrti was taken by surprise. That much Sam could feel immediately. For a second, the Goa'uld stumbled and had to grip onto the wall to steady herself, losing the concentration she needed to operate Sam's body. Sam immediately went for it, doubling her efforts in a desperate try to regain the control over herself. Sam could feel the presence of the Goa'uld in her own head lessen, weaken, and finally shrink, Sam herself taking over to fill the building void. And Sam was about to relish in the fact that she was successful, that she was managing, when Nirrti retaliated brutally.

Pain as unlike anything Sam had felt before erupted all throughout her mind. Sam would have screamed if she still had a voice. It was a surreal feeling because lacking a corporeal body that could feel the pain physically, the pain was only a mental echo, yet it was so much stronger. Sam felt as if the essence of her very being was melting, boiling and overheating. It felt like being torn apart on a very substantial level. She tried, tried with all her might to hold on, to hold out against the searing pain, to not give in. She tried to withstand Nirrti's torture, but Sam was losing ground rapidly and finally only prayed for the Goa'uld to just _stop_. But it seemed Her Highness was set on proving a point and so she let Sam wail in the agonizing pain a little longer even when she had already recaptured Sam's whole mind.

Sam was all but a jumbled mess when the Goa'uld finally decided to let up.

" _Don't think you have any control whatsoever,_ " Nirrti threatened darkly. " _You are nothing anymore. The moment I feel like it, I can make you vanish forever!_ "

Sam knew this wasn't true, though. Whoever they had managed to rescue from the Goa'uld until now had stayed. They had been repressed but still alive. The Goa'uld couldn't make their hosts disappear in any way. Still, Nirrti's little show of power had made Sam realize how powerful a Goa'uld really was. And how miserable they could make their hosts if they were to defy their masters.

Sam still wanted to fight. It wasn't in her nature to let an enemy get away with taking over, taking over _her_ , but she realized she was in no state to do that right now. She needed to recover first.

Nirrti walked on to follow her First Prime and Sam was left trying to mold the scattered pieces of her pain-ridden mind back together. It had been nothing like that with Jolinar. Sure, Sam had heard and spoken with the Tok'ra in her head occasionally, but most of the time, Jolinar had just pretended Sam wasn't there. She hadn't harmed Sam in any way and rather chosen to ignore Sam's screaming and threatening than to act on it. She might have taken over Sam's body then, but she had still allowed Sam to participate. Jolinar had been as gentle with Sam as the situation had allowed her but Sam wasn't illusive. No way in hell would Nirrti do the same. No, she would make life as difficult for Sam as possible, of that the Major was sure.

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It took Nirrti about a day until she had full control over Sam's body. Sam noticed by the way the Goa'uld began to move her body more fluidly and didn't hesitate with her answers as if she had to get the mouth to work anymore. And Sam could do nothing than watch Nirrti get more powerful with every passing minute. In fact it was probably more astonishing that Nirrti didn't have full control from the beginning on. When Jolinar had possessed Sam, the Major had been pushed away into a far corner of her mind immediately, unable to do anything anymore. Jolinar had seized control in the split of a second and only when she had allowed Sam to speak with the Colonel had Sam been able to feel and move her body at her own will. So it made Sam ponder why Nirrti hadn't been able to get her body under control from the first moment onwards. She knew Nirrti thought it was because Sam had now powers that greatly differentiated her from other humans but Sam was pretty sure she didn't have that much practice with her abilities yet to hinder a Goa'uld from taking over. Maybe it was that Sam had been prepared for what had been about to happen? Then again so had Sha're and Ska'ara and as far as Sam knew, it had helped neither in rebelling against their snakes. So was it perhaps some kind of incompatibility? Was that possible? Or was it something completely different? Aw, how Sam wished she could study this in her lab and discuss it with Daniel…

The moment Sam's thoughts strayed to her team, Sam could feel Nirrti perk up and immediately redirected her thoughts. Nirrti had already tried twice to ruffle through Sam's memories and the first time taking Sam completely by surprise, she had managed to get her hands on quite a bit. That was until Sam had managed to interfere. It had been acting on pure instinct alone, so when Sam had managed to stop Nirrti's advance she had in fact been as surprised as the Goa'uld.

Sam knew she possessed valuable and highly classified information, of various races, and she couldn't let the Goa'uld find out anything of her vast knowledge. She had to protect what she knew at all cost or it would doom several races to destruction and annihilation. So when Nirrti had tried to go for Sam's memories, Sam couldn't help but intervene. With as much mental strength as she had, she had clutched the memories she deemed important and valuable to her mind and imagining an impenetrable wall she had literally slammed the door shut in Nirrti's face. Okay, admittedly, Sam had been as baffled as Nirrti when that had actually _worked_ but there was simply nothing like the triumphant feeling Sam had experienced that there still _was_ something she could do. She might not be able to fight the Goa'uld but she could deny her access. She could make it all the harder for the snake, maybe even impossible. And it made the crushing feeling of guilt and regret Sam was tormented with by feeling that she had failed a lot of people – and races – a bit more bearable. The feelings certainly wouldn't vanish, and Sam wasn't sure they ever would, but only the thought that she was still fighting, that she was still winning little combats against her captor even if she would lose the battle in total sometime, was reassuring. Also, admittedly, fighting got essentially easier if you knew your attempts succeeded in making a difference and you weren't severely crushed by an overpowering enemy that always had the upper hand effortlessly, and it gave Sam strength. Utterly needed strength.

Since then, Nirrti had been prodding and ripping at Sam's mental defense walls from time to time with varying strength and anger but until now Sam still had the upper hand. Her mind powers allowed her to shield the memories she'd chosen and keep Nirrti away from the little protective bubble she had retreated to. Sam knew it would leave her unable to do anything more than sit on those memories and guard them, so any attempt at escape was lapsed. She needed her whole energy and concentration to ward Nirrti off. She couldn't allow a moment's weakness, because Nirrti had already tried to rip a few memories from her when Sam had gotten exhausted. Since then Sam was in constant alarm and didn't let off anymore. She knew that, with her powers and concentration bound otherwise, Sam didn't have a chance to try and rebel against the Goa'uld. So Nirrti would stay in her body. She would truly be its owner from now on and there was nothing Sam could do against it. It was more important she kept those memories safe, no matter what happened to herself. Nirrti could use Sam's body as a lure, a bait, a trap or a hostage. She could make it a weapon of torture for those Sam knew. She could harm, injure and damage it the way she wanted and then leave it for a better host and Sam would have to be the one to die in it. Still, knowing all that and more, Sam didn't fight it anymore. She allowed Nirrti the full control of her body, retreating into her corner to ignore the Goa'uld, her whole concentration focused on her task. It didn't matter anymore what happened to her. It only mattered what would happen to the secrets Sam guarded. And the Major was determined to keep them. The greater good before her own good. This was how it was supposed to be. This was Sam's job as a US Air Force Major. She didn't matter in the grand scheme.

" _It would be cute if it weren't so naïve,_ " Nirrti laughed at her once. " _You know that you can't resist me for all eternity. Sometime you will lose your strength for I am so much mightier and then I will see_ everything _._ "

The thought was frighteningly disturbing but Sam knew the Goa'uld was only stating the truth. Sam wasn't sure how long she would be able to hold out against the annoyingly strong alien parasite that was buried in her head, constantly fighting her.

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Sam and Nirrti had been at their battle of wills for days, the Goa'uld regularly trying to tear down Sam's walls with sheer strength to get to her memories, but so far, Sam was still hanging on. Even if barely. Sam was losing strength and she knew it. Nirrti didn't even give her a minute to recover and the constant state of alert and concentration was wearing Sam down. She couldn't keep track of what was happening around her, she only focused on protecting what was important. At some point not that long ago, Nirrti had violently tried to break down Sam's walls with all she had, completely disregarding what could happen to either of them if she destroyed something vital in her rage. When Sam had still remained unrelenting, Nirrti had attacked Sam's mind brutally with such pain that Sam had been left thoroughly disorientated and experiencing phantom pain even a day after. Sam was aware she had left bits of information slip through then but she had held on to the majority and going by the rage with which Nirrti was punishing her Jaffa when she had been through mauling Sam, Sam thought that had definitely been a score for her despite how horrible she felt afterwards.

Only when Sam had been halfway coherent again she had gotten a glimpse on what Nirrti wanted the information for. She was meeting with another System Lord, Ba'al, and tried to exchange Sam's information for her rise back to the Goa'uld High Council. Despite not actually having that information, and Sam now guarding it even more fiercely, Nirrti bluffed well enough for the creepy male Goa'uld to accept the deal. And Sam felt her heart sink with desperation. She knew what that would mean for her. Nirrti would only try even _harder_ to get that information out of Sam, because she needed it. Now Nirrti would stop at nothing and Sam was in for constant torture. But giving up was no option. Only imagining the pain Sam would have to go through for minutes, hours, days, weeks and possibly even months, depending on how long Sam was going to last, she wanted to surrender, but she knew best what was at stake. She knew what she was protecting. Her home world, Earth, and its allies, races that had grown close friends. Her friends, colleagues and, most importantly, her team, her family. Sam never tried to think of them, lest the longing and aching for the three men that meant so much to Sam would make her concentration waver and she really couldn't risk that. That, and she resolutely refused to give Nirrti any information whatsoever about her friends, guarding all the little secrets and facts she knew about them like the vital, strategic military information she possessed. Still, it were those strong feelings Sam had for her team that she knew would make her hold out whatever Nirrti may throw at her. Sam would endure the torture the Goa'uld would inflict on her if it would ensure her team would be safe. She was the key to the Goa'uld's abilities to attack Earth and as long as she didn't fall, her team and the SGC at the frontlines would be in no direct harm. And for that, Sam was willing to go through literally everything.

The question was, though, how long Sam could continue to keep fighting. Sam didn't have the Goa'uld's healing abilities and although she wasn't connected to her body and its need for sleep anymore, her mind still felt the exhaustion and the strain Sam put it through. Sam was hanging on to the best of her abilities but she was aware she couldn't do that for all eternity. It would only need a second of inattention and Nirrti would take all she needed. And that was something Sam couldn't allow.

So Sam prayed. Prayed for something to happen. She was doing all she could. And she was nearing her limits. So she could only hope someone would discover her and stop Nirrti. Surely, her team was out there somewhere, searching for her. She _knew_ they were. Daniel was smart enough to figure out what had happened and Teal'c had the knowledge and abilities to track down Nirrti. And there simply was no way the Colonel wouldn't be less than a fierce, unrelenting force pushing them forwards. He would know what was at stake as well as Sam herself. Sam knew her team's abilities best and she believed in them with blind trust. She had always trusted them with her life, trusted them to watch out for her when she herself couldn't, and this time was no exception. So Sam knew they were on their way and there was nothing, literally _nothing_ , stopping them. They would find her, sooner or later. And given Teal'c's strength, Daniel's abilities and Colonel O'Neill's determination, they would be able to stop the Goa'uld in Sam. It was all the hope Sam had left. Because Nirrti seriously needed to be stopped. And Sam couldn't do it.


	24. Embarking

_**Author's note:**_ _Glad the last chapter was so well received! Thank you all for giving feedback. And now, for another thing long awaited: the rescue mission. Or at least, the first part of it…_

 _As usual, of course, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Four – Embarking_

The klaxons blared loudly and the red lights of the alarms flashed through the 'Gate room. Routinely, Jack clipped his P90 to the sling attached to his tactical vest that would hold his personal defense weapon before he controlled his other weapons: the Berretta at his thigh, the zat at his belt, his knives, ammunition and various explosives strapped to his body. His hands did the movements habitually, but his mind was someplace else. When he was finally done, he pulled his cap down over his eyes to shield them and looked around the overcrowded 'Gate room. Next to him, Daniel was busy attaching his P90 to his vest and Teal'c on his other side was already done, his staff weapon being his primary weapon. Jacob stood not far away from them with a determined expression on his face, rather standing out in his Tok'ra clothes in the sea of black BDUs.

Aside from SG-1, SG's 2, 3, 15 and Doctor Fraiser were going on this mission. Every team had a TER with them in case they were going to be confronted with Nirrti's cloaking device, but they only had a few of those weapons, so one per team was as much as General Hammond was comfortable with to allow. To avoid any confusion, Jacob and Janet had been placed on SG-1 for this mission, under Jack's direct command, to make up for the lack of his 2IC they were attempting to rescue.

Two days ago one of the MALPs they had sent to investigate the planets where Nirrti could probably hide, had finally stumbled over something. Or rather Daniel, who'd been watching the pictures the MALP had sent back to Earth, had noticed something. Around the Stargate he'd seen fresh tracks. Heavy, numerous feet had trampled down the grass around the Stargate. Given, it wasn't really a neon sign that announced Nirrti's presence, but Daniel had been sure it could have only been her and her Jaffa. And given that they slowly ran out of possibilities where to search for the Goa'uld, Jack was inclined to go with one of the archaeologist's _feelings_. Also, Jack was aware that time was ticking down for them with every passing second. He loathed every second Carter had to stand the torture of the Goa'uld placed inside of her.

Still, Jack had to wait another two full days for Teal'c and Jacob to return before he could start the S&R mission. He passed the time with preparations for the oncoming mission, while trying his best to exude patience with the NID agents. But when Jacob lastly returned from the Tok'ra – Teal'c having arrived a day before – Jack was more than ready to move out. He was on his endurance's end, _needing_ this mission to start already. The thought that he could have already gone and try to rescue Carter but still had to stay back at the base, sitting idly, was making him slowly go crazy. And, admittedly, he wouldn't stand another day in the presence of those NID assholes. He could very well understand that, due to Carter's sensitive knowledge and the threat of an impending intergalactic war, General Hammond couldn't hold back to report her gone MIA – again – and he had known beforehand that, almost instantly, the NID would send agents to the SGC to 'have a look at things'. It had been inevitable, but they were really quite interrupting and disturbing the SGC's routine and work. And Jack, for example, was by now already so annoyed by the NID agents breathing down his neck that he'd exploded on them once or twice, causing Barrett to try and play peacemaker. To his astonishment, Jack had come to something like an unspoken truce with the other man. As he'd said Jack tried to not disturb his investigation as long as the Special Agent ensured his subordinates let Jack work in peace. But that was only working so much and Jack very much still refused to go out of his way and meet those guys' wishes, so he mostly tried to avoid them as best as possible. It also didn't help his fragile patience that a few of Barrett's underlings really couldn't withhold their opinions. And if Jack heard even one of those assholes question again, if it would be justified to go through so much trouble for _one simple officer_ , he'd be likely to blow spectacularly and destroy something. Or someone. Whatever came into his line of sight first.

Shaking of his tumbling thoughts, Jack turned and looked up to the control room. At his sign, Chief Master Sergeant Harriman began to dial up the planet in question, PG9-7Z5. General Hammond and Agent Barrett stood behind the Sergeant, watching. Immediately, Jack heard the chevrons lock one after the other behind him and then the wormhole kawoosh out into the 'Gate room. By now, Barrett didn't even flinch anymore at the unexpected sight.

Jack saw General Hammond lean forwards and grab the intercom's mic. " _SG-1, SG-2, SG-3 and SG-15, you have a go._ ", he declared. " _Good luck and Godspeed._ "

Jack saluted sloppily and then turned around. His face set into grim determination, he took position at the front and jogged up the ramp. He felt Daniel and Jacob directly behind him and knew that Teal'c and Fraiser would be following suit as well.

"Let's move out!" Jack called out over his shoulder. Naturally, he had command over this mission and so he heard Majors Ferretti and Pierce and Colonel Reynolds report back with the demanded 'Yes, sir'.

Without hesitating, Jack threw himself into the shimmering event horizon, praying for them to have success this time.

" _Hold on, Carter!_ " he thought. " _We're coming_."

The moment Jack set foot on the ground on the other side of the wormhole, he was greeted with the sudden sight of a Jaffa that was inspecting the MALP they'd sent through first. Jack didn't even give himself the time to be surprised. On autopilot, Jack crouched down and fired, felling the Jaffa with a single shot from his P90. With his weapon at the ready, he turned, searching the parameters scrupulously.

Behind him, Daniel and Jacob stepped out of the wormhole and upon seeing the dead Jaffa, they both grabbed their weapons, scanning the environment attentively. One after the other Jack's men came through the engaged wormhole while he did a quick sweep of the surroundings. But he didn't find anything apart from the single Jaffa.

When he returned to his men, he found Teal'c crouched next to the fallen Jaffa. "Nirrti's sign," Teal'c reported, pointing to the Jaffa's forehead.

Yes, Jack inwardly jubilated. Jackpot!

"Well, looks like we're right here," Jacob commented dryly.

Jack nodded. His trained eyes were trailing over the surroundings without stopping. It made him nervous that there had been only one Jaffa at the 'Gate.

"And I take a lucky guess and say we'll find her there," Daniel said, pointing to something in the distance.

Jack turned and looked to where his friend was gesturing. Probably a few clicks away he could make out a structure, almost hidden by the greyish white mountain towering behind it. Jack was no archaeologist, but even he found the building looked quite similar to the pictures of the Mayan palaces Daniel had glued to the walls of his office. The building wasn't that high, probably only a few stories, but quite wide, stretching almost from one side of the Mountain to the other. Underbrush, trees and ferns had grown over it with time, suggesting that it had been abandoned for some time.

"Alright, kids!" Jack called out. "SG-15 will stay back and secure the 'Gate. SG's 1, 2 and 3 will check that structure out."

His orders were confirmed routinely and only seconds later, Jack led his teams down the hill the Stargate was placed on. They followed the meadow down to the beginnings of a forest. Underbrush grew thicker under their feet with every step and soon their combat boots began to disappear under ferns. Trees were beginning to crowd them in and eventually, they could only walk one after the other. The trees grew higher and higher, soon blocking out any light. Jack however navigated them through the thick undergrowth confidently. He'd found his way in South America on covert ops, so he could do this as well.

They walked a few hours, keeping in almost constant contact with SG-15 at the Stargate via radio. Finally, they stumbled over the first ruins of what appeared to be housing structures. Jack saw Daniel's eyes travel over the collapsed buildings with interest, but for once the archaeologist didn't seem to have any interest in studying them. He seemed more inclined to assess them as a possibility for enemies to take cover behind.

Lastly, they arrived at the palace-like structure. Stone steps led up the large building to wide archways that seemed to serve as doors. Jack inhaled controlled, his eyes searching the surroundings for possible signs of the enemy, but everything seemed calm. Maybe too calm. He didn't trust the apparent peace.

Jack waved his men forwards and together they huddled in the darkness the trees and the collapsed buildings around them provided. Even though they were in the middle of another alien forest, Jack silently congratulated him on the decision for the black BDUs. They came in handy right now, hiding them in the obscure dark produced by the big trees. And camouflage or black, neither of them would really hide them in that structure built out of formerly white stone, Jack figured.

"Okay," the Colonel began. "SG-2 will stay out here and secure our way out. Make sure, there are no Jaffa hiding out in these ruins. SG-1 and SG-3 will go in and try to find Nirrti."

And Carter, he added inwardly. Most of all, Carter.

His men nodded and SG-2 made their way back a few steps, checking out the nearby ruins. Jack signaled all others with hand signs and then, together with Jacob and Reynolds, he quickly made his way up the stairs to the archways. Taking cover behind a large, rectangular column, Jack raised his P90 and did a quick sweep of the large entrance room beyond the stairs. It was utterly empty.

He waved down to his remaining men and silently, they all made their way up to him. Together, they all filed into the entrance room, checking corners and adjoining stairs. When they had finally determined that the room was indeed empty, they met in the middle of the entrance room.

"There are stairs leading up and stairs leading down," Daniel remarked, pointing to the staircases at the other end of the room.

Jack nodded. "Reynolds, take SG-3 and search above. SG-1 will go down. If anyone needs backup, call SG-2 in."

Reynolds nodded and disappeared with his men. Jack meanwhile led his own team to the stairs going down. Again, the Colonel took lead, descending the stairs with his P90 raised to eye level. Jacob with his zat and Teal'c with his staff weapon flanked him left and right and Daniel and Fraiser brought up the rear. In silence they went down the stairs that gyrated down. They arrived in another wide room that was utterly deserted. Doors and another two flight of steps lead away from the room. Jack cursed silently. So, what now? Either they would search it all together, and lose a lot of time, or he had to split up his team.

"Jack?" Jacob asked silently.

Jack trusted his team's abilities, but he really didn't like the thought of splitting up when he didn't even have the slightest idea what could await them.

"We'll search together," Jack decided. "We'll begin at the bottom and work our way up."

His team nodded and together, they went to the stairs Jack deemed to go down furthest. Carefully, they descended into the darkness.

When they had finally gotten down to the bottom, they were greeted with a long, wide hallway. It was only sparsely lit, so it was pretty easy for them to hide in the shadows. Rooms branched off from the hallway, sometimes framed by archways and sometimes by obviously newly installed wooden doors. Cautiously, Jack pried a few of the doors open and found something akin to living quarters. Well, the rooms were obviously lived in going by the cupboards and cots Jack encountered, but the random setting and choice indicated it was a rather new accumulation.

One after the other, they tiptoed down the white stone corridor thrust into half-darkness, listening attentively for any sounds. There were vague, blurred sounds somewhere further down the corridor and Jack warily kept track of them, wanting for them to stay that far away.

"I think these are the Jaffa's quarters," Daniel whispered finally. Jack nodded in agreement.

"Then we will not find Nirrti here," Teal'c announced. "A god would never house with their servants."

"Teal'c is right," Jacob confirmed.

"Alright," Jack agreed. "Then we'll retreat and search the next floor."

Silently they made their way back to the stairs and went up to the next floor. Again they were greeted with wide rooms, a few of them blocked with new doors. And again, they encountered what seemed to be living quarters but much more richly decorated and comfortable. No cots for Nirrti, Jack figured. The Goa'uld would probably demand a nice, warm, fluffy bed.

"These are probably Nirrti's quarters," Daniel said, while examining a large painting on a wall with his eyes. Jack agreed inwardly.

"But she does not seem to be here," Teal'c remarked. "It is so silent, I cannot hear a thing…"

Jack gritted his teeth disappointed. Why was this damn Goa'uld so hard to find?

Frustrated, the Colonel took a moment to check in with the other teams, but neither had found anything. SG-15 reported that they were about to fall asleep at the Stargate so peaceful was it over there. Ferretti and his men had combed through the surroundings but hadn't found a single hair of a Jaffa. And that was probably because they were all camping out a floor beneath SG-1, Jack feared. Now SG-2 remained on stand-by. And SG-3 was still searching the floors above, but so far they hadn't found anything important.

"Let's try the last floor," Jack decided.

Again they made their way up to end in the smaller entrance room they had started out in and then looked at the doors. Jack shot a quick glance at his watch. The longer they were trudging through this palace, the higher were the chances they were being discovered and he really didn't want to risk that.

"Okay, here, we'll split up the team," Jack decided. He trusted his team's abilities enough for it, seeing that all of them staying on the same floor was considerably lessening the risks. "Jacob and Fraiser, take the door at the left. Daniel and Teal'c this one over there and I will take that one," he continued, pointing to the one furthest to the right.

"You're going alone?" Daniel asked concerned.

"Danny-boy, I've done black ops. I'm used to operate alone," Jack sighed as a response. And he wanted the abilities distributed evenly within the teams. Jacob was Tok'ra and a retired Air Force General, and Fraiser had military training as well, even if she was a Doctor to begin with. They would do fine as a team. Daniel had adopted the military ways pretty well for being a scientist and Teal'c was an experienced warrior, having been First Prime of Apophis. They were used to being in a team, so no problem as well. And Jack? As he'd told Daniel he was Special-Forces-trained and had now superhuman strength and healing abilities, so he was pretty sure, he would have no problems on his own.

Daniel finally nodded, displeased but accepting his leader's decision.

One after the other, they went their ways. Jack waited until he'd lost sight of his friends, before he turned for his door. Carefully, he opened the wooden door and stepped into the darkness. He was greeted with another wide hallway that was only sparsely lit. But in contrast to the others he'd seen before, there were only few archways branching off from the corridor to rooms, and those rooms were only small. No wooden doors had been installed here and from what Jack could make out in the half-darkness the few, small torches created, the rooms were mostly used as storage rooms.

He began to follow the corridor down and it didn't take long for the first reports from his friends to file in. Teal'c and Daniel had stumbled upon a few Jaffa and were trying to make their way around them unseen, while Fraiser and Jacob had apparently found something akin to a lab. Jack continued his way down the stony corridor, listening attentively for any sounds. But again, it was so deadly silent it actually made him more suspicious.

" _Jack?_ " his radio crackled to life once more.

Jack ducked into a hole in the wall, before he reached for the radio clipped to his tactical vest.

"Jacob?" he hissed back quietly.

" _We have found Nirrti's body,_ " the Tok'ra reported.

" _Nirrti's body?!_ " Jack echoed perplexed, immediately thinking of Carter. "What do you mean, her _body_?"

" _Sir, we have found Nirrti's former host encompassed in what I believe to be a stasis pod,_ " Fraiser's voice now ricocheted from the radio.

"And… that means what?" Jack asked, slightly impatient. "Is she dead?"

" _Well, being in a stasis pod means she isn't alive,_ " Fraiser answered tentatively. " _The stasis pod cools down the body, freezing it. Blood flow, heartbeat, breathing and brain functions stop. But since she has no vitals anymore either way, I can't tell if she's been dead before she has been placed in the pod or not._ "

"So the host could still be alive?" Jack inquired.

" _Again, I can't tell,_ " Fraiser denied him. " _We'd have to wake her up and… see._ "

"Yeah, I think we better not do that," Jack decided. He felt for the woman who had had to host the Goa'uld scientist, but he didn't want to risk his team's safety in a half-assed attempted rescue that hadn't been planned in the first place.

" _Alright. Fraiser and I will look around a bit more, see if we can find Sammie. What do you want us to do with the body, Jack?_ " Jacob asked through the radio.

Jack was about to answer when he suddenly heard a sound. Immediately alert, the Colonel let go of his radio, silencing it with a quick flip of his fingers without looking, and raised his personal defense weapon, looking around the hole's edges he was hiding behind. Footsteps. There were footsteps drawing nearer to where he hid.

Jack waited for a moment and then he could see a figure calmly walk down the hallway. Well, well, going by the confident way the figure walked, this had to be the current owner of the structure, Jack thought.

He raised his weapon, taking careful aim, when the figure suddenly halted. By coincidence in front of one of the few small torches lighting up the corridor. Jack sucked in a breath surprised. Standing only a few feet away from him was Carter.

Hidden in the dark of his corner, Jack took a moment to come clear and study her. She looked different. And not only because of those _clothes_ she wore. She stood tensely, a strange sight in the tight black leather pants with the sandals at her feet and the adorned black top hugging her torso. And in spite of the wavy curls Jack was used to seeing on her, her hair hung down smooth around her face, which looked on alert.

" _Jack?_ " Jacob's voice suddenly prompted from the radio.

Jack almost jumped at hearing the sound. Shit, he must have not shut off his radio properly! Damn it. Jack instantly grabbed the radio, trying to muffle the sound, but it was too late. He saw Carter's face shoot around, her blue eyes burning into the corner he was hiding in, her gaze unusually cold and distant, almost haughty.

" _Who is there?_ " she demanded to know, her voice echoing in a strange way from the corridor's walls.

Well, busted, Jack figured.

Slowly, he stepped out from his hideout, into the light with her, his weapon pointed directly at her. She didn't bat an eye at his sudden appearance and she didn't give any indication she recognized him. Instead, she looked at him with something akin to a sneer on her face and he firmly gripped his weapon. All alarm bells rang in his head. He didn't like that expression on her. At all.

" _Colonel Jack O'Neill,_ " she said and again her voice had that odd undertone. Jack recognized the voice. Carter's voice sounded exactly like it had done when her body had been taken over by Jolinar. And the walls of the narrow corridor were ricocheting her voice, contorting it even more. It was creepy.

" _What is it, Colonel?_ " Carter asked when he didn't say anything. Slowly she began turning in a circle for him. " _Do you not recognize the body? Or do you not recognize the one inhabiting it?_ "

" _Jack?_ " another voice asked from his radio, this time Daniel. Jack ignored it, his eyes glued to the person in front of him. Jacob had most likely alerted the archaeologist and Teal'c when he hadn't gotten a reaction from Jack, cautioning them to be careful.

For a moment, Jack closed his eyes exhausted.

"Nirrti," he greeted, his voice a mixture of the exhaustion of the past days catching up with him and anger at the mere sight before him.

" _Yes,_ " the Goa'uld affirmed.

"What have you done to Carter?" he hissed infuriated.

" _Isn't it obvious?_ " Nirrti smiled with an arrogant grin Jack wanted so badly to wipe from Carter's face.

He felt like being punched into the stomach. Hard. Jack had thought he would be prepared when they found her given that they had been in this very situation before. Well, he was not. It really was Jolinar all over again. Only worse. Then, they hadn't known much about the Goa'uld and their abilities. They hadn't quite known that it was almost impossible to get those snakes out of a human's head if they wouldn't leave voluntarily. And he hadn't been as attached to his 2IC as he was now…

" _Jack, come in! Jack, are you there?_ " Daniel prodded via radio, sounding worried. Slowly, Jack reached up towards his radio.

A mock look took over Carter's face. " _Do you want to call for your friends?_ " Nirrti asked amused, before continuing almost softly: " _They can't help you anymore._ "

Looking her dead into the eyes, Jack contemplated his situation for a second. He could just tell Daniel what was going on and the archaeologist would come crashing in with the rest in tow as fast as possible. And Jack was certain he could keep Nirrti in check until then. Still, something held him back. Jack knew the situation was fragile, delicate. While he had cornered Nirrti and was standing opposite of Carter, he knew all too well he was still slightly at the disadvantage. Because Nirrti still had complete reign over Carter and having seen all her memories the Goa'uld would know Jack had come to _rescue_ her. Not only to retrieve the body but also the soul originally living in it. So Nirrti had leverage. Leverage Jack didn't want her to have but couldn't do anything against.

Jack's hands itched desperately to go for his zat, to exchange his personal defense weapon for the slightly less lethal stunning gun, because it felt downright wrong to point the weapon at one of his own teammates, but right now his P90 was the only thing what made Jack _almost_ equal to Nirrti, making her treat him seriously and seeing the enemy in him he was. His deadly Tau'ri weapon pointed at her was the only reason Nirrti would feel threatened by him right now and what would make her think twice about her actions in his presence. Then again, given the leverage she had Jack was sure Nirrti still felt triumphant despite standing practically in front of his weapon's muzzle. And adding the rest of his team would change all that. Right now they had some weird sort of balance between them, both of them assured enough of their own power and control over the situation to not attack immediately and it was what Jack needed. He was out to capture Nirrti after all, so having to shoot her in self-defense wasn't an outcome he liked to provoke.

So Jack realized he was better off being on his own. Yes, his team's backup would have surely helped in some way or another, but it wasn't what he needed right now. He needed to take Nirrti by surprise and this was best to be done when she still felt herself in superior control. Jack ached from the thought of having to face Nirrti alone while she was still parading around in Carter's body but what choice did he actually have?

The Goa'uld still looked at him, patiently, expectantly, trying to judge mildly amused what he was going to do. Jack looked right back, unwavering, smiled, and then switched off his radio for good.

* * *

 _A/N: I feel the need to apologize for errors again. I'm sick again (or still?) and proofreading and reworking was an exhausting effort I struggled with. But I still wanted to keep my promise of faster updates, so I'm just hoping this makes some sense..._


	25. Begging

_**Author's note:**_ _So, the following chapter is one of my all-time favorites in Beyond Reason – and not only because it has two of my most favorite lines in it. It's a chapter I like as much as I dislike it sometimes. And it was planned out entirely different. Still, somehow it has totally grown on me…_

 _Again, thanks to all readers, followers and reviewers for your support!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Five – Begging_

Jack looked at the person in front of him that had once been the woman he loved. Now it was merely a shell of her, her body walking and talking, but there was nothing left over of her. Her eyes didn't hold that certain sparkle anymore, were void of her spirit. All her expressions were wrong, looking all out of place on her familiar, beautiful face. Her body still moved, but not in the way Jack had seen it move over the years. Everything about her was wrong now. Nothing was left.

Suddenly, Jack remembered Klorel's words, stating with Ska'ara's voice that nothing of the host survives. Jack wanted to scream, wanted to kick something in frustration, wanted to cry. Fate really was a twisted bitch. Why her? Why _now_? Was that the punishment for him wanting to take their relationship further? Why was it that whenever he tried to take his chance at being happy something had to come along to destroy it? Was he destined to stay alone? Was that what fate was trying to tell him?

He almost snorted. Clearly fate could have found another way to tell him hands off of Carter than turning her into a Goa'uld? But who was he kidding? This had nothing to do with him. He was just the one suffering from it. Aside from Carter herself, of course.

God, Carter! How must she be feeling now? Did she still feel anything at all?

Pain cut through Jack like a knife. Seeing her like this was worse than anything he had imagined she could be going through. Not that he had actually allowed himself to think of it. He had pretty much buried himself in work these last days, trying to ban all thoughts of her to have a clear head. And whenever there had been nothing for him to do, he had worked out in the gym. Preferably with Teal'c, when the Jaffa had been present. The hard training sessions had also managed to push back his tremendous feeling of guilt. Working out until you couldn't stand upright anymore or getting a thorough beating from Teal'c had felt like an adequate punishment. Now, seeing Carter, Jack felt it hadn't been enough. He had failed her. He had promised her he would stay by her side, that he would go through that with her. And the next moment he took his eyes off her, she'd been captured once again. He should have never let her out of his sight, even if he knew that that was a ridiculous thought the moment it crossed his mind. Carter was no woman you kept an eye on. And normally, she also didn't need it. He'd just made the mistake to assume it was the same the one time she'd been physically and mentally vulnerable.

"God, Carter…" Jack murmured, looking at her, frozen in his tracks.

" _Not anymore,_ " the Goa'uld contradicted and if Jack didn't know it any better he would have said the snake was enjoying the torture it inflicted on him. Again, anger surged through him, hot and burning.

"Fight it, Carter!" he demanded. His dark eyes bored into her cold blue ones, trying to will _her_ to see him, to hear him. To understand him.

" _She can't hear you anymore,_ " Nirrti taunted him with Carter's warped voice.

Jack refused to believe that. There had to be something left over of her. They had rescued Ska'ara, so there was still hope left for the host. And Carter wouldn't just disappear. She wouldn't just leave.

"Fight it, Carter! I know, you can!" he insisted, while trying his best to not think of the possibility that Nirrti might have taken her by surprise. Did it make a difference if you knew you were going to be taken over by a Goa'uld? Ska'ara had known he would be turned into a host, so maybe this was why they had gotten him back in the end? Had he managed to resist somehow because he had been aware what was going to happen? Had Carter known? Had she been aware of what was going to happen to her? Did she have to suffer through the knowledge that soon she would host the enemy and betray her friends, her family, her planet?

"C'mon Carter, don't leave me hangin' here…" Jack almost pleaded, hoping against hope for some sign from _her_.

Nirrti began tapping Carter's foot on the ground. " _I really wouldn't have pegged you for the emotional type,_ " the Goa'uld said bored.

Then, slowly, she raised Carter's hand and immediately Jack had his weapon raised high, the safety off and the muzzle pointing at his former 2IC. The hand device glowed softly on Carter's hand but Nirrti didn't activate it, yet.

" _Did you know that with her powers I can make that hurt so much more?_ " Nirrti asked almost softly.

"Her powers?" Jack echoed. His finger was placed firmly against the trigger and his eyes fixated a point on Carter's chest where her bare skin was exposed by the top's material. He would only need one shot. But could he really do it?

" _Well, why do you think I took Major Carter with me?_ " Nirrti asked patiently.

"Her better looks?" Jack smirked.

Nirrti narrowed Carter's eyes, leaving her with an angry expression that still looked nothing like Carter's usual anger. And Jack would have known. He had been on the receiving end a few times.

" _No, you insolent fool!_ " the Goa'uld spat. " _What do you humans use your eyes for? How can you not have noticed her tremendous powers?_ "

"Well, we _humans_ normally pay more attention to the person itself," Jack answered.

Nirrti raised Carter's eyebrows to look arrogant, which worked pretty well given that Jack had never before seen a similar expression on his 2IC. " _Well, I probably should not complain,_ " Nirrti contemplated. " _Because after all, your ignorance has given me the perfect host. The Hok'tar I have been searching for. Her powers are overwhelming. And while she couldn't, I have full control over them. Now I'll truly be the God I was destined to be!_ "

"Yeah, and others would simply call you a nutcase," Jack couldn't help himself. It probably wasn't his smartest idea to insult the person pointing a dangerous weapon at him, but the mere fact that she was using Carter was enough to make his blood boil and his head short-circuit. He wasn't thinking as clearly as he probably would have liked.

" _They won't mock me any longer,_ " Nirrti whispered. Then baby blue eyes narrowed on Jack, the gaze turning calculating. Carter put her free hand to her hip and tilted her head to the side. Jack had to suppress shivers that threatened to overcome him. Seeing her move and talk without being really her was eerie at best.

" _Did you know that she was waiting for you?_ " the Goa'uld asked quietly. " _She was so convinced you would come. For her._ "

The words immediately had the intended effect. Jack felt like being stabbed with a knife, literally hurting. His heart and chest constricted painfully, even though he paid special attention to the fact that he was not letting anything show on the outside.

God, Carter…

Of course. Of course he would come for her. He always would, wherever she was. When she would need him, he would come for her.

"I'm here, Carter…" he whispered, not noticing that he had actually said it out loud, until he heard his own voice utter the words.

" _Yes, you are,_ " Nirrti agreed smug. " _But you are too late. She is long gone. So she will never know._ "

No, this couldn't be true. Jack refused to believe that this was it. There had to be something he could still do for her. Something had to be left over of her. Jack had never believed in praying. If anything his job had shown him that there was no God out there. But this here got him damn near trying anyway.

"Fight it, Carter!" he barked, out of desperation. "That's an order, Major!"

Nirrti opened Carter's mouth, probably to mock him a bit more, when he suddenly saw her body go rigid. She tensed up completely, a surprised expression taking over her face. Equally surprised, Jack watched. Could it be? Had her body habitually reacted to his order? Carter had been his 2IC for years and they had gone through hell together, so maybe she had recognized his command on some instinctual level?

"Fight her, Sam!" he called out to her. "Come on, you can do it! Fight, Sam!"

All of a sudden, Carter's body seized. A strangled half-cry with her warped voice escaped her before her breath got stuck in her throat and then she collapsed. Fear and worry immediately gripped Jack's heart with an iron fist and only his thorough training ensured that he stayed at his safe distance, weapon still pointed at her, when all he wanted to do was to rush to her side and check if she was okay.

Heavy gasping filled the sudden silence while Jack closely observed her body on the ground before him. And then he realized it wasn't only his breath. Her breathing had quickened, too.

And then she straightened herself up again, getting to her knees with shaky, unstable movements. She looked up at him and suddenly, Jack saw the familiar feeling in her eyes. Promptly he lowered his weapon, letting the P90 fall secured against his chest, before he was on his knees next to her.

"Sam…?" he asked, slightly insecure.

She gazed right back at him, her expression beaten, tired and exhausted, but so _her_ , Jack felt like crying out in relief.

"S-sir…" she whispered.

Before he had realized what he'd done, Jack had reached out and gripped her shoulders, pulling her closer to him, holding on to her tightly. The only thing that prevented him from hauling her into his arms completely was the tiny detail that she still carried a Goa'uld in her body, was still merged with the enemy. However, even from the small distance separating them, Jack was immediately assaulted with her typical scent. She still smelled the same. It was strangely relieving.

"God, Carter!" he whispered, fighting the emotions that threatened to overtake him.

"Sir… I don't… have much time," she said, slowly and controlled as if she had to press out every word. Her hand pushed against his chest, trying to bring more distance between them, but the movement was weak as if she wasn't really attempting it or failed to put any force into it.

"I am… I'm fighting her," Sam explained and Jack leaned back to study her expression.

"She… is strong," Sam rasped. Jack could see the strain it put on her to fight back the Goa'uld that demanded complete possession of her body.

"You are stronger," Jack encouraged.

Sam managed a smile, but it was broken, exhausted. "Sir, I can't… no more."

"Don't give up, Sam," he insisted.

She shook her head. "Sir, I've been fighting her for days!" she said, suddenly rushed as if she had to hurry. "She was trying to get information. On my powers. On yours. On Earth and our allies. On everything we've learned about the System Lords."

"I know," he admitted. "We were there, when… Nirrti met with Ba'al. We heard the conversation."

Her eyes grew astonished. "I didn't know," she said.

"SG-1 was there," Jack explained. "But we couldn't get you out with that much Jaffa around. I'm sorry."

She shook her head slightly, only the barest hint of a movement. "No, it's alright, sir. I understand."

"Since then we are preparing for the worst case," he stated.

"That's good, but until now Nirrti hasn't gained any information from me," Sam revealed.

Jack raised an eyebrow in astonishment. "What do you mean?"

Sam inhaled deeply, before she answered: "I've managed to shield my memory. With my powers, I hid whatever I could from Nirrti so she doesn't really know anything yet. But I'm getting exhausted…"

As if on cue, Sam trailed off mid-sentence. She still looked at Jack but for a moment, her eyes glazed over and grew distant. Panicking that he would lose her, Jack cupped her cheeks with his large hands, pulling her face to his.

"Stay with me, Carter!" he commanded.

Again, she returned to him. "Sir, she wants to use my powers to overthrow the System Lords and then she will attack Earth, the Tok'ra and the Asgard! She wants to take over Earth, the Milky Way, the galaxies… She will truly make herself a goddess."

Jack almost cursed but held back just in time. Nevertheless, he carefully filed away the information, just in case they'd need it sometime.

"She won't succeed," Jack assured her. "We will find a way to stop her."

Sam shook her head again, moving his hands with her. "Sir, you need to stop _me_!" she clarified.

Jack knew immediately what she meant, what she was asking him to do. His eyes narrowed dangerously, his jaw working, but he didn't say anything.

"Sir, please," she pleaded. "I know too much! Nirrti can't ever know what I know!"

"She won't, Carter," he promised. "Just hang in there a bit more. We'll get you to the Tok'ra and they will get the snake out of your head."

At least, he hoped that.

"No, sir," she denied. "It's too late. I'm exhausted. I can't fight her any longer. I'm barely holding on right now!"

"But you did well, Carter! Just a little longer!"

"I can't," Sam whispered, her eyes begging him to understand. "It's taking all my last strength to speak with you. When I finally lose control, I _will_ vanish. She will take over completely. And she will know. Everything."

Jack closed his eyes for a moment, pain flashing through him once more. Her words stabbed his heart like knives. "Don't do this to me, Carter…" he murmured.

"Sir, this is the last chance we have!" she continued. "Take it! Stop me!"

He opened his eyes again, looking at her. The pain he imagined was written all over his face clearly reflected from hers.

"Carter…" he began, unsure what he really was going to say when he heard himself mutter: "Not again."

It was the entity all over again. Then Sam had been a threat to the base, now she was a threat to various galaxies! He knew what he had to do. He knew what he needed to do. What numerous worlds and planet needed him to do. What _she_ needed him to do. But he didn't want to do it.

With the entity, Jack had only had seconds to react, so he had done what had been necessary, knowing she would have done the same. Still, it had practically killed him. Shooting her, knowing that he was giving her a lethal dose, and then watching her body wither in the hospital bed had slowly killed him inside. He knew he had had no other choice. Still he had hated his course of action with surprising force. The picture of her body falling to the ground, the zat's blue energy dancing around her unmoving frame still haunted him in his nightmares. It had been what had him ultimately put more distance between them. The entity had singled Carter out, because she'd been 'important'. Jack was sure that the entity had seen what was between them. It had deemed Jack a danger and so it had chosen the one person it believed he could never hurt as a shield: Carter. Carter had been his Achilles heel, his weak point, and the entity had explored it mercilessly. His feelings had effectively put her in the direct line of danger. The entity had specifically chosen her. Because of him. So Jack had done what he should have done long before. He had put his personal feelings aside and done what his country and his job expected him to do. For the lives of uncountable people, he had shot her. He had killed one of the people that mattered most to him. And he would do it all over again if he needed to. But that didn't mean he hadn't hated and regretted every second of it. The simple thought of a life without Carter left him feeling hollow and empty.

She had never reproached him for it. In fact, Jack was sure, she _understood_. She had even tried to talk about it with him, had tried to tell him she didn't blame him. He'd wished uncountable times, she _would_ accuse him. He had wanted her to scream at him at the top of her lungs. _He_ blamed himself. So to be presented with her anger would have somehow helped him more than her understanding. He knew logically that she tried to help him, tried to help him through the trauma he had inflicted on himself. But her readiness to forgive him only made him feel worse.

So, having lastly no place to go with his emotions anymore, he'd used his own hatred, the anger he felt for himself and for what he'd done – what he had needed to do – to lash out and push her away from him. The entity had made it clear for him what he was doing to her with his 'secret' feelings. He had never wanted for her to go through something like that again. And he had never wanted to be faced with such a decision again. Jack knew it had been pure luck, a coincidence, that had brought her back to him and that he wouldn't get that lucky a second time.

And here they were. The same situation all over again.

He had failed to protect her from the looming danger and now he was paying the price. She was practically begging him to end her life. Again.

"Sam… I can't…" he whispered, his voice breaking.

No, that wasn't right, he realized. He knew he could. He knew he _would_. He had done it once, he would do it again. It would kill him having to go through all the misery once again, but he would do the _right_ thing. Even if he didn't want to.

And she knew it, too. "Sir, you have no other choice," she said softly.

He looked at her, his eyes searching her face. Now he felt as exhausted as she looked. "Sam…" he murmured.

"I'm so sorry, sir," she answered, managing a small smile for him. With shaky movements, she reached up and laid her hands over his. He could feel the tremble racking them, reminding him that their time was running out. Any moment now she could lose the fight and Nirrti could take over once more.

"I want you to know… that I… understand," she said concentrated.

Then she unsteadily scrambled to her feet. Jack steadied her as best as possible, even though she still had her hands on his on her cheeks, keeping them in place. She panted heavily once she had managed to get upright, the exertion being too much for her. Jack stepped closer, running his fingers over her cheeks soothingly without noticing.

"Sam," he began once more, but she interrupted him.

Suddenly, she leaned forwards and before Jack could react, he felt her lips against his own. He had kissed her before so he noticed instantly that her lips felt cold to the touch. He wanted to react, but before his brain had caught on and made him respond to her, she had already pulled back.

"I love you, sir," she whispered.

Jack's eyebrows shot up, shocked and surprised, and he opened his mouth to say something, anything, even if he had no idea, what. But before he got the chance, Sam's eyes flashed visibly and the Goa'uld took over once again.

Immediately, Jack was greeted with the cold, arrogant look of Nirrti on Sam's face. He reacted instinctively. While Nirrti blinked confused, obviously quite irritated what had happened when she had never lost control over a host before, Jack's hand reached down to the Berretta strapped to his thigh. He had the weapon's safety off, the finger at the trigger and the muzzle pushed against Carter's forehead, before Nirrti was able to react.

"Don't move," Jack ordered.

He knew he should pull the trigger and he should do it now, as long as he still had the chance. He bent the finger placed firmly on the trigger, but didn't put enough force into it to shoot. Yet.

Nirrti had the guts to chuckle. " _Foolish human,_ " she said with Carter's warped voice. " _Your weapon cannot harm me._ "

"I beg to differ," Jack contradicted. "From the way I see it, my bullet can't miss you and I'm sure it will cause some damage in your brain."

" _Your bullet wouldn't even touch me,_ " Nirrti answered.

"I don't miss," he insisted. "And certainly not from such a distance."

" _Your bullet wouldn't even touch me,_ " Nirrti repeated, all self-assured and amused.

"That's pretty impossible with the muzzle pressed right against your forehead," Jack stated.

" _My powers will prevent it,_ " she said confidently.

"What powers?" he inquired. "Your shield won't work, I'm too close already. And if you even think of making yourself invisible, I _will_ shoot."

She still smiled haughtily.

Suddenly, Jack felt energy press against him. Like furious gusts of wind, the energy blew into his face and against his body, trying to push him away from her. Nirrti had activated Carter's psychic abilities! Jack gritted his teeth and pushed his legs into the ground with all his strength to withstand the power lashing out at him. He felt his healing powers curing small cuts and bruises where the pure energy cut into his flesh, but he paid it no mind. He concentrated on enduring the brutal power of the energy she threw into his face. His whole body tensed up as he was determined to not give an inch and he tried his best to ignore the pain tingling all over his body. God, Carter really wielded incredible power, he realized.

Finally, the energy died down. Jack panted.

Carter's face looked at him with a downright shocked and bewildered expression, her mouth half-opened, but speechless. Nirrti had obviously expected to throw him halfway across the hallway, but he had withstood. Barely, but he'd managed. And she had obviously anticipated to not be greeted with his gun anymore, but the muzzle was still pushed firmly against her head.

"You know what's the downside of any powers?" Jack said, breathing heavily. "There's always someone, who's stronger. And Carter knew this. She knew I would be strong enough to stop you. This was why she waited for me to come."

Nirrti scowled at him, but she didn't do anything. Or that what was Jack thought.

Suddenly she raised her hand, the hand device on it glowing fiercely. Immediately the Colonel understood. She wanted to use the device to reinforce her blows!

Jack gritted his teeth in concentration. Shit! What to do? He had no idea if he could withstand the combined power of Carter's psychic abilities _and_ the hand device! And he only had this chance! If he wanted to erase the threat Nirrti certainly posed, then he had to shoot her, while he still could.

The glowing hand device hit him with a strike that felt suspiciously like a truck smashing into his chest at full speed. All air was pressed from Jack's lungs and he grimaced in pain. His arm swayed and then Jack collapsed, knowing immediately that the force of Nirrti's attack was about to throw him backwards through the hallway. With a last, frantic, instinctive reaction, he pulled the trigger, hoping he'd still managed in time. A shot rang out in the half-dark before Jack was flung away, sliding several feet over the stone ground before a wall connecting with his back stopped him. Jack groaned out loud when pain exploded in his beaten body, but immediately his healing powers were on the task, he could feel it.

With dots swimming in front of his vision, the Colonel carefully sat up. For a moment everything around him turned before he managed to right the world in front of his eyes once more. With one hand he reached out and felt over the back of his head. This would leave a bump, he feared.

With a grumble, Jack got to his feet and looked over to where Carter had stood. She didn't stand there anymore. Shocked, Jack noticed that she had fallen. Her body lay unmoving with a puddle of blood slowly spreading beneath her.

He'd shot her. Actually, it shouldn't surprise him as much as it did. He remembered the clear sound of the shot and he certainly hadn't aimed his shot to miss the target. With almost routinely movements Jack raised the hand that held his Berretta. He secured the weapon and then gingerly touched the muzzle. It was still warm.

Jack stashed the weapon away, feeling suddenly all alone in the long hallway.

He had shot Carter. Again.

He had killed her.

* * *

 _ **A/N:**_ _I always wondered why Nirrti was searching for a Hok'tar if she really had no political ambitions whatsoever. For pure scientific reasons? I thought that pretty shallow given that the Goa'uld are already nearly immortal with their host-hopping. So why go through all the trouble if you don't intend to use your superior host for something big?_


	26. Deceiving

_**Author's note:**_ _Of course I'm not gonna leave you all hanging over Christmas! And since where I live, Christmas is celebrated on the 24th, I kinda had to rush to get the chapter ready today, because otherwise I'll seriously lack the time. So, hope you all enjoy the search and rescue mission and thank you all for your support._

 _Have a nice Christmas everyone!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Six – Deceiving_

Jack rushed over to Carter's still body, his long legs eating up the distance between them with a few strides. He braked down next to her and fell to his knees at her side. He didn't know what he was hoping for: that she was alive or that she was dead. He needed her to be dead and he wanted her to be alive.

"Sam…!" he whispered, tortured by the thought of what he'd just done.

Her eyes were closed, her body motionless.

Jack had struck her chest, where he had aimed when he'd been thrown off, but not as he had intended. The force of her blow had thwarted him and the bullet had buried itself right under her left collarbone at an awkward angle and then had gone straight up, emerging through her neck. Blood spilled from the tiny holes with a frightening pace, flowing down her collarbone and her chest, tainting her pale skin. Jack had seen enough wounds like that to know it had hit her lung, and maybe a few arteries. A worrisome injury, but for a Goa'uld not necessarily lethal.

And as if to prove his thoughts, Carter coughed and opened her eyes. Nirrti's enraged gaze bored into Jack, her voice and body shaking under the pain she had to be in.

" _How dare you…!_ " she hissed.

Jack pulled his faithful weapon again and pointed it at her. "I'm not done, yet," he said coldly.

" _You're killing me!_ " she said shocked.

"That was the whole purpose," he answered.

" _What about your Major?_ " Nirrti wanted to know.

If she only was his, Jack thought.

"Collateral damage," he simply stated.

Nirrti's eyes flashed threateningly, but Jack didn't bat an eye. On the outside, he gave his all to appear calm and calculating, but on the inside, he was a mess of feelings. This was the moment that counted. His plan – if you could even call that a plan – had been a hasty decision and was far from flawless, but with a bit luck…?

Come on, Nirrti, he pushed inwardly. Take the bait!

Jack switched off the safety of his weapon and bent his finger around the trigger, taking careful and obvious aim at Carter's head. Her blue eyes looked up at him and even though it was Nirrti's calculating gaze within them, it actually hurt Jack. Praying that he wouldn't make the biggest mistake in his whole life, Jack shot again.

The bullet embedded into the stony floor.

With catlike, fast movements Carter had shot up and grabbed him at the jacket, her hands holding him with the surprising strength of the Goa'uld dictating her movements. Her eyes flashed dangerously and then her mouth opened. Still trying to follow her fast moves, it was all Jack could do to avert his head. Something slimy, slippery hit his cheek and with a bloodcurdling screech Jack felt it wriggle towards his neck. Cursing, he reached up, grabbed the Goa'uld and ripped it away from his neck. Immediately, pain shot through his neck and he felt a warm liquid trail down his spine. Shit, the parasite had already managed to burrow into his skin! Jack pulled the Goa'uld forwards and assured himself that nothing of it had managed to get under his skin, literally. Nirrti shrieked at him offended, but she was all there.

Phew, Jack thought with a racing heart. Close call!

He had speculated on the fact that if Carter's body was damaged beyond anything the Goa'uld could repair while he was still a vivid threat to its survival, it would try to switch hosts, going for the intact human: him. After all, then Nirrti had him under control and could take her time healing Carter before switching back to her body, maybe giving Jack a fatal wound before she left so he couldn't ever be a threat to her anymore. Easy for the Goa'uld and effective. So Jack had actually hoped for this to happen. But he had severely underestimated the Goa'uld's speed and had almost let himself get taken over by the snake. And then Carter would have been a goner!

The Goa'uld wriggled in Jack's hand and he felt his grip on the slimy creature slip. Before he would lose hold of the parasite, Jack threw the Goa'uld away and fired a vague shot after her, daring her to come anywhere near him and Carter. The Goa'uld screeched offended, but the crawling sounds stayed somewhere in the darkness of the hallway.

Nevertheless, Jack kept a firm grip on his weapon, even while he reached out blindly for where Carter had collapsed without the Goa'uld to keep her alive. His hand touched her still warm body and he concentrated on his healing powers, trying to give her enough strength to survive until he could get her to Fraiser. Jack had no idea if he was succeeding though. He couldn't really concentrate on her with the looming threat of the Goa'uld somewhere around them and he was acutely aware that time was running out with every passing second.

Carter didn't react to his touch or the energy he felt disappearing into her body. She didn't say anything, her body didn't move. Jack tried his best to not see that as a bad sign.

When he estimated he'd given her enough energy to stabilize her for the moment, he stashed his weapon away, secured of course. It wouldn't do to shoot his own leg in their current situation. Immediately, he felt naked, exposed.

Jack grabbed Carter's arm and heaved her up, leaning her body onto his. Half-dragging her, he made his way down the dark hallway, his steps followed by the echo of the crawling Goa'uld. Jack's eyes swiveled around unstopping, in case Nirrti tried to attack another time. He still had a hand free to grab his P90 and he certainly had no scruple to shoot the snake. He should have done that before, but Carter's rescue had been more important, and now the snake wisely stayed out of his reach.

Finally, Jack arrived at the door leading from the narrow hallway into the entrance room and without a care for stealth, he threw it open and hurried into the adjoining room. He walked right into the arms of a Jaffa patrol.

Jack froze when he saw himself confronted with two Jaffa, who seemed equally surprised at his sight. Jack cursed himself inwardly. Daniel and Teal'c had mentioned Jaffa on this level, so why hadn't he been more careful? The Jaffa instantly raised their staff weapons at him, yelling something in Goa'uld. Jack didn't have Daniel's talent for languages but he had heard these words often enough to know what they meant: stay where you are or we'll shoot.

Jack did as ordered, his brain racing how he could get them out of this mess. Time was ticking and pressured Jack. He felt Carter's slack body weigh him down and her blood flow down the side of his BDUs.

The Jaffa closed in on him and again, Jack heard the shuffling of the Goa'uld behind him in the dark hallway. Time was running out for the snake, too, he realized. It could survive for some time without a host, this much Jack knew, but how long exactly? How desperate would Nirrti be for a host? Would she attack them again, now that her Jaffa had them secured?

Then, all of a sudden, a familiar sound rang out. Jack's head shot up. Zats!

To his astonishment however, the blue energy danced over the two Jaffa, causing them to collapse noiselessly. Jack looked around. From another hallway, from behind the cover of a door, stepped Jacob and Fraiser. Jacob held his zat raised, while the Doc had a firm grip on her Berretta, covering the former General. Oh, for cryin' out loud, Jack had probably never been so glad to see the Tok'ra and the Doctor.

"Talk about timing…" he murmured.

"Sam!" Jacob shouted surprised when he saw his daughter hang from her Commanding Officer's shoulder.

Jack shook his head at the other man. "Fraiser," he called out, before he made a few wary steps away from the door. The Doctor was at his side instantly, checking Carter out. Jack held her upright while gazing at Jacob over her head.

"What's happened?" Jacob inquired confused.

"Long story," Jack cut him off. "I'll tell you once we've gotten back."

"She's losing much blood," Janet reported grimly. "We have to get her back to the SGC."

Jack nodded and reached for his radio. "Daniel? Teal'c? Return! Immediately!" he ordered, before he switched to another channel, so all his men could hear him. "To all SG teams, this is Colonel O'Neill. Return immediately to the Stargate Center! I repeat, immediate return!"

One after the other, all SG team leaders reported back, confirming the order. Only a second or two later, Daniel and Teal'c stormed from their corridor, Daniel looking something between worried sick and angry beyond words. He stormed for Jack, but when he saw Sam hanging from his shoulder, all accusations seemed to die in his throat. He seemed to want to run for his friend, but just like Jacob he had to stay back to give Janet space to work.

Teal'c stepped up to Jack. "Nirrti?" he asked.

Jack motioned to the dark corridor behind him. "Crawling somewhere over there in the dark," he answered.

Daniel looked at the ground uneasily as if he expected to step onto the snake suddenly. Teal'c merely nodded. "Then Major Carter is freed. This is good news."

Yeah, Jack thought grimly. At least, he had freed her. She might die, until they'd gotten her any help, but at least she would die as herself. Get a grip, O'Neill, he demanded of himself angrily. How about a little bit optimism.

Fraiser stepped back. "I can't do anymore for her, here," she said, swiping a hand over her forehead.

Immediately Daniel and Jacob crowded in on them but Sam was still unconscious, staying oblivious to their presence. Jacob stepped up and pulled Sam's other arm over his shoulder, helping Jack to carry her weight. Daniel came to Jack, offering to take over. "Let me take her," he suggested.

Janet however shook her head. "No offense, Daniel, but if I am correct, then the Colonel is still healing Sam, so I think he should stay close to her," she explained.

Surprised, the Colonel looked at her. He was? How come he wasn't aware?

He looked down onto the blond crown of Carter's hair, where her head had slumped forwards. He really wasn't consciously trying to heal her anymore but now that he concentrated on it, he could feel the small trickle of energy that leaked from him over to her. He narrowed his eyes. Was he unconsciously healing her or had her powers latched on to him in a desperate attempt to save her life? Well, whatever it was, it was okay for him. As long as it would keep her alive…

"Okay, then let's go!" Jack ordered and cautiously, they began to make their way up towards the exit. Teal'c took lead, clearing their way, prepared to do so with his staff weapon if necessary. Jack and Jacob followed with Sam between them and Daniel and Janet brought up the rear, Janet's watchful eyes glued to the Major while Daniel covered their six. But they didn't encounter anyone.

When they made their way down the palace's steps, they ran into SG-3. Colonel Reynolds took only one look at the slumped form of Carter between them and ordered his men to guard them. Together, they made their way back to the Stargate as fast as possible. They had needed hours to get to the palace but then they had tried for stealth and had been unsure of the way. Now they would probably only need half the time, even if that would still make it hours.

From time to time, Janet called for stops to check on Sam and, Jack feared, to give him some time to recover. It took quite a toll on his body to heal Carter and drag her to the Stargate, even if Jacob helped carry her, but Jack was far from admitting that.

When they had crossed about half the distance, Jack ordered the teams to take a ten minute break. Their walk was brisk and the mood tense. They had gotten far enough away from the palace to be relatively safe and they still had quite some distance ahead of them.

Jack carefully lowered himself to the ground, pulling Carter down with him. Jacob let her arm slowly slide down and then sat down next to them. Jack was mildly astonished that the Tok'ra didn't comment that Sam was now leaning against the Colonel's side, her head resting on his shoulder, but who was he to drag Jacob's attention to that?

Janet checked Carter out again and she seemed pretty content. "Good work, Colonel," she praised. "Her lung is intact and healed from what I can tell. I think the most we have to worry about is the blood loss."

Jacob exhaled relieved and clapped a hand on Jack's free shoulder. "Thank you, Jack. I owe you," he murmured.

"You don't," Jack said. He certainly hadn't done it for Jacob.

Daniel and Teal'c walked over to them and sat down around them, Daniel behind Sam and Teal'c in front of them.

"How's she doing?" Daniel asked immediately.

"Fraiser says, she's fine," Jack reported. "Just a bit light on the blood."

And as if to confirm his words, Sam stirred against his shoulder. A small sound escaped her throat and then Jack felt her head move.

"Dad…?" Sam whispered confused upon catching sight of the Tok'ra and Jack almost howled out loud relieved. It was her voice! The voice he would recognize under thousand others. The voice he had listened to almost daily for the last years. It was her voice and her voice alone.

"Sammie!" Jacob said surprised and almost jumped forwards. The former General reached out, laying both hands on her cheeks, but he didn't move her away from Jack. Sam reached up and laid her fingers on her father's hands, smiling back to the big grin she found herself confronted with.

"What's happened?" Sam asked disorientated.

"Later, kiddo," her father promised. "We have to get you back to the SGC first."

Sam looked around confused, but she didn't ask further. When she glanced around, she locked gazes with Teal'c.

"It is good to have you back, Major Carter," the Jaffa smiled earnestly.

Sam smiled back. "Yeah, it's good to be back, Teal'c," she answered.

Jacob shuffled back and immediately, Daniel was at her side, hugging her from behind and laying his head carefully onto her free shoulder. "God, Sam…!" he breathed out, relieved beyond words.

She reached up and stroked her fingers through his hair reassuringly. "Hi, Daniel," she said and Jack could hear the smile in her words.

"Don't ever do that again!" Daniel ordered.

"I'll try," she promised. "I'm not really keen on it, either."

Satisfied, Daniel moved back. Sam sighed and Jack felt her relax against him. And then he could practically see her slowly become aware of what she was actually leaning against. She turned her head on his shoulder and looked up to him.

"Hey there, Carter," he smiled down on her.

"Hi, sir," she answered. Her blue eyes locked gazes with his and he felt like drowning in her eyes. It was so relieving to see _her_ look back through them. As always, her eyes spoke with him. He could read her desire to speak with him in them, her wish to thank him, her urge to explain. There was so much; so much they had to talk about, so much they both wanted to say. But this was neither the time nor the place – and they both knew.

Unnoticed by the others surrounding them, Jack reached out and laid a hand on her thigh that leaned against his leg. He squeezed it lightly, telling her nonverbally what he couldn't say out loud, and in response she nuzzled into his shoulder, sighing pleased. For a few moments they stayed like that, the sight of them covered by their friends around them, who talked about nothing concrete. Jacob took hold of Sam's hand and from time to time, Daniel would reach out and touch Sam's shoulder, but nobody seemed inclined to comment or change her position leaned against her CO. They all seemed to have gone momentarily blind.

But still, they couldn't stay in their little bubble forever, Jack knew. They still had to cover quite a distance. So he gently untangled himself from Carter and stood up. He held out a hand for her and pulled her to her feet. When she began to sway almost immediately, he and Jacob took positions at her sides once more and with her arms around their shoulders, they once more continued on their way. Reynolds' men guarded them again with Colonel Reynolds and Teal'c clearing their way and Daniel walked behind them, bringing Sam up to date about what had happened in her absence. Sam nodded and replied but mostly her attention seemed occupied with staggering forwards.

With Sam's shaky state they were certainly slower, but with the lead they already had, Jack wasn't too worried.

Finally, they arrived at the Stargate and Jacob and Jack were the first ones to go through with Sam. Jack had never been so glad to be back at the SGC.

Slowly, he and Jacob walked Carter down the ramp to the waiting General Hammond, who looked at them quite surprised. One after the other, Jack heard his men arrive and he saw SG's 15 and 2 stand not far away, waiting for their arrival. The moment Fraiser arrived, she began to call out orders for a medical team, storming over to where they stood with Sam.

"We're back…" Sam whispered, barely audible over the blaring of the alarms and the crackling of the engaged wormhole behind them. Jack heard the relief and the surprise in her voice, telling him she hadn't counted on returning any time soon. He didn't answer but inconspicuously stroked his thumb over her wrist where he held her arm around his shoulders.

General Hammond stepped up to them. "Major Carter," he said, visibly happy and relieved. "It's good to have you back unharmed."

"Thank you, sir," she answered honestly.

The General nodded at Jacob and Jack, and for a moment Jack thought he saw something glittering in the other man's eyes. But he looked completely professional, so maybe it had only been the light? Still, Jack was pretty sure the General would have given in and showed some sign of the familiarity between him and Carter, if he and Jacob wouldn't have blocked any way to get to Carter.

Behind them, the wormhole finally disengaged and silence fell upon the 'Gate room. Jack looked into reassured, glad faces that stared at Carter and realized that SG-1 was far from the only ones who had missed her and prayed for her safe return.

Routinely, Jack looked up to the control room. Sergeants Harriman and Siler sat there, gazing down to them and if he was correct, then Jack saw Lieutenant Simmons, who was standing to the side, wipe away a tear. Agent Barrett also stood there, hands in his pockets, and nodded at Jack with a smile when their eyes met. But the next person Jack laid eyes on left him feeling wary. Senator Kinsey stood next to Agent Barrett, staring down on them with an unreadable expression. What was that slimy weasel of a Senator doing here?

As if to answer his silent question, the Senator turned and headed for the stairs, Barrett hurrying after him. It was the Special Agent however, who reached them first. Extending a hand towards Sam, the Special Agent greeted: "Major Carter, it's nice to see they've gotten you back."

Reluctantly, Jacob let go of his daughter and stepped back a bit to allow the Special Agent to shake her hand when Jack made no move whatsoever to accommodate the other man.

"Um… thank you?" Sam answered confused.

"Oh, please forgive me," he said, picking up on her irritation. "You can't know who I am. Special Agent Malcolm Barrett, NID."

Barrett shot her a wide, outgoing smile that was all teeth and got Jack's hackles to rise. Before he could react in any way however, Kinsey had arrived.

"Major Carter," he curtly acknowledged her. Sam only nodded back.

Then the Senator waved at a few by standing Airmen and the SF's trudged over to them. With an arrogant gesture, Kinsey motioned at Sam and ordered: "Arrest Major Carter."

Stunned silence greeted that statement and Jack couldn't help the instinctive pull with which he drew his 2IC tighter against his side. Was the Senator for real?

" _What?!_ " Daniel and Jacob exploded simultaneously.

"Senator!" General Hammond all but growled threateningly.

The Senator pulled a folded piece of paper from his jacket and gave it to General Hammond. "The orders to put Major Carter under immediate arrest," he said smugly.

The General snatched the paper from the Senator and quickly read it. " _Preventive custody because of being a threat to national, planetary and intergalactic security?_ " General Hammond quoted baffled. "Kinsey, what the hell have you been feeding the Joint Chiefs?"

Kinsey didn't even comment the General's outburst. "So, gentlemen, do your job," he demanded, waving the SF's forward to where Sam stood, completely confused.

Insecure, one of the SF's stepped up to her, reaching for the cable ties attached to his BDUs utility belt, but before he could reach Sam, Jack intercepted him, putting himself between the SF's and Carter.

"Colonel O'Neill!" Kinsey barked enraged. "You're disobeying orders!"

Oh yes, Jack thought heatedly. And if Kinsey continued on like this, he would do even more! Anger raged through the Colonel, bubbling dangerously close to the surface. How dare the Senator! How dare he do that to her after all she'd gone through those last weeks? Jack couldn't even think about it or he would lose it. The urge to physically hurt the Senator was overwhelming and right now only the urge to protect Carter was bigger; big enough for him to forget about the Senator momentarily.

"Step aside!" Kinsey commanded. Jack ignored him, his eyes on the SF's in front of him and Carter. The one closest to them took another step forward and immediately Jack narrowed burning eyes on him.

"You will _not_ touch her," he ordered quietly, his voice full of dark promises if the SF dared to defy him.

"Colonel O'Neill!" Kinsey raged.

"Senator Kinsey!" General Hammond interrupted icily. "You will not dispose of _my_ officers at _my_ base!"

"Sir," Doctor Fraiser cut in like clockwork. "With your permission, I'd like to get Major Carter to the infirmary. She's been injured badly."

The General nodded. Kinsey opened his mouth to object, but the General shot him a withering gaze. "Medical orders trump all other orders," he informed the Senator kindly, but matter-of-factly.

"Then I want guards to accompany them," Kinsey ordered haughtily.

The General didn't even spare him a glance. "There are guards at the infirmary. They can handle the situation just fine," he countered.

Kinsey fumed. "As soon as she is cleared, she _will_ be taken into custody!" he threatened, pointing at Sam.

Jack looked at her. Since his shift in posture, she stood pressed half into his side, half into his chest. She looked totally exhausted and overtaxed with the situation. Dark circles had buried into the skin underneath her eyes and the weight she leaned onto him with told him her last energy was failing her fast.

"We'll see about that," Jack said loud enough for the Senator to hear and he was secretly pleased when one of the Senator's eyebrows began twitching in annoyance.

Janet waved the medical team with the stretcher over that hovered at the blast doors, waiting for their orders. Jack carefully helped his 2IC to climb onto the stretcher and when she was finally able to lie down, she sighed heavily. The moment Jack stepped back, Daniel and Jacob were at her side. Jacob leaned down and whispered something to her to which she nodded, but after a short squeeze to Carter's shoulder, Jacob went to stand with Jack.

"Daniel, Teal'c?" Jack asked, before he motioned towards Carter with his chin. "Accompany her?"

His friends nodded immediately. "What're you gonna do?" Daniel asked quietly.

Jack turned and levelled dark, foreboding eyes on the back of the retreating Senator Kinsey, who followed General Hammond and Agent Barrett up to the briefing room. "Something about _that_!" he spat furiously.

And together with Jacob, he stormed after the men, while Sam was carted to the infirmary. Minutes ago, Jack had believed that nothing could have gotten him away from her side in this situation and now? He was trying to find enough patience within his drained body and mind to not kill a government representative while she had to undergo another examination marathon.

At least, Daniel, Teal'c and Janet were with her, he tried to comfort himself. Her friends were there for her, when he couldn't. Yet again.


	27. Arguing

_**Author's note:**_ _I've been having problems uploading the last days, so I'm a little late posting. As kind of an apology, there'll be two chapters at once._

 _Happy New Year everyone!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Seven – Arguing_

"I want an explanation," General Hammond said strictly.

Jack leaned forwards and placed his intertwined hands on the briefing table. His knuckles turned white with the force he used to keep himself calm and collected. He wanted nothing more than to jump over the table and strangle the good Senator Kinsey, who sat to General Hammond's right, just to swipe that self-satisfied smile off the other man's face. But that wouldn't help Carter, so Jack did his best to reign in his dark persona. No matter how good it might feel, he had to think of her situation first.

"I don't know what I should tell you, General," the Senator answered detached. "I think the orders are clear?"

"How come the Joint Chiefs are of the opinion Major Carter could be a threat to national security?" General Hammond asked patiently. Jack was really impressed that the man managed to stay so calm. He was something like an uncle to Carter and he still managed to stay completely professional where Jack was about to lose it. Had he maybe gotten too close? Nah, Jack decided to blame it all on the exhaustion.

Next to him, Jacob also was the picture-perfect imitation of a former Air Force General. Or rather, Jack noticed at looking closer, that would be Selmak. Apparently the Tok'ra had taken over.

"Because she is," Kinsey answered. "From the report I received she's gotten taken over by a Goa'uld and the vast knowledge the Goa'uld gained through her is endangering not only the United States but the whole world."

Jack tried his best to not bristle at the fact that Kinsey had obviously twisted whatever report he had gotten from Barrett's division, because the Special Agent himself looked downright shocked that his report should be responsible for this outcome, or the fact that Kinsey noticeably only cared about Earth, even if, going by his logic, Carter's knowledge endangered whole races, various planets and multiple galaxies.

"First of all," Jack began, his voice calm and composed, despite the turmoil inside him. "Carter's not possessed by a Goa'uld anymore. And second, the Goa'uld didn't gain any knowledge through her, so Earth and all our allies are safe."

"Oh?" Kinsey asked mildly. "And how would you know she isn't controlled by a Goa'uld anymore? Just because her voice sounds normal? Correct me if I am wrong but what if the Goa'uld's only hiding within her?"

The Senator looked pointedly at Jacob, who obviously still sounded very much like himself despite the Tok'ra within his body.

" _A Goa'uld would never allow the host control over the body in any way,_ " Selmak explained detached, a simple statement. " _In contrast to a coexistence with a Tok'ra, the possession by a Goa'uld cannot be hidden. Once the Goa'uld takes over, the host is suppressed._ "

"And I know she's not possessed," Jack agreed. "I got the Goa'uld out of her!"

"Maybe you could tell us what has happened, Colonel?" General Hammond asked.

With short explanations, Jack described what had happened on PG9-7Z5. Again, he conveniently forgot to mention anything about his or Carter's powers and instead gave all the credit for Carter's survival to Fraiser's medical skills. If anything, Kinsey was the last person he wanted to have any knowledge of that.

When he ended, silence fell between the assembled men. Jacob and General Hammond seemed content with the outcome and Agent Barrett looked stunned. Jack wondered idly, if the man was maybe new to the whole alien-encounter-job. He didn't seem very familiar with the whole stuff.

Kinsey however seemed peeved. "And you let the Goa'uld escape?" he said. "Isn't it obvious what will happen? She will just possess one of her Jaffa and get herself a new host! She'll still be a threat to Earth!"

The Senator was right, this much Jack knew. But first of all, he'd known that already and secondly, he really didn't need to be told by a bureaucrat who was leading a fine, lazy life in debauchery in far-away-and-safe Washington DC!

"The Colonel did the right thing considering the situation," General Hammond declared. "He saved the life of a fellow officer, another human."

"Yes, of course," Kinsey said. "I'm sure saving Major Carter will make the important difference in the grand scheme."

Jack's hands twitched and he pressed them further together. What was the man's problem? What had Carter ever done to deserve this treatment and the fair Senator's wrath? Had she even ever met the Senator? Jack had no idea. But maybe this wasn't about her? Maybe this was Kinsey's way to get back at the Stargate Program he so despised. Maybe this was his way for punishing Jack and General Hammond, who'd gotten in his way more than once. Now Jack was even more determined to get Carter out of this. She shouldn't have to bear the brunt of the backlash his amicable way with the higher-ups had gotten onto them.

"Doctor Fraiser will determine for sure if there's still a Goa'uld within Major Carter, but I am inclined to believe Colonel O'Neill's words and say there won't," General Hammond ended the discussion matter-of-factly.

"Still!" the Senator insisted. "The enemy has gotten sensitive knowledge through Major Carter! At least she should be court-martialed for this!"

Jack almost exploded at that. " _What?_ " he shouted enraged.

"I believe this is standard operation procedure in the military for giving information to the enemy?" Kinsey smiled, pleased that he'd gotten that reaction from Jack.

Growling inwardly, Jack desperately clawed at his last bits of self-control. No way would he give the Senator the satisfaction to have gotten to him!

"It is, in case the information is given out of free will," General Hammond said. "But Major Carter had no choice. She certainly couldn't resist."

"Well, that's too bad," Kinsey said. "But I'm not sure if that flimsy excuse of her being out of control will be enough to spare her a court-martial."

Jack gnawed on his cheek, hard enough for it to hurt quite a bit. "The Goa'uld didn't gain any knowledge through her!" he repeated.

"And you know that how?" Kinsey turned to him.

"Carter told me," Jack said.

"Of course she did," Kinsey answered scoffing. "And she couldn't just have tried to do some damage control or tried to save herself, could she?"

Jack felt offended in Carter's stead. She wasn't like that! If _anything_ had happened they needed to know, that would endanger them, the SGC or Earth in _any_ way, then she would have told him immediately!

"Senator!" he growled. "Do you really think that if the Goa'uld had all that knowledge about us Carter has, they wouldn't be here already, conquering the human race? Why should they wait for us to prepare, before they'd rage war on us, if they had all the keys to our annihilation?"

Kinsey shrugged disinterested. "Who knows how Goa'uld are thinking?"

" _The Tok'ra know,_ " Selmak interjected. " _Colonel O'Neill is right. If the Goa'uld would have all that knowledge, they would have already begun an offensive. They would have struck while you were still unsuspecting._ "

Kinsey only smiled lenient, as if Jacob was only defending his daughter and not giving a founded explanation.

"Still, knowledge that might or not might have traded hands is a bit shaky for a reason to arrest one of my officers," General Hammond decided. "The best I hear are speculations."

Kinsey bristled at that. "General, you can't let her run around freely after she has been contaminated by the enemy!"

"What exactly of 'she isn't possessed anymore' did you _not_ understand, Kinsey?" Jack burst out furiously.

"And can you guarantee that this will have no lasting effects on Major Carter?" Kinsey shot back.

Jack was about to answer with a few _well-chosen_ words, when General Hammond interrupted before it really could escalate. "How can he? Colonel O'Neill is no doctor. This will have to be Doctor Fraiser's job," he answered calmly.

Jack and Kinsey stared at each other hatefully, but neither commented the General's words.

General Hammond sighed. "Still, I have no choice. Major Carter will be placed under house arrest. She will be grounded to the base, but when she will be able to leave the infirmary, she will stay within her private quarters on base. She will not be put in a holding cell. However, she will temporarily be relieved of all her privileges and command abilities she has as a Major of the US Air Force."

"Sir!" Jack protested instantly.

"Jack, orders are still orders," the General answered gently. Then he continued: "I will appoint guards to oversee Major Carter and she will have to give back her keycards. Her access codes for all systems will be blocked temporarily. But she is no prisoner. She will be free to go wherever she likes within this base as long as there's someone with her for supervision."

No prisoner, yeah right, Jack thought bitterly. He was sure, Carter would see that different.

" _And_ ," General Hammond went on emphasized, shooting a steely gaze at Senator Kinsey. "I will talk to the Joint Chiefs and the President about this!"

Kinsey looked slightly taken aback at that and Jack began to hope. Maybe Carter wouldn't have to suffer through this for long.

"General?" Agent Barrett cut in, for the first time participating in the conversation. "I'd like to interrogate Major Carter. Maybe I could make a threat assessment."

At this, he shot an apologetic gaze towards Jack, but Jack didn't react to it. In his opinion, the NID still was to be blamed for this whole mess, too.

"You do that," the General agreed. "But give her time to recover, first."

Barrett nodded. "I will speak with her doctor when she'll be able to go through it."

"Alright," the General concluded, before standing up. Jack immediately copied the movement and slowly, all others followed, out of politeness. The General ended the meeting but before he could leave, Jacob held him back.

"George?" he asked, back to his own self.

"Yes, Jacob?"

The Tok'ra hesitated. "Unfortunately, I must return to the Tok'ra. They released me of my duties temporarily because of the emergency but asked that I return as fast as possible. Selmak is needed," he said.

The General nodded. "You can leave whenever you wish."

"Then I will leave immediately."

Jack's eyebrows shot up. "Now?" he asked. "What about Carter?"

"I explained it to her in the 'Gate room," Jacob revealed. "She understands. And I will return when I have wrapped up my mission. But I cannot wait any longer."

General Hammond came over and shook hands with his friend. "Then go," he said. "Good luck."

"Thank you," Jacob replied, before turning to Jack. "Accompany me, Jack?" he asked.

"Sure," the Colonel answered.

"Very well," General Hammond nodded. "Then Colonel O'Neill can give the order to dial up the Tok'ra home world. And I will go put the orders concerning Major Carter into force."

With this the General turned and went into his office, Kinsey instantly following him. Agent Barrett shot them a small, wary smile but then turned away, probably heading to the guest quarters he' gotten assigned for his stay. Jacob and Jack however walked towards the stairs that led down into the control room.

"And you really want to leave now?" Jack asked.

Jacob snorted. "I couldn't be _further_ from _wanting_ to leave," he admitted. "However, I don't have much choice. This mission is very important."

The Tok'ra looked over his shoulder towards General Hammond's office scornfully, where the General had disappeared into with Kinsey on his heels. "I hate leaving Sammie to this idiot's whims," he declared.

"Carter's strong. She'll pull through," Jack said confidently. And he would bring down hell on the Senator if he would decide to stand in Carter's way. But he certainly wouldn't tell that to her father.

Jacob nodded. "Of course, she's my daughter!" he exclaimed. But then he turned and shot Jack a calculating glance. "Still, you'll look after her?"

This time, Jack nodded. "I will."

Jacob clapped his hand on Jack's shoulder in a grateful gesture and together they went down to the control room.


	28. Touching

_**Author's note:**_ _Again, thank you all for your support!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Eight – Touching_

Jack waited for the elevator's doors to open on Level 25. He'd just come from the infirmary and to his complete astonishment, the 'meeting' with idiot-Kinsey and Jacob's departure had taken up enough time for Fraiser to examine Carter and determine that she was, indeed, Goa'uld-free. Jack had taken a moment to speak with the CMO. Fraiser was of the opinion that, physically, Carter was fine. The bullet had gone straight through her body and the lung injury had healed just fine, thanks to his healing powers. And although her body would need a few days of rest and many fluids it should overcome the blood loss just fine.

So seeing that Carter wasn't to be confined to an isolation room or a cell, Fraiser had released her to her quarters. Which was where Jack was currently headed. He was exhausted beyond words and drained of energy, but he at least needed to make sure she was fine. He had to see it with his own eyes or he wouldn't get any rest at all.

Jack exited the elevator and trudged down the hallway tiredly. His body yearned for rest, as well as his mind. It had been much these past weeks and all the energy he'd given to Carter left him walking on the bare minimum.

When Jack arrived at SG-1's private quarters, he saw two SF's stationed at Carter's room, armed to the teeth. Really, they were treating her like a criminal…

Sighing, Jack stepped up and reached for his own keycard. As the base's 2IC he could override entrance codes with his keycard and access almost all rooms on base in case of an emergency and while he'd never used it on any private quarters, he would need to do so, now.

"I'm sorry, sir, but no one's allowed to enter," one of the SF's informed him, when he bee-lined for Carter's room.

Jack narrowed his eyes. "'Scuse me? On whose orders?" he asked, slightly angered.

"Senator Kinsey's," the SF answered.

Again, Jack felt the urge to turn on his heels, find the good Senator and strangle the hell out of him. Enough was enough!

"Well, last time I checked, I was still 2IC of this base and General Hammond was giving the orders," Jack smiled at the SF sweetly.

The SF looked to be confused.

"Do I have to make it an order?" Jack finally snapped. "Get the hell out of my way!"

"Yes, sir!" the SF actually saluted, even though Jack usually hated when fellow officers saluted him.

Then Jack really stepped forwards and swiped his own keycard through the slot on Carter's door. While he waited for his code to override the one her card's slot would demand, he shot another glance at the SF's.

" _No one_ will disturb us," he stated. "Am I making myself clear?"

"Crystal-clear, sir!" the SF's answered simultaneously.

"Good," Jack murmured. There were a few things he had to discuss with his 2IC and he didn't need an interruption.

The door swung open and he stepped into her room. The lights were on in her room, so at least she wasn't sleeping. Jack looked around the neat, tidy room, while the doors closed behind him, locking him in with his 2IC. The room was so… _Carter_ , he thought. Her desk disappeared under thick, heavy science books and work folders and her TV was dusting in a corner. Instead of a pile, she had a basket for her dirty clothes and a few, clean exchange BDUs and civvies were stashed in a corner of her shelf.

Carter herself lay on her neat bed, on her back on top of the crinkle-free blanket. Her boots stood at the side of the bed and seeing that her feet were naked, Jack guessed the socks to be stored in the boots once more. She usually did that when they were off-world and could do without the boots. Her BDU jacket hung over the armchair in front of the desk, so that all she wore were the standard black BDU t-shirt and the blue BDU pants. At least, she'd gotten rid of those horrible clothes Nirrti had put her in!

Carter looked up, obviously astonished that someone had entered her room, when she believed herself to be under arrest. When she recognized him, she shot up from her bed, stepping around it, before she halted in the middle of the room. She stared at him wide-eyed and he just stood there, staring back. Neither of them said a word, not knowing where exactly to begin.

Now seeing her, standing safely in her quarters, Jack finally realized that they'd made it. They'd brought her back. She was unharmed and she was Carter, again. It felt unbelievably good. To see her walk like she did, to hear her speak with her voice. To see her eyes gazing at him with that familiar feeling.

There was so much between them. The anxieties from their imprisonment, the uncertainties of their newfound powers, the guilt from her abduction, the pressure of various galaxies' fates put on their shoulders once again, the threat of the NID, the looming court-martial that could destroy her career, their exhaustion, her declaration of love that just wouldn't stop to happily bounce through his head…

But all Jack currently concentrated on was the joy to have her back. All he felt was the overwhelming relief and delight it brought him to see her standing in front of him unharmed and herself. Nirrti was no threat to her anymore. Jack was no threat to her life anymore. He'd gotten her back, once more, and he thanked all heavens for that much luck.

He gazed into her eyes, simply loving the familiar feeling he found there, and mesmerized, he studied the various expressions crossing her face. He could always read in her eyes like a book, knowing immediately how she felt when he looked into her eyes. She was confused, exhausted, insecure, unsure how to act. And she was happy. Happy to be back. Happy to see him. Happy to be here with him.

Before he knew, what he was about to do, Jack had crossed the distance between them. His eyes never left hers when he backed her up against the closest wall. His body closed in on her, pressing against her, and he leaned down to capture her lips. The moment they touched it was like a fire exploding, all out of control. There was no gentle, awkward trying, no need to familiarize. Immediately they were all over each other. Jack's hands latched onto her waist, pulling her up to him, while simultaneously stepping closer to her, closing whatever space had still been between them. She rose onto her toes and her arms went around his shoulders, her hands grabbing onto him. One of her hands entangled in his hair and the other roughly grabbed the jacket over his back, pulling him to her. Their mouths moved frantically with each other, in surprising sync. Sam tilted her head, changing the angle and when the kiss turned passionate, Jack drew her fully up to him, raising her off of her feet. She moaned and threw her legs around his hips, trusting him to hold her upright. He stabilized her by pushing them against the wall in her back, his legs having no problem with holding both their weights.

Jack ran his tongue over her lower lip and exhaling shakily, she opened her mouth to him. His tongue entered, dancing around hers and she met him equally, fighting with him for dominance. They panted, short puffs of air that mingled in the kisses they shared. His hands began to travel over her body, running up her sides, over her shoulders and down her arms, before he settled them on her thighs, marveling at the strength he felt in the tense muscles that held her up against him. She sighed content and arched her body, pressing her chest against his torso. Through their clothes, he could feel her breasts pushing against his chest and he groaned in response, a noise she swallowed with their kiss.

Her hand at the back of his head moved to his jaw and her thumb began stroking small circles on it, while he paid thorough attention to her mouth. When breathing became an issue, he withdrew his tongue, surprised to find her trying to follow him. When he blocked her however, she whimpered disappointed, a sound that shot straight through him. Immediately Jack returned to her, drawn to her like a magnet. He nibbled on her lower lip, running his teeth over her flesh. She arched again, throwing back her head and this time, an audible moan escaped her. Now Jack was level with her throat and instantly, he began kissing and licking over her pulse point. Sam shuddered and her arms closed around him, pushing him to her with almost painful force. Her fast breath washed over his ear, while he worked his way up her throat to her jaw and then to her ear. When his tongue ran over a sensible spot there, she trembled in his arms and he could feel her fingernails dig into the skin over his shoulder blades through his clothes, pretty sure that that was going to leave marks. Oh, he had to remember _that_ spot!

Sam curled in around him, her legs pulling up and her calves digging into his six. But while Jack noticed by the way, he concentrated on that sweet spot behind her ear that made her pulse race noticeably. Sam groaned out loud and let her head fall down onto his shoulder, giving him even better access. And who was he to pass up such a good opportunity? When she finally couldn't stand it anymore, she shot up again, grabbed his face roughly and drew him in for another heated kiss.

She was like a drug, Jack realized. There was no 'half', no 'maybe', no 'partly' with her. With her, it had always been all or nothing. Either he had to leave his hands completely off of her or he would take _all_ she would be willing to give. It was why they stuck so rigorously to the regs, trusting only on fleeting gazes and light touches to convey their special feelings to the other. The moment they did any more than that? He would lose all control with her and she probably whatever career she had wanted with the Air Force.

Jack's tongue swept through her mouth, his lips moving over hers with a pressure she returned eagerly. He'd always expected it to be like that with her. He had known it would be like that: hot, passionate and completely out of control. Which was why he had always stayed at a certain distance to her. But not anymore. Now having seen – and felt – firsthand how it could be with her; how it _was_ with her, he was addicted. He wanted more, needed more.

And that was when Jack pulled back. Although she was clearly on board, clutching to him as much as he was holding onto her for dear life, he hadn't come to her for _that_.

Sam looked down at him, her chest heaving and pressing against his torso with the large gulps of air she was sucking in. A rosy blush had spread over her cheeks that had absolutely nothing to do with embarrassment and her eyes were glazed over. She looked completely disheveled and simply adorable.

" _Holy Hannah_ … sir!" she said overwhelmed.

Aaaand didn't she just send his male ego soaring with that comment!

He chuckled amused and then rested his head against her throat, inhaling her scent and listening to her racing pulse beneath her pale skin. "Still with the 'sir', Carter?" he teased.

"Still with the 'Carter', sir?" she shot back.

Touché, he thought. He leaned back, looking her right into the eyes and then whispered with a deep, husky voice: "Sam…"

She shivered noticeable and again, his ego jubilated.

"Jack…" she answered breathless.

Oh, that was even better, he decided. He loved hearing his name rolling off her tongue. And paired with that bedroom-voice? Damn!

Still, he reminded himself. _That was not why he'd come!_

"Ah, for cryin' out loud…" he murmured. "Carter, I didn't come for _that_!" he exclaimed frustrated as if it was her fault they'd ended up like this.

She raised her eyebrows at his statement. She didn't answer anything but looked at him confused, gnawing on her lower lip. Suddenly, she looked insecure.

"I'm sorry," he said awkwardly. Way to ruin the mood, O'Neill, he thought, angry beyond words with himself.

She broke their gaze, looking to some point next to his shoulder. "It's okay, sir," she said stiffly and suddenly, Jack had the strangest urge to go bang his head against the wall. He had no idea what he hated more: her avoiding him so obviously after what had just happened between them or her calling him 'sir' again. But, yeah, essentially, that was all completely his fault.

"Put me down?" she asked barely audible.

For a moment, he failed to understand what she meant, until he realized he was still holding her body pressed against his. "Oh. Of course."

With more effort than he would have thought, he pried his hands off of her legs. Slightly blushing, she untangled her legs and let herself slide down to stand on her own feet. Jack almost groaned out loud when she slid down his body, but suppressed it in the last moment. He didn't want to start all over again, even if the thought was seriously tempting.

"Um… how about we just sit down on the bed?" she suggested, still avoiding his gaze.

He rolled his eyes. Yes, because adding a bed would certainly be a good idea. Had worked out fine the last time, too! "Sure…" he heard himself answer, though.

She almost hurried over to the bed and sat down with her back against the headrest, pulling up her legs to wrap her arms around her knees. Jack sat down opposite of her and tried to not see her legs between them as the barrier they most certainly were. How come that whenever he tried to get the slightest bit closer to her, he managed to drive her farther away from him?

"So…" Jack began, unsure how to start a conversation with her. Asking her, how she was doing didn't really seem like a good idea, right now. "Fraiser said, you're… good?"

She looked up to him and Jack was greeted with her professional expression. She nodded. "Janet said my lung is perfectly fine. I was really lucky. The bullet entered between two ribs and went upwards, leaving my body through my neck. No bones were hit and my spine was spared, too. I just need a few days of rest because of the blood loss."

Jack had known but he nodded nevertheless. He didn't want her to think he would snoop around behind her back. Honestly, her injuries were proof that this had been the worst shot in his whole career. Given, he had been thrown around by the hand device and hadn't been able to aim carefully, but he was trained in assassination skills and seeing that he had been standing right in front of her… Jack had never _not_ hit his aim right on target. But this would be the one shot where he really didn't mind failing.

"Thank you, sir," she suddenly said warmly.

He looked at her, surprised. "For what?" he asked confused.

The honest smile remained on her face and he could feel the tiniest bit of the closeness between them come back. "For getting the Goa'uld out of me. For healing me," she answered quietly.

He waved her off. "Nothing you wouldn't have done, if you had been in my stead," he murmured.

"Yes," Sam confirmed and then he heard her inhale, as if she was steeling herself for something. "I'm sorry, sir," she continued.

Jack's gaze shot to her eyes and his dark eyes burned into her light gaze. She looked truly torn and as always he could feel himself give in to her discomfort. "You have nothing to be sorry for, Carter," he declared.

She shook her head. "I was careless. I shouldn't have let myself get captured. I shouldn't have posed that much of a threat to… Earth," she trailed off.

Of course he heard what she couldn't say. She hadn't wanted to endanger her friends, her team, him.

"Oh?" he said. "Then you can see the invisible? Because this is really the only possibility how you could have prevented that from happening."

She grinned, even if rather strained. "No, sir," she contradicted. "But I am able to feel a Goa'uld by the naquadah in their blood. I should have noticed that Nirrti was hiding within the base."

He skidded closer to her, as close as her drawn up legs would allow. "Carter!" he implored. "Cut yourself some slack! Cassie was seriously ill and about to die, so nobody can blame you that your thoughts were somewhere else. Nobody suspected the Goa'uld to even be here!"

"Well, that's exactly my point, sir," she said. "I was the only one who could have detected her and I failed."

"As I said, Carter, you were distracted. It's human. It happens. And it's nothing to blame yourself for, understood?" he insisted.

Sam began worrying her lower lip once more, before she sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "Well, at least it struck me and no one else," she mumbled, her gaze drifting around aimlessly. Then she focused back on him and whispered with conviction: "I'm just sorry, I put you through this…"

His eyebrows rose astonished while he tried to decipher what she meant. She'd purposefully phrased it ambiguously, as she was always demanded to do. She could very well mean their team, the SGC, her friends. And she could mean only him.

"I know," Jack answered, trying to tell her he understood and that he didn't mind. Not that it hadn't been a difficult time for them, but he didn't blame her for it. To his complete surprise however, her eyes began to water, unshed tears swimming in her gaze. She broke eye contact and stared down on the blanket. Jack felt his heart constrict painfully at the hurt he'd seen in her expression. He was weak to Carter and he was even weaker to her tears.

"C'mon," he prodded her. "All's good?"

She snorted and one of her hands reached up to scrub over her cheek but Jack couldn't tell if that was merely a nervous gesture or more.

"No, sir," she denied. "I've sworn I wouldn't put you in that spot again, that I wouldn't force you into a position where you had to make that decision again; that I would be careful. Guess that didn't work out so well, did it…"

Jack sighed. She really was better than he was with that whole feelings-stuff. She was honest with herself and she didn't bottle things up or shoved them away. Sometimes, he really envied her ability to cope with situations. She always stayed true to herself and she never just ignored a problem. She would work through it with time and then choose the way she would deem the best in the current situation. She never only cared for herself, she always thought of all others first. She was the voice of reason, the logic, where he was the brash action. Although he was the one trained in Special Forces, she was the one with the unwavering self-control.

It took much to get her to break down and even more to make it happen in front of him, Jack knew. While they had a unique bond with each other, Daniel was normally her choice when she needed to talk, because they couldn't allow that much intimacy to occur between them. She had to adapt much to his way of ignoring all things concerning any kind of feeling, but sometimes, gestures and fleeting gazes weren't enough to work through the kind of shit they got thrown at them.

Jack opened his arms, but didn't say anything. He wanted to leave the choice to her. She could stay at distance and they would be done with a few sentences, back to doing as if nothing had happened at all. Or she could come to him and he would try and make an effort at this feelings-thing.

Almost immediately, he felt her warm body lean against his side. Her shoulder pressed against his chest and she buried her head into his throat. Her legs were still pulled up and since his legs dangled from the bed, her feet bumped against his thigh. He laid his arms around the Carter-ball she'd curled herself into and embraced her wholly.

"It's alright, Carter," he soothed and upon her disbelieving snort, he continued: "Really. I'm not saying I liked to be in this situation, far from it, but you know as well as I do, that I was the only one who would have done it. That was why you asked me."

"Yes," she agreed.

"See?" he said and trying to say it lightly, he added: "So if anyone had to apologize, it would be me. I mean, I shot you. And certainly not the first time…"

Sam stayed silent for a moment and he was already worrying this had been the wrong thing to say, when she continued: "Sir, I'm not afraid of dying. With the job we're doing, I'm aware it is a very real possibility every time we step through the Stargate. We were incredibly lucky until now, but I know, this can't be supposed to last. And whether I'm dying of a staff blast, an explosion or shot by you doesn't matter all that much to me. Because either way, I'll end up dead. But I don't want _you_ to go through that. I don't want you to shoulder the blame and end up consumed by guilt."

She knew him so well, Jack thought. No matter how he had tried to hide it, she'd seen what it had done to him, maybe even understood why he'd suddenly brought this much distance between them. As usual, she had understood. And she had tried to help him. Well, given that he had been vigorously shoving her away from him, refusing to acknowledge her efforts, she had had no other choice than to simply try and not get him into a similar situation again and now she believed she had failed.

Jack felt her reach around him and one of her hands clutch onto his BDU jacket at the small of his back. "You know, it wasn't your fault, don't you, sir?" she asked. "You may have been the one to end it, but you weren't responsible. It was the entity and then Nirrti. And I actually hoped for you to end it, I _wanted_ you to end it for me. I couldn't do it myself or I would have. But I didn't want to be the one to endanger my friends and my family. I didn't want to be the one responsible for Earth to go into war and for the human race to end in annihilation or enslavement. I would have preferred death any time," she explained slowly.

Jack knew. He had known all the time. She was military, as he was, and they knew each other pretty well, so he'd always been aware he was acting according to her wishes. So why was it that, despite having her consent and her forgiveness, he still couldn't forget or forgive himself? Why did he still despise himself for what he'd done? Why was it still hurting so much to only think about it?

Maybe, he contemplated, it wasn't the thought of killing her that was hurting so much, but the thought of her _dying_. He had known all the time what Sam meant to him and still he had been ready to kill her for the greater good. So maybe, all the time, his problem had not been her death, but the instinctive knowledge that _he_ had to go on. That he would have to continue. Without her. That she would never be with him again, would never be by his side again. How would his life have been without her? Utterly hollow. Void. Empty. It would have been Charlie all over again. He would have lost another one of the people mattering most to him. He would have stood at another grave yearly, mourning the loss of a person that had to die before their time. And despite knowing that there would have been nothing he could have done differently to change the outcome, he would have felt responsible for it.

Daniel would have had to pull him out of another down spiral and knowing the archaeologists persistence Jack didn't doubt he would have succeeded sometime. But nothing would have ever been the same for him. After Charlie, he had closed off completely, had wrecked his marriage in the process and had believed he could never love again. His grieve made him completely unable to commit to any kind of serious relationship, until SG-1 had come along. Daniel and his famous deafness to any words resembling 'no' had been the first ones to worm their way into his heart, becoming the best friend Jack hadn't even known he'd been lacking. Teal'c had turned into another friend and brother in arms with time, slowly becoming the unyielding rock, the steady presence that was always there, whenever Jack felt he was losing sight of the end and his true objectives. The Jaffa understood him, being a warrior himself, and Jack felt like he could still learn from the older, experienced fighter. Carter with her unending patience and unconditional love for him (for whatever reason he would probably never understand) however were the biggest change and surprise for him. She never pressured him and she never expected something from him. She let him do as he saw fit and she never interfered in his life and decisions. In fact he'd been closer to Daniel than to her for a long time, but she still managed to ensure herself a place in his heart Daniel couldn't even dream of. Her love for him was a different kind and it helped him on his journey back amongst the living in another way than Daniel's had. Daniel had been the active part, vocally egging him on to go on, and the archaeologist had a fairly large part in his recovery, but she was the one that kept him going in the long run. She was the one that kept him going, when he felt like quitting, because of all the shit he had to face daily. Daniel was always the one encouraging him out loud, but he was also always aware of her stare, her reassuring smile, her backup from the background. Taking her away from his life? Then what would have been left of that? Jack was scared to even imagine. He didn't want to, much as he didn't want to picture his life without Daniel or Teal'c.

He had been through so much with his team and he'd withstood so much with his 2IC, side by side. They had been through more good and bad times than he had been with Sara during their marriage. No wonder he was… attached to her. No wonder the thought of his life without her left him wanting to scream and rage. No wonder he had hesitated to pull the trigger.

"I know," he said silently to her. Sam sighed exhausted and nuzzled her head closer to his neck, burying her nose into his collarbone.

"Carter…?" he asked hoarsely. "You know that I…"

He trailed off. He wanted to explain to her how he felt, why he had acted the way he'd done. He wanted her to understand. But he just couldn't find the right words.

"I know, sir," she said confidently and again, he became aware of how good she really understood him.

He exhaled relieved, feeling suddenly as if a large rock standing between them had crumpled into nothingness. He was aware that while he had made an effort, he hadn't really succeeded in telling her anything of his feelings. But he held her close. He allowed their closeness to return and he'd always been better showing her than telling her. And with her almost frightening ability to accurately read him, she'd gotten the hint.

"Carter?" he said softly.

"Hm?" she asked back with a sound that was nicely resounding through his body from her close proximity.

"No more," he stated determined.

"No more what, sir?"

"No more hard feelings," he explained. "No more guilt, no more sadness, no more pressure, no more blaming, alright?"

"For the both of us?" she wanted to know.

"Yes," he confirmed. "We will just continue. Where we left of."

She pulled back from him and looked up into his face. Her face was thankfully dry, her eyes no longer threatening to spill unshed tears. She studied his expression for a moment and he let her see everything. Then she nodded.

Jack was aware that there was no chance they could just pretend nothing had happened at all. There had just been too much for that. But neither of them was able to go on unaffected with this much unsettled feelings standing between them. They had needed to know where they stood and now that they had finally cleared the waters between them, they could begin to return to their relationship the way it had been.

He grinned hesitantly at her and she smiled back. It wasn't one of her big, brilliant smiles that made his stomach tingle in a traitorous way, but it was the first honest smile from her he'd seen directed at him in months.

"That's nice," Jack said, referring to their re-familiarizing.

"Yes," Sam agreed wholeheartedly.

Jack looked down on her. He wanted to pull her back against him to revel in the feeling of having her near to him a bit longer but he was aware that he should probably leave some time now. He was spending way too much time with his 2IC who was still in confinement and sooner or later people would get suspicious. And the last thing Jack needed right now was someone alerting Kinsey to his 'relationship' with his 2IC.

As if she was reading his thoughts, Carter straightened, pushing away from him. "You should probably leave, sir," she murmured reluctantly.

"Yeah," he agreed listlessly.

She stood up from the bed and he followed her, crossing the few steps to the door. There, she stopped, looking back to him. "What will happen?" she inquired anxiously.

Jack thought about telling her what had happened at the meeting. But he was sure, she knew already. Either General Hammond, Daniel or Janet would have told her and even if not, then her intelligence would have made her see through it already. She knew what was probably headed her way, she just didn't know, how serious it would really get.

"I don't know," he answered honestly. It all depended on the General's success with the Joint Chiefs, Barrett's threat assessment and Kinsey's amount of perseverance.

Jack stepped closer to her and let his fingers run over one of her wrists hanging tensely at her sides. "But whatever happens, I meant it," he reminded her.

Sam understood immediately. "In this together," she said.

"Yes."

She smiled up at him and subconsciously, she began nibbling on her lips. Her still slightly swollen lips he really shouldn't look at. "Ah, Carter," he said, looking to the side embarrassed.

"Yes, sir?"

"I'm… sorry about that," he admitted grouchily while motioning to where her teeth were. Okay, so he really was _not_ sorry about this, not the least bit, but he felt he owed her the apology.

"Sir?" she asked confused.

He rubbed a hand over his neck, trying his best to not snap at her because of the embarrassment he felt. "Well, you've got enough to worry about with one court-martial looming, so I really shouldn't have put you in this position–"

Jack cut himself off when a big, slow, lazy smile crossed her features, leaving her standing in front of him with such a _sexy_ look, he forgot to breathe momentarily. Sam stepped up to him, well into his personal space, so that her lips were hovering only inches away from his throat, when she whispered: "You do know, sir, that while I'm not discharged from the military, I'm not exactly in their services right now, don't you? I'm in confinement. So for the time being, you are not my Commanding Officer."

Jack actually held his breath when she continued: "So, essentially, you have nothing to worry about. Theoretically, you could kiss me all you want without having to fear any conse–"

She hadn't even ended the sentence, when he was on her again. One of his hands went to her back, pulling her against his frame, while the other went to her chin, tilting her head up to him. His lips crashed to hers with urgency, his kiss gentle, but passionate. She sighed pleased and actually melted into his embrace. Her hands reached up, tenderly grabbing hold of his jaw and then she returned the kiss eagerly.

For a moment, Jack allowed himself to sink into the feeling; the feeling of her being pressed against him, her lips on his, the feeling of her warm, soft body against his. But he remained well aware of where they were: right in front of her room's door, where almost anyone could run right into them. So he didn't deepen the kiss and after a short moment, he pulled back.

When he looked down on her, her eyes sparkled and her lips were red from his kisses. God, what a sight. He had to get out of here, before he would really do something unbecoming of their situation.

"Goodnight, sir," she said, almost as if she had known what went through his head.

"Goodnight, Carter," he answered, reaching for his keycard. "I'll tell the guards to let SG-1 through to you," he promised. "So when you want to go anywhere, call Daniel."

"I will," she said. She didn't ask why he wouldn't come himself and that told him she was probably aware that he would also need a day or two to recover from the strain her healing had put on his body.

"Recover soon," she said, almost shyly, once more seemingly reading his thoughts.

"I'm fine, Carter," he chuckled, before he finally left her room, intent to stagger over into his room and collapse on his bed, where he would not move from for at least a day.


	29. Interrogating

_**Author's notes:**_ _Again experiencing problems with the website: I didn't receive a single review for the last two chapters! Really, it was almost depressing. But then I figured it had to be some kind of error and when I finally got it fixed, the reviews came tumbling in. Again, thank you all for your kind words!_

 _For all those who liked the last chapter, I can assure you there's more to come. And for all those who were disappointed that this was all, well, I can assure you there's more to come. But with the way I built the story up, it couldn't be done and over with just like that. There are still a lot of things that needs to be worked out as you'll see._

 _Then I can announce that the wonderful_ _ **Dafidowndilly**_ _has taken over beta-work for this story. It should greatly improve my English and smooth out all the edges that seem to make sense in my head, and only my head. Thanks again! Still, whatever mistakes you find are all my own because I just can't stop fussing with the chapters…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Twenty-Nine – Interrogating_

"Major Carter. Thank you for coming," Agent Barrett said, motioning towards one of the two chairs standing at the small shaky table, which was about the only thing standing in the bare interrogation room.

Sam raised an eyebrow at the friendly gesture of the smiling man. She knew he was merely trying to be polite, but it really wasn't as if she had any choice _but_ to come here. She had to undergo this threat assessment if she ever wanted to return to her former life, where she had been able to work and walk wherever she wanted without Daniel having to babysit her.

Sam looked back towards the door for the Colonel, who was standing in the still open door frame of the interrogation room. He had accompanied her to her interrogation and he had taken the opportunity to warn her to hide her new powers. He was worried what the NID would make out of this and honestly, Sam agreed. Let sleeping dogs lie, wasn't it?

"Thank you, sir," Sam said earnestly. She was somehow glad he had been the one to come and get her, because Sam had to admit that she was slightly nervous and his steady, confident way helped to reassure her.

He nodded and quickly shot a withering glance towards Agent Barrett, who didn't seem to notice.

"Good luck, Carter," he replied and for a second, Sam thought she saw him frown. For a moment she wondered if he might be feeling guilty because he couldn't help her with this interrogation, but then she dismissed the thought. The Colonel was as aware that this was SOP and to be expected as she was.

Sam made to walk over to the waiting Special Agent, when the Colonel's voice held her back once more. "Hey, Carter?" he asked.

"Yes, sir?"

She looked back over her shoulder and saw him study her with a carefully blank expression on his face.

"Wanna have lunch together?" he asked. "After this?"

Sam knew this wasn't something she should read too much into, but she couldn't help but be perplexed. She had had lunch with the Colonel so many times before it was actually almost a regular routine, so why didn't she feel like it was normal this time? Sam had the distinct feeling that somehow something between them was shifting and that he was starting to treat her differently. Okay, the kiss might have been a dead giveaway that there was something happening between them, but they could very well just have treated it as a slipup, borne from the shit load of stress they had both been through. Normally, when they slipped up in any way, they would avoid each other a few days and stick even more strictly to the rules until they had forced the appropriate distance between them back. So the Colonel asking her to come to lunch with him this time was actually not routine at all and it left Sam slightly confused as to how she should react. Should she comply or would it be better to decline his invitation? Sam had no idea if she was just imaging it all and whether or not it wasn't really that big of a deal.

The Colonel waited patiently, his blank face and his steadfast eyes focused solely on her. He gave no indication that he was wanting her to say 'yes', but he also didn't signal in any way that his offer had been merely polite.

"Yes," Sam answered finally and with a last, swift nod towards her, the Colonel left.

A bit stiffly, Sam walked over to the still waiting Agent Barrett and sat down on the indicated chair, sighing. She wished it was already over. Lunch with the Colonel and his intense eyes was sounding so much better than this interrogation. Maybe during lunch, she would be able to deduce what had caused the recent change in his behavior towards her? Rolling her eyes, Sam tried to concentrate on the task at hand. Right now was not the time to try and analyze Colonel O'Neill's behavior – as if that was even possible in a few hours.

Agent Barrett moved through the room to the other side of the table, always looking in her general direction. From what the Colonel had told her, the Special Agent had insisted that he'd be the only one to interrogate her and that he would tolerate neither Colonel O'Neill nor Senator Kinsey anywhere near his investigation, a fact neither of the two men had apparently taken too kindly to but couldn't do anything about when General Hammond had made it an order. And while she wouldn't have minded the Colonel at her side, inwardly Sam was glad she didn't have to go through this with the Senator in the room. Sam didn't know the man personally but the impression she'd gotten of him was that of a slippery politician who had something against her for reasons unknown to her.

Barrett sat down opposite her and placed a folder that held her Air Force file, a notepad and a recorder on the table. This was not the first interrogation Sam had to undergo, but most certainly the one where the most was at stake for her and therefore she felt quite nervous. She wanted to go back to work with her team, wanted to travel through the Stargate, wanted to work on a few projects with Daniel, wanted to annoy the Colonel with her technobabble and above all else, she wanted her freedom back. The freedom to decide over her own life again. All in all, Sam just ached for normalcy. Her life had been pure mayhem long enough.

Agent Barrett smiled at her encouragingly and tentatively Sam smiled back, causing the man's grin to grow even wider, light crinkles appearing around his eyes. He was friendly and very courteous towards her and Sam couldn't help the thought that, maybe, he was interested in her? Inconspicuously, she let her eyes roam over him. He was her age and a certainly handsome man. He had the boyish good looks of a model and his suit was definitely hiding a nicely built body. Too bad Sam wasn't the slightest bit interested. For several years now she had only had eyes for a certain Colonel and no good looks whatsoever could in her opinion compare to his rugged handsomeness.

"So, Major, I assume you know what this is about?" Barrett began, switching on the recorder.

"Yes," Sam nodded.

Barrett began to repeat a few details for the record, listing the date, the investigation's internal number and the assembled personnel. Then he turned for Sam, his voice neutral and professional, but his eyes reassuring.

"Major Carter, is it true you were captured by a Goa'uld on August the twelfth, 2001?" he asked.

"Yes," Sam confirmed.

"Which Goa'uld was that?"

"She is called Nirrti," Sam explained. "A lower Goa'uld, who was once a System Lord and came to the SGC to discuss placing Earth under the protected planets treaty the Goa'uld have with the Asgard."

Barrett inclined his head in understanding. "I remember reading the mission reports," he said. "Wasn't it Nirrti, who attacked one of the other Goa'uld System Lords and blamed it all on Teal'c?"

"Yes," Sam agreed. "Cronus was the System Lord she attempted to kill and when we found out what had really happened, she was demoted and imprisoned by him."

"So why is she actually free?" Barrett wanted to know.

"A few weeks ago, we managed to defeat Cronus and by this, unwillingly set her free," Sam admitted.

"We?"

"SG-1," Sam clarified. Well, at least, some form of them. It had been mostly their robotic double's doings, but that would go too far for this interrogation, she mused.

Barrett only nodded. "So Nirrti was freed. Did she show any interest in you specifically, when she'd been here for the treaty negotiations?"

Sam pursed her lips. "No, not specifically," she answered honestly. "But then I wasn't in much contact with the Goa'uld representatives. Colonel O'Neill and Daniel were the ones who did most of the talking with them."

"So what reason would Nirrti have to go after you?" Barrett inquired.

"She didn't come after me in the first place," Sam corrected. "She came here because of Cassie."

Barrett looked at her confused.

"Cassandra Fraiser," Sam explained. "Doctor Janet Fraiser's adoptive daughter from the alien planet Hanka."

"Then what did she want with Cassandra?" Barrett wanted to know.

Sam inhaled and then told him all Cassie had to go through in the last weeks: her illness, her fever and her powers. She explained how Daniel and Teal'c had returned to Hanka to search for a cure and had unknowingly stumbled across an invisible Nirrti in her lab.

"So Nirrti followed SG-1 back to the SGC, cloaked?" Barrett asked.

Sam nodded. "Nobody was able to see her and so she spent a few days in the base, studying Cassie."

Sam conveniently forgot to mention that she would have been able to detect the Goa'uld had she been more attentive and she also _accidently_ overlooked that Nirrti had taken an almost immediate liking to her and the Colonel's newfound powers.

Barrett made a note on a sheet of paper and mumbled absentmindedly: "Hm, this could be a considerable security risk…"

Sam inclined her head in agreement. "Yes, I thought of that, too," she agreed. "So I recommended to Colonel O'Neill that we attach a device to the 'Gate room that resembles the TERs we have from the Tok'ra. Um, the Transphase Eradication Rods. They are capable of bringing any invisible or cloaked beings into the visible field. That should prevent anyone from sneaking into the SGC again."

Barrett smiled at her in a captivated way. "Very efficient of you, Major," he recognized.

Sam merely shrugged. She had the suspicion Barrett had meant it as a compliment, but she had simply been doing her job. And she tended to be thorough.

When she didn't visibly react to his words, Barrett continued: "So Nirrti came for Cassandra. Why did she leave with you, Major?"

"Cassandra's powers were the result of an illness," Sam said cautiously. "Once we found a way to cure the illness, Cassie lost her powers and was of no use to Nirrti anymore."

"And she thought you would be of more use?" Barrett inquired.

Sam narrowed her eyes in concentration. She had to check every word now so she wouldn't give away something she didn't want the NID to know. "Well, I have quite a bit knowledge that could be of an interest to a Goa'uld," she averted.

"So that was why Nirrti took you?" Barrett questioned.

"She wanted information from me," Sam confirmed, proud that this wasn't even a lie. "Information I was unwilling to give to her."

"So she took you as a host to gain this knowledge?"

"She hoped she would be able to get access to my memory and obtain the knowledge that way," Sam agreed.

"And? Did she?" Barrett wanted to know. His attention was solely focused on Sam and his initially friendly eyes were now business like and burning into her as if assessing her. He might still be attracted to her, but any feelings towards her were now shoved aside. Now he was completely concentrating on his job. Sam felt measured and she had the unsettling feeling that Agent Barrett was an astute observer who probably noticed more than most people would like him to.

"No," Sam answered simply.

Barrett raised his eyebrows astonished. "No?" he echoed. "But I thought once a Goa'uld has taken over a body, it has complete control over it?"

"That's true," Sam confirmed.

"Also the memory?"

"Also the memory."

"So how come Nirrti wasn't able to gain the information she was seeking?" Barrett asked confused.

"Because I prevented that," Sam answered.

Now Barrett's eyebrows were in danger to disappear within his hair line. "You _prevented_ that?" he repeated. "How?"

"I tried to shield what I didn't want her to know. To hide anything important in a corner of my mind she couldn't reach," Sam explained.

"Is that even possible?" the Special Agent inquired surprised.

"To a certain degree, yes," Sam explained. "We've encountered it before: Sha're for example has hindered the Goa'uld possessing her to expose Daniel Jackson's hideout to another Goa'uld, and Ska'ara was momentarily able to break through his Goa'uld's control and speak with Colonel O'Neill."

Barrett nodded, obviously remembering details from mission reports he had studied. "But those were all Abydonians," he remarked. "I had no idea Tau'ri humans could do that, too."

Sam bit her lower lip nervously. She wasn't sure, Tau'ri humans really could, either. So far she was the only one who had achieved that and she had powers all other humans didn't. But Sam had to give the man credit. Agent Barrett seemed new to the job but he'd certainly done his research thoroughly. He knew a lot about the Stargate Program and its operations and he certainly saw relations Sam would rather he hadn't noticed.

"What did Nirrti want to do with the knowledge she would have gained?" Barrett asked.

Sam inhaled languidly to concentrate. This was one of the important stages, she thought. What she said now would determine whether or not she'd still be seen as a threat. But Sam knew she had no choice than to tell the truth. Any lie or dishonesty would cost her more in the long run.

"She wanted her position within the System Lords back and was prepared to trade the knowledge for it," she began. "When she had her position back, she had planned to overthrow the other System Lords and then attack all races that could pose a threat to her reign, including the Tau'ri."

Barrett nodded and again made a few notes. "When did Nirrti gain control over you, Major?" he inquired next.

Unsure, Sam tried to estimate the time. "I don't know exactly because I had been unconscious, but I think about a day after my capture?"

"So is it correct that you were possessed for something about a week?"

"Yes, approximately."

"And you managed to deny the Goa'uld access to your memory for over a week?"

"Yes."

Now Barrett almost gaped at her. "Major, maybe I really have no idea of what it is like to be controlled by a Goa'uld, but how is that even possible? A _week_?"

"It was a hard, strenuous fight," Sam admitted. "But I was determined because I knew what was at stake. At the end however, I was about to give in. SG-1 came at the right time. I was just about to surrender."

"And when you would have surrendered, Nirrti would have had access to your whole knowledge?"

"Yes."

Barrett's eyes narrowed searchingly at Sam and Sam tried her best to look innocent, conjuring up the expression she always wore whenever she had _failed_ or _forgotten_ to follow a direct order and her CO had called her on it. She just hoped that it was working better on Barrett than it did on her current CO, because until now the Colonel hadn't once fallen for it. Hopefully, the Colonel's observation skills were simply too superior and Barrett wasn't up to par with that, although his eyes were making her feel as if she was being dissected.

"That seems like an almost… superhuman accomplishment," Barrett admitted.

Sam didn't bat an eye, although she felt her hands get sweaty underneath the table. Did he have to phrase it like that? Sam took a moment to check that she was still sitting as she'd been before, with her posture appearing relaxed. She didn't want to give herself away by fidgeting.

"With everything that was at stake, I was rather determined," Sam repeated with what she hoped was a genuine smile.

"Of course," Barrett agreed, but for once Sam couldn't tell if he really meant his words or were merely saying them out of a need to say something.

"Major Carter, is it true that, just before your capture by Nirrti, you had gone MIA?" Barrett suddenly asked.

Stumped, Sam answered: "Yes…?"

What did that have to do with anything?

"With Colonel O'Neill?" he questioned further.

"Yes," Sam confirmed once more. All of a sudden, she had a bad feeling about this and she couldn't help the slight tensing of her body.

The Special Agent tapped his pen absentmindedly on the table, but looked directly at her, his eyes observing her every reaction closely. "You were both under medical treatment after your return?"

"Yes," Sam agreed once again. What was he driving at?

"Then how come I have no information whatsoever on your medical condition after your first capture? And neither do I of Colonel O'Neill," Barrett questioned, in a tone that said he was done being nice and wanted answers.

Sam's brain raced, trying to give her the words she needed to answer without perjuring herself. Not that she was under oath, but she didn't want to give anyone an opening to accuse her of lying afterwards.

"Well, I cannot answer that," Sam finally said. "I'm not responsible for the medical reports, Doctor Fraiser is. Maybe she hasn't updated them yet, because she is still waiting for some test results?"

"Then there is something worth examining?" Barrett concluded.

Sam shook her head. "Not necessarily. After the amount of time the Colonel and I were held captive off-world, it is standard procedure to get checked out thoroughly and be monitored for a certain time to see if there is any late reaction to the alien atmosphere, for example."

That wasn't even a lie, Sam thought, it was indeed SOP. And Janet _was_ still monitoring them, even if it was for very different reasons as Sam was all too aware of.

"Then there is nothing worth mentioning about this abduction?" Barrett drilled unyielding.

By now Sam was close to losing her patience with this man. "What _exactly_ does this have to do with my confinement due to Nirrti's possession?" she questioned in an irked tone. "If you want to know anything about this mission, then read the detailed reports I myself, the Colonel, Daniel, Teal'c, the Search and Rescue teams and Doctor Fraiser have handed in. But I'm sure you have already, so I don't really know why you're asking me about something you already know about?"

Barrett looked slightly caught. "You are right, Major, I have indeed read the reports. I was just wondering if it was really just bad timing that your abduction by a Goa'uld interested in human experiments was right after this certain _experience_ where you'd both been subjected to experimentation by another alien race."

Sam almost gaped at him. Holy shit, the man was observant! Slowly, Sam began to see him as a threat. Barrett seemed determined and had a good eye for important details. He could pose a danger to her and the Colonel, if he decided to keep digging through things.

"Did our reports give you this impression?" she asked, doing her best to sound confused.

"No," he answered and then smiled reassuringly. "Forgive me, Major. Maybe I'm seeing things. I just had an indistinct gut feeling…"

Sam said nothing to that. The man certainly had good instincts and she didn't want to give him some hint accidentally.

"So there is nothing you want to add to those reports?" Barrett asked, fixing her with his stare.

"Should I?" Sam asked back. "These are the official reports of the mission to P3T-643. Everything that is included in those reports is the verified truth."

And anything not mentioned by those reports needed to be examined and proven first, Sam added inwardly.

"I see," Agent Barrett answered and for a moment he seemed to be thinking things over. Then as he looked up at her, his amicable smile was back. "Thank you, Major," he said.

Sam was surprised. "Are we through?" she wanted to know.

Barrett stood up. "I think this is as far as you are willing to cooperate with me, isn't it?" he asked.

Again, Sam was on the watch. The question seemed simple, harmless even, but with the wrong answer, she could easily drive herself into a corner.

"I will answer any question you deem necessary," she answered smoothly.

Barrett shot her another measuring gaze. "Of that I'm sure," he said. "And that was certainly not my concern."

Sam knew immediately what he meant. He was aware that she had been evading him on a few questions. Sam had thought to have done it somehow skillfully and inconspicuously, but now she wasn't so sure anymore. Hopefully, the Special Agent hadn't drawn any conclusions from that.

But whether he had or not, Sam was sure the Agent wasn't done with her yet – or the Colonel for that matter. Suddenly, Sam was pretty sure what his next course of action would be: he would try and get their medical files to see if they were really not hiding anything about their conditions. Sam felt the subconscious urge to gnaw on her lip nervously, but self-consciously, she resisted. Somehow she had to warn Janet. The Doctor needed to be prepared or the NID could accuse her of having withheld information.

"We are done, Major," Barrett ended her interrogation.

Sam stood up and mumbled some appropriate, polite words towards the Agent. She wasn't really thankful, though. How was it that the one time when it really mattered, those idiots from the NID had to send someone smart and observant?

The Special Agent was pointing towards the door, offering her to lead. Stiffly, Sam walked by him when he suddenly reached out and laid his hand on her upper arm. Sam couldn't help the nervous twitch her body did in an automatic reaction. It wasn't that she minded him touching her, she was just edgy. The whole situation had left her tense and uneasy beyond words.

Barrett showed her his switched off recorder, revealing that what he wanted to say to her now was off-records. "Major Carter," he began. "I have said that to Colonel O'Neill, too, but I think I have a better chance to get you to understand. I'm not your enemy. I'm not here to harm either of you in any way."

Sam looked back at him blankly. "I know," she said neutrally. "You are just doing your job."

Barrett looked at her, a lopsided grin crossing his face. "How come that sounds almost like an insult?" he chuckled.

Sam shrugged noncommittally. "I certainly meant no disrespect."

"I know," he said. "But I definitely get the impression that the NID really hasn't managed to make friends around here."

Sam didn't answer to that, again not knowing what she was supposed to say to such a comment.

"However, what I wanted to tell you is that you can trust me," Barrett said, smiling at her with a charming smirk that probably worked wonders on most women. Too bad Sam wasn't most women. "You can talk to me," the Agent continued.

"If I feel there is something you need to know, then I will," Sam assured him.

Barrett snorted amused. "You know you could also talk to me outside of this investigation?" he suggested. "We are about the same age, work in the same field and have both the needed clearance. Also, I find you very easy to speak with. I'm sure we could have some very… interesting conversations."

"Probably," Sam agreed vaguely. By now she was rather sure the Agent was trying to establish some kind of connection to her that he undoubtedly wanted to deepen with time, but while Sam kinda enjoyed talking to the man, she wasn't interested in furthering any relationship with him.

When the Agent stayed silent, Sam walked over to the door. The sound of his heavier footsteps behind her told that her that he was following closely. Sam opened the door and stepped out into the hallway. Her nowadays ever present guards were waiting on either side of the door but Sam had expected that. What she hadn't expected was SG-1 waiting, too. Daniel, Teal'c and the Colonel stood opposite the door, leaning against the wall with impatient expressions.

"Sam!" Daniel said immediately upon seeing her, his face lighting up, relief replacing the concern. Sam smiled and stepped up to the man she considered a brother. Instantly, his hands went out and gripped her hands, squeezing gently to assure her of his support.

"Major Carter," Teal'c acknowledged her with a smile she returned, before he took to glare at Barrett over her head. Sam shot a quick glance at the Special Agent, who seemed slightly confused at the sudden hostility he was presented with, given that he hadn't really talked to Teal'c before. But Sam knew this was merely the Jaffa's display of concern for her well-being and his protective instinct of his friends.

"Carter," the Colonel greeted and she looked over to him, meeting his dark eyes head-on. He hadn't left his position leaned against the wall and he didn't come over to her like their friends had done, but just the tiniest hint of a smile played upon his lips, telling her all he would have said had he had the opportunity.

"Barrett," he then nodded at the Agent still hovering behind them. Sam turned again and saw the Special Agent studying their interaction.

"SG-1," Barrett greeted back politely before he decided to go. Being confronted with a Colonel who could be difficult on his good days, a glaring Jaffa and a linguist who appeared most unwilling to mediate obviously made the other man settle for retreating.

When Barrett was out of sight, Daniel placed an arm around Sam and flanked by Jack and Teal'c, with her guards trailing after them, they leisurely made their way to the elevator to ride up to the commissary. Sam knew she should probably be disappointed her lunch with the Colonel had turned into a team lunch, but she was just so glad for her friends' support, she couldn't really dwell on that. And actually, she had more pressing problems right now. Her brain was frantically going over every nuance of the interrogation, analyzing what it could mean for her. Unfortunately, what Sam came up with was in no way in her favor. Barrett was smart and as much as she had tried, Sam wasn't really sure she had succeeded in thwarting his suspicions. The Special Agent _would_ sooner or later discover what they had so carefully tried to keep under wraps and once he knew, the NID would be informed as well. And Sam wasn't stupid. She knew what that would mean for her, and maybe the Colonel too, but she figured she couldn't really do anything to prevent the inevitable. She could be prepared, however. There were a few things she needed to do and for this, she needed Daniel's help. But how to alert him without raising any suspicions?

"Daniel?" she asked.

"Hm?"

"After lunch… would you like to come to my room?" Sam offered. "I could really use the distraction now."

Daniel's face grew pensive with thought and suddenly, Sam feared he had some urgent project he would prefer working on rather than sitting with her, effectively wasting time. How could she let him know that what she needed was even more urgent without alerting her listening guards?

So Sam blurted out the first thing she could think of. "I was thinking, a game of chess, maybe?"

Immediately, all heads turned towards Sam, all of SG-1 looking at her confused. Sam almost started laughing at Daniel's profoundly stunned expression with which he was now studying her, as if she had grown a second head. It was understandable. They had never played chess together before and Daniel knew as good as she did. All of SG-1 knew. Usually Sam played with the Colonel, her gifted mind and his outstanding tactical knowledge making them the perfect opponents and in fact, the Colonel vehemently defended his privilege to be her chess opponent, even if Daniel would have had the patience to sit through a whole game of chess. But Sam hoped Daniel would see through her flimsy pretense and understand what she was really trying to say. She needed to talk with him out of the hearing range of uninvolved ears, including those of her ever-present guards.

Daniel opened his mouth to answer something undoubtedly along the lines of why the hell would Sam want to play with him, of all people, but before he had a chance to say anything, he caught Teal'c's and the Colonel's burning, not-that-subtle gazes. Obviously both had caught on faster than Daniel and were all but trying to stare him down before he would give something away.

Daniel seemed to understand then and changed direction immediately, saying: "Uh, sure. Why not?"

Sam smiled, feeling as if, for now, she'd done everything she could. She had managed to alert her friends that something was going on and even if she couldn't do something concrete about the situation until after lunch, they now knew.

"Thank you," she said to no one in particular. Daniel squeezed her shoulder and over the archaeologist's head, Sam felt the Colonel's eyes on her, watching her discreetly. Next to Sam, Teal'c walked with his hands clasped behind his back. Although he hadn't said a word, Sam knew he was listening closely and had understood. Finally, Sam allowed herself to relax slightly, the familiar, large frames of her friends walking next to her and almost surrounding her like shields reassuring her.

This was how Sam liked to be the most: surrounded by her friends, her family. But for how long would it be like this? Dread sunk through her like a heavy stone. How long would they still be allowed to carry on like this? How long could she still stand by her friends, would be _allowed_ to stand at their side? How long until she would lose what mattered most to her in the world?


	30. Deciding

_**Author's notes:**_ _Finally the problem with the reviews seems solved and apparently I wasn't the only one experiencing it._

 _In this regard, thank you all for reviewing, and following the story. Special thanks to_ _Dafidowndilly_ _for beta-ing._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty – Deciding_

Jack looked up surprised when a firm knock sounded out from his office's door. Completely taken by surprise that someone would seek him out now, the Colonel actually needed a moment to answer the call. Yes, he was in his office, a public place where people could come and bother him, but all personnel that had crossed his path on his way to his rarely visited workplace would have known to give him a few hours until he would be ready to receive any visitors. Not that he was angry or in a bad mood, but he was thinking and he knew that this tended to look as if he were brooding, and most could do without a brooding Colonel O'Neill.

Jack quickly ran through the possibilities of who could want something from him now in his head, but he came up empty. He had no idea who it could be, seeing that Teal'c had retreated to his quarters and Daniel was keeping Carter company 'playing chess'. And those were about the only people who would regularly visit him at his office.

"Yeah?" Jack called out.

The door opened to reveal Agent Barrett standing in the doorframe. Instantly, Jack's eyes narrowed and his mood dropped a notch further. Great, he thought, just the person he'd wanted to see. Not.

"Yeah?" he inquired again.

"Colonel O'Neill? Could I speak with you for a moment?" Barrett asked politely.

Jack motioned towards the chair in front of him. "Well, door's open, so come on in," he said, not even attempting to sound enthusiastic. To be honest, Malcolm Barrett was the last person he would have liked to see right now. Not because he had anything against the Special Agent specifically, he just disliked his general role in this play. Aaaand maybe he had a problem with the hopeful glances the Agent was shooting a certain Major.

Barrett strode confidently into the room and closed the door behind him, stepped up to the desk and sat down opposite of Jack. Jack made sure to demonstratively sign a few papers first, taking his time to skim the contents of the documents, before he closed the folders and tossed them into his out-tray. Only when it began bordering on downright impolite, Jack finally turned to acknowledge the Special Agent.

"So?" he smiled innocently at the patiently waiting Agent. "How can I help you?"

Barrett looked back at him, his expression impersonal and all business. No flirty smiles for him, huh?

"I wanted to ask you a few things concerning Major Carter's interrogation," the Special Agent began.

All of a sudden, Jack was all ears. "What's with Carter's interrogation?"

"Nothing is with her interrogation," Barrett assured him. "I just wanted your opinion of her."

"My _opinion of her?_ " Jack echoed stunned.

Barrett looked at him as if he couldn't understand Jack's surprise. "Yes," he said. "I just wanted to know if she seemed different to you?"

"Different?" Jack repeated, trying to find out what the Special Agent was getting at. "What do you mean, different? After her abduction by Nirrti? Of course she was different then!"

"No, I meant after her liberation," Barrett explained.

Jack stared at him. No matter how he tried, he had _no_ idea what the Special Agent wanted from him. Barrett waited expectantly, questioning eyes firmly focused on Jack. But two could play that game, Jack decided and stared right back until Barrett finally understood: "You don't know what I'm getting at, do you?"

"What gave you _that_ idea?" Jack shot back sarcastically.

Barrett sighed. "Listen, Colonel. I am trying to make a threat assessment, therefore I need to determine if Major Carter poses a threat to our countries security."

"I thought this was why you were interviewing her?" Jack asked. "What do you need me for?"

"Well, Major Carter was a bit… evasive," Barrett stated.

Jack narrowed angry eyes on the other man. "Evasive? What do you mean, evasive?" he all but growled.

Barrett sighed. "Well, it certainly reminds me of _this_ conversation," he murmured. "Do you and your 2IC always answer questions with another question?"

"Do we?" Jack asked, only to spite the Special Agent. It highly amused him that the Special Agent seemed to be running out of patience with him. However, when an eyebrow of the man began to twitch exasperatedly, Jack gave in. "Barrett, I have no way of knowing what you've asked Carter and what she's answered, but I'm sure she _was_ answering."

"Every question I had," Barrett confirmed. "The problem is, what she told me isn't enough for me to base a prognosis on her stability on."

"So what do you need?" Jack inquired.

"Answers," Barrett stated. "And her medical file."

At this, Jack stared at him in surprise. "Her medical file? I thought you had that?"

Barrett nodded. "I have, but they haven't been updated after her abduction on P3T-643."

Hm, Jack thought, an actually smart NID Agent. Surprising. The important question now was, how smart exactly.

"Well, you'd have to go to Doc Fraiser with these questions," he advised. "She's the one who updates the medical files. She should be able to tell you why there're no further entries."

"I was there," Barrett informed him. "And she referred to doctor-patient-confidentiality, saying I'd need to get one of her superior officers to authorize the release of Major Carter's personal medical information before she could discuss it."

Well, well, well, Jack mused silently. An above-average smart NID Agent. So those existed as well and stupidity and corruption were not actual, essential criteria for employment at the NID…

By now Jack had a fairly decent idea of what Agent Barrett was trying to achieve. He was right, he needed the information of Carter's medical state to assess if she was stable and would remain stable. Carter and anyone else for that matter could tell Barrett whatever they wanted, but the NID would demand irrefutable proof. But then again, they had deliberately kept this information out of the medical files. Once it was in there, it was official and Carter, as well as he, would have to suffer through possible consequences. Not knowing what they were actually dealing with, Fraiser had wanted to make sure before she declared them scientific miracles and let the NID's researchers get their hands on them. Of course it hadn't taken Barrett long to stumble upon the fact that their medical files were lacking vital information. The fact that the Agent had inquired about the mission he and Carter had gone missing on let Jack know that Barrett had also been checking up on him as well. Jack had no idea who or what reason he owed this _coincidence_ to but he certainly believed Barrett to be smart enough to notice the information missing in his and Carter's medical files. Jack himself would've gotten suspicious at seeing something like that. It practically screamed cover-up. And Jack was aware that Fraiser couldn't hide behind the doctor-patient-confidentiality forever. If he and General Hammond refused, then Barrett or Kinsey would get the Joint Chiefs to have the CMO released from her obligation to secrecy, and if Jack didn't want to raise any suspicions that the SGC withheld crucial information, he needed Barrett to get access to those files.

Jack's eyes meticulously searched the other man's face. This was probably why Carter had needed to talk to Daniel, the Colonel mused while studying the Special Agent, trying to assess him. Agent Barrett must've asked her something similar and his 2IC had come to the same conclusion he had: Janet needed to make her finds official now or she could be accused of having withheld information. The problem was not revealing the information, however; the problem was what would happen _after_ they'd disclosed the information. What would it mean for Carter and for him? Barrett would most likely not just nod and decide to keep the medical wonder they were under wraps. He would have to tell the NID and they would, in the best case scenario, send scientists to study them.

Jack almost gnawed on his lip, but he wasn't willing to show any reaction in front of Barrett. Guess that meant time was over. They had reached the point of no return where they couldn't hide anything anymore. It was time to lay their cards on the table and hope for the best. Jack was tempted to snort; the best was not something you could hope for if the NID was involved. Still, Jack was acutely aware that he had no other option than to agree to Barrett's request. Either way the Agent would get the information he was looking for and they couldn't hide what had happened to them any longer. The only part they could still influence was whether or not they would be seen as cooperative later on.

"I'll tell Fraiser to give you all information you need," Jack stated. He really had no other choice. Barrett smiled pleased.

"Anything else?" Jack inquired.

The Agent got the hint and stood up. "No, I believe that will be all. Thank you for your help, Colonel."

"Always a pleasure," Jack said sarcastically. He watched the Special Agent step out of his office, waiting to have his privacy back before reaching over to the phone on his desk. He dialed a number and then waited for the CMO to get on the line.

"Fraiser?" he asked. "This is Colonel O'Neill. Agent Barrett was just here–"

" _Because of your medical file?_ " Fraiser asked straight to the point.

Well, hello to you too Napoleon, Jack thought, rolling his eyes, reassured that in his office she couldn't see him doing it and get her revenge on him during the next exam. "Yeah, mine as well as Carter's."

" _He asked me about it and I–_ " Fraiser began.

"I know," Jack interrupted. "And you did everything right. Still, we have no other choice than to give him the information he wants."

" _But, sir!_ " Janet protested.

"I _know_!" he snapped. "And I like it as much as you do! But if I refuse, he'll go to the Joint Chiefs and then it would look as if we were withholding crucial information or trying to cover something up!"

There was a sigh on the other end of the line. " _Daniel said that, too,_ " Napoleon informed him, before explaining: " _Something Barrett said to Sam made her suspicious, so she asked him to warn me._ "

Jack almost grinned. Then he'd been right. He _so_ knew his 2IC!

"Yeah, just give him what he wants, I authorize it," Jack continued. "But Fraiser?"

" _Yes, sir?_ "

"Do me a favor?"

" _What?_ "

He inhaled deeply, his brain racing. Jack knew he had to do something or he and Carter would end up as lab rats _again._ There was no fucking way he was being subjecting to something like this again, like, ever. And Carter was probably not overly fond of that thought either, seeing what she'd been through recently.

But Jack was aware that he had next to no possibility to do anything. Except…

Jack took a second to think the idea through that had popped up in his mind. It was… risky. And definitely nothing he wanted to do, but if the NID drove him to the extreme? It could work, at least as a last resort. But if he had to resort to that solution, he needed Carter to be on base or she wouldn't have a chance.

"Can you ensure Carter stays confined to the base, or even better to her quarters? For a medical reason?" he asked.

" _I can,_ " Fraiser assured him. " _I cannot say how long though._ "

"That's okay," Jack stated. They only had a small window of time in which his idea would work anyways. _If_ it would work at all.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Jack rubbed his temples. His head hurt. Freaking hurt like it was trying to explode.

"Well, that certainly went… _well_ ," Daniel said into the silence with unusual sarcasm.

"Ya think?" Jack said, but despite his words, his voice lacked the usual sarcasm. Strangely, it was as if he and Daniel had switched roles.

Jack looked up and found his friend, who was sitting opposite him at the briefing table, still looking at the stairs where the dear Senator Kinsey had just disappeared, followed by Agent Barrett. Actually, Jack was glad the other men had finally left. They had been through two days of almost constant briefings and meetings and by now Jack's patience was drained. His politeness had already said good-bye after the first day and now Jack was almost at the end of his last nerve. It was hard work having to suppress the urge to kill the politician all the time. But Jack was aware that he still needed to show his cooperation, even if all he wanted to do was to tell all the bureaucrats to go fuck themselves.

It had turned out much the way Jack had imagined it would. The moment Barrett had held his and Carter's medical files in his hands, he had connected the dots and informed the NID of his discoveries. Almost immediately Kinsey had been back demanding control over the situation that included him and Carter, but of course Jack and General Hammond had unequivocally refused.

What followed had been two days of tenaciously tough discussions. General Hammond had insisted that Jack and Sam didn't pose a threat to anyone and Senator Kinsey had demanded a thorough examination because the General had no means of knowing, had he?

Jack had tried to get them to include Carter, because this did after all concern her, but Kinsey had downright refused, referring to her confinement. Jack had no idea if the Senator did it just to spite Jack or because he truly feared Carter's argumentation skills, but in the end it didn't matter what Jack tried, Carter was excluded from all meetings, and didn't that just make Jack all the testier. At least General Hammond had managed to get Daniel and Teal'c into the meetings by declaring that SG-1 was not only the team affected by the situation but also the ones with the only and thorough knowledge concerning what had happened. And by now, Jack had already been grateful more than once for Daniel's diplomatic skills and Teal'c's calm steady presence. Whenever he had felt the situation was stuck, going nowhere, he knew he could count on Daniel's patient persistence and Teal'c's silent support.

Much to everyone's surprise, Barrett hadn't seemed nearly as interested in the powers Jack and Sam had gained as Kinsey was. The Special Agent seemed more concerned about the overall situation, and annoyed that he had to interrupt his investigation due to the Senator's arrival and immediate taking control of the situation. The Senator had all but stepped into Cheyenne Mountain when he had already insisted on getting briefed about everything they had learned about Jack's and Sam's powers up to now. He wanted to know everything, demanding Jack explain about their capture and the experiments done on them anew, even though he had been handed a long and detailed report the Senator had probably read already. The Senator had also questioned Doctor Fraiser thoroughly, but Jack had to give her credit, she had done nothing to help the Senator. She had stood to Jack and Sam loyally. She had explained her methods of examinations and her discoveries most professionally, but she had also stated that she could not say anything to their powers, because she hadn't ever seen something comparable. And Jack knew these were not just pat answers, after all how could the Doc make a threat-assessment of them when nobody on Earth had ever dealt with anything similar to their powers before. Hell, for all the Napoleonic power monger knew – and she certainly voiced these concerns – she couldn't even say if these changes were permanent. They could very well be only temporary and vanish after some time. Jack suspected this was mere wishful thinking but he had to admit the possibility existed. The Colonel feared neither he nor Carter would actually get that lucky, but Fraiser certainly had to mention the slim chance that this would be over with as suddenly as it had begun.

In hindsight however, Jack feared that had only strengthened the Senator's resolve. Jack had no idea what Kinsey found so fascinating about his and Carter's powers, but the hungry expression he had tried to hide but Jack had caught glimpses of, left the Colonel with a suspicious and uneasy feeling. Somehow Jack had gotten the impression Kinsey would do everything and anything to get his hands on their powers.

Suddenly, Jack found himself confronted with a very determined opponent who would seemingly stop at nothing to reach his goal. Jack knew General Hammond was just as determined to protect the officers under his command and he also knew they were still needed at the SGC, but for once Jack didn't know if that was really enough. Given the threat Carter had just presented herself as when she had been taken by Nirrti, Jack feared Kinsey had a good chance and the arguments to persuade the JCS and the President of the danger they posed. And Jack didn't need a great imagination to know what would happen next.

"This isn't over yet," General Hammond said into Jack's thoughts.

Jack looked at his CO and lifted a corner of his mouth in a weak excuse of a smile. He really appreciated the other man's efforts and the honest concern he could read in the other man's eyes at their situation. Yet he wasn't sure if that was enough to stop Kinsey.

"Senator Kinsey seemed most determined," Teal'c observed next to Jack.

Yeah, Jack thought, and wasn't that the theme of his life? It were always his enemies that were the most interested in him…

"Well, Senator Kinsey isn't the only one with powerful friends," General Hammond said confidently.

"That might be right, General, but right now, the Senator is probably in the better position," Daniel cautioned, frowning because he didn't like to point the thought out. As if Jack hadn't been aware of it already.

"Daniel's right, sir," Jack agreed, swiping a hand through his tousled hair. "Kinsey just needs to scare the Washington brass a little bit, and let's be honest, anything unknown and misunderstood is a good way to scare people. Kinsey will have me and Carter locked up immediately."

If only under the pretense of better being safe than sorry, Jack thought bitterly.

"We will prevent that," General Hammond said determined.

Jack was grateful, really he was, but he just lacked the optimism to see it the way his CO did. Jack was convinced that just wasn't the way it worked for him usually.

Daniel sighed. "We could even achieve it," he agreed with the General.

"What do we need to do, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked. Jack's ears perked up, listening closely.

Daniel frowned, thinking it through. "Well, there isn't much we can do other than to try it the diplomatic way," he explained. "We need to make the brass see that Jack and Sam are no danger, that their powers are comparatively harmless and that they tried to cooperate to the best of their abilities the whole time."

Jack almost snorted. Good luck with that, he thought.

Daniel looked over to him, honesty and confidence shining from his open gaze. "I know we can do it like that, Jack," he said. "Janet's examination results and your compliant behavior are backing us up. We just need a bit time to get through with this."

Yeah, Jack thought. And taking a lucky guess, he would have bet anything that time was the one thing Kinsey wouldn't allow them. The senator wouldn't wait for them to prepare a defense strategy. No, Jack was sure the Senator would have him and Carter confined before anyone could attempt to hinder him. If anything, Jack was aware that time was the only thing they _didn't_ have right now. In fact it was running out with every passing second.

So he had to find a way to buy them time, and he figured it was time for the last-resort-solution.

"Do what you can, Daniel," he said, determined. "And I'll make sure you have the time you need."

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Sam looked up, when the door to her room opened. To say she was surprised would be an understatement, but at least it was a pleasant surprise, she thought, as Daniel entered her room.

"Daniel," she said, swinging her legs over the bed and tossing the scientific magazine she'd read for the third time in a wide loop to some corner. God, she was so bored! None of her friends had come to visit her in two days and Sam hadn't left her room in those days. She had her own little bathroom attached to her room and got her food delivered because Janet had, for some reason, decided that her state was deteriorating, even though Sam felt fine. In the beginning, Sam might have been exhausted due to her abduction by Nirrti and her injuries, but a few nights of decent sleep had cured that. After that, she'd been hungry beyond words, her body in urgent need of nutrients to restore the blood she'd lost, but now she was back to her normal appetite and feeling physically and mentally strong again. So why Janet had suddenly insisted she stay in her private quarters was beyond Sam. The only thing that really accomplished in her humble opinion was that it slowly drove her nuts. Sam couldn't stand to do nothing, in fact she hated it. She needed something to do, but there wasn't much to do while in confinement, so she practically jumped in joy upon seeing her friend, who'd come to visit her.

"Sam," Daniel answered with a serene smile.

Barefoot, Sam patted over to Daniel and enveloped her friend in a warm hug the linguist returned sincerely.

When Daniel stepped back, he reached into his BDU jacket and retracted a folder. "I've got the things you were asking for," he said, giving the folder to Sam.

Her eyes lit up in interest. "Oh! Thank you," she said, opening the folder and quickly skimming through the documents within.

"Um, I've taken the liberty and already signed the places you told me," Daniel continued, motioning with a vague gesture towards the documents she was holding. Sam's eyes quickly went down to the bottom of the documents where Daniel's familiar curvy signature was visible. An involuntary smile crossed her lips when she realized she was able to recognize his signature by the handwriting alone without having to read the actual words.

She looked towards her friend for the split of a second. "Thank you, Daniel."

He waved her off. "No problem," he decided. "I'm just wondering why you're doing this now."

Sam sighed. "When, if not now?" she mused. As long as she still had a little bit freedom to make decisions for herself.

"No, maybe I didn't phrase that right," Daniel clarified. "Why haven't you done this already?"

Sam gnawed on her lip while she stepped up to her desk to search for a pen. "I have, you know? But it needed serious reworking and somehow, there never was the time for it…"

Daniel's eyes only held understanding. "I see."

Sam turned back when she'd gotten hold of a pen and began to mark certain areas with crosses and her signatures. "Do you have…?" she asked her friend, motioning towards the documents.

"Oh, sure. Before I went through the Stargate for the first time with Jack," Daniel revealed.

"The Colonel?" Sam asked, flipping through the papers expertly. She knew the places she needed to mark, because while she might have refused to get it on actual paper until now, she had certainly spent quite some time thinking it through and informing herself all about it.

Daniel nodded to her question. "Yeah, as far as I know, he did it sometime during his black-ops-days. He needed to update them however when he started at the SGC."

Sam gnawed at her lip curiously. Really, she had no idea why she cared, but she would have loved to have a look at the Colonel's documents; what would be written in them and who would be the one–?

Sam was ripped from her silent musing when her door opened once again. She looked up and almost choked when she saw the Colonel enter her room. What was he doing here? Sam hadn't seen him the last two days and inwardly she had begun fearing he was avoiding her again. The last time she'd seen him he had been accompanying her to her interrogation – and then nothing. First he had been in her room, kissing her senseless and thoroughly confusing her, then he had escorted her to her interview, encouraging her, asking her for lunch and bristling at Barrett for various reasons Sam didn't even dare to think about, and then he'd vanished without a word. Given, he had probably been around the base somewhere, but since Sam was confined to her quarters, there had been no possibility to go see him. He needed to come see her, but he hadn't. And with way too much time on her hands and too little to do with it in the meantime, Sam's mind had run away with her, imaging one scenario after the other. Had the Colonel maybe regretted what had happened between them? Did he deem it a mistake? Was he trying to come up with something to tell her to get their former work-only relationship back without hurting her? After all this was how they usually handled it so they didn't endanger their professional relationship. Or was he maybe having problems? Was the NID causing trouble for him? Had she given anything vital away during her interrogation and he was stuck trying to correct her slipup? Had the NID caught on?

Much like this, Sam had been spinning in circles for hours on end until tension and nervousness had her about ready to climb the walls. She had no idea what was going on until someone told her and sitting in her quarters only guessing and questioning had been driving her crazy. She had wished for someone to come and tell her, but apparently none of her friends had remembered to keep her updated…

Given, Sam had gotten the occasional visitor, Felger of the scientific department, Reynolds and Pierce, who had inquired about her well-being, and even Cassie had come to her with Janet, reassuring herself that Sam had returned unharmed before she needed to report on the latest development in the mission 'Dominic'. Sam had thoroughly enjoyed all those visits, but of course none of them could tell her much about what was going on. Felger and Cassie obviously couldn't know, and Reynolds and Pierce had wisely decided to stay out of it as much as possible. The less they knew, the less they could tell anyone. Sam guessed they deemed that their way to help SG-1, fearing they were in for quite some trouble, and Sam couldn't help the thought that they were probably right.

So Sam was actually surprised to see the Colonel. After worrying for hours, she had finally settled on the realization that whatever the reason, he wouldn't come to see her any time soon. Either he was held up by the NID – then he would have bigger problems than her boredom. Or he was avoiding her, in which case he wouldn't seek her out until any hard feelings between them had faded. Whatever it was, the outcome would be the same: he wouldn't come to her room and Sam was stuck hoping for Daniel to visit her, all the while trying to think of ways she could get information on the Colonel from him without alerting the attentive archaeologist.

"Sir!" she blurted out, sounding as stunned as she believed herself to look right now.

He nodded in her direction, while the door closed behind him. "Carter. Space-monkey," he greeted. Daniel scrunched up his face at the hated nickname but he wasn't commenting on it anymore.

The Colonel narrowed his eyes at them, taking in the picture they presented standing hunched over a bunch of papers. "So, whatcha doin'?" he inquired leisurely.

Sam's mouth went dry instantly. This was her chance, she realized. But she didn't really feel ready for it.

He came closer, striding forward confidently, not the least bit awkward in her presence. So maybe he hadn't been avoiding her, maybe he wasn't regretting and maybe she could ask him?

Sam tried to open her mouth and ask him, all the while feeling the actual words escaping her. Before she could seriously embarrass herself however, she simply shoved the folder at him. He lifted an eyebrow astonished, but took the offered folder and began to flip through the documents. Sam knew what he would see. Official documents from the Air Force, a notary, her bank, her real-estate agent and so on. Everything in the folder detailed what she wanted, starting with her last will and then patient's provisions, a living will, dispose of her bank accounts and her estate as well as directives about her whole property. She settled everything, from the way to treat her should she suffer severe traumas from an injury to things concerning her death to anything occurring after her death. If anything, the entity and Nirrti had pointed out that her will needed to be known, even if she couldn't tell it herself anymore. She needed people who would enforce her decisions, everything she would wish for herself, if she couldn't do it anymore. Thus she had set Daniel to the task of contacting all the necessary people and have them set up legally binding documents so she could sign them and safeguard herself against any possible outcome her dangerous life at the SGC could have for her. And of course, the people she wanted in charge were the Colonel and Daniel. First and foremost, she wanted the Colonel to be the one to look after her, to be the one to push her wishes through, because he was the person she trusted most. Daniel acted as a witness and as a second choice, taking over any and all rights she was giving to Jack should he be unable to administer them.

That was if the Colonel would agree to it. Sam hadn't asked him beforehand and while they had talked about their wishes and wills before, she hadn't actually given _him_ anything concrete that would enable him to ensure her will.

Sam watched the Colonel, noticing the narrowing eyebrows, the tight line his mouth set into and the hard edges the corners of his mouth dug into his cheeks. Yeah, he didn't look too pleased, did he?

Sam began to fidget nervously when the Colonel all but snapped at her: "Carter, what's this?"

Sam completely failed to answer, intimidated by his anger. She was giving him extensive, vital rights; the rights to decide over her and her life in situations she would be vulnerable the most, where she would need a true friend the most, and she definitely had problems with handing these rights over. She didn't like losing control over herself and she knew what was at stake. She was no average human anymore and there were people interested in her in one way or the other, so she needed someone to defend her when she couldn't do it herself anymore. She had chosen Jack for that and she had taken a loooong time to think this through. She had feared it would establish some connection between them neither of them wanted to acknowledge or deal with normally, but he was the one she trusted implicitly, the one she would trust with her property, her finances and her whole life. Unfortunately, he didn't seem very happy with her choice, did he?

"Well, what does it look like, Jack?" Daniel inquired, when Sam failed to answer. "I think the documents speak for themselves?"

"I know what those are!" Jack snapped back at him. "I wanna know why Carter didn't have them yet!"

Sam winced. Ah, small misunderstanding.

"Sir, I can explain," she interjected demurely. "It's not that I didn't have all these documents before, it's just that they needed reworking."

That wasn't even a lie. Previously, all those documents had her father listed as the one in charge. Seeing that he now belonged to the Tok'ra and spent quite a bit time far, far away from Earth didn't exactly make him the best choice anymore. Sam had known for some time that she needed to work these documents over to bring them up to date, but somehow, there had never been the time. Now she had time, lots and lots of time to be exact, and fearing what the future could bring for her she'd decided to take the chance as long as she still had the possibility.

Sam looked over at the Colonel, whose blazing eyes dimmed slightly, calmed. Nervously, Sam waited for him to show any reaction to her offer. Finally, she couldn't stand waiting anymore and asked hesitantly: "Sir, do you… would you…?"

She motioned towards the papers he clutched with a hand so tight he threatened crinkling them.

"If not, then I need them to be changed to put Daniel completely in charge," she continued to ramble when he still failed to react.

The Colonel looked down onto the documents, then back up to her. "You want _me_ to…?" he asked surprised.

Sam blushed slightly under his intense gaze but held his searching eyes. He seemed stunned, almost shocked that she had chosen him. That she wanted to put him in charge. Sam was aware that he had settled on someone else, probably Daniel, possibly out of fear, how it would look if he appointed his female 2IC, if he even ever considered her for it. She didn't care though. _She_ wanted him to be the one, whatever he or anyone else thought of it.

Gnawing on her lower lip anxiously, she waited for any reaction from him. Then, with two steps, he had crossed the distance between them, halting right next to her, standing unusually close to her. Sam actually stopped breathing when he reached out, his free right hand extending out to her. His dark eyes burning into hers for a moment, he simply took the pen from her and without saying a word, he began to sign the documents, one after the other. A feeling of giddy, all-encompassing happiness spread through Sam, making a relieved smile spread over her features.

When Jack was done, he snapped the folder shut and handed it over to Daniel unceremoniously without looking at the other man. Sam gazed at him surprised and he explained: "We need to talk, Carter. Privately."

Aaand almost immediately the happiness was gone, replaced with concern and dread due to his serious voice.

"Oh, that's alright, we were done anyways and anyhow, I need to hand in these documents, seeing that Sam is… indispensable," Daniel answered for Sam.

The archaeologist flipped through the documents scanning for something missing, when Jack pointedly said: "Well, then good-bye, Danny-boy."

Daniel nodded, but then a frown overtook his features. "Ah, Jack? You forgot to sign one of the documents," he stated, pulling a sheet out of in between the other papers.

Grumbling under his breath, Jack marched over to his friend and with only a quick glance to the official document, he boldly scribbled his signature down in the intended slot. Noticing the blank space next to his signature, he said: "Carter, you haven't signed that, either."

Blushing and mumbling an apology, Sam went over and taking the pen from the Colonel, she hesitantly stepped in front of him and hyper-aware of his close proximity, she signed the document hastily.

Again, Daniel quickly scanned the folder and then nodding satisfied, he waved it at Sam. "Don't worry, I'll get all those documents to the right places in no time. Whatever happens now, you'll have full control."

Sam went up to him and embraced him once again. "Thank you, Daniel," she said warmly.

"Don't mention it," he murmured back, squeezing her to him for a moment.

"Yeah, and now, _good-bye Daniel,_ " Jack insisted behind them.

Daniel let go of Sam and sticking his tongue out at Jack, he left the room, the folder tucked securely under his arm. Silence filled the room, when Daniel was gone and slowly, Sam turned towards the Colonel standing behind her.

"Thank you, sir," she said slightly insecure, but he just waved her off.

"We have other problems right now, Carter," he stated. With a quick glance at the clock hanging at her wall, he leaned back to recline against her desk, his arms crossing in front of his chest and his legs crossing at his ankles. Sam stared at him curiously.

"The NID's hot on our trails," the Colonel admitted.

Sam had expected as much. She had long since feared either the Colonel or General Hammond would have no choice but to disclose all information to Agent Barrett if he insisted he need it or they could be accused of having interfered with an official investigation. So Agent Barrett would now know about their situation and it would fill in the holes in the stories. He would be able to write a preliminary report and consequently the NID would know about their powers.

"How bad is it?" Sam wanted to know.

The Colonel sighed and raked a hand through his tousled hair. For the first time, Sam noticed he looked tired. "I've constantly been in briefings, meetings and discussions these last few days," Jack admitted. "I tried to get them to let you participate too, but _Kinsey_ refused."

He spat the Senator's name with a spite that surprised Sam. What had Kinsey done to infuriate the Colonel so much?

"Well, long story short, right now Kinsey makes us out to be a considerable, unpredictable threat and wants us thoroughly examined to see whether we're a danger or not," he continued.

Sam paled. "Sir, that's…!"

She didn't even know what to say.

"Ridiculous, I know," Jack nodded. "But Fraiser unfortunately can't say what long-term effects our powers will have and so the NID is pressing for further examinations. Examinations the Doc can't do here with the whole base needing her."

Sam felt like being thrust into a deep, dark hole. She felt like she was falling into a bottomless pit, spiraling down into an abyss. She felt out of control with a certain, unclear feeling of fear and dread spreading through her numb body. Well, at least the impending court-martial would be off the table, Sam mused acrimoniously. The Air Force wouldn't risk the chance of having to discharge her now that she had turned out to be truly valuable.

But then the true meaning of what the Colonel had just revealed slammed into Sam, taking her breath away.

"They're turning us into lab rats. Again," she whispered. Jack nodded gravely.

Sam clenched her fingers into fists, her tense arms shaking at her side under the pressure she put them under. Her mouth set into a grim line when resolve took her over. Gazing at the Colonel with blazing eyes, she stated determined: "No!"

He raised an eyebrow at her, but didn't seem affronted by her very disobedient voice. She explained firmly: "I'm not going to be turned into another experiment! _Never_ again!"

Jack shrugged. "They will simply order us to undergo the exams," he clarified.

Sam began to pace in front of him, thinking things through. He was right, they really had no choice, no say in that matter. The Air Force would simply take over, for the greater good. If they were convinced they were posing a threat to national security, then there was nothing they could do about it, anyways. They would be ordered to comply and if they still refused, they would just be taken into custody. As much as Sam loved the Air Force, loved being a part of the organization, loved to work for her country and save her planet, she _refused_ to lose control over her life again. Everything within her protested at the thought of having to undergo all this procedures again. It didn't matter that now it would be humans, Tau'ri even. It had been Conrad and the entity first, then the alien race and lastly Nirrti. She refused to let _anyone_ tamper with her and her body ever again. Nobody, aside from herself, would have any say in what happened to her and her body in the future!

But if Kinsey got to go through with this, and according to Colonel O'Neill he was on his way there fast, then her life had been _her_ life for the longest time. Everything would be decided by others. She wouldn't be able to work anymore, she wouldn't be in the Stargate Program any longer and she would probably never see her friends again. If Kinsey would get his way she would be living under a microscope in the name of science and the safety of the planet. No fucking way in hell!

Sam stopped abruptly and put her arms around herself. What could she do? If there was any way to get around this, then the Colonel would have succeeded already. If he'd been in briefings all those days while she had been sitting here idly and bored then they had probably tried every solution they could come up with and had failed. And if he hadn't found a way out for them, then what chance did Sam have in her confinement?

"Sir, I can't do this," she admitted quietly. "Not anymore. Not ever again."

"Me too, Carter," he answered.

She looked up at him and was greeted with a steely resolve. Confused, she tilted her head and smiling tightly, he explained: "I don't do all too well with regulations and rules in the first place and _nobody_ will decide over _my_ life over _my_ head!"

Sam exhaled deeply, feeling understood. He was in the same position she was and he had the same problems. She wasn't alone in this. He was as much in danger as she was.

"Is there anything we can still do, sir?" she asked. She hated not being able to try and find a solution herself but she had no means of knowing what had happened already, what they had tried and done. She was dependent on the information she got and even this was barely providing her with a basic understanding of what had transpired, definitely not the inside knowledge she needed to figure out a solution.

Jack sighed. "General Hammond and Daniel are working on a diplomatic solution but they need time. Time we may not have, because as soon as the NID get the orders pushed through, we'll be taken away and neither Hammond nor Daniel can stop that."

"And as soon as they get their hands on us…" Sam began.

"It will get increasingly difficult to get out of there again," Jack ended.

"So, what're we going to do?" Sam asked.

The Colonel looked straight at her, his gaze calculating and sure. "We're going to give them the time," he explained. "We're going to disappear."


	31. Escaping

**_Author's notes:_** _And here, the awaited solution Jack thought of for their situation. So excited to see what you think of it!_

 _Once again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing my story, and special thanks to Dafidowndilly for beta-ing._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-One – Escaping_

"Disappear, sir?" Sam questioned dumbfounded. "Really?"

Jack looked at her pensively. "I don't see an alternative, do you?"

Sam thought it through, her brain racing to find another solution to their problem, but failing spectacularly. She shook her head in defeat.

"But where to, sir?" she asked worried. "The NID will search everywhere for us. The Air Force will probably look for us, too. We'll be declared deserters. There would be no place on Earth we could hide safely."

Jack nodded. "I know," he said. "That's why we're going to hide off-world."

" _Off-world?_ " Sam echoed flabbergasted.

He nodded. "It's the only solution I could think of anymore. With all those planets out there, it would be like looking for the proverbial needle in the haystack. They wouldn't find us."

Stunned, Sam thought it through. He was right, of course. They had nearly unending possibilities to disappear within the network of connected planets, but leaving Earth? She didn't like the thought of running away in the first place, and even less fleeing from her home planet. Would they have a possibility to return?

"Sir," she murmured insecure. "Are you sure…?"

He sighed. "Do you have a better idea, Carter?" he asked. He didn't sound impatient; in fact he managed to appear hopeful. Apparently he wasn't really fond of that idea either, but he hadn't been able to come up with another solution. And in all honesty, Sam couldn't either, at least not in the short time they still had and not lacking as much information as she did.

"You do realize, chances are high that we won't ever be able to return?" she inquired quietly.

He uncrossed his arms and raked a hand through his messy hair for a moment before he answered: "Yeah, thought has crossed my mind."

Sam gnawed on her lower lip in deep thought. "Even if we take a GDO with us, they will simply lock us out of the system like the last time. We wouldn't be able to use our codes. We're still presenting a certain threat to Earth and even more so, if we're going to… disappear."

His eyes found hers and held their gaze. "I know," he said simply.

Sam acutely felt the weight of the decision she was about to make. What should she do? Should she run and leave everything behind, everything she had worked so hard to achieve? Then again, they wouldn't leave her to it, anyways. But could she leave her friends? Could she do that to her father? Could she just desert without letting him know what had happened to her?

Sam knew there was a miniscule chance they might be able to return after some time. The Colonel had said that General Hammond and Daniel were working on a diplomatic solution and needed time to work through the chaos their new powers had created, but realistically, Sam knew how slim the chance was. She and the Colonel were probably the most interesting phenomena they had brought back through the Stargate in all the years and they might even hold the key to the Goa'uld's defeat, so Sam was fairly confident the NID would not just leave them alone.

Sam's thoughts were running rampant and she knew it. Confused, she reached up and rubbed her fingers along her temple in an attempt to relieve the pressure building in her head.

Upon seeing her distressed expression, the Colonel pushed away from her desk and walked over to stand directly in front of her. "You don't have to come, Carter," he said humbly. "I'm neither going to force you nor will I order you to accompany me. It's your decision. If you want to stay here, you can."

She looked up to him, searching his open gaze. "You're going to go, sir?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yes. Definitely."

Sam gulped. He would go. He would leave Earth and go hide somewhere out there in the vast space of the galaxies. And Sam knew that when he went, he would be gone for good. He wouldn't tell anyone where he'd go, because it would defeat the whole purpose of disappearing in the first place and also might endanger the person if the NID would get behind the scheme, and Sam was pretty sure that when the Colonel wanted to stay hidden, nobody would be able to find him; neither the NID nor anyone from the SGC. He would disappear and probably never come back. This would be the last time she would get to see him.

Suddenly, Sam felt fear rise within her. The thought of being unable to ever see him again was cutting through her like a knife, taking all breath away from her. How was she supposed to go on or to get out of this mess without him by her side?

Sam frowned, frustration and a little bit of panic rising within her. She had always been independent, had relied on nothing but her own abilities, so why did it feel like she needed him so badly? She quickly realized she didn't. She would probably still do alright without him; she just didn't want to. She wanted him with her, wanted to be by his side. She wanted to have him in her life and she dreaded the thought of him going and leaving her behind. She had almost gone nuts when he had been left behind on Edora and then she had been sure she would be able to bring him back. What would she do if he left without any intention of returning?

In this together, she mused silently. The NID would either get them both… or neither of them.

Determination settled within her and she met his resolved gaze head-on. "Take me with you, sir!" she requested.

He nodded, a relieved expression passing so quickly over his features she thought she imagined it.

"Get dressed," he ordered, motioning to her combat boots standing forgotten at the end of her bed.

Sam almost choked. "We're going _now_?" she spluttered surprised.

"We don't have any more time," he explained. "A representative of the Pentagon is on his way here. He is to be briefed of the recent events by Barrett and if he decides Kinsey's requests are reasonable, then…"

He trailed off but Sam didn't need him to finish that sentence for she knew what that would mean for them. They'd be under arrest and undergoing medical examinations faster than they could say 'freedom'.

Wordlessly, she walked over to her bed, sat down on the edge and began to put on her socks and boots. Her head spun with the implications of what they were about to do and she frantically tried to shove them aside in order to concentrate on the task at hand. Jack came over to her, dropping her BDU jacket around her shoulders, and habitually, she pushed her arms through the sleeves and buttoned it up.

When she was finished, she stood up again and waited for a sign from him, but he just stood there, observing her quietly with no sign of departing soon. Sam realized she was standing stiffly, her body rigid and her muscles tense, and her eyes were wide-open and staring at him, asking for guidance as if she were a first year cadet. She didn't want to look so vulnerable or to appear weak in front of him, especially when he was trying to save their asses, so she smiled at him tentatively, trying her best to make it convincing. He reciprocated as an automatic response however his was more of a contemplative smile. Then he reached out and slowly ran a finger down her cheek. Immediately, she felt all tension leave her body and her smile grow honest. As always, his presence calmed her.

"Let's go," he stated firmly. Sam nodded and followed him to the door. He opened it with his keycard and together they walked out. The guards outside Sam's door shot them a curious look but didn't appear concerned in any way. It wasn't uncommon for any members of SG-1 to come and collect Sam for a meal in the commissary. The time wasn't really fitting for a meal but if her guards noticed they didn't seem to think anything of it. Routinely, they fell in step behind her and the Colonel and they all walked towards the elevator. The Colonel had his arms crossed in front of his chest, but apart from that, his body language gave no indication of what he was planning to do. Silently, they walked through the deserted, half-lit corridors. Night had fallen and apart from the skeleton crew, all personnel had left Cheyenne Mountain. The lights had been dimmed to save energy and aside from all essential rooms like the 'Gate room, control room, armories, security checkpoints, commissaries, infirmary and the officer's private quarters, nothing was getting operated anymore.

Sam halted next to the Colonel when he pressed the elevator's calling button and when it arrived, they all piled in. The Colonel pushed the button for Level 28 before either one of the SF's had the chance to notice. The doors had barely closed when Sam saw the Colonel shift slightly. One of the hands he had crossed in front of his chest slipped into his half-open BDU jacket and pulled out a zat. He cautiously kept it hidden in the folds of his jacket and careful to not move in a way that would alert the SF's to what he was doing, Sam continued staring at the elevator's door.

With a _beep_ the elevator announced they had reached their destination. From the corner of her eyes, Sam saw one of the guards look at the digital display on the elevator's operating panel. "Level 28?" the guard said surprised. "But she is not supposed to–"

He didn't finish the sentence. A single zat shot rang out and Sam saw blue energy dance over the elevator's operating panel. Sam knew immediately that the Colonel had short-circuited the elevator's electricity. Now nobody could use the elevator anymore to come after them and simultaneously he had wrecked the security camera in the elevator, which was connected to the operating panel's wiring.

Before either of the guards had caught on, the Colonel had swiveled around and giving him room to operate, Sam let herself drop to her knees, getting out of his shooting range. Two fast zat shots sounded out, followed by the heavy thumping of two bodies hitting the ground.

Sam turned and saw the guards crumpled on the ground, unconscious. She straightened up in time to see the Colonel shut down the zat. He shoved the weapon at her and in an unconscious reaction, Sam grabbed onto it.

Silently, he went over to the elevator's door and began to wriggle his fingers into the small gap between the doors. Sam watched mutely. Short-circuiting the elevator's electricity had assured the doors wouldn't work anymore, so they had effectively trapped themselves within the small space of the SGC's elevator, but the Colonel managed to pry the doors apart an inch, then shoved his hands in the slit and with a grunt, he began pulling the doors open. Sam saw his muscles bunching under his BDUs and was reminded that the Colonel had increased strength at his disposal. Maybe he would be strong enough to open the doors.

The doors gave in and opened only seconds later, revealing the empty, half-dark corridor before them. The Colonel shook his arms and shoulders loose and shot her a quick, reassuring glance. Sam smiled back tightly.

And then they ran. Together, side by side, they sprinted down the hallway. The conked out security camera in the elevator would have alerted the security on Level 16 by now and they didn't have any possibility to hide from or disable the rest of the security cameras. They would raise suspicions the moment they stepped out of the elevator without Sam's guards anyway. Figuring it wouldn't take long until the alarms giving their escape away would sound out and guards were sent after them, they both knew they needed to be fast before the SF's were on their heels. The Colonel pushed for more speed and Sam barely kept up.

"Carter, get to the control room and dial up a planet!" he ordered her.

"Which one?" she asked back.

"I don't care!" he shouted, when suddenly alarms rang out around them. "We're making a detour anyway!"

She nodded. "What're you going to do?" she wanted to know when they neared the stairs going up to the control room.

He motioned further down the hallway. "I've hidden a few supplies for us and I'm going to get a few weapons!"

With a short nod she indicated that she had understood and then sprinted up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. When she entered the control room, two Tech Sergeants were sitting at the controlling computers, looking up confused by the unexpected alarms. But before either of them had a possibility to react to her sudden appearance, Sam had drawn the zat and shot both of them once. Pushing back the guilt that washed over her at the sight of the friendly, familiar faces of her fellow officers as they went down, Sam dashed for the controls, punching orders into the dialing computer's keyboard. Without thinking, she chose the first planet's address she could think of to get them out of here safely and while the Stargate began spinning, the first chevron locking audibly, Sam worked on shutting down as many corridors and passages leading to the 'Gate room as she could from the control room. It wouldn't stay that way long, she knew, because with her codes being locked out of the systems, she couldn't do more than give simple operating orders any higher ranking officer could override with their access keycards, but hopefully it would buy them a bit time. It wouldn't keep the guards stationed at Level 28 to come after them but it would delay backup and there wasn't much more Sam could do from here.

One after the other, the chevrons locked in place and then the wormhole kawooshed to life. Sam saw the Colonel jog up the ramp to the event horizon. He had two huge, jam-packed backpacks with him and weapons were hanging from everywhere of his body. Reaching the stable event horizon, he pulled out one of his combat knives and held it into the established wormhole to keep it open. He turned and locking gazes with her through the control room's large window, he yelled: "Carter, come on!"

Immediately, she left the controls and raced for the stairs, almost tumbling down the steps from the speed she used. When she stumbled into the hallway, she could already hear the sound of uncountable footsteps approach them. Sam began to sprint down the corridor to the blast doors leading to the 'Gate room, when sudden shouting behind her indicated the first SF's rounding the corners had spotted her. Sam barely managed to take the corner and slide into the 'Gate room, when bullets hit the wall of the corridor she'd just left with audible _pings_. They were _shooting_ at her!

Breathless and startled, she pushed her legs to go faster and sprinted for the Colonel waiting impatiently for her next to the event horizon.

"Carter!" he shouted irritably and Sam knew he could hear the guards drawing nearer by their increasing shouting.

Sam jumped onto the ramp, yelling back: "Go, sir!"

He didn't. He waited until she had caught up with him and together, they threw themselves into the wormhole, escaping from the SGC.

Sam imagined she could still hear the sounds of screaming from the guards when she entered the wormhole, but the moment the event horizon encompassed her all noises drowned out, the familiar feeling of electricity and cold washing over her when the pull of the wormhole took her away.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…" Daniel grumbled sleepily, grouching at the unrelenting, heavy pounding on his door.

Swinging his legs over the bed's edge, the archaeologist turned on his bedside lamp and then reached for his glasses. Squinting, he shot a quick glance at the clock hanging on the wall only to stifle a groan. It was three o'clock in the morning! Who the hell needed something from him at this ungodly hour when he had for once decided to sleep through a night instead of working half of it?

Barefoot and only clad in his boxer shorts and a sleeping t-shirt, he padded over to the door and opened it. Blinking, he narrowed his eyes at the sudden bright light he was confronted with. In front of his door stood Senator Kinsey, General Hammond, Colonels Reynolds and Dixon and a bunch of SF's, all looking decidedly unamused.

"Yes?" Daniel yawned with a mixture of fatigue and confusion.

Senator Kinsey stepped forwards, getting in Daniel's face, which caused the linguist to step back a bit. He really didn't need to see so much of this man this early in the morning!

An angry red hue spread over the older man's face, when he all but snarled at Daniel: "Where's Colonel O'Neill?!"

Daniel blinked at him owlishly. What kind of question was that? The General, Dixon and Reynolds knew exactly where Jack's room was. Why did they need to wake him up for that?

"Um… wrong side of the hallway," Daniel answered nevertheless, pointing to the room opposite of his that was Jack's.

"He's not there," Reynolds informed Daniel kindly while the Senator only stood there, fuming at him, appearing ready to pop a vein in a not-too-far future.

Still, Daniel failed to catch on. "And what makes you think, he would be here?" he asked, motioning backwards into his room.

General Hammond sighed, but somehow, it only sounded amused. "Doctor Jackson, Colonel O'Neill is no longer on this base," he explained. "He has freed Major Carter and escaped with her through the Stargate."

At this, Daniel came abruptly awake. Gaping at the assembly in front of his door, he fished for appropriate words but the only thing his head came up with was a barked "… _What!?_ "

Jack had done what? How come Daniel didn't know anything of that? Had Sam known? Or had they decided this after he'd left her yesterday? Where had they gone? Why hadn't they taken him and Teal'c with them? They were a team, were they not?

Then Daniel's brain finally caught up. Now a few remarks Jack had made suddenly made sense. Daniel had asked him to try the diplomatic way. He even remembered telling Jack he needed a bit time for that and the Colonel had responded he would make that possible somehow. Had this been his solution? Getting him and Sam off the radar so he and General Hammond could work on a solution? No wonder they hadn't taken him with them! And if Daniel knew Jack as well as he thought he did, then they'd left Teal'c with him for protection. Good god, they would have better taken the Jaffa with them! Daniel would be doing fine, even without their Jaffa friend, but who knew what dangers would await Jack and Sam?

"I told you Doctor Jackson wouldn't know," General Hammond said pointedly towards the Senator.

At this the man rounded back in on Daniel. "Where _._ Is _. Colonel O'Neill?_ " he inquired, barely holding on to his smooth façade.

Daniel shrugged. "I have no idea," he said honestly. Jack had never told him a word of his plans and Daniel realized it had been done deliberately to protect him. If Jack needed Daniel to work on a diplomatic solution, then Daniel couldn't get involved with this at all. He wasn't military and if Stargate Command thought him unreliable in any way, he'd be off the program faster than he could protest. And that was simply out of the question in their situation.

For a moment Daniel wondered if Teal'c had known but knowing Jack, he probably hadn't said anything to the Jaffa, either. Daniel was pretty sure Teal'c had to have guessed his part or at least suspected something but apparently he had deemed it wiser to stay back than to glue himself to Jack's side in order to accompany his friend. Daniel wasn't exactly sure why Teal'c had done that, but he trusted his friend and his decision without question.

"You have to know something!" the Senator raged, interrupting Daniel's thoughts.

"Senator!" General Hammond snapped. "We have seen on the surveillance tapes that it was _only_ Colonel O'Neill who went with Major Carter! Neither Teal'c nor Daniel Jackson were anywhere near them!"

"That doesn't mean they weren't informed!" the Senator insisted.

Ignoring the man throwing a fit in front of his quarters, Daniel turned towards General Hammond. Rationally, Daniel could totally understand why Sam and Jack had decided to flee and he could even understand why they hadn't told him or Teal'c, but he was also aware of what kind of situation this would put General Hammond in. The poor man would have to bear the brunt of the NID's anger and Daniel sincerely hoped the General would make it through this unharmed. He had already raised suspicions because he had shielded Jack and Sam as much as possible and now with their sudden disappearance, Daniel could only all too well imagine the NID trying to push all the blame on General Hammond.

The General met Daniel's sympathetic gaze with calm, determined eyes. Surprised, Daniel noticed the other man didn't seem fazed in the least. Had he maybe already suspected something like this to happen? Whether or not, at least he didn't seem angry at the two fellow officers disappearing just like that and leaving him to clean up the mess they had left behind.

"I'm sorry, General," Daniel said honestly. "But I really don't know anything."

General Hammond nodded. "I assumed as much," he admitted. "Teal'c?"

Daniel shook his head. "If he'd known, he would have accompanied them."

"I see," the General stated.

"General, I demand that those two officers be brought back and arrested!" Senator Kinsey commanded furiously.

The General looked at him, mildly put out by the fact that a civilian insisted on giving him orders. "Senator, wasn't it you who said that it would be a waste of time and money to spend this base's resources on getting exactly those two officers back?" he asked, kindly.

The Senator spluttered infuriated. "Yes, but this was–!"

The General interrupted him. "Then I fear I will have to wait for the Pentagon's representative to arrive to discuss whether or not it is possible for us to spend the resources on these officers again," he declared matter-of-factly. "And until then I intend to catch a few more hours of sleep. Good night."

And with this, the General turned and marched down the corridor, Reynolds, Dixon and the SF's all smoothly stepping aside to let him pass. Then, one after the other, the military men went their own ways, all deliberately overlooking the fuming Senator. When he was finally the last one left standing there with the Senator from Indiana, Daniel shrugged at him nonchalantly, smiled sweetly and then tried not to enjoy the sight of the furious Senator stomping down the hallway returning to his guest quarters, thoroughly thwarted, too much.

Inwardly, Daniel was wholeheartedly cheering Jack and Sam on. Well done, he congratulated them silently. There really was no other choice for them than to go into hiding for a while to wait for the waters to cool. And Daniel quickly realized that, even with Jack's Special Forces training, there was no way they could have succeeded doing that on Earth. So why not use all the possibilities they had here and hide somewhere out in the universe, where Senator Kinsey had no, really _no_ , means of finding them?

Almost skipping, Daniel went the few steps over to Teal'c's quarters, banging on his door impatiently. Oh, if the Jaffa could have just seen this! He would have loved the Senator being thwarted by his own words!

While waiting for the kel'no'reem-ing Jaffa to awaken and open the door, Daniel's thoughts travelled back to his friends. He really was glad Jack and Sam had managed to escape just in time, but he realized he probably wouldn't see his friends for a long time. The thought saddened him, but for now all that counted was that they were safe.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

" _Here?_ " Sam inquired dumbfounded. "You want to stay here?"

Jack looked back at her, surprised by her outburst. "Why not?" he asked back.

Sam stood frozen in front of the now inactive Stargate, gazing down the rows of ruins before her speechless. They had made their way over five other planets to make sure the SGC couldn't track them down before he had finally told her the coordinates for their ultimate destination. Sam hadn't recognized the address, but then again they had been to so many planets that it was hardly possible to remember all of the addresses. So she had been in for a big surprise when she had stepped out of the wormhole and immediately recognized her surroundings. Of all the planets he could have chosen, why this one?

Gulping down the slight feeling of nausea that washed over her, Sam's eyes wandered over the vast expanse of ruins that lay before her. She had been here once before. To be exact, Nirrti had brought her here for her meeting with Ba'al.

"Carter?" the Colonel prompted her when she didn't react to his question.

"Sir… is this such a good idea?" she questioned while trying to get her body to move again.

He walked back to where she stood rooted. "Actually, that was the best idea I could come up with," he said. "The planet's utterly deserted and has housing structures we could use, even if they need a bit… rebuilding."

"Sir! Nirrti, Ba'al _and_ the SGC know of this planet!" she reminded him.

He grinned. "Exactly. Which is why they would search here last, right? Because it would be way too obvious."

Sam gnawed on her lower lip torn. He was right, this could work out, but they were gambling with a high level of risk. The chance they could be found here was high compared to choosing an unknown and uninhabited planet.

He sighed. "Carter, we couldn't risk hiding out with any of our allies or one of the cultures we've already encountered. The risk of being exposed, accidentally or intentionally, was too high. And we also couldn't risk choosing a completely unexplored planet without sending a MALP first to see what we would be getting into. So I had to pick one of the planets known to the SGC anyways."

"But why this one, sir?" she asked. "Why not one at least unknown to the Goa'uld?"

He motioned over the ruins surrounding them on all sides as far as they could look. "Because when we came here the first time, I noticed those structures were from the Ancients," he said. "With my now active ATA gene, I thought we could perhaps use whatever's left here to hide out in."

Sam nodded hesitantly. It could work, theoretically at least.

"Carter," he said, stepping closer and looking down at her with an intense gaze. "I know it is hard for you to stay here with the memories this planet has to bring back. If you don't want to, we don't have to stay here. We could always gate to another planet. But I think for tonight, we should finally settle on some place to crash."

She examined his features and despite the darkness of the night they had arrived in, she could clearly make out the signs of exhaustion on him. Dismally, but accepting his arguments, she nodded her consent.

Together they made their way through the ruins, looking for a place they could set up for the night. In the darkness it was hard to make out where to place their feet and more than once they stumbled over holes or slipped when the ground beneath their feet crumbled away.

Finally, they found a housing structure with its outer walls still mostly intact. The roof was completely gone and it wouldn't really serve as a good hide-out, but for this night, it would suffice. They sat their equipment down next to the wall closest to the Stargate, allowing them to keep an eye and ear at the device yet concealing them from view should someone come through the Stargate.

Sam dropped the backpack she'd taken from the Colonel on the ground and then carefully stashed the zat away she'd kept in her hand all the time. Meanwhile, the Colonel was busy relieving himself of all the things he'd brought. His backpack already sat on the ground and now he was unloading all the weapons he'd attached to himself, giving a few of them to Sam as he went. On top of her backpack laid a tactical vest he'd brought for her, but Sam hadn't had the time yet to put it on and seeing that they were settling down for the night, she wasn't about to do it now, either.

Sam reached for the tent to begin putting it up, but the Colonel shook his head at her. "Don't bother, Carter," he said. "Tonight, we'll only sleep with our sleeping bags."

She nodded in understanding and began to rummage through her backpack searching for her sleeping bag, hoping that at least for tonight they wouldn't get rain.

She laid her sleeping bag out on the ground and in full combat gear, she slid in, zipping it up. The Colonel dropped his protection vest and then followed her example. They both had their P90's and their combat knives lying near, just in case.

The Colonel laid down right next to her, close enough that their sleeping bags brushed each other's, and with a bit of grumbling, he got comfortable. Sam looked over to the bulky mass he was next to her and was comforted by his close proximity.

"Sir?" she whispered. "Shall I take first watch?"

He yawned audibly, before deciding: "Nah. Planet's safe. Get some sleep."

And soon, his even breathing told her he'd slipped into sleep. Sam was astonished how he could know if they were safe. Had he scouted the planet beforehand? Or was it an assessment borne out of the knowledge that the SGC had no clue where they had gone and that the planet had to be inhabited to serve as a Goa'uld meeting place for secret trades? Sam had no idea, but if he was of the opinion they didn't need the extra caution, then Sam was inclined to believe him.

Burying deeper into her sleeping bag, Sam listened to the surroundings. Everything around her was silent and from what Sam could make out, the planet seemed peaceful and harmless, but she knew from experience that this didn't have to mean anything. Torn, Sam stared up at the stars above her, enjoying the clear sight she had on this planet without any light pollution. Her brain was still spitting questions at her, asking her if she had really made the best decision, questioning her last choices and the consequences, but her body very much reminded her that, while she hadn't done much exercise during her confinement, the emotional rollercoaster she had been through those last weeks was still enough to thoroughly exhaust her.

When a big yawn crept over her face, Sam decided to leave it be for today. They had safely escaped and tomorrow there would be enough they needed to do, so she needed to follow the Colonel's example and catch a few hours of shut-eye.

Again, Sam looked over to the unidentifiable form he was underneath his sleeping bag. He had turned to lie on his side, one arm lying under his head, his back facing her. For a moment, Sam hesitated, but then she wiggled the inch that was still between their sleeping bags over to lie flush against him. Almost immediately, she felt better; protected and safe. Given that she was military herself, it never ceased to amaze her how she would feel so much better, so much safer when in his presence. She could kick ass pretty good all by herself, so she had never needed a man to protect her, and still she enjoyed the feeling of relaxing, of being able to let go of her military persona for once and be all woman, letting another care for her, even protect her. Only with him did she allow herself to show this little weakness; only with him she could allow herself to let go and be at ease.

Sighing, Sam turned her head, until it rested against his back, hoping he wouldn't mind when he woke up tomorrow. Then again, she could always say, she'd rolled around in her sleep.

His body warmth seeped into her and indistinctly, she could hear his steady heartbeat underneath his sleeping bag and clothes. Relaxing completely for the first time in days, she let the soothing rhythm lull her into sleep.


	32. Discovering

_**Author's notes**_ _: So sorry for the delay with the update! But as usual, thank you all for sticking with me, reading, reviewing and following my story!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Two – Discovering_

Sam stumbled through the ruins sleepily, having to suppress a yawn. Despite having slept in the Colonel's presence, her night had been restless. Sam had dreamed up a lot of incoherent things that had made no sense to her whatsoever. It mostly had been unidentifiable feelings as fear, worry, apprehension and the vague, but strong sense of being pursued. Almost the whole night, Sam had tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable enough to finally get a bit sleep, but unsuccessful. Once or twice she had almost woken up the Colonel, but luckily he had been exhausted enough to sleep through the commotion she had caused.

So Sam had almost been glad, when morning had come and she had to get up. Together with a rather well rested Colonel she'd eaten a quick breakfast consisting of energy bars and field coffee and then she'd set onto the task of getting a general idea what the Colonel had packed for them to get by on. Sam had rummaged through their stuffed backpacks and soon discovered that the Colonel had done a thorough job and they had all the bare necessities. They had a small two-men tent, sleeping bags, sleeping pads and blankets, MREs, energy bars, coffee, water and water-cleansing tabs, a few spare BDUs to change, two first aid field kits and all necessary survival tools, a few things Sam would need, including much to her pleasure her laptop and a few of her measurement tools, and of course lots of weapons and ammunition. All in all, Sam assumed they'd be set for the first days should they find sufficient shelter. Then their biggest worry would be food and water, but the Colonel had brought as much as he could carry and Sam estimated it would get them through the first days effortlessly.

Then Sam and the Colonel had made a plan of action, deciding that first they would get a closer look at the ruins and try to find a place for them to camp out in, and then they would try and look for water and food.

Which was why Sam was now trudging through the ruins, albeit a bit listlessly. Dimly, the Major remembered that Nirrti had taken her underground somewhere within these ruins, indicating that there were probably more protected structures somewhere underneath the surface, but Sam couldn't say where exactly that had been. It didn't matter anyway, because she was convinced that they shouldn't pitch camp somewhere Nirrti had access to and knowledge of. No need to challenge fate.

Stifling another yawn, Sam stretched and felt something in her back plop. Goddammit was she stiff…

Looking around, she tried to determine what the Colonel was doing. A few feet away from her he made his way steadily through the ruins, looking rather excited. Detached, Sam noticed that, for once, their roles seemed reversed; she was the one barely able to keep her eyes open, not really caring for the probably inestimable Ancient ruins while he was the one crawling around the ruins interested, analyzing them attentively.

"You sure there were structures underground, Carter?" the Colonel suddenly yelled over to where she stood, lost in her thoughts.

"Yes, sir," she confirmed.

Not far from her, the Colonel kicked a loose piece of rock away with a well-placed shove of his military boot. "And where?" he wanted to know.

Sam looked over to him astonished, contemplating why he even wanted to know. What would it bring them to know this?

"Don't know?" the Colonel asked, when she didn't respond.

Sam shook her head vaguely. It wasn't that she was averse to telling him, but more like she couldn't; her memories of the time Nirrti had possessed her were blurry at best. Sam had mostly concentrated on keeping anything vital from Nirrti and for this taxing task she had needed almost her whole concentration. She had been aware of a few things happening around her body, but nothing concrete. So while Sam was definitely sure she had been underground somewhere on this planet, she couldn't tell where that had been or what it had looked like underground even if her life depended on it.

"Why do you want to know, sir?" Sam asked back.

The Colonel probed the wobbling remains of a half-crumbled wall with a foot, while he answered: "Just thought it would be better to set up camp there. We'd be safe from the weather and any unexpected visitors."

Sam gnawed on her lip, watching absentmindedly when he began to climb a pile of debris that looked a bit unstable. "Are you sure about this, sir?" she asked. "Should we camp out somewhere a Goa'uld System Lord has inside knowledge of?"

"Nah, not _exactly_ there," he clarified. "But maybe we find some place suitable, if we go from there. I mean, Nirrti couldn't have had the time to scout the whole planet and its underground structures, could she?"

Sam thought his words over. He was right, it was highly unlikely. A Goa'uld wouldn't give one of their own planets away to another Goa'uld, so this meeting place had been neutral ground, meaning unknown territory to Nirrti as well as Ba'al. And with the only small number of Jaffa she had under her control, Nirrti had probably not been able to search this planet thoroughly. She would have used the first structures she'd found, which meant possibly the structures best accessible from the surface. Meaning, if they found the entrance and just dug a bit deeper, then they could probably–

Sam was ripped from her thoughts, when all of a sudden a suspiciously rumbling sound rang out. Surprised, she looked up, her eyes meeting with the astonished gaze from the Colonel. He raised an eyebrow skeptically and had just opened his mouth, undoubtedly to question her about what that had been, when suddenly the ground beneath him gave in.

Almost like in slow motion, Sam saw him drop through a hole appearing in the ground beneath him. A very clearly audible, nasty crash rang out, when he apparently smashed into something beyond her line of visibility only seconds later.

Sam's mouth went dry, her heart began to race and her loud breath echoed in the sudden silence that followed after the crash, before her head finally caught up and spurred her on to look after him.

"SIR!" she shouted surprised and carefully sprinted over to the hole.

Cautious of the instable ground, she leaned over the middle-sized gap and peered down into the darkness, but she couldn't see a thing aside from a few shapes.

"Sir? Are you alright?" Sam yelled down, worried.

A groan filtered up to her, followed by an infuriated "Oh, for _cryin'_ out loud!"

Sam exhaled in relief. At least he was alive, conscious and breathing!

"Carter?" he shouted up to her, sounding piqued.

Sam tried to estimate the distance he'd fallen down, but apparently he'd landed in some kind of hall, because the echoes from his voice made it impossible for her to even locate his position, let alone the distance between them.

"Yes, sir?" she answered routinely.

She heard him huff enraged somewhere beneath her. "The fucking ground beneath me gave in!" he exclaimed annoyed.

Sam couldn't help herself, she snorted. If he was still cracking jokes, then he couldn't be hurt that badly.

"I noticed, sir," she replied, before asking anew: "Is everything alright?"

She was greeted with silence for a moment, imagining him checking himself over, before he answered: "I broke something but aside from that, nothing happened."

He _broke_ something? Sam swallowed; that didn't bode so well. Astonishing that he still managed to sound so calm!

"Sir, what did you break?" she asked, trying to radiate calmness. She didn't want him to worry should he hear the alarm in her voice.

"Hm," he mumbled. "Don't know exactly. Looks like something shiny that was probably important, but you'll have to have a look at it, Carter. I'm no good with computers."

For a moment Sam thought he'd gone nuts. Or had seriously injured his head and was now talking rubbish. Then it dawned on her that he hadn't broken something on himself, but rather had smashed something beneath him, when he'd crashed through the roof…

Sam exhaled relieved, while simultaneously slapping a hand to her forehead. Really, sometimes the man was just too much! Couldn't he have phrased it differently, so she wouldn't have to worry? Idly, Sam pondered if it could be seen as an insubordinate move if she kicked her CO while, technically speaking, she was still in confinement. Most likely, yes. Damn. Right now, she felt he'd earned it.

"Y'know what, Carter?" he continued from beneath her, oblivious to her angry thoughts. "I'm goin' to search for the stairs, so you can come down with me and get a look at it."

"Yes, sir, you do that…" she agreed halfheartedly, while retreating a few feet from the hole he'd created to wait for him to emerge from somewhere.

It took the Colonel over an hour, until he finally emerged. Sam used the time to cover up the hole he had created as best as possible. She didn't want any possible visitors to this planet to see where they had gone and, considering the possibility they could still decide to stay on this planet, Sam wanted to ensure, neither of them would risk breaking through the ground here once again. When she was finished though, satisfied with what she had achieved, she had nothing else to do but sit and wait for him to come and get her.

Sam didn't like it. She usually wasn't one to sit around idly and do nothing, but nowadays it felt worse. Whenever Sam had the time to sit and ponder her situation, considering how much her life had changed in the last weeks and contemplating all that had happened, she felt like jumping out of her skin. It left her with a buzzing, nervous energy and an unsettling, uncomfortable feeling in her gut that just made her yearn for something to do, so she could push all those thoughts away. She needed something to distract her, needed the diversion almost desperately, because she didn't feel prepared to go over all that had happened just yet. She just wanted some distance to everything. She couldn't deal with the whole emotional rollercoaster just yet and sometimes she wondered when she would actually ever be able to. She knew it wouldn't do her any good to suppress the memories and the whole backlog of feelings attached to it, but right now, she had enough. She wanted a bit peace of mind. She wanted to feel at ease for once and it made Sam long to work at something. If she'd been in the SGC – and not under arrest – she would have buried herself in her lab for two or three days and then would have emerged rested and at peace with herself, her head having worked through everything, while she had simultaneously caught up with all the projects that had accumulated in her absence. This would have her feeling satisfied and useful, but having been placed in confinement had ripped her from this possibility. She had had days for nothing but thinking and Sam had done her best to avoid that. She didn't want to ponder, afraid of what her head would come up with, so she had decided then that, if she wanted to stay sane, she needed to stop thinking for once.

And then her whole life had been turned upside down. Without really thinking it through or trying for another solution, she had fled with the Colonel. She had _deserted_.

Sam sighed. Even the thought hurt her. It hurt her military pride and her sense of duty, but what other option had she really had? What other choice had they left them with? They had driven her and the Colonel into a corner. The only choices they had left had been to submit to the possibly life-long examinations, giving the rest of their lives over to the Air Force, or to run. He had chosen running and Sam could fully understand. The Colonel wasn't the type to accept others deciding over or for him. She however wasn't the type to defy orders, at least not normally. As with the Hathor-incident, she had previously chosen to disobey orders, feeling that she had no other choice to protect her country and her planet, but then she had been thinking she was acting for the greater good and had still had a decidedly bad conscience. Now she was only acting selfish, thinking of nothing but her own good. She had defied orders for her own, personal wellbeing and that was something she had sworn she would not do. The military and her country – and now her planet – came before all. She had no personal life as long as the USAF needed her otherwise. And she had deserted.

Sam knew they probably could never go back anyways, so sitting here, worrying herself stupid over what she had done, was pretty pointless. It was too late. She couldn't ever reverse what she had done. Still, she couldn't help but go back to these thoughts over and over again.

After half an hour Sam had taken up restless pacing, hoping that the movement would help her drown out her spinning mind, but no such luck. If anything, the steady movements helped her focus even more.

So Sam was really glad, when the Colonel finally checked in via radio. She had to search for a while, but she finally found him farther away down the rows of ruins, waving at her where he sat perched on a thick corner of wall.

"Sir," she said, when she finally reached him. "You really took your time, didn't you?"

He grinned at her. "Major, what do you think of me?" he inquired. "Nah, I got a bit lost down there. These ruins are ridiculously huge!"

Sam looked at him astonished. "Really?"

He nodded and hopped down from his makeshift seat. With a relaxed whistle, he began descending an old, withered stone staircase that disappeared in the ground next to where he'd sat. Sam watched him for a moment before she followed. At first, she was cautious with the staircase, but aside from the signs of age, it was stable. It was withered and worn out, but at least complete. There were no parts missing and while ferns and roots appeared between the stones, the underbrush only seemed to stabilize the used stairs.

The staircase led them down into a middle-sized hall. Sam looked around, her scientific mind picking up on details almost routinely. She recognized the familiar straight design with the intricate, but low-key embellishments in the walls that practically screamed 'Ancient'. Lines that were actually letters in the Ancient language ran along the walls, telling stories Sam had no means of knowing. Stone-gray décor was everywhere she looked, from the almost impenetrable stone walls to the carefully carved, but now half-rotten furniture. Everything that had survived the time since the structures had been abandoned was made of stone or metallic components. Sam had no idea if there had ever been something else, because all else would have been destroyed with the passing time, rotting away. Here and there, roots, grass and ferns had started spreading, indicating that nature was slowly reclaiming reign over the territory, but still Sam had the impression it didn't harm the structures. In fact, the Major thought if all structures underground were like this room, then they seemed more inhabitable and stable than the ruins above ground.

Absentmindedly, Sam walked around the room that somehow reminded her of a commissary or some kind of meeting place. Tables and chairs were everywhere, even if in a chaotic order and many doors seemed to lead from the room, but the heavy stone panels covering the rectangular holes that served as doors were closed firmly.

Suddenly, Sam remembered. She remembered descending into this room, while Nirrti had possessed her body and she remembered ordering the Jaffa to try and open these doors, but despite their age, not even one had budged.

"I've been here, before," Sam said into the silence.

"I figured," the Colonel replied, waiting patiently leaned against one of the stone tables, while she looked around. "It's the only way to get to the surface I've found so far."

Sam turned to look back to him. "But, sir," she contemplated out loud. "Nirrti's Jaffa tried to open the doors, but they couldn't. How did you get here?"

With an impossibly wide smirk, Jack pushed away from his waiting point and rubbing his hands in glee, he said: "Oh, that's just the best! You need to see this!"

With a few steps, he'd approached one of the stone plates locking up one of the exits. When he came closer, a soft white light seemed to appear around the door, lighting up the frame. The carved writings on the stone around the door flickered almost unnoticeably, a few letters lighting up a bit brighter and then, just like that, the door slid back smoothly.

Standing in the now open door, the Colonel spread his arms widely and with a smug smirk, he told Sam: "I'm beginning to like this Ancient gene!"

Sam narrowed her eyes skeptically at the picture she was presented with. The Colonel didn't seem to notice, but Sam was actually surprised this had worked. Almost all ancient technology they had encountered until now had been genetically locked to function only for the right users; humans that had descended from the Ancient race and thus carried their genes. So it actually wasn't that astonishing that he could open these doors while Nirrti's Jaffa had failed. What had Sam thinking were simple, unspectacular details. She had seen the force Nirrti's Jaffa had used on these doors and now that the Colonel was standing in the frame, Sam could see how thick those doors actually were. Although the heavy stone moved effortlessly, the doors had the width of two humans standing next to each other. Sam figured such thick doors were no ordinary doors. Those were doors installed for security and protection, much like the blast doors at Cheyenne Mountain. Whatever these ruins were, they had been built to protect something and this would ensure the highest precaution and security measures. So it would probably only have restricted access.

Sam was aware that the Ancients differentiated on who could use what of their technology. The Stargate, for example, was accessible for all races out there in all galaxies, so it had most likely always been intended for common use. Other Ancient devices however had been more difficult to handle. No normal humans like Sam herself or Daniel had managed to operate them; only the Colonel, who possessed the ancient gene, had had access. For example the knowledge repository they'd encountered that had only activated at the Colonel's presence, reacting to his ancient gene. And through the knowledge he'd gained from it they had gotten access to new planets that hadn't been in the Abydos cartouche. At that time, Sam had theorized that those were most likely protected planets; planets maybe not everyone had had admittance to enter, but only the Ancients, or maybe even only a certain percentage of the Ancients. It would make sense why they had been hidden in the first place, but Sam had no proof for that; it was simply a theory.

Then again, why even hide the planets, if not because they held secrets the Ancients wanted to protect? So the planets were most likely host to devices or structures very valuable and/or dangerous and thus had been placed under heavy guard. And the easiest way to ensure only the right people would gain access would be to strengthen the genetic lock, Sam thought. So how come a human, whose ancient gene had lain dormant beneath the overpowering and foreign human genes had access to what Sam deemed to be something akin to a restricted area? The ancient traits within the Colonel were present, activated even, but Sam imagined them to have gotten washed out over the centuries of gotten mixed with human genes, so how come they still functioned so well for the Colonel?

"Carter? You comin'?" the Colonel asked from his place within the door.

Snapping out of her thoughts, Sam walked over to him and together, they stepped through. They landed in a hallway, leading away from the room. When the Colonel veered away from the door, it closed automatically and upon his entrance, lights had lit up all throughout the corridor. Although they were underground, the soft white light was nothing like the artificial light Sam was familiar with from Cheyenne Mountain. Actually, it reminded her of natural sunlight enough to make her feel comfortable instantly.

"I'm pretty sure, Nirrti has no knowledge of _this_ place," Jack said confidently and Sam agreed. How could the Goa'uld? Apparently you could only enter, when you belonged to the Ancients.

Her curiosity picked, Sam followed her CO through uncountable hallways leading to various rooms of varying sizes. They examined whatever they discovered thoroughly and slowly a picture began to form for Sam. From the remains they found, she thought the structures had been excruciatingly well-equipped and protected. So Sam deemed it to be something akin to a military base, similar to Cheyenne Mountain. The above ground structures were sparse and not that heavily sheltered, so she believed them to be dispensable, most likely having been something like additional housing structures, storage rooms, meeting places or training facilities. What they found beneath the surface however was the heart of the whole site. Sam had to admit that she had been wrong. The first time she'd been here, she had estimated it to be a city from the sheer size of it, but this seemed to 'only' be a base, even if a rather large one. They found corridors leading to what had to have been small living quarters and hallways going to holding cells, but they didn't bother with these. If this was a military base, then there had to be something like a control center somewhere and this was their prime goal. They wandered almost the whole day through the maze of corridors and rooms before they found it. It was by far the largest room Sam had ever seen. It actually couldn't be called a room, she mused. This was a hall, even if not the one the Colonel had crashed into through the roof.

Stunned, she and the Colonel walked through rows of operating panels carved out of stone, rising out of the ground in various shapes and sizes, and machines attached everywhere. A large U-shaped operating board ran around the room, encompassing various work stations in its middle. A large, square stone cube stood to the wall the U-shaped workspace left free. From the size alone, Sam would bet anything that this was the heart of the control center, the most important control device, so she wandered over to study it. On top of the stone cube was a see-through, thick board made of glass or crystal and Sam could see colorful spots beneath it, hinting on the crystal wiring inside the device.

Behind her, the Colonel whistled impressed. "Danny-boy would have a field day would he have seen this," he stated.

Sam nodded absentmindedly. She circled the cube, eyeing it up interested. By the strategically and visually outstanding place this thing had received, Sam would bet anything this was the main operating panel.

"Sir, think you can try, if you can get that operational?" she asked, pointing at the cube.

"Sure," he said, walking over to her. While he rounded the rather large shape, he laid a hand on the cool, smooth surface of the board. Immediately, the glassy surface began to glow a faint, light blue. The Colonel ripped his hand away instantly, holding up his palms as if to defend himself.

"I haven't done anything!" he exclaimed.

Sam chuckled softly. "I know, sir," she answered reassuringly. "I think that just symbolizes the device is on stand-by."

"Oh," the Colonel replied. "So, what do I need to do?"

Sam was as clueless as he himself. They didn't have that much experience with Ancient technology after all.

"Um… as far as we know, Ancient technology works by thought, so just… think of something?"

The Colonel shot her a quick, skeptical gaze, but then closed his eyes in concentration. A low humming began to sound from the cube and Sam thought the device to begin working. Soft white lights lit up around the edges of the cube and writings appeared on the glassy surface of the quadratic device. Sam recognized the Ancient language, but of course she couldn't read it. Damn it, now they could really use Daniel, she thought, when the writings suddenly began flashing red.

"Damn!" the Colonel cursed softly next to her.

Sam looked at him, noticing his eyes were narrowed at the writing, raking over it as if he would understand the obvious warning it was.

"Sir?" she asked confused.

"It's not working," he explained. "I tried for the energy to get back on, but apparently, there's some malfunction."

Sam's eyes switched between his displeased expression and the calmly flashing warning on the glassy display on top of the cube.

"Sir, can you… read that?" Sam inquired incredulous.

He gnawed on his lip for a second, before responding: "Not really reading, Carter. It's not like I understand the language like Daniel does and I certainly can't speak or write it without the ancient knowledge in my brain, but I get the meaning. I understand what it wants to tell me, as if it would be English, although I essentially know nothing of the Ancient language."

Wow, Sam thought, that really came in handy.

"Sir, can you find us a map of these structures?" she said, feeling as if they needed to get an overview.

He looked at her, obviously mulling this over, when already a picture appeared on the glassy surface.

"That was fast…" he murmured, while Sam raked her eyes over the picture of the base she was presented with. It was from bird's eye view, showing them the base from the sky. Sam gaped at it disbelieving. The base was even bigger than she had anticipated! What they had been marching through all day merely seemed to be the center of the base with several wings branching off of it to all sides, giving it the shape of a large star. Again, Jack whistled.

"Um, try to concentrate on the heart of the base, where we are?", Sam asked.

Before the Colonel could answer, the picture changed to show them the rooms of the base's center, this time by cross section view.

"This working by thought thing really is cool!" the Colonel exclaimed, sounding pleased.

"Can you try to identify the energy controlling rooms, sir?" Sam inquired. "Maybe we're able to fix the damage to the systems…"

He nodded and then a certain part of the base began to flash green, while the rest stayed in black and white.

"The control room?" Sam asked and again, he got it pointed out for them.

Sam memorized the positions. The control room was, naturally, placed in the heart, in the middle of the whole compound. It was heavily secured with a whole level of stone all around it, and, strategically speaking, it made perfect sense, because above the control room, on the surface, the Stargate was placed. Sam saw emergency routes lead to the alien device, but they were set a good ways away from the control room, refusing direct entry from the Stargate to the control room.

Under the control room however, heavily shielded by another layer of impenetrable stone and secured by several of the thick protection doors, were the rooms that contained the whole energy supply. Sam nodded absentmindedly in understanding, familiarizing herself with the base's outline.

Suddenly, other rooms began to flash one after the others, the picture of the base changing from time to time, while the Colonel narrated what he was obviously looking up. "Private quarters… holding cells… life support systems… medical bays… oh, armories… defense systems… hangars, nice!"

Sam tried her best to memorize all stations and all ways to it, but she feared she would get lost first thing upon leaving the control room.

"Sir, we should check the energy providing systems out!" she said excitedly, scientific curiosity having long since taken over.

The Colonel took his hand away from the cube and immediately it powered down, leaving them with the soft artificial lights as their only company. With a habitual movement, he ripped the cloth from his wristwatch and peered down for a second.

"Sure thing, Carter," he agreed. "But tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" she asked disappointed, feeling thwarted.

"Yes, tomorrow," he insisted. "It's 0124. That's really enough for today. We were at it the whole day. We'll just find a cozy spot to set up camp and then we're going to sleep."

Sam gulped down whatever argument she could think of, seeing that arguing with him really made no sense right now. He had decided and if he felt she would just be obstinate about it, he would just order her to comply. Given, she wasn't really bound to follow his orders anymore, but she was pretty sure, she would anyways, out of habit.

"Okay," she agreed reluctantly. "How about here?"

She motioned around the control room. It would be the most obvious choice for so many reasons, she figured, so she was actually surprised when he shot that idea down immediately.

"No way, Carter!" he denied her.

Puzzled, she stared at him. "Um… why not, sir?" she asked. "It would be the safest place and would give us all tactical advantages the planet has."

"No," he repeated. "Tomorrow you'll be all over these things and I have to watch all day, so at least during the night I want to have some peace and rest! No doohickeys in my future bedroom!"

Sam's eyebrows shot up surprised, her mouth falling slightly open. _What?_ Was he serious? Hell, it wasn't as if they were moving in together and debating whether or not she'd get to place her work desk in their bedroom! It was about their safety on this planet!

"Sir–" she protested, but without success. He interrupted her almost immediately: "No doohickeys! No devices!"

They stood opposite of each other, gazing each other up and down, trying to determine, who would rather give in. Finally, Sam sighed. "Alright. But let's choose a room close to the control center? So we have immediate access should we ever need it."

"Gladly," he smiled and then motioned for one of the doors. "Lead the way, Major."

Rolling her eyes exasperated at his antics, Sam took point, leading them from the room in search for suitable quarters.

* * *

 _A/N: Loosely based on my very own personal theory that the Ancients had to have been a considerably strong and powerful military force once due to their superior knowledge and technology before they reached their ascended states. No actual facts in accordance with the show as far as I know, though. Also, I don't know all that much about ancient technology so I may have taken a few liberties here; think of it as writer's freedom?_


	33. Adjusting

_**Author's note**_ _: As usual, thank you all so much for reading, following and reviewing!  
_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Three – Adjusting_

Sam wanted to run. She felt the overwhelming urge within every muscle of her body, her legs itching to flee. But she couldn't. Something was weighing her down, dragging her down; keeping her in place. She tried to get free, to shake it off, but the more she struggled, the more it was restricting her. Sam felt alarm crawl up on her. She _needed_ to get away.

Twisting and turning, she tried to get free somehow, but there really was no escape. Her breathing quickened and her heart began to thunder with panic that rushed through her body, leaving her gasping. She tried to look around, tried to discern where she was and what was happening around her, but there was nothing. Everything was dark around her, all shapes blurred and unidentifiable. _Where was she?_

Sam tried calling out for help. Maybe there was someone close by? She screamed and yelled to the best of her abilities, but there were only dim sounds escaping her throat. What was wrong with her voice? She waited, trying to reign in the panic that threatened to crush her body, hoping someone had heard her and would come. But then, suddenly, she knew she was all alone. There was no one there. Nobody would come for her. She was alone.

Now panic turned into fear; crushing fear for her life that gripped her almost painfully. Sam struggled to draw in breath. Whatever was weighing her down was strengthening, holding her so tight Sam feared bones might break beneath the force. She… she was already injured, wasn't she? There was pain. Now she could feel it accurately. So much pain!

Sam tried to twist away, tried to escape from the pain, but she couldn't move. She had no means of helping herself, of defending herself somehow. She tried to hold on to her logic, tried to not lose all control, but everything felt like slipping from her, no matter how much she clung to it. Sam felt tears sting her eyes and sweat break out along her body. Help, she begged inwardly, all the while knowing somehow that there was no one there who could or would help her. She was trapped with no way out. She couldn't escape, no matter how much she tried.

The restricts around her tightened even more and suddenly Sam couldn't breathe anymore. Panicky, she fought, but nothing changed. Frantic, she tried to get air back into her lungs, but it wouldn't succeed. Again, pain emerged, her lungs burning and her throat constricting. Her body began seizing and cramping, and then Sam felt like falling. She fell, her body not working anymore, refusing all her commands and denying her whatever she begged of it, and then Sam had to ask herself, if now it was all over and she had…

Sam shot up. Panting heavily, she sat disorientated, trying to connect to what had actually happened. Her chest heaved with the heavy gasps she sucked in greedily and her pulse thundered, leaving her heartbeat to echo in her ears. Sweat had drenched her shirt and ran down her temples and her legs were knotted in what Sam made out to be her blanket by patting it down with shaking hands. For a moment she was utterly confused but then she realized she had just had a nightmare!

Shakily Sam laid back down onto her sleeping bag, which, together with her sleeping pad, protected her from the cold of the ground beneath her. Exhaling controlled, she raked a hand through her messy hair, trying to calm herself down.

God, it wasn't uncommon for her to have nightmares after particularly rough missions, but this here? This was new.

She had been dreaming up a lot of hazy, unconnected crap the last nights, too, but not to this extent! Sam sighed, knowing what it meant. It was getting worse. Her tactic of ignoring everything wasn't working anymore. It was breaking through in her dreams, ripping her from sleep about every two hours and taking every chance to get some much-needed rest from her. By now she was so exhausted, she felt like falling asleep while walking.

When her breathing had finally slowed down considerably, Sam looked around. The space on her left side was empty, indicating that the Colonel was already up. Thank god for small mercies, she sighed inwardly. At least he hadn't witnessed it. Sam highly feared that, some time, she would wake him up with the trashing she did at night, but so far he hadn't given away he was aware of what was going on. And it was better like that. Sam just needed some time and she'd be back to normal. No need to worry him.

How late was it, she wondered. If the Colonel was already awake…?

Sam reached out to her right, rummaging through her things spread out there, until she took hold of her wristwatch. With still shaking fingers, she ripped the cloth away and quickly checked the time. 0847. Wow, she had no idea, when she'd last slept this long! Even if you couldn't really call that sleeping…

Sighing, Sam sat back up. She should probably get back to work. She still felt out of it, but they had more pressing problems than her mind slowly going nuts. Since they had set up camp two days ago in an empty storage room only two doors down a corridor from the control room, Sam had been working on the energy supply, while the Colonel usually busied himself with strolling down the large compound, exploring. And while Sam was still trying to figure out, how the energy supply even worked – still far, far away from actually fixing it – the Colonel had discovered a PA system with which he could call in to her from everywhere within the base and had found a watering system that seemed to supply the base with water for drinking, showering and washing from a nearby lake. It had an elaborate cleaning system that made sure the water was filtered and ready for use and even recycled the used water, because Sam suspected that the base, if fully manned, needed way more water than the lake could provide, but for the watering system to work, Sam had to get the energy supply up and running first.

The Colonel had also checked out the armories, but much to his disappointment, they had been empty. Sam had guessed that the Ancients had taken everything they had needed with them, when they had abandoned this site, for whatever reason.

Sam knew that he still wanted to do a sweep on the medical bays and the hangars. She really would have liked to accompany him, but the energy supply was more important. If she wouldn't get it running soon, they would have to leave the base. Their water and food rations were nearing their ends and if they couldn't use those structures, they needed to move someplace else, where they would find what they needed. However, Sam was strangely reluctant to go, seeing that she had struggled with searching shelter on this planet in the first place. But Sam knew by now what the Colonel had seen by the first glance: this planet was giving them unique opportunities. With his active ancient gene the Colonel had next to no problem to run this place for them. By now he kept all corridors he had scouted and deemed safe and necessary lit up with light at all required times. First Sam had been puzzled how he'd managed this when the energy supply was down, but upon closer inspection she had noticed the lights weren't drawing any energy. It seemed to be some kind of reflective material that, once activated by an impulse, was able to power itself with small exothermic reactions. This also ensured that all rooms the Colonel kept operable were cozily warm, the exception being the room they slept in, because lighting up the whole room would be kind of counterproductive to the task of sleeping.

The Colonel also kept all doors open wherever they needed access. Sam could practically go nowhere on her own, because she didn't carry the ancient gene and seeing that he couldn't follow her around 24/7, he simply kept all doors from closing she might need to go through, including various emergency exit routes he had scouted and deemed safe to use.

And while the Colonel was apparently succeeding in everything he touched around here, Sam was getting nowhere. Given, she had the far more difficult task and the crystal wiring of the energy supply systems was complex beyond anything Sam had ever seen before, but slowly, she was beginning to feel frustrated. The Colonel had even thought of bringing her basic measurement tools, but understandably, he had concentrated foremost on survival tools and not her scientific utensils, so Sam even had to make do without the necessary instruments. She knew she was on her way to work through the wiring and she would eventually get behind their way of working, but she didn't know, when that would be. And if the Colonel was willing to give her the time needed for that.

Exhaling, Sam figured she should set to work. Untangling her legs from the blanket, she spread it out over her sleeping bag and then grabbed her combat boots, pulling them on. Routinely, she strapped the holster with her Berretta lying next to her backpack within their tent to her hip and thigh and then attached her utility bent. She left her P90 back, however. The Colonel still demanded of her to carry a weapon at all times and he himself still took his personal defense weapon wherever he went, but for Sam, her Berretta was enough as it certainly wouldn't hinder her from her work bent over dozens of colorful crystals like her P90 would.

Straightening up as much as possible within the narrow tent they had set up to shield from the cold that settled into the stony room under the earth without the lights on, Sam pulled her t-shirt over her head, frowning at it displeased. Another one she had sweated through thoroughly. By now she had no clean shirt anymore. They really needed to do some laundry!

Sam fished a BDU jacket out of her backpack, but before she put it on, she rubbed herself dry with her t-shirt. God, she really wanted to have a shower! She knew that with the time that had passed since their arrival, body hygiene was becoming an issue and her sweating through her entire attire during the nights wasn't really helping. Given the size of the base, the lake providing the compound with water was over a day's journey away, too far for shower or laundry trips and so they were both hoping for the energy systems to come back on and get the watering systems running.

Sam threw the dirtied shirt to a pile of clothes, where she and the Colonel dropped everything that needed washing and pulled on the jacket. She buttoned it up to her throat and then rolled up the sleeves, trying not to bristle at the unfamiliar feeling of going against the appropriate clothing order. She wasn't wearing anything but her bra underneath the jacket and this certainly wasn't what the Air Force had in mind for their female officers, but desperate times called for desperate measures, right?

Sam combed her fingers through her hair and then rubbed them over her face, trying to extinguish all signs of her rough night. The Colonel would probably see through it instantly, though.

When she finally felt as prepared as she could be with what they had at their disposal here, Sam opened the tent's flap and crawled out. She stood and stretched, working out the kinks in her stiff joints. Ignoring the closed door that led to the corridor outside the room, Sam turned for another door that led directly into the room left from their sleeping quarters. The door was opened as usual and light shone out from there. Sam padded into the room and wasn't surprised to see the Colonel waiting for her. He sat on one of the two empty metal boxes they had found in another storage room and dragged here, their camping stove at his feet and the scent of field coffee filling the room. Sam mumbled a good morning, which made him turn towards her, but unable to really face him yet, she went to where they stashed their water rations. Taking just the slightest bit, she hastily brushed her teeth, feeling infinitely more human after this.

Then she walked over to sit down on her box. Immediately, he offered her a mug with coffee and smiling at him gratefully, Sam took it from him. Again, she wasn't surprised, when the next thing he shoved at her were some energy bars. His dark gaze burned into her, so Sam didn't even think of arguing but automatically began to chew and swallow the power bars, trying to ignore their cardboard taste. At least they would supply her with the needed energy to work at the failed life support systems.

The Colonel watched her. She could tell, although she pretended to be busy with her breakfast. Sam had no idea, how much he knew or suspected, because he wasn't letting on anything, but from her experience, the Colonel always saw more than she wanted him to.

Mechanically, Sam gnawed on her energy bar, trying to come up with something to say so they wouldn't sit in silence, but her head failed her. Despite the fact that she had just stood up, she already felt sluggish with tiredness.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Jack walked down the corridor with a slight spring to his step. This base rocked! Really, from all those historic places Space-monkey and Carter had dragged him to, this compound was simply the best. There was so much to explore and so much he could set in motion with just a simple thought! Jack really enjoyed strolling around the empty hallways and rooms, seeing what he would find. He kept in touch with Carter through the PA system at all times, updating her on his discoveries, but aside from the water-cleaning system he hadn't really found anything worthwhile yet. Unfortunately he hadn't found any food, but Carter had said that was to be expected. Nothing edible would have survived the amount of time since the base had been abandoned, she had explained. So Jack figured, when he had finished combing through the base's center structures (because he wasn't really interested in tons of private quarters, holding cells, meeting rooms and training facilities), he would need to scout the perimeter outside, seeing if he could find a closer water source or hunt food for them. The rations he'd packed were slowly nearing their ends and Carter wasn't really getting anywhere with their energy supply. Well, she worked on it relentlessly, but Jack contemplated if, maybe, the systems were too advanced for even Carter to comprehend, at least without her equipment. But it wasn't as if they could just return to Earth and get that…

Jack rounded a corner and landed in what had to be a medical bay. Aimlessly, he began to wander through the large halls. Similar to the SGC, there were metal cots placed all around the rooms with cabins around them that provided privacy. Jack stopped slowly, looking at one of the metal cots absorbed in thought. They resembled the stony remains of beds Jack had spotted in what he'd thought to be private quarters he had found. For a moment, he contemplated transferring their camp to some of these private quarters. It didn't make much difference if they slept on the stony ground or the stony or metal remains of a bed, but Carter might perhaps want a little privacy? Sure, sleeping together in a tent was familiar from many, many missions they had done with SG-1, but it wasn't as if they would sometime break up camp and go home. They would stay. And given how large the base was, there really was no need to sleep cramped in one room. Still, Jack felt reluctant to suggest it to Carter. Given her relentless working, she obviously didn't spare a thought to their living arrangements, so it would have to be on Jack to bring the topic up, but he felt himself holding back for several reasons.

Shaking his head slightly, he decided he could always do so, when they would know if they could stay here. If they didn't get the energy running soon or wouldn't find any food, then they would have to leave anyways, so what would be the point in getting comfortable here right now?

Jack wandered on through the medical bay, his eyes raking over everything he passed impassively. Naturally, just like with the food, anything still useful had withered away, apart from some huge, honkin' machines placed throughout the various rooms, but Jack was cautious to touch anything. With his ability to activate anything in close range, he figured Carter should have a look at them first. Who knew what he would be activating?

"Carter?" Jack called out, by now almost habitually. He knew sensors in the walls would pick up on his voice from his mere will and transfer it to where his 2IC was working.

" _Yes, sir?_ " she answered, her voice ricocheting from the wall.

"I'm at the main medical bay," he reported. "There're a few interesting machines you should come check out at the next opportunity."

For a moment there was silence, until her voice sounded out, almost snappy: " _As soon as I have the time, sir._ "

He raised an eyebrow at her testy voice. What was her problem now?

Jack had noticed that her mood had dropped with every day they had spent here on this planet. He was aware that it was much he was asking of her, when he had decided on this planet. He knew it would bring back bad, dreaded memories for her, but he had also hoped she would see this as an opportunity to work through her abduction. Apparently, she did not. Jack had awoken a few times by her restless turning in the nights and so he knew she was having nightmares. What he didn't know, though, was if she herself was aware. He hadn't seen her wake up from them. Once or twice he had waited, staying awake to see, if she would snap out of her nightmares, but they had merely faded slowly and she had slipped back into sleep obliviously. She also never mentioned them when awake. Jack had contemplated bringing them up, but he wasn't sure, if she was aware of them and he didn't want to point them out to her. Maybe she was working through everything that had happened in her sleep?

Jack waited for a moment, but when his 2IC didn't say anything further, he continued on his journey. While he walked down the lit hallways, an unbidden thought crawled into his head. Was Carter maybe regretting it? Did she already regret she'd chosen to accompany him? He hadn't really given her any time to think it over, he'd practically forced her to decide on the spot. Maybe the consequences of her decision had now settled in and she had become aware of what it actually meant for them. They had deserted. They had left their posts unauthorized and disobeyed direct orders. They had broken a whole catalogue of Air Force regulations and robbed themselves of any possibility to return to Earth. And they hadn't simply fled to another country, where they still were under humans in their familiar world, no, they'd escaped off-world into unknown dangers and threats with only themselves as company. They had left back their families, their friends and their team with most likely no chance to ever see any of them again. And they had nothing here; they needed to start from the scratch.

Had she truly known what she had gotten herself into? He probably should have informed her sooner and given her the time to think it all over thoroughly, but he had feared almost constantly that it was so obvious how he was planning to escape, so he had waited for the last possible moment, not wanting to alert their opponents. He had trusted on Carter's abilities to see the important details, their way out, even if under pressure, but maybe she hadn't been thinking clearly with all she had had to undergo the last weeks…

But in all honesty, what Jack feared the most was that she had just left with him out of some misled sense of duty. Did she think she had to go with him because he was – or had been – her Commanding Officer? Had she thought him to order her to do so anyways? Or had she thought he needed her to go with him?

Jack sighed. The thoughts were hunting him, making him withdraw from her once again. Somehow, with no one being here but them, he had thought they might get closer again, but it seemed the rift he'd created by pushing her away just wouldn't disappear. They were the only two human beings on this planet and even though they spend their days and nights in the same compound, they almost never saw each other. The first thing Carter did in the mornings was to bury herself in the energy controlling rooms to work fourteen to sixteen hours without a break. He had stayed with her in the beginning, but seeing that he was always in her way and she would always lose her patience with him, when he began fidgeting out of boredom, he had thought it wiser to leave. Since then he occupied himself with scouting out the base, getting everything operational they could need. By now they were here for a week and they had said just a handful of sentences to each other. Whenever Jack made a careful attempt at conversation, she would shut it down exasperated. These days he felt he was constantly annoying her.

Jack had assumed that his 'brilliant' idea to flee the scene would sometime come to bite him in his six, he just hadn't thought it to happen so soon. Yes, he had basically and spectacularly crash-landed Carter's life. What had started out as the most promising career in the Air Force in decades had been stopped short by him. In fact, Jack had long debated if he should just go through the Stargate alone, because he had known beforehand that, if he asked her, she would tag along for whatever reason she had. Maybe it would have been better to just go and not give her the choice at all, but Jack hadn't been able to stand the thought of leaving her back, unprotected. Aside from the fact that he had promised Jacob he'd look after her (even though the retired General most likely didn't have _this_ in mind for his daughter), Jack was just unable to leave Carter to the concrete danger she had been in, without being by her side and supporting her. He had promised her they would go through this together, so he had figured she at least earned the chance to decide for herself. Apart from that, he wouldn't have been better than all her captors, if he suddenly started making decisions for her.

But was she now regretting it? Had she wanted to stay on Earth, with her family, her brother and her father, who'd try to visit her there, and her friends, with Daniel, Teal'c, Fraiser, Cassie, all those geek friends of her she had in the science department and all her military colleagues?

Slowly, anger began to spread within Jack. How come that, whenever Carter was concerned, he would second-guess all his decisions? How come his thoughts tended to spin in circles without actually arriving at any solution? He hated doubting himself, but somehow she always managed that he did so anyways! Oh, Jack was aware, why it was like this; very much aware, even. He was emotionally attached to Carter and this made him vulnerable to how she reacted. It was a risk falling in love always had. You attached much greater importance to this person's reactions and words than to any other's. Jack knew this and he tried to counter it with logic as much as possible, but he wouldn't always succeed. The problem was he and Carter were in the same line of work, and that just had to be the Air Force. Not even considering that any relationship between them was forbidden – even a friendship outside their work relationship was toeing a fine line – they worked closely together, on a small team even. He couldn't afford to attach that importance to her. She had to be like all the others for him, but yeah, he had crossed _that_ border long ago, hadn't he?

Still, sometimes he was angered by how _much_ he actually let himself get influenced by her, when she didn't even mean to. She wasn't acting any different or expecting him to pay some special attention to her, but still he couldn't help but do so anyways. If he felt it was time to leave an off-world site, he would make his team pack up, whatever Daniel was pleading with, without even thinking twice. When seeing her disappointed face? He would still usher them back unrelenting, but he would feel sorry that he had to break up her fun. And sometimes it frustrated him beyond words that it was like that and that seemingly he couldn't do anything against it. When had it happened that she had gained so much influence over him, when he prided himself on being independent?

Sighing, Jack turned into another hallway. At least he didn't have to worry right now, he figured. She was already angry with him, whatever he did or decided.

Actually, Jack was surprised. Surprised that she managed to stay angry with him. Normally the close connection he and Carter had ensured they couldn't stay mad at each other for long. They were so close to each other that the other one hurting was hurting them too, so they mostly settled any differences between them, in their very own way. Usually, when Jack would be angry at her, Sam would give him a few hours to brood in silence and then seek him out with a peace offering, mostly offering to treat him to cake or suggesting a team night with beer and pizza at her place. When she was angry with him, he would commonly trail her, annoy her until she finally exploded on him, then understand he should've better waited a day for her to calm down and finally, when she'd dumped her whole anger on him, he would reach out to her with one of his rare shows of the affection he harbored for her to placate her. It usually worked for them. They rarely were angry with each other for long. A week was long by their standards. Sure, she had been sulking a few days after the Edora-fiasco and he had been moody a few days after their initial encounter with the Tok'ra, seeing how she and Martouf had reacted to each other, but a week? Had to be a new record.

Jack looked up when the hallway he trudged down ended in a wide door as noticeably thick as all those doors here were.

" _Open!"_ he thought routinely. The door complied and Jack wandered through, willing the lights on next.

Then, gaping, he stared into the hall he was standing in. He was actually standing on a viewing platform that ran along the whole room's wall and he had a spectacular view on a handful of different spaceships. Ancient spaceships! His pilot heart soared at the sight, his fingers almost itching with the urge to go and explore. Hey, they could take a flight around the planet with one of those things to scout out their surroundings!

Oh, Carter would love this, Jack thought enthusiastically. Maybe it would help her to take a break from her work at the energy supply and get to see something outside the same room once in a while. Life wasn't all about work!

Jack raked his eyes over the spaceships. Most of them were small, their sizes resembling the Goa'uld's death gliders. A few were bigger, along the lines of an Al'kesh, and far in the back stood one honking big spaceship so large that Jack actually wondered how that thing was supposed to leave the base.

Wow, just the possibilities, he thought. If they had found this when he and Carter had still been at the SGC…! What they could have learned from these things! It would have definitely catapulted their X-project into the next century!

"Carter?" Jack called out, unable to hide the joy in his voice. He wanted to run down and hop on the first spaceship he could get his hands on, but many, many mishaps in the past had finally taught him to let his scientists have a look at any alien technology first before he would touch it in any way. Off-world, even if it looked like a duck, swam like a duck and quacked like a duck, it didn't have to actually be a duck. God forbid it could be that easy!

"Carter?" Jack called out once more, when his 2IC failed to answer. Again, silence greeted him.

Puzzled, Jack looked towards the walls. Were the sensors broken in this room? With fast steps he left the room and called out for her in the corridor. Again, he got no reaction. Then Jack jogged back to where he'd last spoken with her, knowing that _then_ he _would_ get a connection. But once more, nothing. She wasn't answering his calls.

Cursing, Jack broke out into a run, skidding around corners with more speed than healthy. He bee-lined for the energy controlling rooms, his hands firmly gripping his P90. Please, he prayed inwardly, please don't let anything have happened to Carter, while he'd been off amusing himself!

Only minutes later Jack braked down in the energy controlling rooms. The large halls were all open and connected, but still took up almost a whole story, so while he had a clear sight, he actually couldn't see her anywhere.

"CARTER!" Jack yelled worried, but just like before, she didn't reply.

With fast, impatient strides, he made his way through the rows of silent machines, trying to find out where she'd been working last. When he finally rounded a corner, he almost stumbled over her, literally. He saw her feet and legs lie on the ground in front of him and hurrying around the machines blocking the view on her, Jack dropped down on his knees at her side. She was lying on her side, outstretched on the floor, her eyes closed. His heart racing painfully, Jack crouched down over her and went to search for a pulse. He exhaled relieved when he immediately found one.

"Carter!" he called out once more, but she didn't react. Her eyes were closed firmly and her breathing was even. Jack understood. She was sleeping! She had simply fallen asleep…

Jack breathed out relieved. Of all scenarios he could think of this was the best possible outcome, even if he wanted to whack her over the head for worrying him like that!

He reached out to shake her awake, because while he was all ready to let her rest, he felt it wouldn't do her any good to do it on the cold ground between important, electrically charged machines. His hand hadn't even reached her, when he suddenly saw her body tense. Her eyebrows drew together tightly and her mouth set into a grim line. Her hands began twitching and her legs twisted from left to right and back restlessly. Her breathing became ragged and once or twice, her back arched, her head dropping back, until it knocked painfully into the hard ground beneath her. Jack recognized the behavior immediately. She was having another nightmare!

"Carter!" he called out again, laying a hand on her shoulder and gently shaking her. Unexpectedly, she grew very still under his hands, but she wasn't waking up. Gritting his teeth in frustration, he reached out with the other hand, too, gripping her shoulders and giving her a good shake. Her whole body was tense as a plank under his hands and Jack began to fear she had a seizure.

"No…" she murmured under her breath and then began to squirm.

"Come on, Carter, wake up! You're having a nightmare!" he explained to her, but his words didn't seem to register with her.

"No… don't…" her voice pleaded, barely above a whisper. He actually had to strain his ears to hear what she was saying over the sounds of her trashing. "No… leave… don't…"

She wasn't making any sense.

Now using quite a bit of his strength, Jack leaned over her, shaking her shoulders and arms. "Carter!" he all but barked.

Suddenly, her eyes shot open, but Jack could see, she still wasn't with him. Her gaze was blank, empty.

"Let me go!" she said, surprisingly clearly.

"Carter…?" he asked cautiously, reaching out to touch her cheek with one of his hands. When his fingertips touched her cold skin, she flinched violently.

"Car–" he couldn't even finish the word he wanted to stay. Suddenly energy slammed into him with the force of a wrecking ball. Completely taken by surprise, Jack couldn't do a thing to react in time. He recognized her psychic energy from his encounter with Nirrti, but that didn't help him to defend himself in time. He was hurled away from her, overturning from the sheer force, until he knocked sideways into one of the machines. Groaning audibly from the pain exploding all over his back, he dropped into a heap on the ground.

His vision went twinkle-twinkle-little-star on him and ringing sounded out in his ears. From the corner of his eyes, he finally saw Carter come to, sitting up slowly. She blinked disorientated and looked around confused, but he couldn't really be relieved. He could feel his healing abilities already getting onto the job, but still his whole back hurt like hell! The impact had been hard and while he might be able to heal himself, Jack wasn't made of stone. The pain was still a bitch and thoroughly distracting his mind.

He more heard than saw her crawl towards him.

"Sir…? Sir!" he heard her frantic voice, before he felt her place a hand lightly onto his shoulder. Pain shot through him at her simple gesture of worry and he cursed out loud heatedly. Immediately, she pulled her hand back.

"Sir! Oh my god!" she whispered, apparently becoming aware of what had happened, what she had caused. "Sir… you're hurt…"

News flash? He'd been aware, thank you very much!

Again, she reached out and gingerly touched something on his back. Concentrating on this exact spot, he noticed there was something sticky trailing over his skin. He was probably bleeding. Great. She really tried to be careful, he could feel it, but still, her simple touch hurt excruciatingly.

"Carter!" he barked enraged.

"Sir?" she answered, almost breathless. He had startled her.

God, he would heal on his own! He just needed a bit time, and, most importantly, no help!

"Sir, I just want to–" she began, but upon feeling her touch strengthening just the slightest bit, he literally saw red with the pain that shot through his body.

" _Get your hands off me!_ " he yelled infuriated. "Leave me the fuck alone!"

She shuffled back instantly, bringing distance between them. Good, that was better, he decided. Now he just had to concentrate on breathing, until his healing powers had done their job.

In the distance he heard footsteps. Carter was going. She left him alone as he had ordered her. Sluggishly, Jack noticed, but he didn't pay it much attention. He needed all his concentration to not black out from the pain racing through his body.


	34. Regretting

_**Author's notes**_ _: Well, last chapter got a few very contradictory reactions. A few of you liked it because it was realistic; a few disliked it for understandable reasons. For those of you who disliked it, well, you're probably going to hate this chapter. But I can assure you, it is necessary and I will make it up to you!_

 _As usual, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing, and special thanks to Dafidowndilly who's back to beta-ing and doing an amazing job!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Four – Regretting_

Sam sat on a stable stone wall, staring ahead at the sunrise coming up behind the Stargate. Her eyes burned from the light she was staring into and from being awake the whole night. Sleep really hadn't been an option for her; far from it.

Exhausted, Sam rubbed her hands over her face. God, what had she done? Whenever she closed her eyes, the vivid images returned and she relived the events that had happened in the energy controlling rooms. But by the time she had been cognizant of her surroundings, it had already been too late.

She had lashed out. Without realizing, her powers had activated due to the fear she had been experiencing in her nightmare and she had turned them against what she had deemed a threat when it had only been the Colonel trying to shake her awake. She had practically thrown him across the room, slamming him into one of the machines. She could still hear the solid machine creak in protest and see him falling to the ground, lying there unmoving and groaning. Sam had immediately known she had hurt him, even before she'd seen the red splotches of blood soaking through his shirt and staining his back. She had tried to help him of course; she had even tried to apologize, but understandably, he had been furious. He had ordered her to leave him alone. He had ordered her to go. He had commanded her to not touch him.

His words had hurt, yet Sam considered them the appropriate punishment for what she'd done. She had lost control and hurt the one person who mattered most to her in the entire universe. She could have easily killed him, she realized. He hadn't been anticipating an attack from her. What if he had landed differently; if it hadn't been his back but his head that had smashed into the machine? Despite his healing abilities, he could have died…

Sam practically choked at that thought and again, she felt tears sting her eyes. And here she had thought she didn't have any more.

She had attacked the Colonel. All be it unknowingly, but that just made it worse. What guarantee did she have that it wouldn't happen again? None. She was a danger, a threat to his life. And she didn't want that. She wanted him to be as safe as possible but how could he be safe with her near?

One thing Sam knew for sure, she needed to learn to control her new abilities and not let them control her. But how? She didn't really have any idea what she was capable of. Aside from hurting the Colonel, it seemed. Nirrti had obviously been able to control her powers but asking a Goa'uld was naturally out of question. So Sam would probably have to talk to the Tok'ra. They had almost all possibilities the Goa'uld had and they also had a few very good scientists. Sam didn't like the thought that she had just escaped from Earth's human scientists just to put herself in the hands of the Tok'ra's, but what other choice did she really have? She never wanted to see the Colonel hurt because of her or her powers ever again!

And maybe it would be nice to see and spend some time with her father. She could explain him what had happened and that she wasn't really a traitor, even if it looked like she had deserted. Talking with him might even help her to finally get a few of the things constantly haunting her off her mind like the nightmares she had and the constant state of alert and exhaustion she found herself in nowadays.

Well, one way or another, something definitely had to change! Sam couldn't go on like this anymore and she couldn't put the Colonel through her constant mood shifts and endanger him with her powers any lo–

"CARTER!" his voice shouted behind her, causing Sam to almost jump into the air. Despite having thought of him, she hadn't really anticipated him. She had known he would just heal himself and would be fine to go, but she still hadn't expected him to come after her. He had been so angry with her…

Feeling guilty beyond words, Sam tentatively turned to face him. Yep, he was _still_ angry with her. And, no, angry was probably the wrong word. Furious seemed more fitting. He practically radiated rage as he made his way through the ruins, stomping toward her. Sam had always been aware of the power and the strength his body possessed naturally, even if he did his best to conceal it. But now he was hiding nothing. His long legs strode forward, the muscles in his thighs bulging visibly with the strength he used, one of his arms swinging back and forth tensely at his side and the other gripping his P90 with such force his knuckles were turning white. His expression was stormy, his eyebrows narrowed over his dark, burning eyes and his mouth was drawn tight in a straight line. Oh-oh, Sam thought with trepidation.

Nervously, she began gnawing on her lower lip when he halted directly in front of her. He looked down at her, his eyes blazing.

"Where the fuck you've been?!" he snarled.

Oookay, she hadn't expected that. "Um… here?" she answered, motioning to where she'd sat thinking all night long.

"Here?" he echoed almost growling. "You mean, outside? Alone? The whole night? Without protection? Without your damn radio?!"

She was tempted to remind him that she did have her Berretta with her, as well as a knife, but that wasn't really his point, was it? And it would probably not change a thing about his mood. If anything her poking holes into his accusations would probably enrage him even more.

Sam worried her lower lip anxiously. She had to admit he had a point. She had just run, fleeing from his anger and from her guilt without much thought. It hadn't even crossed her mind to take her radio with her and neither had she told him where she'd planned to go. So from the looks of it, he had been worried and searching for her but hadn't been able to find her.

"I've been searching for you!" he confirmed her thoughts. "The _whole_ night! Combing through the _whole_ base!"

"I'm sorry, sir," she said abashed. "I just needed some time to think."

He snorted. "Carter, you can think wherever you want whenever you want! But I _expect_ to be informed first! I demand to know _exactly_ where you are at all times!"

She bristled at his choice of words, even if she knew what he meant. She didn't deal particularly well with being ordered around like that and it really was rare that he used his full CO-mode, especially with her, but right now he was too pissed off with her to care about her feelings on that matter. Sam couldn't help but stand stiff, almost at attention as she would be expected to do if he'd be one of those superior officers who gave a shit about that sort of thing.

"Yes, sir! Of course, sir!" she confirmed the orders almost on autopilot.

He narrowed his eyes even further at her submissive attitude and Sam could see the rings under his eyes. Seemingly, the all-nighter had done him as much good as it had her and Sam felt even guiltier.

"Don't you just 'sir' me!" he snapped, blindly lashing out in his fury. "Follow the damn protocol! We're still on a foreign, perhaps even hostile planet where various enemies could find and attack us, not to mention our own people, who more than likely are searching for us as well! Just because we're not exactly military anymore doesn't mean you can just forget about shit and do whatever you want!"

Sam knew he was right. He had every right to be angry with her. She had screwed up again.

Still, the words hurt. They cut through her like a knife, leaving her raw, open and vulnerable. Sam blinked against a new wave of tears threatening to spill. They meant so much to each other, were so important to each other and thus their words had the greatest potential to hurt the other. Sam knew that and she understood. She loved the Colonel unconditionally and that meant baring a part of herself to him nobody else got access to, but it also meant he could hurt her in ways others never could. And in addition, he was military, just like her. Sam always took great pride in her work and she always did her best, striving for nothing less than perfection. She wanted to be acknowledged for her accomplishments and she had dreamed of one day reaching the rank her father had gotten before his retirement due to his deteriorating health. So she had always gone above and beyond anything her superiors had expected from her, even more so when she was assigned to work under Colonel O'Neill because of her personal feelings for him. So him dressing her down, even if rightfully so, hurt doubly. It hurt the woman Samantha Carter because the man she was in love with was verbally attacking her, and it hurt the soldier Major Carter because he was questioning her sense of duty and her ability to follow orders.

"I'm sorry, sir. I will follow SOPs from now on," she answered quietly. Her chest hurt, constricting painfully. She began blinking even harder in a desperate attempt to stop the tears from welling up due to the dressing down he was giving her. She didn't want to cry in front of him.

"Damn right, you will!" he raged. "Carter, I _expect_ you to have your radio on you all the time, wherever you…"

He trailed off when Sam broke eye contact. She knew it would be expected of her to hold his gaze but she just couldn't. His image was swimming in the tears that were threatening to spill out so much she couldn't tell if the red spot on his cheek was smeared blood leftover from his injuries or color spreading in his face from shouting.

She couldn't hold on anymore; she'd finally reached the point where it became too much. She felt the telltale shaking of her shoulders that were giving her away and then a few hot tear drops rolling down her cheeks. She bit down hard enough on her lower lip to draw blood in a frantic attempt to stay silent. She didn't want to alert him, but apparently it was to no avail.

"Carter?" he questioned, sounding noticeably softer. "Are you crying…?"

She shook her head no, although the fact that she still refused to look at him gave her away immediately. He sighed and it strangely reminded her of a deflating balloon.

"I'm sorry, sir," she repeated, although she wasn't really sure what she was apologizing for now. For having failed to play by the rules or for breaking down in front of him when he was used to seeing the strong soldier she was working so hard to be for him?

"Is okay," he said. "Just don't do it again? That nearly gave me a heart attack…"

She could imagine him combing through the whole, large base frantically trying to locate her, while his fear and worry for her increased with every step he took. She imagined him calling out to her repeatedly and not getting an answer from her because she was outside the base. Of course he couldn't have known that, because she had failed to inform him and naturally this would leave him assuming the worst.

"Sorry," she said again, genuinely repentant.

"Yeah," he replied.

Then he stepped forward until he stood directly in front of her and his combat boots replaced the earthen ground Sam had been staring at before. She tensed, not wanting him to see her cry and also fearing her powers could suddenly lash out, harming him once more.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you like that, Carter," he admitted softly.

"That's alright, sir," she answered. "I certainly deserved it."

He shifted. "No, you didn't," he contradicted. "In fact, as I said, we're not really military anymore. You don't have to listen to any of my orders anymore."

She snorted, surprised she still could with the way her throat was all closed up. "Sir, we may have deserted, but while you can take the man out of the military, you can't really take the military out of the man. Or the woman."

She heaved a breath. "We're both military and it's a large part of who we are. It determines how we act and decides the way we do things. I, for one, don't want to stop being military, never did. I want to continue following your orders, sir!"

In fact a world where she wasn't serving under him in whatever situation was unimaginable to her. He was as large of a part in her life as the military was. And he was a vital part she couldn't and wouldn't abstain from.

Again, he sighed, but this time it had a beaten quality to it. "Fine," he agreed rather listlessly. "Now let's go back? I think we both need some sleep."

She nodded and waited until his boots disappeared from her line of sight before following him. He was walking in front of her, untypically not waiting for her to catch up with him. Was he still angry with her? Sam studied him from behind, absentmindedly noting how the rising sunlight highlighted his body stunningly.

No, she finally concluded from his body language, he wasn't angry anymore. In fact, he seemed more… resigned? He was walking as if all the energy his rage had formerly provided had abandoned him, leaving him drained and beaten.

Wordlessly, they made their way back through the ruins and then down into the underground complex via one of the emergency exits he opened with his ancient gene for them. In complete silence they trudged down the corridors, Sam walking a few steps behind the Colonel until they arrived back at the control room. Without even casting a glance at the inactive machines, they made their way over to the room they had set up camp in. Still silent, the Colonel opened the tent's flap and crawled in, Sam mirroring his movements.

She had just settled on her sleeping bag when she saw him fling his BDU jacket into a corner and then kick his combat boots off his feet. She watched him as he moved around the small tent. He still seemed on the edge.

He had just turned to give his backpack that served as a pillow a hard shove in frustration, when Sam couldn't take it anymore. She was exhausted beyond words but she knew without a doubt that she would be unable to find any rest as long as the air between them was this thick and loaded with the unresolved issues from the recent events.

"Sir?" she asked hesitantly. "Is everything alright?"

He tensed but didn't turn to face her. He stayed with his back to her as he answered: "I'm sorry, Carter."

She almost smiled as an automatic response. "As I said before, sir, you had every right–"

He interrupted her: "No. I meant for bringing you here."

Sam recoiled as if he'd hit her. _He was regretting that he'd brought her along?_

Okay, that hurt. That really fucking hurt!

Shocked, Sam tried to wrap her mind around the thought. She had always thought… She had always assumed he liked having her near. What about the 'caring more than they were supposed to' thing? What about their flirting, the teasing? What about…

Sam shook her head to clear it. Was she a burden? Had he realized now that there was only the two of them that they weren't good together? That they didn't match the way they always imagined they would? Did he deem it a mistake?

He didn't want her with him, that much now seemed clear. Would he be happier without her? Was he maybe even dreading the danger she could pose to him?

Sam inhaled deeply, trying to push back the hurt. She knew she was supposed to answer with something, but her head failed to come up with anything suitable. What should she do now?

"I was thinking of going to the Tok'ra," she finally said without any emotion.

Immediately, she saw his whole back stiffen and the hand next to his body fisted in his blanket so hard Sam could hear the cloth protest. He was close to ripping it.

"Why?" he asked, strangely calm.

Sam thought about what she wanted to answer. She certainly didn't want to tell him that it was so she could cry her heart out to her father and she also didn't want to tell him it was for possible training, because that would only draw attention back to the fact that she had attacked him.

"I believed it to be a good idea…" she finally answered lamely. "They could certainly help us and we weren't sure if we even wanted to stay on this planet…"

She was rambling. And even worse, she was still speaking in plural.

He apparently picked up on it as well, because he immediately threw back: "Well, you're free to go wherever you want Carter, but I'll stay here."

She got the message, even if he didn't say the actual words. He would stay; with or without her. He didn't care.

Sam was aware he was no fan of the Tok'ra, but she had thought she could at least speak to him about it. She thought it was a good idea to let at least someone know where they were; just in case. But he had shut her down without even listening first!

Again, a single tear slid out of the corner of her eye and ran down her cheek. She thanked his stubbornness that he refused to look at her.

He flopped down onto his sleeping bag and pulled his blanket over himself without even glancing her way. "You can leave first thing in the morning," he stated, effectively ending all conversation.

Sam stared dumbfounded at his back. He was throwing her out. She could sugarcoat it as much as she wanted but that was essentially the truth. He was throwing her out.

Sam stared down at her lap, realizing she was fiddling with her fingers, wringing them nervously. They had lasted a week. A whole fucking week, before they had destroyed everything that had been between them. She had been so sure. So sure that they would be good; that he would be the man for her. But maybe they had missed their chance. Maybe there had already been too much shit down the drain between them that now it couldn't work anymore. Maybe all they could achieve now was hurting each other. Or maybe they had never been destined for each other to begin with and it had all been her desperate hope and wishing.

Mechanically, Sam laid down on her sleeping bag turning so she faced the tent's outer wall. Breathing hurt and her eyes stung with even more fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. She curled into a fetal position, wrapped her arms around her knees and then pulled the blanket up to her nose, trying to muffle the slight sound of sniffles that escaped her. She didn't want to leave. She didn't want to leave _him_ , but she had effectively dug her own grave and now she had to lie in it.

Suddenly, the Tok'ra seemed to be the worst idea she'd ever had in her whole life, but it was too late now. She was as stubborn and proud as the Colonel, she was not going to beg him to let her stay. So Sam laid on her side staring at the tent, trying to control her ragged breathing and her crying, while praying fervently for sleep to claim her so she could escape the misery for a few hours. Before she would have to go.


	35. Explaining

_**Author's notes**_ _: Okay, so I obviously didn't manage the new chapter in time for Valentine's day, sorry about that. As you will see it would have made a nice match._

 _Still, thank you all again for reading, following and reviewing. Special thanks to Dafidowndilly for beta-ing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Five - Explaining_

Jack awoke from his light doze sometime around what would have been the middle of the night but given their waste of the actual night was probably sometime around midday. He was surprised he had actually managed to catch any rest, even though he still felt as if he'd been overrun by a mac truck. He would have bet anything that the all encompassing fury previously raging through him would have refused any sleep to claim him but apparently exhaustion had won out.

Jack scrubbed his hands over his face tiredly and then turned over to lie on his back. He cast a quick glance over at Carter but the tight ball she had rolled herself into was lying still and unmoving. Looked as if exhaustion had caught up with her too.

Jack sighed groggily, his eyes remaining on her figure huddled in her blanket. He had seen and later on heard her crying, knowing the emotional turmoil she was going through. He also knew he'd been harsh with her. No, he'd been an asshole but his emotions and the whole pent-up worry for her he had been carrying around had finally gotten the upper hand when he had been unable to locate her anywhere on the base and had downright exploded out of him in the only way he knew how to show worry when Carter was concerned: with barely controlled anger. Showing too much worry for a female subordinate was precarious and therefore Jack usually resorted to anger when his feelings for her became overwhelming, but this time his raging emotions had really bowled him over and before he had noticed, he had been hurling insults at her, even going so far as to question her sense of duty! Carter was an outstanding officer and he had said a few things he probably shouldn't have but Jack had simply lost control for a moment as the relief of finding her had hit him. Even more so when she had admitted she was thinking of joining the Tok'ra! It had been the proverbial gas to add to the fire. He had thought they were doing good and she was happy being here with him. Well apparently she was not. She would rather side with the snakes than stay in his company. Okay, given she had talked about _them_ in context, but at the time it had only enraged Jack further. He'd thought she was making plans for them behind his back, not even asking his opinion first. Maybe this had been why she'd been sitting by the Stargate? Had she intended to dial up the Tok'ra?

Now with his anger cooled down he realized he'd been foolish. Carter would never do that. She might have been toying with the idea of joining the Tok'ra but she would never relinquish their position without at least consulting him first.

Jack realized he'd gone overboard. She had enough shit to deal with; she didn't need his attitude on top of it all. Hadn't he originally wanted to help her through it? Well congratulations O'Neill, fine job you're doing until now…

Now wide awake, Jack sat up silently, not wanting to disturb her sleep. They should talk; no, they _needed_ to talk. They couldn't go on like this. With all the hard feelings and the assumptions between them they were only hurting each other.

Again he looked over to her and suddenly noticed something was amiss with her. Her body was tense and tiny tremors ran over her, so small he hadn't noticed until now. Jack leaned over and saw that her brows were drawn and her mouth was pressed together tightly with only hints of moans and whimpers escaping her.

He could tell she was having another nightmare. Sympathy overwhelmed him and without thinking he reached out and pulled her over so she came to lie on her back. She jerked and wary of what had happened the last time, Jack let go of her immediately.

"Carter?" he called out to her.

She didn't react. He tried it again, louder this time but still nothing. Instead she began thrashing, her legs kicking out and her head turning from side to side. Again he reached out unable to see her suffer but when he touched her she began mumbling: "No… don't! Please!"

He had no idea what she was dreaming but only one look at her torn expression told him all he needed to know and that was that he needed to wake her up somehow.

"Carter!" he tried anew and then: "SAM!"

She twitched but apparently exhaustion had a firm grip on her, refusing to let her wake up. "No… let me… go… no… don't want…" she whispered as a tear spilled from her eye.

Jack racked his brain. She wasn't reacting to his voice and he couldn't shake her awake seeing how that had worked the last time but somehow he needed to pull her out of this nightmare, so what options had he left to help her? Obviously touching her was a bad idea and given the experiences she had to relive in her dreams, Jack could understand why she would react so badly to touch but he still needed to bring her out of this. He would have to do something unexpected in order to jolt her out of her dream; something she wouldn't perceive as threatening, but what?

Suddenly an idea took root. Risky, but worth a try he figured. The worst case she would attack him again but at least this time he was forewarned.

Cautiously, he leaned over Sam until he was level with her head. He waited for a second, testing how she was reacting to his close proximity but again she didn't let on that she knew he was close.

"Carter?" he asked right above her. From this position he noticed her lower lip was split, probably bitten through by her own teeth.

She frowned but otherwise wasn't reacting, so Jack set to act. He lowered his head and carefully pressed his lips to hers, inwardly praying the action was different enough from all the other kind of touches she'd experienced to be seen as friendly and unthreatening. For a moment he waited, preparing himself to get attacked again but nothing happened. Then carefully and gently he began moving his lips, kissing her. Another second passed and nothing happened before Jack felt Sam relax beneath him. The tension seeped out of her body and her breathing slowed. The whimpers disappeared and her restless tossing and turning stopped almost immediately. He felt her eyelashes flutter against his cheek and understood that she was hovering somewhere between sleep and awareness. She groaned disorientated, obviously trying to understand what happened but then completely unexpected, Jack felt her kiss him back. Her movements were slow and sluggish, trying to follow his lead in her sleep-befuddled state more so than really reacting to his actions. He grunted simply from the feel of kissing her and had to actively remind himself that she wasn't aware what was going on, which was why he could _not_ deepen the kiss.

"Jack…" she whispered against his lips, recognizing him subconsciously.

He pushed against her a bit tighter, pressing his lips just the slightest bit more against hers. He just couldn't help himself. "Yes," he answered in between their light kisses to tell her he was here with her.

Again, her lashes fluttered and he knew she was opening her eyes. He retreated, breaking their kiss to look into her eyes. Confused, she looked up at him confused, blue eyes wide and red-rimmed with the signs of her crying.

"Sir?" she asked puzzled.

Damn, 'Jack' had sounded so much better but again they were back to 'sir'.

"You were having a nightmare and nothing I tried got you to wake up," he apologized, slightly embarrassed.

Her eyes widened even more. "Sir, you shouldn't!" she said. "What if I… again…?"

He knew what she was trying to say. She was scared she could attack him again.

"Don't worry, Carter," he soothed. "You won't hurt me."

"I already have," she reminded him.

He could see the guilt clearly in her eyes. "Because I wasn't prepared," he replied. "I've faced your powers before with Nirrti and I was able to counter them. But with you, I was simply… careless."

Again she began nibbling on her lower lip but to Jack's relief she missed the injured spot. "I don't want you to have to… watch out around me," she admitted.

"I'm not," he said.

For a moment they just looked at each other before he noticed fresh tears welling up in her eyes even though she didn't let them fall. Still, he felt himself melt to her discomfort.

Jack wanted to groan. If it hadn't been already crystal clear, it would be now. They really needed to talk about things.

Lying down right where he'd hovered above her, he came to rest next to her with half his upper torso leaning over her. He held his face right above hers so he could look her straight into the eyes and held himself up with his elbows placed on the sleeping bag at her sides, careful so she wouldn't be burdened with his weight.

Sam drew in a ragged breath and then, slowly, he felt her arms go up, the warm palms of her hands resting lightly, hesitantly on his sides, right beneath his ribs where his torso was brushing the blanket over her chest. She inhaled deeply and he could clearly see there was something bothering her.

"What is it, Carter?" he inquired when she seemed to fish for words.

"I don't want to go!" she blurted out.

Go? For a second, Jack was confused until he remembered their heated argument and the moment she'd brought up the Tok'ra, getting him to snap. He almost sighed. Now that the frustration and the pent-up anger from last night had abated, Jack knew there was no way it was going down like that.

"Carter, you're not going anywhere I'm not going," he assured her. And he meant it. He really, really didn't want to but if she wanted to visit the Tok'ra, he would accompany her.

"In this together," he reminded her.

She nodded, almost moving his head with hers due to their close proximity. "Thank you, sir."

"You have nothing to thank me for," he answered and then wanted to know: "Why did you even want to go to the snakes?"

Sam sighed slightly, not even commenting on his insult to what they considered one of their longest allies. "Um… I wanted to… train. I need to gain control over my powers and since Nirrti could wield them almost effortlessly, I was hoping the Tok'ra could give me some advice. And maybe it would have been nice to see my father and explain the situation to him…"

Jack's gaze bored into her eyes, refusing her any possibility to look away. "Carter, as much as I can relate to the wish to see Dad again, I doubt this would be a good idea. We would practically catch him between two stools and force him to deceive Earth and the Air Force for our sakes."

He could see that Sam bit back an automatic curse that wanted to spill. Jack knew that he was right and as much as she would have liked to see her father again, for now it was probably the better idea to stay hidden to let dust settle over things for a while.

"As for training," Jack continued. "As far as I know, we've got extensive training facilities here on the base. Why not use them and train together, here?"

He saw her hesitation almost immediately and he didn't even need to recognize the guilt flashing across her features to know what she was thinking.

"I don't know if this is such a good idea, sir," she mumbled.

"Why not?" he questioned. "We've trained together before; it's just a… different set of skills we'll be working on this time."

Sam opened her mouth, preparing to object, and upon seeing her already form the words he added: "And don't you dare apologize again, Carter! You've got nothing to apologize for!"

"With all due respect sir, I disagree," she replied. "I've attacked you!"

He shrugged. "You weren't aware. And honestly, I've attacked you before, too. In fact, with my history of shooting you, you actually still have a shot free at me…"

"That's not funny, sir. And it's not a competition."

"Well, if it was, I'd be winning," he joked. "But that wasn't my point, Carter. My point is that we have a risky job. We're facing unthinkable hardships every day and we have to make decisions no one else has to do. We have to decide over life and death on constant basis. And as much as I would wish for it, I can't keep you safe all the time and you certainly can't protect me at all time, either. We can become a danger to the other. You forgave me, right? You said you understood. So do I. I'm not blaming you and I don't want you to blame yourself either."

She looked at him silently for what felt like a long time but was probably shorter than Jack thought. Her gaze was searching his eyes scrupulously as if she was trying to evaluate him and his intentions.

Then she whispered: "No hard feelings anymore, right sir?"

"Exactly."

She seemed to think for a moment and then said tentatively: "Alright but… for that to work I think we need to add something to that rule, sir."

Intrigued, he raised an eyebrow. "What are you thinking of?" he wanted to know.

Sam gnawed once more on her lip and Jack felt his fingers itch with the urge to reach out and stop her from doing that. But right now laying his finger on her lips would probably not do him any good. They really needed to talk and he needed to concentrate – and he really should just concentrate on her lips because of the words she was saying!

She looked up at him and then said: "We need to be honest with each other."

Jack felt his eyes narrow. He could certainly see where she was coming from with this. Carter wasn't stupid, far from it actually. Of course she would have noticed the rift and the problems standing between them and of course she would be aware that their biggest problem was their communication. Or rather their lack of communication. Whenever they actually talked about a problem they had it solved within minutes but they seldom did talk about it. They just bottled it all up in a faraway corner in their minds and ignored any and all consequences, just going on as if nothing happened. Still, in their line of work and with their kind of feelings involved there was only so long you could do that without getting the backlog to explode spectacularly in your face.

And Jack highly feared they had just arrived at that point. They had finally crossed the point where the boxes they shoved everything in they didn't want to or couldn't deal with between them for whatever reason were overflowing and about to slowly spill everything.

Now Jack only saw two possible outcomes: they could either go on and ignore everything and by doing so destroy anything that could ever be between them with the hard feelings arising, or they could try to do some damage-control and rescue their relationship. But then they would have to be honest with each other. No more repeating the same mistakes. No more hiding or ignoring things as they came up. They had some serious work to do and simply going on as they had always done wouldn't work anymore; not with all that had happened.

Suddenly Jack realized that they were at a very sensitive point. Sam had practically handed him an olive branch when she suggested they work on the shit load of things between them and she left the final choice to him. Whatever he decided, she would comply with it. If he decided this wasn't what he wanted, then they would go back to being CO and subordinate and he would probably never again be anything more than 'sir'. Jack took a second to contemplate that. With the way he was currently lying with her, almost resting atop of her with their bodies half-entangled, did he _want_ to stay 'the Colonel' for the rest of their lives? Did he seriously want to never get a chance to follow through on the tentative first steps they had achieved in the last days? Jack thought back to the small moments of emotional intimacy and physical closeness they had shared and felt a twinge at the thought of never experiencing it again. Never waking up next to her lying just that tad bit too close again, never seeing that happy smile cross her face when he reached out towards her with a simple gesture of affection such as brushing a finger down her cheek, or even never kissing her again in his whole life? Even worse, maybe he would have to watch some other guy get that opportunity with her? Jack's heart almost burned with jealousy although he knew by Sam's unchanging and waiting gaze that he wasn't outwardly letting anything show.

So what if he agreed? Jack knew he was crap at talking and even worse when it got to talking about feelings. But then again who would he try for if not for Carter? She was worth it. In fact she was the ultimate prize, going so far beyond his wildest dreams that it was almost scary.

Having made his decision, he let a small but honest smile cross his features that she mirrored almost instantly. "Yeah, let's be honest with each other," he decided.

He instantly knew he'd made her happy when her thousand-watt-smile appeared, leaving Carter beaming up at him with so much relief and happiness that Jack wanted to pat his own shoulder in a distinctly well-done-gesture.

Jack could feel the usual softening within him at seeing her so happy. He instinctively relaxed, suddenly feeling as if everything was alright just the way it was. Never mind that they were stranded off-world with no possibility of returning to their own planet with dwindling food and water rations and had mere hours ago scowled at each other furiously from their respective end of their tent. The moment she smiled at him like that everything was forgotten, nothing mattering any more. Yeah, it was official, he was turning into a sap. And he didn't even mind.

"So, sir… we're fine again?" Sam inquired hesitantly, breaking into his thoughts.

Jack knew where she was coming from with her question and yet he couldn't help but lightly bump his forehead against hers when he couldn't free one of his hands to playfully shove her in reprimand.

"Carter, we were never _not_ fine," he answered, huffing.

She looked at him with something between astonished and disbelieving. "Sir! What were you calling that _then_?"

He pursed his lips for a moment, thinking. "A slight disagreement?"

" _A slight…?!_ " she repeated, baffled.

"Yes," he grinned. "While I'm usually with you on things, it's been known to happen from time to time."

Sam rolled her eyes at his antics but the serious expression wouldn't leave her face, so Jack knew there was probably more to come. Patiently he waited for her to order her thoughts and gather the needed words.

"So, you don't mind… me being here, with you?" she finally asked.

Jack couldn't help his instinctive reaction. His eyebrows shot up so fast and unexpected, Jack feared they would disappear somewhere in his hair line but he was so surprised, flabbergasted even, by the mere thought that he had to bite back a few incredulous words. _Was that the impression she'd gotten?_ Then they really needed to work on shit! She had never before doubted him like that! Guess, he'd really screwed it up royally this time.

"Carter, if I didn't want you with me, you wouldn't be here!" he stated. "In fact, you would've never become or stayed my 2IC to begin with!"

She seemed to mull over his words for a moment. Meanwhile Jack tried to guess her thoughts from the emotions flickering across her face. He suspected she knew that he trusted her abilities, which was indeed why he'd kept her on his team. But this here was a whole different matter, wasn't it? Because this was in no way about the military; this was solely about them.

Jack sighed, feeling pressured to explain himself better. "Carter, if anything I would've wished for you to be able to remain on Earth because honestly? Taking you with me through the Stargate felt like I was ripping you away from your whole life. But considering the situation…"

He trailed off but she nodded, understanding what he was trying to say. He held her probing gaze when he continued: "I just thought you might… regret it sometime."

Now her brows raised in bewilderment. "Why would I regret it, sir?" she asked softly.

"Because on Earth you had everything: friends, family, a job you loved, a career… And here? Nothing but the prospect of spending your days in hiding and with me as your sole company. That's not much compared to your incredible life before."

She smiled up at him gently. Then surprisingly her hands left his sides and reached up, coming to rest on his cheeks. Tenderly she tugged at his head, pulling it down toward her even more. She didn't put any strength behind it, leaving him with the choice to deny her further contact should he not want it. Jack wasn't even thinking of rejecting her though. Intrigued he complied, letting her do whatever she was thinking of. His nose brushed hers and from the corner of his eyes, he could see her close her's. With a quick movement she tilted her chin up and her lips connected with his. Already half-expecting this, Jack instantly reacted to her, moving his lips in sync with hers. The kiss was slow, gentle and soft. For once the never-ceasing, overpowering passion between them was reigned in firmly and the kiss simply conveyed their true love and affection for each other. It was all about being close to the other, feeling the texture of the other's lips against their own, hearing the other's breath accelerate, inhaling the other's scent and feeling the other's body slide along their own. Neither of them felt any need to speed the kiss up; they were content with just familiarizing themselves with the way the other felt being held so close.

Finally Sam pulled back and sensing her retreat, Jack straightened up, once more hovering above her. The kiss had left Jack feeling strangely relaxed and peaceful. At last, he finally felt the ever-present tension seep out of his taut body and his mind finally let go of all the shit they had been dealing with. Surprisingly, it was quite helpful for Jack to just be there, together with Carter, holding her and letting go in her presence. He hadn't said much to her but he could still feel himself begin to work through the experiences of the past few months. Normally Jack never broached the issues of his experiences on such rough missions as their abduction on P3T-643 or the feelings and thoughts he had had at that time. His usual strategy was to ignore and repress all and simply continue on; to let routine and everyday life wash out any memories he didn't want to remember. He knew this was lousy coping skills at best but most of the time it worked for him. Ironically it was even this exact lack of skill that made him bounce back almost immediately after things that could have broken better men and made him vastly successful in black ops. But right now, just lying here with Carter left him with an almost forgotten peace of mind. A comfortable warmth coming from her body surrounded him and her strength made him feel oddly safe in her presence.

And this feeling only intensified when her outstanding blue eyes locked with his, gazing at him with complete honesty when she said: "There's nowhere I'd rather be than here with you, sir."

He grinned down at her. Without breaking eye contact, he shifted his weight to one side while he blindly fished with his right hand for his bedding. Grabbing hold of one corner of his sleeping pad, he dragged it over with his sleeping bag and blanket atop. When it finally bumped into Carter's, he let himself roll to his side, coming to lie on top of his sleeping bag right next to her. Before she could react in any way, he had reached out for her once more and pulled her against his frame, his arm automatically going around her to keep her against him. Now lying on his side with her pressed to him, he couldn't see her face anymore but even with her blanket around her, he could feel her whole body fitting against his. He buried his face in her hair and deeply inhaled her scent. He could feel himself relax more and more with the calming effect she had on him and again, exhaustion threatened to overwhelm him.

"You know Carter?" he drawled sleepily. "There's no place I'd rather have you, as well."

She chuckled. "Thank you, sir."

"Oh and Carter?" he continued. There was just one little, important detail they had to be clear on. "Drop the 'sir'!"

He could feel her tense, surprised for a moment. "Sir!" she protested almost immediately, making him snort amused. "Do you think… um, I mean… are you sure…?"

Jack chuckled. "Carter… We might spend the rest of our lives here or on some other alien planet and if you insist to call me 'sir' until the end of our time, I'll go crazy sooner or later. We're not even really military anymore."

She hesitated. "But we'll still act military. And somehow I can't imagine us ever stopping that."

"That's because we probably won't. Training in the Air Force is very thorough. But that doesn't mean you have to stick to the demanded military address for the rest of our lives!" he countered. "And let's face it, if we ever return to Earth, chances are the Air Force will have hundreds of other valid reasons to have us court-martialed to really give a shit about how we address each other."

She snorted, her breath wafting over the exposed skin on his throat. "Alright then," she agreed. "… _Jack_."

He actually closed his eyes, a feeling of complete peace and contentment flooding through him when she called him by his given name. _Finally!_

Silence fell between them but it wasn't awkward. There almost never was with Carter.

All of a sudden she wriggled her arm free to lay it around him. Jack felt her fingers fumble around for a moment and then he felt her pull his blanket over him. He smiled at the caring gesture. He couldn't remember the last time someone had cared for him in that way. He'd been alone for so long he'd almost forgotten how nice it was to have someone care for him that way, much less a woman or even a woman of Carter's caliber. In response, he dropped a slow and gentle kiss on top of her head.

When Sam was done, her arm remained around him, her now lax hand a more than welcome warm spot on Jack's back. Her fingers played idly with his shirt but he could feel her movement grow slower as well. They were both exhausted, tired beyond anything their bodies could handle and they desperately needed rest.

Absentmindedly Jack realized that this was actually the first time they had allowed such closeness between them since they had fled off-world. Any attempt he had started to close the gap that had started growing between them, he'd made when they had still been on Earth and now when they were free to do whatever the hell they wanted, neither of them seemed to have had the courage to take the first step. But maybe now they could try to work out what could be between them.

Deep, even breathing told Jack that Sam had slipped into sleep, probably without even noticing herself. Smiling contently at being able to fall asleep with her in his arms, he closed his eyes and listened to her breathing, letting the calming sound wash over him comfortingly until sleep claimed him and he also drifted off into a deep slumber.

* * *

 _A/N: The long-awaited make-up chapter! Not we're FINALLY getting somewhere…! I hope it turned out the way you all wanted it to._

 _I realize it is slightly similar to what happened while Sam was in confinement on Earth, so I just wanted to state that while they wanted to work through things, they haven't really had the chance yet seeing what has happened, and now they're stranded off-world and marked as deserters, which adds a whole new layer of problems to their relationship they also have to deal with. They needed to be clear on where they wanted to go from now on so I had to write another scene like that. I hope you don't mind._


	36. Repairing

_**Author's notes**_ _: So sorry for the slight delay with this chapter! The last days have just been incredibly busy…_

 _But thank you all for the wonderful reviews for the last chapter, and of course for reading and following! Special thanks again to Dafidowndilly for beta-ing._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Six – Repairing_

"So?" Sam asked. "Um… did you understand that?"

Just in time she managed to bite back the habitual 'sir' that threatened to escape at the end of her question. This turned out to be way harder than she initially thought. It also didn't help her case that the Colonel was sitting opposite of her while she was briefing him, looking distinctly to be in CO-mode which reminded her of so many briefings they had had at the SGC or on off-world missions that she had already messed up several times. She fell back into the deeply engrained patterns that had developed between them in hundreds of briefings and would only notice her slipup when he shot her a disapproving glance every now and then. He listened closely and silently to her explanations much as he had done in uncountable briefings but he was strangely insistent now that she was not to use his military address. Sam had actually never given it much thought until now, the Colonel had just always been 'sir'. She couldn't allow herself to let him be anything more than 'sir'. Even in her thoughts she had only rarely referred to him as 'Jack', therefore it was exceedingly hard to switch gears now. But since last night he simply refused to let her call him 'sir' even when right now Sam would have loved to return to the familiarity of military address. They had shifted from an uncomfortable distance between them to practically scowling at each other from all the pent-up anger to an almost intimate closeness in a matter of days and it left Sam slightly confused. Previously the Colonel had ignored her for months and she would have given her left arm to change it back but since yesterday all had changed again and Sam was having trouble keeping up. As of yesterday he was back to paying attention to her, even more so than before. He kept shooting glances at her or staring at her for elongated periods of time until she would become so flustered that she'd choke on their last field coffee or stumble over her own feet like some teenager. He would _accidentally_ touch her, creating small seemingly innocent points of contact when handing her something or adjusting the weapon's holster on her hip for her. He had never done anything like this before. Before he would have just told her to fix it herself or go get things herself because he didn't want to chance accidentally touching her but right now they were almost as bad as teenagers. They were using whatever excuse they could find to be in the other's presence or to touch each other. Actually it was worse than Sam could remember it ever having been in her teenage years. By now she was almost constantly blushing from Jack's intense gaze and her reactions only seemed to encourage him to do it more often. It would really have done Sam's nerves some good to return to the military address to give her a break until she could get those rampant thoughts back under control, but of course he would have none of that.

Sam stared at the Colonel sitting cross-legged across from her, his gaze for once intensely focused on the maintenance panel she had opened to one of the energy controlling devices they were sitting in front of. His arms were crossed in front of his chest, accentuating his muscles and Sam had to actively remind herself that it wouldn't help them right now if she were to start drooling over her Commanding Officer – even if strictly speaking he wasn't her CO anymore.

"So do I get this right?" he finally answered. "White crystals are the energy and we need them to light up? Oh, and red ones are warnings of some sort so them flashing is bad?"

Sam gaped at him, speechless. She had just broken down the complex crystal wiring of the energy controlling devices for him in – she chanced a quick glance at her wristwatch – one and a half hours and this was all he had kept in mind? Granted, she had been surprised by his unusually patient listening but if she had even suspected he wasn't keeping up, she would have interrupted way before. Now she would have to start from the beginning once more…

Again Sam caught herself contemplating why he even wanted to help in the first place when she could clearly see that he wanted to be anywhere but here. But this morning when they had woken up, completely entangled with each other and their blankets, he had announced that he wanted to help her with the energy controlling devices. To say Sam had been astonished would be kind of an understatement. Normally the Colonel wouldn't even look twice at such devices, much less offer any help with them. Sam had wracked her brain for an explanation but the only ones she could come up with were that he was either using it as an excuse to spend more time with her or he was running out of patience with her lack of progress – and neither of these options were really sitting well with her.

Sighing exasperated, Sam tried her best to not lose patience with him. He was making an effort after all. "Yes, the white crystals are the ones transferring the energy from one device to the other. The red crystals are a backup system. In case of energy overflow they will redirect the energy flow. It's normal that they will flash to a certain amount because there's a lot of energy involved and the devices need only a specific amount of energy depending on the task they are performing. But if the red crystals light up in connection with these orange ones here, then we have a problem. The orange ones are the emergency backup and they only activate when the energy will become too much for the devices to redirect and handle. If they ever light up then we're close to an energy overload and should probably leave the base immediately," Sam explained anew.

The Colonel nodded and briefly, Sam considered going through what all the other crystals were supposed to do once more but maybe that would only serve to confuse him. Maybe it was enough for him to know the essentials and she could work on the rest?

"Anything else I need to keep an eye on?" he asked.

Sam thought it over for a moment and then pointed to the blue crystals. "The blue ones are… sort of maintenance crystals. If they light up then something is going wrong within the device."

He nodded again. Sam knew that none of the devices in either of these rooms had the blue crystals activated. It had been one of the first things she had checked after all but she figured it wouldn't hurt him to know. Maybe something had changed since the last time she had looked? Or maybe the Colonel would find something she had missed? Slim possibility, but still a possibility.

He uncrossed his arms and leaned back on his hands. "So whadda ya need me to do?" he inquired.

Sam sloppily motioned around the room. "Um… why don't you just look around, get an overview of what's here and see if there's anything that stands out to you?"

With another curt nod he heaved himself to his feet and began wandering around the room, gazing curiously at the machines. Sam followed him with her eyes for a moment, observing him as he ran his eyes over everything. She knew what he would see because she had already spent over a week holed up in the vast space down here. The energy controlling devices were distributed in five different rooms but the rooms were open on all sides due to all the cables connecting the different devices. The room in the middle was dominated by the main energy producing device, a closet-like device towering over all other devices that constantly gave off a low, almost inaudible humming. In front of this large device stood a smaller control device that filtered all commands coming from the control room above and distributed the signals to the respective devices. All other devices around those two center pieces were back-up systems, maintenance systems and storage systems that controlled and optimized the flow of energy. Sam had wondered why there were so many devices but considering the vast amount of energy needed for a base this large, she figured that they were the bare minimum. In case one or even two devices were to fail, the remaining devices needed to be able to cope with the high amount of energy.

First thing when she started working on the energy control, Sam had checked all backup systems. She didn't want to chance bringing the energy back online only to have the generators overload and explode because the redirecting systems weren't working. Sam had also thoroughly checked each and every crystal as well as all the connecting cables and had stumbled over nothing out of order. Everything seemed to function just as it was supposed to do. If she didn't know it any better, she would have guessed the Ancients had just left and merely shut things down. Nothing seemed damaged or broken. The reason why the highly developed race had abandoned this outstanding base had certainly not been the energy supply failing.

Sighing, Sam turned back to her laptop to work on her own tasks. She thanked all the heavens that Jack had thought to bring her laptop along. While she was missing quite a few of her measuring tools, at least he had been thoughtful enough to bring her laptop with which she could compare the data she could pick up and calculate any possible outcomes.

By now Sam really was at her wit's end. She had exhausted all the possible issues and no idea anymore where the fault with the machines could lie. From what she could tell, the machines simply refused to work and for no apparent reason. They were all in perfect shape considering their age and the amount of time they'd lain in a dormant state.

But without an obvious malfunction of any kind to repair, Sam slowly began to fear she had met her match in those machines. Maybe this really was too advanced for her to do anything about it.

"Um, Carter…?" the Colonel's wary voice suddenly cut into her thoughts.

Sam looked up, her gaze purposefully searching the room until she made out his large frame standing in front of the energy producing device. He stood half-turned to the machine, his gaze glued to something she couldn't see but guessed to be one of the open maintenance panels. She had dismantled them all over the devices in her attempt to find the malfunction.

"Yes, sir?" she answered routinely and for once he didn't comment on her slip.

"Ah… something started flashing here," he reported instead.

Instantly Sam was alerted. Roughly grabbing her laptop, she rushed over to where he stood. He was right, she realized the moment she halted next to him. Within the energy producing device the crystals had started lighting up and dimming in certain regular time intervals. Stunned, Sam watched the show for a moment. It was like looking at Christmas tree lights. Wordlessly Sam began to track the changes on her laptop. She was reading faint increases in the energy flow. Where the device had lain dormant earlier, it was now responding to something; activated but not really working yet, as if it was waiting for the order to start.

"Sir, what did you do?" she inquired.

He held up his hands in defense. "Nothing, Carter! I was just walking by! I swear!"

Sam gnawed on her lip in thought. Could it be? Had he activated the device by simply walking past it? Sam felt stupid all of a sudden. It kinda made sense. Everything within this base needed the Ancient gene to start up, so why not those devices as well? Sam had just assumed he had gotten them running from the control room when he had tried to activate the energy supply but what if the warning they'd received then hadn't been because of a malfunction but because of another safety program he would have needed to deactivate? Some kind of security check he had to pass or a safety measure he had to disable in order for the devices to reactivate and pick up their original jobs? It actually made sense. It would ensure that in case of an overthrow or invasion, nobody could get these controlling devices running aside from the intended personnel, as perfectly seen by Sam's own thwarted attempts. This was probably also the reason the Ancients hadn't bothered to destroy their base when they had abandoned it; nobody but them could use it anyways.

Again, Sam shot the Colonel a curious gaze. If she had been in charge of the base, she would have put the energy supply, the essential life supporting system of the base, under the highest security measures, meaning she would have severely restricted access, only allowing those of the highest ranks entrance. So how come the Colonel could just access anything and everything here after hundreds of years without any problem?

"So, what's it doin', Carter?" the Colonel asked into her considerations.

"It activated," she explained. "I'm guessing it is on stand-by."

The Colonel sighed relieved. "Does this mean we have energy?"

"No," she replied. "It would need some kind of activation order for that."

"Okay… so do I just think of activating it?" he inquired, hesitantly reaching out a hand towards the device.

Sam shrugged unknowing. Not having that much experience with Ancient technology activation by thought, she had no idea what she should tell him. "Try it," she finally advised.

He looked at her skeptically. "Do you think this is a good idea?"

"Sir, I have thoroughly checked all the devices, machines and backup systems. Everything is functioning perfectly. If you get it running then nothing bad can happen to us."

"Fine," he said, even though he still sounded a bit insecure. Nevertheless he concentrated and tried it. Sam observed the crystals raptly. For a moment they all lit up brightly and the readings on her laptop almost exploded from the raw energy surging through the systems but then everything fell inactive again, all crystals powering down.

"Oh, for cryin' out loud!" the Colonel cursed angrily.

Sam gnawed on her lip in deep thought, her thoughts racing. What had just happened? The device had activated due to the Colonel's presence but it had refused his order to start up? Was it here that his ability to access the systems ended? Or had he simply not used the right command? But if that was the case, then how were they supposed to know the right command?

Sam put her laptop away and carefully began to examine the device once more. The moment she stuck her hands into the maintenance panel and touched a few of the crystals however, something like an electric current shot through her body. Sam jerked instinctively in surprise but quickly realized she wasn't harmed.

"Sam!" the Colonel called out surprised but she failed to react to him, she was too taken by what was happening to her. Amazed beyond words the astrophysicist realized that she was kind of… feeling the inner workings of the device! Sam had no idea how this was even possible but she suspected it had something to do with her psychic abilities that granted her access to the systems by somehow connecting her with the advanced alien technology. However it was working though, it allowed Sam to feel some kind of barrier, a barricade that hindered them from getting the systems up and running. The barrier almost felt physically real. Sam's hands grabbed at air where she suspected the energy barrier to be but a strange mental echo of the barrier made her feel it. It wasn't like a force-field that you could physically touch, more like a firewall, invisible to the eye but still there. Sam placed her hands back in against the crystals in an effort to strengthen her connection with the barrier she felt and then tried pushing against it with her mind, but either it was her inexperience with her powers or her lack of the Ancient gene but the barrier wasn't budging.

"Sir!" she said, excited that she had finally found what she deemed to be the fault she had been searching for for days. "There's some kind of barrier here we need to circumvent! Can you try and order it to deactivate?"

She felt him step closer. "Carter, there's no way I'm going to order this thing to do anything as long as you have your hands stuck in it," he grumbled.

She shook her head. "There's no other way," she countered. "I need the connection so I can feel if what we're doing is successful!"

He still sounded less than pleased when he asked: "There's really no other–?"

She interrupted him before he could finish the sentence. "No sir, there isn't!"

Sighing deeply, he came to stand right next to her and again he laid his hands against the device. Now Sam could feel the order he conveyed to the machine as a sudden spike of energy surging through the system and then she felt the barrier react to it. As if it was an access panel needing a certain code, it seemed to check Jack's command and then, as if he was off by a number or two, Jack's order was denied. Sam grumbled in frustration when the crystals fell inactive once again. It wasn't working like this. Either they were just not meant to access these devices or they were missing the needed code but either way they could try for months and would probably achieve nothing. Sam mulled it over for a moment. Maybe they could kind of work around or break through the security barrier to activate the machine? It was a decidedly makeshift way of handling things and Sam would have preferred any other way because she didn't want to accidentally break something important by circumventing the security measures but she felt they were running out of options. If they couldn't guess on the right, needed code then what was left for them than to try to blow up the whole security measure?

"Again, sir!" she all but ordered, quickly forming a plan in her head.

She didn't hear him answer anything but the tensing of his body told her he was readying himself for the task at hand. Again Sam felt his energy flow through the device and again the barrier reacted. The moment the barrier activated, Sam intervened. She tried to mirror the Colonel's move and send some energy of her own into the machine, intending to weaken or destroy the barrier so that his order would reach the anticipated destination.

To her immense surprise, Sam felt the barrier crumple immediately with almost no resistance and with an audible hum the device activated. All around Sam's hands, crystals were lighting up bright and energetically. Stunned, Sam watched the crystals do their work and by the rapidly increasing heat around her hands, Sam deduced the device was getting to its intended task without further delay. She should probably move but their sudden conquering of the machine had taken her by surprise enough for her to fail to react in time.

It was the Colonel who caught up with the happenings just in time. Roughly pulling her back, he brought them out of the device's range moments before Sam saw a sizzle of highly charged electricity erupt, letting sparks fly where only a fraction of a second before her hands had been. Still, the force of the eruption was enough to send them stumbling back from the machine, their legs tangling and then Sam felt them falling. The next thing Sam noticed was her head crashing into the Colonel's BDU jacket and absently she realized she needed to be thankful that he had forgone his tactical vest and his P90 this time, heeding her advice of how hindering they were when working on these alien devices, which made her way luckier than him, especially if the pained groan she could hear floating up from him was anything to go by.

They lay silently on the ground for a moment and Sam could hear one device after the other activate around them. Slight crackling sounds told her energy was racing through the crystals and the cables, and from each of the opened maintenance light flooded the rooms flashing in all imaginable colors, bathing them in a rainbow of colors.

Sam straightened up and then turned to look at the Colonel. "Sir, are you okay?" she asked worried.

He reached up and rubbed his temples, his eyes closed but his expression relaxed. "All fine, Carter," he said. "What the hell just happened?"

Sam felt a grin tuck at her lips. "I think the devices were built to activate only by the presence of two Ancients," she said. "They needed two somehow identical orders so they would start up. Probably a safety measure so the machines couldn't be started by anyone other than the Ancients themselves."

"Oh yes?" he replied. "So how come they're working now?"

"My psychic powers," Sam explained. "I don't have the Ancient gene but apparently I could copy your order similarly enough to fool the machine."

He nodded, still keeping his eyes closed. "Does this mean you can feel… all this as well?"

She looked at him, puzzled. "Feel what, sir?"

He motioned around blindly with one of his hands. "All this power…" he explained slowly. "Almost everything within the base is getting powered up. I can feel the energy flow everywhere!"

Sam tried to understand but she couldn't. Whatever it was he was feeling was beyond her as she didn't have the Ancient gene to experience it in the way he did.

"No sir, I don't feel it," she answered. "After all just because I managed to fool a machine, I haven't turned Ancient."

He sighed. "Too bad."

Then he opened his eyes and looked directly at her. Abruptly he sat up and all of a sudden Sam was face-to-face with him. He grinned at her excitedly. "The whole base is running and buzzing with energy," he told her. "It feels incredible."

Sam grinned back automatically. "That's good," she decided. "Guess that means we'll be staying here?"

"Sure will, Carter," he agreed. Then he reached out unexpectedly and grabbed her chin, drawing her back to him for a quick kiss that Sam was in no way prepared for. Before she could react though he had already pulled back, leaving her sitting in front of him with her heart racing and her mouth gaping in surprise.

"Good work," he praised before adding almost affronted: "But seriously! Stop with the 'sir'!"

* * *

 _A/N: So, We've finally gotten the issue of the energy out of the way. Again, getting creative here with the crystal coloring. I suspect the colors do have a certain meaning but I'm not familiar enough with the Ancient technology to tell which one. Let's just assume it works in that way for this base…_


	37. Missing

_**Author's note**_ _: Again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Seven – Missing_

Daniel had barely reached his office when he heard the phone ring. Swiping his keycard through the door's operating panel, he hurried in from the hallway. He dropped the files he balanced in his arms on his overflowing desk and then grabbed the phone's handle.

"Doctor Jackson," he announced himself while carefully putting down his coffee mug, all the while trying to not spill something on the important documents littering his desk.

"Doctor Jackson! _Finally!_ I–" a voice began ranting from the other end of the line.

Daniel didn't even wait for the man to get started. The moment he recognized the voice of the lovely Senator Kinsey, he hung up. By now the man was calling him about once a day trying to get information from him but Daniel was in no mood anymore to try and be diplomatic with the politician. Slightly irritated Daniel wished for the first time in his life that he was military as well because then he could hide behind standing orders as all others were doing. Kinsey had only bothered the Colonels Reynolds and Dixon a few times, but upon understanding that neither Colonel would act against General Hammond's orders to not give anything away about the search for Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter to anyone not in need-to-know, the Senator had given up on them, resulting to pestering Daniel instead. Daniel knew that the NID was still investigating the incident because Jack and Sam deserting was putting the SGC and consequently Earth into a certain danger. The Pentagon had even ordered Dr. McKay back from Russia to rework all security systems Sam had installed to ensure neither she nor Jack could access the SGC from the outside ever again. And while the good Doctor McKay had boasted about how he would exactly be the right man for that job, Daniel could already see him struggle. He knew McKay was smart enough to get the job done eventually but it certainly wouldn't be as easy as he had thought it to be. Sam had done a thorough job and since she had practically built half of the SGC's systems on her own, it was a whole lot of work to redo it. Jack could be blocked from the systems rather easily in comparison, but getting Sam out of the loop when she was the one who had constructed and optimized all systems? Not that easy of a task.

Daniel shot a quick gaze at the calendar hanging on one of his office's walls. A pencil-drawn circle marked the day Sam and Jack had vanished from his life. With an empty gaze Daniel counted the days, as if this wouldn't be the first thing he did every morning.

21 days.

They had hit three weeks. Three weeks since his friends had deserted, fled to not be seen again. The days after their disappearance had been frantic to say the least. The Pentagon and the NID had almost fallen into a panic. _The_ two officers who knew the most about the Stargate Program and all operations connected to it and were in possession of unknown, uninvestigated but all the more strong powers had deserted. Of course they had felt endangered and tried to take all measures possible and necessary to prevent these officers from posing a threat to Earth, which essentially meant completely locking them out of all systems. And it wasn't only limited to Jack and Sam. To be on the safe side, all of SG-1's identification codes had gotten blocked from the systems, leaving Daniel and Teal'c chained to the base for days.

The NID with Agent Barrett in lead of all investigations had set up camp permanently within Cheyenne Mountain, doing their best to annoy the hell out of General Hammond with their rather fruitless investigations. No one, literally no one of the SGC, had an idea where Jack and Sam could have gone. Even Teal'c and Daniel were completely clueless. Nobody had even suspected the Colonel to do this rather rash move. Jack and Sam were known for being almost overly dutiful and trustworthy officers, so to almost all personnel it came as a shock to learn that they had disappeared. Only those who really knew what they had gone through could sympathize.

Still nobody knew anything, even if the NID didn't seem inclined to believe that. Instead they had pestered Daniel for days and days on end. They had pretty much given up on Teal'c when it became apparent that the Jaffa wouldn't talk so they had tried their luck with Daniel instead. In fact it had gotten so annoying Teal'c had taken to accompany Daniel almost everywhere as a living shield to the NID agents.

The NID had also tried to get Daniel and Teal'c off the roster of personnel going off-world, arguing that they could try and help their former teammates but General Hammond had overruled every single one of these attempts. Daniel and Teal'c were all he had left of his flagship team and their unrivaled experience was irreplaceable. Daniel knew that it had been a few days of heated arguments with quite a few meetings and discussions ending in screaming matches between NID agents and a few SGC Colonels and Majors. Daniel and Teal'c were denied the possibility to attend these meetings because they weren't military, but whenever one of the meetings ended Daniel found Sergeant Harriman needing him for some urgent task and always, unfailingly, the Sergeant who served as a recorder to these meetings would _coincidentally_ let a few details slip, updating Daniel on all events.

Initially the NID had tried to get Daniel and Teal'c transferred off the frontlines but so far General Hammond had downright refused and the Pentagon was with him. The fact that Daniel and Teal'c were non-military ensured that both could threaten with leaving the Stargate Program altogether should the NID get through with their demands. Neither Daniel nor Teal'c were inclined to work for the Air Force or even the US government should they get transferred away from the SGC. In fact Daniel was ready to chain himself to the base if necessary because there was simply no way for him to go. Not when there was still the possibility that one of the Search Teams the NID and the Pentagon still insisted on could accidentally stumble upon Jack and Sam somewhere.

Finally Colonel Reynolds had taken matters concerning Daniel and Teal'c into his hands and had assigned the remaining half of SG-1 to his own team, SG-3. With the emergency situation the SGC found itself in right now, the Colonel, who was 2IC to the base now with Jack gone, couldn't really leave the base and thus had given command over SG-3 temporarily over to Major Castleman. Still, seeing Daniel's and Teal'c's state of uncertainty and knowing of their invaluable knowledge firsthand made Reynolds reassign both men to his team; a brilliant strategic decision that also had the advantage that Reynolds could get them off-world whenever the situation turned dire to give General Hammond the needed time to work through the situation. And Daniel was thankful for that. He had not given up on his mission to free Sam and Jack of all the accusations tarnishing their reputation. The archaeologist was still determined to clear the way for them so that they could someday return to Earth and the SGC.

But to be able to do that, Daniel needed to wait for the right time. He had to wait until all tempers had cooled down noticeably and anyone would be willing to listen to him in the first place. But if anything, then Daniel was patient. He would wait for the right opportunity however long that would take. He just had to assure he wasn't losing his connection to the Stargate Program and all those responsible for it.

Astonishingly, quite a few people within the SGC seemed willing to help Daniel and Teal'c. They found themselves confronted with quite a bit of openly or secretly shown sympathy after Jack's and Sam's disappearance. Whether it was the kitchen personnel giving the pieces of cake or Jell-O usually reserved for Jack and Sam to Daniel's or Teal'c's share or Harriman updating them on all progress; whether it was Major Ferretti, Colonel Barnes of SG-6 or Major Harper of SG-5 who were in charge of the ongoing search for the deserted officers reporting to Daniel and Teal'c what they had found – or rather not found – or whether it were the SGC's scientists who were working almost suspiciously slow on anything the NID found pressing out of loyalty to their former team leader, Major Carter. Also nobody seemed to have much to say to all the questions the NID was posing and apparently nobody had noticed anything amiss about the officers at all. At first Daniel had been surprised but he quickly realized that he and Teal'c weren't the only ones to miss their friends. Sam had many friends and admirers throughout the whole base, having stable connections to most military personnel as well as the scientists, and Jack had been the much-respected 2IC of the base. Quite a few people here were hoping, just as much as Daniel himself, that sometime they would return and take over their rightful places again. Which was also why once again the SGC simply refused to rebuild SG-1. No officer however much decorated or experienced was willing to take on the SG-1 badge and so General Hammond had no other choice but to disband SG-1 for the time being. Maybe he would get back to create a whole new team but right now the Major General had really more pressing problems. The SGC was honestly struggling to get back to everyday life. With Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill gone, they had lost two of their most experienced frontline fighters and this was seriously endangering the SGC's operations. Apart from the fact that Jacob Carter had almost gone berserk upon learning that the SGC had 'lost' his daughter, the Tok'ra were seriously considering breaking off their alliance with Earth, fearing the repercussions the disappearance of Jack and Sam could have on them. After the pretty much devastating reaction from the usually peaceful and rational race, the Pentagon had installed standing orders to not inform the Asgard of anything concerning Jack's and Sam's disappearance. It was well known that only Jack's good connections to Thor and the fact that Sam had helped the Asgard out of tight spots a few times was what ensured Earth's ongoing alliance with the highly developed race. Apparently the Pentagon feared the Asgard would break off all connections with them should they learn of the two officers' vanishing – and inwardly, Daniel believed them to be right on this one.

Again, Daniel's phone rang and again, the archaeologist ignored it, knowing fully well that it was just Kinsey again, trying to needle any information out of him. SG-5 had just returned from another search mission, once more unsuccessfully, and Kinsey probably wanted to get updated as fast as possible, unable to wait for the official reports. Daniel really had no idea what Jack had actually done to get under the other man's skin that much but the good Senator, normally known to be the first one to hold high the unreasonably high costs such search missions would cause, was now the one pressing the recapture of the two officers gone AWOL the most.

Still, Daniel thought it to be a mission determined to fail. If Jack didn't want to be found then no one within the SGC would find him. Off-world the ex-black ops Colonel had almost unlimited possibilities and Daniel was pretty sure that even if one of the search teams would accidentally stumble upon the right planet, Jack could still escape right under their noses without them ever knowing. The only one who would have any chance at finding Jack would probably be Teal'c but even the NID was smart enough to not even ask the Jaffa, knowing beforehand where the warrior's loyalty lay.

So in Daniel's opinion Jack was lost to the SGC for the time being. And he would stay so as long as the Colonel deemed it necessary, which could as well be forever. And surely Sam would be with him. Daniel couldn't imagine them having split up, even if that was a possibility the NID was considering. Anyone who knew the Colonel and the Major would bet anything that they would stay together. Which also did a great deal in reassuring Daniel that they were fine. There was no better team than Jack and Sam. Together they got out of every tight spot so Daniel was sure they were doing fine.

But as much as he was aware they were fine and this had been the only possibility his friends had seen to ensure their freedom, Daniel missed them like crazy. The SGC was just not the same without the other half of his team. Going off-world with SG-3 was the best compromise he could have hoped for but it was still far from going on missions with Sam and Jack. Teal'c guarded Daniel like a shadow, overly protective of him now that Jack and Sam were gone, but still Daniel missed the way it had been before this whole mess. There was simply nothing like annoying Jack O'Neill with his technobabble or having lunch with the Colonel, teasing him over his well-known preference of cake as Jack would comment on Daniel's fondness of waffles. And there was simply nothing like talking shop with Sam. Nobody understood him as well as the Major did and Daniel missed the closeness between them. Sam was like a sister to him. And Jack had actually been something of a brother. In fact SG-1 was a so close-knit unit they were more like a family; a family that had now been ripped apart.

Daniel shot another glance at the calendar on his wall. How much longer, he mused silently. How much longer would he have to go on like this? A week? A month? A year? Ten years? Would Jack and Sam even return at all? How would they even know they could return if they had no possibility of contacting them at all? Even if Daniel succeeded in getting the brass to allow them access to Earth ever again they wouldn't even know, would they?

Again, the unwelcome thought crossed Daniel's mind that maybe Jack and Sam had fled with the certain conviction that they would never return.

Something within the archaeologist constricted painfully and the irrational urge to throw something across the room tugged at him. Was this how it was supposed to end? Jack and Sam gone and he and Teal'c left back? That just felt so wrong! Daniel didn't want to never see his friends again! He'd rather quit the SGC and go to wherever they were! Daniel had no fondness whatsoever of the Air Force to begin with, so his willingness to leave Abydos and work at the SGC had foremost been because of Sha're's loss and Jack's presence. When Sha're had died by Teal'c's hands Daniel had been about to quit and then it had been Jack bringing him back. The connection to the older man he considered his best friend, as well as his grown love for Sam, his sister in heart, and lastly, the good friend he had in Teal'c had been the things that had made Daniel continue at the SGC, even though he often had to struggle with the military ways. With Jack and Sam gone? There wasn't much that was keeping Daniel. So why not go off-world with Teal'c, search Jack and Sam and stay with them? They could continue their journeys off-world without the SGC as well…

The thought was actually intriguing but Daniel wasn't ready to give up yet. Maybe he could still change the situation on Earth and allow Jack and Sam to come back. After all they also had family and friends here to whom they certainly would want to return if they had the possibility. So Daniel was prepared to fight it out and if he failed then he could still consider how he wanted to continue. Until then it wouldn't hurt to see how the search teams would fare. Maybe they could rule out a few planets for Daniel because the archaeologist had as much knowledge about Jack's and Sam's whereabouts as all others present at the SGC: none.

Determined, Daniel turned, intending to return to the control room to have a little chat with Major Harper about their latest search. He wouldn't just give up. He was just getting started, after all.

* * *

 _A/N: I know it's a rather short chapter but I'm working out a few rough edges of the next chapters, which will all be Sam-Jack-centered and important so I want them to be good. Also I wanted to show what's happening to the SGC and SG-1 after Jack's and Sam's disappearance._


	38. Crashing together

_**Author's notes**_ _: And again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Eight – Crashing together_

Sam stared sullenly at the open gate of the hangar. Jack had just taken one of the small Ancient gliders she had gotten operational for a flight. All the spaceships left back at the base had been damaged in some way or another and when Sam had finally worked her way through the base getting all necessary life supporting systems operative, she had started working on the spaceships. The Colonel had constantly been by her side. At first because from their experiences with the energy controlling devices she had learned that she would need his skills and then because he wanted to be in her company. Even when she had been working on something, he would stay in one corner and occupy himself somehow, careful to not distract or bother her.

Together they had gotten the water-cleaning systems online, which provided them with drinking water as well as finally allowed them the possibility to take showers and wash their clothes. After the energy controlling devices, these systems had turned out the most complicated, so when Sam had finally succeeded in getting them running, the Colonel had switched on all showers in the large shower room by thought, making it seem as if it was raining in the large room because the water came directly out of the stone ceiling and then had dragged her under it, fully clothed. Like little kids they had relished in their achievement, skipping around the room from shower head to shower head, laughing freely and relieved, and drinking the clean water with their heads tilted back, knowing that they at least weren't in danger to die of thirst anymore. They had spent way too much time under the showers, only stopping when they had realized they had gotten thoroughly soaked and Sam had begun sneezing. Seeing that by then they didn't have any fresh clothes anymore and their last BDUs were dripping wet, they had spent a very uncomfortable night naked, wrapped up in only their blankets, trying their best to not touch the other when they were getting more and more comfortable with the new closeness between them. They had never moved their beddings away from lying directly next to the other's and by now they fell asleep in each other's arms almost every night. Sam got more and more accustomed to calling him by his first name and he had started to call her 'Sam' instead of 'Carter'.

They also weren't hesitating in touching the other anymore but they still very much stayed on safe grounds. So while it wasn't uncommon anymore for Jack to brush her fingers with his, stroke his fingers over her cheek or even lay an arm around her shoulders, this was as far as he seemed willing to go. More and more Sam found herself wishing he would go further and touch her more intimately but apparently he had no intention of doing that. And Sam had no idea if that was because he didn't want it or she was just too fast, ploughing on with a pace he wasn't comfortable with. He had kissed her a few times but while those were all sweet kisses leaving her body tingling with anticipation, a silly, excited smile crossing her features, and her floating somewhere above the ground, it was universes apart from the steamy kiss they had shared in Sam's quarters when she had been in confinement.

Still, aside from her wishful thinking Jack obviously wasn't sharing, they were slowly working things out between them and before Sam had realized it, they had settled into a new, comfortable routine with each other. As she had always expected, they were good with each other. They were sharing tasks almost with no problems, being used to it due to the uncountable missions they had accomplished together. Whenever Sam was working on some necessary supply system and wasn't in need of him, Jack would do whatever else was needed to be done. With all energy systems running, Jack had gotten the defense systems online which at first had almost scared Sam to death when the systems had picked up on her foreign, non-Ancient presence and had almost shot her down. Only Jack's fast reactions had prevented that from happening and since then he had worked on getting the systems to ignore Sam but still reacting to any other human coming to their planet.

They were a good team and shared all tasks, with Sam doing their laundry while Jack would cook. Sam hadn't found a washing room yet so she made do with the shower room and wary of the foreign furniture Jack had stumbled upon during his exploration trips, the Colonel preferred to stick to their camping cooker until they ran out of gas and had to resort to building small fires, all the while having to convince the security systems of the base that it wasn't burning when after the first time of them attempting to cook their food like that what had felt like tons of water had come pattering down on them from the ceiling in a matter of seconds, drenching everything from their tent to their whole equipment which had taken them days to dry out again and had made for quite a few very uncomfortable nights.

But apart from a few mishaps, they had made this base as much their home as possible and neither of them wanted to leave. The base was providing as much shelter as protection and with Jack's ability to control all systems, they were as comfortable as they could probably get off-world. The only really pressing matter they were encountering was food. Slowly but surely they had run out of their supplies and for two days now they hadn't eaten a thing. They had more than enough water but nothing to eat. Jack had begun to scout the perimeters outside the base, hoping to hunt something down but until now unsuccessful. He hadn't stumbled upon any wildlife and even though he had found a few berries and seemingly edible roots, they hadn't had the courage to try them, not knowing if they could be poisonous. Neither of them wanted to test how Jack's healing powers would fare against poisoning.

So they had sat down and tried to find a solution to their problem. Without any food, they couldn't stay at the base, no matter how comfortable they'd gotten. But neither of them wanted to leave, so they had stopped working on any other system and Sam had set on getting one of the spaceships operational so that they could scout the planet and see if there was a source of food anywhere. Sam had chosen to begin with the smallest glider that was still mostly intact. It had only taken her a day to get it running and now Jack was out with it doing a test flight. The technology was still much unknown to them and despite her grumbling and pleading, the Colonel had made her stay back. With his Ancient gene, he was the only one able to fly the spaceships and apparently he wasn't too confident in their fast progress and opted to only put himself in danger. Sam hated the thought with vigor. If anything happened, he wouldn't be able to do anything. After all even if he knew what was to be done, he couldn't repair _and_ fly the spaceship at the same time!

But whatever she had said, he hadn't swayed in his decision. Stubborn, overprotective fool.

Thus Sam now sat at the opened gate of the hangar, her eyes scanning the sky restlessly for the small silhouette of the glider, hoping that he hadn't activated the cloak for invisibility. If he would even think of making this flight any longer than strictly necessary, he would get it from her!

Her stomach rumbled faintly, protesting that it wasn't getting fed, but it was getting rarer. At first Sam had had trouble getting accustomed to the lack of food and the surplus of water they were drinking to compensate the lack of nourishment but slowly her stomach was surrendering or was simply lacking the strength to still put up a fight.

Sam looked up at the slowly darkening sky to distract herself from her hunger and her worrying thoughts. It had been some time since she had seen the actual sky, even though there were a few spots within the base where they could climb to the surface. In a few places the aboveground structures were intact enough for them to ascend to them. They had ventured outside before, soaking up actual sunlight even if the artificial light in the base was a very close replacement, and a few times they had come up during the nights to stargaze. The stars here were amazing and slowly Sam had begun to recognize them. She and the Colonel had named a few constellations they had found and Sam had given him her journal to draw pictures of them in it. Sometime during her work on the energy controlling devices Sam had started taking notes on their findings and the knowledge she gained of the Ancient technology, not knowing if they were ever going to need it again, and had scribbled down everything she thought important in a small journal she kept with her things to make exactly such notes. Slowly, the small book began to overflow but thankfully they had worked their way through almost all necessary systems and Sam estimated she wouldn't have much to take down in the book anymore.

Sam raked her eyes over the dozen of abandoned spaceships in the deadly silent hangar. They were all damaged in some way, which was why they had been left here when the Ancients had abandoned the base, but Sam intended to repair them all, one after the other, if she could. They could still come in handy.

It would take a lot of time, she figured, but if anything, they had time. Sam counted in her head and realized that almost six weeks had passed since they had deserted. It actually wasn't that long a period of time and with all that had happened, Sam had thought more time would have passed already. Luckily for them the planet they were hiding on was pretty similar to Earth, the days only two hours longer, which made it easy to count the days passing on Earth and let them adjust almost effortlessly.

It had been Jack to research these details when they had noticed that their watches didn't match up with the rhythm of days and nights anymore, because Sam had simply been too busy. When he thought Sam didn't need him and there was nothing more pressing to do, he would wander to the control room and mess with the controls in the hopes to stumble upon useful information. Sometimes he even did. Like that they had learned that the control room's devices held a large database they had yet to go through and that the planet they were now living on, as well as the base it hosted, were called 'Laterra', meaning 'shelter', 'refuge' or 'protection' – the Colonel hadn't been exactly sure how to translate it, but Sam thought all of them adequate descriptions and worthy names for such a base. They still had their problems with the Ancient language because although the Colonel did instinctively understand the meaning, the actual words eluded them, but Sam meant to work on that when she would finally have the time, even though she sincerely doubted they would get anywhere near the level of understanding Daniel had of the Ancient language.

Again Sam felt the urge to sigh upon imagining how Daniel would have loved all this here. The archaeologist would have probably gotten a heart attack from excitement if he would have had the chance to explore these structures. Ironically it now were Jack and Sam combing through them and analyzing the language.

Daniel…

The thought of him stung. Sam missed her friends with a fierceness that tended to surprise her from time to time. Over and over again she had fantasized about talking to Daniel about her discoveries whenever she had lost the Colonel with her explanations. She knew Jack was trying his best but he just was no scientist at heart and his patience had limits. Sam would have loved to examine these structures down to the last rock with Daniel but unfortunately she had had to leave her friend back at the SGC. From what Sam had read between the lines, the Colonel had been hesitant enough to even take her along, so he hadn't even thought of getting Daniel and Teal'c on board. Getting him and Sam on Earth's black list had apparently seemed enough damage done to him.

Still, when Sam nowadays thought of her friends, imagining Daniel's wide, excited smile and Teal'c's calm, confident posture, she felt tears well up in her eyes. The thought of never seeing them again was hurting and she knew it would take quite some time to come to terms with that.

A humming sound ripped her from her drifting thoughts and Sam straightened up, getting to her feet when she saw the small glider de-cloak, returning into the visible spectrum, and then carefully maneuver into the hangar. Jack was back.

Sam brushed over her cheeks self-consciously, erasing any traces of any tears that might or might not be there. She waited for him to power down the glider and then open the door at the ship's rear. He stepped out and Sam immediately studied his expression. He seemed torn, somewhat satisfied and disgruntled at the same time.

"Was there a problem?" Sam asked before he had any chance to say something.

He shook his head. "Nah, all systems running perfectly."

Sam was relieved.

"Still," he continued hesitantly. "We have a problem."

Sam raised her brows astonished. "What kind of problem?"

He was gritting his teeth in frustration and running a hand through his messy hair when he explained: "I absolutely couldn't find anything edible. The scanners didn't pick up on any lifeforms apart from a whole lot of insects crawling on the ground."

Sam could feel her face fall. Those really were bad news. It meant there was no wildlife they could hunt for food or fish they could catch. But they would need food. Sooner rather than later. If worst came to worst Sam thought they could eat a few of the insects and try their luck with the plants but she really rather avoid either scenario. It would still be insufficient nourishment for two grown adults anyways.

"Then, what are we going to do…?" she asked tentatively. "Do we have to leave Laterra?"

He looked at her calculatingly and immediately Sam knew he was going to say something she wouldn't like and steeled herself. "Actually," he began. "I was more thinking of using the Stargate. We could gate to other planets and get food there."

This… didn't sound so bad, Sam thought. "You mean hunting somewhere where there's actually wildlife?" she asked.

He shrugged. "We could also trade. Or steal, if necessary."

Sam didn't really like the thought of that but she quickly realized that they were in no position to be picky. Moral and ethical standards were good and all, but food was critical and their situation was turning dire enough so that they couldn't really afford the luxury of holding up all their moral principles if they wanted to survive.

"Okay," she agreed.

He nodded. "I have tried and I can access the control room's systems from the glider. I can make the Stargate dial from the glider, so I could take the glider with me for speed and protection."

Again Sam wondered if that was normal that he could access the control room from such a small glider when the Ancients had done such a thorough job of defending their base and sealing off the control room, but she pushed the thought aside when another detail filtered through to her.

" _You_?" she asked pointedly.

"Yes," he answered calmly.

"Not _we_?" Sam pushed suspiciously.

Jack sighed, looking almost apologetic. "I intend to go alone."

Sam gaped at him speechless. He was… _what?!_ He was going alone? Why? And, more important, had he just made the decision on his own without even asking her first? Why wasn't she asked for her opinion first?

"Why?" she wanted to know, trying for patience. "The glider may be small, but it's still big enough for the two of us."

"Sam, it's no use to discuss that. I'll go alone."

Her eyebrows shot up to her hair line in surprise. Oh? So he wasn't going to discuss it? He was just going to leave her back like that? Anger began swelling within her, rushing through her body with speed and force, leaving her silently fuming with him. Fine! If he wanted to have it his way, she certainly wouldn't make a scene, would she?

Sam turned on her heels and without saying a word or even glancing back, she left the hangar, practically storming away. Behind her, she could hear him curse softly, but she didn't react to it. Just when she had thought they were moving on from everything, establishing an equal relationship between them – or really any relationship at all – he was returning to ordering her around! The man had some nerve!

Blindly, Sam stomped through the hallways, the surroundings blurring around her with the speed she used to get away.

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Sam was angry. Angry beyond words to be exact and that kept her from getting sleepy despite the late hour. After she had burned off all excessive energy by storming through the base's corridors aimlessly, she finally made her way back to their living quarters. Jack waited for her there, knowing unfailingly that she would return to their quarter when she was ready. Except that she wasn't ready to face him yet. So Sam refused to even look his way and not even acknowledging him with a word, she retreated to their tent. He called something after her she didn't react to. She merely closed the tent's flap behind her with enough force to send him a message and then flung herself onto her bedding to curl up in her sleeping bag with every intention to _attempt_ to sleep.

How dare he simply decide over her head! And worse, why had he even decided it like that? They had gone on missions uncountable times before, so what was different now? Had the time they had recently spent together somehow changed his opinion of her? Now that he had gotten a closer view on the woman Samantha Carter, had he forgotten what the soldier Major Carter was capable of? Did he think her weak now? Had she shown weakness in front of him that was influencing his opinion of her capability?

Sam hadn't ever thought that to happen, but apparently she'd been wrong, hadn't she? She had never imagined the Colonel to mix up his personal and professional opinion of her, but that was what had happened, wasn't it?

The tent's flap opened and Sam could hear Jack crawl in. Instantly she closed her eyes and pretended to sleep. She had not the slightest desire to fight this out with him now!

He leaned over her and she was careful to not react to it.

He huffed at her antics. "Carter, I know you're awake," he busted her pretense.

"I'm _trying_ to sleep here," she brushed him off brusquely.

He sat down next to her and tentatively reached out, resting his hand on her shoulder. She tensed under his touch and sighing, he withdrew his hand.

"C'mon, can't we at least talk about it?" he offered. Sam knew what that offer cost him, still she was too mad to let it sway her in her anger.

"You made it quite clear that there was nothing to discuss," she shot back. She was so not going to make this easy for him!

"You know how I meant that, Carter…" he said.

"Oh, do I?" she asked.

For a moment, there was silence and Sam found herself urged to sit up. Exasperated that she was again giving in to him when all she wanted was to ignore him, she threw her sleeping bag aside and sat up, turning to face him.

"From my perspective, _sir_ ," she began emphasized. "It's sounding as if you're ordering me to stand down from a mission I have _every_ right to go on as well!"

He squinted his eyes, displeased at her return to the military address she hadn't used with him in days. "I'm doing no such thing," he said. "I would just rather have you stay back."

"Why?" she inquired hurt. So he really didn't want her to go with him. "I can't believe I actually have to remind you of that, but I _am_ military. I know what's at stake and what I have to do, just like you! We've been on missions before. _How is this any different?_ "

He snorted. "Carter, I _know_ all that! Fully well, to be exact. Heck, you've saved my six on a few missions, so there's no way I'm doubting your abilities here! But you can't compare this here to any mission we've done on the SGC!"

"Why not?" she inquired. She didn't really see a difference.

"For once, there will be no backup to come if we get into a dangerous situation and with our own men after us, the odds have increased exponentially that we will run into danger on other planets," he explained. "I have been trained to do solo missions and alone I will be faster and more inconspicuous. Also our ammo will last longer if I go alone."

All valid reasons but Sam wasn't about to accept even one of them.

"So you want me to stay back and wait here, not knowing if you might be captured when you will fail to return some day? _No way!_ Sir, I will be your backup! I will guard your six!"

He gritted his teeth, even though Sam could read in his eyes that he had been prepared for her resistance. "I didn't really expect you to stand down," he admitted grimly. "But I still rather have you stay here."

"What about 'in this together'?" she threw his own words at him when she felt him sway.

He sighed deeply. "No chance of you backing down?" he tried a last time. Sam was vaguely aware and thankful that he wasn't trying to order her to stay back. Given her anger she would have still fought his decision but it made her feel so much more equal that he was trying to persuade her rather than to just make it an order she would feel compelled to comply with.

"No fucking way in hell!" she said nonetheless, getting him to raise an eyebrow at her because of her language.

"God, Carter!" he groaned. "Do you have any idea of the danger we're actually in? We will have to be very stealthy and capture is not a question of 'if', but of 'when'!"

"I know, sir," she said. "Which is why I can't let you go on your own."

She would rather end up captured by his side, again, than stay back and perhaps never see him again if he would be caught on some other planet. Somewhere in the back of her mind, she realized he was doing this to protect her, to keep her safe and to spare her the experience of yet another capture, but she was more than willing to concede to the risk if it only meant she could go with him. She couldn't stand being separated from him when he was all she had left.

His dark eyes narrowed on her, his intense gaze indicating that he was ticked off. "Carter, will you _finally_ stop with the 'sir'!" he snapped at her irritated.

"I will go with 'sir' whenever you treat me as military," she denied him.

Frustrated with her, he raked his hand through his hair roughly, getting it to stick up in all directions. Just like hers, it was getting longer with the time passing, not really resembling his military cut any longer.

"You know that, sometimes, you can be a real pain in the ass?" he growled.

Well, she could give that right back, she thought, but military training ensured she kept her tongue in check while in the presence of her former CO. She hadn't outgrown her old habits enough to insult her CO yet. Still, she knew he could probably read it in her expression anyway, going by the way his eyes darkened angrily.

"I'm trying to keep you safe here, Carter," he grumbled irately.

Oh? What did he think of her?! She was no damsel in distress he needed to guard! She knew he probably meant no harm with that, but still she couldn't help but be offended by that.

"Well, I don't need you to do that!" she stated crossly.

He sighed and when he looked at her again, the dark energy possessing him just a moment ago seemed to have retreated a little. "I know," he acknowledged, before continuing in a serious tone she had seldom heard him use: "But I can't help it. It's just the way I am that I want to protect what's precious to me!"

Sam forgot to breathe, her breath getting stuck somewhere in her throat. She was… precious to him? Really? He had known he would lose this argument anyways and had no means of making her stay back, but still he had tried, risking a fight with her because he couldn't stand the thought of endangering her?

Sam was aware that he was right that the danger they were in had doubled at best with their own men after them now. Sam was also aware he was assessing their situation pretty accurate and knowing the Colonel as well as she did, she found it matched that he tried to protect her, even if he knew all too well that she wouldn't need his protection. But just like she couldn't stand the thought of him going into danger alone, fearing for him, he would be reluctant to drag her into it when he thought he could avoid it. Sam knew he would rather go and put himself into danger a thousand times over than to chance endangering her if he had a choice.

Still, Sam wouldn't budge with this one. Either she would go as well, or neither of them would go.

"Jack…" she whispered barely audible. "If you were to go alone, then how could _I_ protect what's precious to me?"

He looked at her astonished as if that thought was new to him. That was just so him to forget that she was much in the same situation he was in! Sam smiled almost automatically, feeling her anger leave her gradually. She _had_ told him before, hadn't she? When she had been possessed by Nirrti… So how come he still forgot that she was driven by much the same feelings as he was when it came to the other's safety and well-being?

"Sam…" he murmured back, sounding surprised. Was he remembering what she was as well?

Suddenly, he surged forwards, crossing what little distance was between them. Sam felt him roughly grab her around the neck, pulling her head in to him. His lips crashed against hers urgently. In spite of all the recent kisses they had shared, this one was not gentle in any way. It was rough, hard and passionate. He hovered over her, supporting his weight with his free arm that held him upright over her. He pushed against her with strength and Sam felt herself surrender to him almost immediately. He needed something from her, assurance, certainty and physical contact, and she was more than willing to give him what he was seeking. His mouth pushed hers open and as soon as she complied, opening up to him, Jack's tongue entered her mouth, roughly taking possession. Sam met his advance eagerly, actually sighing in pleasure when he took over completely, dominating their kiss. She wasn't giving up control often or willingly but with him she felt herself give in readily, enjoying the incredible feeling. Although he wasn't holding back, he tried to be careful with her and Sam felt safe and protected despite the rough handling and the strong grips.

Sam let herself sink back onto her sleeping bag and he was following her immediately, refusing to break their contact. His mouth kept exploring hers while Sam reached up, snaking her arms around his back. With an impatient tug she pulled him down fully on her and while his weight was positively crushing, she reveled in the feeling of his body so close to hers. Her hands were roaming over his back, feeling the distinct muscles through his BDUs. Their lips were moving nonstop with each other's, only breaking contact to draw in short breaths, before they would crash together once more. He was impatiently tugging at her bottom lip when she took a second too long, her chest heaving against his upper torso with the need to breathe, and when she moaned to the feeling of his teeth nibbling at her lower lip, he growled lowly, contently, in response.

Finally it was the passion Sam had missed between them. It was the intimacy of not only the affection between them but the lust and the undeniable, electrical attraction they shared. Sam clutched onto him, her fingers curling into his jacket, all the while wishing he would shed it. He shifted his weight, keeping himself upright on one forearm, while his now free hand grabbed onto her waist. Sam couldn't help the unintentional jerk she did at feeling his warm fingers on her body, even if it was through her BDU shirt. He began running them up her side, caressing her through her clothes and Sam began gasping for air. Her pulse sped up so much and she couldn't get enough oxygen into her body with their kisses, so soon the world around her started spinning. When his hand grazed the underside of her breast through her shirt, Sam actually threw back her head, an audible moan escaping her. He simply averted his attention to her neck, kissing his way from her jaw to her ear where he found her sensitive spot again with an astonishing accuracy. Sam tried to concentrate on her breathing, because she was in serious danger of hyperventilating. When the world finally wasn't rotating around her anymore, all her senses focused on the man above her and the feel of his body pressed to hers and his fingers exploring her body. Sam let one of her hands run up his back, stroking over his spine and then entangled it in his short hair while he worked on the side of her neck. She held onto him with all the strength she possessed and rubbed her cheek against the side of his head, wanting as much contact with him as possible. Her frantic, irregular breath washed down his neck and her heartbeat echoed in her ears. Heat began spreading through her body, leaving her squirming under him. Instinctively and without noticing, Sam parted her legs, making room for him where her body wanted him the most right now.

He stopped.

Abruptly, he broke off from her. Sam actually needed a second or two to notice.

He pushed back, bringing distance between them. Before Sam had understood what had happened, he had left her. He scrambled out of the tent, not even closing the flap behind him and was gone before she had even processed what was going on.

All riled up, hot and confused beyond words, Sam stared after him, trying to make out what she had done wrong now.

* * *

 _A/N: God, I swear I wanted this chapter to end very differently but no matter how I tried, it simply felt off and not true to Jack's and Sam's characters… Sometimes it's frustratingly hard to write them realistically._


	39. Flying

_**Author's notes**_ _: For those who were worried after the last chapter: no,_ this _won't be everything this story will be about from now on. I do feel however that it describes a certain part of Jack's and Sam's relationship that is bound to happen and if I leave it out, I wouldn't do their relationship and its development justice._

 _However, this chapter's going to be different. In fact, it's one of my favorite chapters in the story, so enjoy!_

 _Aside from that, thank you all once again for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Thirty-Nine – Flying_

Sam trudged after Jack carefully. Since they had nothing to trade yet – they themselves were living on the bare necessities – they had no other option than to steal food in order to survive. For their first raid they had chosen a planet known to them, thinking it to be the safer option than trying a new, unfamiliar planet. Neither of them wanted to stumble into Goa'uld territory by mistake since they had no MALP to send for recon first.

The planet they had chosen, P7Z-776, was known for its large market, meeting their needs quite well. Jack had taken them with the invisible glider as close to the market as he dared and then, really making Sam stay back, he had gone to get them cloaks to hide under since it wouldn't do them any good to be spotted in their BDUs. Antsy and nervous, Sam had stayed at the glider, counting the seconds ticking by. She had had a horrible night behind her and had been cranky to begin with, so his order for her to wait wasn't really lifting her mood. Yes, she had achieved to get him to take her with him, but that didn't mean he wouldn't make her wait somewhere else. They had mutually agreed that they needed their military hierarchy to get those food raids to work since they couldn't chance an argument when they were off-world and in possible danger, so they had returned to their CO-and-subordinate relationship.

Not that they were anything else to begin with, Sam thought dryly. If anything he had made it clear last night he wasn't willing to go any further with her. Because this was the only explanation Sam had been able to come up with why he had stopped suddenly. She certainly had been more than willing to finally explore the searing attraction between them and even thinking about how she had bared herself to him got her cheeks burning violently. And he had just left, leaving her to one of the most uncomfortable nights of her life. He hadn't returned to their tent the whole night. Sam knew. She had waited, only dozing through the night, but he hadn't come back. They had met back at the hangar sometime in the morning where he had been readying the ship, not even glancing her way. Stiffly, Sam had entered and silently, they had made their way through the Stargate when they had decided on a location with as few words as possible.

Upon arriving there, Jack had established how they were going to operate – with him in charge and her following his orders – and then had commanded her to wait while he procured clothes for them that would let them merge with the crowd. She had to give it to him that he hadn't taken long to return. He had two full-length, gray cloaks with hoods and a bag made out of cloth with him. Without really explaining his actions, he had draped the bag around Sam, leaving it hanging in front of her stomach and then had wrapped her up in the cloak. While he threw on his own, Sam had to admit that the long cloaks were hiding their frames quite well. On their way to the market, they halted and masked their expressions by smearing dirt into their faces and upon thinking for a moment, Jack also rubbed it into her bright hair where it stuck out from under the hood.

Now they were slowly making their way over the large market, stopping here and there as if they were sightseeing while the Colonel skillfully let anything they could need disappear into the bag she was carrying. By now Sam looked and felt rather pregnant with the bag growing heavier and heavier in front of her stomach and she understood that that was exactly what he had been going for. How to better hide their stealing?

Sam was nervous beyond words and was actually astonished that her racing heart hadn't given them away yet, but the Colonel appeared as calm as always. He even had the guts to do some small talk with a few merchants while he handed her a few of their goods out of their sight to stash it away in their quickly filling bag. Sam wondered why nobody seemed confused by the fact that she became more and more pregnant with every minute, but nobody paid them any attention at all. They were simply two strangers strolling around with dozens of other walkers.

That was until Sam accidentally bumped into someone. She turned to apologize when a familiar voice said distractedly: "Oh, sorry, my fault!"

Sam's heart almost stopped at hearing the familiar voice and she felt Jack tense up next to her. Already half-turned, Sam recognized the camouflage BDUs he was wearing, confirming that the voice indeed belonged to Daniel.

Sam went rigid, her brain drawing a blank at what she was to do. She took great care to avoid looking at her friend because one better look at her would be all he would need to recognize her, and then, with quick glances, Sam surveyed their surroundings. Behind Daniel stood Lieutenant Judson from SG-3 and not far away she could make out Majors Castleman and Warren, and Lieutenant Johnson, as well as Teal'c. Colonel Reynolds was nowhere to be seen, but this was enough as it was, she decided.

Sam felt Jack's hand close around her wrist under the cloak and tug at it gently, nudging her to go. Without saying anything to Daniel, because she was afraid he would recognize her voice, she turned, intending to follow Jack.

Another hand to her shoulder held her back however.

"Miss?" Daniel asked curiously. "Are you alright?"

Again Sam froze, trying to decide what would be the best thing to do. She didn't want to draw any unnecessary attention to them but she _needed_ to get rid of Daniel, fast. The moment the rest of SG-3 and Teal'c would pick up on them, it would be too late. Their first raid and they would get themselves captured! No way!

Jack was the one to take matters in his hand. With a swift movement, he put himself in front of Sam and also refusing to look directly at Daniel, he drew his army knife, careful to take his pocket knife and not the standard SGC combat knife that would give them away instantly, and pointed it at Daniel. Peeking over the Colonel's shoulder Sam saw an astonished expression take over Daniel's face before he cautiously stepped back. Behind him, Judson gripped his P90 tighter and Sam felt Jack reach for his Berretta at his thigh, too. They also had their P90's with them, but reaching for them would be a so obvious military move they would most likely give themselves away with it and so Jack refrained from it.

Sam touched her hand to the barrel of her Berretta too, but she didn't grip the weapon, still hoping the situation was playing out in their favor, but prepared to help the Colonel if the situation would tip over.

Judson chuckled, not really catching on to the severity of the situation. "Well, it seems alien men aren't taking it too kindly if you touch their wives," the Lieutenant laughed at Daniel.

"No, I thought…!" Daniel opposed, trying to get a closer look on them without stepping into the range of Jack's knife.

Daniel was close to recognizing them, Sam realized. He was suspecting something and if they would even give him one hint…

Having come to the same conclusion, Jack began to push her back.

"Wait!" Daniel urged when they retreated, making to follow them but luckily for them, Judson held him back.

"Let 'em go," he advised. "I'm not fond of getting into a fight just because you touched the wrong woman."

Jack ushered Sam around the next corner and together, they hid in the shadows just when Daniel protested: "But she looked just like Sam!"

Sam held her breath when Judson replied calmly: "You should get your eyes checked out, Doctor! The last time I have seen Major Carter she wasn't at least six months pregnant!"

Daniel apparently failed to come up with some answer to that and slowly, they heard their footsteps veer away.

Exhaling relieved Sam and Jack quickly made their way around the market, neither of them wanting to stay another second and chance running into their team again. As fast as possible they returned to their glider, only relaxing when the rear door closed behind them, the invisible glider hiding them from the outside world. Angered, Jack threw his cloak into a corner and then flopped down in the only pilot's seat. Sam slowly lowered her hood and untangled the bag from her. It was heavy with all the things they'd stolen, so she put it down in a corner.

Jack got the glider running and only seconds later they were on their way to the Stargate. Only a few feet away from the market they passed SG-3 and out of the front window, Sam threw a last glance at her friends. Daniel was speed-talking to Teal'c, obviously telling his friend his chance encounter while the stoic Jaffa listened attentively and SG-3's Lieutenants Judson and Johnson were laughing at the archaeologist. It felt like a knife cutting through a half-healed wound when they left their friends behind.

At the Stargate Jack had to stop. Hovering with the small glider in the air, he accessed the DHD from the glider's operating panel and immediately the chevrons began locking one after the other. The wormhole connected and without wasting a second, Jack started the glider for the event horizon. From this high above in the air Sam could see the shapes of SG-3 having stopped in the distance, watching the Stargate that – to them – had activated for no apparent reason.

A minute and a small detour later they had returned to Laterra and another minute later Jack had parked the glider in the hangar. Sighing, he rose and Sam watched him as he stepped around the pilot's seat before he suddenly stopped, looking at her with a surprised expression.

"Sam?" he asked concerned.

Confused, she tried to find out what was wrong until she realized there was a single tear rolling down her cheek. Meeting Daniel and seeing Teal'c had been too much. She had felt emotionally vulnerable even before they had headed out and this chance encounter had simply been too much.

Roughly, she scrubbed over her cheek.

"It's nothing!" she claimed.

She could see he didn't believe her a word immediately.

Gradually and deliberately he stepped up to her and opened his arms to her. "C'mere?" he offered, slightly hesitant due to the strained atmosphere between them.

Without hesitating Sam stepped into his embrace. Dry shudders were making her body tremble even though she wasn't crying. His arms closed around her and his head buried into her neck while she pressed herself against his chest.

"God, I miss them so much!" she admitted, whispering.

"I know," he answered.

"I wish we could go back!" she sniffled, only now realizing she really meant it. She didn't regret what they had done but nevertheless she wished they would have the possibility to return sometime.

"I know," he said once again.

Inhaling deeply, Sam tried to regain control over herself again. She was so sick of feeling sad, miserable and depressed. It didn't even change a damn thing, to begin with!

"Jack?" she asked shakily. He grumbled something akin to a response, telling her he was listening.

"I'm glad you're here with me," she confessed.

"I know," he replied and then she felt his lips lightly brush over her neck. It was the barest hint of a kiss, only meant to reassure her and show her he was here with her.

Together, they stood within the glider, holding onto each other and drawing strength from the other's presence.

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The next few days were depressing to say the least. Sam was working on the spaceships listlessly while Jack sat in the middle of the hangar, going through all planets' addresses they remembered to find out which planets they could visit for their next raids. Off-world there wasn't much preserved or canned food and so they could only take perishable food, which would leave them with the necessity to go on another raid every few days.

However, seeing Daniel and Teal'c again had made their previous ease disappear faster than cake in the Colonel's presence. Sam felt like a deflated balloon, walking and acting rather on autopilot than conscious will. She really missed her friends. And she missed being back on Earth. She missed her home, she missed the base, she missed working at the SGC, she missed going through the Stargate with her team and she missed being a US Major. Yes, she was thoroughly homesick. If it hadn't been for the Colonel's presence, she felt she would have already gone nuts. But as if he knew she was dancing on a fine line, he was constantly there for her. He wasn't intruding, instead leaving her be as much as she needed it, but he was always close by. Inconspicuously he kept a careful eye on her and for once, Sam didn't feel watched. Instead she drew strength from his reassuring presence.

"Sam?" his voice asked from behind her while she worked on one of the bigger glider's engine. Until now she had gotten three of the spaceships up and running.

"Hm?" she answered absentmindedly while putting a few crystals back into their intended places.

"How's it going?" he wanted to know.

She straightened up and cast a last glance over her work. "Just about done," she announced.

Jack stopped right next to her and she looked up at him. He was studying her expression.

"Then you wanna take this thing for a ride?" he suggested, motioning at the glider with his chin.

"Really?" she asked, unable to hide the excitement flooding her. The last gliders he had been test flying, getting careful with them when number two had had a small implosion on its first test flight. Luckily nothing had happened. He had been able to return to the base with it and Sam had fixed the problem with an all-nighter.

"Really," he insisted.

Sam nodded happily, her pilot's heart swelling with anticipation and eagerness.

Side by side they entered the glider. It was noticeably bigger than the one they used for their raids, but still small enough to fit through the Stargate. It had two pilot's seats and leaving the main pilot's seat to Jack, Sam sat down in the right one. Almost routinely, Jack sat down to her left and immediately all controls lit up due to his presence. With his thoughts only he willed belts to snap shut over their chests, strapping them to their seats and then got the glider operational. The engine was purring quietly and all controls in front of them were lit evenly. Confidently, Jack laid his hands down on the control panel. The glider rose into the air effortlessly and in front of them the hangar's gate opened, all controlled by Jack.

Sam immediately saw that night had fallen without her realizing. Jack dimmed the hangar's lights as to not give the base away to any chance observer they might not have noticed and then steered the glider out into the night air. Crisp air wafted around them in the glider from the oxygen supply systems.

All around them was darkness, all shapes blurring together. Only the stars above them lightened up the complete blackness. Sam looked up to them, tracing their shapes with her eyes, when suddenly, without saying anything, Jack propelled them up into space, leaving the planet's atmosphere, until Sam felt as if they were floating right underneath the stars. She knew this was merely an illusion because these stars were actually planets still millions of light-years away, but still she thoroughly enjoyed the sight. Here, up in the air, she felt at home, the feeling similar to the experiences she had made flying an F-16 or the X-302's. The only real difference was the speed. Right now they were going so slow Sam got the illusion she could reach out and touch the stars. Smiling broadly, she let her eyes roam over the picture, recognizing one or two of the constellations they had discovered, even with the different angle of view.

"That's so… beautiful!" she whispered, taken.

"Yes," Jack agreed next to her.

Sam ripped her eyes from the starlit night sky and looked over to him. The whole glider was plunged into darkness, only interrupted by the control panel's soft light, which was spectacularly highlighting his face. He looked calm and relaxed, and darned handsome. The play of darkness and light emphasized the muscles in his body and rough edges of his face. His jaw and his eyebrows were sharply accentuated, underlining the normally barely visible dangerousness he had within him, but the light washing over his sparkling, dark eyes and his grinning lips were softening the picture considerably.

"So… ready for part two?" he asked.

"Part two?" she echoed confused. What was he talking about?

An almost evil grin played around his lips but before Sam had a chance to ask, he was driving the glider down. Straight down towards Laterra. Sam felt the resistance of the atmosphere push her back into her seat while the dark, unidentifiable mass of the planet was coming closer with every second. Jack pushed the glider to an unhealthy speed, catapulting them down faster than gravity could pull them down. They were getting pressed back into the hard seats and the dark tips of trees, only dots a second before, grew larger and larger in front of them until Jack pulled the glider up, simultaneously slowing it down, and they brushed the first tree tops in a wide loop when they picked up height once more. He did a few loops, overturning them, and then let the glider roll around its own axis. Sam started laughing. While most people would have probably gotten sick, this was truly freeing for her. This was her element. And the Colonel's as well. He was a damn good pilot and Sam felt completely safe with him, which left her to thoroughly enjoy their little trip.

It was just so much fun, she felt herself relaxing completely. She hadn't had that much fun in ages!

Grinning to his ears, Jack next to her accelerated and with an almost unimaginable speed they began rushing through the planet's air. Before Sam had noticed, they had rounded the planet three times and almost as if she were sitting in a rollercoaster, she threw up her arms, cheering.

"Oh my god!" she yelled excitedly.

Just then, Jack slowed down. She turned to him, her heart thumping loud and fast with the adrenaline boost, a big, satisfied grin threatening to split her face in half.

Sighing, Sam realized they were probably on their way back. No matter how much she had enjoyed it, sometime they would have to return.

"That was so much fun," she told him.

He looked at her, contemplating, before he asked: "You wanna try flyin' the glider?"

Sam almost stopped breathing. Oh, the thought alone was mouth-watering, but unfortunately she couldn't.

"Jack," she sighed regretfully. "I don't have the Ancient gene. I can't fly it."

"Oh, you can," he opposed. "I'll just have to help you."

For a moment she tried to picture how that should work out. She had had her hands on the gliders uncountable times when she had worked on them and there hadn't even lit up a spark.

"You don't wanna?" he prompted her.

"God, yes!" she replied almost breathless.

He grinned and immediately their belts retreated. Unsure what she should do, Sam waited for him to instruct her.

"Come over," he said.

Sam stood up and crossed the little distance between them.

"Sit down in front of me," he continued.

His muscular thighs moved aside, making room for her to sit down between them. With a dry mouth and her heart now pounding against her ribcage, Sam squished in between his body and the operating panel in front of them. With a mute command from him, the belt snapped shut once more around them, pressing her back against his chest. Sam felt every contour of his body against his, his chest pushing against her back with every breath he took.

"Lay down your hands on the panel," he instructed and she complied wordlessly.

He withdrew his hands until they rested at the edge of the panel. However, he still operated the systems, having them run smoothly.

"I will command the glider to go at your orders," he told her. "So have at it!"

Sam was skeptical if that would really work, so she decided to be careful and start slow. Hesitantly, she imagined the glider making a turn to the right. To her complete surprise the spaceship unfailingly went through with her order. Concentrating hard, Sam made it turn left next and again, the glider complied. Then, getting more confident, she threw them into a series of turns; right, left, right, right, left. The glider followed whatever wish she had. Sam pushed it to full speed, racing along the sky so fast she couldn't even make out any shapes underneath them anymore, before she slowed it down and threw them into a wide loop. Behind her, Jack chuckled when they flew upside down.

Sam began to thoroughly enjoy herself and pulled up a few moves she had done with her F-16, making them zig-zag and roll around the sky as effortlessly as if she had never done anything other than piloting alien spaceships. God, this was just amazing!

Laughing unrestrained, Sam lowered the ship until they were level with the trees and with a speed she probably shouldn't have used given that it was night and she honestly wasn't seeing much, she began curving through the trees accurately. Still, Sam's trained reflexes and her experience as a pilot ensured that not even one branch was grazing the ship's outer casing.

Jack leaned forwards behind her and Sam felt his mouth brush her ear when he whispered: "Such a shame I've never seen you pilot an F-16. That would have been seriously hot!"

Sam almost missed the thick tree in front of them, on her way to spectacularly crash right into it, but he was there, covering up her slipup and raising them back into the air.

"Dammit, Jack!" she complained, her heart racing with a whole new surge of adrenaline.

"What?" he said innocently behind her.

"Do you want us to crash?" she asked, slightly out of breath.

He laid his chin down on her shoulder. "You would never crash-land us," he replied confidently. "You're a damn good pilot."

Yeah, but she was also only human! And with the way he was distracting her, there was a growing chance of her losing control over the glider, which _would_ make them tumble out of the sky.

He shifted his head and pressed a kiss to the side of her neck. Her eyes fluttered but she managed to keep them open, even if barely.

"Jack, careful!" she warned.

"Don't worry, I've got the glider," he replied distracted, his tongue running up the side of her neck.

Sam looked forwards and saw that his hands had moved up to lie next to hers on the operating panel. He had slowed the glider to a stop, having it hover in the air unmoving. Relaxing slightly upon realizing they were in no imminent danger of dropping from the sky, Sam laid her hands over his, intertwining her fingers with his. Without her conscious admission, her head fell to her left shoulder, giving him complete access to her neck. He kissed his way up to her ear, going for the spot he loved when Sam was suddenly reminded of their last time together like this. Tensing, she straightened up, pushing him away with her head. He retreated and she could almost feel the confusion coming from him.

Sam turned as much as it was possible with the way she was strapped to him and looked up into his impossibly dark eyes when she asked: "Are you going to start things you won't finish again?"

He cursed softly. "Ah yes, I should probably explain that," he said.

"Ya think?"

"I certainly meant no disrespect, Sam," he admitted. "I just had to get clear on a few things first…"

"Like what?" she asked, slightly suspicious. What did he have to get clear on? On his feelings for her? If he really wanted to do that with her? If she was worth crossing that bridge…?

Sam resolutely pushed these thoughts away. There was no use interpreting something into his words that would only get her depressed, so she waited for him to explain himself.

He squirmed behind her, getting Sam even more curious to what he could have been thinking. "Ah, look…" he began, fishing for words. "It's not that I didn't want to… it's just… _oh, for crying out loud!_ Thing is, when I packed for our escape, I didn't exactly think about… protection…"

Sam needed a moment to understand he wasn't talking about their weapons for defense but rather some method of contraception.

Baffled, the words left Sam before she could edit them in her head. "That's all?" she snorted. "You stopped because you had no condoms with you?"

From his controlled voice, she knew he was doing his best to not be hurt, embarrassed or angry with her. "I thought that a pretty important reason," he grumbled. "After all, we're not exactly in the best situation to add a child to the equation!"

Again, Sam was stunned into silence, thinking his words through. Did he mean he didn't want to bring a child into the world when they were on the run from several races, including their own, or was he averse to having a child with her in general, maybe not even wanting another child at all after what had happened with Charlie?

Sam shook her head slightly to clear her thoughts. Just as before, speculating wouldn't gain her anything and they were certainly not in any position – or relationship – to discuss children now and here.

"Jack," she said, slightly exasperated. "You _do_ know that all female officers at the SGC are on birth control, don't you?"

"Yeah, I know," he answered. "But that can't hold forever, can it?"

"How long do you think it would hold?"

"No idea."

Sam suppressed a heavy sigh. "You were the base's 2IC. I'm sure you have been briefed by the CMO on that, haven't you?"

"Probably," he admitted. "But I'm getting briefed on so many things, I can't remember everything! All I remember is that I don't have to worry about any female officer under my command on off-world missions."

Sam rolled her eyes. Yes, that was typical for him, she had to admit. "Jack…" she began to lecture. "The SGC is in a unique situation. We're at the frontlines and we're dealing with _alien_ races that could do unimaginable things to our officers. So all female officers serving on a SG team are facing high risks and threats off-world. To ensure their safety as much as possible they all have to undergo birth control and since it can always happen they get abducted or become MIA, all female officers going off-world get a special substance injected that–"

"Bottom line?" he cut her off, sounding slightly uncomfortable.

Sam chuckled soundlessly. What was it with men and their aversion to listen to 'women's problems'?

"Bottom line, Jack," she summed it up. "I am on birth control. A special supplement especially provided for the SGC that holds up to six months. And with everything I had to go through on P3T-643 and with Nirrti, Janet decided to better be on the safe side and gave me a new shot. So, considering the time that's passed, I'm still safe for over four months."

And they would only have to worry after these months.

"Oh…" he said, rather intelligently.

Sam almost giggled at hearing his irritation. He had thought to do the right thing by stopping in time. He had tried to be considerate and for that, Sam admired him. She was somehow even proud that he had kept their situation in mind and not just thrown all caution over board only to get to sleep with her. Even if it _had_ been in vain. He hadn't had to hold back at all and going by his cranky groan, he slowly became aware of that fact.

"You could have just told me then?" she suggested. Because then she could have dispelled his concerns right then and there. But he had decided then to take the safe route and leave them both to one of their most uncomfortable nights.

He looked at her as if she was crazy even suggesting that. "Right _then_? Hell no, for crying out loud! It was difficult enough getting out of there with the way you were acting!"

Insecure, Sam felt herself retreat. "What was wrong with the way I acted?" she inquired cautiously.

"Nothing," he assured her. "It was just too much, too fast. I was about to lose all control with you."

Still unsure, she gnawed on her lower lip. "I wouldn't have minded…" she admitted quietly, hoping she wasn't trespassing forbidden ground.

He laid his head against hers, groaning. "Sam, watch what you're saying! This here is definitely the wrong place to provoke me!"

Her jaw set in determination. "You were the one to start this!" she reminded him. "So make up your mind what you want me to do!"

He sighed frustrated. "In all honesty? I need you to stay away from me as much as I need you close to me…" he confessed. And strangely, Sam could totally understand. It was a feeling she was very familiar with. Their logic mind was telling them to stay away from the other. Their military training continually fought the attraction between them, whether they were consciously aware of it or not. Still, they were so drawn in to each other that they simply couldn't stay away from each other.

He groaned but this time more out of frustration. "I want to be with you, Sam, really! But every time I feel like I'm crossing a forbidden border, as if I would take advantage of you."

"You're not," she assured him. "We're not military anymore. There's nothing standing between us anymore."

"We could still return to Earth sometime," he cautioned. "And then you would regret it."

The hell she would!

"Jack, you yourself said that even if we would return someday, the Air Force has already enough reasons to court-martial us to care about our relationship," she reminded him.

"Sam, it's something entirely different to call your superior officer by his given name than to sleep with him!"

She snorted. "If it hadn't been for the frat regs, I would have done that years ago already!" she exclaimed. "So now that we're finally free to do it, what's hindering us?"

He choked soundlessly when his breath got stuck somewhere within his throat. "Really?" he inquired.

She smiled, feeling oddly freed now that their feelings were finally coming into the open. "I told you, didn't I?" she whispered. "I love you."

"Sam," he breathed out before he pushed against her, taking her lips in a burning kiss. She let him prevail for a moment, relishing in the feeling of his lips against hers and his body surrounding hers. She would probably never get enough of kissing him.

He ended the kiss shortly after. "You sure?" he asked with his lips still on hers.

"Yes," she confirmed breathless. "So, let's get back to the base?"


	40. Uniting

_**Author's notes**_ _: IMPORTANT: This chapter contains explicit content so if you do not wish to read that, you can skip the chapter without missing anything vital of the plot.  
_

 _Then, as usual, thank you to all who read, follow and review, and special thanks to Dafidowndilly for beta-ing this chapter!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty – Uniting_

Sam had literally no idea how they had made it back to their tent. The flight back to the base had been hazy at best. Jack had handled the flight and aside from the fact that they had been going with much too much speed, nothing had filtered in for Sam. They had somehow stumbled their way through the dark corridors of the base without getting lost, Sam paying no attention to anything apart from his large frame at her side that pulled her along by their joined hands.

They totally skipped dinner, not even thinking of it and went straight for their tent. Sam pulled the flap open and hurried inside, Jack only inches behind her.

Routinely, she sat down on her sleeping bag and went for her boots when he was suddenly on her. His lips feverishly pressed against hers and unable to wait any longer, Sam opened her mouth, running her tongue over his lips. He groaned and let her enter, entangling his tongue with hers. When she retreated he followed her, his tongue sweeping through her mouth. As if on autopilot, Sam managed to get her boots off and unceremoniously threw them somewhere in the tent, her socks following only seconds later.

Jack pushed her down on the sleeping bag and once more settled on top of her. With quite a bit difficulty due to the lack of space Sam pushed her hands in between their bodies and began working on the buttons of his BDU jacket. Without interrupting their kiss, one of his hands reached for her shirt, pulling it free from her pants with a quick tug. Sam's pulse began racing wildly when his large, calloused hand went under her shirt to caress her stomach. By now her breathing was irregular and warmth began to spread through her body, slowly heating it up. Anticipation left Sam's body tingling with awareness, fueled by the heady thought of what was happening. _Jack_ was kissing her. Jack was _kissing_ her. And even more, he was running his hand up her stomach, working his way with feathery touches towards her breasts. _Finally_ , she and Jack were together.

Sam reached out towards him but instead of pushing the unbuttoned jacket from his shoulders as she had intended, she laid her hands on his face, cupping his cheeks. While she stroked her fingers over his cheeks and his jaw, tracing the bones underneath his skin, she tilted her head and deepened their kiss. He groaned and pushed up higher to meet the new angle, his body sliding over hers in a way that promised so much more. Sam broke their kiss with the sharp intake of breath she couldn't help when she felt his body move over hers.

Jack used the short breather to get rid of his jacket, dropping it somewhere. When he returned to her, his hands gripped the edge of Sam's shirt and instinctively knowing what he was about to do, she raised up enough to allow him to pull her shirt over her head. With one sharp pull, her shirt was gone, flying over his shoulder to join his clothes somewhere in the back. As soon as the obstacle was out of their way, Sam threw her arms around his neck, pulling herself up to him to kiss him again. He met her half-way and the moment their lips met, everything around Sam seemed to vanish, nothing but Jack existing anymore, all her senses only concentrating on him. His scent was overwhelming with their close proximity and the narrow space within the tent. His body lay on hers, pressing them into the ground but obviously not wanting her to be uncomfortable, he shifted so he was leaning more on his side. His hand returned to her body and with deliberate strokes, he ran his fingers over her stomach, slowly sliding them up until they reached her breasts. Sam shivered under his ministrations even though her sports bra still prevented any direct skin-to-skin contact. Their kisses turned open-mouthed with the need for oxygen while his fingers traced the skin of her breasts her bra wasn't covering. Meanwhile, Sam pulled his shirt out of his pants and shoved it up, wanting to feel his skin too. Getting the obvious hint, he straightened up and pulled the shirt over his head. From where she was lying Sam now had a spectacular view of his abs that were flexing with his movements. He wasn't one of those men overly muscled but his body was nicely toned, fit beyond his age with his newfound strength, and Sam could see his muscles working under his tanned skin. She reached out and laid her hands on his abs, splaying her fingers before slowly and gently moving them over his skin. Jack waited calmly, letting her run her fingers over his torso, silently watching as she familiarized herself with his body.

Sam sat up when he made no move to lie back down with her, pressing herself up against him. He tilted his head, smirking down on her and his dark eyes blazing in a promising way, but held his ground, pushing back against her when she settled against him. Since he was kneeling over her, Sam was now way shorter than him and her position only left her level with his collarbone. She stretched and pressed her lips against his throat, feeling his racing pulse drum right under his skin. Slowly, torturingly, she trailed open-mouthed kisses down his neck, following her playful hands down his pecs and his stomach. Jack groaned audibly in response and his hands cradled her head, his fingers gently fisting in her hair. Sam was fully enjoying herself, reveling in the feeling of his tense muscles and the trembles she caused in them with her fingers and her mouth, but she could feel the moment his patience snapped.

Jack's hands left her head and reached for her bra, grabbing the bottom and pulling it over her head hurriedly. The moment she was bared however, he was neither looking at her nor starting to touch her. With one hand under her chin he drew her up to him, lowering down as much as needed so he could thoroughly kiss her. His other hand went around her back and pulled her against him. Sam's chest got pressed against his, his sparse chest hair scraping over her sensitive skin. At the same time Sam's hands were roaming over his back, up to his neck to play with the short strands of his hair and then drifting back down toward his belt. The feel of skin on skin, their kisses, their touches, their combined scents and the sounds echoing in the small space of the tent were an onslaught of impressions that stormed Sam's senses and when an involuntary sigh from her escaped into his mouth, she could feel him grin into their kiss.

Finally, his hands were brushing her side, grazing her waist before one of them wandered to her chest. With a sudden move she hadn't anticipated, he cupped one breast and began working it. Breaking their kiss, Sam let her head fall forward, resting it against his collarbone as the sensations his fingers were causing sapped her body of its strength and made her eyes flutter. Whenever they opened, Sam could gaze at his fingers on her skin and it had her marveling at the stark contrast between his tan hand and her pale flesh.

With a satisfied growl, Jack went for her neck, slowly kissing his way down until his mouth reached her other breast. Sam arched her back for him, pushing her chest against him, her eyes closing involuntarily with the overwhelming sensations coursing through her. Her whole body turned excessively sensitive, every place he was touching burning with warmth and need, and slowly her whole body relaxed, muscles turning loose. Instinctively reacting to her, one of Jack's arms went around her back, holding her up against him when her body positively melted against him, pulling her impossibly closer. With a quiet grunt he used his superior strength to draw her up to him and settled her on one of his thighs so they were of the same height. Said thigh was now pressing against her throbbing center and Sam groaned. Her fingers clawed into his back but apparently he didn't mind going by the pleased grunt coming from his throat. His tongue was running attentively over her breasts, occasionally sucking her skin into his mouth, and Sam felt her mind going blissfully blank. She had been with other men before but this sensation, this feeling of losing all connection to her surroundings was new to her. She clung to his shoulders, his solid presence the only thing she was still aware of.

"Sam…!" Jack murmured urgently. First she thought it merely to be him mumbling her name until her befuddled mind realized he was calling out to her.

"Sam!" he insisted. "Slow down or this will be over fast!"

Slow down? What was she doing? Only then Sam realized she had begun rocking herself against him, only tiny movements but with their closeness one of her legs was brushing a sensitive part of him. Oops. Blushing, she apologized under her breath. She didn't want him to be uncomfortable.

He grinned lopsidedly at her and caressing her cheek with a finger, he tipped her chin up so she had to look at him. His dark eyes burned into hers with so much desire that Sam felt herself shudder in response. Seeing her blush brought an amused smile to his lips but he was serious when he told her: "You are so beautiful."

She smiled back earnestly. "You're not that bad yourself," she answered.

He chuckled lightly before kissing her again. Holding her to his chest, he lowered them onto the sleeping bag again but this time he made sure to hold himself up off her. His free hand that wasn't supporting his weight moved from her chin down her neck to her collarbone and after a thorough detour over her breasts that left her breathless and her body trembling slightly, he let it slide down her body until he reached her belt. With impatient moves he opened it, followed by her pants' button and zipper. When he gripped her pants at the waist, she raised her hips, helping him push them down her hips. All the while his mouth never left hers, kissing her with so much feeling that Sam felt like she was floating. She barely had enough concentration left to wriggle her pants down her legs but finally she got rid of them. Jack's hands were already trailing over her legs, teasing her with feather light touches. To give him better access, she parted them. Somehow, despite this being their first time together, Sam didn't feel embarrassed. He managed to make her feel special and treasured and every step she allowed him to go further, he was thoroughly acknowledging. His hands were almost worshipping her body and he had a knack for finding the right spots that would just drive her wild, making any thoughts of embarrassment fly out of the window anyways. By now it was already getting difficult to continue kissing him because she was panting, gasping even, and her body was doing uncontrolled jerks.

Jack broke their kiss and laid his forehead against hers, looking directly into her eyes when his hand suddenly laid right onto her center. Sam's body unintentionally rose from the ground, pushing against his, an audible moan erupting from her throat. Her whole body shuddered when he did first tentative strokes over her panties. Heat, warmth and wetness was pooling in her lower abdomen with an almost astounding speed as one of Jack's long fingers slowly ran over her, driving her crazy. Sam feared she was about to lose it before he had even started. He on the other hand seemed to have incredible self-control, she noticed vaguely. She would have long ago abandoned any control. In fact, she had.

"Jack!" she urged, reaching down until her hands laid over his six, pulling him in towards her. Apparently, she had taken him by surprise with her move because he wasn't fast enough to stop her. His hips bumped against hers, trapping his hand between them, and his arousal pressed against her center. For a moment, Sam's whole body trembled uncontrolled while his froze.

"Shit, Sam!" he cursed violently, breathlessly. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"Jack…" she all but whimpered. She really needed more!

And apparently, despite her temporary lack of any communication skills, he understood. With another barely concealed curse he set about ridding her of her last piece of clothing, Sam eagerly helping him. When they were done, his hand immediately returned to its former spot and now feeling his rough skin on her own, sensitive one, Sam moaned. A responding groan tore from him when he began exploring her. Sam's senses were entirely concentrated on what he was doing to her and when he slipped a finger inside her, her body tensed, creating sweet friction. He was keeping it slow, careful so he wasn't hurting her when he began to move his finger in and out of her rhythmically but her body moved with his, trying to make up for what he was still denying her.

Sam's whole mind concentrated on the spot where they were joined, where he was touching her that intimately, and her breath faltered with the incredible feelings he was evoking in her when he added another finger. The action conjured up a familiar feeling of fullness and yet it was still different, still not enough and Sam needed more. She moved her hips, trying to increase the friction but much to her dismay she didn't really succeed with that. As good as it felt, just his fingers weren't enough, weren't what she really wanted.

Jack lowered his head down next to hers so that she could feel his fast breath wafting across her neck when he ground out through tightly gritted teeth: "Patience, Sam…!"

She shook her head, unable to form coherent sentences. "Jack, I… Want you," she whispered. In fact, she _needed_ him. Right now.

Now it was his turn to shake his head. "Not until you're ready."

God, she was! She was more than ready! She had wanted this for years! To hell with foreplay already! They had had _years_ of foreplay!

"I am!" she insisted. "In fact, if you're going to wait any longer, it will be too late."

He snorted and Sam felt his fingers leave her. She heard the clanging sounds of his belt and then the rustling of his clothes. _Finally_ , she thought relieved.

The thought of Jack finally making love to her was making her toes curl and something tighten within her. Finally, finally, _finally_ , was all she could think.

He returned to her and this time he laid down fully on her, holding himself up with his forearms around her head. His hips immediately came into contact with hers and Sam could feel his arousal press against her center. She reveled in the feeling of its heat against her skin but she was still lucid enough to notice his length. For a moment she doubted herself, asking herself if he hadn't had a point when insisting to prepare her. It had been years since she had been with a man and from what she felt and assumed from his general build, he wasn't exactly average sized. It was making her slightly nervous.

As if he was picking up on it, he began kissing her once again, deep and passionately. His tongue thrust into her mouth, imitating what he was about to do to her while his hips began rolling against hers. Almost immediately Sam forgot to breathe, losing herself to the rhythm and the incredible feelings. The friction he was creating between their bodies was unbelievably good and Sam was reduced to a shuddering puddle beneath him. He trailed a hand down her leg and then grabbed it under her knee, bending it up. Sam understood his intent and spread her legs, making room for him to move.

He drew back and the next time their bodies connected, Sam could feel him push into her. He was going slow, giving her time to adjust but after an initial resistance to his intrusion she soon felt herself relax, surrendering to him. It had been a while for Sam so there was a slight amount of pain that accompanied his advance but the mere fact that she had wanted this so badly for years, that she yearned for it right now with her heart, mind and body, was letting her forget about the pain. He pushed into her fully and Sam felt wonderfully filled. For a moment he halted, panting above her and with her hands on his back, Sam could feel sweat break out all over his body.

When she felt ready, Sam made a tentative move with her hips to tell him it was okay to go on. He groaned at her rather timid approach and his head fell to her shoulder, his massive shoulders trembling above her. Slowly, he drew back and then pushed back in.

Sam moaned and whimpered, not able to hold anything back when he began establishing a slow rhythm. He drove into her in a controlled manner but still Sam felt her whole body lighting up. They were _finally_ joined. The knowledge alone was about to drive her over the edge. Biting down hard on her lower lip, she tried to hold on, to hold out, when he slowly began to pick up the pace. Gradually, his thrusts became faster, shorter. Sam groaned when he hit a sensitive spot within her and immediately picking up on her reaction, he continually went for this spot, driving against it almost every time he thrust back in. By now, sweat was running down Sam's body in rivulets from the heat that was all-consuming her but her hips still matched his thrusts, moving with him. Her body rose off the ground, pressing closer to his and one of his hands went under her six to hold her against him. Slowly, he began losing control, Sam could feel it. He was using more strength, pressing her into the sleeping bag beneath her, forgetting about his unnatural strength. Sam didn't mind. He could do whatever he wanted as long as he didn't stop. Little by little, his pace was getting faster and his aim swayed. His body trembled, close to the edge, and Sam wasn't far away either. She was hovering on the edge, her lower body tightening around him so much she was idly surprised he could still move but he continued on steadily. Sam was bowstring-tight, wanting, needing the release but her body was so overloaded, she failed to let go.

"Sam…" Jack groaned into her ear and once more her whole body shuddered in response to him.

His hand left her six, deliberately sliding around her thigh before going in between their bodies. Before Sam had any chance to realize his intention, his thumb had found her most sensitive spot and pressed down on it. Sam exploded immediately and violently. Her whole body went into spasms, pulsating and contracting around him. Unrestrained sounds came from her throat but lacking any strength to put force behind them, they were almost quiet. The whole world tuned out for Sam, all her senses focusing only on her mind-blowing orgasm. Blood rushed through her body wildly and her breathing was erratic. His ongoing thrusts were drawing it out for her until she felt him go rigid and let go as well.

Only gradually did Sam return from her high, the picture in front of her eyes swaying and her ears ringing with the echoes of her harsh breathing and her rapid heartbeat. Her body was way too warm and for once her mind was shut down. Feeling thoroughly spent and drained, Sam struggled to stay awake. This had by far been the best sex she'd ever had. Oh yes, she had _known_ they would be good together!

Sluggishly, Sam tried to find out what was happening around her. She noticed him leave her and then lay down next to her. Jack pulled her close to him as he settled in next to her, his warm body a welcome shield against the cold settling in when the sweat on her body started to cool. His arm went around her, pulling her against him and his head buried into her neck. His breathing was still too fast, she noticed, when she felt it against her exposed skin. He pulled their blankets over them and then she heard him yawn. Their whole strength totally exhausted, Sam also felt sleep pulling at her. She couldn't remember ever having felt this relaxed, satiated and… sleepy. She just couldn't keep her eyes open.

"Jack…?" she slurred.

He pressed a kiss to the skin of her shoulder without moving. "It's alright," he said, knowing instinctively how she was feeling. "Sleep."

She nodded with a curt movement but before finally falling asleep, she murmured: "Love you…"

She felt his mouth move against the skin on her neck but before she had even deduced if he was kissing her or answering something, sleep had claimed her.

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The next morning Sam had a hard time waking up. The Major felt herself toeing the line of awareness for some time but her body felt so heavy and at the same time relaxed, she didn't even want to wake up. Dimly she picked up on her surroundings and leisurely did a quick inventory on herself. If she was correct, then she was still lying in the same position she'd fallen asleep in last night. Apparently she hadn't turned or moved the entire night. And Sam wasn't really surprised. Her body ached and was sore in a way she hadn't felt in years. The last time had probably been sometime after her first missions with SG-1 when she had had to work back up to her former strength and stamina after having had a desk job at the Pentagon, even if admittedly this was a whole other kind of muscle aches.

Idly Sam thought she should probably get up and have a shower because after the night she had had, she would be in dire need of one to wash off the sweat and… other things. Still, even the _thought_ of moving wasn't appealing to her. She was resting as comfortably as she could while sleeping on the cold ground in a tent off-world. She felt warm and astonishingly rested. Sam had no idea how late it was and how much time had passed since she'd all but passed out last night, but this had been the night with the most decent sleep she'd gotten in weeks! And for the first time she hadn't been hunted by nightmares. For the first time she'd slept through with a dreamless night. Guess even her traumatized mind hadn't been able to conjure up any nightmares after a night like the last one!

Sam could feel an involuntary blush creep up her cheeks at the mere thought of the last night. She and Jack… She and Jack had… They had… well, screwed the frat regs. Quite literally.

Sam knew she should feel embarrassed. She should regret it. She should probably freak out over what they had done, but it just felt so right to her that those reactions seemed almost ridiculous to her. They had finally let go of everything standing between them and had lived out the feelings they had denied each other for years. And honestly? Sam thought they deserved it. They had given everything for their country and their planet. They had faced practically everything: various injuries – from twisted joints to broken bones to pierced body parts to various burns, electro shocks and energy jolts to getting shot down with weapons –, abduction, foothold situations, lockdowns, alien infections, alien possessions and so much more. They had endured whatever fate had thrown their way in order to protect the human race which was blissfully unaware. They had saved their country and Earth several times so yes, they had given their all and anything beyond for the duty they had sworn to serve.

And they had denied themselves so much for this duty, from their true love they had never been able to acknowledge openly to any possibility of a life they could have had together. They had gotten hurt so often in the process, feeling wounded by a rejection or an attempt to move on the other had tried to do when their situation turned critical, and still they had been expected to bounce back from that unaffected. And for what? For them to be put under arrest because of the mere _possibility_ that they could pose a threat to their country and their planet, with the prospect of getting turned into guinea pigs for the rest of their lives. They had practically given everything for what they had sworn to protect, doing without almost any personal life as well, only to have their own men turn against them at the first hint of a dire situation.

So for Sam it was finally enough. She would have never stopped working for the Air Force on her own and if she hadn't gone through all the events from her encounter with Adrian Conrad, to her abduction on P3T-643, to her prolonged stay in the infirmary to her possession by Nirrti at approximately the same time – if it would have been only one of these experiences - she most likely would have even let the Air Force's scientists examine her and analyze any changes done to her. But with the way her situation was right now? She was thoroughly fed up with being controlled and not having any say in it, and figured they could all go and do their shit on their own. She was out of it, for good.

And seeing that she had deserted, she had effectively _put_ herself out of it. There was no way of returning for her that wouldn't end with her in a military prison, so she could at least make the best of her situation. Which also meant she could go fuck whoever the hell she wanted, including her former CO.

That thought alone should probably outrage Sam going by what military training had drilled into her but Sam found herself not caring any longer. And given the way the night had turned out, Sam would have had serious trouble regretting it even if she earnestly tried. Naturally Sam had had lovers before but she could undoubtedly say that the sex with Jack had been the best she'd had so far in her life. Because it hadn't only been about the sex. By now Sam felt an even deeper emotional link to Jack than before, them having connected on a deep, truly instinctive basis. They had a unique understanding of each other before but they had always been forced to hold back with the other. Last night however they had thrown all barriers, all obstacles standing between them over board and had bared themselves to each other. They had finally crossed the last line. They had abandoned all restrictions, all hindrances with as much determination as passion. And it had connected them to each other in a way, physically as well as emotionally, that they had always been careful to not allow between them.

They had a special relationship. They had understood each other so well before and they already had a stable relationship to begin with that they could build upon. They had an almost instinctive understanding of each other and knew the other almost as well as themselves. They knew the others likes and dislikes, knew what the other would or wouldn't feel comfortable with. There was also a deep trust between them, each one trusting the other with their lives as well as their hearts, knowing unfailingly that these were safe with them. So going by that, their relationship was steadier than most marriages. As far as Sam was concerned, she had been in a relationship with him all this time, even if this relationship lacked any physical component. They had been faithful to each other all the time, unable to get into a relationship with any other person, their true love fully devoted to the other. With the trust, the care, the concern, the love and the respect between them they had a rock-steady foundation no newly created relationship had and so doing the final step wasn't that large of a change. It was simply adding another level to their relationship that had been in the making for a long time, already overdue for years. And now they had added a whole new facet to their former relationship, a new level they could never undo, Sam feared. This was a one-way street. Upon entering it they had no choice but to continue down this road whatever happened along the way.

Shifting next to her ripped Sam from her leisurely drifting thoughts and made her concentrate on her surroundings. Turning just the slightest bit, Sam realized there was something heavy and scratchy covering her still sensitive skin and she recognized it as one the military blankets they had brought with them, the way it was moving over her skin also telling her that she was lying naked under it. The blanket was not what kept her so comfortably warm though. There was something big, large and decidedly warm next to her that was pressed against her, warming her up. Jack's body, she realized with another automatic blush. Suddenly very self-conscious, Sam became aware of the spots where his warmth spread over onto her own body and she realized that they had managed to entangle themselves in their sleep again. While Sam had apparently been dead to the world he had slept as messily as he always did when he was relaxed. For once his usual alert while off-world seemed to have left him and he had moved as much as he liked. While Sam distinctly remembered having fallen asleep on her back, he had snuggled up to her during the night so much she was now lying on her side with his body pressed against her back. One of his large arms was wrapped around her from behind, encircling her stomach, and if Sam was right, then the warm spot over her head was his other arm. His head was buried in the crook of her neck, his breath washing across her bare collarbone from where his half-open mouth brushed her throat and his hair tickled her cheekbone. His long legs were entwined with hers and Sam could feel everything from his chest down to his hips press against her from behind.

Her cheeks warmed up even more and Sam imagined her blush to spread down her throat and her neck. This was decidedly more intimate than what they'd done the previous night…!

And Sam was somehow astonished. Him giving in to her and the burning, unresolved sexual tension between them was one thing, but this closeness? It left her slightly baffled. The Colonel wasn't one for showing feelings or emotions, so Sam hadn't really expected to wake up in his arms after making love, even if they had slept in each other's arms with increasing regularity. But then clothes and blankets had been between them and they had never curled into each other like this! Yes, they had sought out the other's presence, lying against the other's body, but this? This was so much closer, so much more intimate, physically as well as emotionally.

Sam felt him shift again and then his mouth pressed a lingering kiss behind her ear, telling her he was awake. Sam couldn't help the content sigh with which she reacted and she could hear the smile in his voice when he said cheerily: "Good morning, sleeping beauty."

Sam turned her head to where she assumed his voice to come from. She blinked repeatedly, having some difficulty prying her eyes open. She felt drained and beaten but in such a good way, she would have stretched lazily like a cat if that hadn't meant she'd have to move. She needed two attempts to steady the picture in front of her eyes until she could see him clearly. He was now leaning over her, his growing hair adorably tussled and a wide, boyish smirk gracing his features that made him look almost half his age.

He waited patiently while she squinted up at him, her sluggish head trying to catch up. When he assumed her to finally be with him, he lowered his head until his forehead rested against hers, brushing the tip of her nose with his.

"Hey there, gorgeous," he said, smiling widely in such a relaxed manner Sam felt her heart open up to him all the more. If _this_ was the reaction she got out of him after one night together, she should have thrown caution and certain regulations into the wind years before!

She smiled earnestly and with a slightly raspy voice she answered: "Hey there, handsome."

His grin turned even wider, about to split his face. He looked almost radiant, glowing with contentment and self-satisfaction. His gaze burned into hers with a new intensity that made Sam's body tingle and her overly aware that there was nothing shielding their bodies from each other's. She could feel his muscles work against her skin, feel the strength it took him to hover over her as he was.

His voice was all confidence and teasing when he inquired: "Had a good night?"

Sam sighed upon remembering and even she could hear the content undertone when she told him: "The best."

"Me too," he agreed and then leaned down to brush his lips over hers. Sam knew he had intended to keep it a light, short kiss but she wanted more. Reaching up, she threw her arms around his neck and pulled him down to her while simultaneously opening her mouth for him. He indulged her and with a slow, unhurried pace, their tongues met in the middle, sliding around the others deliberately.

When Jack drew back once more, Sam's breathing had quickened. "Hm, I could so get used to that…!" he drawled, dropping a quick peck to her nose before he settled in with his forehead against hers once more. Sam couldn't agree more.

One of his restless hands began running over her bare shoulder and collarbone. Sam sighed languorously. They should have definitely done this way sooner!

"So…" Jack began. "What d'you wanna do today?"

"Do?" Sam asked back. As in she actually had to stand up sometime and do something? The thought of just staying where she was with him was so much more appealing.

He snorted. "Don't tell me workaholic-Carter wants to spend her day in bed? Who woulda thought?"

She smirked up at him. "Maybe you just make the prospect appealing enough?" she teased.

He grinned back. "I like the way you think," he said, but then sighed: "And as much as I _love_ the thought, I fear I'm going to gnaw on you if I don't get some food soon."

Aaand this was supposed to get her to move?

"How about breakfast?" he suggested. "Or rather lunch, as it is."

She sighed, feeling that for now their time together had come to an end. She really didn't want to leave their little sanctuary, the break from reality their tent had given them for the time being, but Sam was aware that, sooner rather than later, her body would demand food as well.

"Alright," she agreed. "But I need a shower first."

His smirk turned positively wolfish upon hearing her words. "What a coincidence," he stated. "It seems I do, too. So… care for some company?"

Sam laughed, nodding. Somehow she had the distinct impression this would turn out the longest shower she'd ever taken, far, far away from her usual military showers. And yet somehow she guessed she wouldn't even mind.

* * *

 _Gawd, I struggled so much with this chapter... I've never written anything like that before and I wanted it to be realistic and in character and still somewhat classy, so it turned into A LOT of work that was only recently finished. Hence the slight delay in posting..._


	41. Desiring

_**Author's notes**_ _: So sorry for the long delay but thank you all SO much for your encouraging and kind words for the last chapter! Again a_ _ **warning**_ _, this chapter will contain explicit content but you can skip it without missing too much of the plot._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-One – Desiring_

Jack averted his eyes for the umpteenth time to roam them aimlessly over the sunlit surroundings, trying to find _anything_ to capture his attention. Which was a failed effort before he had even started it, as he knew quite well. Laterra was completely abandoned aside from them and the fact that Carter was working right behind where he was sitting at the hangar's opened gate, his legs dangling over the edge of the departure platform, would ensure that there could have started a war between the Goa'uld and the Asgard right in front of him and Jack wouldn't even be interested, much less inclined to watch. He was overly aware of the clatter of his former 2IC behind him where she was working on the engine of another glider with what limited tools they had brought and what she had found around the base. She was faintly humming, something he had found her to have started doing since… well, the day – or rather night – they had just thrown all rules out of the window. It was a sign of her being completely relaxed and happy.

Jack smirked at the mere memory of the night it had all changed between them. It had been a rather memorable night as far as he was concerned. He had spent years dreaming up this moment in countless varieties, imagining innumerable possibilities of how they could have gotten together, and reality had even been far better. Carter had been the sole star of his dreams for years but he had to say all his imagination was no match for the reality!

They were incredibly compatible and the deep connection they had already had before ensured they could plunge right into this new aspect of their relationship, skipping all first awkward trying and embarrassment. Jack knew exactly how far he could go with her and how much he could push her and even when he was somehow unsure whether or not she liked what he was doing then he could read her reactions accurately enough to know immediately if he should stop. It made it amazingly easy for them to be together and Jack had to admit that he thoroughly enjoyed every moment between them. Suddenly all tension and all distance between them had vanished into nothingness when they had finally allowed themselves what they had been always denied, only to be replaced by an even deeper trust and closeness.

Jack had never felt so connected to another woman as he had to Sam. They were complete opposites and still similar. Their personalities couldn't differ more – he was closed off, sarcastic, distant, sometimes harsh and complicated, and she was open, friendly, more communicative and honest – and still both their lives were mostly dominated by the Air Force and the Stargate Program, defining them to be who they were and essentially bringing them together in the first place. But despite the obvious differences they had always been connected somehow. She had always seen beyond the gruff exterior he displayed and most of the time only saw the few good personality traits she claimed he had, and Jack was aware that Carter was one in a million. And that he was incredibly lucky she had settled for him when he knew she could have had about anyone.

Still, despite all their differences they had been well aware of, they worked out quite spectacularly. With all the insecurities, distance and restraints finally out of the way, they were an even better team than before. With each new facet Jack learned of her, he managed to read her even better, by now recognizing her mood by the faintest changes in her body language.

And, Jack wasn't about to deny this fact, he thoroughly enjoyed getting to know Carter even better. He felt another smirk cross his features. In short, he had to admit the sex with his 2IC was fantastic. So fantastic even, he was seriously regretting not having given in to his urges years before. That would have surely been worth the court-martial! But Jack was aware that it had never been the thought of a court-martial that had made him keep his hands off of her. The only thing really hindering him had ironically always been her. He had never wanted to endanger her career or put her in a position she didn't want to be in, so he had held back on her account.

But ever since they had given in to their urges, he found he couldn't keep his hands off her. It was as if he was addicted. With almost every gaze she would send him or every movement her body did, he would immediately feel drawn in to her, his blood pressure spiking in an almost conditioned response. Given, with a few actions she had really been provoking him but Jack was well aware that he was imagining almost just as much of these actions. Still, now that he had her consent and no, absolutely _no_ , intention anymore to hold back with her, Jack explored whatever opportunity he was given. And Carter was always on board. In fact, whenever they touched nowadays it was very likely to lead to complete abandonment of whatever they had just tried to work on around the base. They had mostly given up on the control room's database because them standing next to each other trying to study an alien language simply wasn't working out for the moment. And Jack knew that _that_ was mostly his fault. His mind could get awfully creative when he became bored…

Jack chanced a quick glance over his shoulder at his silently working 2IC, only to almost choke. Oh, god…!

Swallowing, the Colonel deduced that the next thing they would need to stop doing together would be the repairs on the spaceships or Sam would never finish.

Frozen, he watched Sam bend over, her whole upper body disappearing in a hole where she had dismantled a maintenance panel on the glider's outer casing. The blonde crown of her hair bobbed at the edge of his sight but aside from that all the Colonel could still see were her long legs and her toned six. She was standing on her toes to be able to reach up high enough and was slightly swaying in the off-balance position. Her BDU pants curved oh-so-nicely around her six he had spent a few occasions exploring thoroughly with his hands and immediately, his mind shot back to these experiences, leaving him to dry-swallow uncomfortably. His pants tightened in a betraying way but Jack thought he really shouldn't disturb her in her work again. It had happened a few times already and if he continued like that, she had to get fed up with him sometime.

Still, Jack couldn't look away, his eyes tracking whatever small movement she made. His breathing quickened and his blood began pounding in his ears.

Carter's upper body emerged from the insides of the glider and standing with her back to him, Jack saw her reach up to swipe her arm over her sweaty forehead. For a moment she seemed to think, standing motionless with her hands on her hips which made her back curve nicely but then she appeared to settle on something. With unconscious, purposeful moves, she shed her BDU jacket, revealing the black tank top underneath.

Jack almost groaned when she dropped her jacket on the ground carelessly. He knew her whole attention was focused on the task in front of her and she hadn't meant anything by the innocent gesture, still he was on his feet before he had even consciously registered the movement. With his hands balled to fists, he contemplated just leaving the room. He definitely shouldn't stay.

Jack had just convinced himself that that was, indeed, a good idea when she leaned forwards, placing her hands on either side of the maintenance panel to look into it, her back arching in a graceful curve.

Oh, to hell with restraint and determination! Jack had crossed the distance between them before he had even noticed.

Sam inhaled sharply the moment he pressed against her from behind, not having anticipated him. Her body in front of his tensed surprised but immediately he felt her recognize him and relax, leaning back against him. She sighed but despite Jack's worries not annoyed. The sigh was all feminine contentment and pleasure.

Jack groaned at hearing the sound and pushed even closer to her, pressing her against the glider in front of them. Possessively, his arms went around her body, his hands unfailingly reaching up to lay on her breasts. Not wasting a second, he began to work them, his fingers rubbing her through her clothes. She moaned and threw her head back against his shoulder. Jack turned his head and kissed his way up her neck, feeling her pulse race underneath her smooth skin. One of her hands went up and tangled in his short hair, drawing him even closer to her while the other came to rest at the side of his hip, fisting in his BDU pants' material. Yep, once again she was clearly on board with his intentions.

Impatiently, Jack pulled her top from her pants and pushed it up before he tugged down her bra. He didn't bother with shedding the clothes, just as long as he got to where his fingers itched to be. She shuddered against him, her breathing hitching when he laid his hands onto her bare skin, instantly beginning to explore it. Her legs parted immediately, partly to give him access should he want it and partly to steady her footing because she was starting to sway in his arms. Her back arched so she could press her breasts further into his hands and this pushed her six into his pelvis. Jack groaned when her backside slid over his already painful arousal. When she noticed his reaction she just repeated the move languorously, her behavior all feminine confidence. Jack grinned, loving how comfortable they had grown with each other and that she allowed herself to tease him like that even if he had to claw onto his Special-Forces-trained endurance to not lose all control immediately. She brought him to the edge unlike no other woman ever had. And Jack knew that with Sam he didn't even have to hold back. She could handle whatever he dished out. Jack realized that with the high tension and incredible sexual attraction between them, he had been close to losing control completely with her once or twice and had feared he had gotten too rough with her but however their nights (or days) with each other turned out, she was always floating around afterwards with this big, satisfied smile on her beautiful face that just made him want to take her all over again. So until now, he had at least done nothing she felt she needed to stop.

Jack turned his face into her hair and inhaled deeply. Her scent was truly addicting. Whenever he smelled a whiff, it was like adding oil to his blazing body, making him burn even brighter for her.

Jack pressed a leg in between her parted legs and pushed it up, lifting her up until she was barely standing on her toes anymore, her whole weight being held up by his body. His knee bumped into the glider in front of them and finding a good hold, Jack leaned against it, ensuring his leg was safely nestled between hers. Sam whimpered something unintelligible before her hips experimentally rocked against his thigh. Jack squeezed her breasts approvingly, enjoying her movement as much as she herself did because her six would press against his erection every time she moved like that.

Her hand in his hair tightened and with a sharp pull, she dragged him in to her, her mouth seeking his out. The kiss was instantly all mouth, tongue and teeth. Neither of them was going at it slowly or considerately, there were both giving what they knew the other would need. A red haze of pure lust enveloped them, drowning out any and all signs of the reality around them.

Without interrupting the kiss, Jack let one of his hands travel down her body until it rested upon her slowly rotating hips. For a second he simply let himself feel her movements under his fingers before he resumed his initial intention. His hand laid onto her center, cupping her over her clothes, the heel of his hand digging into the material, pushing it against her most sensitive spot. She broke the kiss, her whole body twitching and jerking within his arms while she tried to breathe. Oh, she was close already.

Ridiculously proud of the effect he had on the beautiful, ingenious Major Doctor Samantha Carter, Jack changed his hold on her and began to rub her. Her hips moved with him, albeit faltering. Her head lolled back onto his shoulder, her neck arching much in the same way her back did while her hips rolled.

It didn't take long until her body tensed against his, her muscles locking up before she let go and came apart in his arms, her whole body shaking with the shudders that overwhelmed her. Breathing heavily through the painful hold his arousal had on him, Jack tried to enjoy the sight of her letting completely go and while it was seriously exciting, Jack had no intention of ending it here already, so gritting his teeth he held on stubbornly, refusing to come in his pants from the sight of her alone.

He waited for her to return from her high, giving her a short breather, but as soon as she focused back on him, he let his fingers travel to the button and zipper of her pants, opening them slowly and deliberately so she had all the time and possibilities to decline him should she not want to go on.

She did no such thing, however. Her fingers gripping the hair at his neck loosened to caress his neck in a loving touch when she whispered with a still rough voice: "Jack…"

He all but snapped at that. Control finally left him. He pressed into her as much as possible while his hands worked uncoordinated at his own fly. His breath was reduced to short, irregular puffs but it matched her own erratic breathing.

He removed his leg from in between hers and immediately, her pants fell down to the ground. His hands went to her hips, latching onto her waist and she leaned forwards, splaying her hands against the glider's side to counter him. Rather hastily, Jack positioned himself and she parted her legs even further, a sigh of pure anticipation escaping her.

With one powerful thrust he was inside her once more and while she was still all tight and incredibly warm, Jack could feel her muscles relax to his intrusion way faster now. He didn't have to wait anymore and so he started moving immediately. His hands at her waist held her stable against him while he set a fast pace from the beginning. This time he wasn't trying to drag it out in any way, he was purely going for their fast release. He was targeting all her sensitive points spot-on and going by her hitched moans and little cries he was fairly successful.

Gritting his teeth, Jack tried to hold out but he was aware he was racing towards his own release faster than he liked.

"Sam…" he growled into her hair, pressing his head against hers.

Her hips began rolling, meeting his thrusts with movements of her own, nearly driving him crazy. He could feel her tighten around him in a telltale way, telling him she was nearing another orgasm soon. Together, they moved in practiced synchrony, their bodies meeting each other's with determination, force and passion. As always, the feelings mixing in were downright explosive, making this so much more than simple sex. It was all-encompassing, a complete joining, physically as well as emotionally.

Jack felt a tingle beginning to overtake his spine, travelling through his whole body until it all gathered within his lower regions. His muscles tensed up, making his moving hard and edgy. Abandoning all semblance of self-control he drove into her, not surprised anymore when she matched his pace confidently.

Groaning, Jack felt his release sweep him away the moment she screamed out, telling him she'd followed. The world went seriously shaky on Jack, the picture of Sam in front of him swaying with the occasional black dots appearing in his vision. His breath got stuck somewhere in his throat and while his chest still heaved routinely in an automatic attempt to bring in oxygen, he forgot to breathe while the incredible sensations raced through his whole body, leaving it tingling and trembling.

When Jack finally felt his surroundings check back in, he realized he had straightened up but one of his hands was thrown out, holding himself steady against the glider's cool, metal side. His other arm clutched Sam's shuddering and trembling form to his body, holding her upright where her bucking knees would have failed the job. Her head rested against his shoulder and when he turned his head he saw that her eyes were closed and her mouth was wide open, greedily sucking in much-needed air. Sweat rolled down her temples and made her back stick to his chest despite their clothes but he didn't mind.

She was obviously still trying to regain her senses, so Jack waited patiently. He rested his head against hers, his jaw leaning against her forehead. Her breath washed over his throat, tickling his sensitive, sweaty skin. Jack closed his eyes and reveled in the moment. He finally had the most perfect woman in his arms, the woman he had secretly loved for years without being able to do something, anything, about that. Whatever had happened, however much fate had fucked them over, right now Jack couldn't bring himself to regret a single thing if this was to be the outcome of it all.

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Jack watched her raptly. He couldn't help it. Whenever he tried to focus somewhere else, he could feel his eyes travel back to her only seconds later. He knew he was making her nervous but paradoxically this was what intrigued him the most right now. He saw her tense up again and then she pointedly turned, now working with her back towards him, but he could still see the violent blush spreading over her neck.

Jack could feel the wide, smug smirk he'd been carrying around for hours widen even more. She was feeling shy, and it was one of the cutest things he'd ever seen. For a moment Jack asked himself if he had perhaps gone a bit overboard when he'd gone down on her this morning but neither had she complained then nor had she thrown him out of the control room yet, so she couldn't mind too much, could she? Jack looked over to where she was currently working on one of the inactive control panels Jack had found out to be in control of a few systems concerning the Stargate now that he was banned from the hangar most of the time she tried working there. There was just something about her and the combination of huge honking spaceships just made him lose all rational mind and restraint, so yes, him, Carter and the hangar didn't work out that often anymore.

The short mental trip to the few of their… encounters within the hangar made the smile on his face turn even smugger if that was possible. They naturally were very memorable memories – which experience with Carter was not – but for Jack, this morning definitely scored a higher ranking within his most favorite memories with her. It didn't top his first night with her but he seriously feared no night ever would, because after all it had been _their first night_ _together_. Still, it would become one of his all-time favorites, he was fairly sure.

It wasn't uncommon anymore for them to have sex after waking up. In fact, Jack sometimes felt as if they were on an extended honeymoon. As if on vacation, they did whatever they wanted whenever they wanted and although they did work on the base almost every day, because neither of them could stand not having any task to do, they were in no hurry. Whether they started early in the morning or late in the afternoon and then worked way into the night was all up to them and they certainly made the most out of this opportunity. Jack waited for the time the first, exciting newness of their relationship would cool down, reducing the almost crushing _need_ to be with her, but apparently they were still far from reaching it sometime. So in spite of slowing down sometime, they were just exploring the new aspects of their relationship more and more. Then again, they had years to catch up on and this was certainly a healthier outlet for the stress of all the past weeks than the blind anger they had hidden behind before. It also had the nice side effect that Jack got Sam exhausted enough on a regular basis that her nightmares had stopped for now.

So in hindsight, with all the getting-to-know they were doing, Jack was seriously astonished that it had only this morning crossed his mind to use his mouth on her. It actually was something he liked doing to a woman because it somehow satisfied something very primal within him to watch while he worked a woman towards bliss. For him it was definitely painful beyond anything bearable because he usually refused himself the release. He only rarely did this to a woman but when he did then he focused his whole attention on her. It was one of his ways to show how much he loved and cherished this woman, so for once he didn't want to concentrate on his own pleasure. Jack had never had any doubt that Carter was to be one of the few women he would go down on if he was ever given the chance and again it had been even better than he had imagined.

Jack had been fairly confident she'd also liked it so he had been kinda stumped afterwards when she had been unable to look at him in the very silent breakfast/lunch that had followed. It had taken him a few attempts but towards the end of their meal, he had finally needled out of her that this had been something of a new experience for her. Apparently whatever former lovers she had had, they hadn't been much for oral, at least not on her. Jack inwardly pitied those men. In his opinion there wasn't much that was topping watching Carter completely lose control over herself because of his ministrations.

And so, while Sam was now entirely embarrassed and tried to work through what she considered something of a new experience even if technically speaking she had made this experience before just not to this level, Jack's male ego was soaring high, making him trail her all day with an overly smug smirk even though he was clearly aware he was making her uncomfortable. He knew she would probably want some peace and calm to go through everything in her head but he just couldn't leave her alone. His possessive streak had always been kinda rampant when it came to her but most of the time his rationality managed to control it quite well. But with their current situation? Jack had all hands full to not stalk the base like some self-satisfied lion. Really, he'd gotten sorta pathetic…

So, all his determination to give her space literally flushing down the drain, he had made up some excuse to work on another control panel in the control room just to be in her presence and observe her dreamily. Yep, he was now officially worse than he had been in his teenage years. But, in Jack's opinion, this was all Carter's fault.

"Um… Jack?" the object of his current gawking asked uncomfortably over her shoulder.

"Hmpf?" he grumbled unclearly, his head still lost in some clouds.

"Could you… um, finally stop with the stares?" she inquired.

"I'm not _staring_ ," he answered. Really, he thought of it more along the lines of 'admiring'.

"I mean it," she insisted. "Stop staring at me. _Please._ "

Even though she said it with pretty apparent annoyance, it only needed the word 'please' to make Jack's thoughts travel back to the morning and the shuddering, uninhibited voice with which she had called it out then. He growled almost inaudibly because of the memory and he could see her shudder in an involuntary response to his reaction. Again the urge to go over and bend her over the next control panel was threatening to overtake him but finally getting accustomed to the strong reactions he was constantly showing to her, he _was_ getting better at controlling them. Occasionally at least.

Still, Jack felt a feral grin spreading over his face once again and his heated gaze bored into her ramrod straight back. She fidgeted uneasily under his scrutinizing glance and seeing her body move made him want her even more. But right now he wasn't sure what she wanted so he stayed where he was. Whatever he might feel or desire, Jack would never do a thing she didn't want. He could see her hands fist at her sides and slowly, his gaze turned concerned. Was this more than her simply being shy around him? More than her being uncomfortable?

Slowly, Jack stood up from where he had been pretending to work and, stepping around the few panels separating them, he walked the few steps over to her. He came to stand behind her, closer than he probably should have. "Want me to leave?" he offered, now insecure if he hadn't managed to cross her limits this time. Maybe he really had gone too far this time.

"Yes," she blurted out, only to continue: "No! I mean…"

Jack raised his eyebrows confused. What the hell was going on?

Carefully and cautiously to stay on safe grounds, he laid a hand on her shoulder. "Sam? You okay?" he asked.

All of a sudden, and completely unexpected, something within the control panel in front of her exploded violently, sending sparks of electricity flying around them. Reacting by pure instinct, Jack hauled her back against him and retreated a few steps with her. Immediately, the security systems of the base activated and for the second time Jack and Sam got buried under the heavy spray of quench water raining down on them to extinct the starting fire within the control panel. Since this was the control room with inestimable and irreplaceable devices, the fire extinguishing systems were localized. Meaning, while Sam and Jack got thoroughly soaked once more because they were standing too close, all other remaining control panels close by remained dry and operative.

Jack clutched onto Sam, trying to reassure himself of her wellbeing by holding her close, and he felt her chest heave, her breathing having quickened by the surprise.

"I can repair that! I think…" she hurried to assure him but she sounded confused.

To hell with all repairs, Jack thought while raking his free hand through his growing hair that now hung dripping with water into his face. He was just glad nothing had happened to her.

"What the hell happened, fer cryin' out loud?" he wanted to know.

She winced. "That was me. Sorry."

He looked down onto her puzzled. "What do you mean that was you?"

Again he could see a monster blush spread from her cheeks all the way down her neck. "Um… I was kind of… overwhelmed. And tense. And I felt like the situation was getting unendurable… and then you came… and touched me… and I kind of… snapped. And then it exploded…" she explained.

Jack tried to understand what she was attempting to say but the fact that, for the first time ever, Major Samantha Carter, the most eloquent person he knew aside from Daniel, was stuttering around in his presence was kind of distracting.

Finally it registered with him what she was telling him. She had lost control. In her momentary, total confusion her powers had undermined her control, had lashed out wildly and gotten the panel before her to explode. Stumped Jack watched the smoldering remains of the control panel when the water lastly stopped. It was a dripping wet, pitiful ruin but he instantly knew Carter would have a ridiculous amount of fun restoring it.

Jack's thoughts travelled. In fact it didn't really surprise him her powers had gotten loose. He could totally understand that in her emotionally vulnerable state and her embarrassment she had failed getting them under control in time. Jack was more surprised by the fact that it hadn't happened before already. With what they had been doing these past days and the number of times he had gotten her to abandon all control, this should have happened much sooner. So why had it not? Had she still been enough in control because she had known what to expect from sleeping with him when he had somewhat taken her by surprise this morning by going down on her, shaking her up this good? Or had they simply been lucky?

Whatever it was, Jack knew they couldn't risk this to repeat itself. From firsthand experience he knew what strong powers Sam possessed and apparently, it was overdue she learned how to properly control them before one of them would get seriously injured. Even though they were SG-1, even their luck had to run out some day.

"Sam?" he asked quietly. She hummed a response, telling him she was listening.

"I think we should leave the control room be for the moment."

Confused, she turned within his arms, her big blue eyes looking up at him uncomprehending.

He sighed. "We need to work on your powers. You need to get them under control."

He could feel her tense against him and knew immediately that this was no task she was looking forward to. Still, Jack knew she was as aware as he himself that this was non-negotiable. It was something they needed to do.

* * *

 _A/N: Another difficult chapter for me but there was no going around it. There's no way Jack and Sam would be able to keep their hands off each other if they finally allowed themselves to be together._


	42. Accessing

_**Author's notes**_ _: Again, thank you all so much for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Two – Accessing_

Daniel Jackson sat slumped in front of his computer, his bleary eyes looking the e-mail account in front of him up and down. Teal'c was lucky to be able to claim he had no knowledge whatsoever of computers, he thought absentmindedly. Then again, Daniel himself had _volunteered_ for this task. Even if 'volunteer' wasn't exactly the most adequate word to describe it. He had pretty much refused anyone else did this task.

The e-mail account Daniel was currently scrolling through was Sam's. The rather hectic lockout the SGC had done upon Jack's and Sam's disappearance had ensured nobody could access their personal accounts anymore since all their codes had been thrown out of the systems. Which, in hindsight, had somehow backfired. As the 2IC of Cheyenne Mountain and the lead scientist, Jack and Sam had dealt with highly important projects and associates and without any possibility to access their personal computer accounts, from which most of the communication with these associates had originated, many projects had come to a sudden stop. Important documents they had stored within these accounts because of their confidential classification were needed but inaccessible. And the only way to get into these accounts without their personal identification codes was their personal password. Sam had actually installed the system to work like that to erase any and all possibility that a superior officer could enter the personal accounts of their subordinates so that any possibility of an invisible, cloaked or disguised alien infiltrator gaining access to the system was barred.

But the SGC needed these accounts opened, sooner rather than later, and so they had set their best scientists to the task of hacking into them. They had temporarily drawn McKay from his work on the security systems and with a team, he was now working on the Colonel's account, but Sam's had soon pretty much turned out inaccessible. Being the genius she was she had fortified her account against almost any imaginable outside access, making it nearly impenetrable. The only chance left to hack into her account was guessing her personal password and who knew Sam better than her own team? No one could possibly guess her password better than Daniel, Jack or Teal'c. Seeing that Jack was naturally unreachable for the moment and Teal'c _had_ claimed to have no knowledge of computers in any way, General Hammond had asked Daniel to try and break into her account. Daniel had agreed but under the condition that he was the one who would handle the account should he be successful. Needless to say that the higher brass hadn't been pleased at all but in the end they had no other choice than to give in to Daniel and Daniel had been more than unwilling to compromise on this. He wanted to ensure Sam's privacy. He had had no possibility to somehow get a hold on Jack's data, so he figured he should at least try and protect one of his friends' privacy.

It had taken Daniel days upon days and uncountable visits from Sergeant Siler who had to reset the system because Daniel had given in a wrong password too many times. Daniel knew that Sam kept several password-encoded files on her many computers and those were all rather easy passwords. But knowing her slightly overachieving and careful streaks, Daniel had no illusions that her master password would in no way be this easy to crack. But Daniel knew Sam and this gave him various advantages in his work. He at least had a starting point, where McKay's team had no means of going for Jack's password at all. As far as Daniel knew, the scientists were trying to brutally break into Jack's account, not bothering with the password at all, even if Daniel was quite confident he could get that cracked with time, too.

Going by the impression he had of Sam, Daniel had deduced that the password would be as secure as she would get it. Meaning, she would have probably used anything the system allowed: from capital letters to numbers to the maximum length. And she would have used something that would have to do with her work here in the SGC but would still be personal, connected to her and her alone. So Daniel would bet about anything that it had in some way to do with SG-1. But that still left him with almost uncountable possibilities and Daniel was aware he had no other choice than to try and work through every single one by hand.

It took him almost a week but he finally stumbled upon the right combination. It had been a specific mixture of their names and birth years and Daniel had tried unsuccessfully to not snicker at the way she had combined her own name with Jack's and tried to not get sentimental when he found her to have mixed his birth date with hers since they were closest in age.

So after a little over a week Daniel had triumphantly cracked the ingenious Major Carter's account while McKay was still getting frustrated with the Colonel's but hey, wasn't as if he was gloating with this fact in front of McKay. Not that often, at least.

And now Daniel had successfully managed to reduce himself to a secretary who was working through another person's e-mail account. He had retrieved whatever documents the higher brass needed for whatever project and had then set onto the task of digging through the worth of – Daniel shot a quick glance to his calendar – something around seventeen weeks of unanswered e-mails. Given, Jack and Sam were only missing for about fourteen weeks, having broken Jack's personal record of having been MIA for three months when he'd been stuck on Edora, but with Sam's abduction by Nirrti and her confinement afterwards, she hadn't been able to answer any e-mails for something roughly around four and a half months. Now Daniel had to sort through them and anything the SGC might need he forwarded to the respective area. Any associates who had contacted Sam for whatever urgent reason he e-mailed and told them she was currently unavailable. He kept from reading any personal e-mails she had received but still opened the ones she had gotten from the Air Force's Human Resources Department and the notary to whom he had sent her official documents concerning her last will and everything connected to that. Daniel just wanted to check if there had been a problem but most of these e-mails were simple notes that the messages had been received and were officially recognized and registered. Daniel was relieved. So in case anything would happen to her now, whether it was that she would be captured and brought back to Earth to be court-martialed or something would occur to her off-world, he and Jack had all possibilities to fight for her rights now.

Slowly Daniel went through her mails, working through the contents of weeks. Only now he really realized how much Sam's opinion was valued on anything concerning the Stargate. Apparently she worked closely together with several scientists and doctors all around the world, the Pentagon, Area 51 and even a few representatives from the Russian Program, aside from all the SG teams she was coaching and advising within the SGC. How Sam still found the time to get any sleep at all with all the questions and requests she was being bombarded with was seriously beyond Daniel. Really, the NID hadn't done the world a favor in driving her away.

Daniel yawned not-so-discreetly at his rather boring task when another e-mail from the Air Force's HR department stood out to him. The subject matter simply read 'update personal data' which didn't tell Daniel that much. Absently, he opened the mail while routinely reaching for his coffee mug. Daniel placed it to his lips while quickly skimming the mail's content, barely managing to hold back on a wince when he noticed his coffee had turned cold during the time he had spent holed up with Sam's mails today.

Suddenly, his eyes widened when he understood what the mail was telling him and he actually choked on his coffee. Like in a bad cartoon, Daniel spat it back out, spraying the monitor of his computer with sprinkles of coffee.

Coughing, Daniel tried to get rid of the coffee that had managed to get into the wrong pipe and with watering eyes, he tried to understand what had happened. How was the HR department coming to _this_ conclusion?!

Daniel wrecked his brain what could have happened until a suspicion began to filter in. Jumping up from his seat as if the chair was burning, Daniel began to plough through the folders littering his desk. For once not caring about their highly important contents or any semblance of order he still had on his desk, he threw whatever was in his way into some corner without a care.

"Hah!" he finally called out triumphantly when his hands clutched onto one of his own folders which he knew held copies of all documents he had sent out for Sam. He had initially wanted to give them to her for her own documents, but yeah, then she'd deserted…

Daniel quickly flipped through the documents, his eyes skimming over the headlines, until…

"Oh, no!" he groaned out loud. The HR department had been right! Damn it all to hell and back!

Daniel began gnawing on his lower lip. He had screwed up. Royally. He had sent the Air Force something that hadn't been intended for them. In fact, it hadn't even been intended for Sam to begin with. Actually, Daniel had been asked by his coworker, Doctor Winter, to get her this certain document and apparently he had put it into the wrong folder, thus giving it to the wrong person…

Staring at Sam's familiar signature at the bottom of the document and Jack's curvy handwriting next to hers Daniel was plagued by a decidedly bad conscience. Oh, this would bring down hell for his friends! And actually explained why Doctor Winter kept asking about the document.

Angered by his own carelessness, Daniel threw the folder into a drawer of his desk, roughly slamming it shut for good measure. Pacing through his lab, Daniel tried to figure out what he should do now. There was no way this would go unnoticed. If Sam had received such a mail, then Jack would have gotten a similar one, too. And the moment McKay and his team would gain access to his account, this would get out.

Stopping mid-movement, Daniel turned and shut down Sam's account. Without bothering to do the same with his computer, Daniel hurried out of his lab and practically sprinted down the hallway to the elevator. He had to warn General Hammond! Maybe the Major General could do something to prevent this mess to blow up spectacularly!

Daniel punched the call button for the elevator and stepping from one foot to the other, he waited anxiously. His thoughts raced, trying to figure out how messy it would get for his friends. Actually, by now it shouldn't even be a problem anymore. They had crossed what had become the magical three-months-mark. Since the almost impossible rescue mission for Jack when he'd been MIA on Edora, which Sam had made possible nevertheless in the end, this had turned into the trademark borderline for the SGC. Anyone who got lost during a mission was being searched and looked out for for this period of time before the teams would finally move on. Despite what official orders were from the high brass, all SG teams would keep their eyes open for their missing team member for this time interval and only upon crossing the three-month-mark they would lastly continue on. Another example of how Jack and Sam had molded the SGC's SOP's but Daniel was getting off topic.

Normally, after the three-month-mark General Hammond was forced to make some decision of whether he would continue to mark the person in question missing in action or declare them to be killed in action. Daniel knew Jack and Sam would not be declared killed in action because while they were currently lost to the SGC, they had fled, out of their own free will to boot, and were presumed to be alive and comparatively well. But Daniel was seriously astonished their status was not changed to 'deserted' or whatever the military equivalent of that would be. But he knew that General Hammond wanted them to remain active members of the military so they could return to their former posts if they would ever return and, much to anyone's astonishment, Kinsey also was all for keeping them reported MIA. In fact the Senator was one of the loudest when it came to the continuation of the search and rescue measures concerning Jack and Sam. Daniel had no idea why the Senator was so keen on getting them back but for now it was serving his goals as well so Daniel purposefully kept silent on that matter. No harm in having the loud-mouthed Senator on their side when it was helping him achieve his goals for once.

So while Daniel had been grateful that they were still seen as missing in action, he realized that this could now be what could get them into fair trouble should they ever return. Not that they wouldn't be in trouble anyways but this would most likely turn out to be the icing on the cake…

Daniel tried to ignore the painful stab he felt at his inward reference to cake which reminded him of Jack and how much time had passed since he'd last eaten with his friend in the commissary. Thankfully, his attention was diverted by the halting elevator. The doors had merely opened when Daniel stormed in, almost running over Sergeant Siler. Shooting the astonished man an apologetic smile, Daniel punched the button for Level 28. He needed to get the General briefed. Crossing his fingers in silent praying Daniel wished to all heavens that his stupidity had not spelled doom for his friends.

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Another not-so-silent curse made Jack perk up once more. Lowering the leg he had lifted for a high kick, he looked over to the adjoining training room Sam was in. It had been a week since they had agreed on working on her powers. She knew it was important and why, and while she wasn't exactly fond of her powers, she wanted to work on them. Problem was, she wasn't really getting the hang on them. Jack had watched her for a day or two until she had lost her patience with him and thrown him out of her trainings room, claiming she wanted to work on her own. Which even turned out a blessing. Ever since Sam had started working on her powers they seemed to become more present for her and she needed even more strength and self-control to suppress them. Bouts of exploding energy around her were becoming more and more frequent and by now Jack seriously had to watch out around her if he wanted to stay healthy. Until now Sam had gotten various lights to explode as well as the occasional device and while she had repaired all of it of course, her mood soured more and more with every imploding thing. Jack knew she was constantly haunted by a bad conscience whenever she lost control and this made her fragile hold on her powers even more slippery. While Jack's control of his abilities came somehow natural seeing that they originated from his own DNA, hers were foreign and strange to her body. Sam had a really hard time wrapping her mind around the fact that they were there and she hadn't found a way to control them yet.

By now it had gotten so bad, Jack had seen himself forced to put some distance between them. He was setting her off too much and right now she needed control badly. So Jack was reduced to the former distance between them. No sitting right next to her anymore, no touching her in any way anymore. Not even sleeping in the same tent with her anymore. Now Jack slept in the control room. Sam had offered to sleep there and leave him with the comfort of their tent but the thought alone of what could happen to her when she lost control in presence of all that important and electrically charged devices had been enough for Jack to refuse profoundly. And actually, it wasn't the fact that he had to sleep in the control room that was annoying him that much, it was the fact that he had to sleep there _alone_. Jack hated every night he couldn't sleep next to her with vigor. Really, it was surprising how fast he had gotten used to have her around all the time. And how much he was missing it now that he had to stay away from her again. Sam worked relentless because she wanted the former status quo back as well but she was making small advancements at best.

Jack was never far from her. Together they had scouted out the various training facilities the base had and had settled on a large one with fairly intact equipment that was far enough from the control room and all life support systems that Sam could wreck whatever she wanted. Early in the morning Sam would come here and train and only return beaten and drained somewhere in the night. Jack stayed close as long as he inconspicuously could, claiming he needed to train his abilities as well. He already had a fairly good hold on his newfound strength but he figured working on them couldn't hurt. Actually his strength wasn't that new to his body. He had been physically strong before, too, just not this much. His body had needed time to learn to calculate his new strength in the right way but then it was pretty much all the same as before.

But Sam's powers? Were in no way comparable to his. Sam's powers were something new, something her body and mind had no means of knowing beforehand. And they were also nothing she could literally get a grip on. They were energy, directed by her thoughts and feelings. They were nothing she could handle with her hands or legs like he could. The more she was feeling, the more her powers grew. And right now, with her insecurity running high, they were all over the place.

Jack stopped abruptly, his hand in the middle of a well-placed strike to the large… thing he used as a punching bag. He had no idea what the door-like device actually was but until now it had withstood all his strikes, no matter how much force he had put behind them, and so he was using it as a sparring partner.

Sam's powers were connected to her feelings! Of course. This was why they were running rampant. She lacked confidence in handling them and in turn her powers were lashing out uncontrolled. It was a vicious circle, strengthening itself more and more with each failure.

If she wouldn't gain some control sometime, she would never improve. Jack looked over to the other training room just when another small explosion rang out. He winced and automatically squished the urge to run over and check if she was alright. By now this was almost happening on a daily basis and he feared she would seriously explode if he would ask her only once more if she was alright.

Sam needed to gain some confidence in her abilities or they would get nowhere. Did she know? Jack was aware that she was the brains of the two of them and so she had probably reached this conclusion days before him. But knowing the solution and getting it to work were two different things. Just because she knew what she was supposed to do didn't mean she could actually do it.

Jack suspected that she would soon master her powers when she'd gotten behind a strategy in controlling them, because Carter was usually good at everything she started, she just hadn't managed to get a hang on it yet.

Gnawing on his lower lip absentmindedly in thought, Jack contemplated if he really couldn't help her. He knew she had practically thrown him out for the same reason why he was currently sleeping in another room: out of worry for his wellbeing. She was afraid she could hurt him again.

A thought bounced into Jack's head, an idea he'd gotten all of a sudden by something she had said to him once: that she was calming down in his presence. Maybe he could use that to help her. She needed stability and maybe he could provide that for her.

Determined, Jack walked over to her training room. He stepped through the wide open, rectangular hole in the wall, because as much as she wanted privacy he refused to close the door to her training room. He needed the connection or _he_ would go crazy if he had no idea of knowing what she was doing to herself within this room.

Jack entered and tried not to blink at the destruction in the room. Quite a few of the artificial lights embedded into the wall had exploded, their tiny pieces strewn around the room and whatever training equipment had been stashed within the room was bent or dented. At least the walls had survived without visible damage. Sam stood in the middle of the room, her shoulders and chest heaving with her heavy breathing. She was half-turned to him, so he could see the frustration dominating her face, as if her impossibly tense stance wouldn't have been a dead give-away yet.

"Jack?" she asked, wary and tired but obviously confused as well. She was used to him leaving her be while she was in here.

He nodded towards her. "So, how's it goin'?" he asked, while leisurely strolling over to her.

She snorted and motioned around the room. "How does it look like it's going?"

"Hard task, hm?" he said understandingly.

She sighed while raking her hand through her growing hair. Immediately, Jack was getting jealous. He wanted to run his hands through the mass of curls, too, but he had been denied this pleasure for too long already.

"You have no idea," she admitted.

"Hn," he said noncommittal. When he stepped closer to her, she cautiously moved back, insisting on the distance between them. Jack hated it.

"So no solution found yet?" he inquired, on the outside all calm and relaxed.

Sam blew out a breath exasperated. "I think I know how to get my powers under control, the thing is I just can't seem to get it to work!" she exclaimed frustrated, confirming his assumptions.

Jack slowly rounded her, listening to her explanation, and when he came to stand behind her, he moved in closer to her and laid his hands on her shoulders. She immediately tensed under his touch and somewhere in the back another lamp imploded with a shattering sound. Jack didn't bat an eye. He wasn't surprised by this reaction anymore.

He felt Sam attempt to turn around, probably to push him away and bring distance between them once more but he so wasn't about to let her do it.

"Eyes to the front, Major!" he barked in his best CO-voice.

Military training ensured Sam obeyed him before her mind had even processed what had happened. Her body turned back, almost snapping to attention at his order and her eyes went center, just as he had demanded.

He could feel confusion radiate from her, but she didn't say anything. She was waiting for what he was going to do next. Jack was relying on the fact that the military way gave her back the needed courage and confidence to finally get a hold of her powers, so he asked: "You're focusing on what you need. But what's the first thing we check?"

He was aware he was talking to her like he would talk to a fresh recruit who was still in training, but somehow it matched the situation, he thought. He knew she was aware too, when he saw her raise a perfectly shaped eyebrow in a very Teal'c-like manner.

"Major?" he prompted her when she failed to react in an appropriate time.

"Sir, the first thing we check is what we got with us to make do in the situation!" she replied hastily, snapping back into her military persona as well.

Jack could see her nibble on her lower lip uncertainly when she went back to addressing him with 'sir'. It wasn't the first time, seeing that whenever they went on raids they fell back into the military hierarchy since they were on a mission and during these times she would always call him 'sir', but on Laterra she rarely used this proper term anymore.

"Damn right," he confirmed and then bent slightly down so that his mouth was hovering over her ear. "So what do you've got, Major?"

She was confused, he could tell. By his question as much as by his sudden close proximity and Jack had to hold back an automatic chuckle at seeing her adorably puzzled expression.

"Sir, I don't understand…" she whispered bewildered.

"Come on, Carter," he reminded her. "You have experience. You have done this before."

"Sir, I wasn't exactly in control when Nirrti–"

"I'm not talking about Nirrti here," he interrupted her softly before she could end her sentence and then waited patiently until she came up with the right solution.

"The _chess knight_?" she asked baffled. "In Cassie's isolation room?"

"Exactly," he answered.

"But I have not the slightest idea how I–" she protested immediately.

Jack almost groaned. She was still thinking too much. He needed her to stop that. "Major, I don't care how you did it!" he snapped at her. "As a matter of fact, you did it and now I want you to do it again!"

She tensed, her mouth opening to object, but Jack wasn't about to let her get a word in.

"That's an order! Is that understood?" he growled, all hardass Colonel now.

"Yes, sir!" she confirmed the command habitually before she even had the time to understand. Exactly what he had wanted her to do.

But she was still insecure. He saw her hand tremble with the anticipation of some crash to happen when she lifted her arm, targeting one of the lighting's fragments lying a few feet away from them.

Jack stepped closer to her, pressing against her body from behind. "Come on, Sam. You can do it," he encouraged.

She exhaled shakily and slowly, his fingers began running up and down her shoulders in what he hoped was a reassuring way. She held her breath and tensely, they both waited for something to happen. Then, slowly, the fragment began to lift up from the ground, rising higher and higher into the air.

Jack placed a quick kiss to the top of her head. "See? You did it," he said.

She nodded but didn't avert her attention from the small splinter floating in front of them.

"Don't try to do anything else for now,", he advised. "Just concentrate on letting it float around. Familiarize yourself with the feeling and the strength you need for that so you will be able to repeat it."

Again, she didn't answer but he could see her do what he had suggested. Her eyes closed and while she slightly leaned back into his touch, her concentration stayed with her task, deliberately feeling what it took for her body to make the tiny piece somersault in the air.

Finally, Sam let her arm fall down and the fragment dropped from the air, falling onto the concrete ground with a barely audible _ping_.

Before Jack could react, Sam had turned to him, hope shining from her eyes for the first time in days. "Thank you," she simply said.

Jack smiled down at her. He had no doubts that now she would only need time to work it out with her powers. Carter was a genius, after all.

* * *

 _A/N: Unfortunately, I don't have much knowledge about the procedures and workings of the Air Force/US military so a few things might be made up again…_


	43. Changing

_**Author's notes**_ _: Once more, thank you all for reading, following, reviewing and leaving helpful comments!  
_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Three – Changing_

Daniel tugged at his tie uncomfortably but was careful to not loosen it too much. He had never been much of a fan of suit and tie but considering the situation he really had no other choice. Normally Sam would have helped him with tying his tie, because no matter how much he practiced he just never got it right, but since she wasn't there, Janet had taken over.

Then again, Daniel mused, compared to the military men standing with him in the SGC's parking lot, he had to be comfortable. General Hammond, as well as his current 2IC Colonel Reynolds and his assistant Colonel Dixon, who were both attempting to do the job Jack had done while still leading their own teams somehow, had to stand there in their complete Dress Blues, all looking the poster-perfect version of an Air Force officer. Slightly behind them, at Daniel's side, stood Dr. Bill Lee who was representing the science department of the SGC, a position that Sam had formerly held. The good Doctor looked nervous as hell and quite uncomfortable to stand where he did, in between all these military men, even though he was working with them on a regular basis. A little ways away behind them stood a small battalion of SF's, all of them heavily armed and their weapons' securities switched off. Silently, they all waited and with inconspicuous glances Daniel tracked the passing time on his military wristwatch underneath his best suit's sleeve. Almost there…

He had barely finished the thought when the parking lot's gates opened, the heavy steel blast doors sliding smoothly to the side, and a convoy of cars entered. The black, fire- and bulletproof limousines with the flag of the United States flapping at the front of the cars in the slight gusts of wind halted in the middle of the parking lot, blocking all ways and immediately Secret Service agents swarmed out. Already expecting that, Daniel waited until they had secured the perimeters and checked that neither he, nor any of the waiting men was an imminent danger. When they stepped up to General Hammond, the SF's behind him shuffled uncomfortably but upon the General's soft order, they all stood back, watching but not moving.

When the agents were finally done, the car's doors opened and allowed their passengers to leave. The first ones Daniel even recognized. Agent Barrett got out of the car in the back, while Senator Kinsey stepped from the one in the middle. Kinsey waited where he had exited but Barrett came over to stand with Daniel. Daniel actually liked the other man, even though he knew Jack and Sam had been cautious with him. But so far Daniel could not say anything negative about the agent. Barrett was simply doing his job and he was as considerate and thoughtful as he could be as a NID agent. So far, Daniel had had to sit through a fair share of interrogations with him and Barrett had always been friendly and professional. Even more, the man had a pleasant sense of humor and an intelligence rarely seen with the NID.

Daniel nodded at the Special Agent, who smiled in return, and then turned back for the car in the middle where another man got off just now. Daniel studied the stranger thoroughly but inconspicuously. He was about General Hammond's height, had graying hair and was wearing an undoubtedly expensive, custom-made suit. But what Daniel noticed most about the man were his sharp eyes that travelled over the assembled men, assessing each and every one of them with short but methodical glances.

With Senator Kinsey speed-talking at him, the man walked over with resolute steps, bee-lining for General Hammond. Daniel noticed a warm smile cross the General's face when the man held out his hand immediately and they shook hands like old friends.

"George," the man said with a voice that certainly attracted and held attention. "Or rather Major General Hammond now, is it? God, the last time I've seen you we've both been Lieutenants."

"Mr. President," General Hammond acknowledged him with an amused smile. "That certainly was a lot of hair ago. At least on my side. But it's nice to see you again, as well."

"Mr. President," the man sighed. "That will take some getting used to."

Daniel curiously examined the new President of the United States while he talked to General Hammond. A week prior the current president had suddenly announced his resignation due to health issues. Daniel had no idea if he should believe the story of the health issues because the retirement came rather out of the blue, but all he really cared about was that there was going to be a change in lead. Anxiously Daniel had followed all reports in the media to see how the situation was turning out seeing that the former Vice President had also just taken his hat a few months prior which was making the whole situation even fishier. Now, freshly appointed Vice President Henry Hayes had made the fastest ascension through the ranks in the history of the United States. After not even three months in his post, he had been promoted to become the new President of the United States.

And apparently the President knew General Hammond. Daniel had no idea how or why, but he didn't really care, either. Hopefully, this would make the President see the Stargate Program in a better light than Senator Kinsey had made it out to be going by the grim but haughty expression on the good Senator's face.

"So…" President Hayes said into Daniel's thoughts. "Care to show me your top-secret base I have heard so much about but didn't have the time to visit in my three months of being Vice President?"

"Of course, sir," General Hammond said to his new Commander-in-chief.

"Um, Mr. President, maybe we should get right away to the crisis that is momentarily–", Kinsey began, but Hayes waved him off.

"Senator, the crisis was the first thing I heard of after all the secret briefings a President is _lucky_ to get and since then is the only thing I am hearing of. But from my understanding it's been a few months already and I don't see why this can't wait a few more hours while I visit the most secret building the United States have," the President said determinedly.

Daniel snickered silently. He liked the no-nonsense, practical approach the President seemed to have about him.

"If you would follow me, Mr. President?" General Hammond suggested. "I'd like to introduce you to a few people."

Hayes nodded and walking at General Hammond's side, he came over to where the SGC's delegation stood, waiting patiently. A whole bunch of Secret Service agents followed them but Daniel kept his attention on the man approaching them.

"Colonels Albert Reynolds and David Dixon, my current Second-in-Commands," General Hammond introduced the two battle-hardened men who snapped to attention immediately.

"Gentlemen," Hayes smiled at them amicably and nearly giving his personal guard a heart attack, he stepped forward to shake the men's hands. If Reynolds and Dixon were baffled by this behavior, then neither of them gave it away. Only the second they needed to reach out and grip the proffered hand was telling of their perplexity.

Then General Hammond and President Hayes moved on, Kinsey trailing after them in their shadows. General Hammond halted in front of Daniel but motioned towards Lee first. "Doctor Bill Lee, current head of our scientific department," he introduced and after the President had shaken the completely overtaxed Doctor's hand, they continued on.

"Doctor Daniel Jackson, head of the archaeological and linguistic department," the General announced. "And part of our flagship team, SG-1."

Slightly confused that General Hammond still proclaimed SG-1 to be existent, Daniel reached out to shake the President's hand. Hayes had a surprisingly firm handshake, the archaeologist noticed. Jack had always declared that you could identify a true, honest, strong-willed man by their firm handshake. And then Sam had often laughed at him, teasing him about what it would mean when he would receive such a handshake from a woman.

"It's an honor, Doctor Jackson," Hayes said with a congenial sparkle in his eyes.

"Oh no, the pleasure is all mine," Daniel answered routinely.

"I hope we can find the time so I can hear a few of these unbelievable stories about the Stargate and SG-1 I've been told by Kinsey firsthand from you…?" the President suggested but Daniel had the fleeting suspicion that 'no' was not an answer this man was accepting without a fight. And with him having become the President of one of the mightiest countries Earth had, it was practically ensured he wouldn't hear the answer very often.

"Sure," Daniel agreed. Maybe this was his chance, he realized. Who else was better suited than the President himself to reverse standing orders? Maybe this was the chance Daniel had been waiting for to finally clean Jack's and Sam's reputations and guarantee them a way to return to Earth…

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General Hammond watched the President softly close his office's door in the face of the Secret Service agents that had accompanied him into the SGC. Because of the needed clearance it hadn't been as much as he had arrived with but it had still been enough to make any ride within the elevator a cramped experience.

Sighing, Henry Hayes turned back to him. "So, George, maybe we can now speak a few words in peace," he announced with a relaxed smile.

General Hammond chuckled and indicated towards his desk for them to sit down. Despite the time they hadn't seen each other, Henry Hayes hadn't changed that much. He was still the straight-forward, honest-to-the-core man General Hammond remembered him to be.

General Hammond moved over to the desk and briefly thought of offering his own leather chair to his new commander-in-chief but the withering glare Hayes sent him made him rethink the suggestion. So sitting down in his own chair, General Hammond watched the President sit down in one of the chairs his subordinates usually sat in.

"You know why I've come here, George?" Hayes inquired while his eyes took in the various medals and rewards the General had received that hung on the walls of his office.

"Well, for sure not for a tour or a little chat with Doctor Jackson," General Hammond said smiling. "So I assume Kinsey got you updated on our current situation?"

Henry Hayes snorted dryly. "He sure has. The man is almost obsessed with this Program."

Hayes laid his fingers together in front of his chest so that they formed a triangle. "And while I usually tend to disagree with Bob, I can't help feeling he has a point this time," he continued.

General Hammond waited patiently. Surely, if the President was of the opinion this Program had served its purpose, was a threat to national security or simply was nothing but a waste of time and money, then they wouldn't sit here. Then General Hammond would already be sitting with his granddaughters in his living room in his well-deserved retirement and all other personnel would have gotten reassigned.

"But you know how I think about second-hand information," Hayes went on. "I don't like it. I usually go for the direct source. Because any and all second-hand information is subjectively influenced."

"So you want another opinion?" General Hammond guessed.

Hayes shook his head. "I want your _assessment_ of the situation. You're on the front lines and you've worked with those officers. You can tell me things no file could."

General Hammond sighed. "I'm not sure you will like what I can tell you."

Hayes smiled, a true, honest smile. "George, if I would have trouble with the unpleasant, then I shouldn't have become president. In fact I expect you to try and convince me."

"Of course you do," General Hammond answered, fully expecting this answer as well.

"Those officers missing in action served under your command," Hayes went on. "And from what I heard, you were fighting tooth and nail for them to remain MIA."

"I only did what was best in the interest of all involved," General Hammond stated confidently.

"See?" Hayes grinned. "And this is the exact assessment I want to hear of."

General Hammond leaned forwards and placed his forearms onto his heavy wooden desk that stood between them. "Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter are two of the best officers the SGC has ever had," he stated boldly. "They have done much for the Program. You've heard the stories about SG-1 and you surely have read at least a few mission reports, so I'm confident you know what I'm talking about. I know their disappearance was causing quite the uproar, but what can I say? I can fully understand their decision."

Hayes inclined his head, thinking. "I've heard a bit of the situation," he admitted but then asked: "Tell me about them?"

General Hammond looked at him, slightly confused. "Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter?" he questioned. "I'm sure you have been briefed on their files already?"

"As I said, you can probably tell me things their files cannot."

General Hammond was silent for a few heartbeats before he began: "Colonel O'Neill was this base's 2IC and the leader of SG-1. He is Special Forces and ex-black ops, and is a very experienced officer. I know most tend to describe him as difficult but all I can say is that he is one of the most honest and loyal officers I have ever had the honors to serve with. He is trustworthy, reliable and fully devoted to his job."

The General inhaled before continuing: "As for Major Carter, she is probably the most intelligent person I have ever met. Her military file is flawless and she has risen steadily through the ranks. Almost everything concerning the Stargate Program is to be ascribed to her work. The controlling computers, our safety programs and defenses, our technological progress, all can be traced back to Major Carter. She is an outstanding officer."

President Hayes nodded but waited patiently, as if to see whether or not General Hammond still had to add something. So, taking this chance, the General stated boldly: "And I don't see the threat in them the NID is making them out to be."

Hayes nodded thoughtful. "Why not?" he honestly wanted to know.

"They fled of their own volition. They had no intention at all to endanger the SGC or Earth. Hell, they have worked restlessly for years to ensure peace and safety for Earth. Bringing our planet into danger is the last thing they would do," the General explained.

"They could get captured," Hayes remarked.

"This is a possibility," General Hammond admitted. "But I think various reasons speak against it."

"Such as?" Hayes prompted.

"First of all, their experience," General Hammond elaborated. "Nobody has as much off-world experience as SG-1, so Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill know their way around the Stargate network. They would know which planets and races to avoid. Second, their knowledge. They know how to hide and disappear. Our own men failed for months to localize them, so why should the Goa'uld fare any better given that they don't even know they are hiding off-world? And they're military which gives them thorough survival training. They will do fine and escape whoever will try to capture them. Third, their abilities. Apart from their military training, they now have extended powers that will make them powerful foes, making any capture even more unlikely. And lastly, the silence. If some enemy had managed to get a hold of them by now, they would have come knocking on our Stargate already."

Hayes nodded, as if he had had the same thoughts before. "Their abilities…" the President went on. "They were one of the most… discussed points about these officers."

General Hammond snorted. "I can imagine," he said grimly. "Don't try to fool me, Mr. President, I fully know why the NID and people like Senator Kinsey want them captured and brought back: to make guinea pigs out of them. Which is the reason why they initially fled."

Hayes inclined his head. "That's a possibility," he said diplomatically but General Hammond could read in his eyes that he agreed. "Which makes me wonder why you support O'Neill's and Carter's return. Why not leave them where they are? In safety?" Hayes inquired.

General Hammond's eyes turned positively steely. To him it didn't matter that, right now, he was talking to the President of the United States. This here concerned officers under his command and for them, General Hammond was willing to go through fire. He was the one commanding them and he was the one responsible for them. A responsibility General Hammond had always taken serious.

"With all due respect, Mr. President, for one, we don't leave people behind here at the SGC!" the General stated. "Secondly, I think they would both _want_ to return. Neither of these officers would have deserted in the first place if they had seen any other possibility. They're both some of the most dutiful officers I ever had the honor to get to know. And lastly, because I think they would be powerful allies I would rather have on our side."

Hayes nodded, mulling the information General Hammond had given him over in his head. "And you think they would just return and continue to fight on our side?"

"Yes," General Hammond confirmed. "As I said, they are both very outstanding officers and they live for their job. Almost everything we have achieved in the years of running the Stargate Program is somehow connected to SG-1's efforts. They established alliances with powerful races that now stand at our side, such as the Tok'ra and the Asgard, but I fear those alliances will crumble without SG-1 as our connecting link to those races. Also we owe our current technological status to their negotiations. The X-Project for example would never exist without SG-1's accomplishments."

"Sounds like a real loss to us that those officers have deserted," Hayes mentioned offhandedly.

"It is," General Hammond answered, trying to not visibly bristle at the word 'deserted'. The General knew that this was the adequate term but he still couldn't see it like that. Neither Colonel O'Neill nor Major Carter would have ever deserted. They had fled because they hadn't seen an alternative to ensure their freedom, but for General Hammond desertion included an unwillingness to continue fighting for your country and follow the given orders. And neither of those things was applying to his officers. Colonel O'Neill as well as Major Carter would have loved staying in the Air Force, of that the General was sure. They would have continued fighting for their country and planet if they had been given the chance. In fact General Hammond had always seen them defending Earth to their last breath. And he was pretty sure they would still do that, even off-world.

"You know I can't just grant them pardon for their actions _if_ they ever decide to return. But I understand that that is pretty impossible anyways, right?" Hayes continued, still all objective.

"It is, until the sanctions against them are made void," General Hammond agreed.

"Still, they have no valid iris code and no GDO with them, so they can't return, can they?" Hayes inquired.

"Yes," General Hammond nodded. "But if they were released of the accusations standing against them, then my men could at least bring them back to Earth if they would stumble upon them off-world. With the situation right now I rather have to order my officers to shoot them upon sight because they are considered a national and planetary threat."

Hayes nodded his understanding. "As far as I am informed, the NID has ended its interrogation on the case?" he then asked.

"Yes. Agent Barrett told me as much earlier," General Hammond agreed.

"I will need to read the report and then I can see what to do about the situation," Hayes announced.

"I haven't had the time to read the report myself," General Hammond admitted.

"Alright, then how about we–" President Hayes began but he was interrupted before he could finish the sentence.

All around them alarms began to blare out. Puzzled, the President looked around.

" _Unscheduled off-world activation!_ " Chief Master Sergeant Harriman's voice rang out through the base's PA system.

Instantly, General Hammond was on his feet. He knew from all last updates that no team off-world was in a dire enough situation to need to come back before the scheduled return, so whatever it was, it had to be an emergency. With a quick excuse towards the President, the General ripped open his office's door and hurried to where he would be needed, hearing Hayes argue with his personal guard in the background. Of course the President would want to come and see for himself what was happening but apparently his bodyguards wouldn't let him. General Hammond didn't stay to wait for them to discuss it out. He hurried through the briefing room and then down the stairs to the control room. Sergeant Harriman was already waiting for him and his orders.

"What do we got?" General Hammond inquired the moment he had reached the control room.

"No identification code until now," the Sergeant reported back.

General Hammond nodded. "Then close the iris!" he ordered.

Harriman did as he was told and with a familiar scraping sound the iris began to appear over the engaged wormhole. Just then a jolt of energy emerged from the event horizon, dancing over the iris and the Stargate. The blue energy bounced around the Stargate for a second and the iris actually stopped its extending.

Confused, General Hammond and Sergeant Harriman stared forward at the now unmoving iris. The large titanium shield had barely gotten out and was now stuck, going by the warning flashing on the controlling monitors in front of them.

"Um… we have an error, sir!" Harriman reported.

"Fix that!" General Hammond ordered while simultaneously reaching out for the intercom and ordering the security teams in. SF's stormed the 'Gate room to take position in front of the engaged wormhole, weapons at the ready.

Sergeant Harriman worked with flying fingers but from what the General could see, nothing was changing. The warnings were still flashing, the alarms still ringing and the iris still not moving.

Shit! The General had a bad feeling about this.

Suddenly a tiny, round object flew through the event horizon and landed on the ramp, harmlessly rolling down and then over the concrete ground to stop in front of the SF's feet. General Hammond merely had the time to see the flashing lights on the round piece and understand what it really was, when the bomb already detonated in the 'Gate room with an overwhelming destructive energy. The energy felled all the men in the 'Gate room, neatly broke through the blast doors and managed to shatter the bulletproof glass of the control room's window. General Hammond had no time to react when a massive surge of energy swept through the room, bowling over whatever came into its way. The General was thrown backwards, swept off his feet, and flew through the room until his back connected painfully with the staircase leading up to the briefing room.

The General slumped to the ground in a heap and it took him a moment until his mind connected back to the reality. His ears were ringing and his eyes had distinct trouble to focus on anything. Everything was swaying in his vision.

Using the staircase as a help, the General pulled himself to his feet, swaying when the world began spinning viciously around him. Disorientated, the General looked around, trying to make out what had happened.

They had been attacked…!

General Hammond let his eyes travel around the room and realized he was the only one still standing. Harriman had collapsed forward in his chair, bleeding onto the controlling computers and the SF's standing watch at the room's doors had fallen, unconscious at best. Two technicians that had been in the room lay unmoving on the cold floor, one of them bleeding from his ears, which was not a good sign in the General's experience.

Staggering forward, General Hammond walked toward where Harriman sat. He wanted to reach out and check the other man's vitals when his eyes fell down onto the 'Gate room. General Hammond stopped in pure shock at what he was presented with. Jaffa swarmed the 'Gate room, spilling out of the engaged wormhole faster than the General could count them!

Oh god, they weren't just under attack, he realized, the Goa'uld were trying to completely take over!

General Hammond jumped forward with the surge of adrenaline rushing through his body and he punched several orders into the controlling computers. All alarms around the base began to double, announcing the situation to all officers present. At the same time he set several security programs into motion. The base closed off completely from the outside world, heavy blast doors ensuring nobody and nothing got in or out of Cheyenne Mountain anymore. All direly necessary support systems would disappear behind similar blast doors to ensure the base could still function the intended way and all systems were changing to recycling mode, meaning that, to ensure there was no connection whatsoever to the outside anymore, water and air would get purified and reused rather than brought in from the outside anymore. The General also cut off several delicate levels like the infirmary and Level 19 from access, shutting them away behind heavy blast doors to ensure the safety of the injured and the untrained scientists and prevent any access to the valuable and/or destructive pieces and scientific projects Level 19 hosted. With more time, General Hammond would have evacuated the base but right now he could only hope all civilians were going to follow his officer's orders if they wanted to survive. He knew the alarms would prompt all available security teams would come down here, but he feared they would be too late. By the time they had made their way through the base, they would be overrun by Jaffa.

General Hammond thought briefly about activating the self-destruct but despite being the Commander of this base, he still needed another superior officer's code for that. Only two officers at the same time could set the base's self-destruct. And right now, he was all alone in the 'Gate room.

Worse, they even had the President within Cheyenne Mountain right now! Paling at this thought, General Hammond snapped into action. He needed to ensure that his commander-in-chief was getting out of this alive!

General Hammond rushed over to one of the fallen SF's and took his P90. Sprinting, he raced for the stairs to the briefing room when he heard the first Jaffa run into the control room, their heavy footsteps giving them away. With staff weapon fire erupting all around him, the General reached the briefing room and stormed over to where his office was, his only intention to shield the most powerful man within the United States who had chosen the worst time for a visit the General could think of, all the while knowing that, with this certain superiority against them, they simply had no chance to withstand.


	44. Training

_**Author's notes**_ _: As usual, thank you all so much for following, reading and reviewing!_

 _Again a heads-up: this chapter contains explicit content. If you do not wish to read that, you can skip the chapter without missing anything vital for the story._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Four – Training_

Jack saw Sam strike out and twisted out of her reach in time. Her fist soared past his torso but the energy she had put into the hit still managed to get him, ripping his shirt open over his chest. Jack flinched when he felt a slow trickle of blood drip from the cut she had inflicted but his healing powers were at it immediately. He knew that the small wound would soon be completely gone.

Sam staggered past him when he had managed to deflect her blow and Jack used his advantage, aiming with the edge of his hand for her neck. He knew he would have to put quite the strength into the hit and so he didn't hold back at all. As expected, his hand didn't even reach her. It bounced off the invisible barrier she had erected around her with her powers, but his strength driving against the barrier unrelenting still ensured she fell to the ground with quite some force. She landed with an audible _umph_ escaping her but she turned instantly and doing a backflip over her head, she came back onto her feet.

Jack followed her steadily, waiting for her next attack. Ever since Sam had gotten the hang of her powers, they were training several times a day with each other. Upon her first success with the light fragment she had trained for days until she had finally felt confident enough in her abilities and from then on she had made huge progress with every passing day. It hadn't taken her long and she could let almost everything around her fly, from her flashlight to her sheathed combat knife to Jack's toothbrush. She had begun to drag their tent's zipper open with her thoughts, to pull her blanket aside with her powers or to float her coffee mug over when she felt too lazy to get up and get it herself. She had stubbornly used any possibility she got to train until she felt she could target more difficult projects. Then she had started focusing on more objects at once but Jack's personal highlight had been watching her take apart and reassembling her Berretta in the air without even touching it once. Soon she had begun experimenting with her powers and no matter what she had tried, in contrast to her constant failure at the beginning, she now succeeded with everything she set her mind onto. And not long after that, they had begun to train with each other. They had soon discovered that they were the perfect opponents for each other. Sam's psychic powers made her a difficult challenge for Jack's superhuman strength and his healing abilities ensured she couldn't accidentally injure him seriously.

By now they were getting quite rough with each other, not holding anything back anymore. They were testing their strengths, trying to see where their limits were. So far neither of them had ever truly won one of these contests but with each one they achieved a better hold on their powers and gained more control. And they found out various ways to use their newfound powers. By now Sam could use her psychic powers like a flexible shield, which had ensured Jack hadn't manage to touch her once in their last three fights. But his unnatural strength could still send her flying despite her protection. Just as he'd done right now.

Jack stalked after her, walking towards her with purposeful strides while his eyes never left her. She settled into a defensive stance and then thrust out an arm, her flat palm pointing at him, even though he was still a few feet away from her. Jack felt like running into an invisible wall head-on. Groaning, he came to a forced stop and reached up to rub his aching head.

"Carter!" he complained.

She rose from her crouched position, her arm still stretched out towards him. "What?" she smiled innocently. "Can't break through? I thought you were supposed to have superhuman strength?"

He narrowed burning eyes on her, his lids lowering. His stance was still all confident and he was all too aware of the strength humming in his body with the adrenaline the fight was keeping rushing through his body.

"You're playing with fire," he announced.

"Strange," she replied, taunting. "All I can see is a tiny spark."

Oh, this was it! She was so getting it from him!

With a sudden burst of strength that made his muscles bunch out, Jack burst forwards, breaking through her barrier, and rushed for her. She obviously hadn't expected him to get rid of her barricade this fast, but she adjusted quickly. He reached for her but she twisted out of his way. She circled him and turning hurriedly, Jack managed just in time to deflect her leg. He caught her ankle and hauled her towards him, getting her off-balance. She fell and he made no move to catch her this time. This exact scenario had ended with him on the floor with a bleeding nose the last time.

Sam thrust out her hands and caught herself with her powers just before she would painfully impact on the ground before pushing herself up to get back to her feet. Really, Jack thought while observing, she was getting quite acrobatic.

Jack didn't wait for her to ready herself but moved in immediately, intending to kick out her legs from under her. She saw him coming though and used her powers to push him further back. Grunting, Jack slid over the ground until the tensing muscles in his legs managed to stop him. When he looked up he saw her wait for him, panting. Her cheeks were flushed from the adrenaline and the fun she was experiencing from their training fights and her grown blonde curls were bouncing lightly around her bright face with her movement. Jack marveled at her sight for a second. She looked the epitome of beauty and strength. The fact that she could hand him his ass on a silver platter would probably scare off most men, but to Jack it had an exciting thrill.

Suddenly, she rushed at him and the moment she was getting uncomfortably close to him, he dashed forwards to meet her half-way. Her eyes widened with his unexpected move and Jack used her distraction to pull her into a textbook-perfect throw. Hauling her over his shoulder, he threw her down onto the ground. He could see the exact moment she caught on and managed to catch her fall with her powers, softening the impact. He knew from experience she would need a moment to recover from the amount of energy she had just used and lowered himself down onto her to hold her limbs in a relentless, firm grip. He wasn't holding anything of his massive weight off of her and he could hear her gasp underneath him, his heavy body pressing the air from her lungs. He shifted slightly so that his face hovered right above hers and smirking down on her, he asked: "Give up?"

She looked up at him, her blue eyes blazing. "I haven't even started!" she declared.

"Oh?" he said. "I don't see you moving any time soon."

She gritted her teeth and began twisting underneath him, testing the unyielding hold he had on her. Jack smiled even wider when he felt her body slide along his, her chest pressing against his when she tried to counteract his strength, and her thighs and hips bending unsuccessful, rubbing against his own. Just to spite her, he pressed down on her further, leaving her struggling for breath.

"Don't know about you, Carter," he drawled. "But I'm rather enjoying our position…"

She looked at him, annoyance flashing in her eyes. Hm, he'd managed to make her get serious. Sweet.

So he wasn't surprised when he felt a blast of energy push against him, lifting him off of her body. She managed to roll out from under him before she had to release him, but he could clearly see the strain it had taken on her. She had had to use a large amount of energy to pull off this stunt and now she was getting exhausted. He saw her wipe away some sweat from her forehead.

Still, she lashed out at him with her leg from her kneeling position with all the precision the military had taught her. Jack jumped out of her reach and simultaneously with her he got back to his feet. Without stopping to catch their breaths, they engaged in close combat, their bodies throwing whatever they had at each other. Her arms were striking out at him with rapid hits, but he countered each one routinely before he stepped in and began a series of quickly following punches. She deflected them with her forearms while shielding herself from his superior strength with her own powers. They were advancing and retreating as if they were dancing with each other. They curved and twisted, the other always following them like a shadow. Jack saw her hair fly around her head like a halo and with graceful movements her body escaped every attempt he made to capture her. She reacted with fast reflexes to each move he could think of and the challenge she was posing was making this as exciting for him as possible. Despite having years of experience ahead of her, she was always adapting fast within their fights and got quite creative, making him seriously _work_. Jack was used to be able to fell his opponents with a few single hits. He was _trained_ to do it like that because time and stealth normally was essential in black ops, and the fact that most of his opponents tended to underestimate him because of his laid-back attitude ensured that he usually really only needed a few hits. No such luck with Carter, though. She knew him better than anyone else and by now began to anticipate what he was going to do next, so with her he had to pull up anything he had ever learned. And Jack simply _loved_ how she challenged him. The fact that she could stand up to him and was not at all holding back in doing so was getting his blood to boil with excitement.

So their fast moves and close combat strikes continued unrelenting until Sam was a second too late and Jack finally got a hold of her. Using his strength, he pulled her against him, pressing her against his chest. She struggled and Jack enjoyed the feeling of her body moving against his. It had been so long since they had been together and he missed her like crazy! Unlike the first time when they had been unable to leave their hands off of each other, she now stayed as far away from him as she could, even though Jack was more than ready to give a shit about his health if he could only touch her once more in any way! He was seriously Carter-deprived…!

Jack couldn't resist the temptation and leaned down to kiss her neck. Sam gasped audibly and was thrown off for a second.

"Jack!" she reproached. "Focus!"

"Oh, I am," he mumbled against her ear.

She sighed exasperated and again, he felt her energy gather. He held onto her stubbornly, refusing to get pushed away. Frustrated, she lashed out and he felt her fist bury into his stomach, close to his solar plexus. Grunting in pain, he retreated, bringing space between them until he could get himself healed.

"No fair!" he complained.

"No fair?" she repeated baffled. "Who was the one who fought dirty?"

"Well, what do you expect from me?" he defended himself. "I haven't gotten to touch you at all in the past weeks! I'm only human, so of course I would use this opportunity!"

He saw her blush and the overpowering urge to just storm over and kiss her senseless was clawing at his mind. He wanted, no he _needed_ her so desperately!

"Come on, Carter!" he whined. "Can't we at least move back in together?"

She gazed at him confused until she understood what he was getting at. Jack waited impatiently, silently trying to will her to assent. He really had enough of having to sleep in the control room. He wanted back in to their tent and he wanted to be lulled into sleep by her even breathing again rather than having to lie fully awake in the too silent control room while wondering how she was currently doing.

"Jack, I'm not sure…" she began.

"Why not?" he grouched. "If anything our training sessions should have established that I can hold myself to your powers!"

"While being asleep?" she countered. "I have no idea what I could do to you, then!"

He looked at her incredulous. "Carter!" he cried out frustrated. "If you haven't killed me off by now, I doubt you'd do it now that you've gained control over your abilities!"

"I just want to make sure–" she tried to explain but again he interrupted.

"And I am fed up! I'm not going to do this any longer!" he sulked.

"Jack, try to understand–"

"Oh for cryin' out loud, Carter!" he snapped. In his anger, he stomped over, indistinctly realizing she was preparing for the next round in their fight when she had assessed his mood. He reached out to grab her but she thwarted his hand with a harsh hit that actually made her hand connect with his while retreating. He tried it once more and again she deflected him effortlessly.

"We are together, aren't we? So why do I have to sleep in another room?" he complained. He finally had enough! She was stable by now and he couldn't stand that the most contact he got from her was her hand connecting with some body part of him during their sparring!

She halted, her eyes widening surprised. "We're together?" she asked incredulous.

Jack almost saw red at that. He lashed out uncontrolled but she avoided him getting near to her by twisting to the side. He stomped after her, steadfast moving her towards one of the walls, cutting off her escape route.

"What do you think we were doing all this time?!" he growled, his eyes zeroing in on her dangerously.

"Um…" she murmured insecure.

Jack swore if she would say something along the lines of 'having sex' or 'fooling around' he would blow up! The urge to destroy something, anything, was beginning to make its way through his body, taking root in his muscles that trembled from the strain he was putting them under to remain in control somehow.

"I just didn't want to assume…!" Sam tried explaining.

Now Jack struck out but she avoided the blow and he smashed his fist into the wall behind her. She ducked around him while a firework of pain exploded in his hand. _Stupid, Jack, stupid_ , he berated himself inwardly while he waited for his healing abilities to make the pain subside.

From behind him, he could hear her astonished voice ask: "So we're together?"

He turned to her, rubbing his hurting hand with his uninjured. At least the pain managed to drive back the unjustified anger he was feeling.

" _Of course_ we are!" he snapped at her, before realizing belatedly that this was actually the most unromantic declaration he had ever made to a woman. Sam really deserved something better!

But before he could amend it in any way, she jumped him.

Completely taken by surprise, Jack somehow managed to catch her when she flew at him, her hands pulling herself up at his shoulders while her legs went around his hips to latch onto him, but he lost his footing. Falling backwards, Jack crashed into the wall behind him and moaning in pain from the encounter his head had with the unyielding stone, he slid down the wall until he came to sit on his six.

"Jack!" he heard her call out worried. Sam retracted her legs from his hips to get onto her knees and then he felt her fingers slide into his hair, probing cautiously for any injuries. His healing powers immediately worked on the bump he could feel form on the back of his head and the pain lessened almost instantly. So he could focus wholly on the feel of her fingers running through his hair. He groaned, but in pleasure rather than in pain.

"Jack, I'm sorry!" she said contritely. "I didn't notice… I was just so happy!"

"S'alright," he decided, more than placated by her finger's movements in his hair, before he asked smugly: "Happy, huh?"

"Yes," she confirmed, smiling one of her big, thousand-watt-smiles at him. "You have no idea how long I was dreaming of this day…"

"Somehow I can sympathize," he said ironically.

Sam grinned and then leaned forwards to kiss him. Jack met her eagerly. He hadn't kissed her in days, but from all the kissing they had done before, the sudden loss of it had felt considerably longer. He could feel the kiss was initially intended as an apology but he immediately deepened the kiss, pushing her mouth open and thrusting his tongue in, turning the kiss into much more. She whimpered in response and her fingers in his hair pulled him closer to her. Guess, Jack hadn't been the only one to miss their physical contact.

Jack's hands found her waist and grabbing onto it, he drew her in to him, settling her in his lap. She sighed approvingly and using this opportunity to its fullest, Jack let his hands roam all over her body, touching all he had been reduced to thinking and dreaming about the past time. In response she pressed closer to him, her breasts rubbing against his chest through their clothes. Their tongues danced with each other's, taking and giving greedily at the same time in an almost desperate attempt to make up for the lost time.

Jack felt Sam's hands slide down his front, her fingers caressing his pecs and abs through his clothes and he reached out, one of his arms going around her back to hold her close to him. She shuddered against him, breaking their kiss, and arched into his touch when his fingers ghosted over her lower back. Her breathing was getting frantic and irregular and when Jack slid his other hand up to caress her neck, he could feel her pulse race underneath her smooth skin.

Soon she trembled in his arms and then she rocked her hips against his. Jack bit back a groan when he felt her slide over his rapidly building arousal. Her body warmth seeped over into his body and he heard her moan when her center bumped into his pelvis. For a moment Jack lost his concentration and raised his head to suck in much needed air. Her arms went around his shoulders when he straightened up and she laid her head against his. With her sitting in his lap, she was now slightly taller, which made her chin press against his temple and her rapid breath wash down over his ear from her bent-over position. Jack shifted slightly so that he could kiss that sensitive spot under her ear and he heard her breath hitch in reaction, making him smile in an automatic response.

His large hands leisurely slid up and down her back, feeling her muscles twitch under his caresses, until they settled on her six. She began squirming under his possessive grip and by this pressed her hips against his. Jack closed his eyes when he felt her hips roll against his erection and held his breath. It was exquisite torture. He wanted her to continue so much, the feeling being just so incredible, but he was simply unable to keep still and not react to her. Grunting, Jack bent a leg to have better leverage and with his hands on her six, he began leading her purposefully, while grinding against her. Sam cried out and threw her head back, her whole back arching, before an overwhelming shudder made her curl back around him again. Her breathing faltered and Jack could feel his own stutter while his hands continued to press her against him, sliding her over him.

For a moment they both sat, eyes firmly shut and breathing heavily while enjoying the movements of their bodies against each other. Until it wasn't enough anymore. With impatient hands, Jack fumbled her pants open and the moment she caught on, he felt one of her hands work on his belt. They had the clothes opened quickly and as if they were thinking the same, he felt her fingers on his flesh the moment he pushed his hand into her panties. Jack gritted his teeth in a desperate try to hold out when her fingers began working him quite expertly. Then again, most of the time it didn't need much more for him than the simple knowledge that it was Sam who was caressing him.

By now all Jack could hear anymore was their frantic panting and the blood rushing in his ears. He couldn't see more of her than her neck that was slowly overcome by a deep blush that had nothing to do with embarrassment and so Jack concentrated on the incredible feeling of her in his arms. He slipped a finger into her and in an automatic reflex her grip on him tightened. They both groaned out loud.

Sam's free hand slid to his jaw, holding onto his neck and entangling in the strands of hair at the back of his neck, while she teasingly ran her fingers over his flesh, speeding up and slowing down her strokes alternately, almost driving him insane. In response, he added another finger and pressed the heel of his hand against her front, making her jerk. They both gasped, lost in the sensations. The urge to take control and speed things up was overwhelming but Jack wrestled it down, concentrating on enjoying the feeling of having her in his arms again.

He leaned back to watch her. She had straightened up, her eyes closed and her teeth were digging into her lower lip while she concentrated on the sensations they were creating. From the expression on her face he could see she was lost to the mood, her whole attention focused on their movements that drove them both closer to the edge.

Jack took his hand from her six and moved it to her chin. He pulled her closer to him and slid his tongue over her bottom lip to get her teeth to release it before she would bite through it. A shuddering breath left her when she complied and with his lips against hers, he whispered: "Sam…! Look at me."

Her eyes opened and with a bit of rapid blinking she focused on him. Her light blue eyes had darkened considerably, sparkling with emotions and energy. As always Jack could read her mood accurately by a simple look in her eyes and he groaned quietly at the overwhelming longing, passion and love he was greeted with. He held her gaze and she looked right back. They reassured themselves of the other's love when they picked up their pace, their movements getting more and more frantic and wavering.

Soon Jack felt his body begin to tingle all over. His eyes shut firmly while he tried to push back the impending orgasm that was threatening to overwhelm him, so he could wait for her to get there, too. Sam's mouth pressed onto his but with her erratic breathing it wasn't really turning into a kiss. "It's okay…" she breathed against him.

Damn her, Jack thought idly, before his body took control, pretty much telling his stubborn mind to go and wait in a corner until it was needed again. His hips thrusted up into the tight circle of her fingers, increasing the friction, while his hand on her tightened uncontrolled. It only needed him a few moves and he was there, his orgasm racing through his body with a force that knocked out any other feeling. Only when he came down once more, he realized Sam must have followed him immediately going by the already subsiding trembles and twitches that controlled her body.

Sweating and gasping, Jack leaned back against the cool wall in his back while his arms went around Sam, pulling her against his body. She nestled her head into his neck and then he could feel her relax, her whole body going slack on top of his. Jack turned his head so he could bury his nose in her hair and breathing in her familiar scent, he slowly felt his racing heart calm down. He felt completely relaxed and peaceful while sitting there with her.

Speaking into her hair, he quietly rumbled: "Just so you know, I _am_ going to move back into our tent!"

With her energy spent, he didn't think she would argue about that anymore, so he wasn't surprised when she nodded against his shoulder.

Smiling satisfied, Jack began to stroke a hand slowly up and down her back in a soothing rhythm. Finally, everything was going back to how it had been before.


	45. Resisting

_**Author's note**_ _: Once more, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Five – Resisting_

The alarms surprised Daniel. Somewhere in the back of his mind the unscheduled off-world activation had registered but this was common enough around the base for him to not pay that much attention to it. What definitely had registered with him though were the doubling, blaring alarms that he knew were announcing an attack. Daniel rushed from his lab and almost smacked right into Colonel Dixon, who was jogging down the hallway with Doctor Balinsky right behind him. Without thinking, the archaeologist followed them.

The base had totally gotten closed off, they soon realized when a few of their ways were blocked by the unyielding blast doors that refused to open for them even though Colonel Dixon had the current status of a 2IC to the base. So, kinda having to take the long route, they made their way down to Level 28. And arriving there, they were greeted with complete chaos. The bodies of numerous SF's lay on the ground, one or two still moving but injured. Daniel wanted to stop and help them but Dixon shooed him and Balinsky forward, insisting that they needed to see what was happening first. Then the Colonel, who was the only one with a weapon, made his way towards the control room with Daniel and Balinsky trailing him closely. Daniel had noticed the scorched burn marks on the wall, which indicated staff weapon fire, so he wasn't really surprised when they stumbled upon the first Jaffa bodies on the ground, followed by a few living Jaffa guards. Dixon practically had to shoot their way free to the control room but when they arrived there and saw the Jaffa flooding their 'Gate room Daniel immediately knew they had no possibility of winning this. Balinsky's rapid paling and Dixon's colorful cursing only confirmed his suspicions. It didn't take long until they were spotted and knowing that now he couldn't shoot their way out anymore, not with this superiority against them, Dixon hid his Berretta in his boot just in time before Jaffa stormed the control room and he had to hand over his P90. Together, the Jaffa herded them roughly up to the briefing room.

And since then Daniel had been sitting there. The Jaffa had thoroughly searched the whole base and Daniel, who was sitting with his back against the staircase's railing which left him with a clear sight down to the control room's monitors currently displaying the surveillance camera's footage, had seen them shoot down anyone trying to put up a fight mercilessly. By now Daniel had lost count of how many SF's had already fallen or had been left to their fate severely wounded. Daniel had also watched one or two familiar faces go down from another SG team but so far most officers of the SG units encountering the Jaffa had been smart enough to surrender and were bit by bit brought to the briefing room.

As he had done so often in the long hours since the Jaffa had taken over the SGC, Daniel let his eyes roam over the crowded briefing room. Next to him sat General Hammond and President Hayes, both with downright murderous expressions on their face. In contrast to Daniel they were restrained, their hands bound together on their back, which probably was curtesy of the President's personal guard that apparently had put up quite the fight. But seeing that Daniel couldn't spot a single one of the men anywhere in the room, he figured they had all died in the erupting shooting. Far away from them, huddled in a corner to hide between the masses of bodies in the room, Daniel knew Senator Kinsey sat, having been brought in by a Jaffa patrol shortly after Daniel himself, but the man did his best to disappear within the crowd to go unnoticed and so Daniel wasn't wasting much thoughts on the Senator. Opposite of Daniel sat Colonel Dixon and Doctor Balinsky, the Colonel looking as displeased as possible but still rebellious, while Balinsky seemed overtaxed with the whole situation.

Daniel lifted his head and looked over the uncountable heads. Most of them were officers of the SG teams or Tech Sergeants, who had, much like Daniel himself, raced for the control room, hoping to still be able to do something. Daniel saw Ferretti and SG-2 over at the other end of the room together with Major Pierce and SG-15. Reynolds sat with his Marines somewhere in the center of the room and further away to one of the room's walls, Daniel recognized the for once unhurt Sergeant Siler. Daniel even saw a few civilian scientists sit in between the sea of olive green and blue BDUs. Daniel guessed that the emergency programs had ensured a few, critical levels had been completely sealed off, like the infirmary, their energy supply and Level 19, where quite a few dangerous and sensitive experiments were running, so a whole lot of the civilian scientists who worked on Level 19 would be imprisoned within the SGC, but at least be safe from capture by the Jaffa. The ones currently present were the ones operating on Level 18, just like Daniel himself, meaning they were linguists, archaeologists, botanists or something like that. Daniel could see that they, in spite of all the battle-hardened military men, were quite scared and whenever a Jaffa would enter and bring in another captive, they would duck and try to get overlooked.

On the briefing table in the middle of the room lay a few unconscious men the Jaffa had dragged in. Daniel hadn't seen many of them clearly but the one lying in the front he _could_ see was Sergeant Harriman. The faithful technician's form was lying on the table unmoving and slowly the blood flowing from him began to drip over the table's edge, adding to the nasty air in the crowded room. Quite a few officers had been brought in somehow wounded and the air was filled with the metallic stench of blood and the repulsive scent of burnt flesh where a staff weapon blast had hit home. Due to pain and fear, a few men had lost control over their stomachs and bladders, adding to the unbearable reek that was floating around the room, making Daniel's stomach roll.

Sometime during the night the Jaffa brought in Teal'c and Janet. Daniel wasn't surprised at seeing Teal'c. He had suspected Teal'c had to be somewhere within the base and was keeping the Jaffa busy but he still flinched at seeing the state his friend was in. He was bleeding from several injuries, his expression stoic but as close to in pain as Daniel had ever seen him. What did surprise Daniel however was seeing Janet. He had thought her to be safe within the infirmary but he quickly realized she just had to have been somewhere else in the base when the lockdown had happened and she would have had no possibility to return to the infirmary. In fact, if Daniel was correct, then he'd seen MacKenzie somewhere here, too. Well, at least he couldn't see Warner anywhere or the patients in the infirmary would have had to make do without a Doctor in Charge.

Teal'c's eyes swept over the assembled and spotting Daniel, he made his way over to him, pushing Janet forward in front of him. Janet immediately offered to treat the Jaffa but Teal'c assured her that he was going to be fine given a bit time in which his Goa'uld larva could heal him. The CMO also tried treating other injured but the facts that she had no supplies with her and the Jaffa standing guard throughout the room were reacting averse to any of their prisoners moving made Daniel hold her back. He could see the strain it took on her to refrain from helping all the wounded but Daniel figured they would have the bigger problem if the Jaffa would shoot down their best medic.

The night was uncomfortable to say the least. Despite the night lighting flashing over their heads and the alarms continuing to blare, most tried to get some sleep and Teal'c had retreated into kel'no'reem to recover. General Hammond and President Hayes were whispering to each other from time to time but the General was careful to not draw any unwanted attention to the President. Right now none of the Jaffa had any idea what a powerful hostage they had in their hands and both men thought it wisest to leave it at that. Colonel Dixon was dozing but Balinsky next to him was wide awake, his unsettled blue eyes meeting Daniel's from time to time, before the scientist would pull himself together again. Sometimes there were groans to be heard when an injured shifted or moved in their attempt to sleep. Exhausted, Janet had fallen asleep with her head on Daniel's shoulder and, astonishingly, that was what grounded the archaeologist. Normally, whenever they fell into the enemy's hands on a mission, Daniel was much less scared. But then Jack and Sam were there and Daniel would know they would handle the situation somehow. Jack always displayed a composed attitude which did a lot to keep his team calm and so far there had been no tricky situation Sam hadn't found an exit out to for them. But this time? Neither of his friends were there. Teal'c still was with him and Daniel would be eternally grateful for that, but Jack and Sam were gone. And normally whenever they got abducted while off-world they had the reassurance that the SGC would notice when they missed their scheduled check-ins and send an S&R team after them. Now the whole SGC was under alien foothold and they could only hope nobody was trying to come for them because right now they could at least contain the catastrophe to the SGC.

Daniel looked down at Janet's head on his shoulder. She was an US Air Force Major and still he felt strangely responsible for her, as if he had to watch over her. Absentmindedly Daniel contemplated if this was how Jack felt all the time with Sam. The feeling was… odd.

Trying not to think about this – or his friends – too much, Daniel had tried to sleep as well but he was acutely aware that time was running out fast for them and it refused to let him sleep. Daniel knew that the SGC would only be the first step. Surely the Jaffa hadn't come to say hello and then leave. No, they were here to start an attack on Earth. And either they would do it via the Stargate or they would come with spaceships and had taken the SGC over to prevent them their way out or any possibility to contact an ally. And Daniel seriously doubted they would wait until any ally of them would catch on that Earth couldn't be contacted through the Stargate anymore. The Jaffa wouldn't waste any time to attack Earth as long as they still had the element of surprise on their side.

So Daniel knew they had to warn Earth somehow, but how? Their whole contact with the outside had been interrupted and even if they could get some message across to the Army, it would take too long for them to figure out on their own what had happened down here. The possibilities what could have happened in the SGC until then were so devastating Daniel's head was swimming only thinking of them. The Jaffa had all possibilities to use the hostages they had in any way they could think of. They could use them as a shield or as a pressurizing medium, or even implant them with a Goa'uld and slowly infiltrate Earth's ranks (even if that seemed rather unlikely from Daniel's point of view).

Daniel was ripped from his spiraling thoughts when he heard the crackling of the Stargate through the control room's destroyed window. By now all alarms were continually blaring so an incoming wormhole wouldn't be noticed but Daniel was familiar enough with the kawoosh of an engaging wormhole to recognize it nevertheless.

Tense, Daniel waited and it wasn't long until he heard voices approach. The way their Jaffa guards straightened upon hearing it made Daniel suspect that the Goa'uld responsible for this attack was finally gracing them with their presence. Or rather the Goa'uld, as in plural. Daniel hadn't recognized the symbols on the foreheads of the attacking Jaffa but he had noticed there were different ones. In most of them Daniel had recognized what Teal'c had shown him to be Ba'al's symbol but quite a few were carrying a curvy, squiggly symbol neither he nor Teal'c had ever seen before.

Footsteps on the stairs behind him told Daniel he was right. Someone was coming for them. He turned his head and saw a Jaffa with a golden tattoo on his forehead appear which told the archaeologist he was a First Prime. Daniel felt Teal'c shift more than he saw it and knew immediately his friend was awake and observing closely. Behind the First Prime a woman gracefully climbed the stairs until she came to stand in front of all assembled in the briefing room. Daniel almost choked when he recognized her. Nirrti!

The Goa'uld let her eyes rove over the room, her nose wrinkling when she took in the disgusting stench lingering in the air. She smiled however when her eyes fell upon Daniel.

She waited until a man arrived behind her though before she made any move toward him. The man was tall and heavily muscled, clad in a roman-style tunic and sandals and his irises were glowing with the light that usually betrayed the Goa'uld symbiote in their host. Daniel had never seen the man before but the arrogant, brutal look he wore wasn't something the peaceful archaeologist liked to see.

Nirrti nodded her head to what Daniel assumed was the male Goa'uld's First Prime and the Jaffa stomped over, reaching out for Daniel.

"Hey!" Daniel protested loudly when the First Prime grabbed his upper arm in a crushing grip. Janet next to him jolted awake, looking around confused when Daniel was forced to stand up and instantly Teal'c was at his side. Daniel kept his eyes on Nirrti but he was somehow aware that they held the whole room's attention, everyone's eyes glued to them.

" _Doctor Jackson… and the shol'va_ ," Nirrti said with her usual conceited attitude. Daniel looked right at the black-haired woman and while he loathed seeing her, he still felt gratitude at the fact that he wasn't forced to see her in Sam's body any longer.

Nirrti let her eyes travel around and then asked: " _So where is the rest of SG-1?_ "

"Not here," Daniel answered, delighted.

Behind Nirrti, the male Goa'uld's face narrowed annoyed and then he snapped an order at his First Prime. Before Daniel had processed what the Goa'uld had commanded, the Jaffa had punched Daniel, right into the face. Pain exploded in his cheekbone and nose and immediately his mouth filled with the disgusting taste of blood. Daniel spit it out with a groan. His upper jaw hurt and if he was right, then blood was dripping from his nose. One of his eyes was twitching but at least Daniel thought it to be uninjured.

"Daniel!" he heard Janet cry out concerned behind him but he concentrated on Nirrti, who was barking something at her partner in rapid Goa'uld, clearly admonishing him.

Then Nirrti turned back to him. " _I will only ask this once, Doctor Jackson,_ " she threatened. " _Where are Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter?_ "

Daniel held his aching jaw when he spoke because it aggravated his injury. "As I said, they aren't here!" he insisted. "They are off-world!"

Nirrti's gaze bored into his. Daniel stared right back. Technically speaking, he knew he was somehow lying to the Goa'uld but Jack had taught him that lying to an enemy was working best if you kept as close to the truth as possible and so Daniel hoped he sounded convincing.

" _Without you and the shol'va?_ " Nirrti questioned skeptically.

"We don't do every mission together," Daniel explained. Still the truth, even if Jack and Sam weren't on a mission to begin with.

" _So where exactly are they?_ " she inquired.

"Don't know. I wasn't there when they departed."

Nirrti's eyes narrowed displeased but at least it looked as if she believed his words. " _When are they due to return?_ "

Daniel almost snorted. "Oh, not for a _long_ time…" he answered, managing to sound neutral even if that fact was saddening him.

Now Nirrti positively frowned. " _That is too bad. I would have wanted them to see the destruction of their world,_ " she declared.

Daniel choked. "The… _what?!_ " he almost spat, too late in covering it up and once more, he saw the First Prime strike out for him. This time however, Teal'c blocked him effortlessly in time, sparing Daniel another direct hit. The First Prime retreated and immediately Daniel heard the crackling of activating staff weapons all around the room that were being aimed at his friend.

"I'm sorry!" Daniel cried out, holding up his hands in a placating gesture. He didn't want Teal'c to get shot! With this much weapons aimed at him, Daniel doubted Junior would still be able to safe him.

" _Lower your weapons! He is to be brought in front of the High Council! Alive!_ " Nirrti snapped irritated in Goa'uld and since he wasn't distracted this time, Daniel clearly understood her.

Daniel saw an eyebrow twitch in Teal'c's face, telling him that the Jaffa would prefer death over being brought in front of whatever Goa'uld wanted him. But Daniel was glad that, for now, nobody would seriously try to hurt his friend. After all, Teal'c was all he had left of his little family.

The Jaffa deactivated their weapons and returned to their guarding positions.

Daniel turned back to the Goa'uld in front of him and knowing that he was toeing a fine line but trusting on the fact that there had been enough history between Nirrti and SG-1 that she would allow him this much insolence, he asked: "So this is what this is all about? The Goa'uld are going to take over Earth?"

Nirrti smiled at him in an odd mixture of friendliness and cruelty while switching back to English so that, undoubtedly, everyone in the briefing room could understand her words and their meaning. " _Wrong, Doctor Jackson,_ " she said, almost kindly. " _The Goa'uld are going to_ obliterate _Earth and the Tau'ri! You have annoyed the High Council long enough. Maybe we will enslave a few of you but trust me, neither of_ you _here will live to see this day._ "

Daniel was slightly shocked. He knew the Goa'uld's cruelty firsthand but this seemed a bit much! They had apparently stepped onto someone's toes one time too much for this harsh retribution.

Still, Daniel thought, this wasn't the Goa'uld's usual style. They would have rather taken the advantage they had and overthrow Earth. They would have made an example out of the Tau'ri home world to crush whatever resistance out there in the galaxy might have formed for the coming thousands of years. And Daniel would have betted anything that the Tau'ri's frontline warriors, meaning him, Jack, Sam, Teal'c, the General and the SG teams, would have been fought for as slaves, because they would have been the ultimate status symbol of a Goa'uld's power. So to kill them all off wasn't really Goa'uld High Council style, Daniel figured. There had to be someone else behind all this. Maybe the mysterious Goa'uld that had sent his Jaffa here with Ba'al's, Nirrti's and the other, unknown Goa'uld's, but hadn't shown up personally himself?

Nirrti studied him for a moment before she sighed: " _Such a shame, actually. I would have liked to keep a few of you and experiment on you, but then again, there are more superior specimen of the Tau'ri out there in the galaxy._ "

Daniel said nothing to it.

Nirrti motioned behind her to the control room. " _Now show me how to operate your Chaapa'ai._ "

Daniel couldn't help the sarcastic remark that spilled from his mouth before his head had any possibility to edit it. "I thought you're supposed to be a god? Shouldn't you know how to use it?"

Again the male Goa'uld behind Nirrti bristled at his attitude and with a crisp order he had his First Prime lower his staff weapon towards Daniel's chest. Daniel looked down onto the crackling weapon, almost calm. He knew one shot was all it would take and he would be a goner. Still, the smart archaeologist had expected this outcome the moment Nirrti had singled him out from the crowd. Daniel wouldn't talk. He wouldn't give the Goa'uld any information and possibly another advantage! And this was as good as signing his own death sentence.

Nirrti looked at him calculating and then, slowly and intentionally, she reached out and pushed the First Prime's staff weapon a little to the right. Confused, Daniel stared at the weapon that now pointed at some spot to his side, not aiming at him any longer. A sharp intake of breath however made him turn and realize that the weapon was now targeting Janet!

The CMO looked highly uncomfortable but stood her ground. Daniel swallowed nervously, his hands getting sweaty. He seriously didn't like the picture he was presented with and briefly he thought of dragging her out of the way. It would probably resume in him getting shot but then at least she would be safe. Daniel couldn't bear the thought of losing another friend. He had already lost Jack and Sam. And now Janet, too?

But then another fact filtered in for Daniel. He couldn't do anything, namely for the same reason why Janet wasn't trying to rescue herself in any way. She was blocking the way. If she would step aside, the First Prime would have direct aim at General Hammond and President Hayes! Janet was prepared to catch the bullet for her Commander-in-chief and Daniel had no other possibility than to let her.

Gritting his teeth, the archaeologist turned forward again, only to be presented with Nirrti's knowing smirk. Daniel realized they had severely underestimated the minor System Lord. All this time they had concentrated on whatever threat Jack and Sam could pose to Earth and had totally lost sight on a very real threat still out there: Nirrti. Sam had held back on all information she could when she had been possessed by the Goa'uld but still Nirrti had to have seen quite a bit of the SGC and its proceedings, and this was giving the Goa'uld large tactical advantages.

Daniel gnawed on his cheek in thought. The Goa'uld had probably used the past months to prepare for this here. They had thoroughly organized this assault and had totally taken them by surprise when, all the time, they could have been preparing for this! The Goa'uld had given the SGC a breather until they wouldn't be suspicious anymore and used the time to arrange everything without a hurry. And the SGC had played right into their hands…

Frustrated, Daniel wanted to punch something. If anything, they had even managed to drive off their last resort Daniel could think of: Jack and Sam. Their powers might have been able to counter the Goa'uld's advance but yes, the NID had successfully scared them away and now they wouldn't come to know their home world was going to be erased by the Goa'uld.

" _I am waiting,_ " Nirrti prompted him impatiently and once more Daniel shot a quick glance toward Janet. The CMO shook her head almost unnoticeably, telling him to stay silent, but Daniel had no idea if he could really do it. He felt obligated to the SGC and wanted to keep their secrets to not endanger Earth but he felt just as much obligated to Janet who had saved his life more times than Daniel could count.

"Do it, Doctor Jackson," General Hammond ordered from the background.

Skeptically, Daniel looked at him but the General looked back calmly. "It's okay, son," he decided. "She will get that information one way or another."

Daniel understood. As long as Nirrti just wanted a bit information on their controlling computers, it was fine. And certainly General Hammond wasn't willing for her to find another pressurizing medium – for example the President – when she had shot down Janet.

"Alright," Daniel concluded grimly. With edgy movements he followed Nirrti and the male Goa'uld down in the control room, the First Prime trailing him with his weapon at the ready, and showed them what they wanted to know. Daniel was careful to not give them any clues on any other system and kept all information they demanded to the bare minimum, ensuring that, essentially, they still had no knowledge whatsoever of how the system was operated. Yes, they could now dial out but Daniel knew, in contrast to the Goa'uld, that any low ranking technician could deny them all access with only a click.

Daniel waited to the side while Nirrti and her companion tampered with the controlling computers and his wandering eyes fell onto something. One of the monitors displayed a rather interesting list. Daniel's eyes went over it and he realized it was the list of planets he, Teal'c, Jack and Jacob had put together when Nirrti had abducted Sam. Daniel's attention focused on a certain planet and slowly an idea began to take form within his brain. That could actually be possible…!

Inconspicuously, Daniel moved to the side and shut down the monitor when the Goa'uld were looking toward the engaging wormhole in the 'Gate room. No need to alert Nirrti, Daniel thought inwardly.

Not long after, he was escorted back into the briefing room and dropped where his friends sat. Teal'c looked at him concerned but Daniel waved him off, telling him nonverbally he was fine. Janet immediately reached over and prodded his injured face and Daniel simply let her proceed. He was pretty sure it looked worse than it was but if she wanted to help him, then he wouldn't deny her. His eyes however tracked the First Prime while he returned to his masters' sides. Daniel could hear the Goa'uld in the control room speak in their own language and while he followed their conversation with one ear, Daniel cautiously extended his leg until he could kick Dixon.

The Colonel tensed but made sure to let a few seconds pass before he turned for the archaeologist. He raised an eyebrow and Daniel could tell he had his whole attention. As well as that of Teal'c, Janet, General Hammond and President Hayes.

"I have an idea," Daniel whispered. "But I will need a distraction."

Without even asking what he was about to do, simply trusting the archaeologist, Dixon nodded immediately. "Gimme a bit time to round up the guys and we'll take care of the guards," he murmured back.

Daniel inclined his head in agreement and almost immediately he saw Dixon stretch. The Colonel made sure his arm bumped into Major Thomas from SG-17. The Major looked over to Dixon and inconspicuously, Dixon began to deliver the message. And just like playing telephone, the message began to make its way through the ranks, one officer after the other nodding their consent to Dixon, careful to be stealthy and inconspicuous.

Meanwhile, Daniel removed his wristwatch. He tried not to wince when he saw the large bloodstains on his best suit but then again, when they were through with this, it would probably be ruined anyway.

Leaning slightly toward Janet, Daniel asked: "Do you have a pen with you?"

She nodded and took one from the breast pocket of her coat. Daniel pulled up his leg to cover what he was doing and then began to scribble on the wristwatch's cloth. Cautiously Janet shot a glance over his shoulder and then read quietly: "Jaffa. SGC. Help."

Daniel nodded, retracing the words until they could clearly been read from the narrow space on his watch.

"What are you going to do?" Janet asked breathlessly.

"I believe Daniel Jackson wants to use the Stargate to send a message," Teal'c's low rumble cut in.

Daniel nodded.

"And who do you want to alert?" Janet inquired. "The Asgard? The Tok'ra?"

Daniel shook his head. "We don't know an address where we could contact the Asgard and we also don't know the Tok'ra's current home world. So I'm trying for Jack and Sam."

Janet and General Hammond sucked in a breath surprised and even Teal'c blinked in the Jaffa's equivalent of astonishment.

"You _know_ where they are?!" Janet whispered incredulous.

Again, Daniel shook his head. "I have no idea. But down in the control room, I thought of a possible place. I admit the odds are small that they really settled on _this_ planet but it's still the best chance we have!"

Janet sighed disappointed. She had seemingly hoped for a better, more defined plan but General Hammond looked willing to try anything.

"Doctor Jackson is right," he concluded. "It's the best chance we have right now."

Daniel smiled at the General, trying for reassuring when he himself was nowhere sure his gut feeling was right.

"You might need some help, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c offered.

Daniel was about to decline when an idea shot through his mind. If Teal'c helped him, he would be way faster and going by Nirrti's reaction earlier, the Jaffa seemed in the better position to survive this than Daniel himself was.

Daniel nodded furious and then reached forward. He pulled the Jaffa's large hand into his lap and scribbled a few symbols onto his palm. Teal'c looked slightly indignant when his eyes roamed his painted palm but he listened stoically when Daniel asked: "Can you dial this address for me?"

Teal'c inclined his head in agreement. Daniel was acutely aware that the Jaffa had no idea of the Tau'ri's computers but he sincerely hoped the other man had watched often enough to know what was to be done.

And then Daniel had to wait. He had to wait while Dixon tried to get the SG teams ready for the distraction and he had to wait for the Goa'uld to leave the control room. He was impatient because he was all too aware of the passing time and he feared his fidgeting would give him away. Teal'c had gone back to pretending he was meditating and Dixon was busy, but Daniel felt useless. He heard General Hammond explain to President Hayes what they were about to try but he concentrated on the two Goa'uld speaking in the control room. Unfortunately, Nirrti wasn't doing him the favor to let something important slip. She knew too well that he could speak their language. The most Daniel gathered was that the other Goa'uld was a minor System Lord in Ba'al's services called Ares. The Greek god of war. How fitting, Daniel thought.

Daniel's fingers edgily drummed onto his thigh, he himself not even aware of the movement until Janet laid her hand over his. Stunned, Daniel looked over to her and she shot him an encouraging smile.

"You can do this," she said full of conviction and then went back to sit leaned against him with her head on his shoulder. For once, Daniel had no idea what he should answer to that. He knew he would do it. He really had no other choice. Still, her confidence and trust in him made something within him warm considerably. It confused him and because he lacked something to say back, he just reached out, took her hand and squeezed it shortly.

They sat like that for hours until Colonel Dixon finally signaled Daniel they were ready. Daniel listened for Nirrti and Ares but there was no sound coming from the control room. He had missed them going anywhere thanks to the distraction Janet's close proximity was turning out to be but Daniel was willing to take the chance. Who knew when the next one would come?

Carefully, Daniel separated from Janet and then shifted to pull his legs under his body so he could bolt immediately. Daniel nodded at Dixon and without a warning the Colonel shot up and rushed towards the first Jaffa. Daniel saw him smash his elbow into the surprised Jaffa's face before Dixon pulled his Berretta out of his boot and shot. All around the room, Daniel saw officers jump up and join the Colonel, attacking the completely surprised Jaffa. Daniel didn't wait to see how they were doing. As soon as he had a clear way, he sprinted for the stairs, Teal'c on his heels. Daniel took two steps at a time and when he arrived in the control room, it was thankfully empty. He left Teal'c at the controlling computers that were still slightly sticky with Harriman's blood and raced down the next stairs. Daniel reached the hallway the moment he heard the Stargate begin to spin. Just like when Nirrti and Ares had arrived the alarms weren't changing but Daniel still knew the Goa'uld would hear the noise of the rotating Stargate. Daniel raced for the destroyed blast doors and slid into the 'Gate room the moment the last chevron locked and the wormhole kawooshed to life. Out of breath Daniel rushed for the ramp leading to the calmly shimmering event horizon. He could hear loud, enraged shouts in Goa'uld in the control room through the smashed window and although he didn't spare the time to look, he knew Teal'c had been overpowered by the enemy Jaffa. He just hoped Teal'c had managed to conceal the planet they'd dialed in time. As if to confirm his worries staff weapon blasts immediately began to impact all around Daniel. Holding his arms over his head, Daniel sprinted for the wormhole, hoping against all odds that he had chosen the right planet. What if they were somewhere else?

Gasping, Daniel jumped onto the ramp leading to the Stargate. He knew he was now a clear target but he just needed a few seconds of luck! Just a few feet and he would be there! Just a few more feet and he could–

Something exploded in his back and Daniel felt all air leave his lungs when he got thrown forward. He staggered from the force of the blast and then fell face-first down onto the ramp. He struggled to breathe, not getting any air into his body, and from the rapidly growing wet feeling on his back he knew he was bleeding. Not from the staff weapon's blast, that would have cauterized the wound, but from an internal injury that was spilling blood through what he imagined was a nice, huge hole in his back. Daniel guessed it had hit his lungs. The fact that he couldn't breathe and the gurgling sounds escaping his throat made him fear he was drowning in his own blood. Daniel knew the injury was fatal immediately. If he wouldn't suffocate in a few minutes, then the blood loss would do him in. He was sure of it.

With his last strength, Daniel reached out for the event horizon. His fingers failed to reach it by a few inches. Damn it all!

Wheezing, Daniel reached for the wristwatch he clutched in his other hand that was buried under his heavy, unmoving body. His strength was leaving him fast and already he had no feeling in his lower body anymore. Daniel's fingers closed around the watch and with his vision blackening partly, he extended his arm, intending to throw the wristwatch into the event horizon.

The event horizon blinked out of existence suddenly when nothing and nobody was using it. Daniel blinked at the concrete wall behind the Stargate. His arm lay stretched out on the ramp, next to where his head had fallen down. The wristwatch was gone but Daniel didn't know whether he had managed to throw it into the wormhole at the last second or it had simply dropped behind the Stargate, missing the engaged wormhole by the fraction of a second.

And Daniel couldn't feel it in himself anymore to care. His body felt heavy and empty. He was dimly aware that there was some liquid spilling from his mouth, blood most likely, but his consciousness was beginning to falter and everything was getting hazy and unimportant.

His last thought was of his friends: Jack, Sam, Teal'c and Janet. And then Doctor Daniel Jackson felt his eyes fall shut and his consciousness falling down over a deep edge before nothing registered with him anymore.


	46. Knowing

_**Author's notes**_ _: Again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _As for the last chapter: I'm also not fond of how it ended but there simply was no way it could have gone down in a different way, not with all the odds against the SGC and Daniel…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Six – Knowing_

"You know that every time I look up at the stars here I'm reminded of our home, even if they are not at all alike?" Sam asked quietly.

Jack grunted a noncommittal answer while gazing over her head, completely relaxed. They were sitting at the highest point with a still intact ceiling Laterra's aboveground structures still had, looking at the stars in the sky over the ruins all around them through a fat hole where once one of the outer walls had been. Around them, light, warm rain drizzled onto the ground, bringing a fresh, clean scent over to them with the light gusts of wind that rustled through their hair. Jack sat leaned back against a pile of crumbled stones and Sam sat in front of him between his legs, her back placed against his chest and her head propped up against his collarbone, one of her hands drawing lazy patterns on one of his knees.

"Sometimes I miss them," Sam admitted.

"Who?" Jack asked lazily although listening intently.

"The stars. I miss exploring them with SG-1," she explained.

Jack grimaced involuntarily. Of course. He could very well relate to the feeling, but unfortunately there was nothing he could do to make it easier for her. They were never going to be a part of the SGC again and while they still had a Stargate to travel through the universe, it definitely wouldn't be the same as it had been with SG-1.

"We could still go somewhere. Sometime. Not for a raid but to explore…" he offered while motioning towards the Stargate which was a dark shape in the distance, only barely illuminated by the light coming from the stars. Laterra was a fascinating contrast. The planet had a small moon but was circling so slow that for a few nights in a row the moon couldn't be seen at all. In contrast to that, quite a few stars were closer to Laterra than any was to Earth and so their light usually lit up the night sky.

"We could," Sam agreed but he heard her reluctance. "And risk run into a SG team. Or a Goa'uld. Or someone else we know. The raids already are quite the risk."

Yes, there was that, Jack acknowledged inwardly. "We could be careful," he suggested. But he knew going to unknown planets without a MALP to check out the situation first was akin to Russian roulette. They could stumble upon everything from an inhabitable or lethal environment to a Goa'uld reigned planet to any other hostile race and then their death would be the best option. And going to one of the planets they knew – which was about the only possibility to get food for the aforementioned reasons – meant to risk bumping into someone they knew.

"It still wouldn't be the same," Sam said lost in thoughts.

Jack nodded, bumping against her head in the process. He didn't like when she was unhappy.

"Do you think they have already replaced us?" she asked quietly.

"On SG-1?" he asked back softly.

She nodded silently. Jack debated for a moment what he should tell her, but he knew she was already aware herself and so she would notice immediately if he would try to sugarcoat it for her. "Well, it's been months since we've gone," he said. "Life's going on. So of course they would have given SG-1 over to other officers."

"Who do you think is it?" she inquired.

Jack shrugged. "No idea. Since it's the flagship team, I can't see General Hammond give it to any newbies. It would probably be some higher ranking, experienced officers…"

"Like who?" she speculated. "Colonel Reynolds? He's been third-in-command after you. Or Major Ferretti? He's leading SG-2, the only team built together with SG-1?"

"Could be anyone," Jack answered, only mildly interested.

Sam sighed and subconsciously snuggled closer into his loose embrace. "I just hope they keep a careful eye on Daniel and Teal'c…" she murmured.

Jack could hear the worry for their friends in her voice and once again realized how much she missed them. Not that he didn't share these sentiments…

He pressed a light, encouraging kiss to the top of her head before resting his cheek against her head. "You know Teal'c," he soothed. "He's strong. He'll watch out for himself. _And_ Daniel. He will protect Space-monkey when he gets lost in some artifact again."

Sam nodded but Jack could still feel the sadness radiating off of her. "Do you regret it?" he asked lowly.

"What?" she asked back.

"Coming here," he clarified.

She thought it through for a moment and holding his breath, Jack waited. It was one of his constant worries that she had just come with him out of the pressure the situation and his decision to go had put her under. He wanted her to be with him out of her free will with an astonishingly strong longing.

"No," she finally said. "I sometimes regret how it all turned out, but the outcome? This I could never regret."

She squeezed his knee while speaking and relieved Jack dropped another quick kiss to the top of her head.

"Do you?" she wanted to know.

"Regret it?" he asked back and upon feeling her nod against his upper chest, he continued: "Sometimes."

"Really?" she asked, sounding surprised and a little bit disappointed.

"Yes," he said. "Don't get me wrong, I like how it all turned out between us and I wouldn't change anything about that, but I still feel it was wrong to bring you here."

"Me?" she inquired confused.

"Yes, you," he chuckled before he continued, shrugging: "Don't know, it just feels wrong to rip such a young, talented, promising officer from her whole life…"

"What about your life, Jack?" she wanted to know.

He snorted. "C'mon, let's be honest, we both know I didn't have much of a life left."

She opened her mouth to oppose him when he went on: "But you had. Let's face it, Sam, you could have had so much more: you could have been promoted – you would have surely made General sometime – and you could have started a family. You could have found a nice, decent guy and marry…"

He trailed off when he managed to get jealous by his own words. He didn't _want_ her to find a nice, decent guy she would have had all chances in the world to marry while he would have had to sit on the sidelines and pretend to be happy for her, and he considered himself selfish for these thoughts.

"Maybe…" she sighed and Jack thought she sounded sad all of a sudden.

"You didn't want to marry?" he asked, fishing around for what had saddened her now.

"No," she answered. "I would have loved to marry someday. That is, if it's been the right man…"

Dimly Jack remembered she had been engaged once. Hadn't that been to this nutcase? Johnson? No, Jonas. Yup, he remembered the guy. God, Carter really had _no_ taste in men!

"I'm sure you would have found the right guy sometime," he assured her but despite the honest effort he was making he found her mood drop even further. It felt similar to a bucket of cold water being dumped on their nice, warm, comfortably settled mood.

"What about you?" she whispered suddenly.

"Me?"

"Yes," she said. "Would you have married… again?"

Jack found himself confronted with an alien concept. He had never given this much thought, he realized. In fact he had almost given up on any chance of having a steady relationship at all, so marrying was kinda out of the question anyways. Actually, the only woman he had any interest in in this way for years had been Sam and since he had had no chance of being with her like that but found himself unable to move on, he had pretty much given up and had resigned himself to loving her from afar for the rest of his life. He had been determined to watch over her, to be there for her in any way he could to assure that she was happy, knowing all the while this would be as closest to happy _he_ would probably get for the rest of _his_ life. If there would have been any chance that would allow him to marry _her_ , he was pretty sure he would have already been planning the ceremony, but unfortunately the Air Force wasn't known for changing certain regulations, so the thought of marriage had never really crossed his mind.

"I can't see myself marrying again…" he said absentmindedly when he realized she was still waiting for an answer.

"But would you have wanted to?" she continued.

Marry another woman when all he wanted was Sam? "Hell no," he grouched.

Again, he felt her slump against him and wondered what had now set her off. Why was she sad when he was the one to decide he wouldn't ever marry again?

He had just opened his mouth to ask her when a sudden light lit up their whole surroundings. Jack froze in his tracks when he saw the Stargate kawoosh to life, the wormhole's energy surging out before retreating into a stable, shimmering event horizon.

Immediately, Jack was on his feet, pulling Sam up with him. Cautiously they stepped towards the walls of the building they were hiding within and watched silently. The light coming from the Stargate was illuminating the environment in a mystical light blue but no one came out of the wormhole. It was one of their constant fears: that the SGC would finally guess the right planet or the Goa'uld would come by for another meeting or what else, but nothing happened. After a while the Stargate simply shut down.

Skeptically, Jack and Sam waited, their eyes locked on the now still Stargate but even after what felt like hours nothing had happened.

"A mistake?" Sam asked then.

Jack frowned. Somehow he had a gut feeling that this was no mistake at all. His trained instincts were ringing the alarm bells in the back of his mind quite loudly.

"Let's check it out," he suggested.

Sam nodded and together they stealthily made their way down the building and through the ruins. When they arrived at the Stargate, they searched the surroundings but with the darkness of the night it was hard to find something. So it was pure coincidence when Jack felt the tip of his boot kick something. First he thought it to be a small stone but the shape looked odd to him so he bent down and picked it up. Frowning down at the object, he called out to Sam: "Sam? Did you lose your wristwatch?"

She looked up from where she was searching the ground and answered confused: "No?"

"Well, then I just found a watch that's missing its owner."

Puzzled, Sam walked over to him. She pulled her flashlight from her belt and shone its light onto the wristwatch. Jack immediately recognized it to be one of the SGC's standard military wristwatches all SG team members had. And he recognized something else.

"That's Daniel's watch!" he exclaimed surprised.

Sam looked at him surprised. "How do you know?"

He pointed at a small tear at the side of the wristwatch's cloth. "We had a small argument because of it. Daniel said it was broken and he needed me to get him a new one. I told him it was only broken when it would stop working or wouldn't fit around his wrist anymore."

Sam nodded in understanding and Jack studied the watch with his eyes. "Do you think this is some kind of message?" he inquired.

Sam looked up to him when she said: "Yes, I do. There's something written on the side."

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"Jaffa. SGC. Help," Jack read in the light of the control room where he was currently sitting on one of the control panels, totally ignoring Sam's piqued stares at his use of the invaluable device as a chair. "Well, he certainly kept it short."

"What does this mean?" Sam asked, more thinking out loud than actually asking him.

Jack shrugged. "The only meaning I can make out of this is that the Jaffa have somehow managed to get access to the SGC. Best case scenario the SGC has already handled it somehow. Worst case scenario the Goa'uld are on their way to attack Earth through the Stargate."

Sam shook her head. "They would have never gotten around the iris in the first place."

"No?" Jack asked.

Sam huffed. "The iris is an impenetrable shield out of the strongest materials we have found off-world and on Earth!"

"Still, it isn't unfaultable, is it?" Jack questioned.

Sam shot him an irate gaze. "Have you ever seen the iris falter?"

"A few times," Jack admitted. "When it was sucked in by the black hole it got totally destroyed."

Sam snorted dryly. "Yes, but I know of no Goa'uld technology that is able to create a power like the one of a black hole. I even doubt you could control such a power."

Jack nodded while swinging his legs back and forth. "Then only when the technology failed."

Of course Sam bristled at that. She had been the one in charge of the computer programs that controlled the iris and so she felt she had to defend her work. "They don't fail!" she sulked.

Jack chuckled. "Carter, the only reason why we're still alive is because your precious iris technology failed," he informed her.

"What?" she asked confused.

He raised an eyebrow. "How do you think we got home after our abduction on P3… what was it again?"

"P3T-643?" she asked and when he nodded, she said: "Well, as far as I know we still had all our equipment so I assumed you sent our identification code through after dialing Earth and they opened the iris for us?"

"Carter, we were gone for weeks!" he reminded her. "Even if I would have remembered then to send an IDC through first, it would have been invalid by then."

She choked. "You forgot to send our ID code?"

"Half-dead, remember?" he shot back and she apologized, mumbling it under her breath.

"So how in the world did we get back?" she wanted to know.

"Because the iris' technology conveniently had some error acting up which made the iris slide back when we came through," he explained. "I don't actually remember but Daniel told me."

Sam mulled it over in her head, uncharacteristically silent and stock-still. Jack waited for a moment but when she made no move to pick up their conversation once more, he reached out and bumped his fist into her shoulder. "Carter?"

She didn't react to it and so he waved a hand up and down in front of her face. "Hello? Sam?"

Her head snapped up unexpectedly and he stepped back.

"I remember something!" she exclaimed suddenly.

"Really?"

She nodded. "I dimly remember hearing your voice. You said we were going home…"

Jack wrecked his brain until he finally found a matching memory. "Yeah, I kinda said something along those lines when we were standing in front of the event horizon on P3… whatever. I had dialed Earth and we were about to return…"

Her head bobbed rapidly in agreement. "Yes, I remember entering the wormhole. And then I remember some kind of… resistance…"

"Resistance?" he repeated.

"Yes. The memories are so vague I thought they were fragments of my nightmares but now I think this really happened!"

Jack lifted his hands when she began to speak faster with every word. "Sam, slow down! I don't understand a word. A little context would help here."

She began pacing. "I felt the resistance!" she insisted. "What could I have felt other than the iris on the other side of the wormhole?"

Jack looked at her skeptically.

"Jack, I made the resistance draw back!" she claimed. "I felt the… wall we were about to crush against and I… remember trying to get it out of our way!"

"Sounds a little bit impossible to me," he chipped in. "Can a human even make the iris do anything?"

Sam shook her head. "A normal human? No. But I have something no other human has."

Finally, Jack caught on. "Your powers?" he asked, contemplating if that could really be possible.

She nodded. "My powers are basically energy. Much like the electricity the Stargate and the iris are operating with. Actually the command the controlling computers are sending to the iris to tell it whether to open or to close would be a certain amount and sequence of electrical impulses. So if one could guess the right arrangement and sent the specific amount of energy through the wormhole, I guess you could fool the iris and make it slide back to open up because it would basically think it would receive the order from our controlling computers."

Jack gaped at her open-mouthed. "That would actually work? How come nobody ever thought of this before?!" he inquired furiously. "Almost all our enemies operate with energy weapons! And you tell me that all this time they practically had everything they needed to bypass our first and most important line of defense?!"

Sam gnawed on her lip contritely. "Well the chances to guess the exact right amount of energy and the series of electrical impulses the iris would need to open are next to zero."

" _You succeeded at the first try!_ " Jack almost shouted.

Sam nodded. "And we were incredibly lucky that worked! Really, in my state then I had no means of knowing what exactly I was doing. I would have never believed this to work…!"

"Still, it _did_ work," Jack grumbled before contemplating out loud: "But you didn't need to believe it, anyways. All it took was for this memory to be somewhere in your head."

Sam tilted her head, not understanding what he was getting at. Jack sighed, his fury leaving him. "Sam, think," he said while rubbing his temples. "If this was even _somewhere_ in your memories then Nirrti would have seen it. She would have known how to invalidate our iris."

Sam gasped before she paled noticeably, her pale skin turning almost white. "Oh my god, you're right!" she whispered.

Suddenly, her eyes swam with tears. "Oh god, I really betrayed the SGC and Earth! I gave the Goa'uld the one thing they needed so they would be able to successfully attack us!"

Cursing, Jack hopped down from the control panel and stepped up to her. "C'mere," he said while pulling her into his arms. "Sam, you didn't give the Goa'uld anything. They took a memory you had no means of knowing even existed."

"But the fact is I gave them the knowledge how to defeat the SGC," she insisted, her voice muffled against his chest.

"We don't know whether or not the SGC is defeated," he reminded her.

"Why should they sent a call for help if they weren't in a dire situation?" she shot back and to that Jack had no smart comeback.

She pulled back from him and roughly swiped the back of her hand over her nose and her cheek. "We need to help them!" she declared.

Jack wasn't surprised when she said that. He had expected it. Actually, he had been toying with this thought since the moment he had understood Daniel's message. No matter what had happened, they were still bound to the SGC and the thought of their friends in the hands of the Jaffa and the Goa'uld who could do unthinkable things to them was making Jack's stomach roll.

"Are you sure?" he asked nevertheless. "We have no means of knowing what we're walking into. We could even be too late, anyways. I'd say chances are pretty good we're signing our own death sentences by going."

And they really were. They had no valid identification codes or a GDO anymore, so it only needed for the iris to be closed and they would die. And even if the iris was miraculously open for whatever reason then they'd still be only two officers willing to face off with unknown dangers. Who knew how many Jaffa had stormed the SGC or how the whole situation on Earth had turned out by now?

Sam reached up and laid her hand against his cheek. "Could you honestly stay here and do nothing?" she inquired softly, already knowing his answer.

"No," he said, knowing it would be the same for her, too. "Just wanted to point out what we're getting ourselves into."

Sam nodded and sighing, she added: "It would end anything, wouldn't it?"

Jack looked around the control room over her head and knew what she was getting at. The moment they would leave, all chances of ever returning to Laterra would be slim at best. As would probably all possibilities they had had for a life together. Either they would succeed in freeing the SGC and then they would probably get arrested and court-martialed to end their life in some freaking prison, or they would fail and die in battle. Either way what little life they had built together on this planet would be over.

Jack tightened his arms around Sam, pulling her to him as close as possible. And he felt her reciprocate it, her arms going around his waist and holding on. He didn't want to let go of her. He didn't want to go and leave everything behind that had been between them. And still he knew unfailingly that they would do exactly that.

"I know," he said sadly.

"We'll still go?" she asked but it sounded more like a statement.

Jack sighed and buried his face in her hair, trying to burn all memories of their time together into his brain. Maybe this would be all he would ever get.

Jack felt the irrational urge to just take her and hide with her in some corner, pretending they hadn't been sucked back into the crisis. He didn't want it to end here. Just when they had worked out everything between them. Just when they had built up some semblance of a life together. Just when they had started being happy…

But it seemed as if fate was determined to not let them get any happiness.

"We'll go," he whispered. She nodded, telling him she was onboard with the decision, but he still felt the lone, single tear escape her eyes and run down her face before it dripped onto his chest. He knew she wasn't crying. Sam was strong after all. But he knew that, just like him, she was mourning what they were both about to lose: them.


	47. Returning

_**Author's notes**_ _: As usual, thank you all so much for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _And now, starting with this chapter, let the action begin..._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Seven – Returning_

Jack dropped their backpacks in the small glider. For the first time in weeks, he was completely geared up, from the black BDUs to the combat boots to the protection vest and all weapons he could strap to his body. Absentmindedly he pulled his black cap over his hair and down towards his eyes to hide as much of his face as he could before he routinely began to check his firearms. It was more of a task to keep himself busy than an actual need but he had to wait for Sam anyways and it kept him from thinking… too much.

When he was done, Jack looked around the small glider. Actually, he still found glider was too much of a big word for the small ship. It was clearly designed for only one pilot with just one seat and the controls in a U-shape around the pilot's seat. Whenever they had taken the glider onto a raid, Sam had had to stand behind him while he flew the glider and on their way back with the stolen goods, it had been hard to find space to walk and stand, but Sam still called it a glider. Maybe because a glider was the closest of a spaceship they knew that resembled the little… jumper. But unlike the bigger spaceships that still lie in wait for their repairs in the hangar, Jack was sure the glider wasn't intended for long space travels in the first place. It was more likely to be something of a recon ship that would be transported in the larger ships and used for close range exploration. Or it could be sent through the Stargate, considering its small build.

And this function of the glider was exactly what they wanted to use. Jack and Sam had long debated how they could return to the SGC and check out the situation there. They had no possibility to contact the Tok'ra or the Asgard for backup since not being with the SGC anymore had them not knowing an address where they could contact them and so they had to go themselves. Going through the Stargate when the SGC had been taken over would have been suicide though, even if Sam managed to get the iris out of their way. It was like announcing their arrival with fanfares and they were likely to be shot down before they had even set a foot on the ramp in the 'Gate room. On the other hand, while they had spaceships at the ready, flying with one of these back to Earth would take too much time considering the distance. Sam had estimated that, if she got the biggest one operative, they would still need months to reach Earth even with the Ancient's advanced technology. And time was essential given their situation.

Which was also why they had begun packing up everything the moment they had settled onto a plan. Or something resembling a plan. Jack still thought it was the most daring, reckless, holey excuse of a plan they had ever come up with, but they hadn't ever had that little information to begin with, either. So it was the best they could do in this situation. But that didn't make him any fonder of the plan. In fact there were so many unknown factors to consider they had not the slightest knowledge of that their 'plan' was mostly relying on luck. If the situation hadn't been so dire to begin with, Jack would have never agreed to such a plan. But given the little time they had and what was at stake, they really had no other choice, did they?

"Sir?" her voice said behind him, ripping him from his silent musing.

Although taken by surprise, Jack didn't let anything on on the outside and slowly turned toward her. She was such a familiar sight in her black BDUs and yet, given how informal he'd gotten to see her all those last weeks, the picture she presented with her P90 strapped to her protection vest, her grown blonde locks hidden underneath a black cap and her whole body covered by her uniform was strangely odd to him.

He looked her up and down, his eyes registering the Berretta, the zat and the various knives she carried with her. He felt strangely sad seeing her like that. He knew he should be glad she was this protected and he knew firsthand that she could handle herself well. Still he felt bizarrely reluctant to throw her into danger head-first. They had done this for years together, side by side, yet Laterra had changed much between them. He still knew Sam's abilities best and was aware she was one fine officer he trusted implicitly, if not the one he trusted most. There was almost no one he'd rather have with him in battle to watch his back and yet they had lost their completely professional distance. Now there were even more feelings involved than before and Jack hoped they wouldn't be in their way. He had already fought beforehand to only see her in the professional way the Air Force demanded of him but now? He had been granted to get to know her in a completely other way that had nothing to do with their military personas and he couldn't just push these thoughts away. For this stunt they were about to do they needed Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, yet _Jack_ and _Sam_ were also there somehow, way more present than before given their new, young relationship.

Jack stepped up to her until they stood nose to nose and reached out to push a stray strand of her hair under her cap. She closed her eyes for the split of a second and reveled in his touch. Jack had to bite down onto his cheek to not lose control and delay their departure even further. Now that they were leaving with no real prospect of ever returning to their little sanctuary, the crushing need to be with her one last time was raging through his body. He had already given in once when they had packed up everything, so he knew another time was out of the question. They needed to go.

"Ready?" he asked, his voice cracking with the tension he felt thrumming through his body. With him standing this close to her, the memories of their last time together were storming his mind. It had certainly felt every bit the farewell it had been; the farewell to their time together on Laterra as well as their farewell to their relationship, both of them knowing that their time together had come to an end with Daniel's urgent message. They had been pressed for time, so they hadn't had much time, yet in a mutual agreement they had done it slow and deliberate, both of them losing themselves in what little time was left to them and telling the other everything that went still unsaid with their bodies and actions.

Ripping himself from his memories before he was seriously thinking of picking up where they had left off, Jack anchored himself by observing her expressive face and studying her expression closely.

"Yes sir, ready to go," she confirmed, smiling up at him. Yet it wasn't the content smile he'd grown used to seeing on her over the past months, it was the smile she used when she pretended to be alright, knowing all the while he would see through it anyways but unable to let herself show her true feelings. Jack hated it. He could already feel them slip back into their work relationship and while they would need that to go into the SGC, he already missed their closeness. Suddenly all between them had gone back to being complicated. He needed her to call him 'sir' again because to make their mission work out they needed a clear hierarchy and yet he hated being back to 'sir' with her.

Jack gazed down into her light blue eyes that visibly stood out with her all-black attire. Determination shone from them. No fear and not much regret. She knew accurately what was at stake and why they had no other choice than to go.

Unable to suppress the urge, Jack leaned forwards and closed the minimal distance between them. His lips found hers for a slow, deliberate kiss with the habitual accuracy that usually came with more grown relationships. Then again, they had this thing going for years. He conveyed his whole, true feelings for her with the kiss but still kept it light. He didn't want to start something they didn't have the time to finish.

When they parted, he sought out her eyes once again. Now she looked almost sad. She had steeled herself for what had been about to come and with one simple kiss, he had managed to get her walls to crumble. Shit, he hadn't wanted to make her feel this vulnerable, he had just wanted to show her what he always failed to put into words!

Jack laid one of his hands on her cheek and slowly stroked his thumb over her skin comfortingly. He wanted to tell her so bad right now! He wanted to let her know that he loved her. She had said it to him many times until now and it always left him with a warm, comforting feeling of total acceptance which made him adore her so much more. He wanted to give that back to her. He suspected she knew by his actions but if one marriage and the following divorce had shown him anything then that simple actions alone weren't always enough. Sometimes there was no other way than to say it out loud, no matter how often he had shown his feelings with his actions.

"Sam…" he began but was interrupted immediately.

"I know," she said hoarsely.

Jack wanted to insist, wanted to tell her nonetheless, but a glance into her face left him skeptical how well she was really holding on right now. Maybe this just wasn't the time for it. Maybe he would totally destroy any military strength and relationship between them they still needed if he would get too personal right now.

He backed down, retreating from her.

"Let's go," he said instead.

Briskly, he walked the few steps to the pilot's seat and sat down, feeling Sam trail after him. He had the ship up and running with routine within seconds and only needed a thought to open the hangar's gate for them anew. Just like they had done on so many raids, he flew the glider out of the base and then willed the hangar's doors shut again. But this time, Jack hovered in the air a bit longer, using the glider's connection to the control room to shut down all systems within the base aside from the automatic defenses. He and Sam had agreed that it would be better to secure the base. In case they would survive, they would most likely be taken into custody and would have to explain themselves and neither of them wanted to give the NID any chance to raid this base. When Jack had stumbled upon the defense systems first and had activated them, they had reacted to the presence of non-Ancient humans, which had almost resulted in Sam getting shot down, so they had seen themselves forced to reprogram the systems a bit. With Sam's help, Jack had reset the system and then programmed it to ignore Jack's and Sam's specific presence but react to any and all other humans. So they would forever be the only one's able to set foot into the base without triggering the defense systems as long as the energy sources would power the defense systems.

When Jack was done, he turned the glider's nose towards the Stargate. Slowly, the small spaceship flew towards the still stony ring and from the glider's controls Jack activated the Stargate, making it dial an address he hadn't even thought of for months, even though it had been the one he had dialed most in all his years in the SGC: Earth.

The Stargate kawooshed to life, a stable event horizon forming for them. Jack lowered the glider down to the ground, hovering only inches above the earth in the air and then opened the rear door. Without saying a word, he felt Sam hop down and then saw her step up to the event horizon through the front window. She reached out towards the engaged wormhole until her palms lay flat on the event horizon. Jack knew she would have to be careful to not get sucked into the wormhole but was sure she would manage. He saw her forehead crease in concentration and asked himself for the umpteenth time if that was really going to work. He believed her explanations about the iris because, let's face it, Carter hadn't ever been wrong with such things, but that didn't automatically mean that just because she had achieved it once, she would be successful with getting the iris to slide back for them once more. From Jack's understanding it was kinda like a miracle to find the actual amount and sequence of energy impulses needed to trigger the iris to slide back so chances were high they would be failing their mission even before it had really started.

Jack waited patiently even though the minutes were ticking by. He would give her all the time she would need. In the meantime he busied himself with sending an imperceptible signal through the wormhole to keep it open for them.

Finally, after what felt like hours but had merely been twenty-four minutes going by his wristwatch, she drew back from the event horizon and jumped into the glider to come to stand behind him.

"And?" he asked while willing the door close after her entrance.

"It's done," she answered confidently. "Took me a while but I finally felt the resistance give. The iris is open."

Grimly, Jack let the glider rise into the air and then activated the cloak, which would make it invisible to the naked eye. When his order was confirmed on the control panel, he steered it toward the event horizon. "Well, then let's hope they won't close it again until we're through," he said.

They vanished into the engaged wormhole and were through before Sam had any possibility to answer.

They were greeted with the familiar blaring of the alarms in the 'Gate room. Jack's eyes were swirling around, taking everything in at once. Just like seeing Sam in full combat mode, this sight was as familiar as it felt alien after his long absence. The 'Gate room looked all the same despite the clear, dark burn spots on the walls where staff weapon blasts had detonated, the bodies of felled SF's strewn over the ground and the Jaffa warriors standing guard in front of the Stargate. Jack held his breath when he saw them confronted with roughly about two dozen Jaffa aiming their crackling staff weapons at the wormhole. Praying inwardly that their camouflage cloak wouldn't fail, Jack steered the glider out of the engaged wormhole. So far nobody seemed to have noticed them, Jack thought, when he began to raise the glider up higher. The Jaffa's eyes stayed on the engaged wormhole while Jack carefully steered the small ship through the 'Gate room. Sam looked over his shoulder when they rose high enough to see through the destroyed control room's window. Jack's eyes travelled over the Jaffa assembled in the otherwise empty control room. The control room would be the last place any SGC officer would give over willingly while still fighting. Jack knew this as well as Sam did. So seeing the room full of enemies made them realize the situation really had turned out bad for Earth.

Jack looked back to the display of his controls. They were now high enough, he realized. Now he had to trust the information his instruments were giving him and his experience as a pilot while he carefully began to steer the small glider backward. By the blue light from the wormhole beneath them, he could see them slowly gain ground and could estimate the right distance. When he could see the top of the Stargate through his front window, he moved the glider slightly to the side and then began to lower it down, right behind the engaged wormhole. While Jack worked silently and concentrated, he knew Sam would keep an eye on the Jaffa through the see-through wormhole from their side.

They had pretty much instantly agreed to take the Stargate back to Earth when they had discussed their possibilities on Laterra because it would be the fastest way. And they had both agreed on taking the small glider because it would allow them to slip into Cheyenne Mountain undetected with its cloak. But they had also both known that they couldn't really use the glider in the SGC. The doors and the hallways were too narrow to steer an invisible ship through and not alert everyone of their presence. So they had to park the glider somewhere and go on without it. The problem was where to place an invisible spaceship in a room cramped with enemy Jaffa without chancing any of them to accidentally stumble over it? Because the moment they would find the craft, they would know Jack and Sam were there and given the Jaffa's superior numbers Jack and Sam desperately needed the element of surprise or the SGC could kiss their freedom good-bye. So they certainly couldn't just leave it at the ramp and go from there. But Sam had come up with an ingenious solution in Jack's opinion. They would be parking the glider _behind_ the Stargate, using the large stony ring as a shield to hide behind.

The glider silently hit the ground behind the Stargate. Due to the narrow space behind the huge alien device Jack had had to set it down slightly askew, with the nose pointing a bit to the left and the rear to the right. Without wasting any time, Jack continued with his task immediately. Now that they had emerged out of the wormhole, he couldn't send a signal through anymore to hold it open without giving them away and so they knew it would shut down any moment. But they still needed the wormhole as a distraction. Jack opened the rear hatch with a mute thought and all the while aware that he should keep his eyes on the Jaffa on the other side, he still turned and watched Sam go. With a firm grip on her P90, she swiftly checked the surroundings and then vanished out of his sight. Jack hated this part of the plan but he had no other option than to go along anyways. He also hated knowing that.

The moment she was gone, he closed the glider's door to let it merge with their surroundings once more. He let out a relieved breath when this part had gone down well. Apparently they hadn't been noticed or shooting would have erupted already. Jack knew that, despite their invisibility, the moment he had opened the ship's door the interior had been visible to the naked eye for a moment, Sam in particular. But seemingly the Jaffa's attention had been on the wormhole firmly enough that they had missed Sam jumping out of the glider.

Jack knew that by now she would be behind the glider, shielded from the Jaffa's eyes by the invisible spaceship and that made him feel slightly better. He was aware that it only needed a Jaffa strolling around to coincidently gain a look around the ship to see her and he would probably not notice a thing before they would have shot her down unless the Jaffa walked around his front window, but again they had no other chance than to do it like that. They had agreed that they needed to get out of the 'Gate room and to one of the security rooms to be able to oversee the happenings in the SGC. They needed an overview to know what was really going on, and they couldn't do anything out of the 'Gate room. But even with their stealth, they would never succeed in toeing out of the 'Gate room filled with this much Jaffa unseen. So Sam had suggested she could make the power generators overload to cause a base-wide blackout. In the darkness ensuring they could easily slip out undetected.

And going with this plan, Sam was by now working on the electric wiring running along the walls behind the Stargate. Jack hadn't even asked for the specifics but he assumed she wanted to use the 'Gate itself and its superconductor aptitude. As far as Jack knew the controlling computers the SGC used had various security computer programs installed that ensured the Stargate couldn't overload but then again Sam had been the one who had created them and so she would be able to work around them. And if worst came to worst, she could just use her powers and short-circuit everything.

But to be able to do that, she had to be out in the open instead of within the safe glider. Jack hated that thought with vigor but he couldn't change the fact that, while he wouldn't have hesitated a second to do it like that, it wouldn't function with him going out. He had no idea what he would have to do and Sam couldn't operate the glider. So he needed to stay back, guarding her with the glider's minimal offense systems, while she worked on the Stargate's wiring.

In front of him, Jack saw the wormhole finally disengage. The Jaffa looked slightly confused but also skeptical. They obviously didn't understand or trust what had just happened. And much to Jack's horror, he saw them begin to make rounds, stalking through the 'Gate room to search for anything or anyone that could have come through the engaged wormhole they could have missed. Shit!

Holding his breath, Jack prayed they wouldn't come any closer to where Sam was. He was pretty safe in his glider, but Sam? She would be the easiest target ever the moment she would have been spotted.

Gritting his teeth, Jack readied the glider's weapons and made sure the radio clipped to his protection vest was switched on and running smoothly. The moment he would hear anything from Sam's side, he would interfere, he vowed internally. There was no way he would let those Jaffa get anywhere near Sam!


	48. Striking

_**Author's note**_ _: Again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Eight – Striking_

Sam worked fast but concentrated. She was confident their plan would work so far but she also knew this wasn't exactly the best place she was in to perform it. The very best place, of course, would have been the control room where she would have had no problems of working around the security programs but there was _no_ chance of getting there.

Meaning, Sam had to do with what they had at their disposal. Determined she tackled the fuse boxes that hung on the wall behind the Stargate and were responsible for channeling the needed energy for the Stargate. Since Sam had been the one to install the safety programs she knew best how they functioned. In case the Stargate drew too much energy and was in danger of overloading, the programs ensured that, first, the connection to the energy sources was interrupted so no further energy could go to the Stargate, and second, the superfluous energy would be redirected away from the Stargate through normally unused wiring. Sam rewired the fuse boxes so that the Stargate would receive more energy than it would need with relative ease. It wasn't an easy task but if you knew what to do and where to change what cables, then it could be done fairly easy. The fuse boxes also weren't locked, so that in cases of an emergency you could access them quickly, which worked in Sam's favor. What did turn out tricky however was working around the safety measures. Sam knew that no matter what she would do, the security programs would activate routinely the moment the Stargate would overload. She just needed to ensure that the commands the controlling computers would send, wouldn't be received and the security measures wouldn't function.

Sam hopped from fuse box to fuse box and from the wiring running along the walls to the thick cables lying on the ground behind the Stargate, changing and interrupting whatever was necessary so that the controlling computers would have no means anymore to stop what was about to happen. This task took significantly longer considering the amount of safety programs Sam had gotten up and running. She and a few of the technicians would probably be the only ones with enough oversight and knowledge to get this stunt to work, she realized idly, while reaching for her utility belt. With one of her combat knives, Sam severed a few cables that would redirect the energy flow while guiltily thinking of Sergeant Siler, who would most likely be the poor one who would have to fix her damage and get electrocuted sometime during the repairs…

Sam was ripped from her thoughts however when she heard the sound of heavy footsteps. Immediately her head shot up, her ears trying to discern the direction from where the sound was coming.

Sam crouched down, her heart racing with the sudden rush of adrenaline that was pumped through her body. Somebody was coming! Coming towards her.

Blindly, Sam reached out and felt around for the glider. When her hand bumped into its side, she quickly made her way around the glider, crawling to sit under its nose to hide from whoever was approaching.

Sam held her breath and gripped her P90, readying it for battle. Silently and carefully, she looked around the glider to see what was happening. A Jaffa had come around the Stargate and was suspiciously observing the surroundings. Guess they were slightly on edge now that they had had an incoming wormhole without someone actually coming through.

Sam shifted so she could crawl away should he look or come her way. She knew she was still somewhat safe as long as she managed to keep the invisible glider between her and the lone Jaffa. Problems would arise should he call for backup or accidentally stumble into the cloaked glider.

And then Sam noticed something else. With horror she realized she had forgotten to close one of the fuse boxes. It was still open and if the Jaffa would notice and realize it had been closed before, then they had a big problem! And just to spite her, the Jaffa's eyes locked on the fuse box that displayed its complete inner workings to the world. With a suspicious expression on his violent face, the Jaffa walked over to the fuse box and reached out a hand to lay it against the open casing to calmly inspect the damage Sam had done. Damn it all to hell and back, Sam cursed inwardly. Could he not just have overlooked it this one time?

Sam's brain raced. What to do, what to do? She needed to react and she needed to do it fast. Habitually, she had raised her weapon and pointed it at the Jaffa's back before she knew what she was doing. Gritting her teeth, Sam quickly realized that that would get her nowhere. She may get this certain Jaffa down with a shot but she would just alert the rest to her and the Colonel's presence and this would be the end of their rescue mission!

But then an idea shot through Sam's mind. Crawling back a bit, she reached for her radio and whispered into it: "Sir? If you can hear me, dial a planet! No matter which one!"

" _Carter–_ " his skeptical voice immediately argued but Sam quickly covered her radio with her jacket's sleeve to drown out any noise that would give her away and thus missed what he was saying.

"Sir, please!" she insisted quietly. "Trust me! Dial a planet!"

Sam switched the radio off to avoid getting caught and then waited anxiously. The Colonel knew what to do, anyways. Since the Stargate needed to draw energy to deplete the SGC's energy sources and to overload, they needed to dial out. And luckily, the glider allowed them to do that, even though – or actually because – the SGC lacked a DHD. If a Stargate had a DHD, the glider couldn't directly dial it but had to send the signal through the DHD. However, since the SGC didn't have a DHD, the glider could send a signal that would activate the Stargate directly, much resembling the signal Sam's dialing computers would have sent. And maybe, if the Colonel would be fast enough, they would manage to achieve the overload and the following blackout before the Jaffa could report his suspicions.

To Sam's relief she then heard the chevrons lock at the Stargate right behind her. Sam knew what was coming the moment the Stargate began to power up to create a wormhole and ducked, curling into a tight ball with her arms around her head. The Stargate almost exploded into thousands of electrical sparks, sending energy jolts all throughout the room. Sam heard Jaffa cry out when they were hit and if the crackling noise and the smell of burnt flesh was any indication then the one examining the open fuse box had received a direct hit, too. A few jolts were hitting the glider but the freely exploding energy was distraction enough that no one noticed the sparks connecting with something invisible. Sam shifted, trying to make herself as small a target as possible to avoid a hit. She knew she would be done for if this much energy would hit her spot-on. She had no healing abilities and no Goa'uld larva that could patch her up. Initially, the plan had been that she would return into the safe, protected glider and wait with Jack while the Stargate would overload and cause a blackout, but yeah, that hadn't really worked out, had it?

At least, she told herself when an electric beam hit the ground close to her feet, the Colonel was safe. If anything should happen to her, he would be able to continue the mission.

All around Sam, the lights began to falter, indicating the systems were beginning to fail. The Stargate still sizzled with energy, the wild jolts bursting out at a random because the energy didn't know anymore where to go. Sam couldn't hold back the involuntary whimper that escaped her throat. Being the mathematical genius she was, she could easily guess on the amount of energy bouncing through the room and she knew what this would do to a human body. It would only take one hit and she would get practically roasted.

Lying curled into a small ball under the glider's nose, Sam hoped the glider would be enough of a shield to spare her this fate. While she was prepared to die in battle every time she went on a mission, she really didn't _want_ to die right now. Not when she finally had something worth living for in her life…

Suddenly silence fell all around her. The Stargate all but died down, the lights went out and all the constantly blaring alarms shut up at once. All of a sudden the only thing Sam could hear anymore was her harsh breathing and the surprisingly little cries of wounded Jaffa. With slightly shaking limbs Sam sat up, warily glancing around in the complete darkness. She couldn't see a thing. But at least that meant she couldn't be hit with an overcharged electrical jolt anymore.

Sam almost jumped three foot high in the air when a hand suddenly clamped down on her shoulder. Having been caught unprepared, her hands failed to go to her P90 but she relaxed the moment she heard the Colonel's voice snap quietly next to hers: "You won't _ever_ make me do that again! Is that understood, Major?"

Sam's heart raced and jumped irregularly. God, he had surprised her! "Yes sir…" she answered habitually when her head finally caught up and told her he must have left the glider immediately when darkness had fallen over the base to search for her.

She could almost feel the tension leave him when he asked concerned: "Are you alright?"

Was she? Technically, yes. She had just been scared witless and this was not a feeling Sam Carter enjoyed no matter that that was due to happen in her line of work. "Yes sir," she answered exhausted. She already wanted this to be over…

He didn't believe her. She knew by the seconds of silence that followed her words in which he silently debated whether to call her on it or simply continue on. The mission and their lack of time won out, she realized, when he crawled out from under the glider without commenting her words. Routinely, Sam followed him, running right into his back when she stood up because she couldn't see him in the dark. Without saying something, he reached out, his hand bumping into her stomach. Sam knew what he was doing and grabbed his hand.

Taking point, he led them out of the 'Gate room, carefully circling the Jaffa they could very well identify by their cries and shouts. From time to time Jack stopped, having stumbled into a fallen body and searching for a safe way around while Sam kept an eye and ear out for approaching enemies. Sam did her best to follow the path he cleared for them and only allowed herself to exhale when she felt them finally round the blast doors. They had taken the exit that would lead into the hallways crisscrossing through Level 28 rather than the one that would have taken them to the stairs going up to the control room and would have probably made them run right into a few Jaffa.

Now they were quietly making their way through the hallways, pressed to the walls. On one hand it allowed them to orientate themselves, making them able to guess where they had to go in the total darkness and on the other hand it ensured they would be out of the way whenever a Jaffa would rush past them. Apparently they had fewer problems with seeing in the dark. Sam tried to guess how long it would take until the emergency power generators would step into the breach and bring the light back on. Given, it would only be the green emergency lights but it still wouldn't hide them as good as the total darkness did. Now they just had to squash themselves to the walls and hold their breaths, and the Jaffa would just run by. But the moment the lights would come back on, they would be clear targets. Sam hoped it would last until–

The green light of the emergency lighting came on, illuminating the base with a sickeningly green hue. Sam tensed, as well as the Colonel – she could feel it through their joined hands they held onto to not lose the other in the darkness – but thankfully there was no one around. For a moment they both orientated themselves but then the Colonel dragged her forwards in a hurry. They jogged down the corridor, hoping against all odds that they could make the last bit of their way undetected.

Finally they arrived at the emergency exit stairs that ran up all levels in case the elevator broke down. Silently, the Colonel let go of her hand then heaved the door open. He motioned for her to go first and without hesitating, Sam climbed into the narrow, dark hole. She couldn't see where she placed her hands but military training gave her enough certainty to know what she had to do by habit. Sam began climbing up the tight tube that led all the way up the levels. From the sounds she could hear the Colonel follow her and close the door, shutting out what little light there still had been. Strangely and despite the total lack of room and light, Sam felt safer here within this tube because they were finally out of sight of the Jaffa. Now they just had to climb the worth of twelve levels of stairs until they would reach Level 16 with the SGC's second command bunker.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Sam short-circuited the control room's security panel with a well-placed hit with her powers. They didn't have the time or the equipment to needle it open somehow and thus did it with brute force.

The doors cracked open a slit and the Colonel managed to pry them open enough for them to slide in before he let them fall shut again. Sam's hand went to the zat at her belt but despite standing orders the obligatory SF's weren't around and no Jaffa either. The control room was empty.

The Colonel stepped around her immediately and went towards the surveillance monitors. With quick shifting, his eyes roved over all the pictures taking in everything important. Sam came to stand next to him, studying what he was looking at. Someone had obviously managed to lock down the base in time, Sam noticed, when she took in the many, heavy blast doors that were all closed and secured tightly. The whole energy supply on Levels 8 and 9 was locked up, which would ensure nobody would be able to access it and repair the damage she had done. Sam knew the emergency battery on Level 23 could still supply the SGC with power up to twelve hours but then? They would probably run out of power altogether if no one would renounce the emergency status and get the blast doors to open again. And no power also meant no functioning air distribution systems which would essentially doom them all to suffocate in less than twelve hours…

Sam's eyes took in the sealed Levels. On Level 19 she could see many of the scientists she had worked with sit idly in their rooms or stand together in little groups. The emergency shutdown had caused several, critical levels to be bolted shut to prevent the enemy from reaching sensitive areas. Still, despite the obvious foothold Sam saw that her colleagues were somehow calm. Apparently neither had even thought of escaping via the emergency stairs up to the next level which would be open. Seemingly, they had settled to wait and sit this crisis out. Sam gritted her teeth. If she'd been there, she would have tried to escape and alert the outside world to the SGC's status, but then again she was military and almost all of her colleagues were not. Sam couldn't see a single officer there and so she wasn't surprised none of the civilians had the tactical knowledge or the courage to start one of the risky rescue missions when they most likely didn't even have an idea what was happening.

Next, Sam's eyes went to the infirmary. The doctors and nurses there were going on as if this would be a normal day and their level wouldn't be secured. They tried to uphold a certain amount of normalcy and cared for their patients as they always did. Sam was surprised when she recognized a familiar face on the surveillance tapes she wouldn't have expected in the SGC. On one of the hospital beds sat Dr. Rodney McKay. He didn't seem injured from what Sam could see. Instead, he merely seemed lost in thoughts. But what had Sam puzzled was what the man was doing here? Wasn't he supposed to be in Russia?

And then Sam's attention fell onto the briefing room. Sucking in a surprised breath she gazed stunned at the picture she was presented with. Apparently the Jaffa had herded all officers they could find in there. Sam reached forward and with a quick order to the control panel, she switched the camera's angle to get an overall view. The Colonel next to her cursed quietly while they both took in the picture. The briefing room was a downright mess. Injured officers were sitting and lying in every available space and burn marks were lining all walls. Sam recognized Teal'c leaning against a wall with his eyes closed and hoped he was only meditating. Next to him sat Janet, her whole white doctor's coat drenched with dark spots that Sam guessed to be blood. The CMO stared straight ahead, unmoving, her haunted eyes not even blinking. On Teal'c's other side sat a man in a fine suit Sam didn't know but next to this stranger was General Hammond. He was in his full Dress Blues but those had clearly seen better days. They were partially ripped and burnt, and the dark patch covering his shoulder had to be a bleeding wound. Sam didn't have to see the man's grim face to know he was in pain.

Sam let her eyes travel further and in almost every face she recognized someone from the SGC she had been familiar with. There was Colonel Dixon lying on the ground, apparently heavily wounded. One of his legs was lying at a strange angle and his face had been beaten bloody. Doctor Balinsky sat next to him and tried to stabilize him with what little he had at his disposal but it was obvious the Colonel needed to be brought to the infirmary. Colonel Reynolds sat somewhere in the middle of the room, slumped forwards and Sam guessed he was unconscious. He was leaning against one of his men's shoulders and Sam could see a wound bleed through his BDUs on his back. Not far from them she could make out SG-2 and her eyes searched for Major Ferretti, one of Jack's longtime friends. As far as Sam could tell, he wasn't harmed but the man he cared for, one of his subordinates, didn't look too good.

Sam gulped uncomfortably. She could see several civilian scientists throughout the room but most of them were uninjured. Sam recognized Doctor Bill Lee but apart from looking haunted and scared, he seemed fine. He appeared to be trying to keep Sergeant Siler awake who sat next to him. The Sergeant had a wound on his leg that was steadily bleeding onto the ground.

On the briefing table in the middle of the room lay even more heavily wounded officers and Sam almost choked at the sight of Sergeant Harriman. With the blood around him and the way he wasn't even moving a single muscle, Sam had to ask herself if he had already died.

God, what the hell had just happened? This was worse than they had imagined! Almost all officers stationed at the SGC had been incapacitated! Sam could see uncountable SF's lie dead throughout the corridors, shot down by the Jaffa. And all those who had survived were in some way injured!

Sam felt fear take hold of her stomach. They had to help them or soon they would die from their injuries, one after the other!

"Sir!" she murmured urgently.

"I know," he said grimly. His eyes were analyzing the pictures they were looking at. He was still assessing the situation and trying to get an overview, she realized.

Settling to wait for his assessment, Sam looked back to the briefing room. Suddenly, she noticed something. "I don't see Daniel…" she whispered surprised.

For a second the Colonel turned for her but instantly focused back on the monitors, his eyes searching. "Me neither," he said after a minute.

"But he has to be here!" Sam stated. "He sent us the message!"

The Colonel sighed. "Yes, he did. And what do you think the Jaffa would have done? Step aside and let him do that?"

Sam felt cold all of a sudden. Dread took hold of her stomach and squeezed it tightly. Of course the Jaffa wouldn't have just let their friend proceed. In fact they would have tried to stop him with everything they had!

Sam shut her eyes, trying to block out the conclusion her head came up with what would have happened to her brother-in-heart. One of the bodies on the ground of the 'Gate room they had stealthily made their way around could as well have been Daniel's…

"Carter?" the Colonel asked. He still called her by her surname but from the concerned voice he used, Sam knew this was rather Jack asking for her wellbeing than her Commanding Officer ensuring that his subordinate was still fit to go on.

"I'm fine," she brushed him off brusquely. Right now, she couldn't deal with that. She couldn't deal with his worry. She couldn't deal with Daniel's fate. She couldn't deal with anything. She needed to concentrate on their mission, the task at hand. There would be time to mourn Daniel later on.

Turning back for the monitors, Sam pointed at one. The Colonel followed her movement, even though Sam could read in his stubborn expression that he wasn't finished with her. He simply let her go for the moment, knowing they had far more important things to do.

"Oh, fer cryin'…!" he cursed when he realized what she was showing him.

Sadly Sam watched the familiar figure stalk through the control room as if the whole complex belonged to her. Nirrti. So it really had been her. She had been the one behind all this, the one to spell doom for Earth because of the information she had gained from Sam.

But there was also another Goa'uld with her, a man in roman-styled clothing. Sam had never seen him before but she recognized him from Nirrti's memories.

The Colonel had apparently noticed him as well because he asked: "Who's the gladiator-wannabe?"

"A minor Goa'uld named Ares. He works for Ba'al," Sam explained absentmindedly.

He looked at her irritated. "You trying to compete with Daniel's know-it-all habits?"

Sam shook her head exhausted. "I remember him from Nirrti's memories."

He winced sympathetically. "Ah, yes."

The Colonel leaned forwards and placed his hands on the control panel to study the picture of the Goa'uld closer. "There are several different Jaffa," he observed.

Sam nodded. She had picked up on the different head tattoos as well.

"So, who's all involved?" he inquired.

Sam lifted her hand and pointed while explaining: "Those with this sign belong to Nirrti but there are only few of them. She doesn't have reign over much Jaffa. These belong to Ares but since he is a minor Goa'uld this is probably just his own personal guard with him. The majorities are these ones, they belong to Ba'al, and these ones, but their sign I don't know. I kind of remember seeing the sign in Nirrti's memories but either she didn't know the owner, she didn't deem it important or she has already forgotten, but I have no idea what Goa'uld controls these Jaffa."

The Colonel nodded. "At least this is not some kind of personal little revenge trip," he concluded.

"No," Sam agreed. "With this contingent I think it's safe to say the Goa'uld High Council is involved."

"So they finally decided to sweep the annoying ants of their platter, huh?" he asked.

Sam grimaced at the image he'd used but still understood what he wanted to say. "I guess so."

The Colonel shifted and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Carter, can you show me the top side?" he asked.

Sam nodded and leaned forwards to type the command into the computers. The pictures shifted, getting replaced with those from the surveillance cameras on the surface. Neither Sam nor Jack were surprised to see that Cheyenne Mountain had been evacuated and was now surrounded by the Army. Tanks and armored cars were standing in lines of offense all around Cheyenne Mountain's entrance and heavily armed officers could be seen as spots between the cars.

"Shit," the Colonel cursed softly.

"What is happening?" Sam asked.

He raked a hand over his cap habitually without even being able to reach his hair. "When NORAD loses contact with our control rooms, the Army and the Pentagon get alerted and they sent a recon team to check out the situation. I assume the recon team didn't get very far seeing that the whole base is under complete lockdown and so they would have expected an alien foothold situation."

The grim look on his face left her slightly shivering. "What's the SOP for this situation?" she asked.

He snorted. "Given that we're front lines and what we're dealing with? They won't risk anything."

"And this means?" she inquired, almost dreading what she was going to hear.

He looked her in the eyes but his gaze was void of any emotions. For the first time in weeks she was greeted with his blank poker face once more. "They will bombard the SGC."

"… _What?"_ Sam exclaimed, knowing she sounded absolutely incredulous. "Bombard…?"

Jack nodded, his gaze still all blank black-ops soldier. "The army will not risk anything," he repeated. "They will evacuate whatever they can and then throw a nice little A-bomb down the access shaft that connects the 'Gate room to the surface and simply wipe out every threat."

Sam paled. "But…! What about the SGC? All officers and civilians still in here…?"

Jack shrugged. "Collateral damage."

Sam had a hard time coming clear with that. Yes, her military side told her that was the most rational solution to the problem; the solution even that would cost the least lives and would be most successful. Still, having worked here herself for years and knowing all these outstanding officers and civilian doctors that worked here, giving their all to protect Earth, firsthand made her want to punch something in frustration. It was so unfair! They were still fighting! They were still fighting against the threat, trying to defend their home world and the Army would blow them all up without a second thought!

"Is there anything we can do?" she asked, her brain already racing to find a solution.

"Well, the moment a high ranking officer of the SGC would establish contact with the surface and tell them the situation's under control, all advances against the SGC would be halted," he answered.

Halted, she thought. Not aborted, but at least halted.

"I could open a channel and you could talk to them," Sam suggested.

The Colonel shook his head. "Carter, at the least we're marked MIA, if not _deserted_. Nobody up there will trust _my_ word, even if they would believe it's really us down here."

Damn it all, he was right, she thought frustrated.

"So we need someone from the SGC to call up?"

He nodded. "Hammond or Reynolds would be best," he summed it up. "Dixon and Ferretti would also work. Or Harriman. Someone those at the surface have had frequent contact with."

"So we need to free them first?" Sam asked.

Again, the Colonel nodded. "Yes. And hope we're not too late already."

Sam almost rolled her eyes. Why was it that they could never just deal with one crisis at a time? Not enough that the SGC had been overrun by Jaffa, no, now they also had to worry about an atomic bomb that could drop on their heads anytime…

Sam gnawed on her lower lip, thinking things through. What could they do? How could they achieve what they needed to do?

Then she sighed. "We need to go down again, don't we?" she said.

"Most likely," the Colonel agreed. "Party's going on down there."

Sam nodded. "We can get down the same way we came here: through the emergency stairs," she suggested. "I don't think the elevator's a safe choice."

"Probably not," the Colonel stated. "And when we're on Level 28, we should probably activate the base's self-destruct as well."

Sam nodded. This was SOP. The self-destruct could still function with the emergency powering, being one of the SGC's main defense systems. And despite the fact that there was an atomic bomb hanging over their heads, one could never know what was going to happen, so the self-destruct would be a safe option. Actually, Sam was astonished it hadn't been set yet. Or maybe it had and the Goa'uld had forced the SGC to terminate the countdown somehow. But Sam was also aware that it wouldn't be all that easy to set the self-destruct. She and Jack had been locked out of the system, meaning their personal identification codes wouldn't activate it anymore, but maybe she could work around them somehow and still get it running.

"And then? What do we do?" the Colonel asked.

Sam took a moment to think their options through before turning for him. "There are several possibilities," she explained. "First, we could simply wait for the self-destruct to go off."

The Colonel raised a brow astonished. "Well, forgive me Major, but I'm not really fond of dying yet."

"Me neither, sir," she admitted. "But we would have to guard the self-destruct so it couldn't be aborted, meaning we would have no other choice than to die."

"Any other option?"

"We could try to attack the Goa'uld," Sam said. "Maybe free the officers in the briefing room so they could help."

The second eyebrow joined the first at his hairline. "Carter, did you watch the surveillance tapes? None of our men is in the shape to fight and there are… what… hundreds of Jaffa strolling through the SGC aside from the two Goa'uld we would have to deal with!"

Sam estimated it to be a little less Jaffa but the fact that they were severely outnumbered didn't really change with that. The Goa'uld alone would be a challenge for them and they needed to somehow get rid of the Jaffa first so they could concentrate on the two Goa'uld.

Sam gnawed on her lower lip in deep thought. The Jaffa were superior to humans in almost every way. Whatever they could do to harm the Jaffa would get to their own men long before the Jaffa would be affected. With one exception.

"Sir, before we… fled… my dad approached me with some recent experiments the Tok'ra were doing. They were about to create a poison that works on Goa'uld symbiotes," Sam said slowly.

"Oh?" he said. "How come I don't know anything about that?"

"It wasn't really working until then," Sam answered. "He wanted my opinion on something and when the Tok'ra would have finished the poison, Dad would have come to brief you and General Hammond on it."

"I see… So, how exactly does a not-really-finished poison help us in our situation?" he inquired sarcastically.

"It wasn't finished when we deserted," she emphasized. "That was six months ago. I'd say the Tok'ra had all the time in the world to finish the poison."

"And then it would still be with the Tok'ra and not be any help for us, wouldn't it?"

"Not necessarily," she answered back. "What if the Tok'ra would have come already to brief General Hammond? The SGC would have continued with their operations normally after we left and so they would have probably worked with the Tok'ra sometime. And if the Tok'ra have already briefed the SGC on the poison, then they would have left a sample for us."

"Carter, that's pretty farfetched, isn't it?" the Colonel asked skeptically.

"No sir, I don't think so," she said before pointing to the control room's keyboards. "I could do a database search to see if the poison's here."

The Colonel looked highly disbelieving but still nodded. Sam sat down and immediately her fingers flew over the keyboard. She was locked out of all systems but it didn't take her long to crack Daniel's account and used it to navigate through the systems.

"Danny-boy's account?" the Colonel smirked behind her. "Nice work, Carter."

Sam tilted her head noncommittal, telling him she was listening, but her concentration was on the task at hand. With quick switches she sifted through the SGC's large database, keyword-searching for what she was looking for.

"Got it," she said suddenly, pulling up the picture of a blue shimmering liquid in a highly secured test tube.

"That's all?" the Colonel asked disappointed at seeing the small amount.

Sam shook her head. "This is just a sample they used for examinations."

"Where?" he wanted to know.

Sam scrolled through the information on the poison. "Level 19," she answered. "They had me listed for the experiments but since I wasn't… available, they gave the project over to Dr. Lee. But going by the data he has collected, the poison is working."

Sam licked her lips before continuing: "Actually, here's a note that Daniel and Dad wanted to go on an undercover mission with this poison but it has been postponed for some reason…"

"Something to do with the poison?" the Colonel asked.

Again, Sam shook her head. "No, I think the Tok'ra delayed it. As far as I can tell, they wanted to use the poison at a gathering of the Goa'uld High Council but the meeting was postponed. I assume the High Council is fighting for territories now that we got rid of Apophis and Cronus. Maybe the gathering was even postponed because a few Goa'uld wanted to get rid of the Tau'ri first to strengthen their positions within the High Council…"

"Lucky us. We're fought for," the Colonel stated dryly.

Sam ignored his sarcasm for the time being. "But, fact is, the poison is here, at the SGC."

"But can we use it?" Jack inquired.

"Well, it's harmless to humans. It's only lethal to Jaffa, Goa'uld and Tok'ra, because it attacks the symbiote," Sam answered.

"So it would kill Teal'c as well?"

Sam closed her eyes in dread. Teal'c…! Thinking of her friend hurt when she became aware what she had been considering, totally forgetting about him.

"Yes sir," she confirmed with a decidedly bad conscience. "I'm sorry sir, I shouldn't have suggested it."

His hand came to lie on her shoulder and his voice was grave when he said: "Nothing to apologize for, Carter. The poison isn't ruled out yet."

She shot around, looking at him dumbfounded. "No?"

She would have betted anything that he wouldn't ever consider something that could harm their friend!

"We have to be realistic," he reminded her. "It's only one life and it would safe thousands of others, our planet included, if we would use the poison."

"But… _Jack!_ " Sam said baffled. "It's Teal'c! He's our friend!"

"You think I _like_ to do that?" he barked at her.

Upon seeing his fury and the hurt he was feeling at what they might need to do, she backed down immediately. "No sir. Sorry, sir."

"Gimme something else, Carter, some other solution, and I'll gladly do that," he said, considerably softer.

Sam wished she could. She really did. Unfortunately the poison was their best choice because it would significantly even out the odds against them.

"I can't, sir," she said dejectedly the moment a risky idea shot into her mind. "But maybe we could, well, spare Teal'c…"

"Care to elaborate, Carter?" he asked.

Sam ran through her thought again trying to see if there was something she wasn't thinking of. Slowly, she began to explain: "We could distribute the poison through the air ventilation. I could temporarily cut off Level 28 from the air supply and test on the other levels how much of the poison is needed to kill a Jaffa. Maybe I could determine how much we will have to use on Level 28 to just make them… sick. Or lethargic. We could incapacitate any backup that's within the SGC and then weaken the Jaffa on Level 28. Then we could take them out with our zats. If this works out, Teal'c wouldn't be permanently harmed."

"But he'd be temporarily harmed?" the Colonel wanted to know.

"He would feel the effects as all the other Jaffa, so yes."

"What about the Goa'uld?"

Sam calculated. "Well, since their symbiotes are all grown up and in full possession of their abilities, I'd say with the amount we would need to weaken the Jaffa, they wouldn't really be affected."

"So we would still have to fight them," he summed it up.

"Yes, but at least _only_ them."

He sighed. "I guess that's the best we can come up with?"

"Given our situation, the little time we have, the superior numbers of Jaffa, the alien foothold situation and the impending A-bomb? Yes, I can't think of any other option to right it all in time," Sam confirmed.

"Alright," the Colonel decided. "What do you need for this to work?"

Sam motioned toward the control panels in front of her. "I can access the air ventilation from here and we have the surveillance tapes here to confirm the results, so we can take out the Jaffa from here. But first I will have to go down to Level 19 and get the poison. Then we need to go to Level 10 to get the poison into the air distribution system. And when we've successfully cleared the other levels of the Jaffa, we can climb down to Level 28, set the self-destruct and take out the Jaffa with the rest of the poison."

"And then it's some good ol' hand-to-hand with the Goa'uld?"

Sam nodded.

The Colonel grinned. "Can't wait for that!" he exclaimed before he grew serious again: "Then let's go down to Level 19."

"We?" Sam asked astonished.

He turned for her, raising an eyebrow, silently asking her what else she had thought they were going to do.

"Sir, I could go alone," Sam suggested. "In case I fail, you would have the better abilities and chances to stop the catastrophe from happening than I would have."

The Colonel actually rolled his eyes before reaching out for her. Again, he laid a hand on her shoulder, the warmth of his calloused palm a very comfortable reassurance. He stepped up to her until his chest brushed hers with their breathing and quietly, he said: "Sam, I do trust your abilities. But there is _no_ way I would let you go anywhere alone right now!"

Sam shuddered under his intense gaze. She knew what he meant. They were the SGC's last line of defense and they would do their job with their usual accuracy. Still, he hadn't completely left behind what had happened between them on Laterra. He knew she didn't need it, knew that she was capable on her own, still he couldn't help the feeling that he wanted to protect her. Sam knew it was not because she was a woman, it was just Jack's personality. As he had said, he protected what was important to him. And Sam was happy that he had finally included her to those people he felt he had every right to defend openly. They now belonged together. And this thought left Sam with a deep contentment, despite their desperate situation.

"Okay," she agreed. "Let's go."


	49. Readying

_**Author's notes**_ _: Thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _And to the guest who asked a few questions regarding the last chapter: the emergency battery powers all important areas and seeing how the SGC functions, this means_ first of all _all computers. The computers operate all necessary devices and programs, from the defense systems to the air distribution so they would have to run first. But since it's only an emergency battery that doesn't have the same power as the main systems, they need to save energy wherever possible, and one of those points would be the light. They don't have to light up the whole SGC, the emergency lights would be enough to find the way around. This is why the computers are working despite only the emergency lighting. It's like that in the original series, too.  
Also in the original series: the Tok'ra do invent the symbiote poison, fully knowing it's a threat to them, too._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Forty-Nine – Readying_

Jack waited for Sam to catch up with him, hovering in the dark, narrow space of the emergency stair's tube. With one hand at their escape hatch that had L-19 painted in large letters on the inside, he fumbled his flashlight back into his protection vest. Sam climbed down to him in the meanwhile and together the space was getting cramped immediately. Jack would have enjoyed the way her body was pressed against his but right now they really had other problems.

Jack opened the hatch and climbed out of it the best he could while having to go around Sam. He had merely set a foot on Level 19's hallway when he saw something large swing at him from the corner of his eyes. Jack reacted automatically and raised his arms, his hands going out to block the object flying at him. With an audible _clang_ Jack felt the something connect with his palms and despite the fact that he stopped the object before it could hit his head, the pain was quite something.

Cursing colorfully, Jack ripped the object towards him and feeling it give, he threw it into a corner, far away from him.

Sam came out of the tube behind him and shone her flashlight over the surroundings. "Sir…?" she asked confused.

Jack looked at the thing he had thrown across the hallway and identified it to be a portable fire extinguisher. Someone had attacked him with a fire extinguisher!

Jack whirled around and his eyes bored into the person standing a few feet away, gaping at him and Sam with round eyes. Sam lifted her flashlight and together with the green light of the emergency lighting, Jack saw…

"FELGER!" he bellowed furious.

The doctor winced and cried out in relief at the same time. "Colonel O'Neill! Major Carter!" he shouted overjoyed. Further down the corridor, Jack could see various scientists peek out of their labs curiously.

" _Of course!_ " Jack tore into the scientist angrily. "Who did you think would come?!"

"Um… you have to admit the Jaffa would have been more likely…" Felger defended himself.

"The Jaffa don't know about these stairs!" Jack growled. At least he thought they didn't. Unless Nirrti knew of them by seeing them in Sam's memory. But the fact that they could still use them undetected told him Nirrti didn't know.

Felger ignored his rage. Tears shimmered in the scatterbrained scientist's eyes when he threw out his arms, announcing: "Oh my god, it's so good to see you again! I… I mean, we… the SGC… we really missed you! And you couldn't have chosen a better time to return! Okay, maybe it would have been better if you had already returned yesterday. Or the day before that. But at least you're here! And SG-1 can save the day again!"

Jack cautiously did a step back when the doctor advanced on him with his arms extended. "Felger, I swear…! If you're even _thinking_ of embracing me…!" he threatened darkly.

The scientist's face fell but he wasn't one to get discouraged easily. "I understand, Colonel," he nodded. "But at least, Major Carter won't mind, would she?"

Before his poor Major had any chance to react, Felger had thrown himself at her and going by the muffled, surprised little yelp she did, Jack knew she did, indeed, mind. And Jack needed all his Special Forces training to not go berserk on the other man clutching onto his… girlfriend. It still sounded weird to call Carter his girlfriend, because their relationship was simply so much more, but yeah, she was essentially that.

Hauling the other man away from her by his collar, Jack snarled testily: "Felger, we don't have time for that now!"

From the corner of his eyes, Jack saw Sam step closer to him. He knew she somehow liked her scientist colleague, even if Felger had the tendency to go on her (and everyone else's) nerves pretty quick. Sam thought he had potential and that was almost the only reason why the good Doctor was still with the SGC, seeing that Jack himself and General Hammond as well were thoroughly fed up with the man's constant failures. And given, Jack had never been fond of the adoring gazes Felger shot his 2IC on a regular basis with her never noticing a thing, or the way the scientist would begin drooling so obviously whenever he saw Carter. That still didn't mean she enjoyed the other man being this clingy with her.

"Of course Colonel, I understand," Felger agreed immediately, even though Jack was pretty sure he had missed the whole point. But then again, it wouldn't do that he would give them away to the first person they'd met at the SGC when they needed to stay inconspicuous.

"What do you need me for?" Felger asked.

" _You?_ " Jack echoed flabbergasted. "Why do you think we would need you of all people?"

Sam cut in smoothly before Felger could feel hurt by his words. "We need something Dr. Lee was working at," she explained. "The symbiote poison."

Seeing that Dr. Lee was held in the briefing room, Jack thought Sam was probably hoping someone else from Level 19 could help them out. Normally she would have been the one in charge of all the scientists and the projects performed on Level 19 and would have known, but the moment she had deserted Jack estimated this position had gone over to Lee as well. And Lee had gotten himself captured by the Jaffa. So Sam most likely hoped some scientist could show her the poison and she would figure its use out on her own.

Felger nodded to her words. "Oh, I know what you're talking about," he said. "I assisted Dr. Lee in studying it."

Sam's expression positively lit up, pleased by those words, and Jack could almost see Felger melt into a puddle at being confronted with this much Carter-attention.

"Of course…" Jack grouched grumpily, cursing his bad luck. Now he would be stuck with Carter and Felger technobabbling with each other while the other doctor would drool over _his_ woman and Jack could do nothing but kick a wall in frustration. Hurting Felger wouldn't do until Sam had gotten all information she needed from him (and then they would have more important things to do) and trust his 2IC to remain completely oblivious to any man practically falling over his own feet at her sight…

Following Sam and Felger to Doctor Lee's lab, Jack listened listlessly to the Doctor's reports on the poison and the experiments he and Lee had done.

"Isn't it nice to be back…" Jack grumbled under his breath in a foul mood.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"Carter? I'm there," Jack reported, keying the button of his radio while he stealthily slipped out of the emergency stairs' tube.

" _Got you on the cameras, sir,_ " her voice answered immediately and turning, Jack did a sloppy salute over to the surveillance camera hanging in the corner of a wall.

Upon retrieving the symbiote poison and getting Felger finally off of Carter, they had made their way up the emergency stairs once more. Carter had left at Level 16, returning to the secondary control room so she could oversee what was happening around the base and just as they had agreed, he had climbed up to Level 11 where he had to leave the emergency staircase as it ended there. On Level 11 was one of the major security checkpoints since there was the entrance into the heart of the SGC and normally, Jack would have had no chance of circumventing the security checkpoint, but thanks to the foothold situation and the subsequent base-wide evacuation the checkpoint was deserted. Heavy blast doors on the end of Level 11 denied him (and everything else for that matter) to go any further up and Jack was pretty sure the Special Forces up there had cut off the second elevator from the power so that nothing from the SGC could get up to the outside world, but Jack wasn't overly concerned about that. He knew his way around the SGC better than anyone else. With a bit of artistic climbing, he accessed the air ventilation shaft of Level 11 and crawling on his stomach, he made his way up until he reached Level 10 where he dropped out of the narrow tube. Knowing that now Carter would keep an eye out for him and would warn him should he run into any wayward Jaffa, Jack jogged down the corridors. He kept a hand on his P90 but actually Jack wasn't that worried. The last time they had checked, no Jaffa had come any higher than Level 16, so Carter was probably in more danger than he was. Hm, what a reassuring thought.

Stealthily making his way down the corridor, he made Carter lead him until he finally arrived at the end of a corridor with another set of closed blast doors that barricaded his way. Jack laid a hand on the thick steel doors, feeling the cold metal under his fingers that peeked out of his fingerless gloves. He knew that behind these doors would be the air ventilation, distribution and purifying systems, one of the most essential parts of the SGC.

"Carter, can you open the doors?" he asked into his radio.

Concentrated silence was all answer he got but by now Jack knew better than to prompt her when she was surely already working on the task.

" _Difficult, sir,_ " she admitted after a while and by the sound of it, he imagined her gnawing on her lower lip yet again. " _I'm locked out of the system and Daniel's account doesn't allow me the access I'd need. And even if I manage to get in somehow, I would have to shut down the security programs at this specific point while somehow leaving all others in place…_ "

Jack knew what she was getting at. She couldn't simply disable all currently running security programs because that would allow the Jaffa and the Goa'uld access to parts of the base that were right now shut down and protected from them, like Level 19 and the infirmary.

"Carter, _can_ you do it?" he asked.

" _I don't think so, sir,_ " she grumbled, hating to admit defeat. " _Not with what little time we have._ "

He nodded. "Okay, so what do I have to do to get in there?"

Again there was silence for a moment and again, Jack waited for her to go through all possibilities they had in her head.

" _Well sir, I think the best chances we have are to get the blast doors to… malfunction,_ " she said.

Jack raised an eyebrow while looking over his shoulder towards the surveillance camera so she could see. "Malfunction?" he asked skeptically. "How do I make a _door_ malfunction?"

" _Well, pretty much like we did it with the Stargate,_ " she answered confidently. " _All security programs send electrical impulses through the wiring system to get the doors to close and lock down in the case of an emergency. If I would try to open them from here, I could only get either_ all _doors to open up or maybe only those on the same level. But you could probably make the wiring short-circuit so that the specific door we need to open up won't receive any orders from the security programs anymore_."

Jack sighed almost fondly at her technobabble. Yep, there simply was no better way to be reminded that they had really returned and were operating once again than getting confused by what she still claimed to be simple English.

"And this will get the door to open up?" he asked.

"… _Most likely…_ " she answered, slightly insecure.

"Most likely?" he echoed. "Carter!"

" _Well, it can cause two possible outcomes,_ " she explained. " _Either the door will open or it will stay closed and we have no means to get it open anymore without a huge, honkin' flame cutter._ "

For a moment Jack was placated when he heard her use his words. It was seriously hot to hear how he was rubbing off on her! But then his mind returned to the task at hand. "How are the odds?" he asked, hoping she had just informed him to be thorough.

" _Fifty-fifty, I'd say,_ " she answered.

"Fifty-fifty, Carter?" he grumbled displeased. "So chances are pretty good I could screw up the only possibility we thought of to rescue the whole base?"

Again silence, until: " _Yes, sir._ "

He rubbed his temples exasperated. "Can't you just try to get all doors to open on Level 10? I don't think any Jaffa will come up here and give a shit about that!"

" _Well, with enough time I certainly could,_ " she answered and Jack already saw what the problem would be.

"We don't have that time, do we?"

" _If I'd be able to access all system freely, then we would,_ " she said. " _But since I am locked out, it would take considerably longer._ "

Jack sighed, instantly understanding what she was talking about. Carter had set up all those security programs and knowing the way she usually worked, Jack was sure that nobody who was locked out would ever get back into the system, apart from her. She would have known how to prevent that, and if anything, then Carter was thorough. But even for her, it would take quite a lot of effort to bypass her own security measures and for that she would need time. Lots of time. Time they didn't have, right now.

"Okay, Carter," he said defeated. "What do I need to do?"

" _See the control panel next to the blast doors?_ " she inquired.

He nodded, trusting that she would see it through the surveillance cameras.

" _Get it loose,_ " she instructed. " _The wiring will be behind it._ "

Jack didn't go at it any gently or considerate. With his sheer strength, he brutally ripped the panel from the wall.

"Okay," he reported when the panel hung loosely in his hands, all kinds of cables emerging from the hole in the wall. "Next?"

Slowly, Sam explained what cables he had to switch or connect so the operating panel would short-circuit and Jack knew it had worked when suddenly electrical sparks erupted all around his hands. Jack dropped the operating panel immediately and it fell against the wall, sizzling with the energy before it abruptly died. Jack waited for a moment, actually holding his breath until the blast doors he stood in front of opened.

"Yes!" he hissed silently, glad that, for once, luck was on their side.

Hurriedly, Jack stepped in, already reaching for his tactical vest to take out the vial with the symbiote poison. He looked around the room, his eyes taking in the huge machines that were responsible for bringing air down to all the levels of Cheyenne Mountain, sucking it back up and purifying it.

"So, Carter…" he drawled, looking around the room that held the SGC's air ventilation system. "You're the one with the plans. Where do I have to go?"

She directed him to the needed machines and then explained how he could access them. Jack followed her instructions carefully. After all it wouldn't help them if he would accidentally destroy the SGC's air circulation system…

"Okay," he finally reported back. "I think I've got it. Now what? I just fill in the poison…?"

" _More or less, yes sir,_ " Carter answered concentrated. " _The air ventilation system will pull it down with the air and distribute it all throughout the base. But remember to keep a seventh of the poison back. We will need that for Level 28._ "

Jack looked blankly at the vial he was holding in his hand. The poison was of an almost sickeningly, blinding neon-blue, illuminating his hand like a light source. How the hell was he supposed to know what a seventh of this liquid, gas or whatever it actually was would be? The vial wasn't even that big to begin with!

Shrugging, Jack went onto the task, figuring that his guestimate would have to do. Measuring out a seventh with his eyes, he poured what he estimated to be the remaining rest into the air ventilation system and watched as the air sucked it down the Mountain almost instantly. Carefully, Jack closed the vial and stuck it back into his tactical vest before he left the room to head back down to Level 16 where Carter would wait for him.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"So?" Jack asked when he finally reached Level 16, slowly rolling his shoulders when he emerged from the emergency stairs tube. The whole climbing was beginning to set his shoulders afire with pain. And if Jack had to guess, he would have believed his thighs to not be far behind, either.

Carter waited for him in front of the tube, smiling widely. "A complete success," she reported. "The poison works even stronger than we anticipated. All Jaffa within the SGC, aside from Level 28, are dead. They've fallen in the split of a second."

Jack nodded. "That's good news."

Sam did a vague movement in agreement but then cautioned: "We'll have to be careful though or we will hurt Teal'c."

"Yeah," Jack agreed.

Together they made their way down to Level 28, once more using the emergency stairs. When they finally arrived, both of them, as well as their bodies, were thoroughly fed up with the climbing and they both hoped they wouldn't have to go up another time.

Stealthily they made their way through the deserted hallways that were lit with the green emergency lights. Once or twice they almost ran into a Jaffa patrol and could just escape into a storage room at the last second to hide. They passed the room that held the self-destruct and took a minute to debate whether or not they would try to get it to activate. Sam explained about their lack of any activation codes and keys and finally, they decided they didn't have the time to spare to try their luck. Jaffa could run into them at any second and if they wanted to get the upper hand, they needed the element of surprise. So they continued on, silently making their way forward until they were as close to the 'Gate room as they dared to get. By now they only communicated by hand signs to avoid creating any sounds that could give them away.

Wordlessly Jack handed Sam the vial with the symbiote poison and then ordered her to spill it. She took a moment to do the math in her head how much they would actually need and then released what looked to be about half of the amount left in the vial into the air. Holding their breaths more out of tension than the actual need to do so because of the poison, they waited for any reaction.

It didn't take long until painful groans filtered over to them, signaling that they were on the right way. Sam stashed the vial away and instead drew her zat. Jack's was already placed firmly in his right hand and together they jogged over to the 'Gate room. Taking position left and right next to the destroyed blast doors, they aimed and one after the other, shot down all Jaffa in the 'Gate room. None of them put up a fight, they were all too preoccupied with the pain they were experiencing and so they went down, their heavy bodies falling onto the ground with audible _thumps_. Jack could see that Sam tried to go for unconscious but with the rapid firing they did, neither of them could know if a few Jaffa weren't hit with more than one shot in the crossfire.

Finally, there was complete silence in the 'Gate room. No Jaffa stood anymore. Instead the ground was littered with unmoving bodies. Jack found he didn't care all that much. This was war, after all. And none of these Jaffa had hesitated to shoot down his friends and fellow coworkers.

Silently, he signaled Carter to follow him and they retreated, running down the corridors again. Whatever Jaffa they met on their way went down under the shots of their zats before they had any chance to catch on or react to their presence. Jack and Sam made their way up to the General's office, purposefully avoiding the control room where they guessed the Goa'uld to be, trying to get a hold of the chaos that had erupted. Weapons at the ready, they reached the General's office. Mildly surprised Jack observed the bodies littering the ground in front of the opened office door. He wasn't astonished at the sight of the Jaffa, even though it was amazing that the SGC had managed to fell this much when they had gotten overrun. But he was seriously at a loss at the sight of the heavily armed men in the black suits that lay on the ground unmoving. Who the hell were they? They certainly hadn't belonged to the SGC the last time he had been around. NID maybe?

Jack shrugged it off, concentrating on the task at hand. With Sam closely behind him, he stormed into the office, only to find it utterly empty. Crouching down to go unseen from the briefing room, they made their way over to the door that led into the briefing room. It was closed but not locked. From the other side various groans and moans could be heard, mostly Jaffa, but Jack thought there to be the occasional human outcry in between, too.

Wordlessly Jack counted down with his fingers and on three, he threw the door open, careful to stay down so he wouldn't get in the way of his 2IC. Carter started shooting immediately and the first Jaffa went down before Jack could join in the fire.

Only seconds later an awful silence filled the room. Jack straightened and ran his eyes over the crowded room. The eyes of all people still conscious were trained on them, looking at them as if they were a hallucination. Jack took a second to observe, his eyes assessing the situation and the state his friends were in. He could see General Hammond who smiled at them relieved but stayed rooted to the ground. Reynolds, Siler, Dixon, the Napoleonic power monger and several others looked at him with various expressions of relief and pain in their faces, telling Jack that they were as glad to see them as they wouldn't be able to help them in any way.

Jack didn't wait for them to catch on what had happened. They didn't have the time to linger and answer the questions that would undoubtedly come. Any moment the Goa'uld could come to check out what had happened and Jack didn't want the fight to ensue where so many injured were in the way. He signaled Carter with a hand sign and was relieved to find her following him immediately when he began to make his way through the room. He kept a close eye on her and when he noticed her pulling her firearm from its sheath at her thigh to hand it over to Ferretti together with a spare magazine, he didn't comment on it. Instead he took a leaf out of her book and threw his Berretta at a stunned Major before he handed his combat knife over to a Captain who sat in his way. But this would have to do, he decided. All other weapons they would still need, so Jack hoped what they had given them was enough to get them to free themselves and reach the armory here on Level 28. They had taken down whatever Jaffa had been in their way but there was no telling if there were still a few of them running around somewhere.

In by-passing, Jack shot a quick gaze at Teal'c. The large Jaffa still sat unmoving next to General Hammond, his eyes closed. Either he was unconscious or already dead, Jack had no means of knowing, but at least his friend didn't seem to suffer from the effects of the symbiote poison.

Jack averted his eyes and concentrated. Now they were getting to the hardest part.

With Carter right behind him he stomped for the stairs going down into the control room. Upon reaching the stairs, Jack took lead once more and slowly, they made their way down. From the control room, they could hear similar pain-filled groans float up to them that told Jack two things. First, the poison was a very effective weapon and secondly, Carter really was a math genius for being able to find the right amount to weaken them but not kill them.

The moment they had a clear sight of the enemy, Jack and Sam started firing. They zatted down all Jaffa before they realized they were being attacked.

But when they lastly stepped down from the stairs, the control room was eerily silent. Jack trailed his eyes over the fallen figures of almost a dozen Jaffa but he found no Goa'uld with them. Stepping up to the window overlooking the 'Gate room, Jack noticed that the two Goa'uld were down there, stepping through the rows of unconscious Jaffa, trying to figure out what had happened. They were the only figures still standing upright and strong, their evil spirits unbroken. Jack looked down at them, feeling the bile rise in his throat at the hated sight of Nirrti, who was stalking through the room as if Cheyenne Mountain belonged to her. Without a word, Jack turned and stormed for the stairs, Carter at his heels.

With their weapons raised, they quickly made their way into the 'Gate room to confront the Goa'uld. Vaguely, Jack noticed the irony of the situation. They had made such efforts to be able to leave the 'Gate room undetected only to return there to fight their enemies. It seemed as if after all it was destined to end where it had all begun: the 'Gate room, in front of the Stargate. And end it would, Jack was sure of it. One way or another.

* * *

 _A/N: Little random rambling: I love Felger! He's so funny! So I couldn't resist writing him into a little scene…_


	50. Battling

_**Author's notes**_ _: Again thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _And I just realized that we have only a few chapters left. Soon, we'll be done…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty – Battling_

" _Colonel O'Neill. Major Carter,_ " Nirrti acknowledged them calmly when the two officers stepped into the 'Gate room, weapons firmly pointed at the two Goa'uld who turned at their arrival.

" _I knew we would see each other again sooner or later,_ " the Goa'uld scientist said.

Jack felt Carter next to him tense up when she was confronted with the loathed face and voice of the Goa'uld that had held her prison in her own body, but to her credit she didn't show any outward signs of being uncomfortable. Her weapon still fixed the male Goa'uld hovering slightly in the background while Jack targeted Nirrti. Jack only knew of her discomfort because he knew Carter that well to see the little, almost nonexistent signs.

"Yeah… I would've said it's a pleasure, but y'know, I've been taught not to lie," Jack drawled, his attention focused on Nirrti.

From his peripheral vision, he could see the corner of Carter's mouth lift when she tried to suppress the smile at his joke and instantly Jack felt better. Nirrti didn't comment his sarcasm in any way visible but Jack could see the male Goa'uld bristle at what he probably deemed an affront. Which, by all means, it hadn't been. It had been an insult.

" _So I assume it was you who activated the Chaapa'ai earlier?_ " Nirrti speculated in what could almost be described as curiosity. " _Interesting._ _How did you get by my Jaffa?_ "

Jack had not the slightest intention of telling her. If by now her Jaffa hadn't stumbled upon the invisible glider, then Jack also wasn't inclined to tell her of it. What did they think of him? That he was to reveal a tactical advantage to the enemy? Nobody was that stupid!

So, completely ignoring Nirrti's question, Jack countered: " _Your_ Jaffa? Sorry, didn't know Goa'uld went by several symbols nowadays. Or do my eyes get bad already? Because I could have sworn I've seen different symbols on their foreheads?"

" _I have command over them,_ " Nirrti stated frostily. Which, Jack thought wryly, translated roughly as 'they're not mine, but I'm allowed to temporarily use them'.

"I see," he said, grinning slightly at the fact that he had gotten under Nirrti's skin. "Guess everyone falls up the ladder these days…"

Sam snorted quietly and with a quick glance from the corner of his eyes, Jack found her smiling softly. She so liked his humor.

Nirrti obviously had no idea what his words meant but she was smart enough to recognize the insult in them.

" _Guard your tongue, human!_ " the male Goa'uld, Ares, ordered while stepping forwards threateningly. Carter followed him with her eyes cautiously, taking careful aim in case the Goa'uld should decide to go for Jack.

Jack looked at the other man, slightly curious, when he spoke. He had such a deep voice it sounded as if he was speaking with a foreign accent.

"Who are you to command me?" Jack asked calmly.

" _I am the almighty Goa'uld Ares. I am your god–_ " the Goa'uld began but Jack interrupted him with an annoyed wave of his hand.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," the Colonel sighed. "Always the same ol' story… I am your god, I will rule you, bow to me… yadda, yadda, yadda."

"Actually, sir, as far as I remember, none of these self-proclaimed gods really survived to reign over us," Sam reminded him, sounding something between smug and threatening. It was clearly a message to the Goa'uld standing opposite of them.

"Oh, guess what? You're right," Jack smirked as if the thought had just occurred to him. "Guess the Tau'ri aren't taken over that easily, are they?"

"No sir, they're not," his 2IC confirmed.

Nirrti raised a perfectly shaped eyebrow. " _Well, despite your highfalutin words, the Goa'uld have taken over already._ "

"Oh yeah? As far as I can see, your Jaffa are all out of order, so I don't see how you could have control over anything, let alone a whole _planet_ ," Jack remarked.

Nirrti shrugged detached. " _These are not all Jaffa in my service. There are more to come. After all, we now have control over the Chaapa'ai._ "

Well, would you look at that, Jack thought almost smugly. So they intended to use the Stargate to take over Earth. Knowing the Goa'uld High Council, they would probably first send forces to take over, mostly Jaffa as cannon fodder and a few minor Goa'uld nobody would care about if they fell in the first battles. Then, upon hearing from them that their target was secured, they would send more squads to conquer Earth. The fact that they did it this way was probably thanks to the insight Nirrti had gotten into Carter's brain, Jack supposed. They had tried before to attack Earth with their motherships, but SG-1's dumb luck and, of course, their legendary skills had assured they hadn't managed to succeed. So now, knowing through Carter that the Stargate was still unknown to the public, they did the same as Jack and Sam had done in their rescue mission: they were stealthily advancing from within, using the element of surprise.

Jack gritted his teeth. No fucking way in hell would they get anywhere! Not as long as he and Carter were there!

"Well, I guess your invasion ends here," Jack stated confidently.

" _Because of you?_ " Nirrti asked amused, looking them up and down derisively. " _Your whole base couldn't hold us back. What makes you think, you two can?_ "

"Experience?" Jack shot back unimpressed. "After all, as far as I remember, this isn't the first time we've foiled your plans."

Now Nirrti looked decidedly unamused. " _We'll see about that, Colonel!_ " she all but snarled.

"I guess we will," Jack answered, knowing instinctively that this was the sign that would stop all semi-polite small talk and start the action-y part. Without an outwardly obvious shift, he readied himself for battle, determined to take these Goa'uld down with everything he had. Because the fate of his home planet and the lives of almost six billion people were at stake here. And it went against anything Jack believed in to bow to a supposed god who was nothing but a parasite living off a human host.

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Sam saw the tiniest movements that gave off that the Colonel was preparing for battle and instinctively reacted to it. She had just gotten ready when Nirrti began the battle with a swift movement. The Goa'uld raised her arm so fast, Sam almost failed to react in time, but when she saw the hand device on her palm glow viciously her body reacted instantly, even before her head had any time to understand what was going on.

Sam's psychic powers activated, by now almost routinely, and the Major braced herself for the impact of the hand device's force. As expected the strength of the alien device hit her shield with the force of a truck going full-speed but thanks to her protection Sam didn't feel much of it. Next to her the Colonel was being pushed back a few inches from the sheer force but his superhuman strength assured he stood his ground. Sam saw cuts and rips dig into his BDUs and here and there dark spots appeared, telling her that he was bleeding, but she knew he would heal himself immediately and she didn't have to worry.

Nirrti raised her eyebrows astonished and lowered her weapon slightly, interrupting her attack on the two SGC officers. Obviously she hadn't expected them to withstand. Sam knew Nirrti had lost to Jack and his powers before when he had freed Sam from the snake's possession, but the Major wasn't sure if the Goa'uld had drawn the connection between her loss and the Colonel's new powers. After all, Sam had protected the secret of him having Ancient genes and the abilities they gave him fiercely while the snake had tried to plough through her brain and memories, so Sam was pretty sure that, if at all, Nirrti had only a vague idea of what Jack was capable of.

The moment the Goa'uld halted her attack however, the Colonel took over, not wanting to wait until the snakes had recovered from their surprise. Sam heard his P90 go off with an almost nostalgic feeling, but she knew as well as the Colonel himself did that the effort was wasted. The two Goa'uld simply activated the shields on their hand devices and smiled at them tauntingly while Jack's rapidly coming bullets bounced off their defenses futilely. Sam saw the Colonel grit his teeth but eventually he stopped his assault, seeing that this was gaining nothing.

" _You don't learn, do you?_ " Nirrti asked amused when silence fell in the 'Gate room, once again. " _Your firearms do not work against the Goa'uld._ "

"Oh, I know," Jack answered calmly. "I just like shooting at you."

Nirrti's face narrowed in anger and in response to that, Ares shifted quickly, his arm going forwards, and this time the ruby on his hand device glowed as brightly as Sam had never before seen. The bright red color was bathing the 'Gate room in a sickening color and instinctively, Sam knew this blast would send the Colonel flying, supernatural strength or not. There was just too much power behind it.

"NO!" Sam called out without noticing and then reacted without thinking. With a swift strike of her arm, she lashed out, her anger amplifying her power, and directed the hit towards the attacking Goa'uld. Sam could feel her psychic powers striking out like a sword of wind, smashing into the force coming from the hand device, energy crashing into energy. The two invisible powers clashed viciously and blew up with force, sending air rushing furiously all around the room and making all assembled within the room skid back a few inches before they had gathered their footing again.

Stunned silence reigned in the room while they all tried to understand what exactly had happened. Sam's scientist brain already explained to her what had occurred while she still stared at her hands, stumped by what she had caused. She knew her powers were connected to her feelings and that she was so much stronger when she was emotionally involved, but this? Sam had never used this much strength. She hadn't even known she could. She had always been wary of what could happen if she were to fully unleash her abilities. But against the Goa'uld? She really had no scruple. Even less if she could spare Jack a probably painful, damaging direct hit.

" _Hm…_ " Nirrti commented after a while. " _So a few of you do learn. I'm impressed, Major Carter. So you learned to control your powers through me?_ "

"The hell I did," Sam snapped at her, irritated by the mere sight of the Goa'uld. How dare she just assume it had been _her_ who had enabled Sam to gain control over her powers when it had all been the Colonel's doing?

Nirrti looked at her, rather hungrily, and it made Sam's skin crawl. " _For a human, you are outstanding,_ " she admitted and somehow Sam couldn't see that as a compliment. " _You really make the perfect host._ "

"Forget it!" Sam shut her down immediately. _Never_ again would she allow one of those snakes anywhere near her head again! She'd rather die.

Nirrti smiled knowingly, as if she was thinking she really didn't need Sam's permission for taking over reign of her body, and it made the Major almost see red. It really was annoying beyond words that those Goa'uld always thought they had all rights imaginable to do whatever sick, twisted thing came to their minds. Humans were no property! They had their free minds and, knowing this by firsthand experience, should not be forced to do anything that went against their free will and their beliefs. And then consciously have to suffer through it, as well as all people who had known them beforehand…

Sam shot a quick glance over to the Colonel, whose eyes switched between Nirrti and Ares attentively. She really didn't want him to have to go through something similar ever again! Despite being SG-1, even their luck couldn't hold forever.

So there was no way Nirrti – or any other Goa'uld for that matter – was getting their filthy hands on Sam ever again as far as she was concerned.

Simultaneously, as if they had an agreement, Sam and Nirrti lashed out at the other. Sam carefully measured the amount of force she put behind the strike because she didn't want to overexert herself. Despite being underestimated often, Nirrti was no opponent one should take lightly and right now Sam knew she and the Colonel were the only ones on Earth who could pose a challenge to the Goa'uld and hinder them from attacking Earth yet again, so it wouldn't do for her to exhaust herself with one strike Nirrti could probably block with her hand device.

Again, their attacks clashed together and blew up, but this time rather harmlessly. Nirrti hadn't put much strength into it either. Ticked off, Sam realized the Goa'uld probably held back because she didn't want to harm Sam's body, thinking it too precious to damage.

Anger surged through Sam and this time, she thrust out both arms at Nirrti, slowly advancing towards her while the Goa'uld shielded herself with the help of her hand device. Sam upped the strength, trying to find the right amount to break through the shield. It was impossible for the device to withstand every force, this much Sam knew, or neither of the Goa'uld they had conquered until now would have died in the first place. Explosions, for example, could kill them, hand device or not. The question was how much energy exactly did it need for the hand device to fail and leave these snakes to their own, almost nonexistent methods of self-defense?

However, Sam was so concentrated on the task of cornering Nirrti that she almost forgot about a single, important detail. And that was Ares' presence. From the corner of her eyes, she saw him coming, running towards them with a light jog to interrupt their little confrontation. He didn't reach her though, not even remotely. The Colonel intercepted him before he could get anywhere near Sam. Sam noticed his arm swinging at the Goa'uld from her peripheral vision, not daring to let Nirrti out of her sight. Ares apparently didn't even bother to avoid the blow, trusting in his faithful tool to take the hit and make it ricochet harmlessly. But Sam knew better. Having it experienced uncountable times in their training fights she knew that, while the Colonel most likely wouldn't have enough strength to break through the hand device's shield, seeing that the Jaffa couldn't either, he could still push his opponent and their shield back with the brute force he wielded. The energy of the force field provided a physical component that could make attacks like hits or bullets bounce away and allowed it to be touched. A normal human would probably break their hand if they tried to hit the shield but the Colonel, having trained with Sam and her shield, had learned to use his supernatural strength in a way that enabled him to push the whole shield, with its wielder in the middle, back.

So Sam wasn't astonished when Ares was thrown off, taken completely by surprise, and the Colonel used the opportunity to go after him, leaving Sam to deal with Nirrti. Good, Sam thought grimly. She still had some unfinished business with that woman!

Concentrating back on the task at hand, Sam noticed Nirrti was gradually using strength to push back against her, trying to throw her off of her. So Sam was probably getting closer. The problem was, the closer she got the more power she had to use. And Sam was still inexperienced with her abilities. Yes, she had gotten better but since her powers were something completely alien to her body, she still needed a lot of practice to really have control over them and to know how to correctly estimate them. And for that, she needed time she hadn't had yet.

She needed a new tactic before she would run out of energy, Sam concluded, when her arms began to feel heavy under the amount of pressure she used to attack Nirrti. Sam interrupted her approach, but instantly went in again, physically assaulting Nirrti's shield with measured blows, using her own body's strength, her knowledge of physics and her powers to enhance the strikes in the hopes of getting the shield to shatter like glass if she would hit the right spot with the right amount of strength. Sam knew this was merely an attempt, essentially a shot in the dark, because she had no means of knowing if her course of action would even succeed. But it was still worth the try, she figured. After all, she had no better idea right now.

Slowly, Sam pushed the Goa'uld back with the combinations she used on her she'd learned in her Academy days. She wasn't advanced in hand-to-hand for nothing, after all. The strikes would have connected nicely with Nirrti and probably put her body out of order if Sam had been able to reach her. But the shield withstood whatever Sam threw its way.

Grunting frustrated, the Major interrupted her assault, panting slightly. Nirrti retreated a few steps to bring some distance between them and Sam noticed she was also breathing harder. The hand device was drawing power from its owner to function, using the naquadah in the host's blood that originated from the Goa'uld's possession as a power source, and by this was slowly draining Nirrti's strength. It was essentially functioning in a similar way to Sam's own powers by drawing strength from physical components. But Sam was aware that the Goa'uld had a few advantages she didn't have. They had healing powers that could heal their exhaustion whenever the hand device would deprive them, which made them able to carry on almost infinitely. When Sam would've run out of energy, she'd simply be done. She didn't have the possibility to heal herself. So in the long run Sam knew the Goa'uld would win. They just had to sit the fight out and wait for her to exert herself beyond the point of exhaustion.

Shit, Sam thought. She needed a plan, and a good one, or she wouldn't be able to defeat Nirrti at all!

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Jack and Ares were engaged in a rapid exchange of blows that left the Colonel slightly out of breath. Good thing he had kept himself in shape by training with Carter or he would have already taken a decent beating by the Goa'uld! Apparently, Ares wasn't named to be the god of war for nothing. The host's body was packed with muscles and the punches he threw really hurt when Jack couldn't dodge them in time. Jack's strikes however were almost completely deflected by the hand device's shield.

For cryin' out loud, the Colonel grouched inwardly. There had to be a way to get rid of these annoying things! Because seeing how he and apparently Carter too struggled to stand up to these snakes, there was no way they could defeat them and save Earth if they couldn't rip them of their devices which gave them unfair advantages in the fight!

Jack sent a high kick towards Ares, pushing him back a little with the strength he used, and tried to think of what Carter had said about these hand devices. Highly charged weapons like the zats and the staff weapons or weapons firing with too much velocity like their firearms couldn't pierce the hand device's shields. The higher the energy they had to reflect, the more effective they became, unless it was so much energy that they couldn't counter it anymore, like an explosion.

So, given what they were capable of if they gave it their all, he could understand that they'd be repelled by the shield. But he had tried going at the hand device's shield with more and with less force in various attempts to get through. But he didn't. Ares deflected whatever Jack threw his way without even sparing it any attention, much to the Colonel's displeasure, who really had to look out for the Goa'uld's punches.

Maybe he had to go _slower_ about it? Trying his luck, Jack reached out until his hands bumped against the barrier the shield had erected between him and his enemy. Careful to add a bit force behind his strike but not too much, he began pushing against the barrier. He immediately felt the energy pushing back, his arms trembling under the strain to remain where they were when the hand device gave it's all to throw Jack off.

At the beginning nothing happened, no matter how much Jack added or lowered the strength he used and he began asking himself if it was even possible to physically attack a Goa'uld who used the hand device's shield. After all, if it had been that easy, Teal'c would've done it already…

Ares observed him closely, trying to figure out what Jack was trying to accomplish, but suddenly the Goa'uld's head jerked sideways, looking away from Jack. Puzzled, Jack followed the other man's line of vision and found the Goa'uld staring at Sam and Nirrti, who were engaged in what would have been a fierce hand-to-hand combat battle if his 2IC would have been able to touch her opponent. Nevertheless, Carter pushed the Goa'uld scientist back bit by bit with her well-placed, strong hits and Jack felt strangely proud while watching. Nirrti's shield absorbed all energy Carter put into her strikes but still she was forced to retreat and if Jack was right he thought the woman to look slightly exhausted. After all, Nirrti was a scientist and no fighter, completely unlike his competent 2IC.

Ares frowned slightly while he watched the exchange and then an annoyed expression appeared on the other man's face. Ignoring Jack for the time being, Ares raised his left arm, his hand device glowing fiercely when he pointed it at the fighting women just when Carter retreated a bit to catch her breath and prepare for another, stronger attack. Jack felt his stomach drop when he realized Ares was about to interfere and send his 2IC flying, apparently feeling that Nirrti needed the backup. And seeing how concentrated Carter was on her fight with Nirrti, she wouldn't expect the blow from behind, much less when she assumed Jack had the other Goa'uld occupied!

Jack swallowed, slight panic clawing into his mind when the red gem in Ares' palm began to glow forebodingly, pointed at the single most important woman in his life.

The shield of the hand device vanished to let the energy strike through and seeing that the shield was invisible, Jack only noticed because he had his hands directly on it. When they suddenly grabbed onto empty air, fumbling for the hold he had just leaned against, he was momentarily stumped until his head caught up and seeing his chance, he reacted instinctively. Jack drew his fist back and lashed out at the Goa'uld, thrusting his arm forwards with all the strength he had. And now that the Goa'uld was otherwise occupied, his attention on his attack and away from defending himself, Jack hit Ares full-force. Satisfied, Jack heard something crunch and snap in the other man's face when his fist connected. Ares staggered back slightly but caught himself almost immediately. Jack had to give him credit that he didn't give any outward sign on his pain. Okay, the Goa'uld within him was probably already healing him but still, the pain must have been something. The skin around one of his eyes was quickly turning red and swollen and the cheekbone underneath didn't look any better.

Still, Jack didn't wait for his opponent to recover. Instantly he went in again and grabbed for the man's left arm, one of his hands holding it in place while the other went for the hand device. If he could rid Ares of that, he might have a decent chance at defeating the bastard!

Ares caught on to his intention before Jack could succeed. Now Jack could see anger flash across the other man's face and while he would have been satisfied that he was finally posing a challenge to the Goa'uld, it only served to make him fight Jack seriously. The Goa'uld came at him and Jack knew he had to take the hit if he didn't want to let go of the device. Tightening his grip, Jack prepared for the Goa'uld's fist's impact, knowing from all the blows he had taken that it would hurt, and he wasn't disappointed. The Goa'uld's fist rammed into Jack's stomach, only barely missing his solar plexus. Jack grunted from the immense pain that shot through his body, trying to breathe through it, even though his breath was all gone the moment the Goa'uld's punch had connected. Jack staggered, but concentrating hard, he managed to hold onto the device with the pure stubbornness he was infamous for.

Gathering his strength, Jack pulled and managed to rip the hand device from the Goa'uld's arm. With a very satisfying crunching sound the metal dented and then slipped from Ares' arm, leaving the device to dangle in Jack's hand. Smiling, even though he still hurt a freaking lot, Jack straightened triumphantly. Ares glowered at him hatefully but didn't say a word. Apparently, the guy wasn't really chatty.

Jack couldn't help but twirl the device a bit, just to mock his opponent, who had just lost his foremost advantage in battle.

" _Now_ we're talking," the Colonel grinned before turning and calling out to Carter.

His 2IC was currently deflecting Nirrti's attacks but when she heard his voice, she forced her opponent back with her own strength and then chanced a quick glance over to him. Upon seeing he had her attention, he threw her the hand device. Completely astonished but with her reflexes kicking in, she caught the device, staring at it as if it was a hallucination. But Jack knew she wouldn't take long to catch on. Their military minds worked similar and she would see the advantage this blasted thing would give her. Carter had been possessed by Jolinar, who had died in her body to boot, so she had naquadah in her blood. Naquadah that would activate the hand device. And with her being controlled by Nirrti for a certain amount of time, she should now also know what to do with the device to get it working.

Jack saw the exact moment Carter caught on and slipped the dented device onto her slim hand. The red gem in her palm glowed, showing them all that it accepted Carter as its master even though she was no Goa'uld.

Jack's grin widened even more when she turned back for Nirrti, looking even more determined. Smirking, Jack also turned back to face his opponent. The odds had now considerably evened out.


	51. Ending

**_Author's notes_** _: First of all, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _And then I apologize for being a little late in posting this, but I'm again experiencing problems with the system (this time with the chapter upload, which is a rather important little feature) and I hope it will soon get fixed for real, because it's driving. me. nuts. (Also I'm sorry should there be more mistakes than usually, I kind of rushed through corrections to get the chapter up as soon as possible)  
_

 ** _Beyond Reason_**

 _Chapter Fifty-One – Ending_

Sam felt the strange power of the hand device warm her palm and tingle up her arm and if she was honest, she would have loved nothing more than to throw the damned thing down some very, very high mountain. Unfortunately the Colonel throwing her the thing was as good as an order for her to put it on and use it, and Sam knew best that they could really use the tactical advantage this thing would provide them. They weren't really gaining any ground against the two Goa'uld and that was looking at it from a flattering angle.

So they needed to go with what they could get their hands on. Thus Sam hadn't hesitated to slip the hand device on, even if it vastly reminded her of the time Nirrti had controlled her body. Then she had walked around with this thing 24/7 as a demonstration of Nirrti's power and strength and simultaneously her mechanism of defense from her own Jaffa should they ever come up with traitorous thoughts.

Well, Sam mused, at least she now knew how to handle such a thing. And going by the hated glow of the gem in her palm, Sam knew it had activated upon her touch, recognizing the low amount of naquadah in her bloodstream enough to fool the device.

The moment Sam had adjusted to the new situation, she looked around. The Colonel and Ares had gone back to trading punches that hurt from watching. Without Ares' shield they were decidedly more even, both of them using their superior strength to try to injure the other, but Sam had to admit that Ares was still holding himself pretty good against the Colonel. In contrast to Nirrti he obviously was a fighter, going by the expert way he delivered his blows, and went for critical parts of the Colonel's body. If Sam had to guess, then she'd say he had already had to take a few blows and part of his energy was going into healing himself, so while he was keeping the Goa'uld at a good distance, the Colonel failed to really gain the upper hand. Sam gulped at seeing how brutal both men went at each other. There was nothing even remotely fair about the fight. It was dirty, nasty and probably highly painful. They hit, twisted, kicked or punched anything they got a hold on and already, Sam could make out several points the Colonel was shielding so he could heal them. His weight was on his right leg, favoring the left one, and when he had to block a hit, he put his left forearm before the right, no matter how impractical the move was. He carefully protected his face and going from the spilled blood there, Sam guessed his nose had been hit sometime in between. Wincing in sympathy, Sam hoped he was able to hold on, because she really couldn't come to his help. With her much lower physical strength and her level of hand-to-hand she really was no opponent for Ares.

And she had an opponent of her own. Turning her attention back to the woman standing opposite of her, Sam concentrated on the hated sight of Nirrti. With the hand device, this was going to be a whole new fight! Now they were finally fighting at eye level.

Smirking, Sam raised her arm, sending her strength into the hand device and feeling the device increase it exponentially until a large blast rushed through the room, heading for Nirrti. The Goa'uld narrowed her eyes, seemingly deciding to take Sam serious for once, and then blocked the hit. But Sam saw her slide back a few feet until she caught herself. Her eyes glowered when she answered with a hit of her own and copying her enemy's moves, Sam deflected the attack.

" _Shit!_ " Sam thought when she felt the hand device draw on her strength to keep going, leaving her feeling dizzy and slightly nauseous and her head spinning. Sam abruptly realized she still had _the same fucking problem_ : Nirrti could still defeat her by waiting until Sam had exhausted her whole energy, all the while healing her own exhaustion until Sam had wasted whatever strength she still had.

And going by the calm expression on the other woman's face, her scientific mind and her knowledge about the Tau'ri – knowledge she had gained through Sam to boot – she knew. Damn!

Sam realized she had no possibility of winning a longer fight with Nirrti. The hand device might protect her and give her some advantages but she was losing too much strength trying to keep it running. Strength she didn't have on end. And Sam figured the Colonel wasn't faring much better. He was up to par with Ares, now that he had rid him of his hand device, but still, the more the fight would drag out and the more he got injured, the more Ares would gain the upper hand. Because apparently the Goa'uld didn't need as much strength and concentration to heal himself as Jack did.

Sam knew they would have to end it. Sooner rather than later before they were running out of energy. And Sam was still all too aware of the fact that there was an A-bomb to come for them, so time was essential, too.

Sam knew unfailingly that her powers were superior to Nirrti's, even superior to her technology if she put her all on the line. If she was going all out, she could defeat the Goa'uld, she was sure of it. The problem was she didn't have enough influence on her powers to do that. It still took her much concentration to hold the level she currently did when all she had done on Laterra was practicing to keep a tight reign over her powers so she wouldn't hurt anyone. She had pushed her powers back so much she had no idea what she really was capable of. And she had also already used up a lot of energy. Sam didn't know if she would still be able to produce enough energy to defeat the Goa'uld. She knew she could do the needed amount, she just didn't know if she could do it _anymore_. She was exhausted and even though she was running on adrenaline, even this would fail her sometime in the not-so-far future. It was just the way the human body was constructed: it would shut down before Sam could go over her own limits. Before she would totally exhaust herself, she would probably fall unconscious, with or without adrenaline, her body would assure it to guarantee her survival.

And Sam was aware she wasn't as far from this point as she would have liked. And the Colonel probably wasn't either. So they needed to end this, quickly.

Sam looked around the room, trying to find anything in the dimmed green lights that could help them gain the upper hand. Sam's eyes fell upon the Stargate, which was about the only thing within the room and immediately she thought of the glider behind it. Sam halted, her head quickly calculating. Probably wouldn't work on Nirrti with her shield but maybe on Ares…?

Sam's head shot around and giving a shit about stealth and secrecy, she yelled: "Sir! The glider!"

Jack halted in his advance on his opponent for the tiniest second, which told Sam he had caught on and was thinking her suggestion through.

Without a visible sign of him deciding on anything, Sam suddenly felt a low humming in the air, almost unnoticeable, and immediately she knew the glider's weapon system was powering up. Just in case, Sam jumped back, bringing quite a bit distance between herself and Nirrti, should the Colonel decide to go for her, too. The Colonel also disengaged from his opponent and almost instantly, Sam saw white, hot plasma beams shoot through the half-darkness of the room, seemingly coming out of nowhere. The first shots were aimed at Nirrti but she deflected them with her shield and from then on the blasts concentrated on Ares. The Goa'uld managed to sidestep two shots but then was hit spot-on. He went down, smoldering smoke rising from his shoulder and chest. To Sam's and Jack's dismay however, he scrambled back to his feet, even if quite unstable. His right arm dangled lankily next to his body and his shoulder was a huge, gushing wound, the white of bone shining through burned flesh here and there. The Goa'uld showed as much pain as Sam had ever seen one display, so the wound had to freaking hurt. For a human, Sam didn't doubt that it would have been lethal but for a Goa'uld with their healing abilities? It was probably only something that would put him out of order for a little while given what little fire power the small glider was capable of.

Jack visibly gritted his teeth, displeased that the shot hadn't taken Ares out completely, and going by the electrical charging of the air, Sam guessed he readied the glider for the next round. However, Nirrti was faster. She ran to her comrade's side and stepping in front of him, she included him in her hand device's shield.

Stumped, Sam watched. It was unusual, even completely uncharacteristic for a Goa'uld to help another. Even more, Ares appeared to be a minor Goa'uld, someone who was under Nirrti's command. Why should she give a shit about what was happening to the man? Unless she still needed him for something. Or someone else still needed him for something. Whatever it was, Sam had no means of knowing. She just knew Nirrti's interference had saved the other Goa'uld's life and although Jack tried, the glider's blasts wouldn't go through their shield. Sam gnawed on her lower lip. The glider was a small one with only minimal defense and offense systems. There were only so many blasts the glider could emit and then they would be out. And if Nirrti would bring up enough strength to keep her shield up during that time, then nothing would have changed about their situation.

What else, Sam thought frantically. There had to be something else they could use to finally get rid of these pests!

Again, Sam's eyes wandered and they landed on the Stargate once more. Contemplating, Sam observed the motionless alien ring when a sudden stray spark of energy danced along one of the chevrons. An idea shot into Sam's mind. She chanced a quick glance at the Goa'uld but the Colonel was keeping them busy, so as long as she heard the glider shoot, she should have the time to think her plan through. Sam stepped up to the Stargate, careful to stay at a safe distance. They had gotten it to overload to cause a base-wide blackout but usually energy didn't just disappear. She herself had cut the redirecting wiring to deny the energy any outlet, so essentially it all still had to be within the Stargate. The alien device was a superconductor with a vast storage capacity, so the amount of energy still within it had to be overwhelming. Literally.

If they could use it somehow, it would certainly be enough to fry Nirrti and her companion. The energy certainly had to be enough to rival that of an explosion, so if Sam could think of a way to use the energy then it could finally be what they needed to get through Nirrti's shield.

Sam's eyes narrowed when her head confronted her with an obvious problem: how did she plan to get the energy to the Goa'uld? There was nothing there to conduct the energy and nothing she could construct in such little time that the Goa'uld wouldn't catch on with her intention…

Absentmindedly, Sam played with the ribbon device on her hand when another thought hit her. Sam almost winced at her own idea. It was risky. No, it was stupid. Downright stupid, wrong and probably the most reckless idea she had ever come up with – and that had to mean something! The Colonel would kick her ass from here to Timbuktu!

Speaking of the Colonel, Sam suddenly realized the glider had ceased fire. It was eerily silent in the room. Swiveling around Sam saw Nirrti and Ares stand opposite of the Colonel, both smirking triumphantly. The hand device had protected them from the blasts and even given Ares the time to heal his injury. Already the wound looked better but Sam saw the Colonel still favored his injured leg. Damn it all!

Sam contemplated what to do when Nirrti raised her arm once more, the red ruby glowing bright and destructive in the middle of her palm. She took aim at the Colonel and Sam nearly felt her heart stop at that sight. Would he still be able to take the hit? Would he manage to dodge it in time with his injuries? Sam had no means of knowing how bad he was really hurt, but she knew it couldn't go on like that any longer.

Acting in the split of a second, deciding to follow through with the idea that could well be her very last one but would _definitely_ tip the fight one way or another, Sam stepped backwards until the shape of the Stargate behind her blocked out the green emergency lighting and yelled: "Sir! Get out of the way!"

He pivoted around pretty fast given his injuries, his eyes searching her out in the half-darkness while his body kept pointed towards their enemies. He looked confused, not understanding what she was getting at when she slowly raised her left arm so that her ribbon device aimed at the two Goa'uld standing closely together.

She saw him opening his mouth to question her while his body routinely obeyed to her plea. He moved to the side habitually, knowing that whatever she was about to do would function all the better if he did what she needed him to do.

Sam didn't wait for him to catch on. He would only order her to refrain from it, anyways. She inhaled deeply, taking a second to go through her calculations again, hoping, no praying, that she hadn't made a mistake somewhere…

Steeling herself with resolve she didn't feel going by her shaking knees, Sam reached out with one hand behind her – and laid it upon the Stargate.

Immediately the energy stored within the large device came to life with audible crackling now that it had found a new way out: through her body. Sam knew her boot's soles were made out of rubber and so her body would not conduct the electricity, which would assure the energy wouldn't roast her body immediately. Oh, it would go through her body and would probably leave quite a bit of damage, maybe even killing her in the process, but it would leave when it would find what she was providing: an exit. Her hand device would pull on the extra power, transfer the energy and send it outwards at the target Sam was aiming at: the two Goa'uld.

Sam had calculated all that beforehand and if she would have been lucid enough to notice, she would have seen that it worked out the way she had imagined it. What Sam had had no means of knowing however had been the pain she had to experience when the highly charged electricity surged through her body before leaving through the hand device. She had anticipated that it would be a first explosion of electricity when she would provide a leaving point and when that was depleted there would only be a small trickle of leftover energy she would have to handle, but this first explosion of electricity was enough to torture her body with an amount of pain she had never felt before – and she had been subjected to torture of various forms!

Sam cried out strangled while her body shook and trembled under the force of the electricity racing through it, unable to control her own body reactions anymore. The electricity was conjuring up mad crackling sounds while it flew through the room to crash into the intended target. Sam smelled a strange burning stench that remotely reminded her of a cable fire and dimly, she realized the ribbon device on her palm was heating up uncomfortably under the amount of energy she was sending through it.

Voices yelled and screamed around her but Sam had no idea who that was or why they were shouting. Her whole concentration was focused on keeping her arm raised high and not faltering under the pain she was feeling.

Suddenly, it was all over. The energy died down, now that the surplus had erupted free. Sam sucked in a relieved breath that rattled in her battered chest and coughed. Vaguely, she felt some liquid spill with her coughs and it didn't need a genius to understand it was blood. She was probably bleeding internally from a few wounds the high amount of electricity had caused. Sam tried to look around for the enemy but her body wasn't reacting to her commands anymore. Actually she found it astonishing she had managed to get out of this conscious.

As if to prove her wrong, Sam felt herself sway and then fall. She hit the ground face-first but in comparison, the pain was nothing. It got all her injuries to light up like fires all over her body but at least it dimmed comparatively fast. Idly, while lying flat on the ground, Sam asked herself if it was possible to be unable to fall unconscious because you were in too much pain. Had that ever been properly researched?

" _SAM!_ " a concerned voice yelled with something akin to panic.

The Colonel, she realized sluggishly. From her position on the floor she heard footsteps coming closer at a dead run and then she was jostled around. That should probably hurt, she figured, but she was already hurting so much it didn't really make a difference. In fact, her body ached with a confusing mix of pain and a strange numbness tingling through her limbs which was about the only thing keeping the pain to a level that enabled Sam to hang onto consciousness.

"Sam…! Oh my god!" his voice said, trembling.

Sam wanted to look at him but her stubborn head wouldn't move, just hanging limply to the side, blood slowly dripping from the corner of her mouth.

She felt his hands on her hot skin, a nice, cool contrast where she felt like burning up. He ripped the hand device from her arm and that actually relieved a bit of the pain. He cursed when he touched the hot metal but almost immediately his cool hands returned to her body. And they were getting even cooler, the cold spreading through her body like a comforting blanket. Sam sighed, which ended in a somewhat gurgling sound. Somehow and Sam wondered how he was doing it, her pain lessened. The crushing grip of the pain was slowly loosening up, releasing her, almost getting bearable and as soon as she felt able to do it, Sam sucked in greedy breaths. Her head cleared considerably and then she became aware enough of herself to turn her head.

The Colonel was sitting next to her, a concentrated but completely wrecked expression on his face. And while he still appeared as physically well as she'd seen him the last time, he looked as if he'd been mauled over by one hell of a nightmare. His massive frame was bent down towards her, apparently giving a shit about the company of their enemy. So Sam assumed she had at least been able to take them out somehow or he wouldn't be here with her.

His hands lay on her body, one at her throat and the other over her stomach. From there spread an almost heavenly feeling of cold and comfort as if his mere essence was spilling into her, grounding her and keeping her alive…

Sam almost startled when she finally connected the dots. He was healing her! Of course, there was no other possible explanation!

But going by the damage she had probably inflicted on her body and his state of exhaustion even before she had decided to play fuse-box, he couldn't have the amount of energy needed to heal her anymore! It was impossible!

Sam looked up into his wary, battered face. Blood dripped from his nose and this time she was sure it wasn't coming from the broken nose Ares had given him.

"S-sir…" she whispered, struggling with the words. "S-stop…!"

He didn't acknowledge her words but simply kept going.

"Sir…!" she repeated, trying to get her voice to sound urgent. "Ple-ase…!"

"Shut up, Carter!" he growled.

"No…" she countered and this finally got him to look at her. Surprised Sam stared at the unshed tears she found in his eyes.

"Tha-t's… enough," she pressed out. How come speaking was so terribly difficult right now?

He snorted, his face grimacing into some mask of anger and sarcasm. "Are you stupid?" he snapped at her. "At this rate, with your injuries, you're gonna die!"

Sam wanted to smile but that proved to be too much effort. She had been prepared for that possible outcome. "You… healing… me… harms… y-you," she managed to phrase.

"Who cares?" he barked.

"I… do," Sam answered.

Again he looked at her, his face an unreadable mask in the green emergency lighting. Then, suddenly, as if some higher power had picked up on her thought, the lights came back on. Sam blinked disorientated, her eyes having to adjust to the sudden change in brightness.

Taking another deep breath, Sam's head caught up with what it had to mean that the lights were back on. The lockdown had been ended. Someone, probably General Hammond himself, had ended the security protocols and gotten the energy back on track. Which meant the base was under control of the Air Force once more. Their friends had freed themselves and had worked on getting the base operational again.

Now it wouldn't be long until they would get their weapons and storm in here, shooting before asking questions…

Sam looked at Jack. "S-sir… go…!" she urged, trying to point at the Stargate and the glider behind it. She had no idea though if the Stargate was really working right now given the wrecking she had put it through, so she didn't know if he could actually flee.

He looked at where she was pointing as if he'd forgotten where they actually were. Sam knew they didn't have much time anymore. The moment the SF's or the SG teams would arrive, they would arrest them. He had to be faster.

He shook his head. "Not without you, Carter," he said determined.

She grimaced, slightly surprised she was still able to. "C-can't…" she said.

He went up to the balls of his feet, careful to keep his hands on her body. "I'll carry you," he answered simply.

Sam wanted to reply but the droning sound of footsteps approaching from behind them interrupted her. Panic began to overtake her. They were coming. They didn't have the time anymore. He had to go! Immediately. Alone.

"Ja-ck…!" she whispered, hoping he would leave if she pleaded with him. If _Sam_ pleaded with him.

Sam could see the SF's the moment they entered. From the way she was lying, she had a good look on the blast doors, so she saw the armed officers rushing in. Too late, she realized sadly.

"Hands up!" Sam heard an unfamiliar voice shout.

Jack's eyes narrowed and his face grew annoyed when he noticed the interruption but he didn't even as much as turned to acknowledge the command. Sam watched him but apparently he had no intention of following the order. Sam wished he would just do it. Raising his hands would mean he would finally take them off her body and sever the connection between them as long as he still had a bit energy left to heal his own wounds.

"Hands up where we can see them!" another SF demanded, repeating the order.

Sam looked at the SF but couldn't really see much thanks to the full uniform. He was aiming a P90 at them but throughout the group that was standing behind him Sam also saw a few zats, all of the weapons pointing at the Colonel's broad back since Sam very obviously was no threat anymore. Somewhere further away Sam could make out other SF's checking on the still figures of Ares and Nirrti that lay unmoving on the ground.

"I'm not going to repeat myself again!" the SF threatened. "Hands up or we'll shoot!"

Sam looked back to Jack, waiting for him to take his hands off her and raise them in surrender. He didn't.

"Sir…?" she whispered.

He shook his head in response, already knowing what she was trying to ask. Now Sam felt panic begin to rise within her. He refused to comply with the order! He refused to take his hands away from her when they both knew his healing abilities were all that still kept Sam alive. He was risking getting shot just to pull her through!

"Jack… please…!" she tried again, fear that he was getting hurt gripping her tight.

A concentrated frown appeared on his forehead, a sign he was struggling to keep going but he stubbornly went on, ignoring her pleas as much as the orders of the SF's. His eyes were blinking rapidly and he was breathing harshly through parted lips, betraying his exhaustion. He was barely holding on, trying to heal himself and her at the same time. Sam wasn't sure he even realized the severity of the situation.

Sam turned her head towards the impatiently waiting SF's and opened her mouth to shout a warning, an explanation, anything that would make them realize Jack was not a threat but nothing would come out of her parched mouth.

And then Sam saw something that let her blood turn to ice. Standing in the middle of the assembled SF's, the CO communicated something to his subordinates with a quick hand sign Sam instantly recognized. The order to shoot! And suddenly zat shots rang out in the 'Gate room. The P90's remained silent but the CO was taking Jack seriously enough to go for several zat shots, to make sure against all odds that the Colonel would be taken out.

Jack froze and Sam's body tensed involuntarily.

Sam saw a line of blue tinged energy miss him narrowly and flow over their heads.

Then he was hit. By a direct shot.

"No…!" Sam mumbled when she observed the blue energy dancing over his body.

He struggled but managed to stay on his feet and conscious. He turned to look at her. His face was contorted from the pain the zat caused him to feel but still he managed to smile at her while seeking comfort from her gaze. Sam looked back horrified, waiting for him to finally collapse under the strain of the alien weapon. Apparently, his healing abilities kept him conscious, fighting the weapon's effects.

He opened his mouth, trying to say something when Sam suddenly saw _another_ zat blast connect with him.

Shocked beyond words, Sam watched the blue energy lick all over his body before she cried with a hoarse voice: " _No!_ "

Before Jack could catch on what had happened however, his eyes rolled back and his large form collapsed, right on top of her. The impact pressed all air out of Sam's lungs and let all her injuries flare up angrily. Pain, physically as well as emotionally, surged through her body, letting tears well up in her eyes.

He had been shot! _Twice!_

Sam knew what that meant. Closing her eyes, she coughed, not really surprised when blood was once more accompanying the breath that left her body.

Jack's body was pressing down on her tormented chest and immediately Sam felt unconsciousness loom at the corner of her awareness. She didn't struggle against it. Instead she almost welcomed it as an escape to all the pain she was feeling.

"HOLD YOUR FIRE!" an enraged voice shouted furiously somewhere in the background. Sam thought she somehow knew the voice but she failed to place it. She also didn't really care to find out.

"Jack…" she whispered with her last strength. The picture of his body on hers was blurring with the tears the pain kept going, so Sam imagined his face as she'd seen it last: looking down at her with a soft smile to reassure her despite the pain and exhaustion he had been fighting. And holding onto this mental image, Major Samantha Carter lost consciousness in the middle of the 'Gate room after having saved Earth from another assault together with her Commanding Officer, Colonel Jack O'Neill. With a somehow strained smile, she finally subjected to the heavy pull that dragged her down, pulling her deeper, deeper and infinitely deeper.


	52. Mourning

_**Author's notes**_ _: Once more thank you all for reading, following and all your kind words in the reviews!_

 _And to all those who worried: obviously the last chapter wasn't the last and the story is still going on…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Two – Mourning_

Coming to proved to be a difficult task this time. Sam was vaguely aware that she was hovering on the edge of consciousness because, in all honesty, she had been through this routine often enough to know the feeling by heart, but doing the last step and opening her eyes just wasn't happening. For what she estimated to be a day or so, Sam switched in and out of sleep, not really resting but not awakening, either.

It was finally a well-known, familiar voice that got Sam to snap out of her daze. Opening her eyes, Sam was greeted with a sight she hadn't seen in months: Doctor Janet Fraiser. The petite woman was standing next to her bed, checking Sam's medical file while speaking with a nurse who stood farther back. For a moment, Sam simply watched her friend, waiting for memory to come back and tell her what had actually happened.

Janet turned and her eyes fell on Sam. Surprised, the Doctor halted mid-movement when Sam just gazed right back.

"Sam," Janet said warmly. "You're back."

Sam nodded, just the slightest hint of a movement because her head felt like weighing a ton.

"How do you feel?" Janet asked.

Sam opened her mouth to try and answer but no sound would come out. Janet nodded and waved her nurse off to go and fetch some water. When she came back with a glass and a straw, Sam carefully took a few sips. They fell into her empty stomach, making her feel nauseous instantly. Exhausted, Sam gestured and the nurse placed the glass onto the table attached to the hospital bed she was lying in. In another isolation room, as Sam noticed. It seemed to be getting a reoccurring theme whenever she and the Colonel were going MIA on another alien planet that she lost consciousness and woke up in an isolation room.

"What… happened?" Sam asked with a hoarse voice.

Janet's eyes turned sharp when she asked professionally: "What's the last thing you remember?"

Sam frowned before mentally kicking her head to do its job. What did she remember? She remembered getting Daniel's message on Laterra and deciding with Jack to go back and try to come to the SGC's help. She remembered them making their way across the base and their plan to take back control over the SGC. She remembered fighting the Goa'uld and winning, somehow. She remembered getting hurt when she had used the Stargate's electricity and she remembered Jack trying to heal her. And she vaguely remembered Jack getting shot down by a zat before she'd fallen unconscious.

"The Colonel!" Sam gasped before trying to sit up. "The Colonel was shot!"

Janet's hands clamped down on her shoulders and with ridiculously little strength the smaller woman pushed Sam back onto her bed.

"Calm down Sam or you'll further aggravate your injuries," Janet ordered.

Oh, to hell with her injuries, Sam thought infuriated. What about Jack?

"You have sustained major burn wounds externally as well as internally. You need to rest!" Janet insisted when Sam tried to struggle.

Sam snorted disbelieving. "The Colonel's healed me."

Janet huffed back. "He merely gave you enough energy to make you survive. Sam, with the stunt you've pulled, you should have died!"

Sam shook her head. "I was careful. The energy was only going through me, my boots prevented that I could take the energy in."

Janet looked at her with a dangerous expression that told Sam the other Major was considering whether or not to hit her. Apparently seeing her miserable state, Janet decided against corporal punishment. "Sam…" she said exasperated. "The human body isn't made to withstand that much energy! The heat it produced burned into your organs and muscles by simply passing through your body and the electricity got your heart to fail its rhythm. We almost lost you to cardiac arrest because your heart stopped beating when we arrived in the infirmary!"

"But the Colonel…" Sam began anew before Janet interrupted: "He gave you enough energy until we could get you to the infirmary but he didn't have enough energy left over to heal you. The fact that you're so well already is rather thanks to Nirrti–"

Janet abruptly cut herself off mid-sentence and Sam's mouth fell open in shock.

" _What?_ " she snapped.

Janet looked angry as if she had inadvertently revealed more than she had wanted. Sam stared at her but the CMO seemed reluctant to explain.

"Janet…!" Sam warned.

"Oh, fine!" the other woman gave in. "General Hammond made a deal with Nirrti so that she would heal you with the SGC's healing device when it seemed we were about to lose you, too!"

Sam paled. So Nirrti had survived her attack with the electricity, the shield apparently reducing the energy that had undoubtedly hit her enough for her, and Ares most likely too, to pull through. Damn. And even worse, by the looks of it the SGC had made a deal with Nirrti for Sam's health?

"What did the snake get for that?" Sam inquired, fearing for the worst. Nirrti certainly wouldn't have done it for the sake of the good, ol' days! "What did she want?"

"Oh, she _wanted_ a lot," Janet said without actually revealing what exactly. "What she got though was her freedom. And Ares'. General Hammond agreed to let them go through the Stargate if she would ensure your survival."

Sam sighed heavily while leaning back into her hospital bed. She should be glad she was still alive but just the thought of owing her life to Nirrti of all people was making her sick to the stomach.

Exhausted, Sam looked at Janet, who was watching her every move. What was her problem? Did Janet expect her to blow? Sam certainly felt enough anger but not enough strength. She was exhausted and her body needed the energy to recover more than to loathe Nirrti. Then another thought dawned on Sam. "The Colonel?" she asked tentatively.

Instantly, Janet's face turned into a mask of sympathy and Sam knew what she was going to say.

"No…" Sam whispered, barely audible.

Janet waved the nurse in the back out of the room and then turned to Sam. "Sam, I'm really sorry," she said. "But he's gotten hit by a zat. Twice."

Sam gulped. She remembered seeing him getting shot but she had only been half-conscious at that time and hadn't been sure what she had actually seen and/or imagined. She certainly wanted to have imagined it. But Sam immediately knew Janet told the truth. Because it would just be cruel to lie about something like that. And she knew what it meant. He had been shot. Twice. That was a lethal dose. Sam swallowed but her mouth was so dry she almost choked on the air she gulped down. She knew what it meant, even if her head refused to acknowledge the facts.

"Colonel O'Neill died on the way to the infirmary," Janet explained softly, her voice sounding almost harsh in the complete silence of the room. "He tried to hold on, he really did, but eventually we lost him before we could do anything."

Sam closed her eyes. Partly to block out Janet's sympathetic gaze that seemed to cut into her like a knife and partly to hold back the tears that threatened to flow. Jack was… _Jack was_ …

She couldn't even think it, let alone believe it! He hadn't been supposed to die! They had been successful, they had overthrown the Goa'uld once again! And for what? For him to die because of a misfired shot?

"Who?" Sam croaked.

"A rookie SF," Janet said, knowing immediately what Sam meant. "He's just been assigned to the project. It was a misunderstanding. The second shot was an accident. The NID is already checking the incident."

Sam couldn't care less. Despite asking, she didn't really care who had shot. She didn't care whether or not the 'accident' had consequences or not. All she cared about was that an _accident_ had ripped Jack away from her. An accident, of all things! He had survived zat blows before. He had survived wounds, injuries, torture, life-threatening situations and abduction. Only to be taken down by a misfired shot! From his own men, to boot.

He hadn't even been a threat to them. There had been no need to shoot him down in the first place…!

Sam felt the emotions trying to overflow. She was exhausted and injured, and her walls were dangerously down. She would have wished for Jack to be with her. Even if he would have been held in another isolation room, the thought alone that he was somewhere on the base with her would have been enough. But he wasn't. And he wouldn't ever be again. Because of some rookie's mistake. How ironic.

"Sam?" Janet asked when she failed to react in any way.

It took an impossible effort but Sam managed to pry her eyes open and look at her long-time friend. Janet fidgeted slightly when she said: "You know… When I examined you, I noticed… What I mean is… seeing that you were AWOL for about six months I had to do a complete examination and I noticed…"

Sam failed to catch on. Janet obviously wanted to tell her something important but Sam's mind was unusually blank, not getting what Janet was hinting at.

Sighing, the CMO said: "Sam, I know what has happened. Between you and the Colonel. And I just wanted to say…"

Sam tuned out when the meaning of Janet's words slammed into her like a brick wall. A full examination. For female officers that included checks for rape and pregnancy… So of course, Janet would have noticed Sam hadn't been living celibate. And knowing Sam and Jack, Janet had had no trouble guessing the rest.

Sam had to hold back the urge to retch when she heard Janet's understanding voice. She knew her friend only meant well. She wanted to help Sam. But right now Sam wanted nothing more than to be left alone. She couldn't even wrap her mind around the fact that _he_ was _gone_ , let alone talk about it. They had just been so close, closer than ever before, and now he wasn't even there anymore? Sam couldn't believe it. Couldn't believe he was gone and she was left behind all alone.

Sam cleared her throat awkwardly. "Can I… um, take a shower?"

It was the first thing Sam could come up with that would get Janet out of the room to leave Sam alone with her emotions and thoughts, something she desperately longed for.

Janet looked at her astonished, as if she had expected anything but this answer. The CMO opened her mouth to start an argument but Sam shot her a stern gaze. "Janet. Don't."

Sam saw her friend mull a few things over in her head but finally she nodded and stepped back, giving Sam some room.

"I've unhooked you from the machines this morning when it seemed you were about to wake up," the CMO said. "You can shower whenever you feel like it. But be careful with your injuries. Only move as much as you feel up to. And the bandages need to be wrapped in plastic so they won't get wet. There's some in the bathroom."

Sam looked down to where Janet pointed and for the first time noticed her arms were wrapped in bandages. Her complete left arm was wrapped up and her right hand, wrist and forearm as well. Probably the external burn wounds Janet had mentioned she had sustained. Sam nodded mechanically.

Janet waited another moment but when Sam made no sign of acknowledging her presence any further than she had done until now, the CMO sighed and retreated. "If you need _anything_ , I'm there for you," Janet stressed.

Sam knew what she meant. She doubted she would ever get herself to talk about it though. Still, Sam nodded again, knowing this was the reaction Janet expected from her. And knowing her as well as she did, Janet saw right through her. Sighing once more, Janet said: "Teal'c sends you his best wishes. He's standing guard at the corridor until you're well enough to receive visitors."

For a moment, Sam wanted to ask about Daniel but then her memory told her Daniel also hadn't survived the Goa'uld's attack. Feeling herself lose control rapidly, Sam turned until she was lying with her back to Janet, burying her head in the white pillow. She didn't want her friend to be around when she finally lost it. She didn't want anyone around. The only person she'd really have allowed to be present was one of those who had died…

The blast door swooshed open and then closed with a _click_ , telling Sam she was finally alone. Frozen, Sam stared forwards, her sight blurring from the tears that were swimming in her eyes but weren't falling. Numb beyond words, Sam tried to come clear; tried to understand what had happened, but her mind was in denial, coming up with one reason after the other why nothing of what she'd heard could be true, despite her _knowing_ it was nothing but the truth.

Finally, after what felt like hours, Sam decided she should probably get on with her initial project: showering. Normally, whenever she returned from a longer mission or ended up in an isolation room because of unconsciousness and/or injury, showering would be the thing that would make her feel revitalized, giving her new energy and determination. It was a sign of being home again and the fact that she could wash off all the grime, dirt and dust from her mission was the end of the mission for her. It enabled Sam put the memories of the last mission behind her, readying her for a new one. Showering after a mission was Sam's way of dealing, of closing one file and preparing for the next one. She had a feeling it wouldn't be that easy with this one, though.

Slowly, Sam stood up and mechanically made her way over to the small bathroom attached to the isolation room. She stepped in and habitually went through her routine. Sam felt her clothes fall to the floor and her feet making their way over and under the spray of water coming from the shower. She felt the water rain down on her, soaking her longer hair and running down her body but Sam didn't even feel the temperature. Was it hot? Or cold? She had no idea. Her body felt so numb, she couldn't even feel it when she experimentally turned the water's control unit from one side to the other. Shrugging it off, Sam just let the water run over her. She stared at the tiles until she finally realized she should probably do something while showering. Routinely, Sam grabbed the shampoo and only then she noticed she had forgotten about her bandages. Now they were thoroughly soaked and Sam was left wondering why her injuries didn't hurt. Normally burn wounds didn't really go all that well with water, and moving her injured arms should probably hurt as well…? But seeing that Sam didn't feel a thing and the bandages were ruined anyways, she continued with her task and worked the shampoo into her hair before she started on the shower gel. It were simple, habitual movements even though she almost hadn't used shampoo and shower gel for half a year. On Laterra, all they'd had had been water and soap.

The simple thought of Laterra finally made the tears roll down her face. It carried so many, many memories, all of them with Jack, that Sam finally felt the loss. The pain was immense. So many happy memories stormed her brain, making her choke on her breath. There also were some unpleasant ones but Sam stubbornly held onto them as well, just because they were memories she had of Jack. And because that was all she would ever have of him again: memories.

Her feelings crashed over Sam like a tsunami wave, making her knees buckle. Weakly, she sank down on the cold tiles of the shower, the water pattering down all around her, washing shampoo and soap off her body. Sam curled into a tight ball, sitting there and feeling completely lost. Never in all she had ever gone through before had she felt so lost and alone. Jack was gone. Daniel was gone. Her dad was on some other planet. Yes, there were Janet and Teal'c and General Hammond, but right now Sam wanted to see neither of them. She wanted Jack. And as always, he was the one she couldn't have. Never again.

Crying out the pain that consumed her wholly, Sam finally wept in the shower. She mourned the friend she had lost, she mourned the love she had lost. She mourned the life she had lost and the relationship she had had, even though only for a short time. She mourned the anchor and the sense in her life she had lost with the man she loved. What was left for her? What reason did she have to go on? She didn't even have her job anymore she could bury herself in! There was nothing left in her life, nothing worth fighting for. Her life was empty. All she really could look forward to was a court-martial for going AWOL and then end her miserable life in some military prison.

Sam leaned her head against the wall when the world started spinning around her, trying to ground herself somehow. She hurt so much. And none of that came from some injury. And there was nothing she could do against it.

Staring ahead numbly while the tears ran freely down her face, Sam realized that this would be all she would still have in her life: her grief. She didn't regret a thing, because Sam knew unfailingly that even if she and Jack would have known beforehand what would have happened to them, they would have still come to the SGC's defense. It was just the way they were: military through and through. Neither of them could stop it any more than they could stop breathing. It was incorporated in the very cells of their bodies. Still, Sam couldn't help but hate the whole situation. The situation where a small, avoidable mistake had taken the man of her dreams from her. They had been so good together. Maybe even too good. Maybe she just wasn't allowed to get that lucky.

Swallowing, Sam idly realized that his death had been absolutely unnecessary. It could have been prevented. There had been no reason for him to die. And yet he wasn't there anymore. She would never see him again. And somehow she had to learn to live with that fact although Sam had no idea how that was supposed to work. Right now she wanted nothing more than to walk in front of a zat, too. The thought of living while he was dead, of having to go through life without him was horrible. Sam couldn't imagine ever seeing sense in life again.

The water stopped abruptly and Sam wondered idly if she'd managed to use up the whole base's water stock, all the while knowing that was complete bullshit her head was sprouting.

"I've found her, sir!" a voice reported. The voice was male but Sam didn't recognize it. She sat shivering on the ground, staring ahead over her knees she had drawn up to her chest, not moving. Something warm and fluffy was draped over her and absentmindedly, Sam recognized one of the SGC's shower towels.

Someone crouched down next to her and wrapped the towel firmly around her. In a reflex, Sam gripped onto the towel and fiercely held on, the towel finally giving her something solid to clutch onto. A face lowered down in front of hers and a man Sam thought she was supposed to recognize studied her worriedly. "Major Carter?" he asked.

Sam looked right back at him but with her shivering lips and her tightly clenched jaw she was unable to answer. Then, thankfully, her head supplied her with the knowledge that Special Agent Malcom Barrett, NID, was the one who had found her in the showers. Sam thought she should probably be embarrassed but found she just didn't care. It didn't matter. What she cared about though was that he had basically interrupted her mourning session. She didn't want company! She wanted to be left alone!

Naturally, he couldn't hear her thoughts, so he just shuffled closer, asking: "Are you hurt? Did you fall?"

Sam looked at him blankly. What did he want from her?

"Don't worry, Major, we'll get you back to your bed and call the Doctor," Barrett assured her.

Sam had enough rationality left over to imagine the tirade she would get to hear from Janet but again she felt nothing at that thought. It was as if she was looking at her situation from the outside, knowing she should feel anger, embarrassment or fear, but she felt so disconnected with her whole surroundings that the sentiments didn't really check in with her.

Barrett heaved her up with some difficulty because Sam wasn't helping him in any way and as gently as he could he walked her back to her bed. Sam complied if only because she lacked the energy to put up a fight.

In the isolation room stood General Hammond, the worry clearly etched into his face. Sam vaguely observed that he looked tired and beaten. "Major Carter," he said relieved the moment he saw her.

"I think she fell in the showers," Barrett informed him and Sam wondered if he really believed that or just said it to spare her from all the sympathy and inquiries that would undoubtedly follow if he told the actual reason why she'd been sitting in the shower.

The General nodded in understanding. "I'll call for Doctor Fraiser," he decided.

Barrett nodded when Sam failed to react and then Sam was steered over to her bed. With the long towel around her body Sam mechanically crawled under the covers. Immediately her wet hair started dripping onto the blanket, leaving dark dots all over the sparkly white covers. Sam watched absentmindedly.

The mattress shifted when Barrett sat down next to her. Sam looked up, only mildly interested. Couldn't he just go and leave her alone to drown in her misery? He smiled at her and then reached out, tucking a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. Sam flinched back when his fingers trailed over her temples. It was a light, innocent touch but Sam's skin crawled, almost causing her to heave, even though she knew her stomach was empty. Although he certainly meant no harm with his touch, Sam felt strangely repulsed by it. She didn't want to be touched and even less by him.

"Are you in pain?" he asked gently.

Feeling considerably warmer and finally able to reply, Sam managed to answer: "No."

She knew he meant physical pain and so her answer was honest. Physically, she didn't feel a thing right now. She knew she had gotten injured and should feel pain but she didn't.

Barrett studied her carefully when he inquired: "Are you okay?"

"No," Sam said detached.

He nodded understandingly. "I can only assume how difficult the situation is for you. But I can assure you, it will get better. You don't have to worry."

Sam felt the irrational urge to laugh. Loud and hysterically. But apparently, her face didn't manage more than the half-frown she imagined herself to be wearing right now. Nothing was going to get better! Because nothing could be changed! She was trapped in a nightmare! And had no way out.

"Do you need something?" he asked, obviously trying to be of any help.

"No," Sam replied.

"If it would help you… I could come and visit you sometime," he offered, sounding hopeful. "You know, to keep you company."

Sam had no need for company at all. And just because she had gone with it so many times already and it apparently worked, she said: "No."

Barrett opened his mouth to say something else when the blast door opened and Janet stormed in, looking furious. General Hammond was right behind her.

Janet shot a side-glance at Barrett and then ordered: "Out!"

Confused, the man stood up when General Hammond began: "Doctor Fraiser–"

Janet shook her head. "I'm sorry, sir, but I _said_ Major Carter is to be left alone to recover! And if there's no emergency, then this includes you as well, sir!"

Defeated by the CMO's orders, the General and Agent Barrett left, leaving an angrily mumbling Janet back with Sam. As soon as they were alone, Janet came over and began to examine Sam to see if she had actually done some damage to herself with her reckless actions. When she saw Sam's dripping wet bandages, she actually scowled. "I don't have to say anything to that, do I?" Janet asked crossly.

"No," Sam answered once more. Every word was one too much, anyways. Silence. Silence was good. Silence felt good.

Sam let Janet work and gazed up at the ceiling. A crack ran from the lamp to one of the walls. It was a small, thin, unspectacular line but Sam recognized the crack. She had spent hours staring up at it before. Suddenly, Sam realized she hadn't only been placed into an isolation room, she'd been put in _the one_ she'd stayed in with the Colonel after their abduction on P3T-643! Again, memories stormed her brain from the time they had spent confined in this room, him trying to regain control over his body, her pretending to sleep so he wouldn't feel watched when she had studied him. Again the tears came and Sam simply let them roll down her face. Janet worked wordlessly and to her relief, Sam saw her go when she was finished. There was no way she hadn't seen Sam's state. But thankfully, she let her be for the moment. Sam couldn't deal with anything more. She needed some time alone. Time to get herself back under control.

So Sam sat in her hospital bed, silently crying over all her losses until exhaustion finally had mercy on her and let her slip into a deep slumber, her last conscious thought a prayer to not have a dream of him. She was hurting enough already as it was.


	53. Interfering

_**Author's notes**_ _: Again, thank you all for reading, following and leaving all those kind words!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Three – Interfering_

Jack awoke with a start. And then groaned. Oh, for cryin' out loud, his head _hurt_! Really, he had never had such a strong, bad headache before, not even when he'd had his first alcohol-induced blackout! Oh god, he really hoped he wasn't going to throw up!

But from the feel of it his head wasn't the only part pounding with pain. His whole body freaking hurt! In fact there wasn't a single place Jack could make out that _didn't_ hurt, so he concluded this wasn't some alcohol overuse he was suffering from.

What the fuck had he actually been doing to end up in such a state…?

Trying his eyes, Jack opened them and looked around. Everything around him was white. White, white and even more white. Jack sighed relieved. If there was something he was familiar with, it was waking up to a white room: the infirmary. But then he stopped. That was wrong. While he'd certainly woken up in enough hospitals to be familiar with white rooms, the SGC's infirmary wasn't white. It was the same dull grey all rooms within Cheyenne Mountain were. And the last place he consciously remembered being had been Cheyenne Mountain and this here certainly wasn't any place within the SGC, so where the hell was he?

Ignoring the pain that all but exploded within his body the moment he even thought of moving, Jack sat up, only to sway noticeably. For a moment he feared he would just crash down on his back once again when a steady arm placed itself around his back and kept him stable.

"So you're up," a well-known voice said.

Jack turned his head and looked right into familiar blue eyes that gazed back warmly. "Daniel…?" the Colonel asked confused, unsure if his eyes were maybe playing a trick on him. Somehow he had the impression he hadn't seen his friend in… forever.

"Hi, Jack. Long time no see," his best friend grinned excitedly, sounding so much like Space-monkey that Jack couldn't question his presence. So why did it actually feel wrong to see him? There was some niggling feeling in the back of his mind that wouldn't leave him alone…

And then the memory hit Jack with the force of a truck. "You're dead!" he exclaimed surprised, looking at Daniel as if his friend had suddenly grown a second head.

Daniel raised an eyebrow. "Why, hello to you, too, Daniel. How are you?" he nudged Jack pointedly but the Colonel wouldn't bite to the bantering.

Sighing, Daniel grumbled: "Yes, I'm dead. Thank you for reminding me of it."

Jack gulped uncomfortably. "What… happened?" he finally asked when the silence stretched.

Daniel shrugged. "Jaffa shot me in the back when I threw the message to you through the Stargate. I died on the ramp in front of the Stargate."

Jack dry-swallowed, once again. Daniel reported it quite detached but Jack couldn't stand hearing from one of his friends' death. Even if, apparently, from the dead guy in question himself…

"We got your message," he murmured.

Daniel nodded. "Yeah, I know," he said and upon Jack's completely confused gaze, he explained: "I kinda watched you guys."

Jack had a hard time wrapping his head around what Daniel was talking about and inwardly asked himself if, maybe, he'd gotten badly injured on a mission, or even while training in the SGC's gym, and they had put him under some heavy drugs and he'd actually just dreamed up the whole thing?

"It's actually possible to watch people on Earth from heaven…?" Jack asked the first thing that came to his mind. Well, after the whole shit with the Goa'uld, the last thing Jack would have expected to be greeted with after his death was an afterlife in heaven. Well, at least he hadn't gone straight to hell. Apparently saving your planet was enough good karma to make up for lusting after your 2IC and quite literally screwing the frat regs with her…

Daniel looked at him as if he tried his best to not laugh at Jack. "Jack, we're not in heaven," he said.

Jack raised an eyebrow. "Oh? I always thought white equaled heaven and hell was red…?"

Daniel still smiled, obviously trying his best to stay calm. "Jack, this is neither heaven nor hell. Nothing like that exists. And the place here is only white because you make it so. This is your place, so it looks like what you're imagining it to look like."

Jack almost groaned. How come Daniel's explanations often tended to make it all so much more complicated? "Danny-boy, quit the esoteric shit and tell me straight: have I died?" he demanded. Actually, that was the only explanation Jack could think of why he was sitting next to his supposedly dead friend.

Daniel chuckled while looking at him fondly. "Not quite," the archaeologist answered. "Your healing powers do an amazing job at keeping you alive but they will fail sometime soon. You've spent too much energy on healing Sam."

Jack shuddered, but not because of his soon-to-be death but rather because of… "Sam!" he shouted. "How's she? Is she here, too?"

Daniel shook his head. "No," he said. "She's made it. The SGC made a deal with Nirrti: they let her and Ares go back through the Stargate and for that she's healed Sam with the SGC's Goa'uld healing device."

Jack gaped at Daniel while slowly anger and confusion began to take hold over him. He didn't even know what was more appalling to him: that the SGC was willing to make a deal with a Goa'uld (even though this deal had seemingly saved Sam's life and for that he was grateful) or that they hadn't thought of concluding _him_ into the deal…

Apparently, Daniel could see it and set to explain further: "Cheyenne Mountain has closed off after the foothold situation until it's all cleared up. This also meant no gate travel, so they couldn't contact the Tok'ra. And since Sam is the only one on base, who's able to use Goa'uld technology, nobody else but Nirrti could heal her. They thought you dead already, Jack, or they would have tried to save you, too. Janet examined you but you had already stopped breathing and your heart stopped beating on the way to the infirmary, so there was nothing she could do than declare you dead."

Jack sighed and raked a hand through his hair. This was all so confusing! He felt bad for the Napoleonic power monger, who would undoubtedly blame herself for his death. Even though, apparently, he wasn't really dead, from what Daniel had said?

And then there was Sam. Although Jack was seriously glad she had made it through and he would have given his life to have her survive any time, he knew unfailingly what it would mean for her. She was probably under arrest and maybe already aware that he hadn't made it through. She would have to deal with confinement again as well as his and Daniel's death. This time, she would be all alone. He wasn't there with her anymore. He couldn't ever be there for her anymore.

And going by his own feelings, Jack assumed it would slowly kill her. Everything had been ripped from her: her life, her free will, her closest friends. At least Teal'c was still with her, Jack tried to reassure himself. The Jaffa would undoubtedly do all he could for her.

Again, Jack sighed and looked over to his friend, who was still steadying him with a hand. "I thought you said I hadn't died yet?" he inquired, confused why the SGC would think him dead.

"You haven't," Daniel answered. "But you've exhausted your whole energy. Each last drop your body can conjure up is going into your healing, so all other physical reactions, even your breathing and heartbeat, have temporarily stopped. If you ask me, that is a really fascinating reaction! It is almost similar to an animal's hibernation or Teal'c's kel-no-reem. I wonder if–"

"Daniel!" Jack all but screamed. Even in afterlife, the archaeologist apparently couldn't stop annoying Jack out of his skull with his technobabble!

Daniel snickered by the oh-so-typical Jack-reaction. "No, you're not dead. You're stubbornly holding on," he clarified. "But you can't heal yourself anymore. You don't have enough energy left over."

"So I _will_ die," Jack said emphasized.

"Eventually? Yes," Daniel nodded.

"Great!" Jack grumbled sarcastically. Just his luck! He'd finally had all he could have dreamed for in his life and then he died! At least this time fate had had mercy on him and made him go, not some person close to him. If it had been Sam to have died? Jack wasn't sure if he had been willing to go on, even more so when Daniel had also been dead.

Pissed off, Jack motioned around with his hand. "So then where exactly are we? Are we supposed to spend our afterlife _here_?"

Daniel grinned. "No, not really. I told you there was no afterlife. We're simply on another level of existence."

Jack looked at him blankly. "We're… what?"

Daniel sighed and contemplated for a moment how he could explain it best. Then his face lit up. "Ah, do you remember Orlin, Jack?" he asked.

Jack raised an eyebrow, telling Daniel pretty much he had no idea what the archaeologist was talking about. "The ghostly guy that was haunting Sam?" Daniel explained.

"Oh, you mean the one that could turn into energy and was of the opinion he was dating Carter?" Jack grouched. Yeah, that had been an experience he hadn't tried very hard to remember. There was just nothing like standing in front of her door, dragging Daniel and Teal'c along to pretend they were about to do a team night, just so he could check on her, and getting told she was having a date! Jack could still remember vaguely that while he had stubbornly held on to his calm façade for that day, he had thoroughly dressed down some poor, innocent Lieutenant the next day in a childish fit of temper only to be able to vent some of his anger somewhere. Somewhere Carter wouldn't see it.

"So what about him?" Jack grumbled, not really pleased to have been reminded of that incident. And the amazing loss of self-control he had shown.

"He claimed he was an Ancient who had ascended to a higher form of life," Daniel said.

Aaaand even more of the esoteric crap, Jack thought inwardly. What was it with those cryptic, pseudo-mysterious explanations nobody believed anyways? Still, deciding to trust his friend, Jack nodded, indicating for Daniel to go on.

"It's true," the archaeologist said simply. "The Ancients really have developed to a level where they could leave their physical bodies behind and rise to a form of pure energy, making them immortal. Now they exist on a higher level of existence and have an overview of all happenings in the galaxies."

"Yeah, sounds… nice and all, but what does that actually have to do with us?" Jack asked.

Daniel shook his head good-naturedly. "You know? When I died, I did it in full knowledge that this would be the end," Daniel revealed. "After all we've seen I didn't believe in something like an afterlife anymore. And yet when I had died, I had found myself standing next to my corpse."

Jack looked at him alienated. "Really?"

Daniel nodded. "Yeah. And there was someone with me there: Oma Desala."

Now Jack was surprised. He remembered the ethereal being they had encountered while searching for the Harsesis child. So had she actually been an Ancient? Was that what he had to imagine the Ancients to be like? What Orlin had been like? Well, that was just proving him right once more: Carter had _no_ taste in men!

"She made me an offer," Daniel continued, unaware of where Jack's thoughts had travelled. "She said I was… _advanced_ for a human and if I would be able to ascend, she would take me with her."

Yes, Jack thought inwardly, that sounded exactly like the kind of thing Daniel would fall for.

Daniel shrugged. "I really had no idea how to… ascend, but she gave me some instructions and seeing that I haven't disappeared, I apparently succeeded."

"So that explains, why _you're_ here," Jack summed it up pointedly.

Daniel agreed with a vague sound. "As an ascended being you can see and watch _everything_. You are aware of everything that is happening and you can _follow_ everything. You know of everything that is about to happen. But you're not allowed to interfere," Daniel explained. "You have to let everything play out the way fate and time intended it to be. The Ancients aren't tolerating any interference."

Jack knew Daniel was telling him why he hadn't been able to do anything to come to their help and with a curt gesture he clapped his hand on the other man's shoulder to tell him nonverbally he understood.

"Sounds like fun," he said.

Daniel shrugged noncommittal. "But then you died…" he murmured. "You rescued Sam and were slowly dying yourself."

A haunted look appeared in Daniel's eyes and the Colonel asked himself how much it had hurt him to have to watch, knowing he couldn't do a damn thing about it.

"Yeah…" Jack said slowly. "I kinda remember getting shot down by a zat. Twice, if I'm right."

Daniel nodded confirmative. "You were incredibly lucky. There was enough time between the two shots that your healing abilities could repair enough of the damage so that second shot wasn't immediately fatal."

"Not _immediately_? Oh yes, that's really what I'd call _lucky_ : to see my own body fail and have to _watch myself die!_ " Jack remarked sarcastically.

Daniel nodded absentmindedly and then, silently, added: "I understand. I have to watch, too."

Stumped, Jack halted in whatever he had been about to say. He could practically feel how much it had hurt his friend to have to observe Jack falling under friendly fire, knowing all the while what it would do to his friend.

"I couldn't just stand by and do nothing," Daniel admitted. "So I pleaded with Oma to help you the way she did with me. Since you were badly hurt, you couldn't ascend on your own and so she let you rise to the next level. I am here to welcome you, so to say…"

Now Jack really gaped at his friend. " _What?!_ " he all but exploded. "Oh no! Lemme get this straight, Danny-boy! Not that I'm not grateful for you saving my sorry ass but there is no fucking chance in hell I'm going to sit by on the sidelines for all eternity and watch without being allowed to actually _do_ anything!"

Jack just knew he would break the rules at the first chance he'd get. Not that the thought of seeing Carter again wouldn't be tempting but Jack knew himself good enough to be sure that the first time she, the SGC or Earth would be in danger from those bloody annoying Goa'uld he would give a shit about the rules and interfere.

"Come on," Daniel cajoled. "I know this isn't exactly your style but–"

Jack shook his head determined. " _Not exactly my style?_ Daniel, how can anyone even _stand_ that?!" he growled.

Daniel squared his shoulders, a firm look passing over his expression. "I'll show you," he said.

Suddenly all the white around them vanished and in a whirlwind of colors Jack could feel them travel. When the world around them stopped once more, Jack had to take only one look to know they were standing in one of the SGC's isolation rooms. Daniel was standing next to him, a hand still attached to Jack's shoulder, although the Colonel felt considerably more stable by now. The pain he had been in had seriously lessened and was by now only a throbbing sensation cursing through his body. Absentmindedly, Jack asked himself if that was a good or rather bad sign.

"You can do whatever you want," Daniel said quietly. "Although we're really here, nobody can see or hear us."

Jack looked up to the corner of the wall where he knew the surveillance camera hung but since nobody came charging in to point weapons at them, he assumed what Daniel had told him to be the truth. Slowly, Jack turned, taking in all the familiar sights of one of the SGC's rooms. He knew every corner and crack in the wall but seeing that he had been gone from the SGC for about half a year, it was a strange feeling to be back. Almost… alien.

Jack did another turn and froze in his tracks. His head actually needed a moment to catch on but then his feet moved on his own accord. Daniel hadn't just brought him to some isolation room, he had brought them to _her_ isolation room!

Jack stopped at the hospital bed placed in the middle of the room and looked down on Carter's still, sleeping form. As uncountable times before, she was hooked up to machines that surveilled her signs of life and an IV stood behind her bed, unused but there to provide her with fluids and meds should the need arise. Jack was immensely relieved by the steady heartbeat the monitor of the machine placed next to her bed showed off. She looked like shit, with dark circles under her eyes, her skin sickeningly white and her lips tinged with a blue hue, but at least she was alive. The arm that was lying above her blanket was tightly wrapped in bandages and Jack realized that it was the one she had put onto the Stargate in that reckless move that had nearly cost her her life. He still remembered the heart attack he had almost gotten at seeing what she had been doing. He still remembered the overwhelming urge to hit her for doing what she'd done when he'd seen her fall, when the Stargate had finally died down. And he still remembered the crushing, overpowering worry he'd felt, thinking she wouldn't make it.

Looking down at her, Jack was suddenly overwhelmed by immense regret. He didn't regret dying. He didn't regret leaving her back. He felt sorry for that but he didn't regret it. What he did regret however was that he had never told her. He had never told her how much he loved her when he had still had the time. They had been given months together and never had he used an opportunity to tell her. Now she would never know.

Daniel stepped up to him and again laid a hand on his shoulder. Jack swallowed uncomfortably and then asked awkwardly: "Um… can I… touch…?"

"She won't feel it but you can touch her," Daniel said.

Jack hesitated but then reached out a hand and laid his fingers on her cheek. He felt the resistance of touching a solid object but that was about all he felt. He couldn't feel the softness of her skin or her body's warmth. And she didn't feel his presence at all. Strangely, Jack felt even more deprived than before and drew his hand back.

"I'm sorry, Carter…" he murmured, even though he was unsure what exactly he was apologizing for. And knowing that she wouldn't hear his words was making it even hollower.

"That's what makes it worth enduring," Daniel said quietly next to him. "Seeing them again. Knowing what is happening to them, even though we're not with them anymore."

Jack disagreed. To him, it was another form of torture. To see her but not be able to touch her? To watch her but not be able to speak with her? To see her struggle, fight, endure and not be able to help her? That was a nightmare straight from hell and not the honor Jack was pretty sure the Ancients considered his ascension.

"I can't do that!" Jack exclaimed brusquely and pushed away from Carter's sickbed. Daniel followed him, not taking his hand off of Jack's shoulder and for the first time Jack thought it to be annoying instead of reassuring. What was with the amount of touching the archaeologist was showing? If Jack was right, then they still had all eternity in each other's company, so there was no need for all that touchy-feely stuff, was there?

"No?" Daniel asked sadly.

Jack shook his head. He'd rather be dead than to have to watch Carter from the sidelines for the rest of their lives. He rather didn't want to know at all than having to witness everything from the first rows without having any say in the matters at all.

"Daniel, I'd rather be dead!" Jack admitted.

He could see the hurt look on his friend's face but that didn't change anything about the way Jack felt. He was sorry for what he put Daniel through but there was no way he would stay around only _to watch_.

Daniel came to stand in front of him and put both hands on Jack's shoulders. His eyes were swimming in tears but he was smiling. "I can't say I'm surprised," Daniel said. "But I can't just let you die, Jack. I'm sorry."

"Daniel, if you think that–!" Jack began furious but he was cut off when something that felt like a brick wall slammed into his body. Jack gasped and cringed when the pain came back doubly but Daniel held onto his shoulders with a determined expression.

" _Oh, for cryin'…!_ " Jack panted, trying to straighten up once more before focusing on his friend. "Daniel, what are you doing?!"

Daniel looked at him strangely calm. "Interfering," he said simply. "You're not dead yet, Jack. You need energy for your healing powers to pull you through. So I'm giving you mine. After all, energy is all we are up here…"

Jack gritted his teeth, trying his best to not lose consciousness thanks to the unbearable pain.

"But I thought… you're not allowed…!" he stuttered.

"I'm not," Daniel admitted. "And I will pay the price. But at least then you'll have survived."

Daniel looked at him with a peaceful, relaxed expression on his face. "Go back, Jack. Go and help Sam. Be there for her. This is all I can do for you two."

"Daniel–!" Jack protested but it was too late. He could feel Daniel's energy slam into his body with such a force Jack lost consciousness immediately.

When he awoke again, he had no idea how much time had passed but oddly, Jack remembered everything. Lying on his back, Jack felt decidedly better. The pain was gone, replaced by a familiar soreness in his body that told Jack his Ancient genes had done a thorough job of healing him. Physically, he expected to be fine. Emotionally, he felt like having gone through a rollercoaster. _Daniel…!_

Jack felt tears prick at the corner of his eyes. He had no idea what had happened to his friend but strangely Jack could understand his actions. It was so typically Daniel and if Jack had been in his stead, he would've probably done the same, if he was honest. And while Jack felt the familiar urge to go and kick his friend's ass for having acted recklessly on his own and disregarding any wishes Jack might have had on the situation, he respected Daniel's decision. He had done what he had felt to be right for the team, for their little family. Still, he was going to hear it from him if they met again in the afterlife!

But now, Jack had another team mate he had to look after. Focusing, Jack pushed the worry and the concern for Daniel back, far off into a corner of his mind, intending to deal with it later. Much, much later.

Sitting up, Jack wasn't really surprised to be greeted with the SGC's characteristic grey walls. He was surprised however by the silence that hung in the room's air. Nobody was here. Confused, Jack looked around. He was lying on a bare, flat surface with a flimsy excuse of a blanket drawn over his body. From the medical look of things, he was in the infirmary as the room resembled an OP more than the usual recovery rooms. It only clicked for Jack when he noticed the rectangular shapes of brushed steel all over one of the walls. The mortuary! His body had been placed in the morgue to be prepared for his funeral! Okay, he _should_ have expected that given Daniel's explanations but still he couldn't help but be offended!

Crossing his arms in front of his chest, Jack yelled indignantly: "Hey! I'm not dead yet, y'know?!"

All the while knowing nobody would hear him in here anyways.

* * *

 _A/N: So, the turning point you all were waiting and hoping for?_


	54. Assessing

_**Author's notes**_ _: Thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Four – Assessing_

Jack drummed his fingers on the table in front of him irritated. There was nothing in the plain interrogation room that could hold his attention and looking at the same grey wall for minutes was bound to get boring sooner or later. Really, given how well these people here knew him, he would have at least expected to find his yo-yo here.

Two days had passed since his miraculous resurrection from the dead. In this time he had scared the hell out of the poor Airman stationed closest to the mortuary when he had walked out of the room. Okay, so maybe he had staggered but given what his poor body had been through at that time, Jack was proud of himself that he had managed to get out of there on his own two feet. Then he had shocked the hell out of the Napoleonic power monger when he had turned out alive and kicking. Going by her reaction though, she had been genuinely happy. When she had finished putting him through a marathon of examinations that revealed that he was indeed himself and alive, she had burst into tears, hugging him and declaring she was glad to see him. Jack had never seen the hardass woman that emotional and honestly it had kinda given him the creeps. After the examinations he had been placed into an isolation room under close observation, where he had taken care of his last minor injuries Daniel hadn't cured with his rather brutal method of healing, but Jack hadn't expected anything else than being placed into custody. It was SOP. As was the interrogation he could look forward to, now.

General Hammond had come to see him once but only to assure himself of Jack's well-being, so Jack assumed he would now be asked to tell his perspective of what had happened the past months. He wouldn't have minded to fill the blanks if his mood hadn't been so sour, but Jack was pissed off. He was back at the SGC for two days and he hadn't seen a hair of Carter! He hadn't been allowed anywhere near where she could remotely be and nobody had answered his questions about her, either. By now Jack was half-way seriously contemplating to just break a door and go looking for her himself.

The door to the isolation room opened before Jack could begin to make a plan out of that stray thought. In walked two SF's who took position left and right from the door, but Jack merely spared them a side-glance. He knew that with his strength the only thing threatening about them were the automatic machineguns hanging on their chests.

Then entered General Hammond and routinely Jack stood at attention. He was followed by a man Jack didn't know, Agent Barrett from the NID and Senator Kinsey. Jack's eyes lingered on the unknown stranger for a while, taking in his features, before the brown-haired man went to stand with General Hammond. They took positions at the wall opposite of Jack's seat and Jack followed them with his eyes. He vaguely remembered seeing the man next to General Hammond in the briefing room where they had been held by the Jaffa, but even without that obvious hint Jack would have immediately known he was someone high ranking. The aura of confidence and self-assurance he was giving off told of it.

"General Hammond, sir," Jack acknowledged his former CO as the military code demanded.

"At ease, son," the General said softly and Jack smirked at the feeling of familiarity he got from these words. It was as if the SGC was welcoming him back in the form of the General.

Jack loosened the tense way he stood. Meanwhile, Kinsey and Barrett stepped up to the small table Jack had been sitting at, indicating they were the ones to do the questioning in the interrogation. Jack almost scowled at the other man when the pompous Senator sat down self-righteously.

"Agent Barrett," Jack greeted politely before he sat down himself. Kinsey obviously waited for a greeting, too, but Jack ignored him. As far as he was concerned, the good Senator could go to hell and stay there. For a moment Jack considered greeting the unknown man, just to spite Kinsey and be childish, but since he had no idea who he was or in what function he was attending this little shindig here, he decided against it.

Jack turned to face Barrett but quite a bit of his attention stayed on General Hammond and the stranger, who hovered unobtrusively in the background.

"Colonel O'Neill," the Agent smiled amicably. "It's good to have you back alive."

Jack still wasn't fond of the man but on one hand he knew this was mostly due to the interest the other man had in Carter and on the other hand he would prefer Barrett any day over Kinsey. So Jack condescended to an answering nod.

"How are you?" Barrett asked, obviously trying to be polite, but before Jack could answer with any set phrase along the lines of 'fine', Kinsey interrupted. "We have all read the medical reports on the Colonel," he admonished. "We know he's fit for this interrogation."

Barrett frowned at the Senator and opened his mouth, probably to tell the other man that this wasn't why he had asked the question, but Kinsey wasn't sparing him any attention. He turned towards Jack, a determined, hungry expression in his eyes Jack so didn't like.

"Colonel, you have been gone for months," Kinsey stated with a voice that was bordering on an accusation. "We want to know where you were, what you did and who you interacted with. Also, we need to know what that thing behind the Stargate is Sergeant Siler stumbled into!"

Jack almost smiled. Of course they wanted to know that. Jack was aware what questions he would be asked, because he himself would have asked the same. Of course the Air Force wanted to know, because they needed to determine whether he had committed any more serious breaches of security they could add to the court-martial that was looming for him.

Jack knew General Hammond was only here to find out if he had in any way to prepare for someone else to come knocking on the iris or any danger threatening the SGC, but the relaxed way he stood told Jack he wasn't really expecting it. The General knew Jack well enough to know Jack would have rather died himself than give any information over to a possible enemy of the SGC and he still trusted his former 2IC. Jack felt strangely honored to have the backup of such a great man.

Barrett was obviously here, because the NID was yet again making an interrogation, but Jack wasn't sure what Kinsey's motives were for being present. Of course it could be the good Senator felt threatened in his own security knowing what Jack could have possibly let slip to hostile aliens but actually then Jack expected the other man to be the first to search a hole he could hide within rather than sitting here, at the front lines, and questioning him. Maybe he was using Jack to get the SGC into discredit and finally prove the Program's incompetence?

"Colonel? Did you understand the question?" Kinsey urged him, ripping him from his thoughts in which Jack just imagined Siler trying to repair the damage Carter had caused to the Stargate's wiring and run smack into the invisible glider.

Jack looked at him, raising an eyebrow. Did the man think him stupid or something? Or was he just blindly prodding for a reaction from Jack, hoping to get him angry and spill a few things? Well, Jack thought smirking, so not happening. This time, Kinsey _wanted_ something from _him_ and Jack had next to no intention to give him _anything_. Instead, he would enjoy keeping him on his toes, making him flail like a fish on the hook.

"Where's Carter?" Jack asked instead, completely ignoring the Senator's question.

As expected, the Senator bristled at Jack's complete lack of cooperation. "Major Carter is no matter of this interrogation!" Kinsey snapped at him.

"That's where we disagree," Jack answered calmly.

"Colonel O'Neill! The question was where you–!"

"Where's Carter?" Jack interrupted once again, very much enjoying the way a vein began throbbing at the other, enraged man's temple.

"Colonel O'Neill–" Kinsey tried again, but again Jack cut in, countering: "Carter?"

Kinsey jumped up so that his chair scraped over the ground with an aggravating noise and slamming his hands down on the table he got into Jack's face. "Colonel O'Neill! Do I have to remind you in what a serious situation you are? You _will_ cooperate–"

Jack slowly got up, rising to his full height which made him tower over the smaller man, and crossing his arms in front of his chest he stared down at the Senator intimidatingly. He noticed with a satisfying feeling how the other man drew back, bringing the distance of the table in between them again. Yep, superhuman powers had their upsides.

"Senator Kinsey," Jack growled back emphasized. "As far as I am concerned, it was your sorry ass too I rescued from the Goa'uld, so I don't owe you anything. In fact _you're_ the one who's in debt to _me_."

"How dare you!" Kinsey raged. "That's no behavior for a military prisoner! Remember your position, Colonel!"

Jack raised his eyebrows curiously. "Didn't know I was a prisoner," he drawled.

Kinsey snorted. "Well, what did you expect after deserting? A welcome back party?"

"After rescuing Earth from a Goa'uld infiltration? Why not?" Jack asked, silently appreciating how Kinsey fumed to his taunting. It was so easy to push the other man's buttons!

"Of course _not_!" Kinsey stated. "You are right where you belong after your audacious actions!"

Jack cocked his head amused. "Dear Senator, I'm sure you've read all the reports about me that are out there, didn't you?" he began. "So what makes you think I would _stay_ imprisoned if I didn't want to be here? With my powers I could be gone any time. So consider it my way of cooperation that I am here, talking with _you_ , of all people!"

Jack knew he could break out of the SGC anytime with his strength but honestly he had no intention of doing so. First of all, the SGC was something like a second home to him and he valued many people who worked here and he wanted none of them to get into trouble because he was his usual egoistic self. Second, Carter was still here somewhere and he wouldn't ever just go and leave her to her fate. Third, he wanted to right the chaos he had caused, if only to get Carter free of any and all accusations. So Jack had no intention of leaving. But that didn't mean he had to tell that Kinsey. Why not make the man sweat a little bit?

"Colonel O'Neill! Get in line! Or I have to–!" Kinsey began when he was interrupted by the stranger in the background. "Oh _please_ , Bob!" the man said exasperated. "Can't you see the Colonel is playing with you?"

Oh, so he had noticed, Jack thought mildly surprised. He was rather sure General Hammond and Agent Barrett had caught on to his motives rather fast going by the lack of interrupting they had done, but the stranger? He had no means of knowing Jack's character but obviously had good observation skills.

Now the stranger stepped forwards and immediately Kinsey stood and made room for the other man, which only heightened Jack's suspicions that he was confronted with someone of the high brass.

Kinsey began to pace through the room infuriated while the stranger sat down in his chair, motioning for Jack to do the same. Jack did so, albeit skeptically.

"Colonel O'Neill," the stranger began with a calm, relaxed air around him.

"And you are?" the Colonel asked back flatly.

The stranger smiled. "Henry Hayes," he introduced himself.

Yup, Jack thought. Even the name didn't ring a bell. He had officially never met the guy before. "NID?" he questioned suspiciously.

The man called Hayes snorted. "Hardly," he answered. "I belong to the Washington brass."

Jack was aware that while the man had given him an answer, he was avoiding giving a _straight_ answer. In fact he had probably only answered, because he had guessed that Jack would tell him as much as he'd revealed to Kinsey if he wouldn't get him to trust him. And Jack only trusted people he could assess. But even the elusive answer he'd gotten told Jack a few things. Hayes was someone in charge. Someone, who could, and would, decide over whether he would continue to get paid by the Air Force or spend the rest of his life in a military prison. And just like Jack himself, Hayes was still trying to get a picture of him, probably investigating whether or not Jack was still a threat to Earth.

"So?" Hayes said quietly. "You want to tell us what has happened to you those last months?"

Jack stayed silent, contemplating. But eventually, he began speaking. Truthfully, he reported about his escape with Carter, their planet-hopping until they settled on their temporary home, the base they had found, how they had discovered that it was from the Ancients and how they had gotten it running. He explained about their food-raids and even mentioned the one time where they had stumbled over SG-1 and SG-3. He told Hayes how Daniel had contacted them when the Goa'uld had taken over hold of the SGC and how they had figured out a way to come to the SGC's rescue. And then he described what they had done after they had arrived at the SGC up to the point he had been zatted down – something he was still fuming about. If he ever got his hands on this inept rookie…! But there were a few things Jack didn't reveal, no matter how much Hayes was digging and rephrasing his questions. He never revealed Laterra's address. He didn't speak of the role Daniel had played in his resurrection. He used Daniel's words when he had to explain how he had managed to survive and stated his body had halted his breath and heartbeat until he had managed to heal himself, but he never mentioned Daniel. And Jack never said a word about anything that had happened between him and Carter.

Jack knew Hayes was aware he was holding things back, so he tried to be as open and honest with everything else to show his good will. Jack observed the man closely and although he had a pretty good poker face, Jack soon got the hang of reading the little signs he gave away. He also kept an eye on General Hammond, who was shifting from time to time to Jack's words, and Agent Barrett's reactions, who was recording the whole interrogation. Jack still ignored Kinsey and his attitude, although they were requiring quite some room in the small interrogation room, but he kept tabs on the way he reacted, as if he was reading a barometer.

Finally, Hayes nodded satisfied. "Thank you for your cooperation, Colonel," he said.

Jack looked at him pointedly, as if reminding him of a quid pro quo. Hayes smiled, a wide grin Jack would have liked if he had any idea if the man would turn out friend or foe.

"Major Carter is well, conscious and recovering. You will see her soon," Hayes stated. With that, Hayes stood, getting the whole room to move. Kinsey stopped pacing, Barrett packed his things and the General came to stand with the group.

On their move out, Hayes turned and fixed Jack with a hard stare. "Oh, and Colonel?" he said amicably but Jack wasn't fooled. What was about to follow would be either a direct order or a threat. "I am sure you will cooperate with the SGC?"

Jack stared back with a glare of his own. He had never been one to be intimidated by the higher ups. He knew that Hayes was referring to what Jack had taunted Kinsey with: that he could go anytime he wanted. But just like with Kinsey, Jack wasn't inclined to give the man any insight into his plans.

"For the time being? Yes," he answered. As long as he hadn't assured himself of Carter's well-being, he wouldn't risk a thing.

Hayes nodded, apparently satisfied, and left the interrogation room with all others aside from the SF's who would escort Jack back to the isolation room he'd spent the last two days in.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

"I want to speak with Major Carter," Hayes said determined as soon as they were out of earshot of the interrogation room.

"Now?" General Hammond at his side simply asked.

Hayes nodded and immediately the General changed routes, leading them to the isolation room Hayes knew she was held in. They were walking slowly but Hayes didn't mind. In fact he had a suspicion General Hammond was doing this on purpose, so Hayes had some time to get his thoughts on Colonel O'Neill straight, but seeing that he seemed to need the time, Hayes wasn't inclined to object.

The Colonel had been one fascinating character. Hayes hadn't met a person like him in quite some time. In fact, the higher he had risen on the political ladder, the more docile people usually got with him. 'Yes, Mr. President this; yes, Mr. President that' was all he got to hear nowadays. So the open skepticism and even the blatant refusal to answer a few of his questions the Colonel had shown towards him when he had dug around a little was actually quite refreshing. There weren't many people left who stuck up to him, and even less when they found out he was the President of the United States. Aside from his wife and a few old, close friends nobody dared to go against his opinion, fearing the repercussions, although Henry was far from condemning someone because of their opinion.

But Colonel O'Neill was special. Even though Hayes had been careful to not reveal who he was, he had the distinct impression the Colonel had just guessed the answer. Henry wasn't sure if he would really suspect him to be the President himself, but at the very least he had guessed him to be a high ranking politician in charge of his interrogation. Still, even while knowing who he could be, it hadn't even crossed the man's mind to try and get on his good side, even though he was clearly aware that he could be in for a court-martial. No, going by the impression Hayes had gotten of the man and the description he had from George, Colonel O'Neill gave a shit about positions and ranks. He had no scruple insulting a Senator and no difficulties speaking up to a higher-up. It was this kind of attitude Hayes really liked. Because it were those people he could trust on to be honest with him at all times. Wherever he could, Hayes had made sure to get such people into high positions, making them responsible for all important areas, because he could trust these people to make the right decisions whether he, as the President, approved of them or not. He was only one person and he wasn't right in everything he said and did, no matter what all those bootlickers were telling him constantly. He was one person and he couldn't be everywhere at once. So he needed good people he could trust implicitly to act in his stead. And Henry was pretty sure by now that Colonel O'Neill would be one of these people. He liked the man's no-nonsense attitude and his choice in character. He obviously liked General Hammond, seeing how he treated his CO with respect despite what his military folder claimed about repeated insubordination. He obviously hated Kinsey and actually, that was a sentiment Hayes could sympathize with. O'Neill was wary of Barrett and had been careful with Hayes himself, which spoke of an analyzing and skeptical nature. From what Hayes had observed, Colonel O'Neill was no person you could _get_ to like you. He assessed you and when he came to a conclusion, he decided whether or not he liked you. If he decided to like you, Hayes believed him to be a very loyal person, seeing how he had returned to the SGC to rescue Earth despite knowing that only confinement or death could await him and his 2IC. If he didn't like you, he probably didn't spare you any time or attention. But if he came to loathe you, Hayes didn't doubt for a second that Colonel O'Neill could be a very tiresome enemy.

So, put in a nutshell, O'Neill was exactly the type of man Hayes respected. He could understand that O'Neill's attitude tended to get him into trouble within the strict military, but still the President couldn't help but imagine him to make an outstanding career within the Air Force. He could get far. If circumstances would let him. And seeing that General Hammond had appointed him to be this base's 2IC, Hayes guessed the man agreed with his thoughts on that. The SGC was the very front line, Earth's first line of defense from the outer space, so here more than anywhere else they needed tough men who could handle themselves, any situations occurring and the bureaucrats at Washington. General Hammond was a very good choice Hayes still congratulated his predecessor for but the General wouldn't run the Program forever. Maybe a few more years and then? Who would take over? Someone like Kinsey and they could kiss Earth's independence good-bye! Since he'd been 2IC, Colonel O'Neill would have been a logical choice and one that, now that he'd gotten to know the man, Hayes would have fully supported, but yeah, now there was the slight problem of his desertion, which was practically writing him up for a court-martial which would, in the best case, end with a forced retirement. And honestly, this wasn't really fitting into Hayes' plans. He had no intention of letting one of those few good men go, now that he'd found them. But, despite being the President, Hayes didn't make the rules. The Air Force had specific regulations that were there for good, valid reasons and he had no intentions of going against one of these.

Sighing, Hayes realized he had gotten into a quite tight spot. He liked the Colonel and he could imagine working together with him in the near future. Actually, given the reports Hayes had read on SG-1's achievements and the Colonel's and Major Carter's extraordinary changes, Hayes knew it would be insane to not have these two officers at the front lines, where their talents would be of best use. They had just proven how good they really were when they had freed the SGC from the Goa'uld's hold, something the whole military base itself had failed in!

And Hayes had even been present, having sat in the very front row when the Goa'uld had attacked. He had witnessed everything firsthand. Given, in the beginning he hadn't really been worried when the alarms had gone off in the base, seeing that this seemed to be a reoccurring event here. He had begun to worry though when General Hammond had come sprinting back, armed with a machinegun. And he had been seriously worried when there had been Jaffa on the other man's heels that had begun shooting at them. Hayes had lost about half a dozen Secret Service Agents in the short battle that had ensued and he regretted each one of these men falling, knowing that they all had families that would mourn their deaths. But soon, Henry Hayes had realized that this had merely been the beginning. Together with General Hammond, who had been spared by the Jaffa most likely because he was the Commander of the base, he had been walked to the briefing room to get chained to a railing. Together, they had had to watch how one after the other, fellow officers and civilian scientists had been brought in. Some wounded, some unconscious, some unharmed. But all those that had been able to talk had brought bad news, about this officer falling or that soldier dying. Hayes had lost count pretty soon, all those unfamiliar names blurring together in his head. But he had seen the way all others in the room had mourned the fallen. They had known them all, had worked with them for years maybe and it had hurt them all to know of their deaths. Hayes had seen the anger, the rage and the hate those men had felt towards the enemy, but just like him, neither of them could have done anything in their situation. They had been captured, greatly outnumbered by the enemy, and had been left to contemplate what might happen now. Having just been briefed on the Stargate Program, Hayes had known what would be SOP. And, ironically, if it hadn't been for his presence, the army would have probably bombed the base immediately. They would have nuclear-blasted their enemies into oblivion. But the President of the United States had been there and so they had waited. Then again, Hayes had known, it wouldn't help them in any way other than to give the enemy more time for their attack on Earth and he remembered having wished for the military forces to get it over with already.

But then Doctor Jackson had come up with this reckless plan. Given, in hindsight, it had worked out astonishingly good, even if, in the beginning, it had sounded and looked like such an insane idea that Hayes had seriously questioned General Hammond's state of mind when the two-star General had given his okay. Now Hayes knew that, compared with how SG-1 usually handled things, the General had done nothing other than to trust his flagship team. And they hadn't let the General down. Doctor Jackson had died in his attempt to get a message through to Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, who the whole base had considered their last resource, but the moment the whole electricity around the base had gone extinct, Hayes had known the archaeologist had been successful. It had taken a while for something, anything, to actually happen but eventually Hayes had seen the Jaffa around the room crouch down, doubled over in pain. Some Doctor Lee, who had been in the room, had used the moment of distraction and had crawled over to General Hammond, hastily explaining that he believed someone was using something he had called a symbiont poison. Or symbiote poison? Whatever it was called had attacked the Jaffa only, leaving all injured officers, who were slowly withering away from the various injuries they had sustained in their try to help Doctor Jackson get to the Stargate, unharmed. However, it had attacked SG-1's Jaffa as well and with the help of Doctor Fraiser, the man called Teal'c had decided to get in some state of trance to avoid the poison circling through his body and astonishingly, it had worked and so Teal'c had been the only Jaffa that had come out unharmed.

After they had been freed by two black clad officers who had only barely been visible in the awful green emergency lighting and those officers had gotten rid of the Goa'uld in a spectacular way and they had gotten the following chaos under some semblance of control, Hayes had only then begun to understand what had really happened. O'Neill and Carter had stealthily made their way through the base and killed all Jaffa all over the base with the poison. But, most certainly because of their friend, they hadn't used that much poison on Level 28. They had calculated the exact amount of poison it would take to just incapacitate all Jaffa and then had shot them all down, even leaving a few of them alive so that the SGC could question them after their awakening (not that it had really brought them any information). Apparently, even that calculation was an almost impossible masterpiece, going by the excited gush of an explanation Doctor Lee had given him and George on that. And then, O'Neill and Carter had just topped it by singlehandedly overthrowing the two Goa'uld who had taken control over the base. Hayes had to admit that when he had watched the surveillance tapes afterwards, he couldn't _believe_ it. Neither the abilities and powers those two officers wielded, nor how far they had been willing to go to defend a base and a race they must have believed had abandoned them. It was a testament to the dedication of both officers and Hayes couldn't help but be impressed.

When Cheyenne Mountain had reported back to the surface, the army had just been about to prepare an A-bomb and Hayes had been made acutely aware that anyone within this base who had survived, owed their lives to Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter. When the impending danger of their own men had been thwarted, the Special Forces under the leadership of a Brigadier General Carl Lincoln had taken over. Seeing that almost nobody within the SGC, aside from Hayes himself, had been able to stand on their own two feet anymore, the President had let them. He had waited for Doctor Fraiser and her army of doctors and nurses to treat all injured before he had reinstated General Hammond as the Officer in Charge and together, they had made an assessment on how the situation had turned out. He, the President, had survived, and while Henry himself didn't see that as much of an accomplishment seeing how things had turned out for uncountable others, it apparently was something the military base took quite a bit pride in and consolation from. But all in all, Cheyenne Mountain had lost something about sixty SF's, three civilian scientists and two complete SG teams, who had decided to fight back. Luckily, however, the Levels that had been locked down had remained untouched, so almost all scientists and medical personnel had remained unharmed, and most of the injured officers Hayes had gotten to know in the briefing room were stubbornly fighting their injuries, making Doctor Fraiser rather optimistic that they wouldn't lose any more.

Lincoln's men had had to temporarily take over all positions the former SF's had occupied, so the SGC wasn't left completely defenseless, even though the Brigadier General himself had left the moment Hammond had been back in charge. The Secret Service had all but stormed the base the moment the Special Forces had gotten in and had demanded that Hayes returned to safe-and-proper Washington, but being the President gave your 'no' quite a bit of strength. Hayes had all but refused to leave until he hadn't seen for himself how the situation played out. And, admittedly, he had been curious. Curious to get to know the two officers that had rescued not only his life but the whole planet.

So Hayes had been quite disappointed when Doctor Fraiser had reported that Colonel O'Neill had died on the way to the infirmary and his 2IC, Major Carter, wouldn't be far behind if they didn't get _unconventional_ soon. General Hammond had then made a deal with the female Goa'uld. Hayes had watched attentively but had stayed completely out of it to not give his importance to the human race away. The Goa'uld had healed Major Carter as best as possible in exchange for her freedom and that of her male partner. They hadn't spared a single thought to those Jaffa that were still in the SGC's captivity and the moment they had been released, they hadn't looked back but simply used the chance and fled.

From then on, Hayes had paid special attention to Major Carter's recovery Fraiser updated them on regularly. Her body had taken quite a toll in the happenings but reading between the lines, Hayes suspected the Doctor was more worried on the Major's emotional state, seeing what she apparently had been through those last months and given the fact that half her team had died in the attack. Hayes had felt with the unknown Major but while he had requested to get to meet her several times, until now he had been denied just as much as her last teammate was. Doctor Fraiser had had allowed no one near her as long as she had still been wary of the fellow officer's exact state.

And then the completely unexpected had happened: the supposedly dead Colonel O'Neill had walked out of the mortuary alive, causing a sound and steady, very experienced SF to faint. Hayes would have thought it impossible if not for O'Neill's recent explanations, but he wasn't about to look a gift horse into its mouth. He would take what he could get.

And again, Hayes thought, now that he had gotten to know O'Neill, his first instinct on the soldier had been right. He had suspected that the man was a liable, trustworthy and dutiful officer, going by what he had risked, but O'Neill had by far surpassed what Hayes had imagined. The Colonel had turned out a fine observer with an acute gut feeling and wide-awake instincts he was trusting in. To be honest, Hayes had to admit that he had taken an immediate liking to the blunt man and he would have done quite a bit so that the Colonel could resume his former position, because in Hayes' opinion that was exactly where someone like Colonel O'Neill, with his powers to boot, belonged: the first lines of defense.

But no matter how much Hayes would wish for the situation to be different, he failed to see a loophole that would allow him to get the Colonel out of the tight spot he had maneuvered himself into.

"We're here," General Hammond suddenly announced into Hayes' thoughts.

The President nodded and concentrated back on the people walking with him. Now he was really curious to get to know Major Carter, because from the looks of it she seemed to be important to Colonel O'Neill and Hayes didn't believe the Colonel to give that much trust freely. Carter really had to be something for him to work that well together with her and she certainly had done her fair share in the rescue mission to leave no doubt about her abilities. And if she was anything like the Colonel, surpassing Hayes' expectations, he would gladly include her in his attempts to get them their former positions back. He, as well as his country, needed good, loyal people and officers, and Hayes was prepared to put his foot down on their behalf if need be. Because going by the potential he saw in O'Neill – and his 2IC if she was even remotely like that – they would make outstanding leaders within the Air Force someday. And Hayes considered it part of his job to recognize such potential in people and get them to where they were needed, because instead of Hayes himself, these people would remain on their posts even after the next election.

The isolation room's door swooshed open and Hayes stepped in. There was a hospital bed placed in the middle of the isolation room a woman was sitting on. She looked up surprised at their sudden appearance and Hayes studied her carefully. She looked to be about at least fifteen years younger than Colonel O'Neill and certainly younger than Hayes had expected her to be. The high way the Colonel, General Hammond and quite a lot of people throughout the SGC thought of her had made Hayes somehow expect someone older, more experienced.

She made attempts to stand up when the General entered, but he waved her off. "At ease, Major," he ordered and shooting him a thankful smile that turned out quite empty thanks to the exhausted look she was wearing, the woman sat back on her bed.

Trailing after George, Hayes observed the woman. She was outstandingly beautiful, he had to admit, even though she looked beaten. Slim, trained figure, shoulder-length, blond hair and light blue eyes. From her military folder Hayes knew she was a PhD in theoretical astrophysics too, so she had to be smart as well. And you didn't get promoted to Major this young if you weren't good.

Hayes watched when Agent Barrett stepped up to her, coming to stand by the side of her bed, and greeted her politely. The Major answered, the all-polite smile still firmly in place, but somehow Hayes had the impression she was keeping her distance from the other man. When Barrett got closer and inquired about the arms she had wrapped up in bandages, Hayes noticed her moving slightly out of his range. She did it almost inconspicuously, covered by another movement so the NID agent didn't suspect a thing, but being an outside observer, Hayes noticed. Hayes almost smirked. Barrett was her age and considered good-looking but apparently the Major didn't fall for that. Strange, because Hayes didn't remember reading anything about her being married. Then again, this didn't mean she wasn't in a relationship.

Deciding to come to her help (or Barrett's, before the man would embarrass himself), Hayes stepped up to her. Initially, he had decided to go with the same tactic he had used with Colonel O'Neill but in the last second, Hayes changed his mind.

"Major Carter?" he asked while extending his hand out to her. "Henry Hayes, current President of the United States."

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise so fast Hayes couldn't help the tiny chuckle he did. Nevertheless, she grabbed his hand and shook it firmly, before moving to stand at attention for him, too.

"Please," Hayes stopped her in time by motioning for her to halt. He'd rather she stayed seated, given her injury. From Doctor Fraiser's report he knew her arms weren't hurt seriously, thanks to the Colonel's and the Goa'uld's healing, but they were burned from the high amount of electricity she had withstood and so he figured moving had to hurt.

Again, she sat down, before observing him curiously. Hayes couldn't help but study her as well. Her expression wasn't as closed off as that of Colonel O'Neill and she seemed much more approachable. Still, Hayes felt that he shouldn't make the mistake to underestimate her just because she seemed more amicable than the intimidating Colonel O'Neill.

"What can I do for you, Mr. President?" she asked professionally.

"How are you, Miss Carter?" he countered with a question of his own, trying to be polite. He wasn't really sure how he should address her. All military personnel was referring to her as 'Major', all civilian personnel and the scientists called her 'Doctor' and Henry was at a loss in which category he fit in.

"Major," she corrected immediately.

"Major Carter," he acknowledged.

"I am fine, thank you," she answered politely.

Henry thought of mentioning her injured arms but gave up before trying. He had met enough military personnel to know their stubbornness about injuries. You never appeared weak, much less in front of a superior officer. Seemingly, Carter was military through and through.

Hayes stepped up to her bed and deciding to stick to the politeness he asked: "Would you mind telling us what happened to you the past months?"

Instantly, her eyes narrowed and she studied him with a gaze that made Hayes feel like an insect under a microscope. Now she was wary and tried to assess what he was getting at. Still, all professional, she began to narrate her experiences. At first, Hayes was disappointed, believing her to be another one of these people that obeyed him just because he was the President. Maybe he shouldn't have told her after all…

But then something stood out to Hayes. She was telling much the same things Colonel O'Neill had done. She was more thorough but unfailingly, as if they had a mutual agreement, she recounted the same they had just heard from Colonel O'Neill. Still, Henry had been present in the control room when the SF's had overpowered the two officers and knew they had had no time to get their stories straight. In fact, Henry had no idea if the Major was even aware whether or not her CO had actually survived. So seeing that they still spoke of the same things meant that Colonel O'Neill had told the truth. And they were both _forgetting_ to tell about the same parts.

Hayes was curious what they were hiding. He tried needling it out of Major Carter but she seemed to catch on just as fast as the Colonel had and she was certainly better at avoiding his questions. She unfailingly answered any question he had, even those the Colonel had stayed quiet to, but without actually telling him anything.

Hayes was getting frustrated. By the looks of it, she was very much aware of the dance they were doing and she was quite adept with words, so Hayes was sure that he wouldn't get anything out of her she wasn't willing to spill. Man, he thought inwardly, she'd make a fantastic diplomat. She had a calm, professional attitude but still was no pushover. Coupled with her physical strength as an officer and her wits and intelligence, Hayes could understand how she'd gotten the Colonel to like her. Maybe, Hayes contemplated, it was even more like that. Both the Colonel and Major Carter had carefully avoided any questions that aimed at the relationship between them. They hadn't even told a single thing about how it had been between them on that mysterious planet they weren't giving away. But seeing that they had spent half a year together with absolutely no other company, there had to have happened at least something. Then again, maybe this something between them would get them in even more trouble, seeing that they were CO and 2IC…

Abruptly, Hayes stood up. Thanking the Major adequately, he made to leave almost instantly. He needed to speak with General Hammond. Somehow, Hayes had the impression he was still left out of a few important things he needed to know to assess the situation. And only when he was thoroughly informed he could try to work on untangling the complicated situation he found himself in after what had begun as just a routine visit. Only then would he stand a chance to help Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, and that was something he really wanted to do.


	55. Clearing up

_**Author's notes**_ _: As usual, thank you all for following, reading and reviewing!_

 _And now, Part 1 of what you all have been waiting and asking for._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Five – Clearing up_

Jack stepped into the briefing room, escorted by two heavily armed SF's. The SF's took position at the nearby walls, joining at least half a dozen other guards. Jack ignored them, knowing this was more SOP than because of any danger they were expecting from him. It was more to reassure those stuck-up Pentagon lackeys than to hold him back from an attack should he be planning something like that. Which he was not. Despite the fact that another three days had passed in which he had been all but ignored, Jack was determined to play it out nice. He still hadn't been allowed to see Carter, but for her sake Jack was ready to wait patiently and play by the rules. For once he was in a situation, where pressure, impatience and his stubborn streak wouldn't get him anywhere and so Jack was prepared to do it the demanded way: by waiting for his turn.

Which _finally_ had come, he thought, when he walked forwards unhurriedly, studying the people sitting at the table. Of course, there were General Hammond, Senator Kinsey and Agent Barrett, as well as the stranger Jack had talked to during his interrogation, and then there was Colonel Simmons as another representative of the NID and General Francis Maynard as representative of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. Behind General Maynard stood Major Davis, who nodded at Jack with a relieved expression on his face. Jack gave a sloppy salute to greet the people he really valued like General Hammond, General Maynard and Major Davis, but that was pretty much all he did to pay his respects to the small assembly that had gathered for his trial.

Jack looked on and noticed there also were a Captain from the NID and a Lieutenant from the Pentagon, who, from the looks of it, had been brought along as witnesses and recorders, and Sergeant Harriman stood behind General Hammond, in case he was needed. Jack was somehow relieved to see the faithful Sergeant up and walking, even if he still seemed rather white in the face and so he shot the other man a small smile the Chief Master Sergeant returned wholeheartedly.

And, Jack noticed much to his pleasure, there was Teal'c. The Jaffa stood in front of the window overlooking the Stargate, silently waiting for Jack to acknowledge him. For a moment, Jack was aware of the situation and all personnel present, but then he decided they could as well all go screw themselves and stepped forwards to greet his brother-in-arms.

"T!" he greeted happily while he reached out to clap hands – or rather forearms – with the Jaffa.

"O'Neill," the Jaffa answered with a completely calm, collected expression Jack could accurately read nonetheless. "It is most satisfying to see you unharmed."

"Same here, buddy, same here!" Jack said wholeheartedly. He was really relieved the symbiote poison hadn't harmed his friend in any way.

"So you stayin' around for the party?" Jack asked while motioning around the packed room, where he was sure he would pretty soon receive his sentence.

The Jaffa's mouth curled as if he was confused by Jack's choice of words, but then he inclined his head, simply stating: "Indeed."

"Sweet," Jack said casually, but in all honesty he was relieved he didn't have to sit through this farce all alone. He would have wished for Daniel to be there, too, because Jack was sure that he would soon be in dire need of the other man's diplomatic skills, but yeah, no luck there, so Jack would take what he could get.

Footsteps sounded out from the stairs leading up to the briefing room and with one hand on the backrest of the chair he would be expected to sit in, Jack turned. He knew at the sight of the first sliver of gold who they were bringing in and his heart began to race automatically.

Jack's mouth turned completely dry and he had to claw onto his whole self-control to not let anything slip on his face when Carter slowly made her way up the stairs, flanked front and back by SF's. Jack drank in her sight he had been deprived of. Her golden hair by now flowed down her shoulders and now that she had access to shampoo again, it was back to its old shine. She was dressed in the SGC's BDUs, which made her such a familiar sight Jack almost sighed content. She was walking calmly and the way she usually walked, telling him she had recovered from her injuries, except for her arms that were still wrapped in bandages to protect the healing skin. Her face however held a dead expression. It was slack, barely the professional expression she tried to conjure up for the impending investigation she probably believed to have to face, and her normally sparkling blue eyes were dull and vacant. She was walking around like a zombie, barely connected to the reality around her.

Jack immediately worried and it was all he could do that he wasn't jumping forwards and shoved the SF at the front aside to question her what had happened. Attentively, he tracked her making her way forwards, but he didn't move an inch, standing rooted to the ground, his hand clawing into the chair's backrest with the strength it took him to fight the feelings that were threatening to overtake and show. Feelings he really couldn't give away with half the Washington brass looking. He didn't need to give them any more reasons to court-martial them.

Finally, the SF's stepped aside, joining their comrades along the walls and she looked up, visibly steeling herself for what was to come, when her eyes fell on Jack. Jack saw her freeze, her whole body grounding to a halt at his sight. She blinked rapidly, her mouth opening but the words failing to come out. She looked at him as if she'd seen a ghost.

Jack smiled. "Hey there, Carter," he said, careful that his voice was giving nothing away but friendly politeness.

"Sir…!" she whispered baffled, before continuing in a disbelieving voice: "You're alive!"

Jack raised an eyebrow. Well, yes, he was.

But then it dawned on him. Someone must have told her he had died. And obviously that someone had failed to inform her he had come back from the dead. Sort of.

"Alive and kicking, Carter," he confirmed.

She seemed overtaxed with the whole situation. Obviously that hadn't been what she had been expecting and suddenly Jack knew why she had looked so exhausted. She had been trying to come to terms with the fact that Jack had died. Right after Daniel. She had tried to go on, trying to see sense in life again after two of the people closest to her had died, leaving her back all alone to face an unknown future.

"Well, even if that is rather _touching_ …" Kinsey cut in with a voice that suggested he was rather talking about a nest of spiders he'd found under his bed than the reunion of two close friends and fellow coworkers. "… we're here for an important reason and we don't have all the time in the world. Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter, please sit down."

As if on autopilot, Carter walked over to stand next to him, shooting a small smile towards Teal'c when she passed him and when she stopped in front of the table, she gave a textbook-perfect salute for all the higher-ups present. Jack waited for her to stand by his side, before he turned for the men behind him, completely ignoring Kinsey until this point. Together, they sat down in the chairs opposite of all the higher-ups and Teal'c took position behind them, standing with his hands clasped behind his back like a guard.

When Jack leaned back in his chair, studying the men across from them, he noticed Carter trembled slightly. She kept it together remarkably well, but from the way she clamped her tight fists against her thighs, he knew she was fighting the light tremors that shook her body from the shock she'd gotten from seeing him. Carefully, Jack reached out for her under the table and laid one of his large hands over one of her smaller ones, squeezing lightly, cautious of her injuries. Jack knew from the points of view that no one could have noticed but Teal'c and he trusted their friend to completely overlook the gesture. Carter exhaled and relaxed upon feeling his touch. She didn't acknowledge it outwardly, but she turned over one of her hands to intertwine their fingers. And together, they sat, awaiting their sentence.

"Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter," General Maynard began despite the fact that Jack could see Kinsey was practically dancing on the edge of his seat in impatience. "You are aware why we're all here, aren't you?"

Jack and Sam nodded, but still the General continued: "You both have committed serious crimes against the Air Force and the United States. You both ignored standing orders and deserted, going AWOL for about six months. You both exposed Earth and its allies to an unimaginable risk by performing serious breaches of security. You attacked fellow officers on the run. You seriously compromised the way this highly classified base works and put it out of order for days. Your reckless actions endangered the whole planet, its security and its freedom, and shows remarkable lack of foresight, sense of responsibility and duty, sympathy and awareness of the consequences. Do you understand that?"

Jack and Sam exchanged a quick glance and Jack smiled reassuringly at her when he saw her tense face. Nevertheless, it was her, who answered: "We do, General."

"And we were fully aware of all consequences when we fled," Jack added.

The General looked up astonished. "So you knew what you could possibly offer to any enemy of the United States, the Air Force and the whole planet Earth, should you be captured off-world?" he asked perplexed.

"That, as well as what would expect us the moment we would return," Jack clarified kindly. "We're not stupid."

Despite his words, the General shook his head as if Jack's admission had made it even worse than they admitting they hadn't thought that far could have made it.

"Still, you both came back," the stranger, who sat next to General Hammond, said quietly.

"'Course!" Jack agreed. "Despite our actions, we both know where our duties and our loyalties lie! We wouldn't even have deserted in the first place if the situation hadn't been so dire for us!"

"And we took every measure possible to ensure we would not be found off-world as to not compromise Earth and the SGC," Sam next to him agreed.

"Oh? And how would you have achieved that?" Kinsey asked sarcastically.

Jack levelled angry eyes on the man who proved to be more annoying than a thorn in the foot. "We chose to hide on an uninhabited planet with adequate defense mechanisms with which we could defend ourselves against possible threats."

Goa'uld as well as irritating NID agents and fellow sympathizers, Jack thought mockingly.

"You are only two individuals," Kinsey countered. "The Goa'uld have armies. How would you have defended against them?"

"The planet we hid on is called Laterra," Sam explained calmly. "It has a large, functioning military base left behind by the Ancients. No Goa'uld army could have infiltrated it."

Jack could see a glint appear in Kinsey's and Colonel Simmons' eyes, but the Colonel looked completely professional when he waved her statement away with a hand. "Major Carter," he said reprovingly. "The Goa'uld have shown that they just use the Ancients' technology, just as they've done with the Stargates. What makes you think they couldn't just take this base over as well?"

"Because you need the Ancient gene to get it running," Sam continued calmly. "Without the ATA gene, you can't even open a door over there. So the Goa'uld would have next to no possibility to get access to the base."

Jack smirked at seeing how she faced off with the asshole Simmons. No one, aside from Daniel maybe, could outtalk Carter!

"If you say 'next to no possibility' you mean there _are_ possibilities?" Kinsey inquired with a smirk, obviously thinking he had gotten Carter.

Sam raised a brow. "I've said it just to be thorough. I suppose the Goa'uld could enter if they had control over a host with the ATA gene and there were no defensive mechanism that would specifically single out Goa'uld, but as far as we know, the only humans still in possession of the ATA genes are here on Earth and seeing that the SGC's personnel are the only ones going off-world and the only one of them possessing the ATA gene is Colonel O'Neill, we knew no Goa'uld had control over such a host. And there is still the possibility the Ancients had their base secured against such measures of attempted entry. Seeing how advanced their defensive mechanism were, I highly suspect there to be such a mechanism, but since the Goa'uld didn't find us off-world, we couldn't really prove that theory."

Jack's smirk grew even wider when he noticed neither Simmons nor Kinsey could make something out of that little, tiny possibility. Hell, if Carter said 'next to no possibility', then that was exactly what she meant. So essentially, Jack and Sam had guarded themselves as best as possible while off-world.

"You were lucky there was such a planet," Kinsey growled. "If there hadn't been, you would have seriously endangered Earth!"

"Who says we would have gone off-world if there hadn't been such a planet?" Jack countered, smiling sweetly. He knew they would have given the situation, even if they would have had to sleep on the ground of some tiny excuse of a planet but hell, as if he would admit that to Kinsey!

General Maynard cut in. "I believe you that you tried to guard yourself and the secrets you're in possession of while off-world," he admitted. "But fact is, none of you were supposed to be off-world in the first place! Major Carter had been under arrest and I believe SG-1, including you, Colonel O'Neill, was ordered to stay at the SGC for the duration of the investigation."

Neither Jack nor Sam answered to that, so General Hammond felt compelled to confirm it with a nod when Maynard looked around questioningly.

"So is it true you disobeyed direct orders?" General Maynard asked, his eyes boring into Jack's.

Jack's jaw worked while he mulled over several things he could say in his head, but then decided the truth would work out best. "Yes sir," he said. "But we had good reasons."

"Your reasons–!" Kinsey began, but again the stranger cut in, asking: "What were the reasons?"

As if they had agreed on it beforehand, Sam took over, explaining their situation: "Colonel O'Neill and I are in possession of special powers since our abduction on P3T-643. Ever since these powers have gotten public knowledge, we were facing the threat of being made into guinea pigs and neither of us could accept that given our current experiences with being held hostage and having to undergo experiments."

"However, it wasn't your turn to decide that," Simmons admonished. "You are officers of the Air Force and the Air Force decides where your talents are of most use. So if the Air Force would decide to reassign you to a research area to study your powers that could very well be the next step in humanity's development, then you follow the orders given to you."

Aha, Jack thought. It was the open confirmation of what he and General Hammond had suspected from the beginning: the 'Air Force' or rather people like Simmons and Kinsey had indeed taken an interest in their powers, and just as Jack had feared, they had tried to get their hands on them, hiding behind the excuse of the general good of humanity and shoving official Air Force orders up front to mask their own meddling in the background. So far that only strengthened Jack's opinion that he and Carter had just escaped in time. Even if, basically, they were now in the situation they had tried to avoid all the time…

"Well, sir, we know our powers best and so we knew that they need to be handled carefully," Sam countered professionally. "We couldn't risk giving the wrong people access to such strong powers, but since we were given no say in the matter, we decided on this course of action."

"Again, this wasn't your decision to make," Simmons reproached.

"Who else's was it?" Sam inquired politely. "No one but us can handle these powers and no one but us can assess their destructiveness. Do you have any idea what could have happened while trying to experiment on such unknown factors? So in the interest of the general good we decided to rather remove the threat we were posing to our country and our planet."

Jack wanted to whoop out loud for her. Carter really had that thing with the words down!

"I feel like I'm repeating myself, Major Carter," Simmons growled. "Neither of you were in a position to make that decision!"

"And seeing how your powers took the SGC back from the Goa'uld they would have better remained here in the first place. That would have saved dozens of lives," Kinsey said self-assured.

Oh no, you bastard, you don't, Jack almost screamed inwardly. There was no way he would allow Kinsey to push that blame on them!

"That's bullshit!" Jack said straight-forward. "Carter and I trained hard off-world to regain the amount of control we now have. We would have never gotten that control if we'd have stayed!"

"And if we would have stayed, we wouldn't have been at the SGC at the time of the attack," Sam reasoned. "We would have been reassigned to a research facility. We would have had no way to interfere at all."

"It would have cost even more lives," Jack said, throwing Kinsey's own words at the man.

"Oh? Then how come the Goa'uld even knew how to attack Earth? How did they know how to circumvent the unfaultable iris?" Kinsey asked pointedly.

Jack gnawed on his lower lip in concentration. He knew what Kinsey was hinting at, but there was no way he was allowing the slimy bastard to get to Carter!

When neither officer answered immediately, Kinsey prodded: "Major Carter?"

She held her head high and looked the higher-ups straight into the eyes when she answered: "Nirrti got the knowledge through me. She saw a way around the iris when she possessed my body. A way I myself wasn't even aware of at that time."

"And why was Nirrti after you of all people?" Kinsey asked, before answering his own question: "Because of your powers. If it hadn't been for your powers, you wouldn't have interested her at all! She wouldn't have possessed you and found out about the iris' weak spot. Which just proves that you would have better stayed on-world."

"Nirrti might have gone for Carter because of her powers," Jack admitted what was an open secret anyways. "But even without her powers she would have been a good target for a Goa'uld. She has the most knowledge about all things belonging to the Stargate Program. She would have been the perfect host all along."

"Oh? Then maybe Major Carter shouldn't go off-world at all anymore," Simmons suggested smugly. "I think nobody would want that sensitive knowledge in the wrong hands."

Jack bit down on his tongue. That wasn't what he had been trying to say!

"You're going overboard, Colonel!" General Hammond cut in angrily. "Major Carter is a valuable member of the SGC and it is my decision whether or not she will continue to go off-world! Many things that now go without saying in this program are thanks to Major Carter's off-world research!"

Simmons didn't answer to that. He just shot General Maynard a glance, speculating whether or not his 'suggestions' had taken root where he had wanted them to.

"Well, actually the fact that Major Carter and Colonel O'Neill _weren't_ present during the Goa'uld's attack made them able to free the SGC," Agent Barrett said unexpectedly. "If they had been there, they would have gotten captured alongside all others, wouldn't they?"

Jack was astonished. Not only by the fact that the rather quiet NID agent was coming to their defense, but also that he had made such an accurate observation. Yes, if he and Carter had been there during the first wave of the attacks, all it would have needed to make them surrender would have been to threaten the life of one of the various hostages. And they had had enough encounters with Nirrti so that the Goa'uld scientist would have known that.

"And they did free the base quite spectacularly," the stranger inserted quietly.

Colonel Simmons grunted while going through a few documents in front of him. "Indeed! By – let me see – damaging highly important equipment attached to the Stargate, causing a base-wide blackout, wasting the invaluable little amount of symbiote poison we got from the Tok'ra and threatening to damage the Stargate beyond any repair with their reckless actions!"

Jack wanted to throw something at the other man. Really, he usually wasn't one to hate people, simply because he found it paid the person more attention than they were worth, but Simmons and Kinsey were _really_ testing Jack's patience.

"The fact is they got done what the whole SGC failed to do: they defeated Nirrti and Ares," General Hammond said furious. "Given that the army was about to throw a nuclear bomb that would have erased the threat along with all people present at the SGC at that time and the Stargate itself, I'd say it was a small price to pay! Sergeant Siler is already repairing the damage on the wiring, the Stargate isn't damaged, the base's energy is back on track and we can always ask the Tok'ra for another sample of the symbiote poison. I consider it a success we still _have_ a Stargate Program after what has happened!"

Again, Jack felt strangely warmed at seeing what an effort General Hammond made to defend them. He really was an outstanding CO.

And, also something worth noticing, Jack observed how the good Senator Kinsey turned slightly green at the reference to the A-bomb that had literally been hanging over the SGC's head for a while, while he'd been there. Served him right, Jack thought. This was the reality they had to deal with every day while those Washington-wackos were calculating what the damaged wiring would cost them, no matter how many lives they had saved with the measures they had taken. Really, Jack and Sam had had no means of knowing what they would be stumbling in, so they had mostly improvised, making the best out of what they had. And Jack still thought they had done a remarkably good job.

"Well, leaving the details aside for a while, I think it can be said that both, Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter, have acted against standing orders and deserted," General Maynard summed it up. "However, despite knowing what personal risk they would take, they came back and freed the SGC when the base was in need, which speaks of their loyalty and their respect of their jobs."

Simmons snorted. "Excuse me, sir, but we can't really justify their behavior with that, can we? Yes, they have come to the SGC's help, but that doesn't make the fact undone that they have been AWOL for six months! They disobeyed direct orders! What signal would we send if we would let them off that easily?"

"None," Maynard deadpanned suddenly. "The Stargate Program is highly classified, so nothing of this discussion will ever be heard off outside of this room."

"Still, what they have done needs to be court-martialed!" Kinsey insisted.

Maynard shook his head. "And what would you say in the court-martial? None of the judges would have the clearance to know even the _name_ of the program! None of what has happened can appear in a court-martial and be known by the public!"

And for the first time, Jack felt slightly optimistic. General Maynard was right! Jack knew the man was a fierce approver of the Stargate Program and once, he had even congratulated Jack on the successes SG-1 had accomplished. Jack knew the man wouldn't leave them hanging if he could help it, but he was only one man. He couldn't act against the wishes of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, but apparently, the JCS didn't wish for anything to get out, so maybe he and Carter would get lucky. Just as you couldn't be held responsible for crimes on a mission that had officially never happened – something Jack knew from firsthand experience from his black ops days – you couldn't really get court-martialed for leaving a post that didn't even exist as far as the US government was concerned.

Okay, Jack was aware that it was a pretty flimsy excuse. If they had just caught him and Carter off-world and had brought them back to Earth in custody, they _would_ have been court-martialed under some pretense. Or forced into retirement, most likely with a dishonorable discharge. It was largely thanks to the role they had played in the fight against Nirrti and Ares that was sparing them the discharge or the stay in a military prison. If Jack had to guess, then his and Carter's little stunt had shown the Washington brass what advantages their powers had on the frontlines and they were considered too valuable to be released from duty. There was nothing quite like their powers and Jack wasn't surprised the JCS were grasping for any possibility to get them where they once had been: under orders of the US Air Force, to protect their country and planet from any threat, just as they had done with Nirrti.

General Maynard straightened and shot a quick glance at the stranger. "As far as the Joint Chiefs of Staff are concerned, we'd like to establish that Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter have been on a long-term, classified mission to research that base they've found. They have acted according to General Hammond's orders at the time and have been in contact with the SGC during that time."

Oh, so that was how they were going to play it out, Jack thought. They were going to ignore any serious breach of security Jack and Sam had conducted and pretend it had all been done on a mission. Nice safe of face, Jack thought, but who was he to complain?

The stranger and General Hammond nodded, indicating they consented and Jack had to refrain from bouncing excitedly on his seat. He knew what it would mean for them. Everything would essentially go back to the way it had all been before. As if they had really been on a mission, Jack would take over position as 2IC of the SGC and leader of SG-1 once again and Carter would go back to being his 2IC and the lead scientist. They would continue right where they had left off before they had fled and it was more than Jack had dared to dream of. He and Carter would get their lives and their jobs back without having to fear any consequences. It was… somehow weird. Jack didn't even know what to think of it yet.

Jack and Sam simultaneously exhaled relieved, both unaware of how tense they had actually been. They had really gotten off with a slap on the wrist!

General Maynard looked at them sharply. "I hope you do get this right!" he warned. "This is more to save the Stargate Program than your asses! Another stunt like this and you're both spending the rest of your lives in retirement! At best!"

Jack and Sam nodded simultaneously. Neither needed to be told, because they were very much aware how lucky they had gotten, but nonetheless, they accepted the warning wordlessly.

Under the table, Sam squeezed Jack's hand and in response, he began running his thumb over the back of her hand. Slowly, they began to feel tentatively optimistic.

"You can't do that!" Kinsey protested immediately.

"I believe it is done," General Maynard countered calmly. "The orders are already filed. The mission Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter have been on has been approved by General Hammond as well as the JCS. You can look it up."

Then the General turned back to the two officers sitting across from him. "As with every normal mission, you will both submit full mission reports."

"Yes sir," they confirmed, both smiling slightly.

"But, General!" Colonel Simmons protested. "After all what happened, after all they've done, you can't just go on as if nothing has happened!"

"In fact, nothing _has_ happened," the General explained quietly. "Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter have never deserted to begin with. They were acting on orders of General Hammond at all times. Everything they've done was part of a long-term mission they had to interrupt because of the attack on the SGC. And I'm sure the recon mission will be continued sometime in the future."

Jack recognized the hidden meaning immediately. The Air Force was interested in the Ancient military base they had found, but Jack wasn't surprised because after all, it was the SGC's mission to find alien technology to defend Earth against the Goa'uld with and what would be better than Ancient military technology? So they would probably go back to Laterra someday to retrieve what could turn out valuable to Earth. But somehow, Jack didn't mind. He didn't like the thought of raiding the base he had called home for a short time, but he was willing enough to trade that against his and Carter's freedom and the possibility to return to their former jobs and lives.

Kinsey snorted to General Maynard's words, a move Jack thought brave seeing that the man certainly hadn't gotten four stars for nothing. "And how do you think you will pull this off to make it believable? They didn't even say on which planet they'd been! Or do you intend to just pick a random one?"

"Oh, we do have the address," General Hammond contradicted. "Doctor Jackson directly dialed the planet and our dialing computer records all dialing sequences, so we know what specific planet we're talking about."

Kinsey's and Simmon's heads snapped around. "Why does the NID not know about this?" they inquired simultaneously.

"Oh, the NID knows," Barrett said kindly. "I have known and as demanded, I've written the information down in my report. Unfortunately, my report isn't finished and I didn't have the time yet to inform you."

Jack almost laughed out loud. Kinsey and Simmons were looking about to burst from rage.

"I demand a SG team goes to check that planet out!" Colonel Simmons snarled. "Who knows what kind of threats could be lurking there?"

"First of all, that's not your decision to be made!" General Hammond snapped. "It's mine. Second, if you expect there to be dangers, you still want to send _my_ men head-on into them? And third, a team has already been sent to the planet."

"The NID should have known of that!" Colonel Simmons raged, before turning for Barrett. "Or did _you_ know again?"

Barrett shook his head. "Of that I have no knowledge."

"Because you didn't need to," General Hammond decided. "This is standard SGC operating procedure. It doesn't concern the NID as long as there's no breach of any rule."

Jack was enjoying the sight of the downright fuming Colonel and the seething Senator. Jack knew exactly what the SGC would have found on Laterra: nothing. Because the moment someone who wasn't Jack himself or Carter would have gone near the base, the defense systems would have activated and would have sent them running back to the Stargate. There was no way they would ever access the base without Jack. But why tell the NID? It was as General Hammond had said. This was nothing the NID had to concern themselves with, even if Simmons and Kinsey probably would have killed to get their hands on the technology that was hidden on Laterra. Too bad Jack had ensured that nobody would get to anything he and Carter weren't approving of.

"So is that it?" Jack asked business-like. "Can we go back to our jobs?"

General Maynard looked at them and for the tiniest moment Jack thought the ghost of a smile cross the other man's face. "Since nothing has happened, yes," he answered.

Jack was about to jump up, do some small talk just to give off the impression of being polite and then sweep off his 2IC for a small, private party, when Kinsey smashed his fists down on the briefing table.

"No!" he protested. "This is not it!"

"Bob…" the stranger said calmly. "Accept it."

"No, I'm not!" the Senator screeched. "Something _has_ happened. There were rules broken! And I don't stand for such officers to just stroll around unpunished, thinking they stand above the rules!"

Jack felt somehow insulted by these words, but this time, he stayed out of it, deciding he didn't want to ruin the impression of a good soldier these people had of him. And wisely, Carter also didn't say a thing, merely letting the others handle the raging Senator.

"I think we just discussed this," General Maynard said matter-of-factly.

Suddenly a grin appeared on Senator Kinsey's face that made Jack's skin crawl with a bad, foreboding feeling. Why was the Senator hell-bent on getting them court-martialed? What did he gain from sending him and Carter to prison? From what Jack had gathered in the previous days Kinsey had been one of the people screaming loudest to get them back to the SGC. Then again, getting them back didn't equal having them back at the SGC. It was more likely to be the man's main interest to have them under close supervision and with next to no possibility to decide over themselves anymore. With their posts at the SGC, Jack and Sam still had lots of freedoms and could decide on their own. Even worse, they were in close contact with the Stargate, giving them the possibility to vanish once again should they deem it necessary, something Kinsey and his unhealthy interest in their powers would desperately want to prevent. So yes, Jack thought, it matched that Kinsey would rather have them court-martialed – Jack had a strong suspicion they wouldn't end up in some prison but rather get _reassigned_ to some research facility – than have them work at the SGC to protect Earth.

So Jack wasn't that surprised anymore when he saw Kinsey inhale deeply to deliver another blow in the hopes of bringing him and Carter down, despite all the support they had gained with their actions.

" _This_ we did not discuss," Kinsey said ominously. Then he turned for Sam. "Major Carter, is it true you were completely alone on that planet you were hiding on?" he asked.

Confused, Sam nodded. "Yes, the planet was deserted, aside from the Colonel and myself."

Kinsey's grin grew even wider. "Did you interact with anyone on your trips to other worlds?" he inquired.

"No," Sam answered honestly. "We kept all contact to the bare minimum. After all, we were trying to go unseen."

"So then the only person you have interacted with those last months is Colonel O'Neill?" Kinsey insisted.

"Yes," Sam confirmed and by now Jack was asking himself what the man was trying to get at with these questions.

Now Kinsey's smile was positively devilish. "Then there have been rules broken!" he stated.

For a moment, Jack frowned, not understanding, but then realization hit him like a bucket of cold water. _Shit_ , he cursed inwardly.

"Senator Kinsey–" General Hammond began, but the Senator was faster.

"According to the SGC's standard operating procedures, Doctor Fraiser has done a thorough examination of Major Carter after her return and the results revealed she has been sexually active in the past time. And there was no one with her but her _Commanding Officer_ , so they acted against the fraternization regulations!"

Out of the corner of his eyes, Jack saw Sam flush darkly, embarrassed beyond words that this topic was discussed in front of half the Washington brass. In this moment Jack really hated Senator Kinsey. He had no right to drag Sam into the mud like that! Yes, they had broken the regs, but did he need to bring it up like that just to get back at them?

Jack leaned back in his chair, sighing unnoticed. Yep, it had been too good to be true, hadn't it? Of course, they didn't just get away with it like that.

Jack knew Kinsey had finally found the dagger to ram in their backs. Because no matter how classified the Stargate Project was, the Air Force could court-martial them all they wanted for breaking these kinds of regulations. They could very well get court-martialed over having had sex without having to mention the Stargate only once. Who cared _where_ he had had that sex with his 2IC? Fact was he had had sex with his 2IC. It didn't matter if it had been off-world, at the SGC or even in proper, boring Washington. It only mattered that it had happened.

Damn it, Jack thought, angry at himself. He should have expected that backhand. He knew the SOP for personnel that returned from long-term, off-world missions and even though they had deserted, he should have known Sam would have to undergo the whole procedure, just as he had had to. It was just that he had written his examination marathon up to the fact that he had returned from the dead and not from half a year of off-world vacation.

And, of course, the Napoleonic power monger _couldn't_ have missed the evidence of their last time together. After all, it had happened just before they had come to the SGC's rescue. There would have been no way of hiding it even if Jack or Sam had thought that far. The chances had just been so slim it had slipped Jack's mind. He had been prepared to fall in the fight with the Goa'uld and if they'd been very lucky he would've thought them to be able to make their way back to Laterra. At the very worst he had expected to be captured and be brought up for charges, but he'd never really considered that they would both be examined first after their long stay off-world. It was SOP, but somehow it had seemed so simple, so unimportant, Jack hadn't paid the thought any attention. Turned out to be a fatal mistake, he grouched inwardly.

Jack was so busy mentally kicking his own ass, he almost missed General Hammond saying: "We did get the report, too, Senator Kinsey."

Yeah, Jack thought bitterly. Of course, they would. Fraiser would have to put the examination's results in Carter's file, making it publicly available to those with enough clearance, and she would have to report her findings to all superior officers in need to know. Grimly, Jack tried to imagine the ruckus _those_ news had probably caused. Poor General Hammond, he thought. The man had done his best to get them out of this misery and he and Carter were giving their all to jump back in headlong.

"Then how come nobody apparently picked up on this blatant breach of protocol?" the Senator asked heatedly, apparently confused that no one had commented on that crime already. Jack had to admit, he was kinda perplexed himself.

Again, General Maynard repeated: "Because there was no breach."

Now Jack was as confused as Kinsey looked. Were they simply going to pretend nothing had happened? But they couldn't really, Jack reasoned. The medical reports were in Carter's file and with the reports on their mission they had to do, it would be blatantly obvious who the one had been she had been 'sexually active' with! Anyone who would want to sabotage the Stargate Program in the future could just use that fact against it!

"How is that no breach of the regulations?" Kinsey raged. Astonishingly, Simmons was not supporting him, even though this had more chances of success than any other of their accusations.

"Because Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter are married, so all _activities_ they have engaged in fall under marital intercourse," General Hammond explained smugly.

Now Jack almost choked on his breath. _What!?_ Married? What the hell…?

For a moment, Jack seriously considered having been thrown into a parallel universe. Or maybe he was actually unconscious and was dreaming this all up? Because this could just not be his reality! Last he'd checked, he had still been divorced. And certainly hadn't remarried.

Jack shot a quick glance at Sam and saw she was equally confused. Jack looked back to the front and opened his mouth to question what the hell was going on – for crying out loud! – when Sam's fingers dug into the hand that was entangled with hers. Jack almost winced out loud but controlled himself in time. He knew however what the message meant: shut up and wait, before you do something to destroy whatever cover General Hammond had come up with. Stroking her hand quickly, Jack told her nonverbally he had understood and would wait to see how it all played out.

"Married?" Kinsey echoed baffled. "That's impossible! They're in the same chain of command! That's even more breach of the regulations!"

General Maynard gathered a document out of a folder and Jack barely managed to not bend over the table and snatch it from Kinsey when Maynard handed it to him. "Colonel O'Neill and Major Carter married some time ago, when Major Carter had been under arrest and not under the command of Colonel O'Neill. The Air Force has checked their request and found it to be within the regulations, so their marriage is officially approved."

By now, Jack felt completely out of it. He had no idea what was going on and while he should probably jump with joy at the fact that the Air Force considered him and Carter married, something he had considered an unattainable dream, it just left him confused and wary. His thoughts were spinning, trying to come up with an explanation, but failing spectacularly. Somehow, it had all turned surreal all of a sudden.

Kinsey threw the document down on the briefing table with such a force it slid over to Jack and inconspicuously, he chanced a quick glance. It was a standard Air Force form to officially approve of a marriage. Being a superior officer for some years, Jack had seen a few already. Also, he could see his and Carter's signature at the bottom of the document and going by the fine lines marked into the paper, he knew they were the real deal. No fakes. But no matter how much Jack wrecked his brain, he couldn't remember ever signing something like that! Okay, so he usually didn't really check what he was signing anyways, but Carter did. And she looked just as taken by surprise as he did.

What made the whole thing even more suspicious was that Jack noticed there wasn't actually a marriage certificate. The document General Maynard had handed them was a form to acknowledge a marriage based on such a certificate – which needed a wedding to have been held beforehand and Jack was certain he _would_ have known would he have had married Carter – but the certificate itself was mysteriously missing. Not that Kinsey picked up on it in his rage.

Jack leaned back when Maynard retrieved the document, carefully stashing it back into his folder, and tried to look as if he had any idea what was going on.

"That's just not possible!" Kinsey still fumed. "I should have been informed! Why wasn't I informed?"

"What's an officers marriage to you?" Major Davis asked, for the first time participating in the conversation.

Kinsey waved him off, not answering. Jack saw a muscle jump in the other man's jaw and could almost see him thinking frantically, trying to come up with anything to still be victorious. A second of tense silence passed, then another. Jack almost didn't dare to breathe, praying to fate that someone would finally put them out of their misery.

At last, it was the stranger who spoke, his voice quietly asking: "So, have all things finally cleared up?"

Kinsey muttered something under his breath, but had nothing to retaliate with anymore. General Hammond and General Maynard nodded pleased and Major Davis smiled, an honest, happy smile that told Jack how glad the other man was for them. Even the entourage from the Pentagon and the NID finally condescended to some polite smiles, but Jack didn't really care about them, so he barely spared them a side-glance. Jack imagined Colonel Simmons to be more than disappointed, but to his credit the man managed a blank look. Still, Jack was careful with the man, fearing a retaliation of some sort, even if not now. Simmons was patient. Kinsey was downright fuming and stomped from the room, undoubtedly to take the first flight back to Washington to lick his wounds after this spectacular defeat. Well, as far as Jack was concerned, he would hold all doors open for the dear Senator. Agent Barrett though seemed sad all of a sudden and going by the longing looks he sent Sam, Jack had a suspicion why.

The moment Kinsey had stormed off, officially ending the meeting, one after the other began to stand up and pack their things. Routinely, Sam and Jack rose when General Hammond and General Maynard stood up, letting go of each other's hands in the process. Textbook-perfect they stood at attention, with Teal'c silently hovering behind them, while the Pentagon and NID lackeys gathered their belongings and went their ways. Major Davis actually came to them and congratulated them, visibly relieved, and Jack shook the other man's hand with earnest appreciation. The last one to go with a congratulatory nod towards Jack and Sam was General Maynard, leaving Jack back with Sam, Teal'c, General Hammond and the unknown stranger, who had mostly held back throughout the whole discussion. Jack still had no idea, who the man was, even if he seemed important, if the way the four-star General Maynard had been tending to him before leaving the room was any indication.

For a moment, complete silence fell in the room after the many people had left and Jack was left staring at General Hammond's amused smile.

"I imagine, you are quite confused?" General Hammond broke the silence first.

Jack and Sam nodded simultaneously.

"Ask away," General Hammond suggested, barely hiding his fun.

For a moment there was silence, until Jack blurted out: "What the _hell_ has just happened, fer cryin' out loud?!"

"I take it you're talking about the fact that you and Major Carter are married?" General Hammond inquired kindly.

Dumbfounded, Jack stared at his CO. Somehow, it made it so much more weird that his Commanding Officer was so casually speaking about his – _forbidden_ – marriage he hadn't even been aware of himself…!

General Hammond laughed at their stunned faces. "Don't worry," he said. "Actually, it was an accident that got you two married. Doctor Jackson reported it to me when he became aware of it. Apparently, he has been doing some paperwork for Major Carter but a document that wasn't meant for her went in the folder. You two signed it with all the rest and Doctor Jackson sent it to the Air Force's Human Resources Department without noticing. The HR section didn't really check it over and so you two were signed up married even though there was no certificate. And since it worked in our favor seeing how things played out, we decided to make use of the mistake."

Jack almost snorted. Really, what was that? What were the chances of such a coincidence to happen? Jack actually remembered signing the papers for Carter that would put him in charge should something happen to her. He even indistinctly remembered Daniel finding a document neither he nor Carter had signed yet, which was probably the one they shouldn't have signed in the first place. Without checking the content, they had put their signatures under it and Daniel had sent it away. And suddenly, Jack also knew why the Air Force's HR department had most likely not checked up on their marriage certificate. Seeing that Carter had updated her whole will and put him in charge everywhere, they would see that as a confirmation, because that was exactly what you would do when you had just married!

Jack rubbed a hand over his temples exhausted. It matched. Funnily enough, it matched perfectly. Because not that long ago, Jack had updated his will, too. He did that on quite a regular basis, because every time he or SG-1 had had a particularly rough mission, he looked over his last will and every time he felt he wasn't leaving enough behind for Carter, because every time he would have grown a bit closer to her. So he always changed a few things here and there. By now Carter was getting most of his things should he ever die before her (something he was praying for), including his much-beloved cabin. He had long debated with himself about that, not knowing if she would even appreciate it given how she avoided his invitations to go fishing all the time, but seeing what an emotional and nostalgic value his cabin had for Jack, he felt it was the best thing he could give to Carter to show her what she meant to him. With the last update he'd done, he had even included his house in Colorado Springs to the stock of things she would get. He knew that Daniel would need it more, seeing that he was living in a stuffed apartment that was practically bursting with rocks – pardon, artifacts – and Carter had a house of her own, but Jack _wanted_ Carter to get the house that held so many memories of times spent together – of team nights, of team barbecues, of parties with the whole gang and of little stolen moments they had shared, all the while knowing they should call Daniel over to act as a chaperone. So he'd put her in for the house and Daniel would get the money he had saved up on, aside from the part he would leave for his family. Daniel was still in charge of all decisions to be made should Jack himself be incapable of it, but with his last will he had given Carter almost everything else. When he would die his family would be in for quite some surprise…

"However, as you must have noticed, the marriage itself isn't valid yet, because it has actually never happened," General Hammond cut into Jack's drifting thoughts. "But the HR department needs a copy of the marriage certificate so it can finally acknowledge your married status."

Jack had suspected as much. But he failed to see how he should make that possible, given that _he had never married Carter to begin with!_

"We have the certificate here," General Hammond continued calmly, completely unaware of Jack's concerns.

Jack looked at the highly official document the General was holding out to them that had 'Marriage License' written in big, bold letters at the top. It was indeed a marriage certificate, all important-looking. It was dated back into the time Sam hadn't been under his command for a few days, but it still lacked their signatures. There was Daniel's signature and General Hammond's, acting as witnesses to the marriage, and even the signature of a county clerk to officially recognize and register the marriage (and Jack wondered how they'd made that possible), the ink already dried and slightly cracked from the time it had already spent on the paper. They had really outdone themselves by taking every precaution possible.

"You just have to sign it so I can send it to Washington and you will officially be recognized as married and be relieved of any and all accusations," General Hammond said, smiling widely. He obviously thought he had done them a great favor. He really had, somehow, but Jack felt so overtaxed with the whole situation he just wanted to scream 'time-out!'.

Shooting an uncertain glance at Sam, who still stood all stiff next to him, Jack noticed she hadn't said a thing since the word 'married' had been uttered the first time. To his complete horror Jack found she looked sick. Her pale complexion was even paler, a frown marred her beautiful face and she was clutching her stomach as if she expected to throw up any second.

"Carter?" he asked warily.

Her head snapped around to his and a panicky expression appeared in her gaze. It was as if someone had pulled the rug out underneath Jack's feet. The ground seemed to be giving in and he fell into a deep, dark abyss. She didn't want it! He instantly knew it, with absolute certainty. She didn't want this marriage.

"Carter?" he whispered again, trying for a friendly voice as if he was afraid of scaring her.

She opened her mouth, trying to form words, but there were none to come. And suddenly, her eyes were swimming with tears. Jack almost panicked. He wanted to ask what was wrong, wanted to pull her into an embrace to soothe her, wanted to right whatever was making her unhappy, but he just stood there, frozen. He was very aware of the presence of General Hammond, Teal'c and the stranger, and ironically, now that he seemingly had the right to go over and comfort her, he felt even more hindered.

Thankfully, General Hammond came once more to his rescue. "Do you want to talk about it privately?" he suggested.

"Yes!" Jack almost shouted relieved. Right now there was nothing he really needed more than to talk with her!

The General handed him the certificate and then motioned towards his office. "Use my office. Unfortunately however, I can't give you that much time. We're dancing on a fine line already and I fear the first thing Kinsey's doing when he's back in Washington will be to check your statuses at the HR department. I held them off for a long time, claiming you had both gone on an undercover mission before you were able to hand the certificate in, but I cannot do that much longer."

"Yes, sir. I understand, sir," Jack said habitually, way more focused on Sam's lack of reaction than his CO's words.

So Jack snatched the document from General Hammond and leaving him, Teal'c and the stranger back, he grabbed Carter gently at the upper arm and maneuvered her into the General's office, one of the few rooms where the surveillance cameras could be deactivated. They needed to have a little chat!

* * *

 _A/N: Damn, this chapter turned out so hard to write. Glad to finally have it out of my way._


	56. Gaining

_**Author's notes**_ _: As usual, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _And on with Part Two…_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Six – Gaining_

Sam was acutely aware of the door to General Hammond's office slam shut behind her, courtesy of her ex-and-now-apparently-again-CO. _Jack_.

Sam felt it more than she actually watched him stomping through the room, closing both doors to the office so they remained undisturbed. When he finally stormed towards the General's desk to switch off the security cameras, he got back into Sam's line of vision. Silently, Sam waited for him to finish and turn back to her. When he did, she was greeted with the same blank, expressionless mask on his face he had worn all the time during the interrogation. Sam was familiar with this expression. He usually wore it when he didn't want anyone to get a glimpse at the emotions he was hiding. It was a mask his military persona had perfected, a mask Sam could imagine him having worn it during his black ops missions. It was all action, all hardass soldier and almost no humanity. Sam usually could guess at the emotions behind this mask but this time she was truly at a loss. She knew _she_ was completely overtaxed with the whole situation and the stress she'd been under these last days coupled with the lack of sleep she'd gone through made her wary and uncertain, but she had no idea what could be going on in his head. What did he think about all the things that had happened?

Sam knew Jack didn't want to marry another time and honestly she couldn't hold that fact against him seeing how his first marriage had turned out. Knowing firsthand what it meant to lose a person you loved after the last days, Sam guessed the simple thought of marrying had to make him uncomfortable and so Sam had been far from ever even talking about marriage with him. And then General Hammond had gone and just changed everything. Logically, Sam could understand why he had done it. It was the only way out Sam could think of and actually, they had only had this opportunity because Daniel had once been careless and had screwed up. Without this mistake? There would have been no possibility of getting around a court-martial even though Sam could see how much the Generals Hammond and Maynard had tried to get the SGC's flagship team reinstated.

The question was, however, whether or not her Commanding Officer could live with the solution they had provided. Sam knew she herself would have no problems with that. Heck, she would dance in joy. The thought alone of being married to Jack was making her stomach flutter with millions of butterflies. Sam would have given a _lot_ for that opportunity. But she would never do something against his will. If he didn't want to be married to her, Sam wouldn't force him. If he didn't want to be married to her, she would clear up the misunderstanding, take the blame so General Hammond could save his face and accept the impending court-martial without a regret.

Sam looked up when she heard him sigh and saw him rake a hand through his hair, tousling the now short strands. On Laterra, he had taken to cut his hair on his own, where she had simply stopped bothering after a while, but this time he'd apparently gotten someone to do it, because it was the first real haircut she'd seen on him in months. He looked so Colonel O'Neill again that Sam was taken aback.

In fact, she was so glad to see him standing there, looking his usual, familiar self, Sam wanted to cry in relief. She had thought him to be dead. Nobody had told her he wasn't. Or maybe Janet had tried, since she had for a long time been the only one that had been allowed to go into Sam's isolation room after her breakdown in the shower, but sometime Sam had begun to tune out the other woman when she had been speaking, because despite her numerous, well-meant offers, Sam hadn't been willing to talk to her friend about her emotional state. She hadn't wanted to talk about it in any way or with anyone. Sam had even thrown a fit when Janet had only mentioned Mackenzie, the base's psychiatrist. So maybe Janet had told her and Sam just hadn't listened, but fact was Jack's sight had been completely unexpected for her.

In hindsight, Sam was proud she hadn't just abandoned the whole trial and had gone jumping her Commanding Officer in front of half the Washington brass with the relief she'd felt. She'd probably never been gladder to see him than she'd been at that moment. Sam still had no idea how it was possible he'd returned to her when he'd seemingly died from the zat shots, but she would take the miracle nevertheless. All that mattered was that he was here with her.

Jack looked at her with his intense dark eyes, standing across from her with as much space in between them as he hadn't used in months, making it remarkably obvious he was keeping his distance from her. Nevertheless Sam was so happy to see him, she just couldn't feel hurt by that.

Again, he sighed and began rocking back and forth on his heels, a sign of his nervousness. "Say something, Carter," he demanded. " _Anything_."

Sam had no idea where to actually begin. There were so many things she wanted to say. So many things that needed to be said…

"It's good to see you, sir," she finally mumbled.

He raised an eyebrow, but whether he did it because he was surprised at her choice of topic or because she had reverted back to calling him 'sir', she didn't know. Then he tilted his head to the side, obviously contemplating whether she had been merely greeting him or had tried to tell him something with her words and Sam felt compelled to explain herself.

"I didn't know you had survived," she clarified with a small voice.

"Oh. Yeah. I hadn't," he replied.

Now it was Sam's turn to raise an eyebrow in astonishment. He sighed and rubbed a hand over his neck, leaning back against the General's desk. "I did die," he said. "Ran out of energy back then. It's actually Daniel's fault I'm back here…"

"Daniel?" Sam inquired confused.

Jack nodded. "Remember the ascended beings? Those energy forms like Oma Desala?"

Sam inclined her head in agreement, immediately catching on. Orlin had explained her a few things about them.

"Apparently all Ancients have ascended to this form of existence. And whenever they feel someone is worthy, they help them ascend after their death," he continued, before he motioned with a hand towards the ceiling. "Daniel was up there with them. He made them ascend me after my death as well."

Sam's eyes widened. "Then you were practically immortal!" she exclaimed surprised.

"Yeah…" Jack growled displeased. "But that comes at quite a high price."

Patiently, Sam waited for him to continue.

"Apparently you can watch but never interfere," he explained. "You see everything that's happening but you're not allowed to do a damn thing about it, for crying out loud!"

Sam almost snickered, knowing by heart how Jack would have taken to those kinds of rules. "I take it you said no?" she asked.

"Hell, yes," he confirmed. "I told Daniel he could shove it–!"

"I understand, sir," Sam interrupted smoothly. "But then what happened?"

Jack crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked down towards the ground. "Daniel interfered. He gave me his energy, which allowed my healing abilities to pull me through."

Sam gasped. "I thought you said it's forbidden to interfere?"

Jack nodded. "Yes, it is. I have no idea what has happened to Daniel afterwards, but he had planned that. He couldn't stand the way things were happening any more than I could."

Sam felt the nowadays ever-present tears prick at the corners of her eyes. Daniel! He had always been such a hero…! Silently, Sam thanked her friend, knowing she would forever be grateful for what he'd done. But at the same time, Sam was sad; concerned for what could have happened to her friend after breaking the rules.

Again, Sam looked at Jack, taking in all the features of him she'd grown accustomed to in the last months. She had thought she had lost him for good this time. "It's so good to see you again…" she whispered once more before she was even aware of what she was saying.

Jack looked up and their gazes locked. "Yeah," he agreed earnestly. "Same here."

For a moment they simply looked at each other before he said with a suspiciously calm, relaxed voice: "Oh and Carter? If you ever do something like that move with the Stargate ever again, you're getting it from me! Are we clear?"

Sam's eyebrows shot up in surprise, but military training ensured she confirmed it with a "Yes, sir."

He relaxed, pleased, until Sam murmured: "But then please don't do something like that with the zats again."

She knew she couldn't really order him to do anything but she never wanted to go through something like that again!

All that came from him though was silence and fearing she had crossed her boundaries, Sam looked to the ground, wrapping her arms around herself in the process. He sighed audibly and Sam heard him shift by the rustling of his clothes. Then, suddenly, he was in front of her, standing way too close all of a sudden. Sam kept her head down, but she still heard him when he said: "I'll try."

She nodded to tell him she'd heard it. Silence fell between them but unlike most of the quietness between them, this time it was awkward and uncomfortable. Sam felt pressured to say something, anything, just so they could escape this unpleasant silence but she had no idea how to begin. The atmosphere between them was strange and strained, making it unusually hard for the both of them to just bring up some light, unimportant topic to cross the distance between them.

It was Jack however, who suddenly broke the tense silence. "You don't want it, do you?" he asked quietly.

Confused, Sam looked up at him. He was standing with his arms hanging loosely at his sides and suddenly Sam felt overwhelmed by the urge to throw herself into his arms. She longed to feel him close but with the situation as it was she thought it wiser to hold back.

"What?" she asked instead, confused by his sudden change of topic.

"The marriage," he said. "You don't want it?"

Sam was baffled. How had he come to _that_ conclusion?! "What makes you think that?" she inquired.

He snorted sarcastically. "The fact that you looked about to faint in the briefing room and I haven't seen that look on you ever before."

Sam gnawed on her lower lip nervously. "That was because I thought _you_ didn't want it," she explained.

"Huh?" he answered confused.

"Sir, do you remember our conversation about remarrying?" she asked. "Before we received Daniel's message?"

"Yes. And?"

"You said you didn't want to remarry. So I thought you would have to hate the thought of being forced into a marriage with me just to escape a court-martial," she clarified.

Jack looked at her, blinking. Then, finally, she could see understanding dawn on his face. He'd probably gone through the conversation in his head once more and lastly seen what she'd been referring to.

"God, Carter!" he groaned. "I didn't mean it like _that_!"

Now Sam was left doing the blinking. She had no idea what there had been to misunderstand?

He began fidgeting with his hands. "I thought you were asking if I ever wanted to marry _another_ woman! Which I did not and will not. If I had had any chance to marry you, your single life woulda been over long ago. But I had no such chance and I didn't ever expect to _get_ such a chance, so I never considered that possibility much…"

Sam sniffled. Very undignified for a Major of the US Air Force, but who the fuck actually cared? The man she had loved secretly (and lately not so secretly) for years had finally admitted he wanted to marry her. For Jack O'Neill that was very close to a love declaration. Suddenly, life was fucking awesome!

"I want this…!" Sam admitted, choking. "God, you have no idea _how much_ I really want this!"

He smirked, a familiar, sexy grin Sam had gotten privileged to get to know lately. "Show me?" he encouraged.

Despite them being in a military base with surveillance cameras that hopefully weren't recording this, Sam closed the tiny distance between them and got onto her toes. He wasn't helping her but he was awaiting her. When Sam pressed her lips to his, he was ready, immediately moving his lips with hers with just the right amount of pressure. Perfectly synchronous, their heads tilted to the side, deepening the kiss, while his arms wound around her body, pulling her in to him. Sam clutched at his biceps with her hands, feeling the familiar strength he possessed under her fingers. Of course, with their separation and the worry, fear and concern for the other they had been through, their kiss didn't stay that chaste. It didn't take long until Sam felt Jack push closer and instinctively she pressed back, as near to him as possible. His mouth coaxed hers to open and she complied willingly. Immediately, his tongue was in her mouth, sliding all over hers. Sam responded eagerly, enjoying their close proximity as much as he did. She had never imagined they would get to do this ever again and the thought that she could now hold onto him again made it all the more special.

Soon they were panting with the need to breathe but neither wanted to let go of the other. In fact, Sam reached up with both hands to cup his jaw and pulled him in closer, desperate that he wouldn't leave her. In response, Jack shifted his grip on her, one hand entangling in her longer hair and the other going around her back. They were pressing so close to each other it bordered on uncomfortable but still it felt like they weren't close enough. Their kisses turned open-mouthed with the crushing need for oxygen but Sam only drew back when she felt she was about to collapse from the lack of air. She held onto him when she leaned back to greedily suck in breaths to stop the world from cartwheeling around her and reluctant to part from her, he leaned his forehead against hers. His fast breath wafted over her lips, mingling with her own. Sam became overly aware of his familiar, characteristic scent that engulfed her like a comforting blanket. And finally, the world felt right again.

He was still panting for air when he said: "Marry me, Carter."

Sam actually laughed at his way of phrasing it. "Yes sir, I'll sign the certificate," she agreed.

He shook his head. "No, Carter. I mean, yes, you _should_ sign that. But I didn't mean that."

Sam looked at him, confused.

" _Marry_ me, Carter," he insisted. "For real and for good."

Sam gaped at him, completely at a loss as to what to say when the meaning of his words finally settled in. "You mean…?" she asked, still convinced she was misunderstanding him.

"Oh, for crying out loud, Carter, _yes_ ," he said exasperated. "I know we'll already be considered married and I don't know about you, but I'm missing a ceremony. I want to have a real marriage. I want to see you walk down the aisle with Dad glaring at me. I wanna see Cassie cry half of the evening. I wanna get _the talk_ from Teal'c and I wanna see all your not-so-secret admirers hate me for I have what they can't ever have. And I wanna fight with you about thousands of unimportant things like flowers and cakes and speeches beforehand just like any couple would do. Not that cake isn't important but you get the meaning…"

Sam stared at him, speechless. Honestly, Sam would have been content with the way things had turned out, happy that at least she'd gotten him, but now that he described it, she felt herself wishing for the things he told of just as badly.

"Yes," she all but breathed. "Yes. Of course I'll marry you."

He grinned down at her widely, one of his rare, happy smiles. "Sweet."

Sam laughed, all of a sudden feeling freed, relaxed and content with the whole world. Reacting to her joy and elation, he pulled her in and swooped her up, effortlessly lifting her off her feet. Sam giggled and held onto his shoulders, now having to look down to see his face.

"You're gonna regret that, you know?" he teased her.

Sam put her hands to his face and then drew him in for another loving kiss he returned passionately. This time she had really intended for it to be a short, reassuring kiss, but apparently he had other plans. Sam groaned reflexively when he fired the kiss up.

"Sir…" she protested weakly.

"For crying out loud, Carter, will you stop with the 'sir' already?" he growled. "Or I will seriously have to think about retiring, 'cause I'll never be able to stand hearing it from you again while on duty!"

He closed back in on her but Sam stopped him once more. "Jack!" she insisted.

"Hm?" he inquired absentmindedly, only mildly interested going by the way one of his hands was travelling down towards her six.

"Ah, you do remember where we are…?" she asked, slightly distracted by the feelings he was stirring in her.

Jack halted and going by the movement of his head, Sam assumed he was looking around. She had to stifle the laughter that threatened to bubble up. He had completely forgotten they were in the General's office.

"Shit," he cursed heartfelt before setting her down.

Grumbling under his breath, Jack walked back to the desk, sulking. Smiling warmly at seeing him so laidback with her once again, Sam followed him. Jack picked up a pen from the Generals desk and then snatched up the certificate he'd dumped on the desk. He looked over to Sam and she smiled at him encouragingly. Then he signed the document with his typical, loopy signature before he handed her the document and the pen. Sam stared down at the official marriage license, somehow unable to believe she was finally getting to do this. She was allowed to marry her CO!

Speaking of said CO, Jack came to stand behind her, looking over her shoulder. "Problem?" he asked when she made no move to sign the document. His hands went to her waist, lightly playing with the hem of her BDU jacket, just to hold a connection to her.

Sam shook her head. "No, it's just… somehow I can't really believe we're finally being allowed to do this."

"I see," he said, understanding. Silently, he waited, giving her the time she needed.

Sam stared down on the paper, trying to burn the sight of his signature at the most important document she'd ever held in her hands in her life into her memory. She wanted to remember this monumental occasion! Then, she bent down and hastily scribbled her own signature next to his as if she would fear the moment could be taken from her if she would hesitate too long. When she was finished, she turned to him, still clutching the document in her hands.

"We're married…" she whispered, almost disbelieving although she had just signed the document.

He grinned at her, radiating happiness. "Congratulations, Mrs. O'Neill," he said cheekily.

Sam chuckled. "Oh? Didn't know I was supposed to take on your name."

"You're not," he replied and Sam knew immediately he meant it. He would never expect it from her knowing how much she valued her independence. Ironically, his acceptance of the way she was let her concentrate on what she really wanted. And surprisingly Sam felt herself want it.

"I'd like to," she admitted.

"Then, by all means, please do," Jack grinned, visibly pleased by her decision. And seeing how much he enjoyed her little gesture Sam felt it really had been the right thing to do.

Slightly smiling at his antics, Sam motioned over towards the door and the window going to the briefing room. "Don't you think we should go back? General Hammond is probably waiting for our decision. And he might want to use his office sometime."

Jack sighed but almost immediately she could see him snap back into soldier mode. "You're right. Let's go."

Together, they left the General's office and headed back into the briefing room. General Hammond was standing together with President Hayes with their backs towards them, talking amicably, and Teal'c still stood where Jack had left him back, his face an impassive mask. Sam was still slightly unsettled by seeing the President of the United States here, up close, at the SGC, but she could understand from what she'd gotten told about the foothold situation that he wanted to stay until everything was cleared up, seeing that he had been one of the victims and hostages.

Actually, Sam liked the President. She'd only spoken to him once but the impression she'd gotten was that of a practical, down-to-earth man who trusted his instincts and the advice he got from his subordinates. He didn't seem like the usual type of politicians who were only after the power and the status the job got them but someone who truly cared for the well-being of his country and Sam respected him for that. Still, seeing how much he seemed to want to involve himself in Sam's and Jack's situation left Sam slightly confused. What was it about their situation that was of such interest to someone like the President of the United States?

Upon hearing them approach, the General and President Hayes turned and simultaneously, Jack and Sam stopped in front of them.

"So, could you discuss everything?" General Hammond asked patiently.

"Yes sir," Jack answered for them and then held out the marriage license for him. The General grabbed it and shot a quick glance at it before showing it to Hayes.

"Well, congratulations on getting married," the General smiled at seeing what they had decided.

Sam felt Teal'c's hand clap onto her shoulder and out of the corner of her eyes she saw his other hand land on Jack's shoulder.

"Thank you, sir," they both answered while Sam reached up and laid a hand over Teal'c's to show him her gratitude for his congratulatory gesture.

"But we'd like to request something," Jack continued.

The General motioned for him to explain and Jack said: "I know we're already considered married by now but we'd like to have a real ceremony."

The General nodded. "That shouldn't be a problem, as long as you keep a few things in mind."

Sam and Jack exchanged a quick glance. "What things, sir?" Sam asked politely.

The General looked at them with a soft, pleased gaze that made a warm feeling spread through Sam. "With the job you do, your position at the front lines, the dangers that come from working at the Stargate Program, your importance and the enemies the SGC has off-world as well as on-world, your marriage to each other will have to be kept secret," he explained. "We can't chance _anyone_ to use your personal relationship against you, SG-1 or the SGC, so it will be need-to-know only, do you understand? Your married status will be highly classified so you can't just talk to anyone about it."

Sam couldn't prevent her face from falling. Sure, she understood the reasoning and the meaning behind the General's words and while she could live with not being able to shout from all roofs that, _finally_ , she was married to Colonel O'Neill, what really made her sad was…

"So I'm not able to take on his name?" she asked. He'd been so happy about that…

The General looked at the President for the split of a second, his face turning pensive, before he visibly came to a conclusion and said: "Major, I'm sorry but that isn't possible. It would be too much of a giveaway."

Sam was disappointed. Given, she hadn't given it much thought seeing as she'd always thought it impossible she'd ever find herself in such a situation, but now that she _had_ thought about it, she would have really liked to take on his name. She looked over to Jack and found him glancing right back at her, a small, encouraging smile on his lips.

"Nothing we can do about it, Carter," he said, trying to cheer her up.

Sam sighed. He was right. As much as they would have liked it to have worked out differently, maybe she should just be glad she had been allowed to marry him in the first place. As long as she could have him, Sam supposed she didn't really mind to keep on being 'Major Carter'. It would certainly save them a lot of work to explain to all their allies why she'd suddenly changed names. Sam cringed at thinking about how she would have to explain the concept of marriage and taking on another surname to someone like, say, the Asgard. Yeah, maybe it was better to just stay 'Major Carter'…

"So, if you want to hold a ceremony, you have my consent, but consider your situation and be careful about who you invite to the event," General Hammond warned.

Again, Sam and Jack nodded.

"And, while I'm glad how it has all turned out for you, unfortunately I can't give you some downtime for a honeymoon right now. Major Carter is desperately needed to get our whole security systems back on track. And I think Colonels Reynolds and Dixon will be very glad to give their temporary rank as 2IC of this base back to you, Colonel O'Neill," the General continued.

Sam saw Jack grimace slightly and imagined the shitload of paperwork he feared to get dumped on his head. Oh yeah, wasn't it good to be back?

"That's okay, sir," Sam answered in their stead. In fact, after their whole time-out on Laterra, the routine at the base would be a very welcome change.

"Alright," the General concluded. "Then take the rest of the day off and settle back in. Report to me tomorrow morning to resume your work."

"Yes sir," they both confirmed, before Sam continued: "Thank you, sir. For everything."

Jack nodded to her words, but the General waved them off. "You have earned it all and more with your actions."

Sam felt herself blush and averted her eyes. Just like the Colonel, she didn't do very well with compliments. In her opinion, she had just done her job.

"Well, that means my job here is done," President Hayes suddenly announced and Sam jumped slightly, having almost forgotten about him. With a few steps, he came forwards and as he'd done it the first time they had met, he extended his hand out for Sam to shake. Reflexively, Sam grabbed the offered hand.

"Congratulations on your marriage," Hayes said earnestly. "And it's good to have you back on the Program. We need men and women as experienced as you are. I'm sure our country will greatly profit by you working at the SGC."

It wasn't the first time Sam had been told something along those lines, but this time Sam was acutely aware that Hayes meant every word. His sincere voice and the heartfelt respect she saw shining from his eyes (that she had no idea how she'd even earned it) made the words more meaningful than a medal. And suddenly, Sam had a profound suspicion why Hayes had stuck around. It made her respect the man even more.

"Thank you, sir," she said with all the esteem she had for him from the short time they knew each other.

Sam felt Jack's gaze on her and when Hayes moved on to him, she observed them quietly. Just like with her, Hayes held out his hand for Jack to take and he complied, his dark eyes studying the man in a way that made Sam understand he was assessing him.

"You're not just 'Washington brass', are you?" Jack asked suddenly, sounding suspicious.

The President smiled conspiratorially. "Sorry, Colonel," he apologized. "I'm actually the President of the United States."

Jack's eyebrows shot up astonished and Sam knew immediately he'd only been told now.

"That was mean, sir," Jack said but going by the smile he still carried, it was safe to say he liked the other man enough to forget about it.

"It was a test, Colonel," the President revealed and now Sam was confused. Why did the President feel the need to test Jack? Jack didn't ask further so Sam knew he knew or had at least guessed the reasons and going by his unfaltering, confident stance Sam assumed he'd either believed he had passed whatever test he'd been in, or he didn't care. But since it was the President they were speaking about here, Sam couldn't imagine he didn't care at all.

"Thank you, sir," Jack said instead, mirroring Sam's words.

The President waved him off. "No need to thank me, I have an ulterior motive for interfering."

Jack inclined his head in understanding, although Sam didn't know what could be in for the President by helping them.

"So, why don't you two go and rest? I assume you'll need it after all that's happened. And I have a flight to catch," the President finally dismissed them.

Sam and Jack nodded, saluted and together with Teal'c, they left the briefing room, walking just the tiniest bit closer than they would have done beforehand.

General Hammond stared after them and after a moment he realized the President was too. "Mr. President?" General Hammond asked when the man made no sign to move out for the aforementioned flight.

"Aaahh…" the President sighed, smiling widely. "Don't you just love yourself a happy ending?"

General Hammond nodded, knowing full well what the President was referring to. And he had even had the pleasure of having to watch this little dance they had now officially ended for years…

"You were right," Hayes continued suddenly. "They are outstanding officers."

Again, General Hammond nodded to the other man's words.

"I expect great things from them," Hayes continued.

"They already have done great things," General Hammond replied.

"True," Hayes agreed. "But somehow I have a feeling this isn't the end of their way."

General Hammond grinned. He remembered numerous times where he had thought similar things about his flagship team.

"It's good SG-1 is back," General Hammond summed it up. After all, SG-1 hadn't only been another SG team, they had always been the first team, the team all others were looking up to and tried to follow their example as best as possible and the team that always handled all the hardships the SGC got thrown at them. SG-1 was General Hammond's team of experts and he was glad to have it back.

"Mhm," the President agreed, before inquiring: "Do they know yet…?"

General Hammond shook his head. "No," he said. "I'll tell them tomorrow. Let's let them rest. A lot has happened today."

"Of course," Hayes nodded in agreement.

* * *

 _A/N: Challenge to myself to marry off Jack and Sam to each other without one of them having to leave their posts at the SGC to make it work: check, I'd say._


	57. Loving

_**Author's notes**_ _: Again, thank you all for reading, following and reviewing!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Seven – Loving_

Together with Teal'c, Jack and Sam meandered down the hallway to the elevator. Wherever they met another officer, they had to stop and exchange a few words because seemingly everyone wanted to tell them how glad they were they were back at the SGC. Word sure travelled fast around the base, Sam thought astonished, when everyone apparently already knew that they had been reinstated. And Sam thought they had to thank Sergeant Harriman for that, who had been suspiciously fast on his way out from the meeting.

When they had finally reached the elevator and entered, Jack punched the button for Level 25 with habitual routine. Sam watched the numbers fly by on the elevator's display while Jack talked with Teal'c and suddenly, Sam wondered if they even had private quarters on Level 25 anymore. They had been gone for about half a year, surely they would have given these quarters over to other officers already? And then another thought dawned on Sam. What was with their houses? They had left everything behind with their abrupt escape without making any arrangements. They hadn't expected to ever need their things again, because even if they could have imagined returning someday they had only seen themselves getting imprisoned, so there hadn't seemed to be a need for their houses and other things, but now they were right where they had left off: working at the SGC. So what had happened to their belongings during their absence?

The elevator halted and routinely Jack and Teal'c made their way down the corridor. Sam followed them warily. But when they finally came to SG-1's corner, Sam was in for a surprise. There were still their names pinned next to their former quarters. Apparently they hadn't reassigned their private quarters to other officers. Slightly baffled, Sam halted and stared at the familiar name tag attached to the wall next to her quarters' door.

"Carter?" Jack prompted her when she made no move to get in.

"Sir… they're still our quarters…" she whispered, stunned.

"Yeah. And?"

"I mean, we were gone for six months with no prospect of returning! Why didn't they reassign our quarters?" she clarified her confusion while turning to look at him. Only now he seemed to become aware of it and a frown passed over his handsome face.

It was Teal'c however, who cut in to explain. "Daniel Jackson was adamant they kept it your quarters as long as the search was still continuing."

"Daniel?" Jack asked while Sam inquired: "They were still searching for us? This long? Why? We had long since passed the three-months-mark."

"I believe it was Senator Kinsey who demanded the search was continued," Teal'c answered.

Sam's eyes narrowed and she could see a knowing expression flicker over Jack's face, telling her he had been aware or had guessed as much. Kinsey. Of course. They really had to be careful with the man. Since they had their new powers he had shown an unusual interest in them that made Sam uncomfortable.

Teal'c continued, seemingly unaware of their thoughts: "Daniel Jackson also assured they did not touch your houses. He could not do anything about your labs or offices though. The SGC needed access to them to successfully continue operations."

Sam nodded in understanding, a warm smile passing over her expression. That was Daniel for you. Not only had he taken care of everything, from the looks of it he had also all the time believed they would return and therefore had kept everything in shape for them. He really was a true friend!

Looking back to her name plate next to her quarters, Sam nevertheless felt slightly confused. They had been gone for a half year but apparently nothing had changed. It was as if they hadn't been gone. Their whole lives continued on as if nothing had happened at all. And seeing how much had changed for Sam, it felt strangely surreal. She knew she should be glad that she'd gotten the chance to continue with her life and her job, but her head still had problems coming to terms with it, because the odds had been so against them Sam hadn't even let herself fantasize about this possibility and now she had trouble connecting back to her life.

"I believe we should all rest," Teal'c suggested when nobody said a word or moved, Jack and Sam totally lost in their thoughts.

"Good idea, buddy," Jack said but he sounded distracted.

Teal'c nodded and without another word, he disappeared in his quarters. Jack followed him with his eyes until he was gone and then he shook his head as if to clear it. Sam watched him turn to her and then he held something out to her: a keycard. Sam gazed at it astonished. She'd totally forgotten she would need that to get access to, well, everything here on base…

"Thank you," she said while taking it. "Where did you get that?"

He played with his own while answering: "Teal'c gave it to me in the elevator. Apparently General Hammond has handed him those in case everything would be going as planned. We're still kinda locked out of the system, but these have temporary codes that will allow us access to all important areas until you've gotten us back into the system."

"That's a good sign, huh?" Sam replied.

"Probably."

Sam swiped her card through her quarters' slot and the door opened smoothly. Although this was exactly what had happened uncountable times before, Sam was somehow astonished it had worked this time. For some reason she had expected to be denied access.

"Hey, Carter?" Jack asked suddenly.

She turned back to him and found him standing right behind her. "Yes?"

"Can I…?" he began and then motioned towards her quarters. Sam understood immediately, but she hesitated. She would have wanted nothing more than for him to go in there with her, but as training and habit ensured, she contemplated if that would be appropriate. Yes, they were married now, but their marriage was to be kept low-key and it wasn't exactly inconspicuous if he would spend the night in her quarters. But Sam would have killed for his presence right now and going by the starved expression in his face he needed it as much as she did. So she did the only thing she really could. She nodded.

Relieved, he stepped up to her, his own keycard going back into the breast pocket of his BDUs and together they entered her quarters. Sam looked around but now she wasn't astonished anymore to find everything as she'd left it behind. It was as if time had frozen for the SGC while it had continued on for Jack and Sam. A strange feeling.

A dull _thump_ let her look up from her silent musings and she noticed Jack had let himself fall onto her bed. He was lazily kicking his unlaced boots off, letting them fall onto the ground wherever they landed, and soon his BDU jacket came flying after them. Sam chuckled, not really minding that he was destroying all semblance of order she was upholding in her room.

He stretched on the bed, his arms fanning out left and right from him, his feet dangling over the edge. "Oh, so much better," he sighed. "A real bed."

Sam grinned and began to unlace her own boots. Together with her socks, she placed them neatly to the side and then hung her jacket over her desk chair. Stepping over his spilled clothes, she made her way over to her bed and sat down on the edge. Jack had his eyes closed, a relaxed expression on his face. He inhaled deeply and then murmured: "Hah. Your scent… How I missed that."

Sam laid down and snuggled up into his side. Automatically, his arm came down and wrapped around her back. Sam buried her head into her favorite spot at his shoulder, her forehead coming to rest against his throat. Slowly, his scent began to engulf her and she could feel the tension that had dominated her body these last days leave her bit by bit. "I know what you mean," she murmured.

For a long time they just lay there, side by side, silent with their eyes closed. They were soaking in the other's presence, taking comfort and strength from it. Sam had one hand clutched into the black t-shirt over Jack's stomach to hold on to him and as if to reassure her, he laid his free hand over hers, his thumb slowly stroking circles on the back of her hand. Sam knew he had fallen asleep when the comforting caress finally stopped. She knew she should probably sleep as well, but her mind was still too busy going through everything that had happened to let her rest properly. They had saved Earth and by some miracle, they had both survived. They had lost Daniel however, something Sam mourned greatly. SG-1 just wouldn't be the same without him.

They had both been spared from a court-martial, because, apparently, they hadn't just made foes in their time in the SGC but gotten a few supporters, too, to which, by the looks of it, the President of the United States belonged.

And they had let her marry Jack. Given, they certainly hadn't done it as a favor to them but out of some necessity, but the outcome was the same. She was Jack O'Neill's wife. Not only lover or girlfriend, but his _wife_.

If Daniel had still been here, this would have been all Sam could have wished for. She knew it was still more than she could have ever wished for given what they had done, so she was happy. But the thought of Daniel's death was still putting a serious damper on the mood. She was ecstatic and over the moon in joy, but she also really missed her friend. She was more than glad she had gotten Jack back but there was still a hole in her heart from Daniel's death. It was a strange, confusing mix of emotions.

Somehow there was just no way they could ever be just happy, could there? Was this karma? Was she not allowed to be this happy without experiencing something equally sad? Irritated with herself, Sam shook her head, careful that she wasn't waking Jack. They had given their all and with their jobs it could happen all the time that someone close to you died. She would just need time to accept that fact. Much time.

Sam nuzzled closer to Jack and listened to his steady heartbeat, hoping to get lulled to sleep by the soothing rhythm. She had some rough nights behind her with much crying and very little sleep, so she desperately needed the rest. And tomorrow, she would return to her old life. No repairing of Ancient technology anymore, no more stealing food to survive. She and Jack were back to Earth and could move about freely. They didn't need to hide anymore. And they were still together. Still a team, still a family, even more so than before.

They had gone through so much together and in the end had also gained much. They had turned their steady relationship into a rock-solid one that stood unwavering, having strengthened them in the process. They had control over their powers and had finally come to terms with them, now accepting them as a part of them like a character trait or a body part. They had their families and friends back. They had their jobs back. They would still play a vital part in the SGC and Earth's Stargate Program. They were both still military and would continue to serve their country with everything they got. They would go off-world with SG-1 again and build relationships with alien races. Finally, everything had played out and they didn't need to worry about anything anymore. They were back. Back where they truly belonged. And they were together. Married even.

Sam smiled, finally feeling her lids grow heavy. Blinking, she felt herself slip into sleep and she relaxed when she felt Jack's warm body next to hers, drawing comfort from the fact that he was with her and that he would stay with her. When sleep claimed her, Sam gave herself over, finally at peace.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

It felt like the middle of the night when Sam woke up. Yawning, she shot a quick glance over to the small bedside table where her alarm clock sat. With a soft glowing light, it proudly displayed the time: 0206. So it actually _was_ still in the middle of the night.

Confused, Sam rolled over onto her side and snuggled deeper into the blanket she was lying on. Then she frowned. She recognized the scent of the standard SGC's washing detergent, which told her she was in her private quarters on base, but from the feeling of it she was lying on top of the blanket instead of under it. And she was still in her clothes, from what she could feel. Geez, Sam thought, had she pulled another all-nighter and fallen unconscious on her bed before she had had the chance to shed her clothes? No, somehow that didn't feel quite right.

Still half-asleep, Sam sat up and habitually began to take off her clothes, for once just dropping them on the ground and vowing inwardly she would put them away first thing in the morning, after she'd had a decent night of sleep. She felt as if run over by a truck. For a moment she considered searching for the pajamas she kept somewhere in her quarters, but laziness won out and deciding her panties and t-shirt would do just as well, Sam slipped under the blanket. With a content sigh, she curled into one of her favorite sleeping positions, intending to go back to sleep, but something still nagged her.

Suddenly, memory checked back in and Sam's head shot up. Jack! Where was he?

Sam patted around on the bed but aside from a still warm spot where he'd lain she didn't find anything. He wasn't there anymore. Had he gone back to his quarters? Slightly disappointed that he'd just snuck out on her in the middle of the night, Sam laid back down and drew the blanket up to her nose. She knew he was probably only considerate of the circumstances and the image they had to keep up, but still, would it have hurt if he had spent one night with her? They were married, for god's sake! They had every right–

Sam was interrupted in her thoughts when a sudden beam of light cut into the darkness of her room. Surprised, Sam looked up and saw Jack come from the small bathroom attached to her private quarters. Oh, she thought stunned. He hadn't left at all.

She watched him step out of the small bathroom, yawning, while one of his hands scrubbed through his adorably tousled hair. The other hand lifted through the crack of the door to switch off the lights when he noticed her looking at him and halted mid-movement.

"Sam," he said with a hoarse voice that told her he'd just woken up. "Did I wake you?"

Sam shook her head.

Forgetting about the bathroom's light, he walked over, his bare feet padding almost noiselessly over the concrete ground. Sam watched his figure move over in what little light came from the bathroom. He sat down at the edge of the bed and looked back at her for a moment before he said: "I should probably go back to my own room. I didn't mean to fall asleep in here in the first place."

Sam knew. And she certainly hadn't expected anything else from him. Still, she couldn't help the disappointment that washed over her.

"I don't want you to go," she admitted quietly. In the next moment, Sam regretted having said that. He probably didn't want to go either but he had to. And she was definitely not making it any easier for him with her sulking.

His dark eyes observed her for a heartbeat and Sam could feel the automatic blush crawl into her pale cheeks. Damn his intense gaze!

"Then I'll stay," he decided.

Surprised, Sam lifted her head from her pillow. Holding herself up with one elbow, she looked at him astonished. "Really?"

He grinned down on her. "Sam, you should know I don't care a great deal about what others may think. So I couldn't care less what rumors they will sprout after finding out about this here. I just don't want you to be uncomfortable."

Sam was elated. She could pretend to ignore whatever would be made out of this if it meant he would stay, she was certain of it. And they were already married, so what did it matter if there were rumors? It wasn't as if they could get them in a court-martial.

"Stay," she invited.

He nodded and got up. For a moment he hesitated and Sam was about to ask what the problem was now when he moved and Sam heard his clothes rustle. From the slight metallic clinking sound of his belt, Sam knew he was shedding his pants so he could sleep more comfortably. For a second, Sam wondered if that was all he was taking off when he slid under the blanket next to her, his large frame immediately eating up most of the bed's space. When he laid down, Sam snuggled up close and was immediately greeted with his t-shirt's material under her face when she laid her cheek onto his upper torso. So he'd only taken off his pants.

He shifted beneath her until he decided he was finally comfortable and then Sam felt one of his hands slide over her back. It was a comforting caress, one of the gestures he did before falling asleep to assure himself of her presence, but he suddenly stopped his caress when his fingers reached a bare spot on her lower back, where her t-shirt had ridden up. Sam felt his fingers wander over the hem seam of her panties and she knew immediately he was taken by surprise when he had expected to be greeted with her pants' belt.

"Carter?" he asked with an unidentifiable voice.

"Hm?" she answered, slightly unsure if he was perhaps angry when he reverted to her surname.

"You're not half-naked under that blanket, are you?"

Sam was confused. So what if she was? She was wearing underwear and a t-shirt just like he was. What was wrong with that? It was certainly more comfortable to sleep in than her whole BDUs. "So what if I am?" she asked back.

"Oh, for crying–" he mumbled, sounding exasperated.

She drew slightly back from him. "What's the problem?" she inquired, knowing she sounded somewhat defensive by now. "It's not really comfortable to sleep in complete BDUs!"

She knew she had done that uncountable times off-world, so she was aware that she could sleep even when in complete battle gear. Just as he knew. But they weren't off-world. They were on Earth, within Cheyenne Mountain, in their private quarters, so Sam felt she had every right to sleep as comfortable as she wanted. They weren't on a mission that would require her to keep her boots on!

Jack turned and got up, and Sam fell back into her pillow when his body suddenly moved out from under hers. Taken by surprise, she wanted to ask what was wrong, but she didn't get to that.

He shifted, his body rolling over onto hers and suddenly he was on her, his lips finding hers in the half-darkness of the room with astonishing precision. Sam did a little yelp in surprise that he swallowed when his lips crashed onto hers, the kiss turning passionate and wild immediately. He pressed close to her and his mouth coaxed hers to open. Sam complied almost habitually and then welcomed his tongue. She threw her arms around his shoulders and one of her legs over his thigh that rested in between her legs to hold him above of her. Jack's hand that had just been at the small of her back now came to rest on her stomach. She felt his fingers slide over her shirt and when he found the hem they disappeared under it. His calloused hand caressed her stomach, dragging her shirt up her body with the movements until his fingers reached the underside of a breast. Sam's breath hitched automatically with anticipation, knowing his touches and the feelings they invoked in her by now, but he didn't go any further. He broke the kiss and looked down on her, his face that was half-hidden in the darkness of the room with the bathroom's light falling onto him from behind looking almost dangerous.

"Where's your bra?" he asked raspy.

"Same place where my pants are," Sam answered honestly. Somewhere on the ground.

Jack groaned and let his head fall down, coming to lie on her collarbone. Immediately, Sam felt the need to defend herself again. "What? It's really not comfortable to sleep in!"

Jack grumbled incoherently from his point on her shoulder and Sam felt the vibrations go through her whole body. "Please tell me you didn't sleep like that when off-world…" he almost pleaded.

Sam had no idea what his problem was. "Well not often since we mostly had to stay in uniform, but sometimes…" she admitted.

Again he groaned and the hand he still had under her shirt tightened around her side. Then he lifted his head and his eyes almost burned into hers when he said: "Okay Carter, we have to set some ground rules or this won't work!"

She raised an eyebrow and waited for him to explain.

He sighed. "We need to be inconspicuous so we won't give anything about our… relationship away. And that means we will have to act purely professional while on duty."

"Yes," Sam nodded, immediately understanding where this was going. "So no touching intimately at the base?"

"And on missions," Jack sighed, sounding only half-convinced by his own words.

"Okay," Sam agreed, seeing the sense in his words, even if she knew it would be difficult to keep her hands off of him all the time. "What else?"

"From now on, you're going to sleep in Teal'c's tent!"

Sam was perplexed. "Why?" she wanted to know.

Jack let his hand travel up to cup her breast, his thumb stroking over her nipple leisurely. "Because we need decent sleep on missions and I sure as hell won't get any shut-eye if I'm distracted with imagining what or what not you're wearing within your sleeping bag," he said.

Sam sighed content, her eyelids shutting due to the feelings his caress was evoking in her. "Alright," she consented, but Sam was pretty sure she would have agreed to anything at this point as long as he didn't stop what he was doing. "Anything else?"

"Well, we will have to settle a few things, for example where we're going to live," Jack continued, his mouth moving over Sam's jaw while he spoke.

Sam gasped and dug her fingers into his shoulders when he began to suck on the sensitive skin over her pulse point.

"L-live?" she stuttered, losing coherence pretty fast.

"We're married," he said smugly after releasing her flushed skin. "We should move in with each other, don'tcha think?"

"Oh god, yes," Sam mumbled when Jack pinched her nipple and began to suck on the other one through her shirt. Given, it hadn't been an answer to his question, but seeing that it fit nonetheless, Sam decided to leave it at that. Speaking was hard as it was already…

"So, we'd have to discuss where we want to live," Jack continued while simultaneously pushing her shirt up. "Your place, mine or maybe we'd buy something new…"

Sam stretched and wriggled out of her shirt. She arched into him to get it around her shoulders and head and immediately she felt his warm hand on her back, holding her up against him so that his talented tongue could draw random patterns on the skin of her chest. Sam all but threw her shirt away, her body too warm to need it anyways and her attention all distracted for her to care where the shirt landed.

"And then there's always the wedding to consider," Jack went on, the air of his breath blowing cold onto her heated skin he'd trailed wet kisses onto.

Sam shuddered and in an automatic reaction to his caress, her body grew warm and heavy. Her breathing got faster and was losing its steady rhythm. Her blood rushed through her body, echoing in her ears and it became increasingly difficult to leave her eyes open. Jack's words washed over her and instead of concentrating on what he was actually saying, Sam only focused on his familiar, addicting voice that spoke to her with a low, satisfied tone while her body lit up with every touch of his.

It hadn't been that long since they had been together the last time, but seeing that Sam hadn't believed to ever have this again, every caress of his hands and every stroke of his tongue felt special and exceptional, her body reacting with an unusual strength.

Sam opened her eyes and followed his slow movements. He held himself above her with his legs and one arm, his back a broad shield around her body. His shoulders and his head were illuminated from the light shining from the bathroom behind him, from time to time shining into his features as well. Sam saw his clenched jaw, an indication how much he had to control himself, and the taut muscles of his neck and throat. His eyes were dark spots in his face, glittering only when a stray ray of light captured them, but Sam knew unfailingly that they never left her for a moment. She could feel his gaze wander all over her body much like she felt his hands do the same.

He laid her back onto the sheets and then let his free hand slide down her body towards her thigh. Sam gasped and without even noticing she curved into his touch, longing to get even closer to him. He opened his mouth to say something, but Sam interrupted him, much more interested in other things he could do with his mouth than have a discussion with him right now. _Any time_ , really, but not now.

"Y'know, I'm all in for that, but perhaps we should talk about all these things _afterwards_?" Sam suggested, proud of herself that she had managed to formulate an adequate answer to his questions.

He shifted upwards so he leaned over her once more. For a moment, Sam feared he was about to argue, or stall, so she threw her legs around his hips and pulled him in to her, simultaneously rocking her hips against his.

He cursed colorfully when their hips bumped together, bringing her center into close contact with his erection. Sam forgot to breathe, surprised by the rush of heat that flooded her body from her own actions. The muscles in her lower belly and her thighs twitched irregularly and made her move against him involuntarily. A familiar warmth began to gather in Sam's lower body and Sam bit down on her lip when the friction between them pressed her underwear against her hot center. With an irritated swear, Jack's hand snapped down to her hip and held her firmly in place so she couldn't move anymore, his fingers digging into her flesh from the strength he used on her.

"Afterwards…" he mumbled out of breath as soon as he had regained control. "Yeahsureyoubetcha."

"Good," Sam decided and then stretched to pull his shirt over his head.

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Jack lifted his torso up so Sam could drag his shirt over his head and gritted his teeth when the change in position pressed his arousal even more into her warm center. His boxer shorts and her flimsy panties weren't enough of a barrier so he wouldn't notice. And going by the way she halted mid-movement, his shirt falling down between them, she had noticed, too.

Jack gripped the shirt and unceremoniously flung it away from the bed, not sparing it a second thought. His whole concentration was focused on the woman beneath him. His _wife_. God, the thought alone was enough for the crushing urge to throw himself at her to claw into his insides painfully, but Jack kept it in check. He had almost lost her, had almost lost any and all chances to ever have this with her again and he was so glad to have gotten a second chance that he wanted to enjoy the moment. It meant much to him and he wanted her to know that, so he was taking special care with each touch. He wanted to show her what it meant to him, what _she_ meant to him. He didn't want to make the same mistakes all over again and when he would eventually die for good, he wanted to die with the knowledge that she _had_ known. Known of his feelings for her.

So Jack practically worshipped her. He let his hands roam over her body with careful but intentional strokes, trying to burn the feeling of her skin under his fingers into his memory. Wherever his body didn't block it out, the bathroom's light shone onto her and Jack could watch. He watched her body writhe underneath his from his ministrations. He watched her fight to keep her eyes open, but whenever he hit a particularly sensitive spot she would lose the battle momentarily and her eyes would flutter close. He watched her back arch so she would stay connected with his touch when he moved and her neck bend to give him better access when he travelled from kissing her mouth to the spot behind her ear he had taken a certain liking to. He watched his own, tanned hands slide all over her paler body, marveling at the contrast. She was in almost every aspect his complete opposite but just like two oppositely charged magnets they were attracted to the other, completely unable to fight the pull that drew them towards each other. And despite her strength, her body was soft and it was a remarkable contrast to his own tense body. Jack just couldn't get enough of touching it and he enjoyed every second of it, knowing that he'd almost missed out on the chance to ever do it again.

He bent down and began trailing hot, wet kisses from her jaw down her throat, loving how that made her breath hitch and her pulse race even faster. He swirled his tongue over her collarbone and in response, her hands that were stroking over the muscles on his back halted and her fingernails dug in hard enough to leave marks. Not that he minded. The thought that she was marking him was intoxicating and with an approving growl, Jack bit down at her shoulder. Not enough to make it hurt, but certainly hard enough to leave a mark of his own. He felt he had every right to now, although he should try to keep in mind to do it somewhere it couldn't be publicly seen afterwards or Sam's supposedly single status would be busted immediately.

Jack let his tongue travel down her body and watched her reactions. She was shivering under his ministrations wherever he touched and she arched to follow his every caress. Her breathing had gotten erratic but Jack's matched hers. She was warm beneath his hands and slowly, he saw sweat beginning to cover her body with a light sheen. Her gasps and moans filled the silent air, together with the crinkling sound of the sheets and her bandages when she gripped onto the blanket when he finally got out of her reach. Jack took his time to let his tongue swirl at her lower belly, right over her panties, his teeth occasionally joining in, and this got her to wriggle beneath him. Her thighs were pushing together in an automatic reaction and Jack was amazed at the strength with which they pressed against his shoulders that were in the way.

"Jack…!" she breathed his name and he looked up, watching her upper body writhing. Her hands were twisting in the sheets and he knew instinctively she'd rather have a connection to him, a hold that would ground her in the storm of feelings she was going through.

Jack complied and slid up her body until he was level with her eyes again. Immediately, her hands went around his back and held on. Her leg inched higher until it was wrapped around his thigh and with a not-so-subtle push she dug her calf into his six, trying to get him to come closer. Watching her reaction, Jack obeyed and lowered himself down onto her. When their heated bodies finally came into direct contact, she whimpered, her head falling back, and he had to bite down on his teeth hard to not lose it. He was determined to hold on. He was determined to make this last.

Her chest was pressing into his with every frantic breath she took and he could feel her body heat seep over into his own body, although his hadn't been cold to begin with. Jack gently grabbed hold of her chin to pull her in to him and with slow movements he kissed her, his tongue leisurely dipping into her mouth, only to retreat when she tried to turn the kiss more passionate. They had all the time in the world.

She grunted frustrated when he made no move to take it to the next step but she didn't break the kiss, either. She was ready to take what he would give, however much that was.

Jack let his hand trail down her body to her thigh that was still lying next to his legs and when he caressed the smooth skin there he almost smiled. Modern civilization really had them back. In slow circles he let his fingers wander up her thigh until they were running over her hipbone. Sam's breath got stuck somewhere in her throat and their kiss finally broke when she lost the rhythm. She looked at him from under her lowered lids and he gazed right back. He could see the plea in her eyes and he knew what she wanted. With a fast move she hadn't expected, he pushed her panties aside and cupped her. She moaned and her body jerked uncontrolled. Lazily, Jack began to stroke her, his touches still light. He watched as she threw her head back from the bliss, her eyes falling close and a blush spreading over her cheeks and neck. Bit by bit, he turned his caresses more intentional and began to put more pressure into them. He kept hitting the spots he knew would make her buck beneath him and she began moving her hips in sync with his strokes to increase the friction.

"Jack… more…!" she begged, a frown overtaking her expression when the friction wasn't enough to take her to the usual heights.

Again, he complied wordlessly and slipped a finger into her. He felt her adjust to the intrusion almost immediately and let another finger follow. She sighed when he began to slowly pump them in and out, creating a steady rhythm. He knew it wouldn't be enough, neither for her nor for him. It did feel good, the friction his fingers created enough to soothe her ache for a while and a primal satisfaction for him to see her ride higher in ecstasy, but it was only a weak imitation of the act they both longed to complete.

By now Jack was almost seeing stars from the pain his arousal was inflicting on him. He gritted his teeth hard enough to hear one of them crack forebodingly and his whole lower body from his stomach down was feeling as if on fire. He longed to let go. He _needed_ to let go, so badly. Sweat was running down his body in streams and his muscles had locked up tight, making his movements hard and difficult. Once more, Jack lowered his forehead down to lean it against hers, seeking out her eyes. Her gaze was hazy and unfocused and her rash breath was hitting his face way too fast.

"Sam…" he all but growled.

She looked at him, her complete expression all abandoned lust and passion and something within him snapped. He faintly heard something rip. Dimly, Jack realized that he had pulled his fingers from her and gripped her panties, the last obstacle between them aside from his boxer shorts. And forgetting about his strength for a moment, he'd apparently ripped her underwear. Inwardly cursing he grabbed the shreds and let them fall down onto the floor. He'd buy her new ones, he promised silently.

Sam however seemingly hadn't noticed, because she didn't say a thing to it. So Jack continued as if nothing had happened and shed his own underwear, now more careful with his strength. Not because he cared about his clothing but because he didn't want to hurt her accidentally.

The moment they were both free from all hindering obstacles, she reached out for him and again he brought their bodies together, now connected from head to toe. Flushed, heated skin met with hot, sweaty skin and the feeling of finally coming together was incredible.

Jack heard Sam sigh out loud. Her legs parted immediately, making room for him to lie down between them and he followed the lead. Instantly his erection bumped against her hot center and they both groaned. A tingle began to claw into Jack's spine and to his dismay he noticed he wasn't holding on as good as he'd hoped. But given the way she rocked herself absentmindedly against him, her head thrown back in delight, she wasn't that far away, either.

Jack grabbed the leg that was still lying next to his under her knee and bent it up. She looked at him, her eyes full of anticipation and with one powerful thrust he was inside her. She cried out and for a moment she tensed up, her back arching up from the bed so that her chest was flush with his, before she managed to relax herself once more. Her hands clawed into him, one of them clutching onto his back while the other fisted his hair, but Jack didn't mind. The slight pain helped him focus.

But Jack knew it had been over the moment he'd grabbed her knee. With him now fully inside of her, there was no way he could keep it slow and leisure. Passion and lust were gripping him with a crushing hold and every instinct within him screamed at him to let loose. He wanted nothing more than to drive into her, fast and deep, to satisfy their desires. But he also didn't want to hurt her and with his superior strength that was something he had to keep in mind.

Carefully, Jack began to move, setting a slow pace to begin with. Instantly, Sam was moving with him, her hips meeting his every thrust. He couldn't keep it slow and so he upped the speed almost immediately. The friction was indescribable. Jack's mouth turned completely dry and breathing became seriously difficult, because all his body's focus seemed to concentrate on his lower regions that were connected with Sam. She was gasping and panting, and her body twitched and jerked uncontrolled whenever he hit one of her sensitive spots. By now Jack had a fairly accurate knowledge of her body and he managed to drive her wild underneath him rather fast. Which was good, because he wasn't sure how long he would still be able to hold on.

He thrust into her, his pace faltering. He was losing control of his movements and first tiny spasms were gripping the muscles on his back. Fighting to hold out, Jack shifted his weight and thus the angle, hoping to get her to the point where he was, and almost immediately her body trashed underneath him.

With shaky movements, she reached out for him and her hands cupped his jaw, pulling him in to her until they looked right into each other's eyes. Her blue eyes were blazing, all alive and expressive and Jack knew what she was doing. She was letting him see everything. She seemed to have understood how he needed to see everything, how he enjoyed watching her and now she let him see her in her last moments, before she would come undone. She held his gaze until her body locked up completely and then went into wild spasms. She cried out in bliss and her eyes fell shut, but she held onto him. The view she was displaying when her orgasm overtook her made Jack's iron self-control snap finally. With an inarticulate grunt he all but felt his orgasm explode throughout his body. His muscles shook uncontrolled and he lost all sense of equilibrium. The world cartwheeled around him and he tightened his grip on Sam, who was the last connection he had to his surroundings. His whole body was shuddering violently under the onslaught of emotions and the release was so freeing, so totally satisfying and powerful Jack lost sight of anything else. All he could feel was his release and Sam's body pressed flush to his.

When the world finally checked back in with him, Jack noticed his head had fallen down to Sam's neck. His breathing was erratic and his ears rang. His blood still sped noticeably through his body and going by the pulse he saw racing at Sam's throat, it was the same for her. His body was hot and sweaty, but Jack knew it would cool down soon, so he felt around for the blanket and with a wobbly movement he dragged it over their joined bodies. Sam's arms and legs were still wrapped around him like a shield, but slowly, he felt her body going limp and lax. He gently disentangled himself from her and rose, thinking that his whole weight had to be uncomfortable for her to be stuck under.

When he raised his head, she turned to look at him, a wide, satisfied smile spreading over her face. Jack grinned back automatically. She looked exhausted, spent and utterly happy and seeing this expression, Jack felt something within him swell. He studied her features, trying to memorize everything about her. She looked peaceful and relaxed. Jack felt his own face soften at her expression and tentatively, he reached up to lay a hand on her cheek. With careful strokes, as if she was made out of glass, he ran his fingers over her cheek, caressing her still hot skin. She looked at him, slightly confused.

Jack leaned down and kissed her, a light, chaste but loving kiss. When he drew back, she was smiling and again, he felt himself respond in kind.

"I love you, Sam," he said earnestly. Jack was aware he hadn't outright told her until now, even though he had tried telling her with his actions, but there was no way he couldn't _not_ say it now. He knew it sounded sappy, but he was almost bursting with the love he felt for her and the joy that he still was with her. And he really wanted her to know. He needed her to know.

Her eyes began to swim with tears, but she smiled, one of her big, radiant smiles that always took hold of his heart. He leaned down until he hovered directly above her, drinking in the happy expression she was showing.

"I love you," he repeated. "So much."

A single tear rolled down her cheek but he didn't react to it. He knew it was a happy tear.

The hand she had still kept in his hair came around and she mirrored his caress, slowly running her fingers down his cheek, her bandages lightly brushing his skin every now and then. "Thank you," she whispered, knowing what it took him to admit his feelings like that.

For a second, they were both silent, lost in the feeling of the moment, but slowly Jack felt himself tire. They had both spent their whole energy and sleep was tugging at their bodies.

Carefully, Jack rolled to the side and pulled her with him. He put his arms around her and Sam buried her head into his neck. He felt her sigh content into the hollow between his neck and shoulder and slowly, her body grew heavy in his arms, telling him she had relaxed in his embrace.

Jack waited until sleep had claimed her, all the while lazily stroking one of his hands over her naked back. He just loved the feeling of her skin and he couldn't seem to let go, now that he was finally allowed to touch it as often and much as he wanted.

Sleepily, Jack realized that almost all of this he owed to Daniel. Without him he would neither be here with her nor married to her. And he couldn't even thank his best friend for that. But Jack was determined to make the best out of it. He wouldn't waste this chance. Now that he finally had Sam, there was nothing that would get him away from her. She was stuck with him forever. And wasn't that thought making him smile like an idiot.

Slowly, Jack felt sleep take over. His body was growing heavy and his movements stopped. His eyes blinked rapidly and then stayed close. Giving up, Jack made himself comfortable and with his nose pressed into Sam's hair so he could inhale her scent, he drifted off into a deep slumber.


	58. Reuniting

_**Author's notes**_ _: Thank you all for reading, following and all your encouraging words for the last chapter. That really is such a help!_

 _And on with even more fluff._

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Eight – Reuniting_

Sam exited from her bathroom, freshly showered and properly dressed. It was nice to have fresh BDUs that had been washed with more than simple soap whenever they had had some to spare. Yeah, modern civilization really had its benefits. Shampoo, shower gel, toothpaste, deodorant, shavers, washing detergent and so much more! Not that Sam regretted a moment on Laterra, but she had to admit that it was a whole lot better to be back on Earth. She knew she would think about it very differently if regulations had forced Jack away from her again or he'd really died. But so she was back on her planet, had the job back she had practically been living for and was married to the man of her dreams. Life could be worse.

The door behind her swished open and Sam knew without turning that Jack was back to get her. Earlier, when they had woken up, he'd taken her keycard and gone to his room to shower and change, seeing that they really couldn't get under the General's eyes the way they had looked after their night together.

"I'm done," he announced and after casting a quick glance at her, he added: "You're not."

Sam frowned and reached up self-consciously to touch her still wet hair. Since it was longer it took decidedly more effort and time to get it dry and in shape. Gone was her personal record of taking ten minutes to get ready, five if there was an emergency.

"I know, I know," she grumbled and reached for her towel to dry her hair. She rubbed the towel roughly through her hair before she attacked it with her brush.

"Next thing I'm going to do is to cut it off," she announced angrily when she had finally worked through all the knots.

Jack stepped up behind her and ran his hand through her hair. "I don't know," he said. "It suits you. I like it."

"But it's so impractical!" Sam complained. With a sigh, she looked into the small hand-held mirror that lay on her desk. "Maybe I'll let it grow out again sometime, but as long as I'm on the frontlines I prefer my hair short."

Jack nodded. Sam knew he didn't really mind. He would love her however she would wear her hair as long as she didn't shave it off completely.

Sam looked back in the mirror at her half-dried hair and suppressed a curse. Getting impatient with the hassle that was her hair, Sam haunted down the tie she had used for her hair on Laterra. It was nothing like the hair ties on Earth, but it did its intended job just as good, so Sam pulled her hair back and tied the small band around her ponytail.

"I'm done," she decided.

Jack raised a brow skeptically. "You're gonna leave that wet?" he asked, motioning at her hair.

"It's not wet," she contradicted.

"Half-wet?" he corrected exasperated.

"It's alright," she insisted.

"Fine," he shrugged. "Just don't come complaining to me if you get ill."

Sam smiled roguishly. "Actually, you will from now on be the very first person I will go to complain."

He grinned back. "Blissful married life."

Sam nodded and then bent down to tie her boots. When she came back up, Jack stood next to her, his eyes fixing her with a searching, guarded expression. Sam raised an eyebrow questioningly. "What?"

He hesitated. "Speaking of married life…" he began.

"Yes?"

He pushed a hand into a pocket of his pants and then held something out to her in a rush. "There's something I wanted to give you."

Now curious, Sam turned and looked onto the tiny object in his large hand. She immediately recognized the shape to be a ring; an old, worn but still beautiful ring. It was a simple design, made of silver or maybe white gold with a small but beautifully glittering diamond inserted in the middle.

Sam gasped and then gaped. Where on earth had he gotten this ring…? They had been in confinement?

"Jack, where did you…?" she asked, dumbfounded.

Jack shifted slightly. "It belonged to my mother," he explained. "My father gave it to her at the birth of their first child. She wanted me to give it to Sara, as our wedding ring, but I had already gotten us wedding rings then, a matching pair with our engagement rings."

When Sam looked up, he shrugged, a blank expression on his face he often had when he had to talk about his past. "I kept it, intending to give it to her at… Charlie's birth, just like my father did, but I forgot about it. I found it after our separation when I moved out, and then it was kinda late. Afterwards I simply kept it as a keepsake of my mother. I don't have much from her, so I actually brought it with me when I moved my things to the base, figuring I would see it here more often than at home."

He inhaled and then continued: "I'd like to give it to you. At least until we can get out of here and buy our own wedding rings. Like… sort of an engagement ring? If you like it, that is."

Sam was struck silent, dumbfounded. She hadn't known he had such a ring, much less directly here on base, but that wasn't what surprised her. Jack was a private person and he never talked much about his past. But Sam hadn't even suspected he had been thinking about such a thing as wedding rings. In fact, _she_ hadn't wasted a single thought on wedding rings, despite _being_ married. She just lacked the experience, never having been married before, much less in a totally wrong order. But he had obviously thought of it and came up with this solution, gifting her with the ring of his mother. Sam felt… she couldn't really say. Happy? Exhilarated? Confused? Giddy? Delighted? Completely taken by surprise? All of the above?

Sam looked up to him, still trying to find words to express the whirlwind of feelings she was currently experiencing. "Are you… sure?" she finally got out, her voice throaty. When his face scrunched up, she hurried to explain: "I mean it belongs to your family. You sure you don't want to keep it yourself? We can always buy rings later…"

Jack chuckled. "Sam, you now _are_ family. And if I didn't want you to have it, do you think I would have offered?"

Sam's throat seemed to close up and her vision was conspicuously beginning to swim. "I'd feel… honored," she whispered.

Wordless, he held out his other hand and mechanically Sam laid her hand in his. He slipped the ring on her ring finger and Sam forgot to breathe for a moment. Experimentally, she moved her hand, the feeling of the ring unfamiliar since Sam never wore jewelry, and immediately the ring slid from her finger, clattering to the ground. It was too big.

Laughing, Sam bent down to retrieve it. Jack frowned. He had obviously not thought about the size of the ring.

"Seems we still have to buy wedding rings," he said, slightly put out.

"Probably," Sam agreed. "I'd like to have a match with your ring anyway. But can I still keep it?"

He narrowed his eyes. "Sam, you can't wear it."

"I couldn't anyways," she answered carefree. "It'll get in the way on missions and officially, I'm not even married. But I can do this."

Sam reached for the dog tags on her neck and opened the chain to add the ring. It clinked quietly against one of her dog tags to hang around her neck on the chain, glittering next to her worn tags. Sam gathered the ring in her hand, not able to stop staring at it, and suddenly she noticed there was an inscription engrained on the inside of the ring. Puzzled, Sam traced the small words with her eyes, reading _To the woman of my life_.

Again, Sam teared up. To think that she was the one standing here with Jack, receiving this ring, an heirloom of his mother, instead of his first wife, was so incredible, more than she could have wished for, and it showed her anew how very much her life had changed in the past half a year.

"Is this… okay?" Sam asked, unsure if that was what Jack wanted.

When she looked up, their eyes met directly, their gazes locking. He smiled, a small but honest smile. "Perfect," he said.

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Together, they left Sam's quarters and sauntered towards the elevator. The moment they stepped out onto the SGC's corridors, they fell back into their military personas, walking with the demanded distance in between them. Sam went back to call him 'sir' but she knew Jack wouldn't mind it now. Aside from an odd nostalgic and all-familiar feeling, it helped them focus and to differentiate between their private and their military personas.

Again, they needed more time to reach the General's office because they were held up regularly by various officers and scientists that wanted to congratulate them on their return. Many officers expressed their relief at learning that Sam and Jack had _just_ been on a long-term undercover mission and they smiled to the cover story as earnestly as possible. To most officers in the SGC aside of the few in the know, it had been declared that Jack and Sam had worked on a top-secret mission and most seemed satisfied with the explanation. Sam wasn't entirely sure a few weren't suspicious of the circumstances but as long as they had their lead officers and SG-1 back, they seemed willing to let the matter drop.

When they had finally made their way into the control room, Sergeant Harriman looked up at their entry and waved them over. "General Hammond has gone to the infirmary. He said he would wait for you there," he explained.

Sam nodded and turned to head back to the elevator when Harriman held Jack up. "Um, sir?" he asked. "Is it possible to make that thing behind the Stargate visible? Sergeant Siler is having a few problems to analyze it this way…"

Sam looked over the Stargate's controlling computers into the 'Gate room below. Behind the motionless Stargate a few technicians were crawling over the invisible glider under the careful eye of Sergeant Siler. They obviously tried to find out what they were studying but that proved to be rather difficult if you couldn't see what you were attempting to study. Sam barely held back the snort at seeing one of the technicians climb a ladder that seemingly hung in the middle of the air. It did look rather ridiculous.

"Oh, no problem, Walter," Jack agreed and almost instantly, Sam saw the glider blink back into the visible sphere. The technicians around it jumped out of the way surprised but Siler immediately shot around to glance at the control room. Jack waved at him over the stunned Sergeant Harriman's head.

Sam knew Jack had done it with a simple thought but all others seemed to be surprised at the impromptu solution to their visibility-problem. And with a smirk, Jack opened the rear door so that the technicians could inspect the glider all they wanted. He knew they couldn't use it without him anyways.

"That all?" Jack asked towards Harriman.

"Yes sir. Thank you, sir," Harriman said slowly.

"Alright. Then we're off."

And with that, Sam and Jack walked back to the elevator to ride up to Level 21, where the infirmary was.

When they entered, Sam could already see the General stand by an occupied bed with Janet and Teal'c. Janet was standing in their line of vision and when she noticed the two officers approaching, she alerted the other two men. The General turned and Sam and Jack greeted him simultaneously. Sam saw the General's eyes take them in routinely and when they landed on her, he smiled in a grateful manner that warmed Sam's heart.

"Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter," he acknowledged them. "It's good to have you back on the base."

"It's good to be back, sir," Jack admitted. "So you said something about us being needed?"

"Yes, but that can wait a little while more," the General said generously before breaking into an earnest smile. "I thought you might want to see this first."

And with this, General Hammond stepped aside and cleared the sight onto the hospital bed that was shielded from view by the curtains drawn all around the bed. Curiously, Sam leaned forwards and then gasped when she realized what she was actually looking at. Next to her, Sam felt Jack freeze with surprise and heavy silence settled within the roomy infirmary.

Sam was aware that General Hammond, Teal'c and Janet were all staring at them, judging their reaction, but she just couldn't avert her eyes from the sight. Shocked, Sam stepped forwards until her legs bumped into the bed, startling the dozing person in it awake.

Blue eyes locked with Sam's similarly colored one's and held on. And then he grinned, saying with a rough voice: "Hi, Sam."

"Daniel…!" Sam whispered, her voice sounding choked. Surprise, joy, relief and utter confusion battled within her for control and she was at a loss what to actually feel.

"Jack," Daniel said with a crooked smile.

"Space-monkey," Jack answered with a throaty voice and when Sam saw Daniel's exhausted face scrunch up at the hated nickname, she almost burst into tears. She had no idea how it was possible, but Daniel was lying in the SGC's infirmary, looking like shit but decidedly alive.

Sam sank down at the bed's edge and as if he was reading her thoughts, Daniel reached out towards her. Sam took his hand, careful of the IV attached to it and held on, assuring herself of his well-being by their connection.

"How is that…?" she asked, completely overtaxed with the situation. How was it possible Daniel was back? As far as she'd known, he had died.

Daniel shrugged. "I don't know exactly but I woke up in the middle of the 'Gate room two days ago…"

Sam squinted her eyes at the archaeologist. She knew her best friend and suspected immediately he was holding something back. He might not know actually what had happened but at the very least he had a suspicion. But he wasn't telling. For now. Sam would grill him later on about that. For now she was just glad he was back.

"Waking up is probably the wrong term," Janet interjected, but her voice sounded conciliatory. "The SF's found him unconscious and… naked."

Daniel visibly sulked at Janet's description when Jack began to laugh. Sam tried her best to hold in the smile when she saw Daniel was confronted with all his friends grinning at him.

"He just woke up this morning," Janet continued.

"And how do you feel?" Sam asked. Without having to look, she felt Jack come to stand behind her, gazing at Daniel over her head.

"Alive," Daniel said. "Thankfully."

"How much do you remember of what has happened?" Jack wanted to know.

"Everything. Astonishingly," Daniel admitted. For a moment he locked gazes with Jack and both their expressions turned carefully blank. Sam immediately got the impression they had some unfinished business with that experience but she also knew they wouldn't discuss it here, out in the open and while Daniel was still recovering. Whatever it was they needed to talk about, now was not the time for it and Sam felt herself confirmed when Jack settled on asking: "So what? This is what happens when you break the rules? The Ancients send you back into your former life?"

"What's very unlikely, sir," Sam replied in Daniel's stead.

The archaeologist nodded to her words. "That's not a punishment and the prospect could actually encourage people to break the rules. No, I'd think breaking the rules would equal total annihilation."

"So how come you're back with us?" Jack asked.

Daniel shrugged. "I'm as surprised as you are."

"Well, it's definitely good to have SG-1 back whole and complete," General Hammond smiled and Sam could only agree to that. But then the General continued: "However, I get the feeling there are still a few things you haven't told us, Colonel O'Neill, Major Carter?"

Um, yeah, Sam thought inwardly. And now it was probably time they informed their CO of all the little things they had left out in all previous interrogations, wasn't it? Sam knew that this episode wasn't finished and if the General wanted to deflect any future accusations, then he needed to have full knowledge of everything that had happened.

The General sighed. "I think another debriefing is in order," he decided. "But I will wait with that until Doctor Jackson is well enough to participate."

"Yes sir," Sam and Jack confirmed the unspoken order routinely. They had known they would have to 'fess up. But that was alright in Sam's opinion as long as she had Daniel back.

Jack shifted and Sam imagined him preparing to ask another question when the base's PA system suddenly announced: " _General Hammond to the control room, Colonel O'Neill to the control room._ "

Jack cursed and Sam looked back over her shoulder to him.

"I guess, I'm back on duty?" Jack asked towards the General.

"You sure are, son," the General smiled.

"Oh, the joy…" Jack murmured sarcastically while shoving his hands into his pants' pockets. He looked back towards his team and Sam could see his reluctance to go.

"Go, Jack," Daniel said. "I'll be here for a while."

"Definitely," Janet agreed.

Jack turned and followed the General's departure with his eyes. "Yeah. So you all have fun. I'll be back."

And with this, he hurried after the General. Sam knew he would rather stay with them but at the same time he would be glad to be back in his job. And Colonels Reynolds and Dixon would probably be, too.

Sam turned back to Daniel when Jack had left and saw her friend smile at her genuinely.

"So…" Daniel asked, seemingly innocently. "Something happen while I was gone?"

Sam refused to take the bait, seeing through his puppy dog eyes expression immediately. "As you can see, we drove off the Goa'uld and took control back over the SGC," she said.

Daniel pouted. "Not that that's not nice and all…" he grumbled. "But that wasn't what I meant."

Sam smiled. "Then you might have to be more exact," she suggested.

Daniel growled. "Are you trying to be difficult? I meant you and Jack!"

Sam knew immediately all attention was on her. From the corner of her eyes she saw Janet look up from the notes she'd taken in Daniel's medical file, her pen halted over the document, and Teal'c turned for her, a small smile gracing his features. After all, Teal'c was the only one in the picture right now.

"We're back on duty," Sam began hesitantly. "We're not going to be court-martialed for deserting because the JCS are of the opinion the Stargate Program's secrecy is more important than punishing us. But we're under tight observation."

Sam inhaled, inwardly steeling herself for her next confession. "And… we're married," she murmured.

With an audible clatter, Janet dropped Daniel's medical file.

" _What?_ " she exclaimed simultaneously with the archaeologist.

"We're married," Sam repeated, feeling herself blush madly. "But that's highly confidential, so keep that to yourselves!"

Daniel made a motion of locking up his mouth while Janet simply stared at Sam, mouth agape.

"How…?" Janet asked at a loss.

Sam pointed at Daniel. "It's his fault."

Daniel winced. "Ah, the document…?" he asked.

Sam nodded vigorously, before explaining for Janet: "He gave us a wrong document to sign when I updated my last will. It was an official marriage acknowledgement document. We signed it without noticing and Daniel sent it to the HR department."

"I actually had that because another colleague asked me for it," Daniel muttered contritely. "But I put it in the wrong folder and gave it to Sam. Sorry about that."

Janet grimaced empathetic. "Oh, I can imagine the ruckus _that_ caused," she said.

"Actually, it was our saving," Sam admitted. "With what happened between the Colonel and me off-world, that did save us from another court-martial."

"Oho!" Janet said with an excited and stubborn glint in her eyes that told Sam she would have to confess everything to her female friend the moment she would get her alone.

"Married," Daniel repeated amazed. "And here I thought I would get you into a shitload of trouble should you ever return…"

Sam squeezed his hand she was still holding. "Thank you, Daniel. For everything," she said, knowing he would understand what she meant.

He waved her off. "We're family."

Sam blinked when another wave of emotions hit her. Really what was with her and the constant crying she was doing nowadays? To change the topic and regain some control over her feelings, Sam asked: "So you really don't know why you're back here?"

Daniel shook his head. "I don't know for sure."

"But you have an idea," Sam concluded.

"More like a feeling," Daniel admitted.

"Can you tell us, Daniel Jackson?" Teal'c asked.

Daniel gnawed on his lower lip. "When Jack… died, Oma Desala helped him ascend. Initially, I thought she did it because I had asked her for it, but then I grew unsure. If they would do that each time someone would plead with them to help their loved ones…"

Sam nodded in understanding. "I know what you mean."

"But then what reason could the Ancients have had to ascend the Colonel?" Janet asked intrigued. "Sorry for saying it like that, but from your description, Daniel, I don't think Colonel O'Neill is the type they'd usually help."

"Exactly my thoughts," Daniel agreed. "Jack's not the type to bow to their rules and from the way you can watch anything from above, they would have known."

"So O'Neill had something the Ancients were interested in?" Teal'c speculated.

"Or he _is_ something they are interested in," Daniel corrected.

Something clicked for Sam and she gasped audibly. In a rush, she explained: "He's Ancient! Or at least, he has Ancient genes. When we were on Laterra – um, the planet we were hiding on the last months – we discovered a huge underground military base structure. It was secured and only accessible with the ATA gene. But Jack could access _anything_ on the base."

Daniel and Janet blinked uncomprehending but Teal'c caught on. "With such a large, important, military base it is to be expected the compartments are secured to open only to certain gene combinations to allow entry only to specific people, as a measure of security. Also considering the time that has passed since the Ancients have left this level of existence, it is highly unlikely that O'Neill could access all structures without problems."

Sam nodded. Teal'c was a warrior just like she and Jack were, so it was no wonder he had caught on fastest. "That's what I thought, too," she admitted.

"So what's going on?" Janet mused out loud. "Maybe the gene is stronger in the Colonel? Or the technology failed over the time?"

Daniel shook his head. "All Ancient technology we've encountered so far worked perfectly and flawlessly, no matter how much time had passed. It's usually built to withstand time, just like the Stargate."

Again, Sam nodded. "Nothing within the base has collapsed over time. Anything worked as if they'd left just yesterday. So there is only one possible explanation."

They all looked at Sam curiously. Sam had had that theory for a while but since it had been nothing but a theory, she hadn't really wasted a thought to it. But now, with what had happened with Daniel, maybe there was more to the theory than she had initially believed.

"Well, the only explanation I can think of is that the Colonel is a descendant of those Ancients that would have been able to access everything on Laterra," Sam said.

"Ah," Daniel nodded in understanding. "So someone high ranking or important."

"Like what… Ancient royalty?" Janet inquired.

Sam shrugged unknowingly. "Something like that."

"That actually makes sense," Daniel continued. "It would explain why the Ancients made Jack ascend. Seeing how rare the Ancient gene has become throughout the galaxies, it must be even more unusual to find someone with such a strong value of the gene. Jack might be more Ancient than he himself knows…"

"And maybe this is also why the Ancients sent you back, Daniel Jackson," Teal'c stated. "The Ancients have seen what you were willing to do to help O'Neill. Maybe they thought he might still be in need of your help in the future."

Daniel shrugged. "Why not?" he said. "Your guess is as good as mine. After all I can't exactly go up and demand an explanation from Oma…"

Sam smiled. "Whatever it is, we're glad you're back with us, Daniel," she summed it up. "Everything else we will find out with time."

Daniel looked back at her and returned her smile. He appeared still exhausted, but at least he was back with them. Sam sighed and felt herself relax in the presence of her friends. Jack wasn't with them as he had gone back to his job already, but Teal'c was there, and Daniel and Janet. And finally Sam felt she was back where she belonged: in her old life. Everything had returned to the way it had been before P3T-643. Well, everything aside of her and Jack's relationship. Looking at Daniel, who spoke with Teal'c while Janet next to them had gone back to scribbling notes into his medical file, Sam realized she finally had everything she could have ever wished for. She had the best job she could have ever imagined, she had all her friends and her little family back and she was married to the man of her dreams.

It seemed everything had worked out for SG-1, once again.

* * *

 _A/N: The next chapter will be the last one for Beyond Reason._


	59. Going on

_**Author's notes**_ _: Thank you all for reading, following and reviewing for this story!_

 _ **Beyond Reason**_

 _Chapter Fifty-Nine – Going on_

Yup, Jack thought while strapping his P90 routinely to his protection vest. Life had the strangest tendency to just go on.

With used movements, the Colonel grabbed his Berretta and stashed it into the holster at his thigh, followed by his combat knives. His body did the routine habitually but Jack couldn't stop the smile that spread over his face. It was SG-1's first mission after the Stargate had finally been repaired and opened again, and they had been cleared for gate-travel again, and it just felt so good to be back.

It had been five days since he'd gone back on duty and for once Jack hadn't even minded the shitload of paperwork he'd been greeted with. Reynolds and Dixon had obviously been rather relieved they could hand it back over to him, even if Reynolds had helped Jack out for another two days with the majority of the documents or Jack would have believed himself to still be stuck under a mountain of forms and mission reports. Dixon however had only grinned at him satisfied and then declared he was off for a vacation with his family. The lucky bastard.

Well, Jack could certainly understand his friend's excitement and even more so now that he had a wife of his own. Even if the times he had seen his wife in the last days could be counted on one hand. If Jack had thought himself to be buried under work, then he had been in for one big surprise at seeing Carter's schedule. Since they had been back on duty it was decidedly hard for him to get any time alone with her, because there was always someone interrupting with this important problem or that. And no, it was not Danny-boy, who was almost suspiciously keeping his distance to the newlyweds. No, either it was some Tech Sergeant who'd been sent to retrieve Carter because this technology or that was acting up. Or it was some nameless scientist who needed her expertise on some running experiment. Or it was someone calling her from the outside, from various Pentagon lackeys to Area 51 scientists to some NID representatives that were in dire need of Major Carter's profound opinion for this or that. But most of the time it was Dr. McKay, who would come and take her away from him, because they were still working on getting the security systems back on track, now redoing all the work McKay had done to shut Jack and Sam out of the system.

Really, Jack realized, since they had come back neither he nor Sam had yet left the base.

Given Jack wasn't really looking forward to driving back to his home and see what the leftovers in the fridge had turned into after the half year he'd been gone, but he had to admit the silence and unattainability of his own home sounded pretty good the more time passed. Jack loved the bustling of the base and the feeling to be back, but he would have also loved a bit of quiet time with his wife. Since they had returned to duty, he could count the minutes he'd had her to himself all alone on two hands. They usually only saw the other in passing, when they would bump into each other in the corridors, or at the coffee machine, or when they sat together in briefings. Still, the smile he usually saw overtaking her face when he would sit down next to her at the briefing table or let her go first at the coffee machine or the little gestures they shared while trying to be inconspicuous about it, like her grabbing his hand under the briefing table or a quick kiss they would share before they would part at their private quarters, kept Jack going. Well, it also helped that whenever he felt he was about to combust from Carter-deprivation he could just seek her out and drag her off to grab something to eat at the commissary.

Still, Jack was aware they hadn't really gotten any further. They hadn't really had any possibility yet to discuss their living arrangements or their wedding, but, according to Daniel, Sam had apparently started to carry around a folder in which she tended to scribble things. Jack didn't think that very unusual or important, but Daniel attached quite a meaning to it, seeing that she had seemingly started discussing the wedding with Daniel. Well, at least, Jack thought, she hadn't already forgotten about it due to all the important problems she had gotten swarmed with. And she was at least talking with someone about it. Just not with Jack. But that was probably due to the fact that they weren't seeing each other that much right now and still had to be careful to not give their change in relationship away.

The armory's door behind Jack swished open and turning, the Colonel saw Daniel and Teal'c stride in.

"Jack," Daniel said surprised before shooting a confused gaze at his wristwatch. It was a new one, a gift from Jack.

"You're… early," Daniel noticed.

"Yeah," Jack agreed but decided to leave it at that. He didn't really want to admit to anyone, least of all himself, how nervous this certain, first mission was making him.

And, apparently, it also wasn't needed, he thought upon seeing Daniel's understanding gaze. The archaeologist came to stand by his side and habitually grabbed a personal defense weapon to attach it to his utility vest. Jack followed his movements with his eyes, observing how comfortable the linguist had grown with weapons over the years.

Teal'c grabbed his staff weapon and turned towards Jack. "I believe it is time, O'Neill," he declared.

Jack nodded. "Anyone seen Carter?" he asked.

Daniel and Teal'c looked at him, rather nonplussed.

"What?" Jack grouched, feeling somewhat defensive. "It's not as if we're suddenly attached at the hip!"

"Well, last I've seen her she was working with Rodney at something in the control room," Daniel informed him.

Jack almost groaned. Great. Then he was sure Carter had lost track of time, _again_.

"I'll go get her," he said and leaving his teammates back, Jack lightly jogged for the control room.

The moment Jack stepped into the control room he felt his eyes almost routinely single her out. Even though there wasn't much of her to be seen in the first place. She was lying under one of the controlling computers, only her hips, her legs and feet visible while McKay crouched in front of her, talking to her legs.

"No, no, no, no, Sam!" McKay said just then and Jack almost scowled. Why did the man still insist he was allowed to call her by her first name?

"No," McKay went on. "No, what I meant, was–"

There was an exasperated sigh from under the computer. "Rodney, I know what you meant," Carter's voice answered, slightly muffled.

Jack stopped a little behind the two distracted scientists. Oh, _Rodney_ it was now? Jack tried not to feel ticked off by that. Since when were they on first name basis?

McKay began motioning with his hands in the air, although Carter couldn't see it anyways. "Okay, maybe you _do_ know, but you don't understand–!"

"McKay, I have built these systems! There's no one who understands better!" Carter snapped and Jack almost snickered at the irritation in her voice.

"Yeah, but–!" the other ingenious scientist insisted when Jack felt he about had it now. He cleared his throat loudly.

McKay looked up, apparently surprised and annoyed at the same time someone dared to interrupt their conversation. "Colonel O'Neill," he said astonished as if Jack was the last man he would have expected.

Carter twitched self-consciously and then a dull thud sounded out. Jack almost winced while McKay turned back to where Carter's legs were. Rather hastily she emerged, rubbing her head. "Sir!" she acknowledged his presence breathlessly before turning an endearing shade of red. "What time is it?"

"About time to depart," Jack answered.

She cursed softly and was on her feet immediately. "I'm so sorry, sir!" she said. "I just wanted to help Dr. McKay and then I…"

"Forgot the time?" he finished when she trailed off embarrassed.

"Yes sir," she whispered.

Jack pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to McKay. "McKay!" he barked.

"Yes?" the Doctor asked back rather unimpressed.

"Can you finish that alone?" Jack inquired while pointing towards the controlling computer which had a few cables hanging down onto the concrete ground.

"Who do you think I am?" McKay asked self-righteous.

Jack opened his mouth to answer with a few well-chosen words when Carter interrupted sharply: "Sir!"

Then she turned towards McKay with a taxing stare and the scientist caved. "Yeah, I can fix that alone," he said towards Jack.

Jack didn't even take the time to acknowledge that answer. "Then go gear up, Carter," he ordered.

She nodded and turned to head towards the armory, Jack right behind her, when McKay murmured under his breath: "Neanderthal…"

Jack twitched but managed to suppress the urge to turn back around and pack a bunch on the impertinent scientist. Carter shot him an apologetic and grateful glance that almost consoled Jack.

"How long's he stayin' again?" Jack growled.

"He will leave in a few weeks," Carter soothed.

It couldn't be too fast, Jack decided inwardly while walking towards the blast doors of the 'Gate room when Carter hurried off towards the armory. Well, at least they would be off-world for a while…

In the 'Gate room Daniel and Teal'c were already waiting. When Jack all but stormed in, Daniel raised a brow.

"What took you so long?" he asked while gazing around Jack. "And where's Sam?"

"She's getting geared up," Jack replied and rolling his eyes, he said: "We had to get rid of McKay first."

Daniel winced sympathetically. "Did he ask Sam out _again_?" he inquired.

Jack's head snapped around, his eyes boring into Daniel. " _What?_ " he all but snapped at his friend.

Daniel paled. "Ah, I take it, Sam didn't say a thing about that…?"

"No, she didn't!" Jack growled.

"Whoops," Daniel commented.

"Ya think?" Jack grumbled under his breath.

Sam chose this exact moment to jog into the 'Gate room. "Ready to embark, sir," she reported, slightly out of breath.

"Great," Jack stated sarcastically before he signaled up to Sergeant Harriman that they were ready to go. Jack heard the man page the General through the PA system and sulking, he waited.

Sam stepped up to him, her gaze curious and confused. "Is everything alright?" she asked quietly.

Jack turned towards her and reached out to adjust the strap of her P90. Sam let him prevail. "Is McKay bothering you?" he asked back just as quietly.

Sam looked at him astonished, but then he saw understanding dawn on her face. "Did Daniel say something?"

Jack couldn't help the accusing tinge his voice had when he replied: "He thought I knew."

Sam smiled at him encouragingly. "I didn't say anything, because it isn't a problem," she explained. "I told him I'm in a relationship."

Jack let go of her and grinned. "Really?"

"Nothing but the truth," she answered confidently.

"How did he take it?" Jack wanted to know, all but rubbing his hands in glee.

"Sir…" she admonished exasperated.

" _SG-1, you have a go,_ " General Hammond's voice suddenly boomed through the 'Gate room, effectively interrupting their conversation. Jack turned and waved when the General continued: " _Good luck and Godspeed!_ "

Simultaneously, Sergeant Harriman dialed up the planet SG-1's first mission was to go to, the chevrons locking one after the other until the wormhole kawooshed to life.

"Alright then, kids!" Jack said while adjusting the cap on his head. "Let's move out!"

Daniel grinned widely and with Teal'c hot on his heels, the archaeologist strode up the ramp to the waiting event horizon. Jack waited for Sam to pass him and then followed her up the ramp. Daniel and Teal'c stepped through the engaged wormhole and Jack watched Sam confidently make her way towards the glittering event horizon. The sight of her all geared up in her complete BDUs off on another mission with SG-1 was as familiar as exciting and Jack felt another grin tug at his lips. That was happening quite frequently these days.

Sam walked into the wormhole and blinked out of their universe, and routinely, Jack followed his wife. _His wife_. Take that, McKay.

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"First easy mission, my ass," Jack growled while kicking a small innocent rock that had the misfortune of having laid in his way.

From a little bit further up the road they were travelling, Daniel turned and walking backwards, he looked at Jack. "What's your problem? This _is_ easy."

"Maybe for you," Jack pouted. They had all no idea what _he_ would have to go through! Now that the SGC and the thought of an annoying scientist were far, far away and their mission was drawing closer and closer, Jack felt his nervousness return.

"Oh, come on," Daniel cajoled. "Aren't you happy?"

"About what?" Jack asked.

"Getting to gate-travel with SG-1 again," Daniel explained.

Jack shot him a quick glance and saw the archaeologist turn in a slow circle, sucking in the alien air of the planet they were visiting. At least Daniel was fully enjoying himself. Jack walked up to him and routinely, he let his eyes roam over his team. Since he was bringing up the rear, he had a good view on them all. Ignoring Daniel's antics for a while, Jack concentrated on Sam and Teal'c, who were walking at the front. His wife – wasn't it just _good_ to be able to call her that? – was speed-talking to Teal'c about something or the other the Jaffa seemed to be only half-listening to, but he watched her enthusiasm raptly with a small, understanding smile. Jack felt a similar smile tug at the corners of his mouth while he observed Sam's hands flying around her. She only rarely did that to emphasize her point and it usually spoke of her excitement. He knew she was looking forward to this mission and that was what was ultimately placating Jack. No matter how uncomfortable he was – or would be – as long as she wanted to be here, he'd go through with it.

"Yeah, it's nice to be back," Jack admitted to Daniel, who had taken to walk beside him. And it really was, but… "But why did it have to be _this_ mission…?"

"Oh, please, it isn't that bad," Daniel tried to comfort him.

"Yeah, because you're not the one who's going to have to go through this," Jack snorted.

"Yep," Daniel agreed, grinning widely. "And I don't envy you, either."

"Thank you. You're a real friend," Jack said sarcastically.

"Sir," Jack heard her voice cut in and looked up. Sam had stopped and waited for him to catch up, Teal'c standing at her side.

Automatically, Jack felt himself smile at her. It was a reaction he nowadays constantly showed to her, no matter where they were or what she was calling him. At their job, they were completely professional and always stayed at the demanded distance, since officially they were in no relationship whatsoever, but still Jack made sure that from time to time he would show her with little gestures what she meant to him.

"Is everything okay?" Sam asked lowly, her intelligent eyes scanning his face.

Jack barely suppressed a sigh and from the corner of his eyes he saw that Daniel and Teal'c let themselves fall back so Jack and Sam could talk.

"I told you, you didn't have to do this with me," she repeated.

He knew she was only thinking of his best interests but to hell with that!

"Carter!" he snapped. "I'm not going to let you do this alone! We're going to do this together. Aside from that, SG-1's my team and none of you is going anywhere without me."

She didn't comment his little outburst, even though Jack himself noticed the flaws in his logic. SG-1 was in no way his property or anything like that. They could very well go on a mission without him. Carter certainly had the rank and the experience to lead them. Or they could go with the backup of another SG team. They had done this before in various constellations. However, this was something… personal and no matter how much he wished he could be anywhere else, Jack wanted to be present. How fucked up was that?

"It's just… I'm nervous," he admitted to her.

"That's understandable," she said. "I'm nervous, too."

He raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Why are _you_ nervous?"

Carter actually began to fidget with her hands. Oh, she was so picking up his bad habits!

"Because, you know… this is something big…" she explained.

"Yeah," he agreed.

Jack swept his eyes over their all-green surroundings, wondering by the way how they were even supposed to make contact, because all he saw were wide, green meadows and, of course, trees.

"You don't have to be nervous," he reassured her.

Sam snorted. "Somehow, I feel _I_ should be saying that to _you_."

"Wrong," he countered. "I have _every_ reason to be nervous."

Sam shook her head. "I think he will be happy," she said.

Jack turned and looked at her incredulously. "You kidding me?" he asked. "I can't imagine Dad will be overly pleased to find out that I'm screwing his little girl!"

Sam frowned and then opened her mouth, undoubtedly to comment on the 'little girl' or the 'screwing', when a male voice suddenly asked from behind them: "What's _that supposed to mean?_ "

Jack almost jumped. Almost. He was a Special Forces Colonel with a reputation to uphold, after all. Still, with his stomach sinking to somewhere around his knees, Jack turned and shot what he hoped to be an apologizing smile at Jacob. The Tok'ra was standing just behind him between two grown trees, obviously the welcoming committee of the Tok'ra they had been trying to contact. The Tok'ra had moved planets again and SG-1 had been sent to their new home world to negotiate about another sample of the symbiote poison.

"Jacob. Hi," Jack said warily, holding out his hands in a placating manner. Jacob had a downright murderous expression on his face and out of the corner of his eyes Jack saw Daniel and Teal'c speed up to come to his help should the Tok'ra decide to lose it.

"Um, that didn't come out quite right…" Jack tried to explain while keeping a close eye on the zat at Jacob's hip. He had just been through a memorable experience with these things, no need to repeat that, thank you very much.

"Then explain it to me," Jacob snarled, obviously doing his best to not lose it with Jack. "But I suggest you are quick! My patience is wearing thin since my daughter went missing with her _Commanding Officer_ , who had promised to look after her!"

Jack winced. He had _known_ this would go down messy. He felt Jacob had every right to place the blame on him, because, admittedly, his ingenious solution had had a few downsides and one of them had been that they had to leave Jacob in the dark because of his connections to the SGC and Jack had already known then that Dad would take it the wrong way. Jack opened his mouth, searching for the right words, when Sam interrupted. Calmly, she walked over to stand in between the two men facing off.

"Dad, it's alright," she said. "The Colonel and I had to disappear for a while and I will explain it to you. But the Colonel kept his word to you. He took good care of me."

Jacob glared at Jack over his daughter's head. " _Screwing my little girl_ isn't exactly what I'd call 'good care'," he snapped sarcastically.

Jack almost blushed. Coming from Jacob's mouth, it really did sound so much worse.

Sam sighed. "I didn't mean it like that," she clarified. "What I meant is he ensured I survived."

Before her dad could comment it, she continued: "We had to flee because they were after our powers, but we came back when the Goa'uld attacked the SGC and now we're back on SG-1. It all worked out."

Jacob reached out and laid his hands on Sam's shoulders. "The Goa'uld attacked Earth?" he asked concerned. "I didn't hear anything about that! What happened?"

"We'll tell you," Sam said. "But I'm sure the Tok'ra will want to know as well?"

Jacob nodded, delaying the discussion. Then his eyes went back to Jack, his gaze boring into the Colonel. "So what _exactly_ did you do with my daughter?" he inquired pointedly.

"Yeah, y'know, long story…" Jack began, unsure where to begin.

Again, Sam cut in. "Dad, there're other reasons why we came. We need to negotiate with the Tok'ra about the symbiote poison and I wanted to ask you a favor."

Jacob still looked anything but relieved to see them, but he relented. "I'm going to bring you to the Tok'ra High Council. Follow me."

With Sam at his side, Jacob began to lead them and Jack hurried to catch up with Sam to walk on her other side. Daniel and Teal'c followed closely and again, Jack was kind of glad for their presence when Jacob shot him a scornful glance over Sam's head. He knew he was only temporarily spared. Going by the anger radiating off Jacob, the older man only just controlled himself, giving them a chance to explain. If he wouldn't be satisfied with the explanation? Then Jack thought they really had to give SG-1 over to another officer this time.

"So what favor did you want to ask, Sammie?" Jacob wanted to know while reaching out towards his daughter. Jack saw Sam grab her father's hand with a relieved smile. She had really missed him, he realized.

"I'm going to marry and I wanted to invite you," Sam said, practically beaming up at her father with joy.

Now Jacob looked thoroughly confused. "You're… what?" he asked as if he wasn't believing his own ears, anger momentarily forgotten.

"I'm going to marry," Sam repeated. "I wanted to have you at the ceremony?"

"You're engaged?" Jacob asked, completely bewildered while glancing at Jack from time to time.

Sam frowned. "No, actually, I am already married. But we have just signed the license and now we wanted to have a proper ceremony."

Jacob halted and looked at his daughter. "Sam… I don't understand," he sighed.

Sam smiled. "Dad, Jack and I have married. But we only had a small window of time to do that and now we want to marry again with a ceremony."

"You have… _what?_ " the Tok'ra spluttered, obviously having trouble to catch on.

Sam chuckled and pulled out her dog tags for her father to see. Jack watched Jacob attentively, trying to assess the other man's mood while the Tok'ra bent forwards to take a look at the ring dangling next to Sam's worn dog tags, his eyes skimming over the inscription.

"Really?" Jacob asked, still completely confused. His gaze shot over to Jack and tentatively, the Colonel smiled back.

"No idea what she wants with me, but astonishingly she said yes," Jack tried to joke.

Jacob reached up and scratched his temple. "That is… unexpected," he finally admitted.

Yup, Jack contemplated inwardly, he'd thought something similar when he had heard of his marriage.

"We will explain everything," Sam promised.

"Yes, a little context would be really helpful here," her dad replied. Then he started walking again and pulled Sam with him by their still joined hands. Jack and the rest of the team followed immediately.

Their journey was almost peaceful with Daniel and Teal'c talking quietly behind them and Carter bringing her Dad up to date. Jack however stayed silent, trying his best to not attract too much attention to himself. He didn't really succeed with that though, he observed whenever Jacob was glancing at him with an upset gaze. Sam however would then shoot him an encouraging smile.

"So… married?" Jacob asked finally, with obviously mixed feelings, when Sam finished their tale.

Sam beamed at him so happily Jack could see Dad melt to that. "Yes!"

"Well, then… congratulations… I think," the Tok'ra said slowly, his eyes measuring Jack with an accuracy that made the Colonel slightly uncomfortable.

"Thank you, dad," Sam and Jack said simultaneously.

"So, does that mean you'll come to the wedding?" Sam inquired hopefully.

Jacob smiled, even though still slightly strained. "Of course I'll come to the wedding of my only daughter, Sammie."

Now Carter was practically radiating happiness. She was almost bouncing with excitement before she threw herself at her father to embrace him wholeheartedly. Jacob returned the hug but over Sam's head, he threw a thorough scowl Jack's way.

"Sammie seems… happy," the retired General admitted reluctantly and almost quietly to Jack. Sam's happy humming ensured she didn't hear it.

"She is," Jack nodded.

"Yes," Jacob agreed. "And you know that's the only reason I'm not breaking one of your bones, right?"

"Dad!" Sam interrupted angrily, inserting herself back into the conversation while simultaneously drawing back from her father.

Jack almost rolled his eyes. Yup, _that_ reaction of Jacob he had actually expected. "I know, sir."

"And you know I will still break a few of your bones if you ever hurt her, right, Jack?" Jacob continued menacingly and Jack didn't doubt the other man for a second.

"Yes sir," he confirmed. Next to him, Carter looked ready to explode on her father.

"Still…" Jacob went on and Jack asked himself inwardly if there still was a threat they hadn't gone through yet. The Tok'ra looked at Jack and with honest sincerity, he said: "Thank you."

"For what?" Jack asked confused. He couldn't really see Jacob being grateful that he had married his daughter. Sometime, perhaps, but not right now.

"For bringing her back. Unharmed," Jacob clarified.

Jack looked over to Sam, who stood with her hands at her hip, still furious with her dad for being rough with her husband. Only the sight of her was enough to lift his mood and he felt himself smile back at Jacob with an equally sincere grin. Looking Carter straight into the eyes and remembering everything that had happened between them the past months, Jack answered with complete honesty: "Always."

* * *

 _A/N: So this is it. A long journey coming to an end._

 _Eight months of writing, almost a year of correcting and uploading the chapters, over 500 pages in Word and nearly 300.000 words in total, with almost sixty chapters, this story really was an eventful trip. So a huge thank-you to all readers who went with me on this journey and stuck with me and the story till the end. Another huge thanks to all reviewers who left a comment, and special thanks to those who reviewed every single chapter – you guys are the best! I really hope you liked the story and had as much fun reading as I had writing._


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